S2 - Ep. 71 - Sara Schaefer

Are you leaving?

I you wanna way back home? Either way you want to be there, doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us time and a terminol and gay. We want to send you off in style. We want to welcome you back home.

Tell us all about it.

We scared her? Was it fine? Malborn? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

Do you need with Karen and Chris welcome to do you need to ride? This is Chris Fairbanks and this is Karen Kilgariff. Hello, Karen, Hi, Chris.

I was just swimming.

I was just swimming.

Nuh uh, yes, are you serious?

Yes?

I have what hair?

Do you have? What hair?

Is that what your mother say? I drove home and during that time it dried a little, but yes it's still wet.

Guys.

We need you to know that Chris and I did not join a swimming class together.

This is pure.

Plan that we were both simultaneously swimming. We were doing sanchronized swimming and we didn't even know it.

What were you doing? I was doing a lot of the frog.

It was the uncontrollable but not useful frog. It's it's better for my hips, right.

It's like you're doing all four it once, but you're really making your upper thighs get you somewhere.

Yeah, and it's really my arms doing all the work. But it's uh, yeah, I gotta do those frog kicks.

And yes, everybody gets a chance. The arms have to work hard, but the legs they're there.

They're trying.

I don't ignore them. And I was wearing flippers and my snorkel and everything. It was just it was just an hour ago.

Guys, swimming Kismet is one of the more exciting ones I've ever experienced on a podcast.

I don't know about you, Chris.

Now what you don't know about me is that I and I'm just going to be open about it, do not know what the word kismet mean.

We have to bring our guests in.

I know she'll know we're kind of like a fancy.

We do a little riff beforehand, and that is concluding.

How would we do it like this?

We'll set it up almost like one of those Electric Company word game setups, where I'll say what I think it means, and then Sarah can come in with the correct definition, because I think it's like a fancy writer's way of saying fate.

Okay, And so I'll start it by simply restating re asking, what does kismet mean synchronicity?

I don't know.

Here.

She is, Ladies and gentlemen, our guests for today, Sarah Shaeffer. We had her back in and then turn around. Yeah, that was amazing.

Sarah is a very very funny coming. I don't know if I very well be weird to just tell you I like your comedy voice, the way you tell your jokes. Agreed, Uh, she is a I.

Like your jokes, but I wish you didn't say them that way.

Right, Yeah, I've never said that, you have no literally you would.

Just say them differently.

Could you say faster, faster and sexier?

Sarah's a podcast.

Sorry, I totally door stopped that compliment. Chris jump back into It's okay.

I'm just leading up to She is quite legitimately, and it's gone viral at this point. And it was just I think something you started doing during quarantine, but your miniature comedy club has blown me away. Yeah. Every time I look at it, it is and when I everyone knows I'm into that, and I bought a kit and I spent time on the kit and I customized it.

On a real place, right, Sarah. It's a real green room.

I mean it's real in that it's a it's a what does a songwriter say, it's a composite.

Oh yeah.

All the boyfriends I've ever had is song is about No. Yeah, the green room is definitely a composite of like green room tropes very much though so real looking to so many people that I've heard, oh that's the green room at whatever club, and I'm like, yeah, I didn't really model it after one, but it was like the essential green room. Yeah, but yeah, No, I've been into miniatures and dollhouses and stuff my whole life, but I never

And then I started a new.

House, which I got a kit and started like customizing it. But in the one I started that, I was like, oh, what if I made a little comedy club. And then that took over and the house is just like in a pile in the corner right now, and I'll be getting to that.

Like so many people were sending me that and I was like, this is amazing, and I did not realize you had made it. I was I even gave it repeat viewings. How do people look at it just on your Instagram?

Yeah? I just posted pictures of it on my Instagram and uh my Twitter.

And I mean if you google it like Sarah Shaeffer, haha, hole, like you'll find it.

I love it.

I'm so embarrassed that I that I thought it was really.

So many people did people like Sarah Shaffer opened a club.

I'm like, oh my god, for tiny people. No, there's no one in it. I make dollhouses. I don't play with dolls.

Dolls die. Then open a real comedy club.

Well, I mean, such an uphill battle from jump.

It's just so funny that we were making miniatures at the same time. Dare I say a kismet situation. Yeah, it was like, hello, someone broke in your house.

I just got really scared.

What I think it was my air conditioning turning on and the door got sucked closed a little bit. But I'm like home alone for the first time in a really long time, like my husband is traveling, and it really scared me. Sorry, do you want to check? Do you want to just get a look at the door?

Yeah?

Wow, Well, if it's any consolation, we miss myda.

That's all it was.

It was sucked.

Yeah.

Good. But because I had that sends on, it was like, because you know what, when I'm podcasting, my husband will sometimes come in the bedroom and I'll hear that same noise, and so I was like, oh.

Scott, where is Scott's out of town?

Okay, anyway, I didn't follow your advice, Sarah as you stood up to check the door.

Chriscos, the good news is at least we'd have their own.

Film we catch it right away.

My point being the terrible thing's gonna happen, at least it would be we.

Would have heart of it is. Yes, rely on us for descriptions.

It would be honestly, my greatest honor would be, you know, for you guys to cover it.

Yes, absolutely, anyway, sorry about that. I'm very jumpy.

That was exciting, but yeah, I people were thinking it was real and and Chris, I didn't know you were into it either until someone or when that came out, people are like, oh, Chris Fairman, they were tagging you, and then I was like, oh my god, I can't believe we've never talked about this before.

And the people that were showing it to me, I don't think they knew you were a comic. They didn't know we were intertwined, and that's a weird connected in any way. There we go and it, like I said, it took me a long time before I realized you had made that. It's just really a cool piece. Ar Thank you very have.

You When you kind of come out as someone who's into miniatures, what ends up happening is everyone sends you every miniature thing they see, yes, and I just I'm like happy about that, but I also am like, you think the algorithm doesn't know me, You think the algorithm like you know me better than the algorithm, Like I've already seen it ten times by the time you send it to me.

Oh, I know, I know, yeah, and I yeah, that's exactly what I always had. I've just gotten anytime they're skateboarding that involves it, I get sent. I'm like, I don't tell anyone. Oh, I've seen that and I love it. I'm just like, wow, thanks. I just want to give them the credit of describing something for me. It takes less energy too.

Yeah, right, like I already saw it. Like, well, that's kind of a dick thing to do. I don't do that.

But like, what what was your first dollhouse situation? Like, how did you get introduced to this world as a child.

Well, my older sister had a dollhouse, and then I guess probably when I was like.

Eight years old, I got my own dollhouse.

And it was like unfinished, would you know, Like I think it was a kit my dad had like put together the night before.

A lot of glue was visible. But it was like this three story tutor.

You know, I was in my younger in my early childhood, I was very fortunate to have access to toys like that. Yeah, and they it was like really elaborate, and I just became obsessed with it. All my allowance money I would save up to buy pieces of furniture to go into it, and I never got around to like finishing it, and so it's just this. I just kept it in storage

So I was like, Okay, I got to do this now.

And so I got into it and I got really obsessed. I mean I put shingles on it and did all this stuff and ended up I ended up giving it away. But it was like just the I wanted to finish it after all these years, and it was really rewarding.

I saw that, Yeah, I just had forgotten about the house before you're comedy club. I forgot about you acquiring that old house and fixing it up. Yeah, so you're a lifer. You've done this for years.

I have, But I mean it didn't go into the level of obsession that it has until I had all this time, because you know, once you start making the stuff and like really creating things, it just is very addictive.

Yeah, although I do have a house kit and I bought bricks and little bags of cement and cinder blocks. I was going to add a little DIY skatepark on the side of this house and make little ramps, and I just kind of it's sitting here. I don't know what I've been going outside.

Yeah, I've been in that things opened up, and I have been traveling and you know, having that experience. So but I feel that I know that at some point I'll be drawn back into it.

Yeah, it's like you have a puzzle table, like how rich people have puzzle tables in the corner where you can just.

Always have your project. Do you just know it's waiting for you when the time is right, when it.

Goes back to that vibe, because I bet it was so satisfying. Like I really do love miniatures and looking at the detail work, because then you know the people like doing miniatures and they like a lot of times the things that they're making miniatures of.

Right, you'd have to be interested, so it was just so clear. You have stood for.

Hours upon hours and in comedy club green rooms, you know what I mean. It's like it's a green wall, it's a black leather couch that looks like it's from twenty two years ago. It's this, it's a mini fridge. Like it was so clear and perfect and that's so enjoyable. Of like, this is what it's like, right, everybody.

Well, and it becomes very contemp contemplative, contemplative where you're like thinking about I got really like deep into thinking about comedy and my place in it and like getting really metaphorical in my head and like aren't we No comedy club is big enough to handle the vast of talent out there?

And who are the gatekeepers?

I mean, I just and I got stressed because I made like this wall of little head shots and just being that kind of gatekeeper for my own creation, my own fantasy creation, stressed me out to the point like I had some people text me like mad that they weren't on the wall, and I was like, I can't try it, of joy, and I'm like, I know you're.

Upset, Like I can't.

I was like, this is too much responsibility I'm really glad I'm not a booker.

I don't ever want that job.

But you get canceled on social media for the fake headshots on your fake miniature, Well, I'd be amazed.

It was a whole.

It really made me think a lot about comedy and my place in it, and it was just a very transformative creative project.

Nice. Do you have plans for a next one?

Yeah?

Well, I I did a live show in the club.

Like two weeks ago, and that was really successful and it was very very fun, and I like made dolls out of the comedian like real comedians, so like Osco uh uh Okasca did it and Patton Oswalt, and I made dolls to look like them as much as I could.

The options are really limited.

And when Crystal Adams, so I put them on a stick. And because like I built the club without thinking I would do something like this, so I had to, like I had him on a stick and they would be like moving around. And my husband is a director, specifically, he's done a lot of comedy special so he knows

It made me go, like, what else can I do with this?

So that if this is a show pitch, I have green led. I mean there's so many they've over and over they've done comedy and animated it. Yeah, there's been so many shows to actually have little dolls of comedians. And if you could, you know, do Claiint stop motion mouth lip syncing and actually do a Wallace and Grommet comedy show, I always be it would be both of my world's exploding and making me so happy. Yeah, I want it to happen.

There's enough interest here I show.

Yeah, Okay, I will do anything I can. I like to sculpt. I will make little cat and bold faces because that was the first thing I thought too. Right now, I have a little Dodgers player in my library grabbing a book instead of catching a high fly. I just don't have a lot of figurines or dolls. But I've been wanting to do a little old man like just to practice animation. I've never done it, take little pictures of a guy reaching for a book or a librarian type.

Well, now they have apps and stuff that like make stop motion so much easier. It's still very time consuming, but you know, like my six year old neighbor made a stop motion movie with the iPad and I was like, oh God, we are so far in the future now that like that is something that I mean, I.

Do it. I want to see it.

Yeah, bub was it good? Like give us your she's not here right now.

I mean she had to really work on the story, but.

Yeah, she needs to punch it up.

Yeah, they never get the three act thing.

That is really true though, the idea that it's in people's hands, like the ability to do things that we couldn't do twenty years years ago at making things like this terrible pandemic a little more livable and maybe kind of then a little more interesting, you know, like like I.

Didn't know that about Chris, and.

Then I'm kind of like and I didn't know it about myself because actually, yeah, that's right. When people send me miniature things, it's my favorite thing to look at.

Like that's cool, right, And like, I think one thing that people like about miniatures is it's fantasy and it's cute, and it's also wonder and magic that like, we don't really have a lot of it. And one of the things that people a couple of people said about the show I did in the club, they were like, because it was really they were like, it was so analog, like because I just had them on a stick and was moving them around and it wasn't stop motion animation,

I was like, thank you.

Yeah, it's two D.

Yeah.

Even though show I did that was like it was a SIMS like video game and they made an icon of you, but you're just in a room and people look at that instead of stand up and people love that. They love watching a visual that isn't just our ugly mugs.

Yeah, anything to change Zoom because I sort of got it is just it's torturous. It's so awkward. My timing is always off. I always have wet, weird hair. It just is like it's a real trial and tribulation.

I think I'm even confronted by the fact that we're getting good at Zoom.

I know, our timing fronting.

Yeah, what once we're back in the car, will will even be able to do this? Be so too much freedom?

Yeah, well we'll have big, long pauses that we don't need, even though we're sitting right next.

To you each other.

Chris just so scary to talk at the same time.

It's just how it is.

Oh, I was just gonna ask, what's that Tony Kollett movie Hereditary.

It's one of my favorite movies.

Is it your favorite?

Well? I love horror and it's amazing, and I mean, I know you do too.

And I like went to see Hereditary because I knew I liked that filmmaker and I knew I loved Tony. I saw the preview and was like, oh my god, this is going to be so good. And we went to the opening day movie theater, and uh, I didn't know that it had a miniature element to it. And so the movie start, I'm already so excited because I know it's going to be good and and I heard had heard it's really scary, and I'm like, I don't like it if horror movies aren't scary enough.

Yeah.

So the very first scene is the dollhouse stuff coming up, and my husband said he looked over at my face and I was just.

Like, oh boy, oh what here we go?

The true child inside came out of like.

Oh yes, I love God seeing in the theater. It was so fun and I just loved it.

It was only and I have no complaints about I love the movie. I just at the end, it's like, hey, it's the Devil the end. I want no metaphor when when the sweet and bizarre? Have you seen those that girl in her sister they're singing group by the way, the actress that plays the little girl they do YouTube it. It's very Uh, I've rewatched it. They are there, they are it's eerie. That's these two little girls that sing in unison. But when her like she's beheaded and then

Wait, the Devil doesn't exist, but evil miniature houses with people.

Of them too.

I want. I believe in magic, not religion, my apologist, that's on me. I believe in the dark arts, not just Satan.

You'll love to know that Satan invented the Dark girln No, it's his project.

Well, a lot of people took it over and they're way more talented than Beezel bub.

Well.

I read an interview with the director and I can't remember exactly what he said, but he talks about why he decided to make the ending a literal as opposed to metaphorical, and I remember finding it very interesting, like, oh yeah, He's like at the end, I didn't want people to. I don't remember what he said, you'd have to look it up. But the whole time, I'm like, this is a I'm like, every movie is about grief, every horror movie is about grief, and this one really gets into grief.

And yeah, and that part I love, Yeah, Yeah.

And I loved it. And then at the end, I was like, oh, it's also about the devil.

I was like, why all that miniature work, all the great job of filming, all the manu and then it didn't pay Yeah.

It's because all the work you both do on miniatures, Hail's paymon, and you have to admit it that you're you're doing it.

You're doing his bidding in the miniatures.

You know.

I was going to tell you, guys. I think I've told Chris this before.

But Sarah, when I was like seven or eight, my dad Christmas made my sister and I a dollhouse using stuff that they had used in our house, so like the kitchen and the dollhouse had the linoleum in our kitchen and carpeting every room. And he did and he was telling the story like my sister and I of course went insane and were obsessed with it and the other like the last time I was home, he was telling someone someone someone else the story and uh, and he was like kind of going, yeah, we tried to

Both were like, what are you talking about? That was our favorite toy of all time.

He was like, oh, really, we're like that was like the Christmas It was like a house of our house.

He was holding it to a higher standard than a child.

Yeah, yes, exactly, My dad and I think the same thing. I got into it because of just making models of little cars, and then I got into like making war scenes and melting little soldiers and pools of blood and and putting snow and all the mud was tiled route and I would enter it in the fair and one time I got this blue ribbon and I was all excited, and so my dad and I made a train set with a tunnel and the train would go through the tunnel.

Listed it out, and one day it was gone.

I'm like, where's this train set? I want to put it above my bed like Arthur Bach. And you know what a great way to wake up at eight am, or let's be honest, nine am, a train goes off and little bells and whistles. I always thought that in your there comes in. Yeah, just Ricky Schroeder way to wake up. And then it was gone. It was gone. I think, given away for free. I guess I'm kind of mad at my dad about this.

You guys, sounds like you need to make a phone call.

I will.

A lot of it is sad though that he thought, like, throw all this out because some technicality that like just for one second, think about how a kid looks at stuff like I don't give a shit.

Yeah.

Yeah, we peeled up the mountain, we re soldered the tracks. We he did it all, and then we glued it back down. And then because the train was going and then we put the tunnel back on, it started derailing. It was I think it was his frustration. We just gave it to it of a neighbor kid or something.

Well, you know, we should change the subject because Sarah wrote a book and I bet you'd want to maybe talk about that a bit.

Sure, A hint.

Sure, it's a memoir. It is, I believe it's pronounced.

Yeah, questioning that decision even after it's been out for a year. No. I My book is called Grand and uh it's kind of like a I guess the easiest way to describe it is like it's a funny wild and it's like me going into the Grand Canyon on a trip with my sister and then I like flashback some memories from my life, and you know, I'm very proud of it, and I think people like it, the

If you do whatever that's sat on Comedy Central or have a stand up anywhere, it lasts for two weeks and then yeah, you're onto the next thing. You're like, I thought that would fulfill me in some way, but it's over already.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, at least a book lasts. Yeah.

Well, and also you put so much I mean, especially if you're writing about your life, that is like a special kind of level of work where you're being you're exposing yourself while being entertaining, like you're kind of delivering the goods, but also you have to be vulnerable and real. It's it's a tall order and it's a it pulls a lot out of you.

So oh my god, I felt like I was sick, Like, yes, I had to be taken care of during it because it was just so I was just sharing things I'd

I mean, like it ye may.

It lifted up some things that I had been keeping inside and was afraid to say, and some of it. I just was shocked that I was even afraid to say some of it, you know, and then was like, oh wow, because people be like, oh my god, that part you wrote about that must have been really scary.

To write, and I was like, oh no, no, it was the.

Part that no one thought was scary that I was like, oh my god, I have to admit that I'm like insecure about my career, Like but you talked about all this other shit.

You're divorced and you know, but yeah, yeah, it.

Was really an amazing exp and you know, so I've been starting to people have been starting ask like, are you going to write another book?

And I'm like, I know, I.

Spilled the beans already.

Maybe one day, maybe if something really cool happens that it just demands a book like, oh, I died and saw heaven for thirty seconds, Like.

Yeah, I got to write a book about that.

Yeah, please write that Book's Sarah, because instead of it being like a child, you know, like as dictated to their you know, brain surgeon or whatever, it's like Jesus as faith.

Key to me.

But it's just you just be like, hey, look I have this story. It's kind of like a dream, but guys saw God anyway.

Yeah, you guys can figure it out. But here's what happened.

Glowing lights. Yeah you know the story.

Yeah, everyone says the light thing. There's got to be something to it. Gotta be Yeah, I believe in God. It's not the devil, Karen.

I know we won't try to make you believe in the devil on this episode.

I'll stop shutting. It's just interesting.

Did you see there was a Netflix series about Oh, it's like tall Afterlife and stuff.

Yeah, I died for a minute. I can't remember when it's tall, but yeah, there was.

A lady who died for like seven minutes in a kayak like flipped over, and like they brought her back from like complete water death.

Like there's a sorry, so many strong stances on this.

You know what, and you know what, canoes. Canoes can suck it too.

No, all the skinny boats.

You heard me, you're blowing up all our careers.

Not just sorry.

Sorry, I don't like to boof it down the wall to waterfall, you paddlers. Sorry.

My only point was sorry to retell a TV show.

But on this TV show, there was a little kid, and he's now a teenager who is clearly uncomfortable about it. But when he was a kid, he was convinced that he was an agent from Hollywood from the forties and fifties, and he knew people's names and made all these references, and they checked it out and he completely knew this

I don't geh.

They just I just saw a headline on a news story the other day that was like a little a three year old said he was a woman was talking to him, like at some campsite or something or whatever, and they're like, he had all these details and it's the exact description of a woman that missing there.

No, And my first thought was she's a lie, she lives there.

She's yeah, and she went up to him it's like hate little boy, and then ran back into the woods.

Uh, that's the stuff like that.

It's wo But was the story framing it like the three year old was possessed by the missing woman or something?

No, that he had like been seeing her and like talking to her.

Yeah, like just you know, and a lot of times these stories then five years later you find out that the parents coached.

Them, iver told them to say it or whatever. But some of it is her.

You can't explain on its face though, that's a great story. Yeah, the lady that's like the great opening of a horror movie is really a three year old that's like, but the lady, it's so good.

My dad was working in a Montgomery Wards, uh, changing tires in I think the sixties, and someone called in and my dad doesn't believe in anything. He's always been kind of atheist, even as he gets older, he's not become spiritual, and I love that about him. But he bless him when he was here, or whoever made the light magic bless him. Someone called in and said, I want to pick up my truck. I had a truck

He had like a weird experience that he knows the weird bhone.

Yeah, and there was no explanation, And because there's no explanation, and because he's not a spiritual person, he kind of just doesn't want to talk about it because it was scary at shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, is my truck done yet? No ghost call? Ghost down?

Fine?

Yeah, yeah, I have to ask him the details. My little anecdote it started so well, you know, no, I believe in I.

Believe in mister Fairbanks's experience. And you know that, like that did it happen?

That's weird. Shit happens all the time.

Yeah.

For us to think that we know the full extent of human experience is so naive and and like egotistical to just think that, oh, we've.

Got it figured out.

We know that that doesn't happen, and that it's like do we really know exactly?

Do we?

Or are we very scared about what we don't know?

And so we need to make up these things to make ourselves feel better.

It could never happen. Okay, great, and you must feel so relieved.

Yeah, let's talk about aliens.

No, they're scary, really And when it comes to horror movies, I like ghost stories that are really scary. I like, you know, I like pretty much all of it. I don't love like just Gore for the sake of Gore, like Saw and Final Destination.

You've seen Mary Anne Sarah, No, oh my god, watch it right when we're done. It's French. Watch it in French. It's so I've talked about it so much. Everyone's probably tired. But a lot of people have watched it and heard me talk about it, uh, and then they watched it because of the podcast. It's scary, and it is in that hereditary way. There's no jump scares. It is just eerie. And then it goes off in the backstory of this girl and her friends.

Now I'm wondering if I have to, I don't, I'll check it out.

It will melt your face off. I've watched it multiple movies.

The movies that scare me the most for some reason are ones involving aliens, like Dark Skies. I was like, you know when someone sees a mouse and they get up on the furniture, like get it away. That's how I was like. No, I was like screaming, losing my shit. I really think aliens are scary. And I'm not talking like Alien the movie. I'm talking like Close Encounters type stuff.

The concept, the concept of being.

There, that alien head shape with the skinny arms really.

Just everyone, Yeah, why is that always the shape? Why is it always that oval?

With that comes to a point because Chris, and this is why I'm so scared of it is growing up I guess I saw some unsolved mysteries or some shit on TV about alien abductions, and I just became convinced that every time I saw light out the window that it was time and I was like going to get sucked up.

And uh, I always thought it was Santa Claus Rudolph, Yeah, you're so sweet.

Well, but anyway, that alien shape is what people see in their abduction experiences, and that is a They've like done studies where it's like the human brain will concoct similar shapes and things.

But what if it's because that's what people actually saw.

Well, I hate to do this now in the same way. I know for a fact, Chris.

I've mentioned this a thousand times. I'm truly obsessed with the show Ancient Aliens.

I know that it is absolutely like racist and reductive and in safe where they're like who could have been invented this where it's like the fucking Incan's the maans like.

The pyramid is offensive?

Yeah, but but what what some of the things that they're trying to pull through are fascinating, which is like there you know, the elongated skulls that they have found around the world that are there was skull wrapping in Egypt, like Commons skull was wrapped in elongated and his sisters and that was like.

A trend or whatever that was. It was all the rage.

But then they've also found ones that the bone is thicker than normal human skull bone and it can't be drilled into and this, and that's so like I love that show for the pure like freaking out, like the unexplained aspect of those things where it's like, yes, most of what you're saying is total bullshit and just weirdness, but there's just little things here and there where you're like, we don't know, we just don't know. Yeah, and that

Yeah, leave me be. Let's deal with the problems right in front of us, you.

Guys, Yes, which are maybe what we need is a common enemy to unite us.

Yeah, you're right. The virus isn't working anymore. Let's go right, oh just right.

Yeah, that's funny.

They did kind of try to bust that, like with that was it sixty minutes that story about there that there's.

Proof or whatever that they actually did.

Was it the air force that went on the record of saying that there are definitely UFOs.

Yeah, wasn't the the wasn't there supposed to be breaking news coming up real soon? Didn't they find?

I mean they tried to do it, but I feel like, as almost like as a globe, we all went, no, we're not we can't.

Do this, like we're not interested in the month.

Eight of COVID. No we're not doing this.

Yeah, it's terrible timing for alien news.

No can't. Please, don't make me.

Yeah, wait till I'm bored.

It would suck if you were an alien and this was your time for your article to come out. Finally, your big article, your big article, your big profile.

You thought it was going to come out. They're like, it's just not the right time.

Sorry.

I was always thinking, what a terrible time for aliens if they had visited Earth during quarantine, because no one would be walking around. We'd all seem really rude. No one would shake their hand, everyone's just touching elbows. They'd really get a bad impression of humans. I think, Yeah, not now, yeah, no one, what's night. They all had like they wear cloth on their mouths. It just was lame. I don't like Earth let's go and.

Stay up to you know what I wanted to ask you, Sarah, And you can absolutely tell me if you don't want to talk about this because we didn't like it. I didn't run it by you. But do you ever miss doing daily live television? Oh?

Okay, well do you mean Nicky and Sarah?

Yeah?

It was weak?

It was weekly?

Oh sorry, and it was live season one and then season two we pretended it was still live, but then they were like, it's too crazy doing it live because we couldn't get any guests to come to the studio at eleven pm, right, and so we kind of did more of a traditional late night live to tape where it was essentially live.

But it was a great show. I remember whatever job I had at the time we watched it. I think it was well whatever we watched, you guys, and more like the live aspect.

I was obsessed with it because that's such a roll.

Of the dice, and you guys handled it like it was really really enjoyable and entertaining.

Thank you. I mean it was like, I mean, I miss the whirlwind of it all. I miss like the money and I'm.

Do you miss that all? When I because I went and did your podcast and you and Nikki were working.

And you were in our office.

I was in that office, and I was like, oh my god, I was just made. I was nervous by just how much pressure was it looming over that giant office.

Yeah, it was really stressful.

Like I don't miss the stress of it, but I miss like, you know, it was very exciting. And what I missed the most was the creativity of it and the collaboration and just getting to make something that I really loved. That I really miss and I'm like always striving to get projects going that recapture that feeling. And the people that worked on the show were all still friends and it was just a really good group of people, and you know, we had so much fun and we didn't know what we were doing.

And live TV was really really scary.

I mean, I'll never for the rest of my life forget that first show and them counting down, yeah to going live and in the TRL studio in Times Square, Like I could not have ever imagined something so insane happening in my life.

And wait, can you tell us what you were thinking as the guy was like in five four?

Right?

So, like we had done a rehearsal and that was all fun.

And then like we had planned, like Nicky and I, you know, we came out in bathrobes before we were in our full wardrobe to greet the audience and say hi and like get them dancing and like saying you know, and I was like so choked up the amount of screaming and my it just like when we came out, I was like, oh my god, this is electron. And then we go backstage and like we get all dressed up and it's just like, I mean, I am just fully adrenaline pumping, and like she and I are like staring.

We did this wonder Woman pose thing.

Where you stand and like and we was, you know, staring at each other like confidence pos and that works.

That really works for.

People, I mean really and you're like and we were standing, we were in high heels and like it was the prettiest I've ever looked.

In my life.

And it just you know, we went out there and then we're standing behind the desk.

And you know it's, uh, there's people running around and you know, and the guys doing that five four and I'm right before they'd start the countdown.

Nikki leaned over and was like do it for Van. And Van was this.

Really high up guy at Viacom that we had never met that would give notes.

And we were just like, whoever, Van is, do it for Van. That's as she said.

And then like we said that every week from then on we would go do it for Van. And then and then like you know, it starts and like you know, we had a couple little flubs, you know with the like I think Nikki cursed or somethody said shit or something like that.

Live and MTV was like, do that again.

It was real exciting.

Did they have like a radio delay? Did they have like a radio delay button? Were they?

I think there was a five second delay. But because we were past the you know.

In the beginning, the Jimmy Kimmel, Jimmy Kimmel was live. Jimmy Kimmel Live was live like that first year or two, and no comedian did well on it like that. It is also they had you come out on a catwalk to the right of the states, so the audience had to wrench the next to look at your profile or they just ignored you, and I, uh, before I went out, They're like, well, super Dave Osborne's going a little long with the mystery box or whatever they were doing. Can

I mean, you know, they were like, obviously don't do that a lot, but like they loved the like we're going to get in trouble type vibe, and they were, you know, some of the what ended up happening is we had to tape a lot of the interviews with celebrities and stuff ahead of time because they wouldn't want to come, and so you know, it was mainly me and Nikki being live and uh, you know, I don't remember anything happening that was like oh fuck, you know,

A good staff.

But like also we had between dress rehearsal and the show, we would sit there and change the script so much that it was really stressful, like to then get your head on and go, Okay, we're not doing it that way anymore, and we're you know, I look back and I'm like, wow, my brain was really That's probably why I loved it so much, is because like everything was being stimulated and challenged. And how long did you guys do that? We only did two seasons. We had twenty five episodes total.

That's not even enough. We got to figure something out. Your probably figuring it out.

That is a lot, but well it's so at the time we were like, that's not enough time for us to figure it out.

You should have you shouldn't cancel us so quick.

Yeah, But now I'm like, we had a million episodes compared to most shows that get like six sure, you know, but we we also did a lot of other stuff for MTV on air, and so it was just a lot in one year, a lot of experience and.

Just such a good time.

Is that did Scott work on your husband work on I don't know Scott, but he didn't work on it.

He was like, you know, we always talk about how that was a really good time in our relationship too when we're trying to.

Be like how do we get back to that?

You know, like, because he was like we were a team, you know, he was like supporting me through it, and you ha.

Been with him for a deck and how long have you been with him?

Ten years?

I guess a decade? Look at me. Yeah, happy anniversary is what I meant to say.

Well, and then he he sold a show a couple of years ago with Rory Scovell and.

Wait the Robbie.

I love Robbie.

Yeah, and he's done. Scott directed all his Rory specials and things and and so wow, like he had his turn to have his like big dreams come true. And so I was like it was just a like, you know, We're starting to realize how rare those moments are and no matter what happens, even if it doesn't last or it doesn't go the way you thought, like, how to appreciate them and how I was literally before we were recording, I was working on my own.

Podcast, The Shape or Shake Down, Check it Out.

I was working on a little audio sketch which will hopefully be out tomorrow. But about the three easy steps of selling a TV show, it's.

Not that easy. I can go through all like step one B, one C.

One D one E like he's going like, because I think people think it's a much simpler process than it is. And also just how many steps there are that things can go wrong, and it's part of why it's so hard, yeah, to get one on it, and it's usually right in the end. I mean, Robbie Robbie was Rory and Scott show went all the way, you know, they got picked up to series, they shot the whole thing, and then Comedy Central was like where, We're not sure.

That's why I just watched it on YouTube, but to me it was a comedy. There's plenty of reminders they.

They premiered the I mean, nowadays, what difference. Does it make like they premiered it on the channel, Yeah, and then they put on YouTube.

That's how they do everything.

Now.

Yeah, nobody who watched it cared, But financially it would sucked because there's union stuff that comes into play, where like if it doesn't air on TV, you don't get as much money.

Like a second, second, third, or fourth check. Yeah yeah YouTube. But oh man, it was so good. Everyone was I love.

Thank you.

It was Scott, thank you, thank me, motherfucker.

I love her. He's so funny.

Oh, Sarah, will you And I know this is a total like Aunt Carol thing to do, but one of my favorite bits of all time.

Oh I know what it is? Do you?

No?

Oh?

I thought you were going to make her scream? Okay, sorry, no, no, okay, sorry.

No, it was it's the story you told.

I saw you tell it meltdown one time about the time that you uh had to go to the bathroom in line at the grocery store.

I haven't thought about that in a long time. Yeah.

The story is basically long story short. I had to pee so bad that I was like, it's so I've never had to pee that bad, And I thought I and This is what makes the story so funny is that I thought if I let a little bit out that like just like you know, because I explained in the joke, like women, you know, a little bit of pea comes out like all the time, like when you sneeze or you.

Like, like a couple of drops come out.

Like men don't. Really, I don't think they experience that the way women do.

And always make my sister laugh, tell sheps, she's so easy to make pee.

You just let a little bit out.

And then I would like thought I could stop it, and then I couldn't stop it. And so I'm literally I'm not exaggerating. I was paying and just peeing my like and it was and I thought like, oh, it'll absorb into my pants, But it went straight out the bottom of my pants like I didn't realize, Like it just flows down like a hose.

I collected on the floor. It's being mark.

So I like, I'm so shamed, but I just walked away. Nothing that happened.

Well, if you're peeing, you gotta start walk and you can't just stand in a puddle all that.

It's my favorite, wasn't it in them? It was in New York right at It.

Was in New York in Clinton Hill, like at this little grocery store.

It was the one I always went to.

And that's like the end of the joke is like I'm like, well, you know in a way, and now it really.

Was my grocery store because I marked it. Like I.

Just remember standing in the back of the melto.

I think because as a kid, I was always like I always had to the bathroom.

My sister said to take me to the bathroom.

Ping was always like a thing and just a person telling a story of like I really had to pee and then I just be.

So that's why it's like I wasn't drunk or something, and it wasn't like a crazy party night.

It was like broad daylight like and I chose to be. But I really was, like.

I thought I was going to pass out, like like after I've heard all these people's stories about how people pissed themselves, and one guy told me, he goes, oh, I know what happens when you don't pee when you really have to, You faint and then you pee. No yeah, he said he passed out all like had a urinal one time, like because he had to have held it in too long, and he like fell down like as he was peeking, and he was like, Oh, that's what happens.

Eventually your body forces the issue.

I would love it if you'd like lightly fainted too. The business man standing at the ural urinal next to his not here, not here, he's like, I know that happens.

When people see.

It, it's very impressive. I'm known to give people the vapors.

So, Sarah, your podcast, it's basically you in this closet. Is this your main closet?

Yeah, this is my closet. These are my clothes.

Well, it's great for absorbing. That's the sound prisons a.

Little like Scott and I made a little makeshift desk that folds down and I have it all neatly figured out. But uh, my podcast is just me talking, and it's mainly like stuff about crafting and gardening and like my hobbies and then and then probably sixty percent me bitching about the comedy industry.

People. If we come come to accept that, that's part of the deal.

If you're gonna listen, yeah, right, well, now that you're a booker, yeah you gotta.

Yeah, yeah, get in the mix.

Right when done, right after we're done, recording. I'm going to see if I'm one of the tiny headshots.

You're not.

Oh no, it's okay. I don't do a lot of club work these days.

Well, it's mostly women except two men.

It's not a woman's only club. It's just whoever's the best?

Yeah, yeah, nice one the wall. Who put on the wall? I had to be Carrot Top.

It's Carrot Top and Jeff Dunham are the two men? Yours it is? Oh, that's funny. That's the other guy.

Yeah, you gotta book the big Vegas guys, the big guys.

Yeah.

Well, because I was trying to recreate the experience of when you're a female comedian and you go to a club and you.

Look around at the headshots and you're looking, you're scanning for the women.

Yeah, and you only find like two and it's two women that you're like, I am nothing like her, no judgment.

But you're just like, or maybe some judgment, but like.

You're always judging.

Oh, that's who they chose as the token women.

I don't you just it makes you feel like you don't belong there because you're you're trained to compare yourself only to the other women and not to the men, and so I just was like, I'm gonna do this and then put two men and then make the men squirm when they go. I've actually like experienced like some friends coming over looking at it and just being look like giving me a blank stare when I tell them about who's on the wall and they're like, like, you don't.

Have to understand, it's not for you.

I always it's kind of a bummer when you play the belly room at the Comedy Store, the only room I do there, but it used to be a women comedian only room, and so all the hedge and you don't there'll be like Felicia Michaehlzer. You know, there's yeah, known people, but there's so many comics on that wall, and there's so many old headshots and it's really fun to watch. But when I'm in there, I'm like, I don't belong here.

Why am I?

It's like, I don't know, it's the Yeah, I don't.

Feel like I belong there either. I don't. I don't know.

Yeah, there's more to it than just the headshots. Yeah, I just don't belong there because I.

Think it's all the murdered souls in the base yes, it's all the murder. None of us belong there except for Satan. Yes, let meant through all these.

Does pretty funny women to impress.

You have to impress Satan or you'll never make it at at the comedy store.

I mean Satan, he books the original room. But what I like his work in the main room.

Because yeah, yeah, the origine room's kind of his room.

Yeah, And what else do you want to plug, Sarah? Anything pressing, anything you need to discuss with us before we go.

I would say right now, yeah, I recommend peeing when you have to go.

Yes, but check out my podcast Shape or Shakedown.

But I also just this is not related to me at all. I recommend a document I'm really into fungus, Like I think that funga it will save the world, and it's just an incredible living organism.

And obviously millions is different species.

But I'm really into gardening, and so I've been learning about fungus and like back, you know, microbes.

In the soil and all this shit.

And I read a book Entangled Life, which was like very sciencey, very nerdy and detailed. But now there's a

And I'm micro doing well yeah micros.

I've never done shrooms, but I'm like want, I really want to, but there are.

No people that claim to have gotten well from doing that. Yeah, you're lithum and stuff.

They're in the final phases of the clinical trials cool for psychedelic drug treatment for mental health, and I mean they're saying that it's so promising that it is literally curing PTSD, Yeah, curing depression and those things, and like, you know, I think in our lifetime we will see it. It's already happening. But yeah, I'm and like mushrooms can like get rid of toxic waste and they can uh like be part of materials that are renewable. I mean, it's just endless. I love them so much and they

That's a great And then she takes a huge swing of kombucha and I'll prove it to you.

And that's why I want you check out Shaper's booch.

That's a double plug. Is she double plug?

I can't wait to try that booch.

That booch.

Well, I want to watch Fantastic Fungo.

There's just will warn you.

There's one guy who's like a big part of it that by the end you're like, all right, buddy, shut the fuck up.

But he's very lovable.

It just reminds me of the scene in Ghostbusters where Annie Potts it's like, do you have any hobbies? And he's like, I collect sports molds and fungus. And I always thought that guy. Yeah, that guy, You're gone. I love it. Thank you for being on our pot Thank.

You for having me. You guys are delightful. Yeah, great to talk to you.

I hope you see you again soon. We're all gonna start doing comedy right sure after this third wave of ska music. Yeah, yeah, thanks for uh and yeah, happy anniversary ten years.

Yeah, thank you, thanks man, thanks for remembering.

Of course, of course the basket of fruit is coming. You've been listening to Do you need a Ride? D y n A R R Oh?

I stepped on your ar.

I don't think I want that.

I'm sorry.

I was doing it like a backup singer. Are you leaving?

I you wanna way back home?

Either way, we want to be there. Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim. Give us time and a tourmanal Engabe. We want to send you off install. We want to welcome you back home.

Tell us all about it.

We scared? Or was it fine? Malcoorn? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need with Karen and Chris.

Sarah, I'm going to count to three and we're going to clap on four, one, two, three.

Best clap ever it really was.

Don't that feel good? It just feels good