Ep. 47 - Michelle Biloon

Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home?

Either way, we want to be.

There, doesn't matter how much baggage you claim.

Give us time and a Turmano and gabe A.

We want to send you off InStyle.

We wanna welcome you back home.

Tell us all about it.

We scared her?

Was it fine? Now? Porn? Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need ride?

With Karen and Chris welcome? Do you need a ride? This is Chris Phairbanks is my.

Name, and this is Karen Kilgareth is my name.

I don't think I've ever messed up my own name, or have.

I I've never heard you mess up your own name. But I feel like you're holding down a lot of things in this podcast as the sound man.

Yeah, but driving. We all know that driving is more difficult than just looking at a thing.

Oh, driving so easy you barely have to pay attention?

Did I personally? I'm just that's my new gag. I forgot to say occasionally, I said, have I done that? Messed up my own name? On purpose?

Joke?

Yet that's what I meant to say.

Oh, so you messed up the question of asking about messing up your name.

Yes, yes, it's uh, there's the first time for everything, and that one was unsuccessful. My name is Chris Fairbanks. This is Do you Need to Ride.

My name is Karen Kilgara, and it's still Do.

You Need to Ride. Yes, we have not changed the podcast name since the failure of my initial name joke.

Although if you do have a suggestion of a better name for this podcast, you know, we're open minded individuals.

You'd love to hear.

Oh what, you're so smart. There was two women on the wrong side of the street riding bikes.

Riding bikes in the in.

The lanes, so nonchalantly they were, and they didn't even recognize the fact that they almost got hit by cars.

I thought I drove onto a bike lane just there, but no, it was just two ladies.

And they they will leave. They will leave that situation. That's what's frustrating. They will leave that situation having learned nothing because they stared at the cars like they were in the wrong.

Yeah, because they're probably from elsewhere else. So they're like, we're going to ride our bikes to the beach on what is a small highway.

I that was very frustrating.

That was an almost it was almost murdered.

Happened right at the corner of something in Lincoln. We are head to now do south on Lincoln towards lax where we are going to pick up Michelle Balloon.

Michelle Balloon one of my favorite people, favorite comedians, but favorite people.

She's one of my early favorite people. Before you ever even knew.

Her, Karen, I got into her in the late eighties.

She was just a futuristic apparition to you, and I was already knowing her in the flesh.

Now where did you meet her?

Austin, Texas?

Is that where she started stand up?

Yes? I remember one time I was hosting the open mic, something I do not enjoy doing. Running the list weirdos show up. This one guy used to show up. You'd do a Christopher walk and then turn around and pee in a bucket.

Oh on streets.

Yeah, that was his act.

That is funny.

Some mentally ill street guys would come in and they'd do their hold up qu cards and there was a lot of strange people that showed up to the open mic. My I just whistled like a Southerner once I'm talking about Texas. I can't do it.

You're like the little pigeon, that little pigeon that blows.

Up his own feather, the red Neck pigeon.

You know the cartoon where there's a little or as a quail and every time he says an ass, he blows his little feather up the Oh.

Wow, No, I would enjoy him even now. And it's I was.

Just gonna say, what would an open might be without the mentally ill contingent that always comes in and makes it so much more interesting?

I guess yeah, I really don't enjoy having to control that environment. Anyway. Michelle came one night and she was like she had already been a stand up for years, and it was like her first time. And I remember saying, you are good. You should keep coming back, and she did. And so what I'm saying is it's yet another career like Brendan Walsh's that I started. I should be getting cuts of these incomes.

You're like the Ed McMahon of Austin. Were you just hey, heyo?

What did he do? Heyo?

Yeah?

He just yelled hey all the time.

Hey, Hi, hi, karate boo yah.

Carson Daddio Carson giant envelope doorstep. Uh, he just said things.

Have you ever seen Ed McMahon. I guess not.

I guess I'm creating another person in my head. But yes, Michelle and I started stand.

Up together, and she's great.

I always heard her name, which is one of those great comedy names that you can't ask for a better one.

Yeah, she didn't. She didn't make it up. Her real name is Balloon with an eye.

It is not a stage name, Balloon with an eye, right like Belond Balloon Balloon.

I do not know. I think it's iland.

But she she looks so much like my She looks like she could be a sister with me and my sister.

She looks like a midstep between me and my sister.

Her do eyes and everything. Yeah, it's weird that I never even really noticed that.

Yeah, and she but she has she has a lot of my sister's features. So like the last time we all did Little Joy together, she was on stage and I had this huge wave of like I loved her, Like I just had this huge wave of like familiarity and like I told you that where I was just kind of like so it may it was because I was kind of homesick. I think I hadn't seen my family in a really long time. But it was also just that thing of like watching somebody like I don't know. It's when you know people.

Are like to and so you were watching her and not unlike in cartoons where her body turned to a chicken's body. Her body turned into your old house with your family inside.

That's right, but it's still I was. It just made me hungry for chicken. Oh yeah, that's what made me.

They made good chicken at your old home.

Oh my god.

My hometown is the egg basket of the world, or was at one point.

Well we all know that.

Do you egg baskets?

We should drive up for the Butter and Eggs Day parade, which is sometime at the end of the mooing Oh is.

That just after the water mill and seed spitting contest.

You know what, if you're gonna be rude about it, you're not invited.

I would like to go. I apologize.

Okay, I'm glad we solved that.

Well, are you you should let Michelle mill this? Did you?

No?

No, don't tell her, Okay.

Okay, she'll just get all stuck up people.

You know what, and she will. That's one thing I haven't mentioned about Michelle yet. She is a stuck up.

She's so stuck that word I think I did tell her that night. And one's one of those things where.

Yes, how many how many bodies?

Let the bodies hit the floor? For Christ's sake?

Is that disturbed? I got? I should have been in a metal band.

No, that was amazing. Careful you watch your instrument. Here's here comes another fire truck. Well, oh no, this is it's a five alarm fire.

Oh god, I mean, they just keep coming that.

At least we know there's gonna be delicious chili that comes out of it.

That was sincere laugh that I got insecure about halfway through.

Did you hear that? I meant it?

And then I all that happens all the time.

It's embarrassing.

Well, I make people laugh with things that are really dumb because of salesmanship.

That's exactly right.

Well, Also, I know how much I'm gonna laugh with you, so I'm just constantly. I just I'm so I feel so much freer to laugh when you're talking.

Don't just be open, just open.

I can trust you. At the end, you're gonna deliver something that's laugh worthy.

Every other one. It's gonna just be good delivery, bad idea. But I don't know. Five alarm chili is a thing I've heard of.

It's a real thing.

I've perhaps heard of that type of chili more than that type of for me. But your your dad was a fireman, and you grew up around that.

I grew up around child you.

Oh yeah, my house, we knew, people knew our house as the city's chili basket.

Oh do you have the beans and hot Sauce parade every year?

Yes?

Is this playing going to land on us?

It's going to rest gently on the top of your fit and we were going to take them the rest of away like a space shuttle.

Do you think audio picked up that?

Oh? I so, I hope pretty d I definitely heard it, and I'd like to think it was through these earphones.

I was gonna say, though, I did tell I think that night at Little Joy, I tried to express that feeling I had about Michelle to Michelle, and she was in such that Michelle balloon Way was like ohh And I was like just looking at you up there and I just love you.

You're the best.

She No, she's she I remember that when because we had been friends for a few years, and uh, you know, like the first time I'm a hugger person and I remember hugging her and I was like, oh, man, maybe where she grew up they don't like hug all willy nilly. Yeah, so that's what it is.

But now, what what was the answer did you ask?

No?

I know, I never I you know, I think that she's just tougher than me. But once you break her down, she's a she's a bucket of sacrain.

She is from Wisconsinny bucket.

Yeah. She went to school in Madison, Yes, and I think grew up in Madden. I'm not sure I should know.

Those Wisconsin ights there they pretend to be cold, but deep down inside they're warm.

I guess, so I don't know that one.

Do you mean the weather?

I'm not sure. I was just talking. I do that a lot. You let the words you follow lord, most people do.

And I it's when someone starts a story and they're telling it all interestingly, and they're like, oh, and then that we're going to want to go behind this black hit man, and they're telling this story with all this emphasis, and then you realize halfway through, Oh this is going nowhere, and they don't know where it's going either. They're just delivering a story with intent. Yeah, but they at the end,

You got to throw a little something on there, yeah, yeah, a little dash of interest. Me and my sister do a thing.

I think I blame my sister for having this habit is that you tell a story and you you expect to get laughs in certain spots, and if you don't get the reaction that you ask for, you just retell the end of the story. So like you very quickly recap to try to get the laughter that you feel you deserved in the first place.

We do do that. That's a tactic.

I do it often.

And kind of like then they both my sister and I both will lean in and kind of stare at you.

So I went miles door. I saw the guy. He went out to my car and he spray painted it. And I said, I'll buy that for a dollar.

I'll buy that for a dollar.

Oh, up to my car and I say, I'll buy that for It was insane.

And then I actually gave him a dollar, you like, add something to.

It to see if that's what they're looking for. Do not do anything for you if I gave him money.

Yeah, you wanted it to get played out. Okay, well it's we are going to be This is gonna work out perfect as usual. And this has been a trend lately. Flights have come into Lax a half hour early. I don't know why they're doing this, all the different airlines. It's a conspiracy, yep, they say, oh, she will arrive at one now, twelve twenty eight, twelve eight. Anyway, I

And what airline is it?

I will let you know that, uh, and I'm looking it up now. She's outside baggage claim at terminal six, so continue in the direction you are, okay, right past the international arrival sign terminal six.

Okay.

I'm having heartburn right now, so excuse me if I'm a little speechless.

What's going on? Did you have something crazy?

There's never any rhyme or reason in my body pain.

It just occurs I see.

It's bad even if I just mentioned five alarm chili.

You need a little mailox.

Yeah, maybe I'm homesick.

Oh well, Michelle Balloon is going to be in the car party soon.

No with me. I see a turkey body, Yeah, yep.

We're a lot alike that way.

Yep, yep. You see people as their cartoon.

Old turkey body.

I'd kind of love it if that was like the new haunt is if your body reminded someone of a big roast turkey, as opposed to four pieces of celery laying adjacent to each other.

Oh, like if you drop them and it's like, oh, the prophecy has been told and the celery all makes a panagram? Is that what you're talking?

You know?

I was saying like that models look like four pieces of celery. Oh okay, with one maybe five one down the middle.

Is the body?

You said the new haunt? I immediately thought of ghosts and evil spirits?

Did I say haunt? I did?

Yeah you did? It was really out of place. No, I think, no, that's the new blank.

I don't remember what.

Luckily we're recording, it's okay. We don't have to panic until we're near terminal set. Okay, that's when we start screaming to get and swerving.

Erratically, and when the bodies hit.

The floor, let them, Let the bodies out of the floor, Just let them. It's that. That's the what's the highlight of this podcast?

Oh, don't pick it already?

Yeah, I'm sorry. It's all downhill from here down with the sickness. Oh ship, We're gonna have to pay a lot of royalties to go to a lot of bands at OZ.

Fast Now is disturbed? D I s t R.

It is misspelled in an interesting way. Disturb apostrophe D.

I doubt disturbed, disturbed I hope?

So I bet we could just get in weasel in here.

Okay, here we go, Here we go.

I'm very excited to have Michelle in the car. We have a lot to catch up on. She's living in Philadelphia, l City of brotherly love and a cracked bell. They wrote the declar of Independence there at least signed it, as well as the Constitution. A lot of people don't realize both of those happened in Philadelphia.

I didn't know that at all.

Well, I might be telling tales that are not learned in school.

Are you doing tales outside the airport.

No, No, I'm pretty sure both were signed in Philly because we went to look at that bell, which, to be perfectly honest, it's just a fucking bell.

You can't say that.

You know what. Hey, sorry if I'm spitting in your face, America. But it's just a cracked bell Philly.

Oh dang, But.

Michelle bloone is no cracked bell, and she's about to get in the car for do you need a ride?

She's no crackedbell?

Is your Do you have a family member riding a bike around town? Missus Steth wish.

I wasn't looking to the left at all. I was.

I'm pointing at her, searching, searching there she is. Yeah, I'm all.

She's so excited to not have to sit there any longer.

She made, she made a very excited face. Oh oh she is. Maybe I need to help her. She's got a big suitcase, she got.

Hill. Yeah, we'll be right out.

We're all plugged up, I mean stuffed up, I mean plugged in. Got I Hi, Hi, Michelle. Sorry I couldn't help you with your bag. I have where we're all wired in and your microphone is there. You'll notice there are seatbelt holes. So that is a custom cover.

Oh, we're doing it already, It's already happening. Oh my god. Yeah, Okay, I'm gonna set the mic down so I can properly do my seatbelt.

Okay.

Michelle Balloon in the car, in.

The car with us in Los Angeles.

Fresh, I imagine Philly, unless she was somewhere other than home, and I imagine Philadelphia.

How was it cold?

No, it was. Actually the weather's been very nice in Philly, which I like it. When I'm going somewhere that has nice weather. I like it where the place that I'm from has bad weather. So I'm kind of disappointed that their weather's going to be nice.

Wait, you like it.

I want it to be cold there. I want to be cold and windy and rainy and awful.

Oh but it's nice.

It's nice right now.

Oh well, that's okay. If both places are nice, that just means you made two good decisions in your life.

Did you just want to feel that difference of like that you have traveled all the way across the whole country.

I just want to feel that like I've I'm somewhere else and I'm doing better than the people that I left in the other city.

Oh okay, it's a competition thing with your immediate fans.

Yeah, that makes sense.

So you want your baby girl to be cold right now?

You know, she runs kind of warm, so I feel that she's more more prepared equipped to deal with it. And she's got she just got I just got a really nice raincoat. He's very excited to you, So I think that she she'd be fine with it.

So, yeah, it's out of her best interest because she runs hot, so it should be colder there exactly.

Yeah.

How old is she?

She's two and a half.

It's pretty cute kid, because she's.

She's an adorable child.

She's a very pretty child.

She's very pretty. She's like she's I mean, she's she's blonde hair and blue eyes. She's not that classic you know, knee jerk your kids is very cute kind of Yeah.

Yeah, that awful, classic knee jerk Hitler reaction.

I used to say. I used to feel like like it was almost like I was embarrassed that my child was so aryan baby. It was just like, oh, I just felt like it was just you know, the Ariyan nation coming up to me, you know, and telling me how pretty my.

Kid, Thank you for making another one.

Yeah, I had a joke about ones, but it never worked. It worked occasionally, but not enough to where I felt it outweigh the fact that I sounded really racist when I also had this joke that that I stopped doing for the same reason, where like this uh Latina cashier said how she wanted to have a baby just like mine, and I'm like, uh, are you gonna fuck a ghosts?

Did you do it? Did you do a Latina accent when you did that job?

You know? I I did not. I shouldn't know. You shouldn't or called in somebody to do one for you.

Yeah, you should. That's what I do when it when there's accents in my act, I coin at someone in the audience. You Mexican, you'll have this accent. I'm not racist, so I'm not gonna do the accent.

Would you say these words and hand Rich Gabe style? Hand them an index card?

But I'm Panamanian. It's okay. You'll still be able to do it. You like them, And that's just so I'm not racist. Rich Gabe. What happened on Rich Gabe?

Oh, I don't know. He lives in Portland, and married.

Yeah we have. It's one of these comics.

He did like two bits that were very very.

Great and they were a total like it was an entire act these bits. It like took exactly five.

Minutes to do, and everybody loved him and he won the Funniest Person and off I dated him for a time.

We forgot about that slap the skin, but yeah, it's like one happen.

He was very funny travel thing.

Yeah, he was great.

Just lazy, I mean just lazy. No, you just didn't want.

To have to a lot of people just stopped doing it.

No he did.

He just did not want to. I have to do more stuff and and be somewhere. No, that's not good.

He's hard.

The podcast and so rich Rich Rich.

I just said you were very funny.

He felt were having a private conversation and.

We only meant lazy when you were working working at the bookshelf store.

Oh yeah, I forgot about that was when I dated it. But yeah, and I love his wife Susan now like we do the rest of the podcast.

Dedicate it to him.

I forget that. I forget that when I'm in public, that there's other people that live around me that might know the people I'm talking about when I'm on a microphone.

You know, when you were talking about sir, I was gonna say, for that guy, what's his name again?

Rich Gabe? Rich Gabe, very funny, very nice person.

But also I completely relate to that. When I started stand up, it was like what I wanted to do all my life. And then once I started, I was like, this fucking sucks. It's like constant work, constant and constant work.

I want to quit all the time.

It's all not that much payoff.

I get like, if you get to make oh, this is gonna be great that I'm gonna do. But then it's like I actually have to do it, like I wish there was, Like I always wish there's like a just a comedy robot version of me I could send. You actually have to do it. Oh, I have to be the one to do that thing that's a lot of pressure.

And stand there when they don't like it. That's been happening. I've been doing music with Brendon Davis.

Yes, which I've seen you do music and I love it very much.

Thank you, Michelle. I love you. I've already told you though.

You tell people that one time a year, and it's usually during.

Christmas, and it's and I make it worthy because I just really overdo it to the point where they get uncomfortable.

And that makes up for the rest of the year where I'm just kind of cold.

Right now, you're still building me up.

Yeah, that's right.

We're still on the upswing there, ready for it to fall down. But uh oh we we for two nights in a row.

He agreed to shows in a row to do shows at this place called the Clubhouse, which is like almost like.

A generic version of UCB.

It's like someone bought a storefront and there's like four different rooms and they have improv classes during the day and then they have all kinds of different comedy shows at night.

There.

I like that place. Yeah, it's and it's it's somewhere in La kind of by.

It's off Vermont, you know where the John's on Vermont is by fat It's in that strip.

So it's like a weird storefront.

You would kind of never could I was looking for it and I had mapped to it, wast to it, whatever, and I was standing there and I couldn't see the sign. Yes, someone had to come out of the door, which was right in front of me, but the sign had this creaky like crooked ass like the clubhouse no girls allowed sky but it was yeah, it's very nice, Okay, continuell.

My only point was just for so two nights in a row, we had to do shows there, and so it's not it's not a place where I would see necessarily see like my peers or people that I know. It's a lot of people who are new to comedy or just trying stuff out. And I realized I was like sitting in the back, like I'm the hugest diva in the world because I never want to do shows like this or rooms where I don't automatically have like the earned goodwill.

Of just you know what I mean, Like people know are like, oh, I all Karen's coming.

Up, yeah right, Instead like in that place, I was just one of the two of us, were just another act on the show where everyone kind of brought their own friends or it was a lot of improf people like and I was just sitting back there getting all like super uncomfortable.

And it was like, Oh, that's because you.

Expect, right like to basically to be lauded everywhere you go, and you haven't even done anything yet.

Just just earn it just in case you feel uncomfortable feeling that way. That's exactly how I felt too. I'm like, I really was like, oh shit, no one here knows me, and they're aren't. They're here to see sketch and stuff and I and they weren't. Once I started talking, They're like, there's this guy, and I'm like, what, I have to prove myself.

Yeah, I've been doing.

This in this town for many years.

Yeah, that'sinitely because I do stand up in New York now a lot, like usually like every few weeks, and there's so many comics I don't know. So I get on these shows by virtue of you know, people I know from here, and then you know pretty much the whole lineup, unless people are coming in from LA. You know, I don't know it. So it's like, Okay, well, I guess I have to do something where they think I'm funny. I guess that guys, I wouldn't care, but right now

Yeah, it's it's so funny, and it's like, uh, what isn't that the reason that I'm there in the first play.

Oh yeah, yeah, but.

It actually isn't. It's like I think I'm there to get my hair brushed by you know, a door quote unquote adoring fans. Right, It's like, what are you talking about? It's supposed to be a comedian.

For me, it has to be one or the other. I because I really really enjoy it when I'm in a place like I was just in boise Ido, no one really knows me except for the staff there. And then it's that's very freeing and I can be uh, you know, do old jokes or ah, yeah, like I used to in a way that I don't do anymore around here, or I don't know. It's kind of ringing, like we're.

Out of la or New York and you're just like, oh, people aren't going to be like what kind of premises are they doing?

Yeah yeah, yeah, I got a lot of experts like armchairs.

Yeah yeah.

So it's freeing to have support, and it's also freeing to have absolutely no one know who you are. But it's that mixed situation. But like a bunch of audience people that don't know you, And then my Dad's sitting in the middle. That's what That's a nightmare to me.

Like Philly has been nice for like you did stand up there when we were you know, you did the like that one bar show we went to. You also to stand the club, Like yeah, it's it was like, it's so great to like you after being in LA for ten years to move to Philly. I mean it's not the best, but it's so it's great for a

How do you get to New York from Philly?

I did the train, Oh.

The train public transits something that exists in every American city. Ohcept Los Angeles.

Yeah, no, it's awesome. Yeah, an hour and twenty minutes.

That's great.

Oh that's nice.

Yeah. And I just was in DC on Friday and and I took the train there and that was I took the Acela because I wasn't paying for it and which is the fast train, And that was only an hour and a half. Wow, to get to d C.

That's great. It's so cool that you're like in the.

Midle there's so many things.

Yeah, all those cities are so close to each other. And when I when you compare it to just the state of California, Montana, where I'm from, it's like, oh, I want to go see my uncle. That's a three day drive. Like we're old Wild West people. I don't know.

Did you was how close is Boise from from Missoula?

Oh? Nine hours?

Oh okay, so your dad did not make the trip?

No, no, But I have cousins there and they they it was interesting too to hook up with them again because they both spent quite a bit of time in prison and hard times when we were younger, uh, in foster homes and stuff. But they were great, and I was talking to them, and even though I could tell there's been this rough life that they've led, they really were kind of like me. Like the the way my cousin was talking, I was like, oh man, you are related to me. Yeah, So then I feel like I

Yeah, oh yeah, and you got that tear drop?

Yeah. Yeah, there is the fact that I got this tear drop.

You're going to be in get hard to Oh my.

God, I I get angry when I see that billboard? Does anyone else get angry about it? Existing? Kevin Hart can just go straight to hack as far as I'm concerned.

Are you said? What that same hack? Kind of your tear drop test?

You know what? This is fun?

We'll give you you kiss and excuse me.

But I've I have some cousins that are in gangs. It's it's that's do It's this damn figgly foo that he's been up to. That's that's chit canery. And I'm.

Get I don't like this. I don't like to swear around Tenny and so, but it's really hard for me not to be in the car not say motherfucker. So I I I say buster now instead, it will just really no, I just say buster. Look at that buster, Look at that Buster.

Oh that's great, that Buster.

And it's satisfying. It's satisfying in a way that I needed to be because motherfucker.

So and my sister was saying motherfucker in front of her kids the whole time, and they just knew that they couldn't. And when she said it, she got a fuck her and they go up, you owe us. She had to put money in a jar or something, and they get the money. So if my sister continues to swear, and they never do swear, they make money. She she made a little business out of her. Yeah, yeah, for the kids. But Tenny is Tenny is.

My mom never swore around me, so I just it's weird. I've always felt like uncomfortable about swearing around kids.

My parents always swore around me. And then when I would swear, my dad be like what it? Oh my god, I've heard you say.

Yeah. See that's why, like I would feel like it's permissive, even if you're saying it's not.

I'm afraid that friends used to come to my house and as entertainment. Watch me swear around.

My mom because she didn't care, like she doesn't know.

I mean, well, I was angry at her. Oh I see I didn't care. Ah yeah, sorry, sorry forty year old mom. Sorry I said things.

That's that's what you were supposed to do as a teen.

Yeah, I was angry. Man.

That was the setup you were.

You had it all like you were like an eighties movie wrapped up, you know, angry teen skateboarding away.

Yeah, I was that way crazy.

Want to hair?

Oh we don't.

Oh no, no, I just didn't know.

Oh, we're going to a hotel in Fairfax and Melrose.

Okay, maybe we'll just go down.

It's just am I being kidnapped?

That yeah?

Sorry, And I mean you do love me.

I love you so much. When I'm taking you to my house and I'm gonna hobble you.

Oh, and I'm gonna hobble you. She's gonna hobble your peach. Everyone here knows I'm talking about turning you to shoes. Yeah, we're gonna yeah, sorry, we put a bag on your head, but we will be dropping you off. We're kidnapping you, but we are taking you to the hotel. You will. So it's actually pretty low stakes.

It's a service of the hotel.

Yes.

Oh it's a small world. Yeah, I mean it really is.

It's just a virtual experience that they've been trying at that hotel Oculus Rift.

Yah.

Yeah.

The satellite plan.

Yes, they're like, do you want to violently experience our kidnap plan?

You checked that it was defaulted.

Yeah.

The website website. I don't want to be opted in right away websites. I think that's against the ftc uham Loss or the FDA.

I'm not either way. It's not approved.

Look, it's the policy of the days in so that's yeah.

You're supposed to be like, oh, I won't say the name, but it's something like blaze Blind.

Oh yeah, it's the hotel low Hotel Blicks. Yeah, not that they blow sponsor if do you need to ride? No tel sex thank you?

Do you guys have sponsors?

Nos?

Yeah I do. Oh oh my god, I forgot about this thing that I get to do that you just reminded. My mom said for because they have these uncomfortable bowling shirts. Uh huh okay, and I can't remember who's who's sponsoring them. Her bowling team City, Yeah, in Sun City, Arizona. And I said how much would nice bowling shirts cost? And she's like, I don't know, like you know, twenty five thirty dollars each. I'm like, if I buy you guys bowling shirts, can I sponsor your team? She goes yes,

Yes?

Can I put a big picture of myself?

No? Sure?

How about I do some designs? And she's totally gonna let me sponsor her team. She says there has to be an animal in it. I thought i'd remember when we went and go saw those tigers. Chris, I have this Polari picture holding a baby tiger. It's a terrible picture of me, but I am holding a baby tiger and that would be great to put on a bowling jersey.

It would be hard to but you have to heat transfer a photo of it.

Or oh sounds like you know how to do it.

I do. I do, and it's not gonna look good. You want their shirts.

To look good, I'm gonna have to have.

You're gonna want to maybe some original artwork, some vectorized line art.

Oh yeah, you know. Chris worked at a T shirt place in Austin, Texas, met him.

What was it called text screen?

Yeah, it was right by that tie place, wasn't it ice.

Yeah. I lived above the type place. Oh yeah, the noodle house. And then at the end of the week, I would go down to Night's that do you have any leftover food? And she would give me.

I didn't know that. That's funny.

I was poor.

We would have food in our house, like we we We'd be like, I don't really want to eat this, Well, maybe Chris will come over.

And eat it.

I literally I would drive across county people, I would.

I would just have things. And one time you ate my roommates left over, I'm gonna no one knows that this person is Tiffany. Remember she had like eat the opium food and you ate the leftovers and then she got really mad at you.

Yeah. Yeah, and I'm okay with I'm okay with that.

She's kind of a dour person.

Yeah, and a huge listener of this show.

Yeah, I know, I feel apology Republican.

Leftovers.

Yeah, I would eat him again. I would eat him again, and I would still knock knock over Jason's badger dancing Badgers. It was like I'd spit on a family member. He had this college mascot that would dance the Wisconsin who were just they would just play duke, and I wondered if it would break up their marriage.

It did not know.

They're still They're still living there, living hard, living hard with like Kevin Hart hard livers.

But anyhow, enough about people we don't really care about.

I did work. I work shirt yeah, t shirt shopping.

Chris and I have known each other for quite a long time. We started doing stand up together in two thousand and two thousand is when I started. But you started a few months before.

My back up my story that I told before she got in the cover. Let's see, Okay, okay, so tell us more about this first time you did comedy.

Oh, the first time I did stand Okay, the first time I did stand up. John Raven was the open my coat.

She's backing up.

But I know what you're talking about. You were this now here. I know what he's talking about. The second time I did stand up, Okay. Chris Fairbanks was the host. Okay, he had a mustache, he had handcuffs, and he called himself the Comedy Cup and I thought he was like twenty years older than I was. It was and I thought I was like thought he was. I mean, I just I was like, didn't call myself, you call the comedy car And who is this guy? I did that night?

I was doing a character.

I didn't know anything about comedy started.

I'm scared to start doing stand up?

What did you? Sorry? Can I just ask what would the comedy cops say? When he got on stage?

Yeah?

Don't remember I pulled over a woman named Miranda the other day. I didn't have no alright, already what.

You slid right into that like you've been waiting to say it for twenty years.

I don't know. I think that's how I said it was so I remember it being very popular at the time.

You were a cop that was doing comedy.

I didn't know what else to do.

Okay, how long and when did you start? So I started in February two thousand. You started just before that, right?

Yeah? Yeah, yeah, so I was I had reached the ranks of hosting the open mic.

Yeah, I'll be a room open mic.

That's where we started.

That is the valve, Karen, you shouldn't. And our friend Mary Mario to Giorgio, is doing a great, great job with it.

A lot of people call Mario, but his name's Mary.

It is the people. Do you call Mario?

Yeah, it's spelled.

I fucking hate that place. That Mormon they're building one of these big Mormon castles. Is anybody Mormon in here and they're building on it. I'm so mad because Philadelphia so historic with such beautiful old buildings, and I love it so much, and then they're building this fake, like like luxurious castle where people are gonna go by and be like, oh look, let's take a picture in front of this famous building, like fuck you, it's it's wait.

Mormons are like opening up places in Philadelphia.

Yeah, the huge like that. It looks like that, and it's right in the middle of town.

Organized religion can be so creepy sometimes.

No, And I brought my old my older sister was visiting me here and we drove past that and night it gets all lit up and and she's like, oh, she's I've seen that before. I'm like, no, you haven't. No, I swear, And though you want to think that you've seen it before. You've never seen it before. I said, it's just faice to look like it's some sort of auspicious. Is that the word I'm thinking of, right, auspicious, important, ostentatious, ostentatious,

You know, So they basically made themselves look like they were also a historic thing that you should visit in Philadelphia.

That's my opinion of it, because I feel like that's how it comes off, you know, And I just I find it.

Just well, these are strong words coming from a woman who's currently sitting on a sheet with holes in to use the No, it's our old joke. We don't know the difference between Judaism and but like we said, we don't like it organized.

Why?

I like, why do you have you have dogs?

Yes? Okay, can't you see all of the hair everywhere?

I want to start the world whir first? Unorganized religion?

Okay, just when.

Where's the phone number to the pastor again like that kind of like we really just don't know what we're doing.

Every it's always a half number la.

I don't like about organized religion is because everything is in order and everything.

Why does it have to be Sundays all the time?

Yeah?

Yeah, I want mine to be.

Can we read a different book again?

Yeah?

Mind?

The gods are gonna flip flop opinions will change from one week to the next, and we don't have anyone's phone number. Do you guys like my unorganized religion?

I like it better than the comedy CoP's.

He was great. The comedy Cop brought people joy.

Yeah, but he killed a lot of people too.

Yeah, that's the dark side of the common.

You guys, look right now, they're tearing that building apart.

I had a cardiac arrest Beverly Hill.

They're they're drilling into the just.

Now getting started.

Are they? Are they getting out with clues for Whitney Houston's mysterious death?

Is that where she went down?

That's where she.

Died, right there on that ledge. We got a got a hammer. Oh, here's a drop of Bobby brown'siz. That's what they're saying. I knew he did it. I knew he did. That is interesting. I love you know, when it comes down to it, we're all just fucking seven year old boys are excited about.

I love seeing cement mixers. I'm gonna just throw that out there. What I like cement mixers? Oh okay, I don't know. I like eddie mixers. Apparently it is fun to walk.

It's so funny you can really hear it.

Yeah yeah, Oh wow, they're really getting after it. And look at that guy spraying. He sprang it with water at talube. The the puncher, Oh looks sparks.

I hope that was really high tech. It doesn't look like you're your grandpa's whole whole puncher. No, no, they're moving.

This is your grandson's whole puncher. I mean I hope they marked lines in the power line, you know. I hope that's That's one thing that Beverly Hills Hotel doesn't need. It is a needless outage. Look, they started, they're a little bit.

Are they Is this place being demolished?

Are you about to are if they have the right to be doing that?

Do you kind if I find it's such a historic building?

Yeah? Are those what if we're just watching really rich vandals. Ye, like we bought this equipment.

We bought this huge weird poker. It seems to be able to knock anything down.

The big weird with the I like to call it a puncher. Maybe loop the puncher you guys love then.

Maybe the installation art like eye way ways. It's like signifying.

Right, I was gonna say, what they're doing is just the new graffiti.

That's right, bear it all down?

Yeah, that's what that means. It really stands for a lot of bigger things. Yeah, that I can't think of.

Yeah, well, the Berlin Mall comes to mind. Nineteen eighty nine.

It was it eighty nine.

Yeah, that one time.

Time, remember and David Hasselhoff came out in a suit made of lights and performed what looked on a feeling yes on the walk it up on the Berlin guys. These girls are teaming up on me and I'm.

Just asking a question that wasn't really you think.

That clip would play over and over and over until the end of time.

He had a suit that lit up like urban cowboys, and it was lit up. It was like a mariachi person souper.

But my memory of the comedy cop maybe exaggerated.

As as there. I wasn't called the comedy cop. I was just like, Hey, I'm a detective so and so from the third precinct. I've been wanting to try some jokes. It wasn't like, Hey, I'm Chris the comedy cop. Let's see what I got in this bag here? Oh, this is called Michael Jackson's bicycle.

That would be the comedy mail man.

Yeah, I guess so, oh who addressing Michael Jackson's next letter is to Rush Limbaugh. I wonder what he has to say. Then I'd go into an impression. I actually like this act that we're writer.

I think you should read premiere it at your one hour special at Meltown's.

I would love to, but I don't have a mustache.

Michelle. If you have a show to night, are you gonna go to Chris's show?

I did I text you Chris saying I was sorry I'm not going, or emailed in some form of communication, or maybe I thought it really loud.

Had I accepted it?

But I don't.

I don't know.

Maybe maybe you're not speaking to me, but no, but no, I have a I have a show tonight, and is your down to tomorrow, Yes, tomorrow show.

The head is in the clouds right now. Yeah, show tomorrow.

I'm going did I say tonight? Yeah?

Yeah, And now everyone's gonna go, oh, guys, don't listen to me, I'm.

Doing the business tomorrow night. And when I told Jim Hamilton that I was doing the business, he goes trader, Oh, it's a little joy and he thinks he owns all comedy a little doy. Yes, I said it, Jim, even though I know you don't listen to podcasts.

Oh, that's hilarious. Even though that during his show, one of the girls that runs the business feeds some free drinks all night. He's gotta be like, oh, we're letting you have it.

Yeah, I own comedy.

Yeah we what do we call him? He was a rape comic?

Oh go because he his and it's better now.

But he's a great comic.

He's a great I'm not saying he's better now. I'm saying the content is better, right right right to rapy humor he used to do. I am got my extra.

Extra long fingers, so they know I'll do it joke, Hamilton's old joke that I still really love. It's like I'll do they say in the.

Bedroom, that's how I used to talk on stage. He doesn't do it.

Your physical attributes and I have really long fingers. So the next time we were in bed, I fucking choked.

Her a ram.

It was I did it wrong. I think everyone's like bracing themselves. It's like, oh no, he's gonna do a fingering joke.

Got it is a mislead into a rape show.

Is just because he's you're right.

It was just a choke. You're right. He could be doing any anything.

With the She could be saying, I like it when men choke me. We're living in that era now.

He could be leaning off the bed and to it and just gently choking.

Maybe she was giving the international sign of please choke me.

Maybe there's a lot of bitches that want it.

Fortunately, we don't know how she was dressed exactly.

She might have been wearing choke me shorts. What okay?

What?

So many emergencies today.

Oh they're going to like next, we're gonna drive another black and there's gonna be a fruit cart in away.

We're not have to run rights, I'm gonna have to dive onto an awning.

Suddenly we're on the Cinamonica Peer. I don't want to drive down here.

I don't want to mess up. The city is set up.

We're in Beverly Hills now, Michelle, do you feel you're finally at home?

I am. I'm getting. It's like I'm reaching. I'm reaching where I feel most comfortable.

Oh. I remember that city hall as being the police in Beverly Hills. Cop.

I wonder if there are any comedy cops inside of.

This comedy cop would notice it's a weird comedy.

Before I even said Beverly Hills Cop, you had started your sentence. I know you were wondering if anything was in there, and you changed it.

No, that's not true. I was going to say comedy cop, no matter what, no matter what you said.

So you said on Twitter that this was coming out today. Do you really put out your podcast the same day.

In emergency situations? Yes, it was. We are usually our episodes come out Monday morning. First thing.

Huh. Oh that's we should have this conversation a few a minute ago, because then he could have said emergency and then a fire truck.

All right, great, and I could have done my five alarm chili joke again. You missed that.

Comedy chili chef?

Do you still make chili shell?

I never made chili.

Yeah, you used to make a mean chili.

Are you?

Yeah, you made chili ones.

I made spaghetti.

Ah, spaghetti same death.

Yeah.

Well you were supposed to ask me if I'm still calling spaghetti chili?

Are you still calling spaghetti chili?

Yeah? I always have, always will.

Okay, happening? Is this back to your improproots? Am I dropping the ball here?

No? If you're just no ending me.

I know, no, I'm done.

Oh we're going. When I first moved to Los Angeles, I lived here in West Hollywood and it's where a lot of gay men live and women, I think probably, but mostly men. And I would go to the gymnasium here at twenty four hour fitness and I'd go up there and it was like nineteen ninety nine, so back then it was a different time, and maybe I was a little nervous.

It wasn't ninety nine, it was two thousand, like three or four.

Yeah, this was around three or oh, and I uh, And I would go there and I'm kind of getting there. I'm like, oh, man, what if what if? You know one of these guys is gonna snap me in the butt with a towel or something, right, and they fucking all ignored me like it was an ugly troll. Yeah, I would like.

Because I think you might be. Oh, I'm sorry to.

Tell you there was two thousand and three, Karen. I was looking pretty fucking good.

I'm saying, of course you were looking good. But these men are there.

They were all huge. Yeah, they were all physical specimens, and I was that quality.

Twenty four hour fitness and the crunch I think on sunset are both. I was, you can't, you can't. You can't bring your stuff up in there expect to.

Get They were not wanting any of my stuff. No, no, I was really it really did hurt my feelings. I was like, God, no one will give me the time of day. Here.

Is that when you grew out your mustache?

No, it's when I grew out of Yes, no, I didn't have I.

Didn't started wearing those really smalldn I'm sure.

Yes, it's when I just just spid the I started having love making with men. Now do you guys like me?

Yeah, look at me a second, this dick.

See I could be like you guys, see.

Mich where did you live when you lived.

Here, I when I when I first moved here, I lived with Maria Bamford and lose feelss because I was house sitting for her while she was at the Melbourne Comedy Festival. And then I stayed living with her until Yeah, yeah, you came over a bunch of times, I think, Chris, and then and then I got my own place on uh Orange on Sycamore and Franklin close right by there's like a crack park right there's right across the street

Oh drank herself to do Right now, they're punching holes in the side of that holding to prove it. Oh, that was a different exhausted callback.

I can't it was a crawlback.

That's great. Thanks callback.

It's Chris. You can use that the next time.

He'ssen tonight at You're One Hour Special at Miltown time.

Yeah, I'm tomorrow tomorrow. I can make it now that I think about it.

Tomorrow everyone's going to go to the wrong comedy concert.

But what if people listen to this in the morning tomorrow? You need to establish that. Tomorrow is April.

Fourteenth, at nine pm. I'm doing a comedy show at the nerd Mouth Theater. It's an evening with Chris Fairbanks.

And I'm actually across the street at toy I'm doing an hour an hour comedy.

You're doing You're doing an hour. It gets hour over a plate of pad tie.

You're just cheats very.

Slowly, going to be there for an hour.

She's gonna be muttering to herself for an hour while she eats dinner.

If anyone wants to come, how things have changed vangelism my life.

I remember when these noodles weren't so sh Oh, there's that twenty four hour fitness there. It is nothing, nothing changes. How guys, you won't even look at me.

Everyone was turned away.

And that was a little bit of a hike from your place too. I ran, oh, look at you.

I would run from.

And they didn't even that, and I Chris.

When I got here, I was like, oh, oh, somebody's got to get into shape, and I would run. I mean that lasted for not very long, but.

Yeah, well, could you didn't keep going back to the well when it was dry?

Yes, very healthy. The exercise well yeah, the gay sex.

Well that wasn't paying off for you.

No, the bucket, here's the bucket. No dicks, dick.

One more time.

But it's a weird way to find out you're not gay is that they won't accept you. That's how I knew the bricks mug. Okay, okay, I guess I'll just stay with my girlfriend at the time, hangs out. Do you still hang out with that?

Yes?

We talk.

We talked because you know, I hope we have kids of similar age. Oh really, yeah, they had and we we we we had we had a at their house. Three she just had a third kid. They're all all their names start with h A, which is which is? And their last name starts with h A. So oh wow, And I think maybe I'll have to stop now because they're running out of names that aren't you know, and then you can't have the fourth one I can't think of, Well, I'm Marriott. The first one was was, uh why I

Oh wow, Okay, that seems you know, when you're young and people have kids and even though they aren't twins, they have a name thing, and they all wear matching like ships like rugby shirts, but they aren't twins.

Yeah, I don't know. That's hard to keep up. I couldn't keep it up, you know what I mean. And I'm only having one kid, so I could pretend I'm I'm going to name all of my children.

They're going to be any I want. I'm a big fan of if your kids says, hey, I want to dress like Superman all week and start calling me Scott. You just do that?

No? Yeah? Why not?

Yeah? My I told my parents I want to be Scott and they called me Scott for months and months.

That is awesome.

And I and then.

I named dys morphia. Yeah, I was very serious, you know what.

I don't want to They got better. Wait. I just wanted to be Scott because some kid at my daycare he had like these blue and yellow Adidas shoes and I his name was Scott, and I was like, I want to be Scott. I like the name Scott to this day. I kind of like Scott. So my dad's like, all right, call you Scott. And then after a while I really got sick of it, and I wanted to be Chris again.

I don't know what.

They kept calling me Scott and.

Then they started hitting you in the face.

Yeah, a lot of choking. Yeah, dad had long fingers.

He used to do. Yeah, he used to really do like a character on Yeah.

Yeah, our friend and so we called.

Him he's very funny, very and I'm not. Yeah, he's currently funny. Never stopped them stand up, very very funny.

And then one and then once time I think it was didn't Brandan put him up to it? Where were suspenders and he'd like pull on.

Him and he really sounds like yeah yeah, but he.

Was yeah yeah.

Oh has he done? Has Brendan Walshed done the podcast?

Yes, he has been on. He has been on.

He just did it recently.

Yeah. Nice.

Yeah, he was in a great mood.

Good, I'm glad.

What is this place that used to be? Wait a minute, what.

Did that used to be?

The Silver Spoon or that, It doesn't matter, We're just yeah, I like that place.

See you're the one doing it. Oh man, you're the one muttering toy on tie and I'll do your fucking hour.

I remember when this pack tie it wasn't so goddamn salty.

No, that isn't that the Silver Spoon? Connie and Ted's and this you're right, yeah.

Yeah, you're right, Well, okay location, yes.

They also were they were closing the French market.

People like this should be murdered.

Someone that just rolls into the left lane, Like what am I doing over here?

What is Conye and teds? Why does it look like?

That was the Silver Spin they renamed it.

I think it's supposed to be good. I remember Alex and I'm meaning to go there and never having gone there.

I like Silver Spoon. I like things the way they were.

I'm sorry, that's all right, it's all right. We're nearing. We're nearing my hotel. I'm on Melrose in Fairfax. Hello, right on fair Fa my hotel. Actually, if you ever went to the Heart and Hunter, don't the restaurant. It's that is where the hotel is. Although the Heart and Hunter changed chefs, and the chefs from Heart and the Hunter now are at a place on Satel. I can't remember the name. It's some funny name.

Michelle is more of a foodie person. Oh no, she goes like fancy restaurants. I don't ever you know about all the restaurants in town. I never know about any of them.

You know, and then I just yeah, I like going to different restaurants.

Yeah, goddamn, I'm going to have.

My show and Echo Park tonight, and I'm like, where should I go over there?

Oh, like they have that big part of your evening. Yeah, I'm always on the way out, hovered over the sink.

Eating lived here, I would, Yeah, yeah.

It is if you're visiting somewhere, you're right. Yeah, when I was in Philly, I was like, where should I eat tonight? And exactly, of course, I forget what it's like to be in a in a new town.

It was nice when you came to Philly. It wasn't have my friends in Philly because you know, I didn't really know anybody.

Yeah, yeah, that's that she hasn't Jim.

Jim, I know.

Yeah.

Cost of living in Philly much low, way lower. Yeah. For we have like just a row house condo that's like three bedrooms, two and a half bath, finished basement one for less than we were paid. You know how much it is. Yeah, it's twenty two I can actually be twenty one fifty.

It got some break Yeah you're kidding.

No, I'm not kidding. And it's right in the city.

It's like you lived in Feelings beautiful.

It's like it's that it's a great walkable neighborhood. It's amazing. I'm going right, oh on fair facts, I mean a mel Rose. Yes, you're going right. Although I think you can, I can't remember. It might actually be.

One thing I noticed about Philly is the people that live there do not like my voice or the things I said.

I was just not I think you need to go back and try to time.

Oh I'm afraid. Uh yeah, I have my opinions about it, but you you.

But you know what, though I haven't headlined there, you know what I mean, it may be you know.

So yeah, I guess that makes a difference.

You know, Yeah, it does make a difference. Yeah. So I can't really I can't. I don't think you should. Yeah, it's this. It's this like ground building. If you take a left on this street on Hayworth, it's that building on the corner. There is a really nice place.

It looks like a hostel or used to be.

At That's why in all the rooms kind of look like regular bedrooms. Wow, it's really cool and it's not it's kind of I mean, it's not like cheap, but I mean it's not it's reasonable compared to other places that aren't es Central.

And yeah, it's right.

Here because I don't runt a car here anymore because I just use Uber, you know, and walk.

It's changed the game that Uber.

Oh yes, big time, big time. So what happens now? Is there like some sort of ritual.

You get the song? Yes, we have a bit of a ritual. I mean you can predict what it might be, but we I love that you knew that there would be one.

Oh my god.

Okay, so but wait, before we started, you have to tell us if like, what your shows are this week, if people want to go.

Oh yeah, yeah. So if it's tonight, I'm doing the Business at nine o'clock and Little Joy Jim Hamilton's comedy Establishment. Tomorrow night, I'm doing put your Hands Together, you see, be on Franklin. I have to establish what you see beer talking about? You see to be Franklin's at eight, Yes, and then I'm going to be jetting on over to to sleep away camp at the Downtown Independence.

That's a fun thing.

Oh is it? Okay? Good?

Because and then those boys are very nice?

Oh good, I'm like, yeah, there's so many new shows it's crazy, and I was just like, what else can I do? And then Wednesday and how many plans I was gonna hang out? And Thursday I'm doing Big Money, which I always do what I'm in town. I love it. And then I'm doing Little Joy at Jim Hamilton's Comedy Establishment, booked by Jim Hamilton.

Yeah, those are all the funest shows. You're gonna have a great time.

Yeah, I'm super excited.

That'll be great.

And I wish I could go to your hour tomorrow night. I cannot.

It's quite all right, And Karen, I like a room full strength.

Sorry, we can't see each other every night, Michelle.

What you don't know is I'm going to see you. This is where I reveal and it gets super weird.

Hi, I get to see you again.

I told you i'd be here.

It weird.

I'll just we'll talk after you. We'll talk after I.

Honestly feel like that is the one thing like when people show up to see me, like at first you're like, oh, neat, yeah, and then it turns into this awful like because it's like, oh, well, if you don't do well, that's one thing. Yeah, or if you do or blah blah blah, No, it's gonna talk to them after whatever. It always makes me want to run.

It's hard, like I have to like sort of like it's like you have to force it. This thing you have to put on, this sort of like conversational thing. I have to do that a lot in Philly and a lot when I'm in other cities, you know, Like I was in Minnesota doing a lot of stand up and it's just it's exhausting.

Yeah, and it's different than it just being a fan of com I like when a fan comes and they're like, can I talk to you after? Sure? But even that's a cousin, my cousins. Yeah, I got so nervous because I haven't seen these kids. I mean one of them I hadn't seen since he was fourteen. Wow. I was so nervous. But then once you're on stage, it all makes sense.

No.

And I I did stand up in Minnesota, and I headlined this small which is really fun and I made a ton of money actually, and uh, in Minneapolis, the Comedy Corner Underground is great club. But every so that is basically where all my family lives. I went to high school about in Wisconsin, about an hour and a half away. I had aunts, uncles, cousins, my sisters, my nephew, my people I went to high school with, people I went to college with. They were sold out shows, so

You don't understand that is what they do.

You don't get how this works. And it and it it went pretty well. I mean I I did well, but people did interact at certain points, but I handled it.

Yeah, it's and then you have to go those are my friends that are heckling me right now. These are the people that didn't pay to get in. And then they're like, hey, he's talking about us. We're helping him. I could not be smart.

Aren't they usually drunk? Oh yeah, like a party night. And then it's like yeah, you're basically their dancing monkey.

No, and it's just like, oh, I'm going to heckle you. Do you have no idy? When you say that, it's like you're you're telling me like you're fucking ugly. Like I don't want to hear. I don't want to have to explain comedy to you right now.

You know I'm gonna heckle you. Oh I'm so mad at your family.

Oh my god.

But they were very good. They're well behaved, and.

I'm not mad at them.

Yes, they were good. They're like fifteen minutes of my set. My set right now is making fun of my twin sister and the fact that she is such a good sport during it makes her pretty terrific.

Oh that's great.

Yeah, Sarah, she's good. She's good. She's visiting me at Philly at the end of this month.

Well, we're at your pretentious fucking hipster Yeah that I thought you weren't going to reveal that time. Why don't you go in and tell the guy you like his stalin haircut?

Yeah?

Take that. Yeah, I'd like to end it with some jabs. But it's good to have you. Thank you for finally being on our phae.

Yes, thank you.

I'm happy to have done it. And hey, look I got a ride from That's the great part, the fact that you're doing this your heroes.

Thank you. We feel pretty hard.

What do I do? Throw the mic at one of you?

That's usually how we end it. We just like to have you in anger throw the mic but before.

You do, we're going to do our signal.

Yeah.

Well, thank you Michelle for being on Do you Need a Ride You've been listening to Do you Need a Ride? D y n a r