You've Got Decisions: This White Guy Kept Me On Read?

not eat food. So he wasn't really happy with that and was like, I want you to get healthier habits. So whatever, I lost a wife. So we're on the couch watching Hunting Wives and I go get popcorn and raisin ets and I bring it back and I said do you want some? And he looked at me like no. It kept watching TV. I was like, oh, you want food or something? No, Kila, I don't need to eat right now, mind you. I know why he said it like that, because we just had sugarfish. I don't need

to eat right now. Really gives you need to eat right now? So I'm like, hold on, Stott falls the screen. I'm like what the fuck is that. It's like nothing, you feel judged. I'm not judging you. I said, how do you know I feel judge if you wasn't judging me, nigga. I was like, at the end of the day, we all know that I gained weight because the birth control is making me eat everything, and I was craving everything. But I'm not gonna be in this place with you

where I'm uncomfortable to eat a fucking snack. I fucking worked out this morning, Like I can't have popcorn now. He's like, you want to make the choices you want to make, but you basically feel like you need me to indulge, and I'm not gonna indulge with you. Every time you need to have a snack, I don't need to eat. We just ate. You want to have popcorn? Feel free? I was like, Nah, the way that you're talking to me is like you need to be this

accountability person for me. I don't need you to be accountable. I'm my own person. This is my body. He goes, that's my body too. We're talking about having a baby. We're gonna be together forever. Your body's my body. If I was sitting here chain smoking cigarettes and doing crazy shit. Wouldn't you be telling me don't put certain things in my body? And now I'm like, so I can't put

popcorn in my body. He's like, I'm not saying it's popcorn, but if you want to choose to eat late and do certain things, I'm gonna make sure to always hold you accountable when this is the stuff you said you don't want to do. So then we got into this thing of nigga. I don't need you to keep me accountable. Check the fuck up. He's like, I'm not gonna shut the fuck up when two months ago you were depressed

talking about, oh my god, I hate myself. No, I'm gonna make sure you stay on point because now you're in this place of loving yourself again. So that made me feel bad because I'm like, I always love myself. I've always been a bad bag teme when I little twenty pounds on it. So then we start arguing, We start arguing, We start arguing, and you know he's very quiet, is he not? Yes, I never heard this media very quiet. So he's sitting there and I'm eating the vopera and he goes,

you know what I think you want? I think you would like him. Man who just says yes, I think you want to yesk me? Oh I lost it. Don't tell me what type of nigga I need. Nigga? Who the fuck you need? Now you want to bitch who don't eat? That's what you want? Okay, go to one of my house and I don't need you to me what I need because I got you. So what the fuck you gonna do? Fuck you? So now I'm mad. So now I get up. And now you know when they start laughing when you get mad, and that's that

really puts me off. So that's what I do. You already know that's my ship. I'm like, oh you about to I'm about to whoop his ass. So I go in the kitchen, I start washing dishes. I'm doing something else and he gets in the cabinet. Now he's going through the cabinet. Now there's vitamins and shit in there, advil whatever in some of my stuff. And he said, I said, what do you want. I'm just looking for those pills that you need to calm you down. Whoa,

I just fighting words. Whoa, that's crazy, I said, excuse me, Yeah, that's that's what I need. I don't know what it's called, because you know, xanax is also like stuff anyway, So I wanted to get mad, but then I started laughing because I was like, oh, you really think he funny? I start laughing. He started laughing. Now you're going to ca I go sit on the couch. Offcorn's still there and his boxers are on his legs open, so I see the tip of the dick. So I was like, okay,

let me suck it, let's make up. I put my hand towards this dick. He goes, I'm good. Actually, what you you fucking ho nigga? We fuck all the time, four times a day, and he's out the house, and now you don't want to go pussy, I say, so now you don't want to fuck me? He said. I just realized we are in this relationship because I've changed my eating habits for you. I was vegan, I didn't even red meat. I never ate this fry shit all the time, and so basically, if I never changed that,

we wouldn't be together. So now I'm trying to go back into healthy shit and you won't let me. So what the fuck? I'm like, Okay, So now you want to tell me you want to go be with a bitch who being a go be the bigger badge ass. So now I'm mad. He's like, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying that I've changed something for you, and you don't want to change anything. To change anything, I didn't eat fucking popcorn, you don't need to eat it.

He's like, that's not true. If I started this relationship and I was actually raw plant based vegan like I was, we would never be together because of the way you like to eat. I'm just telling you I've made changes. I'm like, so basically telling me I need to change. So I'm like, you know what, you're kissing me off. So Gila's husband because it was his birthday that night going to the strip club. So I hit the group chat with all four of us. I'm like, hey, we're

all going to go off drinks. That was the hour when he was a fighting. I was like, let's go to Davala. He's like, I'm going with the boys. So he used to asking Mammy, oh you want to come. I was like, you know what, because we don't argue and kick each other out or do any of that. I was like, I think you should go to the strip club with nag go I have a good time, so we could have a little space. Now, I was flying to LA the next day because this is only

a few days ago. So he started getting dressed and then I got out the shower and I was like, I can't believe you. What is wrong with everything? Ruh? I could it's crazy. I want you to go, but I also just feel like I'm mad because we were supposed to have a fucking date night. But you ain't shit, brun, You're crazy. I know this is every story. Wait crazy, So now you're looking at me. I'm not saying that

you shouldn't go to strip club. It's just said I wanted to go out, and I'm like, really mad because this is all a bullshit fight and now you're going to strip club. Well, I'm gonna get at home reading a fucking book. So he's looking at me like I don't know what to do. So I called for yall to choose out one her gay friends. I'm like, where are you at. She's like, oh, now, we're just rent the house. I'm like, let's go out, and the like we're in bad right now. Hang up on his bitch,

I get my book. I'm sitting near with Nina. Now this nigga getting up and he's putting on his good little fit too, the fucking tabbies and shit and his little fucking shit fuck you. So he comes over to give me a kiss and I'm like, oh whatever. So he's gone for thirty minutes. They won't text each other. I love you. I'm like, all right, we're gonna make it. He comes home and it wasn't lately, but whatever time it was, he won a fuck and I'm just like, no,

runna fight and sleep nigga. You whoa? So then brouh. When I heard this the first time, I was just like, you know what, I can't even say that. That's why I'm not saying nothing now. I'm gonna let the audience make all the faces warm. But bro, what what you dead ass? I was not supposed to suck him at five in the morning when I was sleeping. Nigga. All the ship leading up to that is.

in a good place. Now I can see where. I don't want you to be depressed because you feel overweighted. That of course is why he's doing that, and I understand that, but I can't get to a place where I start hiding through from you feeling judged and feeling like shit.

like Bro, I'm working out a lot, a lot. I'm really trying my best to not only maintain the weight, but cut up like I've never taken creatine and macros did all this shit counted things before I got a food scale. One would think it's cut for cocaine. It's not. It's for food in my house, and you can got You've got to understand what it's like because you were

dating a vegan and she changed. So imagine if it's like you started looking at her different and she started looking at you like it doesn't feel good.

stories and bonus content you won't hear anywhere else. And now here's You've Got Decisions if you would like to have us answer your questions. If you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or a terrible throufle guess what, You've got decisions? You've got decisions. But y'all, it's a humpday. This is our You Got Decision is our segment that we've made an episode for you. Every single week we

answer one of your questions you send to us. If you want to get your question prioritized, you got to DM it to us on Patreon, Patreon dot com Backslash Horrible Decisions where the show never died, or you can also send us your email at Decisions pod at gmail dot com. Now we're gonna get right into it this

week because we're not gonna hold you too long. This actually comes from a Patreon member who writes in oh lord, hey girlies, I'll keep this as short as I can, but you both have helped me in my journey into my womanhood as I approach twenty four years old. Before I dropped my question, i'd appreciate any general advice you'd give to someone my age. I also love advice from the both of you. Okay. I met this guy as

a server at a celebrity chef restaurant in DC. I'm a black woman from Miami, big as fuck, and the best way I could describe him is as a skinny but cultured white guy. Long story short. We hung out after his shift and he gave me submissive vibes. When I gave him my number, he told me to Apple pay myself whatever I wanted, and the convo after was so flirty, and he's really funny. I've never fucked a white guy or honestly had anything other than vanilla sex

and toys. However, I know that I'm kink here, I let on and all I would need is a man to make me feel safe enough to explore that. Naturally, I'm more of a sub, but he gave me he wanted to be my sub yo, bitch. He was saying things like whatever I call him, he or respond I'm his queen, etc. Anyways, that was literally all twenty four hours of our encounter, and I want to follow up. He didn't text me the next day, so I want to reach out because I want to explore this more.

How should I proceed even if he isn't a sub? Not gonna lie? I want to fuck him, but I've never been so forward before. Any advice is helpful. I feel like Mandy's looking at me because he's white, and I don't know what's to say. However, when I go like, that's why she think he has sub because I think white man give me sub all the time. Because I ain't never been with a white man. To me, I always feel like I could just rough up a white man.

Sometimes I feel like also white guys are a little bit more trepidationous, like when they meet a black woman because they're like, who are you into me? Or you're not? So then you think such energy because it's not very dominant but hmm, by the way, fuck you for saying that he gave you his Apple pay and told you to Apple pay yourself whatever, and you ain't tell us how much you Apple paid yourself because that would let me know what you think of yourself. Because I'm also

that's what makes me think. Okay said she's trying to come to him with like this, how much it's going to be the sub bois out because the Apple pay comment is throwing me. It's not given me that she wants to sex work because she said he didn't hit me the next day, but not gonna lie. I still want to fuck him, So it's not giving that she wants to charge at all or make it any type of thing. I think she said that to allude to his submissiveness. So whenever I haven't gotten a text back,

I'm not gonna find it works every single time. I've never been rejected by this, but it's not necessarily something I would always recommend. But I like to be a little fake dramatic. I'll say things like, waiting by the phone for you to text me has been really annoying, blah blah blah blah blah, and then I'll send a cute picture of me looking sad, and then they always have to reply because here's the thing, niggas forget you fine,

but all the time. One of my homeboys told me he gets so many numbers that sometimes he has to write in the notes like what they had on so he remembered the bitch. Oh yeah, Oh. I had to my boyfriend. I had to change my name in his phone. He had Mandy light skin. I said, I don't like this name, and I said, and how many mandy do you have? Oh? None? So then I should be able to stand alone you putting Mandy light skin in cart egg. Bro. I made him change an egg on and off for

years that I talked about on the show. Bitch. My name was Gigi blue in his phone, and I said, what he's like? The day I met you, you was wearing a blue wade the suit at Soho House ages when your name was I was like, Bro, Mandy light skin is great, glue is worse. No, it's not. Why

are you fucking talking about my skin color? I felt away, and you couldn't have put Let's take us pretty smile blind like Nigga light skin is so Gennaire octrog Gila podcast once Bruh, I'm sorry, light skin is generic as fuck, and I felt like he didn't really know no meat very well. Well, here's the thing for the text. If you want to fuck, you gotta start off gate the flirt. The first's gotta be whether it be the emoji. The emoji's gotta have the tongue. It's gotta be a you

gotta get emoji. It's gotta be something that happened that night. If you're trying to lean into like the sexual energy, you gotta bring the sexual energy because for the most part, men are pretty much gonna try to be respectful because they all scared to getting me food right now. So it's the gift. It's the photo of you, it's a sexy moment from that night, or even saying something like bringing you back. I can't think of what you wrote

because I'm really hungry when my brain's broken. But whatever he was saying to you that night, be like remember when you x y Z. How come we haven't followed up on that? I'm ready. Yeah, things like that that it's so hard for it, and I think that that's the that's actually the first part you said that you're normally sub leaning into dominance looks like you taking that first sep then like in the most subtle way. I think women often look at being submissive as being the

one that is getting chased. And in this essence, if he didn't hit you back and bitch, if you want that dick and you want that little pink, you gotta go get it. And what that looked like is you hitting him up and being like, hey, so where's your next day off? Because I'm trying to see you where you're taking me. I think that's what you should also lean into. Don't be too dominant to where it seemed like you're trying to take him out. If he don't

already lead with like apple, pay lean into that. That might be a part of his kick. He might be he might want to be financially dominated. Something so good. A piece of advice that you just gave I was thinking about it when you were talking, is you said, don't be too dominant. So now it is like, don't be too dominant, don't be too much. You did no, no, I know, I said in terms of if you think

he is a sub I didn't say that. I said you got to lean into the dominance and what I'm saying is to make sure that and that's why I was leaning into the findom of it. If he pulled out the Apple pay, what I was going to say was that you should tell him when are you taking me out? I'd like to go here? Don't be like, don't ask him to go out, Like I was going

to lean into being full fledged dominant. If you want to be dominant now outside of taking him out, be like, so when you're taking me out, I'm free this day? Are you taking me out here? It's a better thing to start off with. When I heard you saying don't be too something, I was going to say, don't be

too forthcoming more than you want to be braddy. Think of the word braddy as your guys for how you'll start off with being dominant, because if you're not naturally that bitch, it can come off kind of weird, or you'll go too hard, or it just won't feel natural. Definitely be bratty girl. Braddy is a part of dominating, and you can amp it up once he gives it back to you. So maybe like she really don't know how to start, so I would definitely start off with one.

The text got to be annoyed with him in some way but sexually flirting, annoyed that he hasn't hit you, annoyed that he didn't follow up on something from that date. Also, like Mandy said, recommending, you need to be telling me x y Z where we're going. It's been forty eight hours, like amp up and flirting with the brattiness. I haven't had a man yet that doesn't like my little brad shit. But that's only when men are super attracted to you, and it's very clear, Yeah, you know you can't just

be it, So I wouldn't lead someone. I'm fine with being a bride wants you get to know someone like My advice would not be to be a bread out the gate, which is why I'm like, just be dominant and forthcoming, like when you're taking me out, when am I seeing you like and not making it seem like you're asking him out, like, oh my god, I can't. Like, I would just be dominant in that way. Brady to me always comes later. I don't get to show my

bridy ways, like even my main nigga. Now, it took me four years to be able to be a bread with him to where I felt comfortable that it would result in what I wanted from him. I guess bratt looks different to us, so to be brat looks different for niggas like to me Brady, especially in an era where all these niggas complain about a bitch asking for

too much to saying that. I think being dominant and being too demanding can look different to men too, So I guess that's why we have two different opinions on that. I think, Yeah, so there you go. You got two different options ago. You could be a brat or you could be the dom that you want to be with the sub or you could be the dom brat, which, how the dog hasn't worked for me. That's more subby so to me, I guess that's why I'm leaning on her being stronger because she said he gave off sub vibes.

I honestly think too before leading into all this BDS some terms which a lot of people I guess like to do. Now, you really don't notice, nigga. You literally said you met him at a restaurant. You don't know him, you don't know how he's in the bedroom, you don't know technically how he wants to show up. In any sort of relationship. So honestly, I would just lead with the Hey, it was really nice meeting you the other night. I don't want us to be strangers, so don't be

a stranger. When can I see you again? Leave out the BDSM topics and conversations altogether. I know we led very sexually, and again I think that those are things that unless you're meeting someone in the lifestyle on the scene or have a rapport with them, some of these things could be like off puttish. So then I would just say not taking a step into BDSM out the gate.

Second time you got damn textas nigga literally just not a nigga because he white, but literally just express that you're interested, you really liked his energy and you want to see him again. How soon can you see him again? That removes you being too dominant, It removes the brightness of it, and you coming off is all the things that men are also sharing that they don't like at

the moment. So I would say, for anyone listening at twenty four years old, if you aren't really sure the space that you're in in terms of BDSM, it could be tricky to lean into or look at every relationship dynamic in a BDSM way without really knowing how confident you are and where you stand and the B, the D, the S and the M. That would be like my full fledged advice to also, considering that you're twenty four and you think you're a sub never been a dom,

that would be my advice to you overall, and then you can lean into the other things that Weezye and I said later on once you actually continue seeing this Nigga, yes, breaking that first text ice, it's tough. The other day we were at a table actually it was that same Fashion Week table where I was bitching about obey. My homeboy was like, yo, we ran into someone and he was like, damn. I was like one of my top

top three. I was like, nigga, you said that was gonna go top three dubs your top Like, who the fuck is one and two? He's like, all right, maybe she was, And I'm like, so what are you gonna do? How do you like, hit her up? You're in the same city, you both don't live here. He lives in London, Like hit this bitch up? So he's like, how do I do this? So we're now all going around the table because their last interaction wasn't necessarily the best. Okay,

He's like, where do I go from here? And I'm like, in my head, you gotta go basic. It was good seeing you even on my mind. That's basic. Next person's like, say, thinking the last time I missed that pussy that don't work, prompt that don't work, that don't work. Good seeing you again with the heart works, And I'll tell you why

period don't. I don't want a nigga depending on for him to go straight to I missed that pussy or I miss how that fee and all these niggas that are getting it now due to nigga, like make me feel as a woman missed because of my presence, not because of my pussy mind from my mouth. I know already, I know, I know now. What else you should know is that there is more content from you, and you

can also see this on video. All you have to do is go to patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions to get the t to get the views, to see how cute we are, and to send in your question to us, and we're going to give it to you straight. Include a picture too. I want to see what you look like. And thank you guys so much for tuning in too. Yet another episode you got to say us ho Hi, see you next week. I'm Dave. Bye,