Ep. 103 - Karen and Chris pick up MATT INGEBRETSON

I leave, then I you wanna way back home?

Either way, we want to be there, doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us time and they turnino and gage.

We want to send you off inside. We wanna welcome you back home.

Tell us all about every scared or was it fine?

Now?

Porn? Do you need to ride? Do your need ride? Do you need to ride? Do your need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

Ride with Karen and Chris?

Okay, I'm turning these off.

Welcome, do you need a ride? Oh my god, this is Chris Fairbanks. This is care and we are We're in beautiful Burbank.

Heillo, Hello, Hello, and we.

Almost left my car. We're in your car right now, that's right. We almost left my car running.

Just running on the street.

Yeah, just run. I was. My plan was to move it in your driveway because I never noticed in all these years that if I leave my car passed eight. Wow, how much is the ticket I could have been getting?

I'm sure it was above eighty dollars the way they do it in my town.

And if I have ever ed her ever ever, if I had ever ever ed her, oh god, I always like to start our episodes with a tiny stroke.

Did you do a ton of coke before this episode?

That just my normal bullet. I don't know what I heard. A bullet is like a thing that shoots the exact nostril serving you twisted. It shoots it, Yeah, and then you can drop it on the ground and no coke spills out. It sounds like a great invention.

Fucking thank god someone from fucking from the band Rush invented that so that we could all have our coke protected.

Yeah.

When you invent something that deals with coke being more easily put into your nostril, who pays you?

Like?

What company?

I guess? No, sorry Colombians Columbia.

You get a government check.

It's a stipend.

Yes, yes, it either goes to that or Parks and ret the TV show. Yes, we're going to bring it back. I am.

I'm going to coke it back.

One time I left my car. I had all these paintings because I would do my painting in college at my dad's because he had that is where I lived one and then two he had a little paint studio because my dad's a painter. Nice, so we did the assignment was like five at least four by four foot paintings, which is, Yeah, that's such a lazy assignment and it's a lot of work, especially if you paint detailed, then you don't do big, broad stroky, bullshit shit hampi art with goddamn dreadlock painted on it.

And then what if you painted with your dreadlock? Do you hate it the same way I would?

I can I can only imagine how angry I would be at that very realistic thing that could have happened. I dipped it. The reason I used my own hair, uh huh is because it's kind of a symbol for how my parents feel about the fact that they're paying for my school and they won't help me maintain my BMW SUV. Sorry, that was a my impression.

Of of someone very specific.

Yes, it's a very specific from Vermont trust fund student in Montana.

When would you call him a Trustafarian? And if so, what song would he sing?

It would sound a little bit like this came for the mountains. I came to telemarkie styy ski Stey.

We've gone and so down that I know exactly when to. It's like volleyball bump set and you come in with your fucking reggae Spike.

I feel like you even knew I could do some mountain riffs.

Of course I did, Chris. I've been sitting next to you listening to you do that riff for quite some time.

I am the Tash of comedy. No, I guess Daniel Toash should be that. I'm the Peter Tosh of reggae comedy.

You're the Josh of comedy. That's where you are? I am. I.

Oh so I left. I went in to have my paintings reviewed. Yes, and it's a three hour process, the length of an art class, twice as long as all the other people give art majors a lot of shit. But you're in school twice as long.

Is that true?

Yeah? And uh the whole time while we're uh, I can't think of the word.

That's anyway my studio.

In studio, judging people's paintings, I can't think of what that word is.

Oh, got it? The County Fair.

I just haven't left the house much.

Okay, we're gonna work through all that.

Yeah, we are, we are. And I came out and my car was moved, the keys were left, the ignition was off. But when I came out. I remembered, oh my god, I left my car open, doors open, hatch open because I just grabbed the paintings ran them up there and they said, are you ready to start? And I'm like, I don't know why not?

And in your mind you were like, my mom just dropped me off. That's what's happening, right.

Why are my mittens not on pieces of yarn from my cuff? And I just remembered, right when I ran out and the car was gone, I'm like, of course it's stolen my Ford Escort wagon. No, it was parked. No one wants that it was perked legally in if I'm not mistaken, they put money in a meter. I don't. I wish they had left a note.

My keys, even the.

Way my keys were left on the seat likes all lined up perfectly fanned out.

Someone you know what I can I tell you my theory.

Yes, please.

A person who has done very bad things in his or her life came upon your running car. It was like, this is my chance to make it and turn it around. Instead of stealing this or being peeing on the front seat like I used to do, what I'm going to do now is be the Christian that I've always wanted to be, and just do the perfect, perfectly nicest.

Thing, right, you think I'd like for it to be that, I'm worried that even more likely is that it's on me in that it was a dreadlocked hippie dude that paint had paint in his dread Yeah, who moved to Montana because he loved it for the mountains, the scenery, and he's probably recycled and did all the things that I never did that I now appreciate.

He recycled his way to Montana and he was.

Like, I'm gonna do the right thing here, bro, and annoyingly in a hippie way, moved my car and parked it like a like a dirty haired sweetheart.

Was there a residual smell of petuli and body odor?

I don't remember. I think it was well aired out, you know, because I left the doors open.

Oh that's right, So he moved it, but he didn't close.

The doors right, right, He left the doors open like it was at a car show for eighty one escort wagons.

Look inside and you'll see Chris's shirt. Well, I was trying to make you feel better, because when you discovered that you had left your car running and the lights on in front of my house. You seem to bit dejected, and so I wanted to comfort you by telling you that when I was home and visiting my family, I went to the CVS. And I love a good CVS trip. I'll look at every goddamn new thing that I can find at the end of the eyle.

I've been to the CVS with you, and yes, you do.

I take a good long time, well just in case there's a new eyeshadow or something. Right, But when I came out about a half an hour later, my lights were on in the car and I was like, oh shit, I left the lights on. That's weird. And then when I got into the car it was on. It was running, and I left the car on.

Also, because your car when it's running, it's just a silent electronic PERR.

It is whisper quiet, yes, just like my washing machine.

So someone would have to get in to steal a purse or some CVS mask ere to then realize the car was on and.

Driveable, yes, And that's also when they would realize the car is alive, and then claws would come out and kill them for getting into it because this car is a lot like Christine.

Oh wow, you give a car? How did you have to pay extra for that? No?

I just called up the devil, he loud devil.

I like, I just watched Is it Brian de Palma that made Christine?

I don't know.

I believe so, okay I could. I know it's based on a Stephen King book.

That's what I was gonna say. But yeah, that's what everybody knows.

Yeah, but you know, I'm the kind of guy that pulls Brian to paulm out and I probably am wrong. But a lot of people. Have you noticed how often they're they're saying Chris was right?

What online? Like on twin Yes that's right. Yeah, we have a lot of self doubt.

Yeah, I'm riddled with it.

Yeah I relate. Look at that moon. I'm sorry, but look at it. Oh it's round and it's big moon report happening.

And when I'm throwing a gig, I just can't help myself. I act like an animal.

What's that?

That?

Sir makes a lot of were wolf raw It's very lesser known.

I would like to brag and say that I thought it was sir mix a Lot's baby got back.

Yeah, well he likes the moon round and big and when he's throwing a gig. See, I just repurposed because I don't like to talk about lady spots.

You can, though I think I feel empowered by it.

I'm not gonna talk. I don't even look at women this last month. I do not make eye contact. I will no longer defend them on Twitter because I'll get blocked.

Good.

Oh, I'll tell you that one later. But yeah, I just it's I'm Twitter isn't the place to actually communicate, I've realized in the least, and I've I've kind of because I'm at home so much, just because I am lately Yep, I rely on it for interactions with real people that I do know, and there's so much room for tone being misread that I've I hate. I'm I kind of want to throw my phone in a bowl of rye for a couple of months and just not deal with it because I'm realizing it's not making me happy,

Well I am. I have a couple of things. My friend Bradford made up this term. He calls it, uh the digital uh uh he looping. I think he calls it looping where you just go like Twitter, email, I do a yachtzi. You just go back and forth between like four apps that you're obsessed with and you just keep clicking, clicking, clicking, clicking.

Yes, and I even got on I'm on the day bumble uh and I have it. I don't think I will ever. First of all, it's lowered myself a steam. There's there's and you're judging it's not It's not natural to look at four pictures of a human and swipe on them. I'm not trying to sound like I'm better one, but I'm like it makes me feel gross, yes, But then you start to overlook it like guns in a video game, and you just start getting rid of people and it's like, nope, hate the sweater, Yeah, two of

Well, you know what's funny too. It the excitement that you feel looks like the excitement that you feel in real life when you meet a person that you actually have chemistry with, feels these days like such a rare experience because nobody is paying attention to anything really anymore.

Well, that's how women, I think one of the ways they're maybe better developed because I think most men are like, what the looks? First, I think, well.

Yeah, I think you're neurotically, you're neurologically set up that way though, yeah, vision based.

Yeah, but no, that's I don't know. I'm just it horrifies me. And I can't imagine me a person that's not scared about my well being just meeting a stranger somewhere, much less, you know, one of these rapey dudes. You know, it's the fucking scariest concept.

It's crazy.

But everyone does it.

Everyone does it in the same way. Everyone gets into an uber.

And I write, exactly, that's that's.

Like stranger dangers. Step one, stranger danger. But we all do it.

Someone tweeted a thing or had a joke about it, so I'm sorry, but I don't know. But I'll butcher it so it's no longer their thing.

Oh nice.

You know we're always told to never talk to strangers and you never get in it, and you never go online and talk to strangers. Now they've combined the two where you go online to have a stranger come and you actually get in a car with them. See, I butchered it. But there is a point there. Yes, the internet and strangers are supposed to be dangerous, and then you combine them both and it's become this convenience.

You know. What's how I think they did it because I remember when Uber very very first came out and my friend and Ed Hanson explained it to me. He was like, you can get like a like a car, like how celebrities get driven from their house to a talk show or whatever. You can you can call a car and it's super cheap. It's like twenty bucks, right, and it's called uber x or whatever the fancy uber is. And so in my mind everyone was going to come and pick me up wearing like a suit, right, and

The first Uber rides I took it was that way, and it was an escalator, an suv or whatever. There wasn't all these subcategories of the type of person that would come with a classic human you want a scombat It was always yeah it was and it was cheap, and it was like weird. I just had a giant suburban pick me up and the guy was wearing a suit. Was he really yeah, because I think for a while it was like at the at the beginning of it,

Yeah you could, Yeah you could.

Cap driver can murder people Willie Nilly, Yeah think can you.

Never see him again?

Yeah?

Yeah, you're right. I also have had some of the best conversations with uber drivers, like getting into like it always I always start the conversation with is the traffic as bad now or worse than it was five years ago in your opinion? And then we have a long conversation about how too many people live in LA and you know, it's all getting super crazy and it's bad for your health. That's where we start. But then we go into I've had some like highly philosophical conversations. I love it.

I love talking to uber guys. Maybe it's a testament to have being lonelyish. I will talk their ear off and on a plane. You bet, old lady put down those needles.

But that's her insolin. She has to have those needles.

Well, she shouldn't be using them to make a.

Scarf and not while I'm talking.

Yeah, we got stuff. What was it like in the fifties? Both fists under my chin?

Eighteen fifties, did you know?

I don't think I ever told you this. My great grandma who lived to be I think one hundred and one saw three centuries. Yeah, she was born in eighteen ninety eight, I believe. And like, let's just say two thousand and let's just say that equals one hundred and one.

Let's all say it together, everybody.

Now we're finally using our backseat chorus. I'm excited for Christmas.

Oh I am too.

It's funny because I think it's gonna get me out of this slump.

Yes, it will, because it's the.

Only Christmas and the excitement about it and the way you feel and even the spiritual it's the only time of the year. I'm like, maybe we don't just it's updive.

Maybe people do care about each other.

Yeah, yeah, and I think that it even my the guy next year Walmart with a slaveless flannel in the fart hat is in the same Like I can actually talk to him about something. Yes, Like he could have a Trump a shirt with an AR fifteen on it.

That's a kill all reporters.

Whatever, whatever clever bumper sticker you have with your machine gun shirt. I can overlook that and go. Your nephew likes lagos too, you.

Know, yeah, because example, because sometimes the politics are mhm, it's almost like sometimes I feel like people use politics to distance themselves, but if you're not allowed to talk about them, which these days almost everybody's like that. Oh my god, yeah, Matt Ingebreton Street, that's our guest today being blocked is entirely blocked by two large fire Is it three? Oh wait, there's like a fucking parade.

It's like it is it? Or is there? I mean, we have to know what this is.

This can't be.

Okay, it's holiday, it's got everything is a shooting now. That's why I'm taught, That's why I can't and what you're saying right now about politics getting in the way of people connecting. That is the first thing I look at a Twitter, and that's the first thing I look at. And all I've been thinking about in the last couple of days is that Trump's gonna get fired because you know, they've they've proven that he met the Russian meddling and then also that he tried to stop them from investigating

It's horrifying.

And then you see a group of people caroling and I feel like someone's been shot.

Yes, well it was. It was. It's three long fire trucks blocking off the streets, right, and that looked like super emergency, not plain old heart attack. But it looked like no one come here for a really long time.

Yeah, well, either that or they're lined up so evil can Evil can jump them.

Oh I didn't think about Okay, we hold on, we're very close to.

That one does. No one thinks about evil anymore because he's dead. They are looking up as where our guests will be. The very tall, very interesting, very funny Matt.

Ingebretz, who is one of my favorite guests we've ever had. I feel like the show we did with him that day was one of the funniest shows we've ever Yeah.

He's he's a smart guy, and he's gone more going on in his head than just comedy jokes. You know what I mean?

I do.

Well. Yeah, he's a very well rounded person, and he has a show coming up that we should talk to him about, because he's got a wonderful show coming out on what do you call it?

I believe it's Comedy Central, and I believe I have a small role in it.

What Yes, Oh shit, we got we got anecdotes of plenty. Okay, I guess we're gonna have to go round the corner here.

Yeah, maybe I'm gonna turn that on again.

Okay, this is one of those times where now we need to look at our phone and fake talk as we do.

We've been given some heavy duty talking.

Yeah that's true.

You know, it's pretty NonStop heavy duty.

Yeah, maybe we have a segment called quiet time. Yeah, nobody talks.

People would have, you know, appreciate it.

I suppose it's something you know, Maybe this is a chance to unplug while you're listening to a podcast. We're gonna give you a chance to go off the.

Grid, and I'll just walk you through this. Off your shoes right under your desk there, ye feel that, Keep your keep your socks on.

Don't look at anybody, then they won't look at you.

I hope your cubicle is carpeted because you're just gonna drive your little toes and making little fists on the floor. How does that feel? All right? Now, Well, we're gonna pull your hands up to the back of your neck and just kind of elongate your spine towards the sky. All your energy. Now, now, now, where are we? Now? Oh? I got okay. We there's just a holiday funfair getting in the way of our friend and us.

Oh I see, I see, I see. Okay, it's up a little bit more. Oh okay, we'll be fine.

We will be fine.

We're gonna we're all gonna make it, not only on this car trip, but America. We're gonna be okay. Yes, don't worry. Even if there's full scale revolution, right, we're gonna live.

It's not gonna happen in December because no one works in December. Even revolutionaries.

He's going to go to Palm Springs.

Yeah. The revolution will probably be during pilot season.

That's right. Everyone's already feeling very rejected and they have nothing to lose.

Did you So you did go home for Thanksgiving? I did, and it was telling me some of the fun things your father or sister said.

Fun of family quotes. God, damn it, I read a couple.

I'm setting you up to the sea.

Well my dad, No, I can't remember any of the tweets.

My dad.

Well, he always makes us watch sports that we don't care about. Then I pretend I care about sports sarcastically, just to just to fuck with him.

That's what I do.

Do you really, tear dad?

I don't care about watching sports, and he's way into it. But it's fun to sit with him.

Yeah, but do you like my dad will be like telling me about individual players lives. I'll be like, oh ye, and then it'll be like, ah, you be quiet because he knows I'm being sarcastic.

Oh no, no, I don't. Yeah, I don't don't. We don't. I don't jest my father. I have a little respect for the man. Sorry, that was you know, that was a joke. I was doing it. I was doing it to you. Just now.

Oh, I see, you're justing me, but you won't just him Yes, you're right. Fine, I mean it's not very common, but fine. Usually we just our parents.

Right and respect our friends like father figures.

I mean, I paid for your fucking college, you did, you think half of it?

The other was what's her name?

Okay, so you stopped driving?

Yeah, yeah, there's a reason both your bumpers are torn off, revealing wires and bolts.

This is La is one of the only places where people, when they're lost and often are, they just let their car kind of drift until they figure out where they're going. They don't pull over, they don't like make it right, They just kind of it's just kind of like, well, let's see what happened.

You We were kind of doing it, but right now that's true.

Right now, no one's around. We did the same and it was on a similar corner to that guy. I just I just think exactly what that guy did was doing oh drifting, fucking drifting on a Sunday afternoon.

In diesel type of drifting.

Let's go to Tokyo drifting. I saw it in the theater.

It's the perfect time of year to go to Tokyo Drift. Candy canes, little dogs, little girls, lots of snowsh old man bringing gifts, father yells, sister heads. Everybody loves the Tokyo Christmas Drift.

Sorry, it's okay.

You forgot the original Tokyo premise, but it's still The point is it's about Christmas.

That's right, everybody, And what is Christmas based in Christ? So open your bibles to page.

First Corinthians eight nine eight.

Wait, that's code who Now everyone knows where to come and kill me?

It always goes back to murder.

Wait, now, I thought I knew where matt Ingebrutson lives. Oh, but apparently he has moved.

Oh okay, am I wrong? I do not know where. I do not remember.

You don't remember where I'm wrong.

I do not remember where we picked them up in the past.

Oh I see, yeah, I'm you know. I'm on the wrong street right now. But I'm gonna go. I'm gonna drift on down to it's one.

Block away, drift on through to the other side.

Yep.

Do you think people get sick of my impromptu song parodies?

I never and if they do. They're joyless fox, because what was better than that?

I wish you had said a joyless fox, because I'm kind of attracted to pretty people that got a chip on their shoulder. You're a joyless.

Fox, sir, what you're a bummer hottie?

Look at that grumpy cougar.

Oh okay, I see, I actually put the directions on, which is what I should have done all along.

Oh yeah, you know what so close now that straight rings a bell. He does live in the same house.

Oh okay, I guess it's me.

No, that's not what I was doing, but I guess sort.

Of at the end of the day. Yes, it's exactly what happened.

I went What did I do? I went to I just went to Thanksgiving a house of skateboarders or my friend at TIBA. He's like a well known photographer of skateboarding and basketball, and they were like, it was the best food. Isn't it funny that later in life, young, your friends make better Thanksgiving meals than you ever had from any of your dry turkey grandma's. Yes, Oh my god, it was good.

Because people really care and some people.

And they're following recipes, not they're what they used to do back in seventy eight, or.

Like maybe their their mom was a really good cook and you would have never known it because they just when they were in their twenties just ate mic Ray popcorn and got drunk right right like you? Why would you know?

Yeah, I am Did I tell you? I also went into a priority. Did I tell you how I met Terry Bradshaw? And yeah? Oh I did that. We talked about that on here. Yes, God, I'm out of stories.

Hey listen, we're about to make some.

Oh, let's make history.

We're gonna Uh. Those fire trucks really fucked me up.

Yeah they really did.

I mean, I just yeah, I get it, I get it.

I get it. Yeah, they really. We were thrown for a loop. There's a lot.

I mean, what then the living Hell?

Well, the night of the Living Hell? What the whid world of hell?

It is a wide world, several levels, different types of tortures. Yes, oh I get it. Look we're here. He think he did move.

Yeah, into a beautiful mansion.

I guess he's a mansoneer these days.

Well, I guess you know what they say, get a TV show, they pay, Well, that's right. These houses are silly if he lives on the street, I'm going to be very upset with him.

You skin of a bitch matting the brutes.

Here we go, maddening a.

Let's okay, I'm texting him now.

Yes, I do. We have to address that. We're almost a full hour late.

I told him. I don't know if we have addressed to anybody else.

Oh okay, good good. I'm glad you told him.

Yeah, I told him, because it's the thing that means you are mad.

But you just told him.

I just told him.

Did you tell him you're going to be I told you.

I told him twenty minutes late.

Did you the doctor that sample of your cerebral Yeah? I gave him a piece of my mind. Did you I'm gonna come up with a third one? Okay, did you did?

You's a lot of pressure you.

Did you have a one way conversation with your friend? I gave him a talking to?

Oh? Talking too?

Yeah?

Did you have a two part conversation with this? That's easy for me. I was just sitting back here.

Do you hand your friend that muppet shaped like a number from Sesame Straight? Oh? Yeah, I gave him a talking too. There we go, fucking fixed.

It you triple fixed that shy.

Someone should give me a job. I'm I'm doing okay, just doing comedy lately and drawing. What have you been doing me?

I've been doing podcasting and doing podcasts.

Did you go anywhere fun? Where's the funnest place you guys have come gone to do your murder?

Florida?

Oh? Really? Huh oh that's great? A Hi.

Is that opening?

Oh? Oh oh, there's a mic that might trip you up? That Karen, Chris, buddy, here's too in a masculine way. It's good to see you.

Good to see you too. Thanks for having me, Thanks for giving me a ride in your car. The name of the podcast, right, yes, giving me a d in your car.

It's time to give you a ride in this car, Karen.

This car is great.

Yeah. It's a beautiful vehicle, isn't it.

Thank you so much? I built it from scratch, which is probably my proudest piece.

You're an auto worker.

I really am right in Detroit.

That's how I think of you.

Nay, an auto artist.

I would say, Oh, I was so far away. I was basically driving to year old apartment.

Did you move?

I did move. I used to live over on Clayton.

I was wrong.

Where do you live, Karen?

What's your address? Why didn't you just say that out loud right now?

Okay, live in Burbank?

Oh you do? Did you? You still live over here?

I did in the nineties when I was on drugs.

Hell. Yeah, that's why I'm over.

Here right now. Yeah.

There was a time, I believe when one of our first episodes with Rob Delaney and I did say his I dress out loud, that's right, and I said, no, I'll addit that and I think I forgot I guess what. No one murdered him.

So far he had to move to England.

Yeah, maybe that's the reason. It wasn't the show they gave him. Speaking speaking of shows being given or making nothing, no one gave you anything. You you built it yourself, like.

That's right.

That was given to me like a lottery. They did.

They still do it that way.

It was a raffle ticket. I a lot of raffle ticket and then.

I wear it.

What show.

Comedy central dot com? The show it's a webs show about what the website comedy central dot com.

Oh that must be good.

It's wonderful. I liked the last season called Adamfilms dot com.

I remember, yeah, come on?

Was that that was Adam Films, the one with the child pimp where I was like, this is inappropriate and I don't like it.

I don't know that was It was Comedy Central though. They were just doing that thing that I don't know why people do it where they launch a new like when Spider the ski clothing company made snowboard stuff. They didn't just call it Spider snowboard clothes, you know, they had to call it strike and then it went out of business because everyone's like, what strike. I don't know what I'm saying.

No, no, because your parallel is is a like an extreme sports parallel, like.

Fair Banks to be your brand manager. He has no experience but a lot of ideas.

And you can snowboard. That's the goodness.

Do you still snowboarders?

I got this whole body pain thing, but I will one day.

How's that going?

Oh? Great? This is great.

It's nice how your body just becomes more painful as the years go on.

I gotta I think I will snowboard this winter. I got a fake hip and it feels good.

And you want you want to fling it down a mountain.

Yeah, I think, uh, if I did go snowboarding, it's my other, my untouched hip that I'm worried about. Now, that's the one that's really popping and locking.

You don't let anyone touch it.

No, no, certainly not a dot. No slow dancing your hands above the two feet.

This is a dumb question. You have two hips, it's not just one big hip. I know there's two sides to the hip.

You're gonna have to do a snowboard sparks analogy because I don't know what you're saying.

We get a textbook out. I want to take a look at this.

You know, mountain us down on two sides.

Right now, you're speaking my language. I already know what you meant because I heard jokingly starting a sports analogy. Yeah, I have two yeah, two independent hips. One of them they're both worn out. One of them was more worn out. So they put metal basically on my bone and then in the socket and now I feel great after months of pain, but feel great. So when is Matt When is your show coming out?

It comes out January seventeenth, twenty eighteen, and it is no longer called Hunt in Deville.

Under Mifflin it is now called Corporate.

Yeah, and you're in an episode of it. Did you know that?

Yeah? Well I never know, you know if.

I'm do you know what we were doing that day, Chris, I do know that now I'm.

Super dumb as shit. I could be edited out.

That's what I thought. That's what I always am gonna have always a chance.

Yeah, No, that was a fun moment. It was funny, And then afterwards I was like, that was fun. I bet that stays in.

Are you an office worker?

He's on a corporate retreat, yes, nice.

Nice doing extreme sports.

No, he's in a couple of scenes. One of them. I won't spoil anything. He has one of the funniest lines I think in the show. But it's it's in they're in like a share circle and at a corporate retreat and he shares a deep, dark secret that he should not have shared. Watched the show to find out.

Yeah, what my secret is?

I really like your guys promos because they're super plain. Yeah, and it makes it not a bad way, but like it makes you go, what is this because it just is like comedy centralist, corporate?

Yes, weod where have you seen the promos?

There's billboards around town.

Oh god, I haven't even got to look up, Chris. I gotta get out of the house the billboards.

You're running a red lights.

Yeah, he really was just unfair.

Have you guys ever had any intense road ragie or incidents on this podcast?

Yes, yes he did.

In just one episode. There were two pretty pretty clearly. Like was Todd Glass. It was Tod Glass.

Yeah.

First we saw this guy on a bike. I did antagonize him. He was like a he was riding his bike, but he's being very strange and weaving around member and he had that cocky look on his face, and I just said, yeah, yeah, we see you. And he took out his bike lock and chased us whoa and tried to swing and hit Karen's mirror off and then just shot into an unprotected intersection and did cars almost hit him. I thought that he almost died and I don't know.

And he was he was like knocked out before he hit the ground. It was one of the craziest, most violent things I've.

Ever seen, and the guy was not satisfied, and he's like not knocked out enough, and he was grabbing I'm and slamming and sat down. It was very I remember it very much affecting Todd Glass emotionally.

Have you ever been in a fight?

Yes, yeah, okay, that's the episode of this far with me forever.

We'll never stop driving the car together.

None of them are ever. They all make me feel gross. I've been in a few fights.

Wait a second, I think we talked about this when you were on the show last time, Matt, because if I am guessing correctly, you've never been in a fight.

I was punched in fifth grade. Okay, yeah, but we might have. Maybe this is my only topic of conversation.

Are you're the only question you ever asked? You anything?

So little to offer the world?

I think that it probably has a lot to do with You're You're a tall, intimidating, more intimidating than me, and I'm shorter and everyone so I write punch people. Yeah, that guy when he just passed me on the low and he's going to do it for that.

Guy, cumulating that guy must be Italian? What the fuck?

It's Yeah, you're basically allowed to be racist against.

Italians, right, and they're the only ones left.

Yeah, you can just straight up do it and it's kind of fine.

Well, the color of his car was that of a pizza box though it was like black and red stripes, and there was a little green logo on it.

Someone described this terrible bike this guy is riding right here, or girl.

It's a banana seat cruiser. Gooy. But she was easy on the eyes, surprisingly, and then she would ask Chris, I think she was Italian.

Throw your door open.

That's how my mom met my lunch lady once.

Now he's just in front of me. You didn't get any further surf passing me on the left.

Oh guy, I wish we could pass him.

It would be really this dumb, dumb man.

God, he's dumb.

Definitely a man. I know that. Yeah.

One time my lunch lady had a broken arm and I realized that was the lady my mom threw open the door and she was riding a bike on our street. Oh yeah, and then I had to put it together. She was also had her own access talk show What.

I Was.

May have been. It was called by the Way with v Thompson.

The lunch lady.

Yeah.

Yeah, and I realized that later in my Oh wow, he's doing it again and he almost hit that car.

Okay, speed up, watch an accident.

You're about to see that fight you want to see? So goddamn bed by the way with v.

Thompson is the best thing I've ever heard. This car is passing people on the left on Sountain.

I am, wow, let's can we call the cops on him and let's do it.

Let's just tailor.

Yeah, yeah, let's do it.

You guys meet us on sunset.

I'm gonna. I'm gonna all right, no, no, non't okay? Can I say? Quit driving like that?

Do you remember the bike lock incidents?

Chris Man?

I know I'm a giant man, but I have nothing to offer the world and I can't fight. You.

Just punch your arm out the window and just see what happens. Just punch his car.

I maybe it has to do with where I grew up and people were quick to punch each other. Good month.

You're mountain people out there.

Yeah yeah, people just drank a lot and they fight out aboard them. Montana not anymore. I don't think I think it's better now.

Matt, You're from Texas, where no one is violent.

Yeah, just a bunch of perfectly peaceful, law biting, upstanding citizens, forward thinking yep.

Oddly though, I was in Dallas yesterday and they had these lime green bikes and you just get on an app and for one dollar for an hour, you get this bike. It just unlocks via the app.

You're right.

There was thousands of them in downtown Dallas, which is for them to be, you know, a classic oil town, that progressive. It was. It was pretty impressive.

I like Dallas.

Yeah, Dallas was awesome.

Yeah, we were just there. It was.

I was in. I went to call it an Austin, which is a cool city.

Yeah, I used to live there.

Oh yeah, I forget that about you. Yeah, that's our connection.

I forget I forget about our connection too. We've made so many other more valid connections, like what.

Guy is named for sex? That's an awesome connection.

Yeah.

Yeah, and really trump that Austin.

Oh did you notice it's a full moon tonight?

I did notice that. Does that mean anything to you?

It does?

Are you a Taurus?

Yes? Will they say that usually people are more violent or like that, the e rs are more crowded? Really, and police there's more police activity on full note.

Sure really and.

Say that as well, there's more wolf men. The wolfman attest to it.

What are your thoughts on this whole cosmic like astrology and everything.

Matt, I think that my I feel like there probably is something going on, but I don't think anybody knows what the fuck is right going on. I don't think that, uh, the person writing the Sagittarius, which is what I am paragraph in the in the newspaper, knows anything.

I agree such a Sagittarius thing to say that you have to know about that.

Someone said that to me, and I'm Aquarius. I said, I don believing And there's that's so aquarius of you.

That's what I say every time.

Yeah. Yeah, I am getting bored not believing in anything, and so I'm thinking about diving back into believing in something, right astrology.

You know what, just just have it be church.

Let it be astrology. That would be amazing. If you're just getting insanely.

In, I go, you know, waist deep into astrology because you're letting it happen. Yeah. I just want something.

Sometimes like a life threatening illness or a sudden death in the family will kick you into believing something all right.

Yeah yeah, yeah, or make you less of a believer in anything? Right? Yeah?

Why would they have done this to me?

Yeah? Exactly? Man. I do remember one time I was leaving a bar and there was a drunk lady that looked like she drank a lot. And as as she was leaving, she looked at me and my friend and she said.

I believe in God.

She said, I believe in God Jesus.

Like, how much have you had to? She said, hello Aquarius, Hello Scorpio. And we just looked at each other and said, I'm I'm Are you a Scorpio? I'm She in passing by looking.

At us, my favorite.

Wow.

It was horrifying to me.

I love it.

I believe I left that moment and went home.

You left Texas.

I know that was Montana. That was a long time ago. With my friend Zach. He's dead now. No who's died in your friend's circle?

I got a few, yeah, but not that many. I'm still I'm still skating on, like I'm writing that pocket where people are just starting My friends are just starting to get married, and not very many of them are dying yet. Right, It's a lovely time in my life.

That's nice.

They call that the Golden year.

Yeah yeah, yeah, wait till you hit forty boy, everyone's going to be dead.

I do remember. Yeah, my grandma when she was older, just every time I saw her, she just listed off the people who had died. That was like her opening conversation.

That's like, yeah, my dad went to his high school reunion. I guess the fifth one. Yeah, and uh and and or six. I don't know, it doesn't I bet all people talk about is who's dead and what joints you've had replaced? That's all they talk about.

So and Game of Thrones and of.

Course go ot and who's died and got joints replaced?

On the Do.

You guys keep up with Game of Thrones?

I love it?

I do too.

It's my Kardashian It's so good it is.

It just gives me all the stuff I want. It's like, yeah, show me sex and violence and incest.

Yep.

The thing I want to watch on HBO is incest.

It turns out I made my sister and my niece watch. Is her name Leanna Moormont, the Little Queen, the nine year old Queen.

Okay, oh, she's amazing.

The Bear Island Queen. That kid I made my sister and my niece watched that speech that she gives of and still you did not answer the call or whatever she says to everybody. And then after that, and my sister was kind of like, thanks for what having my daughter watch Game of Thrones, right, But then my niece looked it up and the actress that plays her is on a TV show called The Worst Witch. And my niece started watching The Worst Witch. She's like, it's really good, Auntie,

She's a fan of that girl that's probably her age. Yes, Oh that's awesome. Yeah, yeah, that kid blows me away.

She's amazing.

Do you feel as an aunt are you like trying to infiltrate your niece's mind?

Yes, because only because Yes, For a little while, she went through a phase like she used to have great taste. She loved like Peanuts and like Snoopy cartoons and stuff. She's a good taste in the beginning. Then when she was like seven, she started loving Gilbert. She started becoming alright Republican, No, she'd be started loving Full House and she would recite entire episodes to me like, and then the little girls went upstairs and I was like, I can't listen to this. I'm really mad.

At you right now. Yeah.

Yeah, but now she's coming back around to She likes, you know, YouTube shows and things that her friends.

Like, and you're slipping her Zeppelin CD. That's right, get her some skinner to take.

This is a band called Traffic. You're not that popular. It's more of a musicians musicians.

Especially these B sides. It's just moments where they fuck up.

I'm getting her into a ton of jam bands.

Setting her up for success. Chris. Do you have n nephews?

Yeah, yeah, I have. I have two beautiful little twin nieces. Well they're not little anymore. They're almost teenagers. My nephew's seventeen.

Now, they're older than you.

That's crazy.

He's a giant football player. He's a version of me that's taller and more physically superior.

But is he as funny as you? Chris?

He's very funny, and he does impressions. He does a Jason Statham. I can't even touch that.

Why don't you just go jump off a cliff? Then?

Yeah? And I never played football, and he listens to cool mears bands that I've never even heard of.

Like, uh, you know, Karen, I think you should consider him as your new co host for this podcast.

Oh good idea, How is it?

They're great? They were great. They were great. He's got wide hips and a big bubbly ass. Alex be listening right now, and that's Alex.

Sorry, must be weird.

Those are my mom's words, my sister, I mean, his mom. That's God.

Just blame every woman in your life, but yourself sounds fine.

I'm every woman.

It's all in me. What about you, Matt? Do you have that?

I do not have any aet my I have two older sisters and one younger sister. My little sister's about to get married, and my two older sisters are not married and don't have kids. Okay, so we're counting on my little sister to pull her weight. And because my mom is the type of person who if she had a grand children, it would grandchild, it would complete her life, and we've all let her down in a huge, huge way.

Yeah, my dad wants more, and he's looking at me.

That's very great.

Yeah, he just wants his hands on another baby.

Yeah, it's is this the mini that was going crazy ship. No, damn, it's not even a mini Oh no, wait, so, Matt, you grew up with three sisters.

Three sisters.

I don't think we talked about that last time. That's fascinating.

Yeah.

Do you think it's crafted your personality?

I think so.

Yeah, I do too.

In hell, well, I think that Chris, did you have brothers?

No, I had one sister.

I guess I can't come back because I didn't have brothers. But I feel like if you have brothers, there's a greater chance of you being a bad person. I think if you have if you're a dude with brothers, it's like too much just beating each other up as a child, or just like weird competitive. I just I had like three sisters taming all of my worst instincts. I think.

Yeah.

Well, and also you get you learn a lesson of that, Like women are in and of the world, so it's not you don't aren't shocked and upset by it once you get out into the world.

That's exactly right. Yeah, my littles are gonna be married December fifteenth, and I'm I am officiating the wedding.

Oh wow, that's cool.

Are you looking forward to that.

I am, and I have also put off writing the ceremony until now. So I'm writing it and it's hard. I'm like, I love the beast. So far, I've written a lot of jokes that like two pages of yes of like jokes that I'm gonna have to cut most up because nobody gives a shit. Yeah, but the part that I don't have down yet is where I need to be, Like, marriage is this I don't know any I don't know anything about marriage, and I don't I think marriage is kind of dumb. I'm sorry, I think

It's like, so it's like marriage is what you make it? Yes, type of what's the better way to say the thing you actually mean? Yeah?

Can you ghost write this wedding ceremony?

I'm happy to ye. I'm actually just gonna pull something out of like a quotable website actually.

Send it to Kurt Brownholder helped me. He has officiated a handful of boddings and has like a whole format written out that he's me and so I'm just like filling in the dots.

Like he's done a dozen.

Yeah, something like, wow, he's a priest, right.

Yeah, Kurt Browlinholder is a priest.

I can see him being really good at that though.

Yeah he Yeah, they're really funny. He sent me a couple ceremonies and they read just like funny stand up backs of his Oh wow, but yeah, so I'm doing that.

And it's basically like when Emily was seven years old. We knew that she would this because she did that.

Yeah. Ye, we shared bunk beds as a kid, So I'm going to mention how much we fought about bunk bed Who got the top bunk? Is that good?

Yeah? And you should compare it with who gets the top with her? Yeah, I mean yea, make it about him.

And Karen, you're out.

I was going to say the same thing. You just interrupted episode you're excited to be back?

And then cool, Oh yeah that's nice, a little sunset gradient, Well, hello, are.

You what's going on? I didn't realize that I was actually joke. I just joke like flirt sits at him, and but he looked straight.

Up yeah sensual.

I don't mean we all were looking him right in the eyes and he was mid buggeryat Oh god, yeah, hey, what happens in your car? Racism?

Yeah, it's okay, it's okay now, Karen, it's not ok Was that man attractive? Did you find that man attractive?

Now? That man looked like someone who would be on the show Arrow. Yes, I'm not interested in actor looking type people.

He looked a little like a guy who would be the lead of a country band that plays at bars in Austin too. He had a little bit of like that look.

I bet you if he got out and stood up, he would have a lot of bracelets on, and he would have jeans that had embroidery on the bath.

Karen, what do you have against embroidery.

I was stabbed in the eye by an embroiderous by.

When you were three, And that's how you say the word.

Now, that's what gave me my speech.

And it happened, you know, Stallone and Maria Shriver.

You know what I feel bad about right now? We didn't get your coffee, man, and we got ourselves skilled.

And can I tell you something, I would have loved a coffee.

Oh that makes it worse.

I'm going to just get out of the car right now, go back to it's serious. No, I'm okay. I'm actually going to a coffee shop after this where I will get myself a free coffee.

Oh, at yours where your comedy concert.

Is, right, that's right, my comedy concert.

Yeah, is that? Does it start at nine or eight?

Eight? Oh? Oh?

Show good? Oh good? I said, shoot, but I meant good, Oh god god shoot, oh show show.

And you guys have both done my comedy show, and you're both very funny on it.

The last time I did your comedy show, I feel like I didn't do well because I started by saying I don't like cou Yeah, I basically did. I was kind of like, this is comedy's pointless.

It does. I don't remember you saying that, but I do feel that right now about comedy. Yeah, it's like what are we doing?

Yeah?

Do we all hate it right now?

It's all the same.

Yeah, I feel it doesn't feel great right now?

Yeah, me either, me either.

I'd rather just write think pieces.

Yeah.

Do you remember do you remember Matt that time that you, because of rain, your show was indoors in your bookstore and this guy came in with his girlfriend and you just started attacking him in the most why.

It was it was in a bad mood that night.

It was so great though. You really were specifically just and they were laughing at first, and then you kept doing it, and then they decided they'd leave.

It's so funny too, Like I was laughing because as a principal in the past couple of years, I'm deliberately nice to people I talked to in the audience or I try to make challenge myself to do that. But there was a time when I was just bitter and mean to what I was talking to.

Yeah. I loved watching it because it's not your personality. I'd like that with anyone where I see them be mean on stage a role and then and then in person they are the sweetest, you know what I mean. And that's me talking about you. Yeah, you got sweet is the word I use.

There was a one time at Largo, Zach Alphanax was on stage and he walked outside with the microphone and was on the sidewalk and he made this couple that were walking by come in and stand on stage, and then he started interviewing them and come to find out they both worked at Halliburton and he began to ream them and it was totally real and he was not

It's funny when you said that, I was thinking of him because he is someone that is sweet in person, so sweet, and and he can be mean and scary as a as a movie character or whatever on stage. That's what did he say to them.

It was just like, because he's so politically kind of and always has been very dialed into like that kind of politics of like those what's happening now, which is basically all the insane psychopaths that aren't so greedy they don't give a fuck about what happens to anybody.

Yeah, the money behind podcast.

Yeah, and so it was just like the war machine and you know you kill you know, you're killing the lower and middle class. So that what I can't remember. It was really heavy and at the time I never knew. I didn't follow anything or pay attention to anything like what is he talking about? Like I am on his side, I don't know what's happening.

Oh wow.

Another bad moment I had on stage once, which was another sort of turning point where it's like, I need to stop being mean to Heckler's. Yeah, there was. I was a Westside comedy theater and I was in the green room and I kept hearing like people dealing with the Heckler outside, right, and then they'd come back and to be like, there's this fucking woman and drunk woman

You're a fucking nightmare.

I thought that people would be on my side. I had the impression that she.

Was right right, They're like, we like what she's doing.

Yeah.

The problem when you're getting a report from the other performers in the green room about a heckler, it doesn't always mean heckling. It means that they're talking or being annoying to just you. Yes, and they're not turning going announcing their heckls to the the rest of the group. Yes, and that's that's what that Probably the audience didn't even know that lady was being terrible the whole time.

Probably the only thing I'm proud of, Chris, Do you have any heckler takedown videos on YouTube.

Of me doing that?

Yeah?

I was in Boise a couple of weeks ago and I did.

Heckler. No.

I went, I got off stage and I grabbed the table and I said, you both have to leave right now. Yeah, And then and they eventually did. And then after the show, they were waiting there because they knew one of my friends at home, and I got in his face and yelled at him. But there was no physical takedown. But they are changing. They're they're printing out cards there that say please be quiet, and because no one was dealing with.

The Yeah, the cards will do it. That'll take care of it.

Well if if you think about it, like someone's standing there, like a person that is non confrontational trying to get you to be quiet by standing by the table. That doesn't register with people. But if they receive a card, I think that's a child that's in trouble. It's like a business card that says you're being disrupted. They used to do at the Velveta.

Room and it worked great.

They're getting past a note.

Yes, and you look at the note and they have to read it and it says you're being disrupted, and it's all official looking. That I think all comedy clubs should do that.

That's a good idea.

Yeah, yeah, And so I think they're going to do that now because there was a that's a town that likes to drink, like all of I know and all of Montana where I'm from, and all of Texas where everyone drinks. The whole country is fucking drunk and ship and they that's why people talk. And if they if they get the little cards, they might go oh okay, oh I see yeah, and then it's not. It's not awkward for anyone.

It's less unless they're so drunk they're saying double and when they see this, it's there like it's a snake. Yeah, there's a paper snake in my.

Hand, and they start screaming they're scared of snake.

Do you feel like everyone thinks they're funny?

I feel like I got everyone people in the audience at comedy shows for the first time ever while all of a sudden think they're funny, right, that somehow they feel empowered by watching comedy.

Well, because it's easy to sit there and go, oh, I could do this, or I can think of funny thing.

Yes, yes, because all he's doing is holding a mic and put he put on pants. I can do that right right? Yeah?

Well, and that was the first open mics I ever did. I was just watching and I was like, well, I'm at least as funny as these fucking assholes.

Where was that in Austin?

That was actually weirdly out here. I was out here for a summer in college, and I did an open mic at the Rainbow Bar and Grill and then a Hot Yeah, and then at Ha Ha Cafe that the Nightmare club in North That is.

The first place I did stand up to Patrick Keane was working the door. Yeah, and uh yeah, Howard Kramer took me to Haha Cafe.

I did a bringer show at Haha Cafe. Who'd you bring some college friends of mine that were out here? And I had a great set, or in my memory, a great set. I mean, yeah, I'm sure it was absolutely terrible.

You well have a recording of it right here.

Daren. Where was the first time you did stand up or what was the first time?

It was?

In Sacramento. I was right after I flunked out of college, so I had to do something. Yeah, get back my police trust and I went to h I met a comic at a bar and he and I were like, she was he was a friend of my friends, and he and I started talking and then I was just

No, Karen, Yes, of college, I sure did not smart enough.

No. I couldn't read, never have been able to.

That's great. How long did you go to college?

For a year and a half?

And were you just what was the experience? You were just like, no, thank you.

I was. It was the first time I went from going to a high school with three hundred and fifty people in a town of three thirty thousand to going to Sacramento and the school itself had thirty thousand people in it. It was like a big commuter school and I had been I was on my own for the first time, and I was like, I actually don't have to go to class. I can drink beer and go to Burger King every god damn day. So that's exactly what I'm going to do.

That sounds like a great life.

It was. I've had a great life. And then I shoot myself in the head.

Oh my god. I just have you guys ever seen the footage of that news lady doing that.

Are you talking about?

Yes, I haven't seen it.

I haven't seen, but it made me watch YouTube the actual suicide.

I watched one and it was it was something bud, but that one was not good for my brain.

It was very bad, very very bad.

Did anyone watch the tiger eat that man at the zoo? No, that was just one. People have to stop posting these videos. It was a friend of mine and I said, you can't. I did not want to see that. And then all the comments were like me either, me, but a tiger killed a man. You can imagine how awful and brutal that was.

Sounds beautiful. It was just it was to me, that's what that's sexy to me.

It was a regular motion, very crunchy, very bloody.

That's what I'm into.

Yeah, now, Karen, the last time I was on this podcast, I don't know if you remember, but I bring it up to people somewhat frequently. I made you to what I turned seventy years old to shoot me in the back.

Of the head, and I said, yes I would, Yeah you did.

Okay, are you still willing to hold up that agreement if.

It's what you want? I mean, like, if if one you're seventy and you've changed your mind, I'm not going to hold you to it.

Yeah, no, but that's the thing. You can't let me know. It's like when I'm once, I turned seventy, you can touch basically when I'm sixty nine.

Okay, sexy?

Right, that's I was gonna say. Somewhere in the six days there should be a refresher, yes, because I don't know. I've watched my dad enjoy life from seventy to seventy five here, so you think.

I should push it a little?

Yeah?

Yeah, just you know, Yeah, my dad just had a seventy seventh birthday and he's he does have a marked limp and he is hard of hearing, but he's having a fun rhyme.

Right, wait till you have ass cancer or something and then call Karena?

Or how about if I may Readjust what if I just decide when it's going to be and it's not we don't pick the number.

You don't know the yeah week.

Just someday you'll kill me?

Yeah, what do you think of that?

That's it? I could go with that, yeah.

Right, because I think it's going to make you appreciate every moment.

I can't go for that, yeah, can.

I'm sorry, I just don't want to see it coming. Or maybe I do. Maybe it'll be fun to just my last moment is like, oh it's Karen. Oh my friend Karen.

That's right.

Or I dress up. I could dress up like a cowgirl, you know what I mean, where I have like guns on my hips and I'm walking up all slow and serious. We could do it. We could just seem it out. Yeah.

Fun. It's at a Halloween party, so I don't know what's going on, or it's.

Or I just do it by strangling you. So what we're talking and then I just slowly put my hand up to your neck and I won't let go.

And I have a big smile on my face.

Right, No matter what we do, this is going to be great.

Okay, you guys are starting to talk me into this. Are you in it?

You want to get in on them?

I want to service.

Karen offers let me kill.

You Halloween suicides.

It's called Killer k I L L y R and it's an app you can download.

First, we have to get me my nickname. Killy's going and then branding will work itself out. Speaking of which, how about this violent psychopathic van.

Oh he's been so troublesome at the show before truly, Oh, Yes, that's the guy. He's been awful.

Oh, that guy is crazy.

He's been awful. He's been He's uh, he's.

He calls himself the mayor of Echo Park. He's disruptive, he's got a big beard.

And everyone has to step on eggshells around him, and he like puts up with a ship. I told him.

I was like Dave was on stage when he walked out of the door one time, and Dave just made some comment because he looks wild, right, And Dave made some comment and he just stopped and started shouting at Dave. And I went there shouting at the whole audience.

I was there.

Wow.

I went up right after that. I went up right after that moment, and I talked about how I was going to get murdered.

I started. That was almost the fun I started to go. I went and stood next to him because he was being aggressive, so I was like, am I gonna have to Karen kill Gareth.

Your big chance? This is one of my favorite drives, just going up and down in a parking lot. Whe was not actually looking for a parking thing.

It's the only time you can really just go in circles slowly and have no one get upset with you.

Yeah, I like it.

But but this is your stop.

This is my start, and it's you have finished. You have completed giving me.

A rude Now is there anything else we need to talk about before you go?

Well? I'd love for people to watch my show Corporate. Jake Weisman is in it as well. Pat Bishop we created with him. He directed every episode. Yes, uh, parnon on Chair is in it. Annie do Deck is in it.

I was in the show with any Deck.

Oh yeah, what show.

It's a show called The Book Group that we shot in Scotland.

Oh cool, Yeah, this show was Jake. Oh yeah what Adam Lastick, Lance Reddick. Yes, it's really fucking cool and I think you should watch it.

Awesome, I love that I'm lastic is so funny.

Feel free to get it by whatever means necessary. I don't care if you illegally downloaded. Don't tell Viacom that I told you to do that.

When were you done? Because it's been a wild since you stop shooting it if not a full year, right.

We stopped shooting in February of this year, and I think that's right. Yeah, and then we edited and then it's we've been sitting on it for a minute. Yeah, and yeah, we're finally getting.

To put it. I'm so glad.

I know it's going to launch you into superstardom.

No, every and and from what I've seen, Matt McCarthy will be launched into superstardom everyone, all the regular It's great. I just watched the pilot, but I yea, it's uh, it's it's really good.

Well, I can't wait to see it. I'm jeny excited to see it. Yeah, thanks, Karen, because I loved women the sketches, those because pot Bishop directed those.

I directed those.

Yes, he's good.

He's very good. Pat Bishop is sort of like a robot genius type person. He's one of those people that Chris and I know you're one of these people too, where it's like you just start talking and hopefully I'll start saying something interesting by the time the sentence is over right at someone where if you like tell him something, you can see him like think about what he's going to say. Yes, so he like never says anything that is dumb or stupid, whereas I'm constantly stumbling over it.

No, that that's actually me.

You are the you are the king of that You've made that into your entire like comedic persona.

Yeah. Yeah, that's that's how I afford my lifestyle.

Life.

We are.

This boat. I'm about to get on.

No.

I loved him as the director of that show too, because he was like a sweet you know, he wasn't he's intimidating. Yeah, he was very zen. He was very nomas day. It was very downward done.

As he directed TV before.

Is that his first This is his first time directing TV. He directed a ton of stuff for Fun of Your Day. He edited with Bob and David and The Birthday Boys Awesome and some other stuff. So he's very talented. Ye, Jake and I are just where he's trying our best.

You guys are great.

I bet it's good.

Guys. Thanks so much for having me on.

For having you on, for coming on.

And guys, this has been welcome to my ride. I'm your host, Matt Ingebretsen. Yeah.

You did do most of the interviewing, which I appreciate.

It was really nice of you take it off.

Had that instinct. I like when I used to date a lot, I would just basically interview the other person the whole time, to the point where they would call it out like it feels like you're interviewing me, Like, oh, that's right, but the date is over. Goodbye.

How about you answer a fucking question for one?

That's the best?

Thanks? All right, thanks buddy, it's good to see you. We'll come in after this and watch some of your show.

All right, great, okay, Well.

That's it for us.

Yeah, I know, yeah, it's over.

Do we even Is there anything you want to say?

No?

Yeah, I don't want to say anything either.

We should.

I just wanted that guy to get out of the car.

Yeah, let's really talk about him.

I love him.

Dunk Oh wow, oh wow. I think he's so smelly. He was smelled great.

No, I think that show is going to be really good. And I didn't realize you were on it.

So just just an episode, I think, But so maybe I think just one.

That's going to go straight on. Yeah, well we got to update that reel.

Yeah we do. There's a couple of things I need to put on it too. And in both things I was in one Mississippi and this both are with that John Daily guy. Isn't that I showed up at the one other thing I acted in and it was the same dude.

Like with you. Yeah, yeah, he's so funny.

Hopefully I'll make it onto his demo reel. My is to be on as many demo reels as possible, not actually get jobs.

Yeah, just get demo reel jobs we'll have.

We're gonna our next episode. We're gonna We're gonna have a shirt.

Yes. Oh yeah, So a couple people have tweeted at us, yes, like please can I have one? Everyone's being so polite and so sweet. It's so hilarious. But just so everyone knows and people who are waiting and who have requested, we are going to do a special T shirt mailer episode and uh and then everyone will get their T shirt.

Yeah.

Yeah, well I've mailed most of them, but if you haven't got them yet, I only have mediums and largest at this point, but only a handful.

We got a request just today of a lady that would like a medium and she said, I'm asking nicely and I've listened for as long as I've known about it. Yes, yes, I do you see that?

Yeah, I did see it so hard. I'm we're going about it a different way where I already had them printed for that podcast festival. And then so I was like, well, email me your size and your address. But then I had to send them back an email with my Venmo and pay or PayPal, and then they would email back and say, okay, money's there. So then I look at my email and my PayPal and my Venmo and the people that gave me money. That's why I sent shirts.

Oh I didn't realize you, so thank you.

It was a lot and putting them in envelopes and going in a few times to the post office. But if you thought you ordered a shirt and it hasn't comments because I haven't gotten money, that's all.

Got it.

It was money and then mail got it, you know what I mean.

Yeah, it makes sense anyway. So that's yeah, okay, yeah, loving it.

I am too.

I love it.

Well, we're gonna honk in front of that guy. Yes, yeah, I want the sixteenth of You're in Missoula, Montana in December. I'm opening for Reggie Bots. I'll be a really fun show.

And then and then I'm in.

Portland on the twenty first to the twenty third.

At Helium importantly nice. That's a great Cloe two fun gigs. Yeah, that's so fun. Go see Chris Fairbanks do comedy and if you like him, try to date him because he's on bumble. But it's not working.

Oh it's not. I'm not I'm not ever going to meet him. I wish I didn't even mention that.

I want to mention it more. I think you and I we need to get out there. Yeah, yeah, you start mixing it up. We need to start very casually dating tons of people, just lots of meat.

Right, described myself in a lot of feelings.

Tons of coffees and really like superficial interaction.

I can't do it what you're describing.

I just can't do I'm the worst.

Oh god.

I just simply don't want to talk to anybody unless they don't seem to want to talk to me, and then I'm exactly that's exempt.

Wow, we have to talk more about that. There's one if someone doesn't like me back, Oh man.

No, that's the key, Oh god, Because well there's something about it where I can pretend to be casual up unto a point, right, but then if it's like but then if I get a little idea in my head and there's any even suggestion of rejection, it then becomes I missed interrpret heartbreak for for love? Right is I think my main problem?

Good God, I do that too. Yeah, I didn't know we have that in Colin. Good God.

We need to talk about important things more and stop bullshit.

When we end the podcast, we honk, But there's so many people in front of the car. I think we're just gonna have to not do it.

We're gonna have to not I'll do it. You do your thing and I'll provide the honk.

Okay, you've been listening to Do you need a ride? D y n A R?

That's pretty good?

Right?

I leave you want to way back?

Either way, we want to be there. Doesn't matter how much baggage you give us time and Turman engage.

We want to sendul Us stile Leanna, welcome you back home.

Tell us all about it.

We scared her? Was it fine?

Now?

Porn?

Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need

With Karen and Chris