S2 - Ep. 22 - Q&A Episode

Are you leaving?

I you wanna way back home?

Either way, we want to be there. Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us time and aid, termino and gage. We want to send you off InStyle. We wanna welcome you back home.

Tell us all about ity scared?

He was it fine?

Malborn.

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

With Karen and Chris? And we're off, welcome to Do you need a ride? This is Chris.

Fairbank and this is Karen Kilgareff.

I don't usually say and we're off, but we just started driving, so it seemed appropriate.

And we really were off to the races.

The horse ones. I'm gonna put all my money on the one with the biggest ball.

Chris, I told you you need to pay the rent.

No, I'm going to get out of this trouble with horse race, swimmings, triple down. The only reason I said the balls thing is David Hasselhoff was at the horse race. It's the one time I saw him. It looked like he had been wrestling in the grass. He was wearing his sear sucker suit. Yes, there was dry grass in his hair. He was drunk. He looked like he was having fun. After that, I liked him. But someone said, how do you know what christ to bet on? And he said, just look at the balls, and so I did.

Of course they have clamps or something.

You're thinking of the rodeo.

Oh, I'm always thinking. I think it's because I like Garth Brooks so much.

But I did do it based on ball size, and that my horse won I one way.

Really yeah, one hundred bucks or something.

Well, congratulations, So you did make rent that month?

I did, And that's when you got bitten by the bug and you can't stop gambling.

My rent was only one hundred dollars. I was living in a closet with twelve other at at a nunnery.

I have good news for you, Chris, Oh do you I've not only started doing stand up again.

Oh that's great news.

That is I'm very happy to hear that, thank you, but also with Andy Wood and Brian Cook, they just asked me to do some show that they're doing where they have to do a bunch of go gos covers.

That's why I was listening to that song.

Is it called Guilty Pleasures?

No, it's something else, and it's some it said, I'm not gonna be able to remember the club name.

It's an Eagle Rock. I think whoa.

Yeah, no friend, no friends, curious choice to just go strictly. Maybe that was I'm starting to feel like they were that was an emergency.

No, I think that was dumbness for sure.

I'm really happy to hear that you're doing stand up. Uh back to that me too.

I'm I mean, I don't really have anything to say per se, but we're working on that part. But I'm also excited just because it's like a chance as opposed to their comedy show. This is like an actual music some kind of a music show they're doing, and so they just need a girl to sing, go Go. So that's the thing I kind of like because it's almost like being in a band, but just.

For the one show for five songs.

I want to go to that show.

I'll tell you about all about it after, Okay, cool, and if other people want to know, we'll put it somewhere.

Do we have a website, right website? Yeah, we also have a page on the exactly right.

Yes, So I'll ask.

I'll ask some friend who has page access to put me on there, and.

I'm going to view the page for the first time ever.

Oh you mean you're going to be in a what do they call those, an original page viewer?

Yes, yes, yes, a first time voyeur of the interway.

I almost said, imagine that bringing a comedy level down that load it started.

Okay, so this the exciting thing about this episode. It's the it's the long awaited, finally being delivered Q and A episode.

I have a feeling a lot of questions came in because I wasn't even looking for them, and I saw it at long like a hundred Oh okay.

I will say I think we got over.

I think over two hundred questions on Instagram, probably one hundred on Twitter, and I think like ten on Facebook.

So that's true. We're up in the three fifties if your math serves.

Me answer all of that. Yes, we'll only take a few hours.

We're not getting out of this car until every question is answered thoroughly.

But first, are we done with our chit chat, small talk.

Oh, do you have some chit chat? I was done.

I'm done.

Did you want to tell your gogo's anecdote?

No, I believe I have. I think I have in the past. It was more about Milanda Carlisle.

It didn't sound it didn't sound familiar.

Well, on sixth grade. I gained on about the year of sixth grade. Upon sixth grade, I had a lady friend and my sister said I should give her a Blinda carr while ep that she already had and along without a cake, and I put it. I don't know how I got into her locker, but I put a cake in there, and she came and threw her books in there, and I landed on.

The cake and the cake burst everywhere.

And I do think I've told this because she was thinking about breaking.

Up with me. But it was like a nice thing to do. What other sixth grade kids are giving away cakes and records?

Well, that's just it. I think the cake.

Thing really came out of left field. Yes for me in this story, I'm sure I have not heard the story before.

It was a piece of the cake.

Maybe I ate some of the cake too, because shortly after that at the fair. I was on the teacups with Ross and Andy. They're forgiving me. They're my friends now. But I threw up. Oh right as she was coming around the corner and she saw me. I was wearing a terrible outfit like this, your jams and I think some red suspenders that I was just hanging down casually. Oh, it was all that culmination. She's just like, we got a.

Call, quake, it's too much. Is this guy is out of control?

Yes?

And I know that was a repeat. Don't tell me I repeated it. It's just still in my head.

I have to.

But I swear.

I love that your sister was trying to give you, like dating advice when.

She always did.

Yeah, but she was making you do it like giving a Giving a girl a cake in sixth grade is very like you live up in the haller in nineteen twenty.

Yeah. Yeah, I present you with this cake not a whole time.

I think it was a slice. I went to a wedding and also stole this record. Here you go, kid, I saved.

You a piece of cake I put in the freezer for five years. You know you can have it.

Oh yeah, it was an Elaine Venice wedding cake. Oh but h I probably.

Would end it anyway. I think her whole family moved away.

Oh that's probably why she's like, I gotta have a reason, otherwise it'd start a life with this kid.

Yeah, she's like long distance junior high relationships do not work.

They really don't.

They don't.

Someone ends up picking their nose. Someone else writes a note about it. You find the note in the playground says, I sure do like Chris Fairbaks, but he too bad he picks his nose.

Oh this seems real.

No, just an example, just an example life.

Contract, just a random example of pain, Just one thing I thought of based on experience. Whops, okay, should we do? Should we ask some questions? Now here's wait really quick. Sorry I asked the question that I interrupted myself. But I was thinking almost habitually, of going to the same drive through Starbucks. But then, is that weird that we're going to the same strive through Starbucks where the girl recognized me last time?

Right?

And then it's all of a sudden thing where you're kind of stalking a fan which hasn't happened.

And she can't move because she's she's stuck inside Starbucks. I'm the one that's going at her. Yeah, Cindy, I believe her name was.

It's up to you. I have my cold brew in hand, oh that I've had. Oh, you got yours, So everything's fine. Well, I you know, I was ready to go earlier, and I'm like, what do I do with my time? Let's get caffeinated because I, Oh, here's something that happened to day. The reason I had to take a nap. Little things stressed me on I gotta lay down my pretty head. My gas got turned off right when my friend came to stay on my beautiful couch. Oh and money for

I never thought it was part of my rent.

Oh yeah, and it finally got turned off.

But I just set up a new account.

I went through some con concierge service that set up everything for you. It was like set up by the city and this is a cool one stop shop. Apparently gas wasn't part of it, and I so it finally got shut off. But I've had free gas.

For seven months.

Yeah, free gas.

That's kind of great.

Yeah.

Some really old lady that used to live in your apartment, has been paying your like floating you on gas this whole time.

Yeah, totally, And.

I'm gonna I'm going to roll the dice and go to Starbucks.

Whoa, whoa? What is it about about driving anymore?

Makes Is it the size it light of the cars that makes it horrifying?

It's that I was definitely in the wrong, but then that person was also in the wrong.

I just was trying to sneak in.

Yeah.

The problem is, I think, and I'm pretty sure this is the case. If you slam into someone from behind.

It's over. It's your fault. There is no question unless you've.

Talked about horrorhand and find out that that's what you're both into.

What were we talking about?

What do we talk about beforehand?

Ah? She looks familiar, I think, Yeah.

She looks like an actress, Stephen. Do you want a latte?

Oh? I'm going to do the pumpkin cream cold brew? Oh? Okay, the new one? What size? Just grunde?

Should I got my necklace caught in this? Free's falling for Hi?

Can I get a grande a pumpkin cold brew latte?

Is that right?

That's right? And can I get a triple tall one pump Mocha triple tall one?

Pa? Did you want no?

Thanks?

Ay?

That's all nine?

Thank you?

No, I think it's her. Hey, Stephen, can you hand me.

Quick? Do we have any fake mustaches you can wear? But not just three detectives here? Yeah?

Actually, just hand me the whole thing because I'm gonna see it.

There's so embarrassing.

I'm yeah, I'm gonna look the other way. I'm gonna pretend this wall is really interesting? Is that two different types of brick?

I I have a sticker for a few months? Oh yeah?

Is that your we below patch?

Okay, okay, okay, okay, all right, okay, enough jokes.

Please, I beg you.

Oh this is from Anna back given Karen, Stephen and Chris enjoy some coffee.

Oh cool, Hi, it's a cool word.

I don't know how much is on that?

Was that a little dog on a skateboard?

Yes?

It's so thoughtful. She chose that because.

You're actually good to go. Do you want to receive? Sure? Thanks?

Because I skateboard and Steven's dad skateboards.

Right.

Yeah, so you look super familiar. I'm like, do you listen to my favorite murder?

Yes?

Yeah, I'm from that. Hi. Hi, how are you? I'm good? What's your name? My name is Brianna. Hi, Brianna. Nice to meet you. Oh did it mean to be staring at you so hard?

That's okay, no problem, okay, Hi.

Whoa Okay, cool right out? Okay, thanks?

Wait is that a different it's a different girl. That's a different girl. You're huge at this start.

I'm so embarrassed. We can't come back here now. Hi, I'm good at you. We were just driving to and I'm like, I'm so embarrassed.

It's gonna look like I'm trying to get Sinny to be like saying hi to me again.

Yes, thank you, beautiful, thank you, Yes.

I heard Hi.

Yes him mark you today.

I'm really excited to meet you. Oh thank you.

Do you listen to no, you know you have to listen. I have to listen to you.

Guys are making a big they're making a big deal about it, like I'm talking to celebrity.

Yeah right, right, right, a celebrity you don't know?

Yeah, exactly.

Well, nice to meet you.

Yeah, this is now my favorite Starbucks, my favorite star.

That was it? That was fun? Know right? I know?

Damn stuff I'm going to give this to Cindy.

But then the other girl will feel sad.

I know, I'll give her this one.

Okay, cool, it's the only.

Good.

I thank you so much. You know what, I was going to give you this.

I was going to give you this sticker last time, because I stick stuff in my person other people give us, so you guys split those amongst yourselves.

Nice to meet you, she said your thing to you.

That's so crazy that it was another girl.

God, I'm so fair because both times I can't say their faces they're right above the window.

Yeah, and she just seemed to have different arms. That's like they look they were kind of similar. Like I think they could be cousins, you know what I mean. They look similar. They have dark hair. They both have dark hair. They both had great eyeshadow.

What if you applied for a job at that Starbucks and on the application a side said, what do you feel about my favorite murder?

Are you at least open? Because the manager was open.

He was like, he was into the enthusiasm of the whole situation.

That's how he barely got the job by the skin of his teeth.

That's why we like Markt.

The manager not a listener, but you do have all these Starbucks experience required.

Yes you're hired.

That was I rolled the dice and now I'm even more embarrassed than I was last time. Guys, I swear to God, I'm not trying to get attention dine our listeners.

Wait a second, they're filming. Should we go around the block?

No?

No, it's okay. That's that's actually I think Kyle Walker.

He's a pro skateboarder.

Serious, yeah, don't you you? Guys, we just drove by skateboard a skateboarder.

Being filmed, I know, and I got excited like a Starbucks employee.

I'm not going to be the one that goes Hi.

I almost buy your shoes, but they came in the uh forest green, and I'm more of a black shoe guy.

I feel so dumb right.

Now, I'm going to drive buy on honk Right as he tries to get the lift off.

Are you gonna are you gonna do a tail slide and kick flip out of it?

I know you like that trick.

What's his name? Mark?

I think that's Kyle Walker.

Sorry, I was thinking about with.

Walker Ryan, another skateboarder. He goes the same physical therapists. Just me, Oh Walker, Ryan, Yes, don't.

Try this, Ranger, don't try to name drop and fold into skateboarders and don't apply.

I know these are all lost, these are new skaters.

I like that the look of that guy. He was rangey, what you'd call rangey.

He was focused too.

Yeah.

I think that was the look of a guy that was about just about to stick his trick.

Yeah.

He and he had to because that cameraman was squatting down.

There with all his might, all four wheels down, feed on the bolts.

That's how he was going to roll away.

Kyle Walker, Okay, should we focus on our show?

Sorry? Sorry? Yes, yes, of course, I mean me too.

Oh there's some kind of a street the situation.

Yes. Oh there's guacamole in a parking spot.

I love it. I'm loving it.

Vape goat that last time?

Yeah? Did we?

I think?

Did we? I don't remember, but I do. It does bring to jah vous to say I don't like it.

Wait, I just realized, Stephen, I didn't, did you? I should have said that, Stephen? Did I say that last time?

Yes?

I did?

Yes to the first girl, Okay, good to Cindy. Yeah, because this time okay.

And also you have your new hair.

She might not have recognized.

Oh yeah, yeah, she's like, is that Scrilloks?

It looks like a mohawk a little bit. It does really for it to look like that, but it really does.

Well, that's because it's the hair in the middle of your head. But you're pirting it, you're parting it.

So did you get it cut Stephen or did you do it yourself?

Oh? I could never cut own hair, and I got it cut okay.

Yeah, yeah, that was not a slam. I really because you I thought you were talking about like I.

Mean, it seems really freeing. If you were to ever just like take a buzz of your head, that seems so freeing. But I don't think I could ever have done it.

Many times really, it's given me nothing. Well cool, now I don't have to say a twenty six blocks. It's funny.

Did you cut that yourself or did you get it on a rocky boat.

Or did you go down to the blind barber?

No, no, it looks good though, it looks good.

Cool. I'm not being mean at all.

It looked terrible on me or like someone at anyone else, but you good good on you.

All right, Okay, stop it, I'm nervous. Look, we're going to never get to these questions. We'll just write as we start. Move on.

Does anyone mean anything from Starbucks?

I decided I do want a beverage.

Well, if we're going to start with a question, I really like this one that's from at Summer day Dreams, like some like Midsommar on Twitter because it's a classic question but with a diner spin.

Great, what dead celebrity would you like to give a ride to? And why?

Okay?

Oh all right boy. So now when there's the thinking process.

Yeah, yeah, we get to talk through what our ideas could be.

Or you could have a first opinion that a second choice.

Could it be a celebrity that's dying and we're actually taken to the hospital so they can live longer. I would like to be a Mine would be a freshly shot John Lennon.

Sorry that's terrible, but.

Any of the Beatles I will stick with that.

Paul McCartney even he was delightful on James Cordon uh in.

A car Paul McCartney because he did the singing.

Yeah, it was singing a bit. It made me.

I guess I'll just that'll be my answer, just because I didn't have time to. But he was so delightful. And they went to Liverpool and they drove around his town. He was so excited to point out his childhood home and they stopped there and the woman that lived there was freaking out, and he's like, here's.

Why I wrote she loves you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, in this little tiny bathroom and my dad, he said. His dad was like, it's it's a little American, how about she loves you? Yes, yes, yes.

It was very He was so funny. I mean, so, I don't know, I don't know.

I'm just gonna say, Paul McCartney, I'm I'm, I'm I'm pedestrian.

I like the Beatles.

Okay, it was supposed to be a dead celebrity. So do you want to wait till he's dead?

No?

Nuts, So I guess we have to kill him?

Nuts?

I did, Well, you go next. I'll tell them my second answer.

I think it would be funny. Let's see.

Oh, I guess the first person that came to mind is Madeline Kahn. I think she'd be really fun in the car and funny and hilarious and great.

And can she be any age because I mean she I mean not to be ageus, but young her boy really does.

Something from a midsect. I listen, I really I really like her.

I think, yes, young Madeline Cohn is gorgeous, but I have to say she did she.

Aged perfectly, Yes she did.

She was just a gorgeous woman her whole life.

Not to make you wrong, no, no I am wrong to say it.

You get your preferences, but I'm just saying I think, also, you can look at her older and be like, hell, yeah.

I'm going to change it to older because she was funnier and we'd be laughing more. What am I going to wrench my neck around just to look at her young face every I'll hurt myself.

I just want to hear her old funny voice. Flame, Oh Madeline.

Yeah, she'd be my pick.

Okay, well then, because it'll be. And because I worship him, I'll just say, Gene Wilder. I think he's the sweetest man and he the Everything he's ever done makes me happy. And when he died, I was sadder than most people were, or not sadder, but I was sad like most people were.

When like he's my David Bowie. That's all I'm saying.

I get it.

And David Bowie is also my Gene Wilder. It's a weird coincidence.

They can't be themselves for you, it's something happened.

It's like a weird masquerade party.

And now have I told this story on do You Need to Ride?

When my dad was a San Francisco fireman, they got called up to a hotel saying that for a movie shoot they needed they were the closest firehouse and they needed to bring of San Francisco fire truck up there for shoots.

Okay, and they were.

Shooting the movie The Lady in Red, Oh yeah, and Jean Wilder was the director. So when my dad was the lieutenant that day that day and when he got out of the fire truck, he was walking over to talk to whoever was there, and Geen Wilder was walking toward him in.

A raincoat, looking exactly like Geene Wilder, and my dad.

Stopped and went, Hey, it's Willy walka so terrific. Oh that's great, And then he said he had a nice conversation with Jean Wilder, who was completely lovely and didn't get mad that my dad called him Willy walk in and it was great and he was really excited.

Yeah, he's just the best.

Yeah.

Can we have Gilda Adner in the car too? What if they're all together?

Oh my god? And then when then we drive to New York City?

Oh, just off Broadway or on Broadway? Even better?

I think they could make it on Broadway.

Okay, next question, Next question, they could have Instagram at rust Bag. That's Rustbag with two s's and two g's. What was Kareny Chris's first car?

Oh? Nice?

Mine was an eighty four Escort Wagon maroon with a pink pinstripe on it.

Did you get that detailed yourself?

No, it came that way and oddly, I'm not kidding. When we went to pick it up for four hundred dollars, the man who had painted it and worked on it was in a wheelchair and he said he fell and hurt his neck while fixing up that car. So of course I bought it.

He fell off a curb and he said, yeah, I hit my He was like a fire hydrant or a a some kind of a metal box.

It was awful.

My dad was like, while you were working on this car, He's like, yeah, So do you want it?

Yes? Do you have any other cars? Anything we can do?

Oh?

No, awful? Yeah, I mean that's kind of a bummer. But Dad applies to them.

It's a true we're looking for true anecdotes.

It was. It was a great car, did me well?

I liked it. That man is sweeping the gutter.

I was so excited to put a giant public Enemy sticker on the.

Back of it.

Let's see my first car.

We I guess technically it would be the car that my dad let me drive the most, because it was really his car. And he reminded me of that often, especially when I put ram stickers on it.

They get really mad.

It was a yellow seventy one Volkswagen Bug or Beetle, I think from that time, and it was pale yellow and I loved it.

I loved driving.

A stick in San Francisco, which was very difficult to do.

Oh wow, And.

Often I blew it up driving to Sacramento one time because I never.

Put oil in once.

That's what a lot of kids do.

Yeah, And my dad told me all the time, make sure you put oil in it, and check it and do it.

My dad told my sister about her Folkswagon boss a car I put stickers on, thinking it would be my first car, but then it was sold promptly before I got my license.

Was I not bitter get sold because she blew it up?

No?

I think there was some mechanical issue. And then whoever he sold it to was a savvy mechanic fixed it up and then it was driven around town flaunted before him for ten years.

Yeah, and the curtains where they're same, and I'm like, that's my boss.

Well, this car I really loved and one of my favorite memories. And it was my friend Lisa Lanyon told me that on our way home from a bar one night, you're the best drunk driver.

I trust you the most of anybody drug driving. And I was like, thanks so much.

Yeah, you driving drunk up and down the streets of San fran with on a stick on a manual transmission.

That's why you are driving now.

I feel like I have amazing training.

Anyone that's good at driving, assume that they're past alcoholic or current.

They might be drunk. Right now, we're all over current.

Okay, Next question yes at phrase pr on Instagram. Simple question new car smell or pine tree hanging air freshener smell.

Ah, I'm a pine man, you know me.

I have an oddly outdoors a bedroom and sure into a cabin.

That's right, it's chemicals either way.

I like to be reminded of the outdoors as I breathe in fragrant carcinogens.

I think I'm new car smell because I don't like I don't like those car air fresheners.

I think they're too strong.

I think I've a very strong sense of smell myself, no brag. So when people have those, or they have like the glade plugins glued to the wall of their car or whatever. I always like anytime I get into a if a town car picks me up or something like that, I'm always rolling the window down.

You're always getting picked up in town cars.

Look you heard the girls at Starbucks. I'm a town car level person.

They do give little directions though, where you just snip a little corner in the top of the tree and just gradually poke it out, if you just rip the plastic off and you go full tree stink city.

Right, And so many people do that. I think people do it. Do you remember Arch.

Parker's joke where he was really stoned, and they said, I'm just gonna pull over by that tree over there.

But it was his the Pine Tree Review.

Mayor No, but God's funny.

He's the funniest.

Okay, next question, all right, this is from Jessica on Facebook.

How did you guys decide to do this podcast originally?

Oh?

Yeah, we've talked about that a little, but I don't know if we originally were told independently of each other. If I'm not mistaken that we should do a podcast together, right, Jo Pardo and maybe Great told me yes, And I was like, what's the podcast? And then you were probably like, who's Chris Fairbaks. I'm kidding, but I knew you.

I knew you.

We knew each other.

I've been stucking you from a Starbucks window since the beginning. Uh and uh, we were, yeah, we were going to do an Alzheimer's podcast since we both had similar moms situations that's happening at the same time. Basically, yeah, but we still talked about that enough.

I'm glad that wasn't like, yeah, we realized like at first we were gonna do it in alzheimer Our moms are dying of Alzheimer's podcast together.

So it's fun.

Right, there were good times and we were going to call it before we forget.

And then uh, and then we thought of, uh, I can't I can't remember did I think did I think you just said it?

One day?

Did we drive around go to the airport pick up comics? I'm like, yeah, yeah, that's better because and you know why, I want to dangerous.

And then I was like, no, I'm really good at screaming at cars as I crashed into the perfect perfect. But I thought of that idea because my aunt Kathleen Castro, who has since passed away and I miss her terribly. They used to live by the San Francisco airport, so anytime we would have to take a flight or came home from a flight, my Aunt Kathleen would pick us up or drop us off. And it meant everything to me. Like even when I was in my early twenties and

Like I just liked that idea and everyone did appreciate it. Unfortunately, the shared ride app thing, it's just made it.

It is im po. I picked up my friend the other day.

Without Sons podcast and it was I mean, the line was out.

It goes into the city.

Yeah, you can't. You can't get really into Lax anymore. Also because they're doing all that construction. Like I think if they rebuild it and we'll start going back, say in three years when it's done being rebuilt, but right.

Now you can't drive in there.

And a lot of airports they have the shared red cars, go pick them up offsite or in a parking Roger somewhere, so it's separate. But yeah, but Lax is like, you don't like it, go back home. Your dreams didn't work out. Here's an eighty dollars parking ticket. Also, you were never going to be a tap dancer anyway.

Yeah.

By the way, when you get home, your parents won't be there anymore. Your bedroom is going to be rented out to some retired mailman.

Okay, next question.

Next continuation of the last question, Ukari says, love the theme song and how did that come together? Did it happen when you first started the podcast or like after you had already started recording.

No, that was the first thing we did. If not the day of our first record, didn't.

We recorded, No, but we recorded at that same guy's house.

Yeah, and you you whipped it out in no time.

I did, And you know, it's very funny.

I had a bad I had a weird dating experience that made.

Me very mad and sad, and then I.

Wrote that song and it was like not directly related, but it was like I could tell I was siphoning the feelings from that experience into what I want, like what I wanted that song to be.

If that makes sense, it does. I'm just like thinking of the lyrics trying to apply it to many.

Of my heart aches.

It was almost just like the energy of the heartache drove the idea of like get this down on paper and then like, you know, I can't really explain it.

But that does a very easy song to write.

This makes sense. Yeah.

If I look back on my relationships, some were scary, and some were fine, that's scary.

A monster with claws that was a really scary.

But his body was one of those used car floppy airmen.

Yeah, it was like if a floppy airman.

Instead of smiling and being all kooky because he doesn't know where he's going, he was a ghoul.

Yeah, I wanted to enter your soul.

Yeah.

By the way, watch Marianne on Netflix. Ohma, god, it's the best show I've ever seen.

What's it called, Marianne.

It's a series. It is like, it's a French series. So you're reading it. It's so well written, all the narration. It's like reading a book and it's kind of like, you know, it starts so scary, and then they go back to the development of these friendships and things, and that's lighthearted and funny. All the acting is amazing and they get super scary again, but it's not scary all the way through. It's it's almost like a Bollywood film or maybe it's French New Wave.

I don't know.

The lighting that it's so beautiful and the acting's great, and you just got to read and sometimes stop and rewind and read because information.

Is in them words.

But watch it if you like scary things and also are prone to crying.

Do you Does that answer your question? You, Carri, I'm sorry, I I liked it.

I'm plugging a thing.

I liked it.

It has nothing to do with me. It's so good, perfect, okay. At on Instagram at jess Lee twenty three. Has anyone gotten carsick during an episode? You know? I have?

There are times that's a good question, But there are times I'm looking down at the navigation and of course that's when you get sack.

Yeah, and I have. I have, but I've never it's never got to the point of vomiting.

Good, good, Yes, tell me if it got to the point of vomiting.

Well, it's just what if you never knew and no one ever noticed. And I have vomited on every single episode in some weird like in some secretive way. There's just some disgusting shoe box under your Sorry.

I'm like, what Chris keeps opening those little pine trees?

Yes, little pine tree size spit ups.

Yeah, that's questions not for me, because I drive, which means I don't get can't get carsick. Yeah, yeah, does everybody see that I've driven us to Alhambra? By the way apartment, it's beautiful.

Yeah, yeah, I don't need to.

I would say I'm well suited for doing this podcast because I used to read in the car all the time and I never.

Got get carsick.

So just like looking at notes, it's like no problem. Yeah.

I used to judge people if they got car sick, but I went to six Flags the other day. I got sick on just a roller coaster, or at least nauseous. I went to a cabin last week with a bunch of friends. I got altitude sickness. They all went on a hike. I just shivered in the corner. So yeah, I'm becoming a weak weak man being. I'm being weeded out. Okay, great the Elements.

You're welcome.

On Twitter at CRFP ninety seven. If you could record an episode anywhere in the world, where would you choose.

To drive around? Oh? How about somewhere I've never been Paris?

Or the autobon.

Weles an hour a good one talking.

Yeah, because you could hear the engine roaring.

Yeah, and you could hear us dying.

Yes on a real Matthew brought on the autob No.

I think he was an Ireland Oh no, sorry.

That was terrible that that happened.

It's a terrible thing, and we're sad that people die every time, every goddamn time.

It's so you were very real. Third and I just laughed.

Okay, next one.

At La Rhea says on Twitter, what's a vegetable that matter how old you get, you still hate to see on your plate.

Pea, peace, peace zucchini? Thanks for asking?

What about to what if it's a barbecue, it's a skewer or a screwer or a scooter.

You're eating it on a scooter.

I fucking hate sacchini. I hate The texture of it is horrifying. I don't understand why anyone would like the taste. It's bitter and weird.

No thing when you crawl over and have a little food out of your cat dish and turn there's one behind you.

Do you jump?

Dare you call me a chaos?

I mean like catwoman? That's a cat? Yeah? Pease.

Even when I was a kid, I just can't. And to this day, if they're in something, I'll eat, end of course, and I like split pea soup, but pease, just sitting on a plate. I will just play with them untill nine o'clock and I'm allowed to go to bed.

Okay, okay, next question?

All right.

On Instagram at that net life says, describe a time in each of your lives when you really needed a ride if it didn't have one.

Oh wow, I.

Can go first, my classic and I use this to guilt my family often.

Where the fuck are we?

It's at California University, lay in La. Yeah, kel state La. WHOA, let's sign.

Up, let's get educated.

I want to learn.

Wow. I didn't realize it was this close.

Yeah, very cool.

One time in sixth grade, I for some reason joined signed up for band. I was playing the flute in band, so I had band practice like for an hour and a half after school. And then my aunt Jean was supposed to come and pick me up, and she did not come and pick me up. So I sat in front of my grammar school from like four point thirty until six, I guess, waiting for someone to come and

And I was just like, yeah, can I use the phone?

Like no one came to pick me up and was like hold on a second, like they had to get permission. And then they were like here it is, and they walked me the hallway phone like making sure I wasn't going to go anywhere else.

In the house. It was so odd.

Yeah, I was disappointed by every adult in my family that day.

Man, mind's a similar sy well, just being disappointed by people that it's their job to take care that.

Yeah.

I when I lived in.

Oregon, Mount Bachelor, I I went off a jump and hurt myself very bad. I think I was even knocked out for a minute, but I had broken my ankle. My knees had bent the wrong way and they were swollen.

And I broke my thumb.

Like it was a bad I hit a big piece of ice that I didn't see because the light was flat and I was in at the top of Mount Bachelor in the it's a live, active volcano. Actually it's scary. Steam shoots out of little hold. Yeah, it's it's ready to blow at any moment. But I the SKA patrol would not come and get me because I was off the ski area boundary. So I crawled out of there with my snowboard in my hand and a broken ankle and crawled out until I was at the top of

Yeah, you were off site. They didn't care at all.

Did they help you then?

Yeah, they gave me a ride down. At that point, I just wanted to ride in a sled. Yeah, yeah, out of there, but they wouldn't do it.

Oh they did know.

My friends went to ask them, and I was just laying there and it was getting cold.

And the sun was going nice.

But I mean I'm saying, once you crawled out, did they help you down the mountain?

Yes?

Oh okay. They then let me get on the chair lift.

And they weren't just punitive to be dicks.

I was. It's given rides all the way up to that point.

The last one a Greyhound back in Montana.

Oh god, that you know what? That was a pretty emotional question.

Okay, follow this up with a fun one on Facebook at rachelle What are your favorite road trip snacks besides coffee, assuming that it's part of your favorite road trip snack, Well.

It definitely is my favorite road trip snack.

I I like a good bag of.

Im. I'm a boring like trail makes guy.

Oh you are sesame seeds and raisins, all the stuff that you want to pick through.

I can't.

That's it's I always grab it just out of habit or jerky chew shredded beef jerky that you stick in your lip and pretend you're chewing.

It's a childhood toy. It's like a candy cigarette of the other cancer.

Yeah, and I and I still get it sometimes because it's like a salty treat.

That's in your mouth.

I didn't.

I thought they only made big league chew and then realize Jerky came in chew form.

Also, yeah, yeah, it's in a little can. So you feel like a grown up.

Oh awesome, you feel like a grown up truck driver.

I guess I would say wrote when I like, when I go to drive up to San Francisco, drive up to my family's house, I do the drive through. I do the drive through Starbucks because it's super convenient. You can you obviously get out and use the restroom. But then they have like you can not eat the terrible food.

You know what I mean. You can get your.

Coffee, you can stay caffeinated, you can stay jacked up so you can do your driving. Yeah, but then you can also, you know, have what the shepherd's lunch I think they call it, which is like cheese and apples or whatever.

Like you can kind of do whatever you want.

I like a good shepherd's pie. I think it's an official change of subject. No, but that's that is delicious. Yeah, I make a good shepherd's pie. Oh really, it's not really a pie. It's just potatoes with some sort of a meat.

It's a you know what the easiest way to do it is.

You do your meat, and you do a can of tomato paste, and then you do you get some French green beans that are seasoned, it'll stay seasoned on the front, and you.

Throw those in.

You brown that ground beef, and then you put the tomato paste and the seasoned green beans in there, mix it all together, stick it in them like a casserole dish.

What about in the oven?

Oh, I'm gonna do a little lower than that.

Maybe I like it crispy, and you can put your firstly made mashed potatoes on top.

Yeah, boom piece out of there. Otherwise I'll slide it back to your feet until you to remake it.

Peace have no place in that for me. Now.

They're too They're too sweet. They're a weird sweet vegetable.

Where are we? Yeah?

My first little joke when I was a little kid, we had a Christmas ornament that said pray for peace, and I said, who would pray for little green balls? Which my parents laughed so hard because I was very young and made them think of, Oh, I don't know a frogs testicles.

I was very young. I know it's not a good joke now, but kid, you know that's funny.

It's a pretty good joke.

Next question, All right, I.

See where we are. We're fine, Okay, we're going to get.

Home at Sweetey mctaffey on Instagram says, if you if you could get a vanity license plate, what would it say?

Oh?

Good one, Well it's a little uh outdated, but I still want to get CRX to sy.

I like the car that CRX.

I don't know if they make it anymore, and I'm not sure if XTC the band is still kicking out jams, but combine them.

Oh great, novelty plate. That's actually my sister's idea, was it.

Yeah, she wrote an article in college about making fun of people that had vanity plates with all these examples that.

Were real, and she was shunned from the entire campus.

She heard a lot of feelings making fun of personalized license plates.

That's so dorky.

Yeah. Yeah.

My family, my mom had a weird thing about fancy cars, even though we were so middle class.

Was hilarious, but.

She like she always my dad and mom were always buying like a used Mercedes or whatever.

We always had used fancy cars.

So we had this one Mercedes that was like this almost like a vintage touring scene.

That was a bat chalant, be nonchalant.

He took all the chalants out of it.

So he So they bought this car and it was I think it was also like an early seventies Mercedes, and the license plate was my four end car.

Have I told you this?

Oh? That's so funny.

It was so dorky and so embarrassing. And then we like when we started driving my sister and I, it was normally my mom's car, but if something would happen, they'd be like, well, then take the Mercedes, and we'd be like, no, we refuse to drive that car to school. It was so it was so like weirdly, like, yes, here I am in my four end car.

We live on a farm. What do you doing?

That's the best? Grace asks Karen. What do you think about when you're swimming? Chris, what's in your head when you're skating?

Oh? Well, yeah, go you go ahead.

Swimming. I like to think about flying.

I have to be honest, I do a lot of see if I can hold my breath all the way over underwater to the other side, and as I do, I pretend I'm flying I also like to tell I pretend someone is there that I want to say something too, and then I'll practice a speech that I will never give that person. I do that a lot, so it'll be like, you know, I just wanted to say like that idea in my head, but then it's nothing I would ever actually do.

Well, it's hard to It's amazing how focus you have to be when swimming because I swim too or I have been again because my shoulders are on the fritz, and I think that I'm going to think of jokes I'm swimming, but I'm just focused on my breathing, like it actually takes. You have to like I like that while I'm swimming, my mind as a blank, and actually when I'm skateboarding the same thing.

I don't. I try and keep everything out of my head. That's the goal.

Yeah, because if I'm in my head and thinking about anything like taxes are getting injured.

It will, you will, it will. That's when you do get hurt.

When you're like in your head about something, you hesitate and then you end up hurting your ankle and being cotton a volcano.

Sure, well's you ever think?

You know?

I think sometimes I probably do my speeches when I'm treading water, because that's part of my I'll do like laps and get real real zoned out, and that's really fun. But then when I'm treading water, it really is just like what I have nothing to do except for think.

Yeah, yeah, but I do like it.

I also think about kicking off, like losing weight just by kicking it away, Like that's the feeling I have like working out of like you're getting strong.

There's something to do that if you you know, if you're lifting weights and you just stare at your muscle and think about that you're using your muscle. I've heard people say you're supposed to think that, But if I'm supposed to leave my mind blank, it's kind of funny because I think of the stapuff marshmallow man.

I really do. Then you don't think about other things.

Yeah, that's right, and Gozer is not going to make it a reality.

That's right. Yeah, because it's the.

Movie as far as you know.

Yeah, boy, okay, okay.

Next, gold Dust Taco says, if you're getting ice from the fridge and the ice cube falls on the ground.

Do you pick it up or kick it under the fridge? Oh wow.

I've done both lately because I'm growing up, I guess getting more mature.

I go to the sand and I rinse it off and I throw it in my drink.

Do you yeah, yeah, it'll it'll. Water just washes anything off a piece of ice.

I kick it toward a dog if it's hot outside, because dogs do like ice cubes.

Luckily two dogs there, and I have two dogs.

But I'm I think, like, I think I will pick it up because I have that weird My dad always harped on, like, be careful, be careful, be careful. So I'm like, I'll walk back by here and slip and fall and break my neck. So right, I might as well just take care.

Of this name.

Yeah, yeah, it is that. That is a true concern. We'll put you on your ass in ice cube for real, all right.

Lindsay Miallo on Instagram says if you could live in a TV series, which one would it be?

M Lindsay yeah, Lindsay, M yeah. I mean where do I want to be? That was a show. I like The Wild West. I like apartments of retired old ladies.

I mean, it's it's funny that Deadwood is the first one that popped into my head because I think that would be the worst place for me to live a woman where you're based either like a widow or a whore.

Sorry to use the terminology, but that's.

That's the words they would use in.

Deadwood, the terminology.

But I guess I would like something to like endeavor or something like a sixties British something or other or maybe yeah, yeah, because that's where I want to visit.

I just adopting your answers. I want to be in Deadwood and also down to Nabby.

It's not a bit, it's my answer.

I just want to show that I like that's always funny where I liked all the characters like cheers.

Yeah, oh yeah, and then I can drink.

You can drink.

But it's okay, it's part of the script. It's not my problem. No, yeah, final answer, final answer, cheers. I want everyone to know my.

Name on Instagram at Dina Davis. What instrument would you say matches your personality best?

Oh wow, musical instrument, yes, or or medical instrument?

You know what? It doesn't specify. That doesn't specify. I'm gonna have to say forceps. I'm just kidding.

I uh, it's not the trombone, which I played for a few years.

I just did not I was so cool.

I was such a sax guy, you know, right, and uh, just anything with a spit valve is not my instrument.

But I'm not sure.

I don't have one, said, okay, if I don't have one.

I mean it's hard to talk about what you think your personality is because or what like fits your personality, because I feel like and people.

Give those answers and everyone goes, she's so not a piano.

That's sad.

Yeah, so sad she thinks she's a piano.

I'm shiny and smooth on the outside and filled with a mess of strings.

On the inside and little hammers.

Are you Pinocchio? No a piano piano? I said, come on, uh yeah, I don't know. I know, I don't Never thought that would take days for me to answer that. Grated Nutmeg on Twitter asks, sorry, we're all laughing at.

Good.

What was your favorite family road trip or vacation you took as a kid.

Yeah, we made a regular practice of driving all the way from Missoula, Montana, down to down to Oh my god, it's there's San Diego, Coronado. Oh yeah, I had a great grandma there who was hilarious and terrific that lived to be over one hundred, which fingers.

Crossed Dad's mom, Dad's grandma.

That's grandma Dad's mom's mom.

And we had all the he had cousins there that all were like reminded me of the beach boys. And then I'd have these mysterious cousins my age that also skateboarded and surfed and stuff. I was like, oh man, this is like a that's those are the stickers I put in. We went to a surf shop in Coronado, I bought some stickers. I put them on that Volkswagon van and then kissed it goodbye. But those trips were great.

Well as siblings.

When you finally became siblings, yes, yes, that was the day because.

Well we're like, what are we're coincidence? Oh? Those are your parents? Also?

Oh my god, my sister, I've seen you in the kitchen.

Yes, that's like the one that ended you. That's seven up.

We did a trip.

Wow, we did a trip when I was I think like twelve. We drove it was our family and then my teacher, Missus Slater, and her husband in their own car. They were good friends with my parents, and we all went up to the Shakespeare Festival in.

Lynd Oregon. Oh yeah, that's a big one. Yeah.

And we drove up and it was super hot, and we stayed at this lake, a man made lake there, and we once we got there, me and my sister and my dad ran and jumped into the lake.

And my dad forgot to take his money out of his buckets. So as we jumped in, my dad comes up out of the water and goes dive.

Girls dive for the money, and so we had to dive down and try to grab all of his cash before it sank to the bottom of and we.

Missed a lot of it.

Oh that's so great.

And then we went to these we saw we saw the we saw a bunch of amazing plays. We saw the Philadelphia Story, we saw this incredible in the outdoor amphitheater. We saw Falstaff, which was incredible, like it was a very It made me want to act and perform. Oh wow, cool, it was amazing.

And every time your dad bought tickets it was with a soggy bill for real.

He was so mad, but he also knew like he couldn't be mad at anybody.

Yeah, because it's hilarious and entirely his own fault.

Yeah, it was pretty funny. That's great.

Yeah.

Jillian on Facebook ask are there certain songs you have to put on a road trip playlist?

Boy?

I the repeated road trip playlists go back to my kind of high school and college years because we just had the same You'd go in the same friends car that always drove and they had the same five tapes. Yeah, and most of my friends, especially if it was any kind of road trip, it would have Holiday Road, the song from Vacation. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Yeah, it's that song. And I still I'm a I'm a damn adult and I love hearing that song when I'm traveling.

It's good. Yeah, I love Holiday Road.

I say ac DC can get you there, and any version, any hit of a c DC's will, We'll drive you down the road. But these days I am all about podcasts on road trips because it kills time in a way that music.

Just simply can't.

It just like completely distracts you and then you're boom, you're done.

Yeah, it is true. Hearing a story unfold is the way the past time.

It really is a DC really yeah, I think so this.

Is our first argument. They ironically make me want to stick a something in and outlet.

No I don't. It's his voice.

Road tracks. Yeah.

Sorry, that was awful for everybody.

You're trying to make us.

See, I didn't know what my voice was going to do, and that.

Was not it. Maybe it's because I'm jealous.

Well I think it was because we listened to it as kids, because the older kids would play it and it seemed like this forbidden like oh my god, the devil has come to sing to us, and it was scary and amazing and stuff.

So that's why I like it.

Yeah yeah.

But then it's funny because like kiss seems so satanic and scary, and then you hear it and it's like baby baby yeah yeah yeah sex all days.

What I like. It's like, really to look like a cat, yeah all night.

A cat that miss behaved doesn't use a letter book.

I kick all the letter out of the.

Box because I'm the cat.

Yeah, I'm still your sartines off the counter.

Flynn's shooting out of torches on the end of the stage, big tongue hanging out.

It's actually pretty tame.

Okay, see the next question at nerd Heather on Twitter. What's something new you've tried this year that you unexpectedly enjoyed.

I love all these questions. Oh I found my way back.

Uh what did I try this year? I tried? What if I tried?

Have you tried anything?

You know? Maybe that's what the question should be.

Hey, this year, Fairbanks, you thought about applying yourself?

Ah? Boy, I uh, I'm not I'm not sure what h ah h. I don't have an answer.

You need to try some stuff. Hey what about wallpaper? Or you're decorating looking on your own? You've done all that.

Thank you.

You're better at thinking about me than I am. All those things I've enjoyed. Wallpaper was scary. They don't tell you got a little wet wiggle room there. And uh, there's the goal.

There's the goal. There is we know where we are.

He will swallow your soul and give you deals.

But yeah, and yes, interior design, I didn't know that I was into it. I've really enjoyed decorating my place and I've enjoyed sitting there alone. No, now I've had some visitors. It's unanimous. The place looks great.

Everybody likes that.

Yeah, well what else are they going to say?

What have I tried? Let's see see what have I tried?

Chris?

Uh oh, this is going to be like you know me better than contest and me losing. You tried getting back into stand up, though I do not. You tried out a new house.

Just use my answer. Then you gave me.

This is not This is not well for me. It's not a big trier. It's hard to think a thing is it really is? My back started to sweat just thinking about it. I did try to go to Universal City because my family was going there, and my beautiful not blood related niece was like, please come with us, and I was like okay.

Fine and went.

And she's an adult, so it wasn't like right, you know, because I thought she wouldn't care if I didn't go, and then she was like, will you please go? And then I was like, even though I hate this, Then I realized I don't know if I hate things or not if I've never done them, So why don't I just try things and do them?

And relax.

Yeah, you got to open your mind at Universal. Yeah, you turn out I do like Harry Potter.

I love Harry Potter. I loved going there.

I loved how happy everybody else seemed being there. Everything about it was delightful, and I realized I am too. I have to kind of scrub out the last of that nineties attitude of I'm above things when I actually it's not true. I like to like things, have fun and be dumb and you know, walk around the big smile on my face.

Yep, good answer, Chucky enough. All right, this one's an easy one.

Well, I'm assuming at PB with Jilly says, would you rather fight a horse sized duck or a hundred duck sized horses?

Oh that's a great one.

Fight yes, okay, one hundred horse sized ducks or wait, duck size horses.

Duck sized horses. Oh, I don't want to fight them. They sound a door I know.

Okay, I put them on, grab them and put them in my pocket. I guess I gotta beat up the big duck.

Yeah.

I think.

I think the hundred duck sized horses would just wear me to after a while, and I'd be like mad and sad.

I and my experience at the Echo Park Lake by my house is one duck.

It makes me run. They do not want to be friends.

Yeah, No, ducks are weird.

I've already fought a duck sized duck and I didn't want that experience to be modified at all. I just want to enjoy them from a distance. It's say, I like your green necktie.

Why you stay over there? Friend? The normal sized.

Ducks they love hearing jokes about themselves.

This one from uh Jed Adrian sorry Jadrian H on Instagram says I think this is applied to both of you, or could apply to anyone.

But how long could you stand being handcuffed together?

You and I?

Yeah?

Is this like a right up until that first private bathroom moment? I would say it depends on It's just going to be soon. You and I are both little bladders.

Yeah, yes, yeah, we'd have to get used to each other peeing. Are we in the bat? Are we gagged and in a in a truck? An empty truck? Where where are we being taken?

Are we just having fun at Halloween?

Yeah, it's just.

A fun exercise.

Are we have we been? Are we being held captive? Right?

Look now by this question.

I guess we passed the time by asking each other questions about why we're handcuffed together.

We'd be fine.

It's fine.

I mean driving around doing this podcast is kind of like being handcuffed.

Yeah, really, I can't jump out, so let's say twenty minutes.

Yeah at Livy Haha on Instagram, says will we ever get a special dinner episode starring both your dads?

I knew that one was coming, Jim and Jim my dad.

I think I've talked about this, but we used to call him the frog and box because my dad is the most hilarious.

Person I've ever been around. Sorry, and he will not perform for other people.

Right, that's every funny person.

I mean, it's something you get over once you become a comic or what you know, you have to learn how to do it on command. But yeah, most funny people I know, you ask them to be funny and they clam up.

Yeah, because they have a normal personality. Yes, exactly, so you could. You would have to.

My dad being there also would be like a giveaway, especially if we handcuffed them together. But we if you podcasted with your dad in the car and just record it without his knowledge.

Yes, I would have to do that and then get his permission afterwards.

Yeah, and even then I wouldn't even mind doing that version with my dad.

Yeah, oh so just so it was secret.

Yeah, he talks the same whether we're recording or not.

I mean, it's too much pressure for regular people, I think, to modulate themselves, right talking, But my dad, I swear to God. You know what we'd have to do, and I have thought about this too, is sit at a dinner table and just record the conversation that naturally happens at a dinner table, because that's when my dad's at his finest. Yeah, and he'll just tell twenty five stories and you know, really really, you know, go to town

Of course.

Oh, they're doing a production of Annie there at the Fremont Center Theater.

Someone gets to wear a red curly wig.

And it's not me.

It's okay, you're still an orphan in my heart. Yeah, that's funny. Because when we eat dinner, but it's just everyone eyes on the price.

Let's get rid of this food. Nobody talk really, yeah, yeah we don't. We don't. We've talked before or after.

That's funny.

And then it's you might as well be swimming.

Oh, it's ours. Is just like fucking Mark Twain story hour. Everyone is everyone's talking the whole time.

From l Aria. Second question, sorry to play favorites.

If you could freaky Friday for twenty four hours with anyone who is alive right now, who would you switch places with.

For a day.

Ooh that's a great question, A nice freaky Friday question.

Oh, George Burns, do you know who's alive and who's dead?

I feel like you're not aware?

No, no, what's going back to the original question? I wanted to George Burns as the devil? Yeah, I just turned into Jeff b George Burns as the devil. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

That was my Jeff Goldblum. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes yeah George. Okay, what have I just kept doing it? Uh? Sure, let's go with Cold Blue.

You twitch with Jeff?

Sure?

Okay, yeah, I bet he has an interesting life. I get to wear different frames of glasses. Yeah, you would, and my body would still be the same youthfulness because he's in a chamber of cryogenics right now.

That's right. He will not.

Age, he will not. I think I would pick.

It's called the big chill.

I would pick someone like, Oh, I go where these people go.

I think I would choose a Blake Lively type of person, someone who is like has very long legs and even toned skin. And I would put on a pair of shorts like a thing I've never been able to do in my life, and walk around freely.

I would be married to Ryan Reynolds.

That would be fun and funny for a short amount of time, right, definitely, you know, put a clock on that though.

Yeah, your question, it's better answer is better. My question was the same.

Yeah, yeah, I think it would be nice.

It would be fun for twenty four hours to live as a crazy hot girl and then be able to escape it and not have to deal with the hideous reality of being a crazy hot girl, right right, because I don't think they have.

And it'd be fun for twenty four hours to sleep with someone's hot.

Husband, Yes that's what you're thinking, and be like with those loins.

Again suddenly be all weird about Hey, you know what I want to do tonight, and be like what, we've never done this before, and be like put the mask on, do it.

Stuff like that. Yeah, it's like a scene from Face Off.

Oh my high beams are on.

Oh no, wonder if we've been so popular, so weird part of town. They all wave with one finger.

Oh, here's the freeway we've been looking for.

Oh we're not lost anymore. Bless it everyone. What's the next question? At law?

Wash Gar asked what were your favorite subjects in school?

Oh?

I like to read aloud whatever however I could get that done. That's what I wanted to be doing.

Yeah, it's it's funny that subjects that I liked are the ones that I probably didn't do very well.

Except for art. All I did.

All I wanted to do was draw, and I did well in art classes. Not to toobe my own horn, but I did do that also, and I was not good at it. But I like biology and drawing. I didn't like dissecting animals. I was confronted by that, but I like drawing them, so I guess drawing. I like drawing in biology class. I like any class where I was allowed to draw instead of do the work.

So maybe art art that's what it is.

I knew it was one of the garfunkals liked art.

I mean, I liked.

I liked writing, and I liked acting basically all the things that were not school in any.

Way, right right, Well, I didn't realize how much I wanted to write and act until I was already in college.

Yeah, you know, but that's the best time to realize it. Yeah.

At the meg base, he says, do you remember the first joke you ever performed on stage?

I do.

I was taking a comedy class visiting Austin with my improv group Pop's family, and I took a little stand up clinic from a comedian named Matt Sadler. He said, just talk about stuff that tell a story about and I talked about my friend's bulldog that I lived with that would bite my feet as I slept, and he said, well, they sense fear, and I said, well, I guess I got to sleep with more confidence.

That's my first joke.

Great, Yeah, as a dog would bite my feet, I'd wake up and he'd be biting fe I mean, it didn't bring down the house, but it didn't make me want to do comedy.

It was a good riff.

Yeah, it was a good Yeah.

It was a griffin I did in like sixth grade, I took.

An acting class or fifth grade maybe I took an acting class that was like Pedaluma Civic, you know, like neighborhood whatever, and we had to do a.

Thing where you had to bring in.

It was almost like show and tell, but you had to bring something in and talk about it. You had to bring something in and instead of show and tell, like we all knew, you had to lie about what the thing was.

So I brought in this doll that was.

Like a sock monkey doll, and then I just said it was my sister Laura, and then just started talking about my sister.

Laura, like and ugh, you know, I had to bring around everywhere whatever and I destroyed. These children were crying, the teacher was going nuts. It was so weird.

And all I was doing was like just trying to think of like what would I say about my sister and pretend it's this.

Doll while you're holding a doll. And it was just a perfect storm.

Yeah, like real, I think it was because it was real.

Yeah, and it was me putting on a little edge of like, oh my sister bugs me. But it's this monkey and so I don't know it killed in that way where I went, I think this is I think I'm right to.

Think I should do this.

Yeah, that's cool.

Basically, but that's it wasn't really jokes. I remember doing my first set, but I don't remember. All I know is the material must have been absolute garbage because I didn't know how to write a joke when I first started.

Yeah.

Yeah, once I legitimately was getting on stage, I don't remember.

Because of that first year of comedy.

I probably had six or seven beers before you show, and I would just feverishly ramble and say things and until I got laughs.

But you know, that's still kind of what I still do.

I mean, yeah, that's kind of what all comedy is.

Yeah. Yeah, it feels like pickling your liver and trying to talk.

And breathe, just trying to stay alive not faint, all right.

At Molly Wolverton, Nest's see what's the scariest movie you watched as a kid? Boy? I think yours is that? Yeah, scary knife Lady in the Voodoo, don't it is.

It's and you know what's funny.

My cousin who was the oldest cousin who was baby sitting us that night, My cousin Cheryl. I just saw her at a family party that I went to in Pedaloma, like a couple of weeks ago, and we brought it up again. We talked about it so much, and Cheryl was like, that was that she was sixteen or fifteen and I was six and like everyone else was older than me by two and four year increments.

And she was like, it was the scariest thing I'd ever seen. I don't know how you. She was like, it was.

So irresponsible it and I watched it.

I thought it would be silly or scary, but it is really scary when she gets turned into a scary.

Doll with a knife.

Yes, it's horrible, those little teeth, I mean that doll itself.

So it's the Trilogy of Terror. It was a TV special. You can rent it now. It's also available like on I think streaming some streaming services somewhere.

I just watched it on YouTube.

Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, it's really legit scary.

I was gonna say Salem's Lot because I was I was young and saw that and it's, uh, it's that guy. That's Juliet Lewis's dad, that's always in movies with Clint Eastwood.

Oh uh, Jerry Lewis something Lewis. Yeah, yeah, it's her dad.

It looks like he was always he was in any which way you can, and all these old oh hold these old yeah, Oh that's Juliet Lewis's dad. Yeah, they look the same. It's funny that Salem's Lot was scary. Sales was honestly the scary. I think accidentally.

Coming across Oh look at them beautiful, it's scary.

We had VHS tapes with adult movie, not porn, but at a very young age, watched a clockwork Orange horrified me because there's like very realistic like rape. Yes, it's very very disturbing attack, and then it's it's scary guys and it was just traumatized me.

Yeah, that's a bad one. Yeah it is.

It's not like an in a category of scary, but it's a weird kubrick and it's rape.

You know.

I watched Duel with my uncle Steve when I was probably seven.

Is that where that Semi is chasing the guy with the mustache.

Yes, and it's it's Steven Spielberg. Yeah, it's one of those first movies. Gotcha, And it is right, it's still stilbork and it's super bizarre. It's very seventies. That's what everything was like in the seventies. It was kind of like a dude with a mustache and semi truck.

That's what the whole era was about.

Yeah, and in dust and uh, I just knew I couldn't ask for us to watch anything different because I wasn't really supposed to be there anyway.

It was like I was supposed to be outside playing, so.

If I was going to be inside near the TV, I had to keep my mouth shut. So I just sat there like. I liked it too while my uncle Steve ate soup and we had a pretty good time.

I liked hanging with it cigarette. Yes, yes, get a load of that. Are you scared?

He's the one that yeah, I told you right, he's the one that you said he used to tell me where the Easter eggs were.

It's it's a great visual.

It's a great I just picture the ash dangling on yep, the egg being there, you all decorated.

Picking it up. It's very very boring visuals.

Just like the seventies. Yes seven, if we exhausted it there anymore?

I think, Well, there's this one from I can't pronounce it, like my full of cab on Instagram. Would you rather be? It was like would you rather be? I lost it, but it said would you rather be trapped in the desert or attacked? Like for days without water or attacked.

By a shark? Wow?

Uh, desert?

But you die that way?

Do I die?

I think I think it's like up to your skills, Like if you could get out of either one, like trapped in.

The desert for days with that water or attacked by a shark.

I think my best chances are in the desert.

Yeah.

I that everyone's going to be like, you go, trapped in the desert, what a dort?

But if you did attack by a shark and you're still alive. I mean.

There was I know a guy that got bit by a shark that like a snowboard camp. He got bit by a shark, and somewhere in Oregon there's sharks everywhere, And I just immediately made me think it was cool as shit.

I mean, it's pretty fucking cool.

Yeah, get off your cooler.

That was great, very good. You're very good. That was some some uh that was some good driving.

Thank you.

That was really intense.

Karen Desert Chris Shark, who won who?

I just think that if I was in the water at the same time as a shark, I would scream so much I would swallow water and drown.

And yes, of course I would if I if you cartoonishly saw the fin floating on the water.

And I think about this all the time. I'm petrified of a shark attack.

Yeah, it's the reason I'm not a more amazing surfer. Or it's because I just suck at it. But I I feel like usually a shark bite, it's like, oh my god, what just pulled my leg? Also it hurts, and then you look down and your foot is mangled right like it's you don't see.

It coming, Oh I see, So maybe there isn't that. It's not like a movie. So the terror isn't really there because they hits He hits you and goes yeah.

And goes, and then you're in pain and then you gotta deal with, you know, walking through the sand with an open wound, finding someone to put you in their ambulance, all that.

Stuff, finding an ambulance that's hanging out of the beach.

I just uh boy, the desert.

I mean you know now that you put it like that. Also because I'm very fair, fair skinned.

Think of the sunburn you'd have done that, shark sound nice?

Oh please?

Now I'm like, open, open fins, Welcome me with your open fins, shark, tackle me.

With your sweet sweet gills, mister shark man.

It's so sad that this was the episode where Chris definitely had a heart out and I.

Gotta so lost the words that will happen.

Okay, my friend made it to the skate video reunion premier thingy that I can show up late for.

I think for real. Yeah, I'm uber there, I got credentials.

Guys, this was a great one.

Thank you.

So.

I love the question too. We have to think so last Well, not really, it's just fun.

It's very fun in it.

There's probably enough questions left, sorry to interrupt, that we can do this again sometime.

Don't you think, Stephen, Yes, Stephen, their.

Mission, sir, that's fun. I love characters. Thank you for your question.

Yes, thank you for listening to this podcast. We really appreciate it and we it's very touching. I feel like all the tweets I get when people talk about listening to it, it's.

Like people, it's just nice.

People say really lovely things and talk about how they drive with us in the car and that we're all together and it's all really love.

So many people that.

Have specifically said that it helps them when their things aren't going well. Really, I get so many emails just to my website contact form that's like, I've been having a hard time because of this and this and this, this person sick. I've had a hard week. And then you guys make me laugh and I'm like, wow, yea that keeps happening.

That's great.

I mean, it's really and it really just boo. It strokes my ego is not the most important part and.

The grossest way to say it.

It really really really polishes my ego. It really gives it a rock hard stroke.

But also because we both know what that's like, so to think that we're giving you know, relief to people who might be in a shitty position or having a bad day or whatever. We get you and that makes us happy. Yeah, to make you happy, Yeah, it makes me feel good. Thank you and keep on listening. You have been listening to Do you need a ride?

D Y n A R. Just han't got this guy because he's standing there. Oh do you know him?

Yes? That's Billy Jensen. Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home? Either way you want to be.

There, doesn't matter how much baggage you claim. And give us time and a terminol and gay we want to send you off in style. You wanna welcome you back home. Tell us all about every.

Scared he was? It fine, Malborn?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

To ride?

Do you mean.

Little?

Little?

With Karen and Cress

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