Ep. 57 - Chip Pope

I leave in I you wanna way back home? Either way we want to be there.

Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim to give us. Time and a turn and al and gay. We want to send you off inside. You wanna welcome you back home?

Tell us all about it. We scared her? Was it fine?

Now?

Porn? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do your need ride?

Ride with Karen and Chris? Welcome to Do you need a ride?

This is Chris Fairbanks and this is Karen kil Garrett.

We're near the improv.

It's so close you can feel it burning your neck.

A show hasn't started, but you can hear the laughs of the ghosts of ghost shows.

Past sad old audience members.

That died, laughs from the sixties, powdered wig laughs. Oh whatever.

The building the seventeen sixties, Yes.

Yes, before the improv. A lot of people don't know this. Before the improv, the world famous improvisation was located there. It was a court room where a lot of powdered wig and the laws used to be so funny at the time, like you know your charge with not wearing your blue or whatever that people actually laughed during court. Oh, it's a lot of the laughs are from old court cases. Oh, I see, that's why I said all that. I got it and made up the story to follow.

It was kind of a parallel.

It was close to not being It was close to being a ridiculous non sequitor of a tangent that was.

Can I say what I respect?

Yes, you avoided Indian burial ground, which we're all tired of.

Hearing about it.

I'm so tired of that, especially that's close to the fourth July, where I am sensitive to Native American issues.

Oh. Can I tell you something else?

Yes? Please?

I just looked at the map because of something on Twitter. There was a map it was probably about gay marriage passing, and they showed it probably of the United States. And I did not realize that Montana touched Canada.

You thought that maybe now a lot of people confuse Montana from Minnesota or Wisconsin and but touch Canada.

I thought that.

I thought that Montana was kind of by Colorado and Idaho to Wyoming.

You thought Montana was Wyoming. A lot of people do that?

Is that? What that those things are? I just thought it was in that area more.

You would be amazed at how many when I say, oh, I'm from Montana and people go, oh, I love Jackson Hole.

I'm mostly embarrassed because I feel it's unfair. It's a gap in my education because I switched schools. I went from fifth grade to public school to sixth grade to private.

School around the time you learned the states.

Yes, where in at my old school you learned all that in sixth grade, the presidents and the states and all that stuff.

And in my new school they had already learned it.

So I thought New England itself was a state until I was a senior in high school and my friend's mom heard me say it, and because she was from Boston, and she screamed out loud and then planned a summer trip.

What are you doing?

He kind of gave us a head tilt. Okay, this rock and roll mountain biker.

He wasn't terrible looking.

That man on that bike, and he was borderline without a home. Yes, it's it's something you get used to right away. In Los Angeles's handsome homeless people with headshots, A lot of them.

Look like the guy, the younger guy from Breaking Back. Many many of the homeless here look like Aaron Pinkston or whatever.

That guy.

Yes, yes, and you have to be careful because you get starstruck and then and then you of course.

Get very sad about because all of a sudden, it's like, look at that handsome guy and he's yelling at a parking metereah with an underwear on his head.

That poor man is he's gone.

So he's down and out except in the jawline department.

Good lord, after those permanently flared nostrils, I love so much.

You could slice bread with those chisels, not nostrils.

Now that we're talking about his people's nostrils, can I just and bread? One of our listeners tweeted this at us okay, and it made me laugh so hard.

Thank you. It was a guy and I can't remember your name now. It made me laugh really hard.

I have it saved, but it's way back in those because it was two episodes ago. We talked about Sally Kellerman for so long, but we called her Sally Kirkland. Yes, who is that crazy woman that shows up on the Red carpets and has like.

Her she always is dressed crazy whatever.

And I'm sitting here talking about how much I love Sally Kellerman or I said Kirkland, like I'm this big fan.

I didn't even get her last name right right, and be embarrassing.

I knew that you were saying her name wrong, but you had talked me into believing you because you said you used to do an impression of her. So he's like, well, certainly you know the name and I don't.

Well, now I have to throw this in your face. Well, you were the.

First one to say Kirkland. I just never corrected you because it sounded right to me.

You know that I said that is because I'd just been to Costco for Kirkland signature jeans, muffins and batteries and waters and winter tires.

Kirklands.

We make everything actresses, tires, Kirkland sweaters. Here at Kirkland, we want to remind you that some child's fingers in another country or sore from making our products Kirkland.

We cover it all on the backs of children in India and maland.

We make sure everyone still wears high rise jeans.

I feel like I've I carry the embarrassment of a mistake like that always, like I'm I'm totally the big mouth that's always like, I love Sally Kirkland the most, and just go on and on what an honor was to work with her and whatever, and the whole time I'm talking about Kellerman and don't really know what I'm talking about.

Ever, I wish we could remember who tweet corrected us.

He actually tweets. There were several.

Things that we got wrong in that episode, and he tweet corrected all of them and was kind of enjoying it.

He wasn't like, it wasn't me.

I think I know who that was.

I thought it was a new face.

I mean, we're setting ourselves up for it.

Oh really, Oh, I didn't recognize it as any any of our usual right.

It was a string of things and there was no profile pick.

I think so was he an egg? Was an egg?

He was an egg man famous based on the famous Beastie Boys.

The things he was correcting were so deeply wrong that it wasn't I kind of liked reading it.

It wasn't John Rivett, John Rivett, I don't know. I don't know Jay the jam Well, those are two people, along with Kevin W. Young that continue to be a fan and chime in and I appreciate having three fans. I really do.

It's fun.

Yeah, it was zero, be overwhelming. If it was a dozen or.

More, I couldn't handle it because I would get so many things wrong.

We would just be assaulted with sweets all day.

And TMZ and not being able to go to lunch in public, all that stuff that comes along with having more than twelve fans.

You and I love to lunch on the sidewalk while talking about ourselves and our podcast, so it makes it virtually impossible when fans are around.

And you know, I don't do that if the lighting isn't right. But oh it's hard. It's hard to be a public figure, very difficult. It's this Chip's neighborhood. It's very nice.

It is. I usually park right here.

Oh wait, kind of diagonally on the sidewalk.

I was looking at my text and trying to move my car at the same time. Not safe. It's okay or sane.

Not safe for work.

MSFW, guys, I have to apologize last time we missed.

We missed you last week. It's on me. I had to go to Keealsburg, California to do the Small Town Comedy Festival.

How was that? It?

Was super fun.

I didn't ask why you were going to be out of town, but I.

Figure appreciate the freedoms you give me in this relationship.

It's just me not having interest in things more than anything.

And I'll be honest, the most interesting man in the world.

What are we of not? And well this says all news to me.

Yeah, I'm the guy from the Billboards. Oh wow, I just tried to keep the beard closer to my face. There he is.

There he is. Let's fire off into traffic. He's waving. He seems excited to be on the show.

I think he's gonna be excited.

There he is. Yep, I'm gonna roll down there. I'm gonna say hi, Hey, Chip getting.

Into the car, Bits and Chips.

Chip pup to the Hollywood Bowl. Please Hong Kong right away, sir, Chip Pope is in the vehicle.

Chip Pulp.

Everybody, how are you, buddy, I'm good. How are you guys doing? I feel like I haven't seen you in a long time.

I saw your perform the other day at Little Joy. It was awesome, but I think I was like trapped in the audience, so I couldn't say hello.

I think you left what was the best joke Chris did.

Oh Man, The one about like not doing so well during the set.

Yeah, yeah, I pepper my act with those and they're improvised and they always suggest and that's it's just a survival mechanism.

Sure, there's always work to comment and tell the audience how much they're not enjoying you.

That's my favorite part of any of my sets is that.

Your neighborhood who said they want to be told what to think? And I think that's a good one. Maybe it was like Ron Babcock or somebody said, like they want to be dictated to the audience. Yeah, and I kind of like that philosophy. I don't really do it, probably myself.

But maybe you have to lead them.

If if you tell them they're doing badly, they'll start going, this is going badly exactly.

So if you say it's going great and they just think he's diluted, but yeah, maybe it's going great.

Wait did you do a set that night? No?

I didn't.

I just came to see Kerry Lindo from.

Austarry Lindo, she's tot's cool.

I love it.

Uh that's a girl from Austin.

Yeah, she's terrific, a woman, a.

Heteronormous have nonis.

I don't know what they are.

Why can't people understand? The labels are so easy?

L B, G, D E l X.

From Omaha. You also skipped that level of school where they tell you the alphabet we were talking. That's a reference to something earlier. Chip, You're you're being polite by laughing at it.

This is just like being you know, putting a burlap burlap sack and being thrown off a river. Wait, what am I trying to say, being put in a burlap sack and thrown off a.

Bridge into a podcast? Yeah, yeah, that's what I'm trying to say. Kittens, Yes, your style. You're in a tight place. You're looking at the back of two people's heads. It's exactly like being in a bur labsack.

Animal hair.

We made you put it.

Oh shit, I'm wearing a black shirt too, are you.

Yeah?

That was a bad IDEA roller George Lopez.

Hair, I call you, let me roll you.

I have this exact car, and so it's weird to be in the back seat of it.

Oh yeah, I don't know.

I'm not sure if I have been in the back seat.

I've never been in the back seat if you're two thousand and eight, I don't think so is in no age it's a two thousand tons.

Yeah, that's we're not bragging.

They got really nice. I think it's the same.

Exact because this is too wide.

No, the sight lines are awful.

Yeah, it's crazy.

There's no reason for a car to have two sniper windows.

Yeah, you know up in the front I was almost killed in really well, which one I mean? I hate to make it. I'm just saying, be caref don't ever get rear ended when you're stopped at a light. Always check your mir That's all saying, Oh, wait, so you were. It's a bad omen for me to talk about it while in the car, But I.

It won't happen again.

Exactly happened? T mentioning it and then it happening. What are the chances of that. I'm not someone I've said this before that believes that by mentioning something, you put it out in the universe. I think you are canceling it out right.

We've all seen world according to Garp.

You know that's he.

Bought that house because the plane crashed into it. And then not even sure if that's in the book and John Let's go traded traded his tongue in for a dress. I remember, yeah, he didn't have a tongue like that. She was a sexual suspect. Wait, I can't remember what thing is now?

Sexual suspect and excell Linebacker the name of the name of.

Garp's mom's book. There is a.

Grumbling noise, but I'm going to pretend it doesn't exist. I'm just going to turn down. You'll note that the.

Probably the led Zeppelin underneath the whole thing.

Are you my head? Your system is great picking it up.

The radio has Fool in the Rain on at all times.

It's on the same frequency as your thoughts.

Barren Ara. Oh there's you're gonna thing.

You're gonna have to pay for it. Oh, that's right, pay for the rights.

How much is that gonna cost me for the little like Latin part in the middle of the song? Not that much for the rest of the song, A lot for the Latin carnival breakdown.

It's like five dollars.

Actually it's the Mexican rates.

The actual Fool in the Rain song is like two million dollars.

The whistle, the whistle samba in the middle it's actually only fifty dollars.

Yeah, that was from a sound library. That's where where led Zeppelin got that.

It is a good song. You can't deny that song.

It's oh right now, I know it's it's a slammer.

Oh there's a ladin your through the outdoor and in the shuffling downtown.

Is it?

Is it considered the last album because like your drummer dies, I mean I guess that that pretty much makes the last not for everybody doesn't make a last album.

But no, you just say you man up and you learned to drum with your feet. It's usually instead. Yeah, yeah, like definitely.

That guy came back drum he drummed, he parted.

Their songs got about I don't know, forty beats per minute slower though once he lost that arm. Seriously, because you know, take take the you know, time signature and photograph and put it up.

You get to pour some sugar on me. It's like, man, yeah eight a minute and moved a hard accident. Yeah, it was really complete there it is. That was perfect. That was Simpson's janitor. I mean, of course, no one times the loss of their drummer's arm. But if it's right before it's love ballad season. I mean that perfect.

That was perfect Love out of your arm socket.

Oh my god. Yeah, too specific to go there you live.

There, don't give a ship there.

You don't give a ship where you live. That's my dad always.

Said, go ship next where where the neighbors live?

Where you live.

I think that is the air conditioning on. Yes, I'm that up until now. We Oh, your mic is very powerful.

I'm so sorry.

It's quite all right.

I'm glad it wasn't Zeppelin. It was just some nice.

Ac in the car. We have seventeen mics set up for three voices. A lot of people think it's overkilled, but I just like troubleshooting.

I've always thought it was under kill. Man, is that I'm going to start.

That's a good one.

Under Kill that's my new band name.

And uh even just enough. And I've attacked it with reintroducing wolves into Montana. Did I miss that? Probably? No. It's a frustrating thing. And I know you guys are both thinking of Wyoming right now. But in Montana they reintroduced wolves which were going extinct. They were endangered, and then within a year you were able to hunt them.

Well, essentially, it sounds like they didn't need to be doing anything to nature because nature.

Balances itself out.

Yeah, kind of thing that always happens when they like introduced, they stick some fish in a pond and suddenly that fish is eating everything else.

Have you ever seen a fish getting introduced to a pond? Like where the mayor comes and they ever rippen draped over the pond? Did that? Then he goes with a snorkel out a number of times where I'm.

From ponds and then they move on.

Why would you leave that for the perfect pond? Why would you leave that for a fountain? And Gower Street?

Oh, should I get should I get up onto some action streets?

Chip?

Remember that when we were on sunset that time and there was a curse. Listen to this because it really happened. Remember the limo of twelve year old girls that pulled up next to us singing out of the window. Were they singing Miley Cyrus or Katy.

Perry one of those?

And I ended up getting a short video of which they were so young and stupid and they were it was like they thought they were partying on sunset.

It was really hilarious and you yelled something really funny at them, And now I can't remember.

I wish I could remember. It was so many that would come in handy during a podcast.

I know, or you're supposed to be funny, I got you exactly.

We like to leave our anecdotes detail less.

Yes, well, people could probably call in with the anecdote in the next week if they remember, you know.

That would be good.

What would have what would have been a good thing for Chip to have yelled at twelve year old girls on sunset? Tweet us yes, and let us know what you think the funniest thing, and then I will look at the video.

Uh, but somewhere on my phone.

Yes, I love unicorns.

It it was similar to that.

It probably was something like that. I love all the twelve year old girls were obsessed with unicorns when I was in middle school. That was a thing, yeah, to like, because you're already like subverting your sexual urges because you're just getting them and they're very scary. Yeah, and you're but and so you draw pictures of horses because that's you can't draw a picture of a dick. I draw a picture of something that has a big dick always, and then you draw a dick on its head.

And I was so crazy because right out of the gates, I was drawn horse dicks. Yeah, just covering with a base on them, usually some kind of an oak base, and usually with wings.

And that's how you got to become a designer for Babe Land the dildo Store.

Where is that it's a store. I do some freelance work with mostly composite.

That one was truly girl, that's a good side.

Gigne exactly what designs. You will always recognize them because they're on an oak base. I love that. I treat my dil does like taxidermy. I keep them mounted and in on a grandpa's mantle so they're functional.

Can we get just.

A little because it's so hot, Yes, I'm gonna it does affect the.

Sound, can turn my mic down or something.

It is I guess what I'm dancing around is the answer being no, Well, but if.

You this through a window because it's too.

Hot, okay it but to me, the quality of this, because it is legitimate rumbling, and maybe I need to.

Get a new how about this ambient sounds better?

Yes?

Okay, I just need a little air.

Okay, you could like you could probably market that though, that kind of wall dick, you know, with like an oak base that you can hang. Yeah, because you know, because I've come across accidentally, you know, like accidental. We've all come across straight porn accidentally, and like sometimes that's the thing straight porn, like accidentally it.

Just comes up on my computer. I think, oh, your broken every time I turn it on him typing in a specific U R L. Now you know what I'm realizing it's me. It's sorry, Yeah, I realized.

But that's the thing though, wal dick right where they just have a dildo that's on a wall or against a desk or something. A lady is just like jumping up against it.

What's that Dildo's for the dead? Dildo's for the dead, nor the den A lot of people can the dead. I mean if you set when you think of a den, you think of the dead, because only our grandpa's and people that have passed had dens.

And Jerry Garcia, Oh, Jerry.

I'm they're touring again with a hologram of him.

A hologram.

I hope so, and I hope it's just a mess up and it's just Tupac singing.

The hologram store has two canisters. It's either Jerry Garcia or.

No, you like me. I am so old though.

When I went to that Coachella that had Tupac and when and it was happening, it was like at seven o'clock on Sunday.

Night, and a lot of it in grade school, and I.

Yes, but I was there and I and I just distinctly remember thinking, I wonder what's on sixteen minutes tonight. So that's not good when you're seeing like a once in a lifetime hologram of Tupac.

Yeah, but it didn't feel like a once in a lifetime situation because I remember seeing that.

I do not like what that guy was doing. Yeah, that was a little dangerous. And he just turned left.

He looked like he was going to turn right right stoned.

They're so crazy when they drive here something baseline, and it's.

The day after the fourth July, so they're stoned. On top of having trace amounts of vodka and other liquors, moonshine, probably Crank Crank. They have a copy of Crank on DVD. You know.

I mean, I'm always like a little more generous. So to the driving, I like, I get upset and then I just think, well, these people have all their broken dreams too, you know. It takes the edge off a little bit where I like get up to see who was doing all these bad driving things, and it's like some old lady looks like, you know, Gloria Stewart or you know, and I think, well, she was probably up for Titanic and she didn't get it, you know, audition

You can forgive anyone in a car if you go, oh my god, they just came away from some terrible right.

And next time someone cuts cuts me off, I'm gonna say, I'm sorry, you blew it.

I'm sorry you're such a bad cold reader.

Next time. It's all based on turns, You'll you'll get a turn next time.

So random here, you almost killed me you should take an auditioning cold read glass behind toy. You know a lot of Wait, don't don't drive away. I'm so yelly.

Wait, I know a great guy, no great audition stuff.

It won't be intimidating.

It to cold read its natural, it feels natural.

Oh he's a mile away? Now?

Does make me strift down at the top.

I had to follow them for four miles.

It's like that that urban myth about the guy that followed the girl, the guy in the backseat of a car.

Oh, right, was that the one where the arm was hanging. Yeah, the guy was hanging from the tree.

He was He was flashing his brights and she thought she was being chased by a maniac. But actually there was a maniac in the back seat.

Oh no, you never heard of That's gotta be real.

Yeah, that's scary.

That sounds like it could happen.

Yeah, I heard right away that if someone else the bright you don't flash him here because it's a gang member initiation. That's not true to drive with one headlight out or with.

Your headlights on, your headlights off.

Yeah, and if you flash him and say hi, sir, look at this. Uh, the sight sounds of Los Angeles and people. I didn't like that. That guy made a horrible mistake. Oh, it's a little too like to pull over.

Now, Yeah, don't pull over now, fool. You know what?

That ambulance is full of two people who blew the audition, tring to get someone who blew the audition.

They all had a call back.

Yeah, there was so many bad auditions happening in that even though only one.

In nine people in Los Angeles County working show business. I'm gonna say that those ambulance drivers, whether.

Whether or not you're an actor, you're auditioning every day, right, and you can quote me on that.

You're wishing just to be in this world.

Life is a play. You're Wayne Dyer. I don't know who that is.

That's the That's the big, tall hippie guy that's always talking in a soothing voice on Channel nine.

Oh, I was thinking of doctor Oss.

I guess I'm totally different, two different guys.

Uh, Chip, you like music so many different types of music a lot. You're are you do you like music so much that you enjoy the grateful Dad? We mentioned that no minutes ago. I don't. Yeah, I can't.

I never That's one of those ones. I could never never get into one of those hair pins station. You know, it just sounds like it's for infants.

I was with my friend and her sister and uh uh oh, yeah, sure, sure can we can we have your sign of release? You're on our podcast? Do you want to?

They're gonna I'm gonna let him get in. I hope I remember though.

Yeah, he has to turn right quick here and buy a new beanie.

Yeah, clearly you're a badass. When the windows rolled up.

It's not how it always is.

Really think that the key to the grateful dead is a ship ton of drugs. I mean, isn't that What people are really enjoying is the experience.

There was a guy that I used to before I had an outlet, which was stand up comedy, that's my art. I used to go to bars and break dance and there was yes, me and my friends. We had routines. Even I was deep in the game of bar and there wasn't a place to do. It was a good breakdance. I'm pretty good. My days are kind of over. I broke my arm once doing.

It, but I that all sounds like a live.

I would dance every thing. I'm gonna say and this story is true. Okay, So there's this guy that hated me because I would break dance while he's playing pool. We ended up at an after hour show on that guy's side, my friend's sister and her friend. Everyone was out of their mind, but because of drinking. This guy was a drunk that liked the dead so much that at his house in the basement where he only had a bed and a log for a table with a hatchet in it. He was a bearded man before it

You do believe in putting something out into the universe.

I did, I really, But the point is he was a terrible man. He dug his knee into my back from across the room. But I defended him, not in court, but a deposition. And are you Facebook fronts? He just invited me to play Candy Crush saga.

Do people really invite people that play that or is it just like some algorithm that just thing?

I don't know. Anytime there's an old lady that's my friend on Facebook, usually that they invite me to play Candy Crush or you will blitz and that's so I don't they do invite me though, along.

With a group of makes you feel wanted.

I just I want to talk, right, I just want to apologize for that boring story about that.

It was fine. I mean, I've got a boring Grateful Dead story. Like I never had heard them until I was like eighteen, because that dumb song came out Touch of Gray, right, yeah, yeah, which remember.

The video and oh yeah it was just like skeletons, robotic skeletons that were made badly and I will get.

Back, Yeah, yeah, I will get fine. And I'm like, this is the way it was for this.

You know, we used to sit around and watch MTV all day long. But if that came on, that was like bathroom break.

Yeah it was horrible.

And like my cousin, I would have liked the worst music. I mean, I still do like some of the worst music of all time, but I really would have liked the worst music of all time grown up if it wasn't for my cousin, who was like badass. But like, remember that Grateful Dead video comes on about like thirty seconds into it.

He just goes.

Boomer boomer tripe like baby boomer tripe.

Weird.

Yeah, I don't think it was a phrase. What what jumped into his head?

It's so hard work, not what you might have.

He would like when there were when we would be at mister Gaddie's and they would would show MTV that there would be like a video by like you know, Nick Kershaw or something and it would be over and my cousin would just yell out, you'll get him next time, you know, or stuff like that. He was he was real, like he's just into rock, you know, like the good stuff, the who ye Zeppelin, now.

Art do you think Do you think you like music or comedy more?

Yes? Yes, moving on?

Uh no, that would be that's like Sophie's choice. But with like two babies you want to keep, you know, you have to kill.

Both babies, but you have to figure out which one is going to die humanly?

Oh ship, and which I'd kill comedy the least.

You just like Mary Carroll, but with babies, but with your hobbies. Okay, I like it now.

Comedy is a profession, Karen. I know it's not just my hobby.

Sorry, I know you made the hobby is anyone making money off of it. It doesn't seem like a way you could.

Actually Louis is in a black T shirt every thirty minutes doing a special, So.

That's that's crazy. He's he after he talks to girls into watching him mastery. Yeah, that's right, calling people out, you did it, or at least referencing stories that I've heard.

Or just repeating yeah, yeah, just repeating.

That's how much he's into the work of Bill Cosby. Okay, whatever, I like Luis too.

He's the best answer.

We just I would like comedy the least, even though it's the label that pays me. Yes, I would like go for music because you could live without comedy.

It would suck, right, But that's a really good point. But you'd still have word out.

Does that count?

That's probably, But it's true.

You could live without comedy, but were without music would be like, you know, I don't what it's like for most people that just listen to horrible music.

Yeah, yeah, I don't realize that it. I get depressed when I don't like For a long time, I didn't have a stereo and I wasn't listening to music. And it wasn't until I started again that I realized it made me happy. It fired in doorphins. It didn't really do that. And I'm listening to comedy. Isn't that weird?

No, that fires you jealousy endorphins? Ye me as a or like the I should have been doing more direct.

Inspired by the good people, but it just seems like, you know, most of the people's I don't know, there's just so much.

Of it now.

Well, the people that you like, you've heard their stuff before, and then people that are new. Oftentimes it just you know, the routine, you know, the rhythm.

Yeah, I feel like when I.

Listen to comedy, you you know there's a setups, you know, like there's you know, all the pieces and you're analytical brain just because you've been listening to it for so long. It's just isn't the same kind of straight enjoyment.

I think about that all the time when I'm listening to music, too, Like, would I like this band if I were a musician? Whe is dissecting the whatever time signatures? Is that a word? Yeah?

If you're Amah the Jamal and you're like listening to some forty one, yeah, I feel like probably that's probably a great because.

I'll know people that are good musicians, they've done it their whole life. But I know they like bad music. And I know that I like music that it's good. But you I feel like I would have a leg to stand on because I only paid played trombone for a couple of years, you know, and we aren't listening to trombone music.

I mean, that would be great if you did just stand on one leg while you played the trombone. Though I only have one leg to stand on and play the trombone. That would have been a good gimmick. You have to play it, yeah, you have to. You have to play it and stand on it and stand on one leg. Well, I was just thinking of standing on one leg playing the trombone.

Now. I can't stop thinking of if the guy from def Leppard had been a trombone.

Player and he had a trombone armine, would he would be the party?

They would have had them made a special trombone You're right, they should, which is like a trombone stand.

I guess that's not really that special.

What if you have already?

They just get a guy to hold the trombone actually a lot.

But what if you were a robot with a trombone arm, most popular robot ever, or.

The one that everyone goes, oh no, he's here again.

Well, you would have to the mouthpiece would be somewhere near your arm pit. Yeah, so you'd have to also have a robot neck to bend over and blow into your armpit.

Who's to say, I don't.

I mean I maybe your robot trombone arm is a different design than mine.

Yeah, it sounds like it.

But the one I'm imagining starts at the base of your shoulder and sticks out, meaning you know, I guess you know what now that I'm holding out my arm as if we're an imaginary trombone. It would be a left handed trombone, but the mouthpiece would line up perfectly. Good idea, Karen.

Thank you, finally sorry.

I know this is how it is for a lot of female robot designers.

You have the male process it you really talk it through guys.

Hear about the guy in the German factory for making volkswagons. He got crushed by a giant robot arm that he was repairing, and it said, I feel better now me absorbed and crushed his body. What very Germany. It's very true.

A huge on cut cock. That's Germans, guys. I might not know they.

Have more sensitivity because of their their.

Cocked against Jews.

Hey wait, that got dark.

Okay, Karen, did you say Germany? I say Nazis Germany.

Nazi Lazi.

Can't we just had say way my fuck, I say neo crypto Nazi.

Oh, I guess you just can't have a circumcision Germany conversation anymore without Nazis.

Nazis so true.

My mom called them Nazis, and she also called their logo Swaskika and I'll never forget that.

She also said, why did she sound like she's from like Chicago instead of where?

Yeah?

What if it was Nancies?

My mom used to call him Ronald Reagan and we'd be like, every night you watch the news and they say Reagan every night you hear it.

It's like, I think it might be.

My aunt, my dad's sister. I'll never forget it, said uh, And I was a kid. She goes, do you want these Bob Dyland albums?

And I.

Asked to be a reconcilent. I wanted to be.

Divorced David Bowie my mom. My mom used to say, David Bowie.

Every time I've done International waters and I'm just plugging another podcast that I do the great the UK people say David Bowie and they know better, Howie, that's right, Bowie Bowie.

I hate that.

I don't like it either.

There's three different ways to say rightie bowiew like Jim Bowie and the rabbit way and oh.

Everyone's riffing and someone stops to go, wait, what did you just say? And then you have to say it and it was so stupid that you have to say, oh, I'm just so stupid.

Well that's where I could come in and help outis and I was having guys. I'll be honest.

Look, I wanted to go back to def Leppard having trombone solos, but you know I can't.

It's too gone at the moment. So I can't wait to bring back the grateful dead stuff. I can't wait. I just made a vein pop up in my temple.

I really do. Miss.

I feel very lucky because I think Chip and I are the same exact age.

I think, am I younger than you? When it came out?

Like I was like twelve and we literally I remember watching the first day of MTV and being like yes, and then.

That's all we did.

Like if you would go to a family party, all the kids would be in the TV room watching MTV and you just laid around watching music videos because you couldn't believe it was just a brand new thing.

I remember day Thriller Premier Forget It Yea from the TV.

Over and over my sister would have She would have friends over and they would wait and record, often with a VCR, but wait for Deuran Duran to come on, and when it came on, they would scream, like a footage of the Beatles. They were screaming, and I was like, oh my god, I was in the next ron. I just didn't understand.

Yeah, Dandan was are like Backstreet Boys for it really was.

I don't know, I go, I go so far to say the Beatles of the eighties, because who are the Beatles of the eighties if not Duran Duran.

That's very true.

I mean it's not.

All four of them wrote, well, see the thing is it breaks down like the thing is always The Beatles were the Beatles of the sixties, right, Queen Queen was the Beatles of the seventies, because all four of them wrote songs, all four of them had hits. All four of them have personalities, big hits, okay.

And then in the eighties though, who is it? I think the Monkeys were the Beatles of the eighties. A lot of people don't know this. It's true. They did Pull It their album Pull.

It That the movie where Mickey Dolans's daughter starred in it with Tony Danza's.

Is that she's out of It's so funny. No one knows that you guys both for it and the and I think it was like the poster was a leggy girl, which is, you know, she's supposed to be a teenager, but she's like a leggy girl in a mini squirt ripping up a picture of Tony Danza. It's very inventive.

Yea.

I A lot of people miss MTV playing videos. I'm one of them. It was real important to me. And uh, and I didn't like when they started showing reality shows and everything, but there was that middle time when they showed cool animation and then shows like Austin Stories, which television was so ahead of its time. And yeah, no, I'm.

That's really that was very professionally.

Sho Chip was in Austin Stories from Stories. One of the originals just got in the car. We kicked out the old chip Pope. It was I don't realize how long ago that was until I see someone regram a photo of you guys in your Lee Jians that were baggier than Jenko. I think that was a gunshot, but it is the fifth It's funny. You live in La long enough you learn how to discern between fireworks and gunshots, but you also learned to react to them the same,

Either someone died or liberty. Liberty, either way.

Same death.

Isn't it the same? If you go back far enough when you were on MTV Austin Stories.

When Austin Stories got put on the air on MTV, was that a big deal for you because of your MTV background?

As that was a big deal.

It was a big deal anyway, really, because you know, you're a comic and you're gonna be on TV and.

You're in Austin. Yeah, it's just weird. Never happened.

Yeah, it was an odd thing, but it was a big deal just because of MTV. And I remember there was this picture and TV Guide or something that was just like, oh, it just was like it was weird because it was a picture of everything in like teen pop culture that led up to Austin Stories. So it was like a flow chart and it just said and it had all these pictures. So it was like Nobe Kills.

It was weird. It started like way in the you know, in the.

Sixties or something, and then went in through like the Breakfast Club and then went in through like you know, reality Bites, Reality Bites, yeah, and Slacker and all that, and then went to like Austin like all these roads. It's awesome stories. I'm like, wow, I don't know, this is such a big deal. And I saw that page and I was just like, I guess I'm done.

I don't know, like I became a came out.

I was like, Okay, I'm twenty six and it's over.

That's great.

My life can end now, you know. But it just kept going.

It was it was such and how many seasons A couple? Three?

Oh, just I wish just one.

One really and it's on YouTube. People, if you haven't seen Austin Stories, watch it and also realize that it was nineteen ninety seven or eight, and.

I remember being at a party with Michael iam Black and like right before Ustince was about to come on, and he was just like, yeah, they'll bother you a lot and everything, but once the show comes on, you'll just be fine. Once the show gets on, everything will be great and there you go. And I always remember him like being wrong. I'm sure he doesn't remember that, but yeah, I mean he was because he was just

Yeah, that was part of their song.

I didn't like The State because there was too many people, and I felt like I loved kids in the hall so much. I felt like I I had to pick a team, and so I had to be against anyone that was interesting.

I didn't watch The State.

I loved the State. Yeah that's great.

You're a company man, that's why.

Yeah, No, I thought what thought said?

Hey wait, it wasn't on until we went on until like two or three.

White fat cat in a suit, I bet our listened everything, Yes, sir, mister.

To the man.

Then when I met Tom Lennon and like, blew my mind. He was like the nicest guy in the world. I was just like, oh my god, what a lovely guy.

You know.

I met Tom Lennon at Largo one night.

Nice business.

Yes, I was so excited to meet Tom Lennon. And when I said nice to meet you, he was like, Karen, we've met several times in the.

Nineties, and I want that's it happens to.

Me a lot because I was a big drunk in the nineties, but that one broke my heart, especially because I was like, I bet I was really rude to.

Tom Lennon in the nineties.

Horrible memory, such a Do you guys remember where you were? I didn't know that that would call all that.

Hey, look we take the good, we take the bad. Chris, you know this. We take them both, and there you have them.

Thank you. I didn't want to watch a lot of TV in the eighties. Do you guys remember island where you were when Lennon was shot? That was a dumb Tom Lennard from Russia.

Tom Tom Lennon has been shot.

Yeah, they put it. They thought it was a blank and was ousted.

Yea in Russia.

Oh really, yeah, brag.

Oh god, I've been to Lemon's parking.

I thought, that's what you're gonna do to me, So then I did it to you.

Who do you like more Lenin or Stalinsky? It's funny? Now, who's staling? Oh god? I sometimes I feel like my joke style is they are from just from the Mountains?

Tell I was I was stalling. I was in that, I was stalling, And then I got the Trotsky. Hello, that's a good one.

What are you doing? No, Chip? You posted a picture from.

On a podcast?

Yeah?

Good? Oh guys, let us know where we can listen to that? You guys on iTunes? Oh, you have to come comedy All things. If there's any you can think of that as comedic that isn't on All Things comedy, we will give you your money back.

We will give you a certain kind of mattress.

I thought you had really gotten a job at a restaurant. Chip you posted, Yeah, yeah, I thought you really ran into her and nice like, I don't want him to be working a real food daily or whatever.

You well, I think that's gonna the kind of respect my comedy inspirers is that people would see that and go, oh, he is working at a restaurant. So you know, I think it's out of the realm. I got no that guy.

Finally I got angry. That's not what I'm saying. You're putting words in my thoughts. Thoughts on my mouth.

I posted a picture after the gay marriage ruly and I posted a picture of me and my television, like we finally can get car. I saw that too, and my LG was real LG and like my aunt she was like, who's LG.

It's so great?

Are you going to come here to have the wedding?

Oh, that's the worst thing.

And I was like, I could have done this like two years ago in this state.

Patrick Keene, do you guys he's been on the show before. He's one of my friends. He posted he was in a commercial or sketcher or something and had a daughter in it, and he posted a photo of this him and this fifteen year old girl who happened to look a lot like him. She was playing his daughter. But it was like the casting was lucky, and he just said it was a long heartfelt thing he deserved. He set himself up. But he just said, after fifteen years,

Because like everyone wants to think the best, you know, Yeah, everybody's intentions are very pure except for two assholes. Yeah, and so you know, and everybody wants to be like, oh, it's great. So like when my aunt did, I couldn't be like to holler at my aunt because she exactly.

Yeah, people get happy.

And I think because you know, people like everybody thinks that everyone's family or lives, like I've been put together so perfectly, Like your parents meet and date and then they get married and then they have babies or whatever. But so many families got slapped together by mistake and like,

I believe that to be true.

Yeah, relationship views are just night and day now between you know, me and the twenty year olds I go out with.

I'll tell you that.

It's crazy because when you're a kid used to think, oh, well, I don't want to I'm in love, and they don't think that at all anymore, right, They just because like you know, when we're kids, it's like, hey, it's Duran Duran and they're singing about romance in their suits on a boat.

What crazy?

Well, you know, and like and then like their music is like you know, oh it's Rihanna and she gets beat up by her boyfriend. You know, there's just more like reality. I think that they that's okay to deal with putting out.

Gold well and also we are we went from watching MTV and like Cyndi Laupper or whatever, straight to the AIDS epidemic. Oh yeah, so I think like the way kids.

Grow up these days, or like gay two gay too, the AIDS epidemic.

I don't know what did she said, straight to the AIDS epidemic More like gay to it.

Ut did she say that just for a promotion for Live Aid or no? That was for fun Karen in the car, Okay, I thought you were quoting Cindy Lauder.

Is it Cyndy Lauper?

No, that's the way my dad.

I thought it was Lauper back when she's Cindy Island. I. I always thought Live Aid was for you know, because it's live and the AID. There's an ass at the end of AIDS which ruined a gum I think there's a gum.

Mercan It was a It was a diet candy called AIDS. Yeah.

Oh man, they went spelled different.

They went up. That was spelled You gotta make sure you don't name your product after a future disease.

You just got it, you do, yes, remember that drink Skabies?

Do you remember the cartoon muppets Scabies Muppets? Yeah, when they were younger, you.

Muppet and all the first just falling off of the puppets.

That's when they got lazy tending to those.

That's when they were the feebles. Do you remember the Feebles? Oh the way the movies Peter Jacks with the Yeah, puppets that had aid.

That was some dark ship. Yeah, like right in the eighties. It was Ladies an adult he had made Dead Alive, a gory horror movie. That's one of my favorite.

I think this was before Dead Alive though really yeah, yeah, like the one before Dead Alive.

I think it's after anyway. The it was Peter Jackson, but there was only phone we could look up. Yeah, and everyone's from New Zealand and their puppets and they're having sex and uh, it's very crude, and but it's puppets, so it's very watchable. Rotten tomatoes.

Wait sorry, then the puppets get aids, one of them.

One puppet gets aids, you know, I mean there were also is beheadings and fighting and you know, it's a very adult orient it's puppets, but don't these aren't your kids.

Puppet It was like, you know, back the it was backstage at the Muppet Show. Basically it was the idea and.

Did the puppets look like the Land of Confusion Genesis video? Puppets were like really overly horrifying face, they.

Were really grotesque. They were cute, but then when they were off stage they were like not cute.

Yeah, and then like like puppets without makeup and it started clever. Yeah, like that that started became the Larry Sanders show. I think is just behind the scenes or Sports Center, just do the reality guys.

Did somebody that looks like a puppet?

It's so funny. I always read that, Like every time I read about speaking of Larry Sanders, I always read about Judd Apatow, like learning from Larry Sanders on that show to go the funniest thing is the real thing that would happen. And so I saw that train Wreck movie, which is very funny, but it's just like the whole third act.

I was like, what happened that good advice that you were just giving?

So I feel like that might happen a lot where it's like you do the real thing that would happen. It's like, yeah, but that ain't the real thing that would happen.

You know.

Maybe it's movies is the problem, you know what I mean? You got to have like some upbeat, dumb ending.

Or the studio won't let you be too real.

Yeah, that's one thing I won't know.

It's not I don't think it's the quote's fault, is what I'm saying.

Whose fault.

Is it.

Dumb dumb people that that can't handle the truth.

I always like the alternate ending on DVD extras more because I'm smart. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm totally.

I'm really hot, and no one else is.

It's okay, it's okay, it's hot.

I don't like it. That's upsetting.

Well, it doesn't mean anything. It doesn't mean you're sick.

You know that was I feel like I just heard your mom's voice come through you.

Right. No, my mom would be like, maybe you're probably sick and dying. Probably, Oh god, Oh why are we raised in a paranoia in this house?

They look to your right, Chris, it's a Texas license plate. Oh why does it look photoshop? Why did their license plate look fake?

Yeah?

They look fake, don't.

Because it's flat. There's no indentation with the numbers or or extentation whatever. There's no what do you call that. They aren't embossed, they aren't in bombed. There are no embossment. They see they it's cheap. I guess right. They have lazy prisons in the prisons in California. They're like chink chink, and they're hammering. They're making the letter. He raised a bumpy Sorry, they're like chin chin chin.

Then they're tapping, They're like ching chong.

R Oh, we just lost ten less. San Francisco went through so much.

Did I apologize? I'd like to take this time to apologize for saying ching chong.

I'd like to. I think mine was worse because I'm not even making sound effects.

Yeah, exactly, everyone's so sensitive in this car.

I know I kind of wasn't listening and I just made the first sound that seemed to fit with every all the other words I was hearing.

This car was in England, we would be doing minstrel. We would be in blackface right now, he's around.

Is that okay over there?

I don't maybe it still is. I feel like it was like two years ago, so I mean, they don't.

It's hard to get over owning everybody, you know, when you don't anymore.

I don't know if you guys know Ryan Stout, but one of his early jokes was a great one, and I think it went. I hate racism so much that I don't even like the word vinegar. We love that. Yeah, I didn't say it right, but but I'm not willing to put the emphasis I'm not willing to put. Karen did not like the joke.

I didn't understand that. I was still.

Arms. What if I said vinegar without the vin part? Karen yikes, that's the joke. I don't even like three.

It just shows that Karen is that not racist? That's right, Yeah, that she wouldn't even make that association.

I've let me stay.

I only got that joke four years afterwards.

I want everyone to know, yes, it was. It was one, as they call it in the circuit. And then the business on the Way Homer, I believe kind you mean the Iliad?

That was a long way Homer.

That's an on the way Homer. The odyssey.

So exhausting. Sorry, So do you still pick music over comedy?

Yeah?

I would totally pick music over comedy. Is that a central question of your podcast?

Right?

No?

No, I just brought it back up young. His comedy can be such drudgery. Sometimes it's like we're all trapped in doing it. It's like, uh, is what that.

Made me think of? Here's the word I'm thinking of.

Yeah, our friend Hark Krimmer, he was just I always liked his in I still do like his insight. But I always liked his insight on music, and I'm sure anything I say, he'll go No, that's not what I said.

You're saying it wrong.

But anyway, I do like the insight on his music, which he would just be the difference between performing comedy and performing music and just loving performing music, and just how performing comedy is horrible because in music, if you play a song and no one likes it, you still had the pleasure playing that song, and it's just kind of irrelevant to where people respond or not, whereas in comedy.

The opposite, Yes, exactly, every performance affects your enjoyment of that joke.

Ye, what about with a combination, like when you did our o mance you're r omance.

That's good because character I used to like that because it didn't really matter. That doesn't really matter if people are laughing in a way.

I you know, I thought it was great.

The first time I did that, maybe like twenty people were really into it and the other people were kind of like, what did you first do it at mbar? No, it was downtown at like an art show or something. So but you put out an album Zach Gallifanakas and I'm not dropping names and glory days.

That's the biggest thing.

Zach Galifakas was sitting on the front row and he was dying, and then at the end he said, Hey, keep doing.

That forever, so it's great. So yeah, So I was like, so, are you going to keep doing it forever? Well?

No, I feel like I've let him down.

But that person is jaywalking in some sort of a halatosis emergency. Bring his mouth. Wow, it seemed like he was jaywalking and also concerned about his breath at the same time.

Wait, so in talking about our romance, why don't you explain really quickly what that?

Yes?

Oh, it was like a character that I used to do. That was from the eighties and he was Britain's top selling singer in the eighties for like one week in nineteen eighty one or something.

Like a little bit of that song I can't it's not the same.

Yeah, But there's that one where you you just keep talking about things. It sounds like one Night in Bangkok combined with something else Good Lady Boy.

Like popcorn. I can't do it. It's so funny, guys, what if you wrapped them the illusion? The three people who like that character.

Can you just state the lyrics?

Yes, I honestly, that's not want. It's not okay sing sing a song, Karen bang Cock, I sing one of your songs.

We did do that.

We did do that. Hey, we're on an airplane. Tell me a joke and I'm sorry we did. Yeah, that's okay.

I was just your irritating aunt Marie, and I don't give a ship.

I like it. I like that.

You guys remember that.

Because it's it seems like something you could shout out.

I might.

Maybe I should do that more because it is fun to do and it's not so, you know, reliant on the audience. I remember doing it one time. This is another person in the front row. The name name dropping, but it's not like I really know these people.

I mean, let's guess.

First, guess who is in the front row watching me do our romance.

It was Julianne Moore, the Great Redheaded Acts.

Oh my god.

She wasn't wearing pants, Oh my god, like she was ironing nights in the short cuts mean.

She did a monologue with no pants on.

You think like music, think who's in there?

You am the best at the day.

You are good and I'm doing my dumb jokes and just thinking, wow, I've been doing these dumb jokes for one in front of one of the greatest songwriters of all time.

She has to sit through this dumb music thing.

And she loved it.

She liked it.

Yeah, I mean, I don't know if she loved it.

I don't know.

I couldn't look at her. But then yeah, but then later I found I heard her on a comedy Bang Bang or Death Ray or something, and they had and when Scott used to play music and he played romance, and and she said that that my fake British accent was way better than hers ever.

Once that's that's nice. That's the best compliment you can get. I guess you have a good fake British accent.

I did a show one night and Maria McKee, who is the lead singer of Lone Justice and one of my favorite singer songwriters of all time, perhaps my number one.

But above Harriet Wheeler from The Sunday Oh Shoots. Okay, I mean it's okay.

License nugger.

It's difficult because their bones, but you know, so she came to a show at the Fake Gallery and so I was doing a song This was when I was doing the songs with my friend Dawn. We made up a bunch of fake musical songs and literally, like halfway through, I just forgot the whole band because I couldn't believe. I couldn't get out of my own head that I

But it's weird, how like when it doesn't A lot of stuff means nothing to anyone else. Think, yes, exactly, not weird about life.

I think we're about to find out if you can get ticketed for podcasting when you go through a sobriety checks.

Sobriety check, I think.

So. I've been wanting to go through these one of these sober for the first time, and I'm pretty excited.

Okay, now it's not just me, because there's so much I know.

It's hot, I'm warm, and I'm sorry you guys are sorry.

At least I'm not very menopausal.

That John song I'm a Warm guy.

That was my song.

But I also feel like maybe my car is gonna overheat. Oh okay, I mean I don't think so of it.

It's just a lot of certainly there's heat.

Do you know that song by Morrissey called what Now?

Little Man?

By the way, I do not know that people when you perform, well, it's just this whole thing. I don't know what they you know, because it could be an abstraction, but it could be a thing from his reel life. But it's just about remembering watching someone on some show when you were a little kid, and then you meet them in real life and.

No one remembers you.

The horse is all like, but I remember you. Yeah, And I just feel like that's ninety five percent of my life. This is the Morrissey character in that song, not the forgotten person. That's the forgotten part is probably five percent.

Line No, no, But you have a you are a walking encyclopedia of references that I some I feel really proud when you say something and I know what you're talking about because I know that you your your catalog is deep and obscure and uh, and now I sound like a doctor, and we're gonna have to remove I've never seen a catalog this deeper obscure. You have twelve weeks to learn new things, learn about news. We get it. It's organic, it's it's your anesthetic. Local is it? Where was it raised? Yes?

I remember being very excited when the lead singer of Go West followed me on Twitter.

Oh my god, yes, that would make me cream.

They were amazing.

I don't please do the think so like this.

It was all important. It was all over his resenting.

You is the king of wishful thinking. Go West, catch up to you, guys. Yeah you can, I know, I will.

Set this ship's not sea thinking.

He could hit those high notes, had a really powerful voice.

And he looked kind of like he looked like a sensitive Huey Lewis. It was like if Huey Lewis had a brother who wore fringe leather jackets.

He was hot.

He was like in that British thing of like are they gay or just British. Yeah.

The first time I saw George Michael Wham a Wham video which was to wake Me Up before you Go Go video, It was a Jennifer Donman's slumber party, and I remember all of it because the second he hit the screen, I couldn't figure out if I was in love with him or if I wanted to be as pretty as him, right because it was George Michael.

He was just like all teeth and like feathered hair.

That was the first as a kid, I'm like, I'm this guy is handsome, and I wish I looked like him. I wish I had that jacket and I wish I had that as you know what.

The thing and the moral of the story, Chris, you know what, he hated himself. It seems like he really hated himself in that face.

It's weird, and get weird. Stop doing it, you idiot. She wanted. That's awful, I yelled.

I called her.

We were all just about to be on the laugh factory, God laughs.

They were about to be on that billboard.

That was right by the last We were going to get a triple. Perhaps maybe I don't do the laugh factor that much.

I've only got to do.

I think I did it for a showcase.

Nate Ship, Yeah, I got so.

Maybe we wouldn't get on the billboard.

Here's my best heckle ever, that's the.

Drop of my blood on the fillboard. Oh at least I'm featuring.

I used to do a joke and it was it started out of me getting something in a store in San Francisco and then the owner going, uh, you can have everything for free, chips, candy, cigarettes, magazines, everything for free, which really happened to.

Me in real life.

Is that Sally Kellerman.

This was during my sell cream ranch.

And but by the way, her house is called Hidden Valley rancho Ix. My friend used to be your assistant. Okay, sorry, that's hilarious.

Well, no, I'm just saying that.

The best heckle I ever got was I started doing that joke and some huge black man in the back of the room.

Goes bullshit.

And then because if you remember, what I had said was that I got everything for free, and then I just went, you're right, sir, and I left the stage because I was like, I'm not going to get screamed at while you're right.

This is all bullshit. Everything I'm about to do is total bullshit. So I might love.

That's my favorite hackle. Huh Uh, that's this at all true. I thought I came to a stand up truth show. I love you. Leaving the stage.

I never have the balls to leave a stage. I would just be like, I'm going to get through it, and I still keep going and you are like that.

I'm that way too. I think the times that I have I'm like, I can't do this, it's not worth it, and I've gotten off stage. I beat myself up. Even if it was a horrible audience. I hate it.

Well, I respect it so much. I've seen it. I've never been would never be.

Able to do it.

I just I'm a lot like a British Royalty trying to do stand up where I can't even believe I'm there in the first place, much less be relegated to I've seen that.

Yeah, I've a show with Natasha Lazara one time where she was just like, you know, it's a long story, but you know she's just at some point just gues this isn't no.

Just left. Yeah, one day I'll have the courage to do that. Well, we're I think we're about to run out of I'm worried about this last little.

Oh yeah, we're over.

Yeah, that was that was a long drive. Well, it was a great drive. Ship. Thank you, Chip. You'll never you guys been to stop disappointing me. Sorry start, I'm so bad with goodbyes.

Let's make this tonight.

Please, don't in your sleep now, that's not going to happen because I erased it from the universe. Don't choke on your vomit now, that will never happen to you. We both love you great. I love you guys too.

Mostly on Instagram. Insta is that your Twitter for dumb people? Twitter without all them words?

Your handle?

Yeah?

On Instagram? Get up in there? How thousands of free likes? You see all my real followers and my ghost followers. I got a lot of ghost followers. Mean, I don't know those these people that come on like dinsheim Ron guying is following you, and I'm like, oh.

What is that?

And I'll just be like, give him my legs.

I'm your old partner, Chip Hope. I thought it was that kind of ges. I have great timing this episode speaking.

He has been a real gulash of comedy and I loved it.

And who's ready for more? Show to me, he continued, dot.

Dot right now, this next comic has done clubs and colleges all over the country.

Put your hands together. Why am I doing? Fred Schniner because I want Chip Pop Peterson. Yeah, there's a rock and that's a bush. Everybody, thank you. Now it's in the room.

I met Fred Scheiner once and told my did impression of him, and he just went.

Yeah, no, was this response a lot of people do. I'm gonna go stub my toe on a butter bean.

What's that on your head?

A wig? It looks like a hat, but like a cloud. I don't know. I'm doing's material. Now that's when you know where we're down. Let's go in and oh.

That's the best one. What's not on your head?

I think this brings us to the conclusion of this episode of do you need a ride?

Thank you for Oh wait, Katy Perry's manager lives right there. Isn't it weird that he doesn't have a better house? No, not that one, but that one still equally.

It's still in one of those apartments.

I mean, I mean, and the off chances he hears this, he's awesome. But I mean, maybe this is just like his apartment here or something. I figure he probably has always.

Like Los Angeles.

Yeah, and then he's got a ranch style house up in Montana because he's got.

That Katie perrymoney. Are we being attacked? But he's lived here a long time.

I just realized Katy Perry and Zoe they shut on Nail, are different people. They look a lot alike anyway, that that's a great way to let's not keep that part in it.

No, no, well, let's not out Katy Perry's managers.

Oh, we don't know where we are.

Yeah, we never said anything about but it doesn't matter.

We will do that. At the bottom of the podcast, you can see where Chip's address is if you want me and I just learned the difference between Blake Lively and Caleb Deshanel. You've been listening to Do You Need a Ride? D y n A R.