Embarrassed at Work, Unhinged on LinkedIn

Have you ever shared your personal goals in a company shared document? Or maybe you've tried to prevent a previous co-worker from joining your current company. This episode of Demoted, we're reading your corporate confessions. And we're also reading some of Ross's LinkedIn recommendations. We'll also tell you...

why you shouldn't publicly trash your previous employer, even if they didn't treat you very well. Which is shocking for Ross to admit. Because boy, do I love a good crusade. We're bringing you all types of workplace embarrassment on this week's episode of Demoted. What's up, Motorheads? Welcome to episode 69 of Demoted. Hey, Motorheads. Ross was so pumped to hear that information that this is the 69th episode. And that's because he is, that's his humor.

That's his humor. I'm a simple man. Simple dude. Poopoo pee pee. Butts, boobs, 69, all the important stuff. And welcome back, Motorheads. It's good to see you guys. As you notice, we are remoted, but we're looking good. Natalie's wearing her pants all the way up to her shoulders. I'm wearing a set, and I put on a sweater, like a workout set, and I put on a sweater, and Ross didn't see. kind of the whole set aspect of it was like just curious like

Are your pants pulled up over your boobs? What's happening? What am I seeing right now? Because at first I just I saw your pants, the blue pants when you walked in the room and I didn't see it under your sweater there. All of a sudden I saw it. I was like, damn, you really pull those. I pulled them up so high. I just like hiked them up in the world. Could you possibly.

Be wearing a set that doesn't even make sense to me. I wear a set every single day. Do you know that about me? Like a workout set? Well, you always you dress really well and look good every day. So I just like it all goes together always. But I just thought like, damn, like she's really pushing the limits. No, I am. And then. I'm remoted. I actually look like a witch. I choose to be a witch. And that's just because I need one day off. I can't do my full glam. A still well put together witch.

who's wearing a set. She's a classy witch in a set. Should we just dive in hot to a corporate confession? Yes. This is what people want. This is why they come to the pod. We decided we're going to front load with the interesting stuff. And then we'll talk about ourselves at the end. Yes. and when you get to work, you can stop listening and we'll get our personal updates. Hi, Demoted. I've been a motorhead since day one.

I love the pod and all the practical advice you give. I will share a story that happened to me while working for a small educational startup and make sure to keep sentences short to help with reading. Now, this person said this. I should note there are three large paragraphs incoming. Okay. Three paragraphs loading. Here we go. Here we go.

As a small company, we relied mostly on a shared Google Drive where we kept all the important documents and decks. I love the OKRs methodology we used and decided to apply it to my personal life goals for that year as well. I decided to copy the PowerPoint we had used on our quarterly review meeting to my...

personal Google Drive and do the same type of review for my personal goals. I worked on it during the weekend and added comments onto every OKR with things like, quote, having dinner with grandma or being more understanding when my dad did XYZ.

On Monday, the chief of staff messaged me to ask if my team was still working on the OKRs for the past quarter as she had been receiving notifications from Google Drive over the weekend that the presentation was being edited. Turns out I had copied the company's OKR presentation onto my personal drive, but instead of working on that one...

I edited the company one. No more increased sales by 10% on our shared drive, but rather, quote, lose 10 pounds and, quote, stop being a control freak, complete with key results to measure each goal. Thankfully, this stayed between her and me. I sincerely hope. 10 out of 10 recommend using the OKR's methodology for your personal goals. Just make sure you save the file in the correct folder.

Okay, so I feel like this is something you would do. I feel like, you know, you're so type A, you and Annie are just like methodology, methodology, like rigor, rigor. you know, spreadsheet. Do you guys have this? Well, yes. I love a good methodology. I also love just like I use because I'm corporate Natalie and it's so.

closely tied to my identity and my work. Like, of course I have super personal things that just exist on this drive that I'm sure both Annie and Riley can see that do say things like invest in going on a date once a week. That's on mine too. Plan travel that isn't just for weddings. Yeah.

Yeah. Good luck for the next three years. So, yeah, for sure. I also love a good framework. Like, yeah, we just read this management book and I'm, of course, applying it to my personal life. I'm like, how can I apply these management skills to my relationship with my mom? Or how you.

You might manage your boyfriend, for example. Correct. Well, he manages me. So luckily, you know, he keeps me in check. I wouldn't know. There's I do no management in this house. You are just you're it's now there's two boys. It's three if you count Dex. Mom and two boys. Yeah, three. Which you count Dex as more of a brother slash human. Yeah. Yeah, that's my bestie right there. That's my boy.

That's my boy right there. Do you think she should be embarrassed about what occurred? Not really. Like, it'd be worse if the deck had disappeared altogether and she, you know, overwrote both of them with that type of stuff and then had to remake the deck.

You know, I would be if one of my employees was doing this, I'd be low key proud. It's also so humanizing, like be just be calmer with dad. Yeah, I know. He's just really stuck in his ways, you know, hollering at grandma a little bit more like. My favorite line. Can we say our favorite line of this together? It's got to be plummeted to the earth's core. My stomach plummeted to the earth's core because I felt it. I felt it with you. I was right there with you.

So funny. Yeah, I've been there. Not for this reason, but I've been there. But, you know, losing 10 pounds, stop being a control freak. I mean, I think we all relate. We all feel that all the time. We deeply feel that. So. I wouldn't feel so bad. I mean, that's a funny story. I do like I'm not quite this aggressive about it. I mean, Becca and I have quarterly goals. We do our quarterly meeting. We go to this.

Turkish place for breakfast and we had right out our quarterly goals. What went well? What didn't in the previous one? Did we hit? I love that. Are you going to do that this quarter with having kind of taken off? Yeah. I mean, we're actually overdue. We're supposed to do our quarterly this week. So. I mean, our goals are just a little different. You know, they're not as much revenue goals or like partnership goals. It's just like.

I don't know. He's still alive. So that's a plus. Like the kids, he's two months old. Yeah. His head size is the 99th percentile. His head is just the shape of a human brain, which concerns me every time he turns to the side. That does concern me. You know, his length is 96. His weight is like 94. And he's outgrown all of his newborn shit. So just save that in a little box for me. Yeah, that's what we're doing.

You have to save it. Putting everything off the side. It's all covered in poop and I'll just take it. No, it's I mean, we are we are running loads of laundry every day, every day, every day. Another load of laundry. I've never changed more laundry. I've never been more involved in the laundry game.

Do you talk about personal stuff and apologies if you reference this in your solo app, I'm forgetting, but do you talk about personal stuff during your quarterly check-ins? Yeah. I mean, we have like the business side and then we have the personal side. You know, it's very similar to what you said. It's like, are we doing the one date a week? Like, are we setting time apart? You know, are we communicating the way that we want to communicate?

you know, against the issues we had the previous quarter or whatever those may be. Usually it's me being a little bitch throwing a lot of tantrums. Yeah. It's really about me. Of course. Am I being a child this quarter or am I not? Or have I been a man? I don't know. I'm not clear. It fluctuates.

really does fluctuate for me. Do you have any embarrassing stories from work or being in the office that you can recall? I blacked out at a company happy hour or a team happy hour. I was thinking about like, of course, same. And it's been so embarrassing. Yeah, I mean, I guess long story short, we went to my team at Oracle. I guess there was probably 12 of us plus manager went to bar none RIP in San Francisco at like 3 p.m.

I don't know. Like we were, it was like a leave work early. We're going to go to a bar and do like a team outing. And we were working down in Redwood city. So we all drove back to the city where pretty much all of us live. And we went to bar none. And I hadn't really eaten that much.

that day. And, you know, we're doing our normal drink and we're playing beer pong because you could play beer pong and bar none back in the day. Right before we leave, someone's like Jager bombs. I'm like not a Jager bomb guy. And I'm also not someone who really blacks out, but we do them anyway. And I stumble into the car. Becca picks me up. She's also picking up a buddy of mine on my team. She's going to drop him off. And I remember like the car ride vaguely.

Like I actually remember where the lights shut off. We were going through an overpass and I like we went to the over under the overpass and I didn't come out the other side. No, I wake up at that like at four in the morning in my bed like. what's happening? How did I get here? I go out to the living room. There's Becca like on the couch of like an apartment I share with multiple dudes. I'm like, how did you get here? She's like, I picked you up. And I was like, ah.

I don't remember that. She's like, you've been in the bathroom all night throwing up. You even cried. And I was like, I cried. What did I cry about? She was like Well, you were like sobbing that, like, I shouldn't see you like this, that like, you're too good to me. And I was like, oh God, like.

I was like, I'm not a big, I don't cry that much, but that's a great, I mean, I'm so glad it was that babe. Yeah, me too. I'm glad it was that. And I was like, where's, where's my car? She's like, I don't know. You didn't know where your car was. It's somewhere in the Marina right now.

And I was like, I still have no idea where it is. I have no idea where it is. It's somewhere near bar none. Eventually got it. Yeah. I mean, eventually went and found it. It was like a block and a half away from bar none. Like we were just kind of like doing the squares.

Right, right, right, right, right, right, left, right, right, right, right, right, left. Just like just finding it. That is crazy. I miss those days. My friends don't really remember that. Like they were like, you were fine to me. The next day I was just like puking between meetings. This is like, I'm so sorry. I'm so embarrassed. I'm so embarrassed. It's all good, bro. Everyone's like, bro, it was sick.

They would send us to Deloitte University. I've mentioned on this podcast before this giant just there's a barn. There's a where it's like a huge hotel. Everything's paid for. Average age is what, like 20?

23 when i'm going 22 yeah because it's all just the you know new post-grad college kids which just is ripe for like come on and they say you know they watch you they make they check that your door closes they check that you go in alone they don't want you having parties in the rooms like of course I mean you're you're you forget that you're at work because you feel like you're at the sickest hotel you've ever been at right and there's like college but at a hotel

It's literally it's college at a hotel and everything's paid for. And then you go to the barn and you get your drink tickets and the partners show up at the barn and they start chatting with you and you wake up the next morning. You're like, what did I say to that partner? Oh, and now I have to go to a seminar.

please help me. So that was just the cycle, the vicious cycle of my post-grad. And I interned there too. So internship summer, I mean, I'm junior going into senior year of college. I am, I am not there to work. I am there to party and it's just.

You know, you look back, you're like, wow, sorry to anyone listening to this podcast who might have seen me at the barn at Deloitte University. They're still talking about it. I have another embarrassing story that's less drinking related. It involves wine. I was sitting down with less drinking related involves the wine, but which wait, we're, we're counting beer and wine. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Continue. Sorry. We're sitting at dinner. It's like me and my kind of.

mentor slash coach slash manager and then we have one of our clients coming we both worked at Deloitte at the time and This is like a really important client that we're trying to sign. I'm in my big girl trousers trying to act like I can provide some value to this business continuity discussion.

I know nothing. I just like send emails, make decks. I churn out work. I don't really know what I do at this company. I'm dead serious. And I go and we sit down and they're like, what do you what do you want to drink? I'm like, well, I love white wine. So I guess. I look at the waiter like deadpan dead cereal. I'll take a Pinot Noir. Oh, um, both men silent. So that's not going to be white me.

Of course it's not, which is why I said it as a joke. You stupid idiots. Yeah. Just Justin. Yeah. Literally. I'm like, I wanted to leave. It was horrible. And then 100% is it? So that's not going to be a white. And me, I go, I know that's what I want. Like, can't be wrong in that moment. I'm like, I changed my mind. I just didn't tell you guys. I like white, but what I'm saying is I want red. Like, is that hard to understand? And really just zoom in.

out what i'm saying is i don't know any wine at all i'm 22 years old i have no clue what's going on so that was that pinot grigio or what do you mean a pinot noir Pino, get out of my face. I don't know what I'm doing here. I don't know my name. So that's that's where we're at. Partners ever bring it up. I was at a Giants game last season and I saw a gal and she came up to me. I felt like I was looking in the mirror at myself.

seven years ago. And she was like, I know you're corporate Natalie. You know what I also know about you? I know that you worked at Deloitte and I'm on your team. Like I replaced you. I'm the entry level consultant on the business continuity team at Deloitte, San Francisco. I'm like, oh my God. And she's naming all these names of all the managers and partners. I'm like, he's still there. No way. We just had this total bonding moment. I'm like, let's go get a drink. I freaking love you, Grace.

It's not like the person who just sat at your table with a bunch of people and just like invited themselves to dinner. No, that was horrible. That's that's when that's when it crosses the line. I if I invite you, please come sit. But I was going to say, don't sit at the table if you're not invited.

No. That should go without saying. That should just go without saying. That's our favorite saying. It should go without saying. We love it goes without saying. Here's how to avoid embarrassment at the office. When you forget someone's name mid-conversation, just start calling them names like Champ or Rockstar indefinitely.

Next time you accidentally call your boss dad, just follow up with, oops, am I a bad girl? If you accidentally use a weird voice during a presentation, just commit to it for the entire fiscal quarter. That's actually us. Wait, when do you use what's like a weird voice you've used? You know, like when you're riffing on something, you know, like, well, what do we have here? We love using voices. My boyfriend recently said to me, he's like the one.

because I was like, you've gotten so much funnier. I feel like just in us dating, he's just molded into my humor. And he's like, yeah, but the one thing I just won't do are the voices. Yeah. All those weird British accents out of nowhere. Yeah. Yeah. Well, shame on me then. Sorry about that. Earl, I'm constantly just doing like gremlin man voice. Like, yeah. Oh, sorry for being such an ugly shrimp. Yeah, please. Yeah, exactly. Don't please stop. It happens when we bit.

And if you actually a little riff out, a little bit out. And we're always riffing. I don't know when Ross and I, maybe it was like 2019 when we had our last real conversation, would you say? Yeah. That hasn't had voices with weird intonation or some sort of like heinous joke. We'll say something really serious and like meaningful and then follow it up with unless unless unless you decide you don't want to do that. Yeah.

It really eases the tension. We're not really good. That's a genuine tip. Just just get out of it with a voice. OK, so anyway, commit to it for the entire fiscal quarter. If your stomach growls loudly, just like mimic the sound with your mouth and start beatboxing. If your phone rings loudly during a meeting, just pick it up and say the mission's been compromised.

And then leave the room dramatically. If you actually say I love you at the end of a work call, just divorce your spouse immediately and marry that coworker. If you show up drastically underdressed to a client meeting, just say you're testing their substance over style philosophy. Eyes up here. All right. Guys, I'm about to change your life. Just trying to be me for you guys. I'm casual. I'm casual, but I'm business.

If you spill coffee, just play it off with. And that's why they don't let me operate heavy machinery. When you realize you've been on mute for over five minutes on a call, just unmute and yell, director's cut, and then repeat everything that you meant to say, but with ridiculous hand gestures. Can you just define what director's cut means for the people who maybe haven't been on set? Yeah. For those who don't know, director's cut is when the director kind of.

puts together their own version of the film using all the pieces that they want to use. They're overwhelmingly longer than an editor who's trying to make it as tight and quick as possible. But a director has got like a six hour. Yeah, they're like, I love that scene. That's like that scene shouldn't.

been cut we got to have it so director's cut is just like the long ass version of the movie okay i need a what's good from you now that we've kind of we've broken the ice we've given what they wanted like how was your weekend i might have seen a linkedin post or two you might have seen me produce some some uh some linkedin cringe

I had a grand slam in my baseball game, and it was the first game that Fishy had attended. So it was his first baseball game. We had him dressed up in a little baseball uniform, and I had a grand slam. with him there. I actually had one of the best days in baseball I've ever had. And I'll say that because I was having a bad year. Ever like in your whole baseball career? In my whole life. You know, granted it wasn't like in a professional game or anything, but you know, went three for four.

I had seven RBIs. I scored four runs. I stole a base and I hit a grand slam. So yeah, Zaddy had a day. Yeah, that was Zaddy's Sunday. Yeah, that was my Sunday. So I made a LinkedIn post. Can I read your LinkedIn post? Sure. It's yeah.

Yeah, bring the cringe. I found out about this Grand Slam from a LinkedIn post that popped up on my feed yesterday. I'm going to read it for you here. By the way, the video is on my LinkedIn. If you want to see me hit a Grand Slam, if you don't believe it. The video also like is so made and produced by a man. There's an overlay that says.

ya boy with an arrow to Ross. It's cause I downloaded it on my IG story. Okay. So, and then it's Corp doing a grand salami today. That's the video that's on LinkedIn. Okay. I'm going to read the accompanying text yesterday. I did something that I've never done in my baseball career. Hit a grand slam. I know what you're thinking. Really, Corp? With those thighs? You're so cool and strong. I bet you've hit 20 of them. Yeah? No.

I was a pitcher for most of my career. But here's the real reason I'm posting this. I just had my first kiddo a month ago, and this was his first game ever. Baseball's a huge part of my life, even though I don't talk about it publicly too much. I've been playing with the same wood bat for 10 years. Basically, since I left independent minor league ball, it's an 18 plus adult league. And now at the ripe age of 36, I feel old. These kids, man.

This season, I started off in the tank. Perhaps it's that the average age is 10 to 15 years my junior. Or maybe I'm just more tired these days from raising a small screaming potato. I wondered if I'm washed up. Obviously, I am. Just love it too much to quit. Still, I'm not used to not dominating. Staring down the barrel of your athletic mortality is scary. Ask any athlete. The doubts had been creeping into my head.

But then my wife, Becca, stepped in. You need to hit midweek if you want to keep going. I'll go with you. So now we go to the batting cages once a week for 30 minutes. She feeds the ball in the machine. parentheses, four seam grip, of course. And boom, I get jammed by 78 mile per hour heaters. But yes, my four week old postpartum wife gets in the batting cage with me and I smoke baseballs back at her. We do this every week now while little man gets grandma time.

so good part of what made me so scared of having my kid was the fear that I would no longer be able to do the things that made me happy things like baseball I was worried that my life would no longer be mine and thanks to my wife her family and my family that hasn't been the case I feel so fortunate to have such a strong support system around me god knows i need it i'm a prima donna

But when I think about hitting that home run, I realize what made it so special wasn't the fact that it was worth four runs, though that was tight. It was because my support system was right there behind me, my wife and my son. I mean, literally. They shot the video above, but be it baseball or my weird slash wild career path. They've always been behind me. Boom. Oh, I love it. I mean, it's an interesting thing. And like.

Very well written, by the way. Just like stepping back. Loved reading that. I haven't read that. And as you could tell by my flubs, I had not read that yet. Well, it's like, you know, there's the bit and there's like these kids, man. Like, like I literally write with the voice, like a weird voice built in there, but it is hard. Like I think for me, baseball has been such a cornerstone of my entire life and I've always been very good at it. And as you.

continue to progress and get older like you just get worse and you you know everybody knows father time stays undefeated and you know it's trying to figure out what is next and for me it's probably golf like i do i do golf a lot but athletes all go through this and you're still very much in your prime. I think my athletic prime was like 28, I would say. Really? Oh my God, I'm 28. I don't feel that athletic. Physically, I think that was probably like.

the weird combination of like being a full grown adult, but like still young enough that I didn't have huge major injuries. Um, but it's just something that I think a lot about is the athletic mortality and like, it's what is next. Cause that's such a huge piece of your identity or at least.

your my identity but like any athlete's identity so it was cool to do that like I needed it badly I needed it so badly do you view this Grand Slam and maybe this is a probing question but do you view this as like a potential Nice end to this chapter or potentially like I sit there and keep saying if we win the championship, I will retire. And because.

You know, I've been playing on the same team for 10 plus years. Like there's a core of guys that I play with and have played with for a long time. And now we've got young guys on our team and it's fun to be, you know, the captain of the team and like, you know, get other guys sort of.

into it. And it's what I love about it is that all these guys are doing different, cool careers, whatever's, but, but we don't really talk about that. Like everybody there is just a ball player. They just know how to play baseball and they play it at a high level. And.

That's the best part about it. It's like showing up to the yard and playing baseball. And so Beck and I do go to the cage and we'll put a video up here. You'll see her. She goes like this and then she puts it in the feeder and the thing just launches at me. And I taught her how to put it in so the ball doesn't have weird spin.

You know, we do it every week and it's awesome. And that's like part of, you know, now we have a little date. I mean, obviously we go out to dinner and do all that stuff too, but it's, it's our own little like escape there. And she's, you know, she's like, Oh, was that a good one? I'm like, no, that one wasn't a good one. But it sounded so good. And just shout out to Becca, your wife, because if that was my date, oh my God. You would love it.

I would love it so much. Anyway, shout out to Becca. She's a real one. She holds his family down. And it was nice to do that in front of her because she's... That was the first time I tell her to film my at bat. She always films my at bats. The one other time I hit a home run with her at a game, she accidentally took a picture.

So I'm just like holding the bat. And then I hit a home run on that pitch. And so for years, I haven't let her live that down. I'm like, can you please just get one home run on camera? Like I hit one or two every year, max. Max, so you gotta be there like usually she's not at the game when it happens. So anyway, shout to Becca What's good with you? Well, my weekend was not as not as exciting Talk about your housewarming party at all. Yes, we could talk about my housewarming party so

My boyfriend and I were like, OK, we're going to have everyone over. And then we're like, wait, we actually don't really want them in the house. And this is 30 of your closest friends. 40 and it was simultaneously one of Matt's friends birthdays. So it was a birthday. It turned into a birthday party, less of a housewarming. By the way, I was invited. I just couldn't make it. I had other things.

I was invited. I just want to say I was going to, you know, they're expecting me to give you shit because I wasn't invited. I was invited. We decided to get a party bus and also rent out the back table at the bar Monroe's. Because why do a casual housewarming and then go to bars when you can get a party bus, have your 40 closest friends, and then get escorted by the bottle girls to the back of Monroe's and keep partying until the break of dawn.

That was incredible. Do they still do the decade music? I don't know. So what they used to do was like each hour. the music genre drink wasn't. Yeah. The cost would go up by each hour by a dollar. Yes. And the decade of music would go up by one. So like, well, so I went to Monroe's like, went like,

in the happy hour time on a Thursday when I was working in San Francisco. This Monroe's was so different because it was 12 when we arrived. It's completely packed. There's a line out the door. We get our wrist stamp. They're like escorting. It was crazy. It's a ranger. That's how I think of it. It was. an absolute ranger bar. And no song stays on for longer than seven and a half seconds, which is incredible. So right when you get into it, they're like,

Yeah, it's a party in the US. Drop that thump-da-dump. Hey, drop that thump-da-dump. Like they just keep switching it and I loved it. So that was my weekend. While you were hitting a grand slam, I was getting an IV because I was so hungover. You were getting an IV. That was great. You know, I respect it. You're getting into.

You're getting into. I am getting into it. This pod is about to be sponsored by NAD, much like Joe Higgins. We'll keep you posted. Please. Can we get into a segment we like to call this guy as a father where I view an old post from Ross's and.

We just talk about the fact that like, yeah, he's a dad now. I took a peek at this and this is not good. I'm going to open this. Yo, just looking for you. Cool. I'm going to run to the restroom first. Hey, corporate. Can you help me with something really quick, please? Sure. So does that all make sense? No, really? Oh, God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

I'm not responding to that. I'm not responding to that publicly. You sicken me. For what it's worth, I sicken me as well. What we just watched for the listeners who. I hope you don't have to hear it. I really hope you don't have to hear it. I'm just going to relay it so you don't have to hear it. It is a video of someone saying, we'll meet in the conference room soon. He goes, great. I'm going to quickly use the bathroom first.

And then a girl comes up and stops him right as he's about to walk in. It starts asking him questions. And then he proceeds to have explosive diarrhea in the conference room. Trash can. Have you seen Van Wilder? No. There's a scene where, like, they're dealing with these douchey frat guys and they spike them with laxatives. And the guy, like...

has explosive diarrhea into a trash can. Um, and you were like, I got to do something with that. That's inspirational. The audio from that is the audio directly ripped out of Van Wilder, the movie. Good. So, um, good. We're going to move on. We're going to, we're going to move on. I have nothing to say. I have nothing to say except I should probably go. I, if I were you would delete that. I would delete that right now in real time, but up to you. I don't know what she's friends are going to say.

I don't know what Fishy's friends are going to say. Hey, between the ages of eight and 14, they're going to think I'm the funniest guy in the world. And then they're going to grow up. And then I'm going to have to delete it. Why is your dad still doing this? Oh, he just remade that video. He's 60. Why is he doing this? Okay.

This one. And I love, by the way, getting to just kind of data mine through your old content because you've been in this so long. So I do feel blessed to get to pull up all these old anecdotes. The evolution is strange. The evolution is great. When we when this we're doing this podcast. 15 years from now hopefully we'll have some cringe stuff from me but unfortunately I started too I started too late you blew up too quick

Blew up too quick. You know, girl boss a little too close to the sun. But this we're going to get into some of your LinkedIn recommendations. And these are publicly available. You can see these on Ross's LinkedIn page. The evolution starts from 2012 and gets all the way to 2023. And we've mentioned that Ross gives LinkedIn recommendations, sometimes as a joke, sometimes seriously. Anything you want to say on the whole LinkedIn recommendations ecosystem?

I think they're a great opportunity to write hilarious stories. This one's in 2012 to Trisha, one of your first recommendations. And where were you in 2012? Can you set the scene for us? Yeah, 2012. Actually, it says March 24th, which is my birthday. 2012, I was a... Leasing agents. I was selling and leasing luxury apartments in Oakland, Oakland, a place called Domain by Alto, which is what is mentioned here. Right. This is like right during Occupy, Occupy Oakland.

And Trisha was one of my fellow leasing consultants. Let me first say working at Domain by Alta before Trisha arrived versus after was like night and day. She was an incredibly fast learner as I had very little time to formally train her. She was thrown into the fire immediately and responded like a true veteran. She picked everything up within a week. And before I knew it.

She had already found ways to not only help the rest of the team, but also enhance the overall experience for our residents. She is quick to smile and responds to adversity like a team captain. Her dedication and tenacity rub off. I cannot begin to say how thankful I am that she joined our team. People often forget how important attitude is in all facets of life. Trisha doesn't. The sky's the limit.

And that just, by the way, was like before your comedy career. That was like dead serious. Oh, that was dead serious. I love Trisha. I love Trisha. And she was a baller. And. You know, every now and then she's she DMs me from time to time. She's got a couple of kids. She's moved away. You know, we all grown up and grown out. Well, kind of. I haven't. But she has. Were you and Tricia like similar age? Yeah, I think she was like two years older than me, but I had started before her.

And I was the only leasing agent there at the time. And also you're dealing with like who lived there. You had no time to train her. You were busy. I had no time. I was busy. The guy who was there when I started got fired in the first week. So I got no train. I like.

You know, I was touring people around, doing deposits and leases and also people like, hey, the coffee machine's broken. Can you fix it? I'm like, well, no, but maintenance can. So maybe call them. But fine, I'll call maintenance for you. Have a wonderful day. Thank you so much. Yeah. OK.

Well, shout out Trisha. Hope you're doing well. And I'm going to get into this next one that was written 11 years later to carry. Okay. Any context on where you're at, Feb, Feb 2023? I don't know. I used to be afraid of the dark. That is, until Carrie came around. She is like a living beacon of light, filling even the darkest corners of our world with angelic rays. I remember going on vacation, parentheses, at Carrie's behest.

to an uncharted island somewhere off the coast of Aruba. Like any good tourist, I went on a cave tour, a three-mile trek into the depths of our earth, nothing but a headlamp and a dream. Our guide stopped us at a rock wall that was apparently over 3 million years old. There were writings on the wall. I couldn't tell if they were written by aliens or some of our earliest ancestors. But one thing was clear. It was images of Carrie.

It was literally her LinkedIn photo transcribed with dyes made from berries and squid ink. They knew. as do all of us now, just how important Carrie would be to billions of people around the globe. She transcended time and space, and I'm just so thankful to have been a witness. I've never met Carrie in person. Who is Carrie? I can't remember why I did that. You know what I do? I've been in those caves in Bermuda.

I went to Bermuda. God, I feel like I was right there with you. I just make these up and... I get little like stories in my head and I just write. This is my opportunity to do creative writing. It's so creatively written. Like I'm so impressed. They're very unhinged. They only get worse. It was Carrie the whole time.

In berries and squid ink. Yeah. That's what the natives had. That's all they had three million years ago. Like what else? What else were they using? It was her LinkedIn photo. Yes. So you don't know who Carrie is? No. Did you get like paid to do this? No, I can't remember what I was doing this for. I might've been like on the sad release or something. I was like anybody who, um, donates or something I'll give or likes or likes my post about sad.

Yeah, I'll pick like three random people or something. I can't remember what I can't remember what it was. Something like that. It had to be some sort of giveaway because you can't you just doing this for a random person is psychotic. It is psychotic, but I sometimes do that. I need you to read me this next one from similarly, same day, actually, Feb 2023. I was popping off. You were popping off. You were two edibles deep.

I want people to know these are pre-AI. So like I wrote this shit. Back in 2022, I was staying on a wildlife preserve in Eastern Africa. I was living off the land, digging holes for water and hunting fish with a trap I had built from reeds and bamboo. It was a morning like every other.

I made my three mile morning pilgrimage to the river where I would bathe. As I approached the river at my normal spot, I heard the bushes rustling. I didn't think too much of it because there were tons of weird sounds in the jungle. I proceeded to cover my body in mud as I always did.

But when I went to dunk my body underwater, I emerged to a terrifying sight. Yeah, a whole ass hippopotamus. And you may think, wow, how cool. But hippos are apex predators. And while I would describe myself as the same. Hunting business and hunting other animals are two very different things. The hippo charged me, clearly jealous of my strong traps and solid four-pack abs. I shielded my moneymaker, my face, waiting for the impending doom. But then...

A roar unlike anything I've ever heard. It was a lion. But not just a lion. It was a lion being ridden by Nikki. She screamed, Away with you, hippo! And within seconds, the hippo had retreated down the river. Still muddy and shaking, I cried out, Thanks, jungle princess. You saved me. She said nothing, just a knowing nod, and then she disappeared into the jungle. Thank you, Nikki, wherever you are. I shan't forget you.

I'm so impressed by your writing, one. And two, like, how do you think of these things? I don't know. I honestly. You're like, start in a tropical place. Yeah. Start there. Start in a place outside of Silicon Valley and then let's tie it back there at the end.

I mean, hunting business and hunting animals are two totally different things. I just, I'm only good at one of them. An apex predator like myself, parentheses, moneymaker, my face. So funny. So funny, Ross. And if you ever want to toss me a LinkedIn rack, like.

I am so open to it. Maybe we could do it for each other. That's what I'm saying. Let's do it for each other. I think we could do that. And we have to decide the parameters if they're just like completely unhinged or if we want to do them as like a roast. Or if we want to do like I can write something very ridiculous like this. OK, I think it should be. We'll take that offline. You know, there are certain things that we can't.

poke fun of with each other. Yes. As long as it's not that. Yeah. Okay. All right. Gosh, you were just so creative with these LinkedIn recommendations. It's almost like you might've.

taken a cornbread hemp gummy before just pumping these out. Could that have been the case? Well, I do keep these right next to my desk. So the answer is highly likely. Is that America's only USDA approved organic THC gummy? It is indeed the one-to-one ratio of THC to CBD.

Real THC, by the way, no synthetics, all right? So you're not gonna get those weird allergies that some gummies will give you. 100% legal hemp, which obviously we would never promote anything that wasn't legal. I take the CBD ones to kind of chill out after a long workday, quiet my-

my mind. Ross likes the one-to-one ratio ones. I do. I mean, look at the end of the day, alcohol does not have to be the default anymore. So if you are looking for a healthier way to relax and have a guilt-free good time, you got to try cornbreads THC. Gummies.

And hey, you might even pump out a creative LinkedIn rec after taking one. I'm just saying. Right now, demoted listeners can save 30% on their first order. Just head to cornbreadhemp.com slash demoted and use code demoted at checkout. Again, that is cornbread. Hemp.com slash demoted code demoted cornbread hemp. This is the good life. Woo.

Let's get into promoted or demoted. Promoted, demoted, making inappropriate jokes at an HR conference. Did you do this? No, but I'm speaking in an HR conference. Oh, that wasn't the Indeed thing. I feel this weird pressure when I'm on panels where like... You want to send people away with takeaways, but people just want me to make them laugh. Yes. So it's quite difficult. It's like, should I be smart, Natalie, who has something to say? Or should I be a clown? And I don't know.

but I think I should lean more towards jokes. I'm going to promote it. Yeah. I mean, I think you'll do just fine. I think you do just fine. Like you'll do your take on a panel together. Yeah. You made several jokes that people laughed at and you have plenty of takeaways.

I don't think you're. And I made several jokes that people didn't laugh at. And that was a good takeaway for me. So did I. And it was also hard to hear. There were 14 people there. There were 14 people there. Ross made a classic, just vulnerable joke. Yeah, it's been a really rough week. People died. Which landed. The crowd erupted. The crowd erupted. Leaning into your own suffering is funny to people. Promoter demoted airport dadding. And when is Fishy's first trip?

Fishy's going to Tahoe, so that's going to be a car trip. His first trip scheduled right now is September. We're going to Hawaii. Oh, my gosh. And hopefully he's... Still small enough to fit in a carry on or check on. Worst case, we'll check him in. We'll keep him under the plane. He should be good for five hours. He's been sleeping like six hours recently. So worst case, we'll check him. We'll put a bottle or something in there. We'll check him.

Yeah, that's my biggest fear. Here's my take. And I will wait till I have children to say this because who knows? I. I do not think I will sit in first class with my kids. I do think I would. I want to be in coach with children. I think that's completely reasonable and respectable and fair. I just don't think a Polaris seat is meant for an infant. No.

And that's just my principle. I don't know why I believe that. That's like my fear. So Fishy starts losing his mind. I hate making people feel uncomfortable. Yeah. I will go straight to the lavatory and I will sit there just like, please, please stop crying. Like I'll give you anything, anything.

Please. I will go sit in the lavatory. Okay, yeah. Airport dadding. I also think this was brought up because yesterday I was filming a bit for United before my conference, so I showed up to the airport in my wig and mustache, did that.

quickly transitioned in my conference outfit. It's just the whole thing. Classic. I mean, you're busy. One thing to the next airport switching like crazy. I'm going to promote airport dating. Yeah. I think it's hard to do. And those who do it, do it. Those who do it well, kudos. All right.

Promoted, demoted, forgetting someone's name. Demoted and I suck at names. It's so bad. I mean, I think I told you, I try to when people say, oh my God, like corporate bro, like I always try to ask their name. Well, I always say to.

which I recently learned like I'm Natalie don't assume they know because sometimes they just know you from oh yeah your content maybe they know you as the corporate girl a corporate guy you know whatever so I'm like I'm Natalie you're the corporate sales dude what's your name and then I try to re-say it too Yeah. And that's like, Hey, like nice to meet you, John or whatever. And I mean, then I forget like immediately, but like,

I try to like have them say it. And then I try to say it out loud. It's the only way I can get into my brain. And then at the very end, I try to say, nice to meet you, Shelly. Yeah. Call it back. But I've already forgotten at that point because I can't remember a name. It's hard. There's a lot of there's a lot of names out there.

There are a lot of names. So, I mean, I'm going to demote it because it sucks to do. I'm not trying to. It's just sometimes I lose it. Becca and I text each other names. Like we just went on a walk this morning. We met one of our neighbors. They're cool. They're like 35 year old couple, just like us.

You know, we're like, oh, we should hang out with them sometime. What are their names? Shit. We remember the dog's name, but then we got their names and we text each other. We text each other the dog name and then their names. So anytime we need to remember their names, we look it up. We're like, oh, that's rude. I have a note page that's things to remember that has like, when I last ordered my prescription, when I last watered my fiddle leaf fig.

Oh my God, our fiddlies are so dead. Our friends came over and were like, what the fuck did you do these things? We're like, ah. I don't know. I poured a glass of wine in there when we had our crazy party. When we had our adult party. Promoter demoted trypophobia. The fear of tightly clustered, irregular holes. You know what's like so weird? Tightly clustered, irregular holes? We've discussed this before that Talon...

Lives in our pocket and watches what we do every day. I was talking about this with my boyfriend the other day. You were talking about trypophobia. I was. Did you talk about on your story? No. How does he know that? I have no idea. And it makes me uncomfortable. It's deeply unsettling. Can I get some context of why you were talking about this? Well, we weren't talking about that. We were saying...

oh, is that trypophobia or is that like, is it the small fear of holes or is it a fear of crowds? And then we looked up. which talent obviously is logged into my G suite. He is the AI living in your G suite. No, he is. It's crazy. He, our producer guys, we're going to shout him out today. We don't have a shout out section, but we will, we'll, we'll take a moment to shout out.

Talon Gonzalez, our producer who goes through so much trash to give you guys the product that you hear or thank you for dealing with us. Thank you for helping us make these gorgeous outlines. Thank you for taking my random call on a random Tuesday when we talked for an hour last. week that was super fun I enjoyed talking to you

And I appreciate when he gives us light paddlings on our bottoms to keep us on track. We do get a light paddling. All right. Should we get into some deer demoted and then get people out of here? Deer demoted. I recently started a new job for a company which is preparing to do an IPO. In anticipation of the IPO, they are increasing their headcount.

in the accounting function, which is the area I've spent all of my career, primarily at the big four until about three years ago. Let's just say. I absolutely never want to be working with this person ever again. This person is mean and manipulative. Do I go to my boss and bring this up? Do I say something or do I just pray this person does not get the job? It's tough. It's tough because you don't want to put yourself in a position that makes you look less than.

Yeah, there is a possibility where squeaky wheel does not get the oil. And then they're like, wait, we really loved this person in the interview. And if they're manipulative, they probably crushed the first interviews. So you I would be. very careful with saying anything. What are your thoughts, Ross? It depends on the relationship with your boss. I totally agree. You got to be super careful with this because you don't want to come off as like, I don't know.

stirring drama, like, you know, who are they to judge was maybe, you know, their, your relationship with this person is as a result of you not saying that's the case, but as a third party objective observer, you don't know any details. You don't know the truth. Uh, so like.

I do think it's fair if, you know, your boss came up to you and was like, hey, I see you guys are connected to work together. What do you think of this person to give your kind of honest feedback? Oh, for sure. If you're asked, I think 100 percent. But I do think if this person joins your. your team and is gonna make your life living hell. I think you could bring it up with your boss if you have a good relationship and say like, look,

This person messaged me about kind of like being in interviews here. I just want to give you my experience. At the end of the day, it's your call. It's your choice. You should hire the best person. If you think he is the best person, bring him on. But this was my experience and I just want to let you know. However, it's a tough time. No problem. It's pre IPO. They recently joined. Right. You're only two. You're just like, you don't want to rock the boat. Right. So.

Be cautious if it's really important to you and you're like, I will not be happy here. Yeah. Say exactly. Do the Ross approach. But it's it's tricky. Like it could go either way. So dear demoted got fired recently, got a new job quickly. I'm clearly awesome.

Can I roast my previous boss and complicit HR person when announcing my new gig? Here's my thought. New job, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And a huge thank you to at douchebag boss and at complicit HR person for unexpectedly catapulting me out of my comfort zone to seek this incredible. It's hard. Ross and I are people with platforms that we could

do things like this every day to every person who ever wronged us. We could go on a ramp. And I think Ross and I will differ in our answer here because Ross has done it before. He's gone on crusades. I have. I love a crusade. And he loves a crusade and he feels fulfilled by that. I. think you just leave you don't let the door hit you on the way out you just blow them a kiss and just let them miss you that's how I approach life but Ross please give your advice that's the mature way

And that's the way you should probably do this here. No, my crusades are when it's more systemic and there's like, for example, LinkedIn laying off a bunch of people on the heels of their most impressive quarter ever. That feels bad to me. That feels that feels shitty to me on an individual basis. Like, look, sometimes companies, they hire people and then everything gets all fucked up. And like, there's always casualties.

this happens. And so I agree with Natalie, that is the right thing to do. You know, I don't think you'll look good to your own employer. If you say some snarky shit about your old employer, cause they're going to be like, Whoa, if something happens with us, like.

are they gonna go on this crusade against us for no reason? Like we're not trying to screw people over. Sometimes shit happens and like, especially nowadays. And if they like personally wronged you, I'm not above sending them a private message being like you,

Just, just, you know, some feedback from me, you handled this terribly. Like I, you know, I got a new job and I'm very happy and things worked out, but thanks for nothing. Like you can totally do things privately. I think the public LinkedIn announcement is tough. Because we've been publicly shamed by people and it does not feel good when your intentions are. At the end of the day, most people candidly don't give a shit.

you go out and crusade against them and it's like you against them. People are like, this is just like kind of weird. Like we're not, we have nothing to do with this. You know, if it's a large group of people that. you know, that are all getting laid off and, you know, there's like some others like injustice there, perhaps like, you know, yeah. When there's an injustice, I totally agree with team up and say something. If it's more personal, it just feels more.

It feels more catty. I feel it puts you in a worse light than you should be because as a motorhead, we know you're awesome. All right, folks, with that, let's read a quick Spotify comments. This one is from Nicole Taylor Senna. Congratulations, Ross and Becca. I'm not surprised she handled it like a champ. So happy for you too. I'm not surprised either. She's great. She's the best. She's the only reason I put on pants.

This is another one. This came into our email. Hi, Nellie and Ross. Great chat with Mariana Caravaglia. Thank you. And I got a bucket, got a bucket for less than a chain. I love being Nellie. We've got Ron and Nellie on the pod. Yeah. Ron, Ron is here with us and Nellie is also here and we're just happy to like be, you know, the face of the demoted podcast. Thank you guys. Yeah. Nellie, Ron, they're hilarious.

They're hilarious. I'm going to be a Ron one day. It's going to feel bad. I come off like a Ron. I feel like, all right. Um, as always send us your corporate confessions. If you have some embarrassing stories we mentioned at the top of the pod. Feel free to send those in contact at demotedpodcast.com. We also have a submission form on the website as well. Email us your shout outs. Text us if you have our number. Mom, I'm looking at you. Feel free to send us any any info, any inspo. We love it.

Yep. Leave a review on Apple. Embarrass that like button. Yeah, embarrass it. Embarrass the like button. Publicly humiliate the subscribe button while you're at it. Hit a grand slam in front of that subscribe button. Make it watch you. Yep. I mean, you could even give it a recommendation. if you're really into it. I would totally be aligned with you recommending the subscribe button to friends, family, everyone in between.

Yes. So like and comment on Spotify, YouTube, the works, say interesting posts wherever you can. Someone did that on my Grand Slam post and I appreciated it. So thank you, everyone. And as always, we will see you next time on Demoted.