If you would like to have us answer your questions.
If you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or a terrible throuffle, guess what You've got decisions, You've Got Decisions. Welcome you on to another episode of You've Got Decisions on this motherfucker Hunt Day. I'm joined by a very special guest to help give you bitches some advice.
Y'all.
Have one third of the friends on with me and one of my very good best friends.
A Sante.
This motherfucker okay, period period period, to help me out. If you guys want to send in your questions, make sure you send them holes into Decisions pod at gmail dot com.
Before we get started with this.
Week, as always, I'm going to read a lovely review about our book, our New York Times bestselling book, No Holds Barred, a dual manifesto of sexual exploration and power. This this one comes from Lenny, who writed us five stars over on Amazon. Pre ordered as a loyal twenty seventeen or Hive member. I've been following Mandy and Weezi
four years now. Reading their book just solidified how far these two ladies have come along in their journeys the stories inside this book make them feel even more personable than how they already work. If you haven't joined the Patreon, I also highly recommend Bitch Me Too. They share a lot of themselves with their fans there as well. Love you guys, and continue educating the people through.
Real and raw experiences.
Yes, now, clearly I kidnap Assante for a little bit.
So if y'all want to hear.
Me talk about my recent experience with the new nigga in my life, go on over to patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions because we're still horrible for this very special edition. If you got decisions, I'm gonna blend Mandy on.
The holland Mandy on the high Line. I'm talking yeah.
And y'all know Ida meant one fourth of pretty Ricky Son now.
I wish I could say for real.
Sorry, okay, And speaking of Bandy on the hotline, I'm just gonna play a voicemail from someone who loves Bandy on the hotline. By the way, if you want to leave a voicemail, you can call ninety seven three nine three two zero two two seven and leave a voicemail like this one.
Hey, uh, Mandie on the hotline one of your listeners. I'm actually driving on my way to work right now. I didn't really have a question head on that I could think of, but I'm a huge fan of the show.
I just pre ordered the audio play, and I hope you guys keep doing what y'all doing.
I enjoy selective ignorance, and I enjoy everything both of you guys put out as a collective. But yeah, maybe i'll call back with some advice if I can speak on it a little later down the line. But I appreciate trying to keep doing what y'all doing.
We appreciate you.
Now, what is that kind of slow slow gym ship? Is that? That was a little dirt that was vanish mom? No, because I was on Instagram and it was a song that was on my status for whatever reason because I had listened to them. A little dirt, what's wrong? A little dirt? Nothing we'll do. We won't do a little dirt. You know, it's crazy.
I didn't peg you as at you as a as a little Dirk fan.
Look that list, the list of people you peg. I know, it's immaculous. That's crazy. Unfortunately, unfortunately I am not listen listen, No, it was Dirk. Apparently he's fine or something. Was it a little Dirk or apparently it's fine.
Is it a little Dirk in jail?
It's it's a clone.
It's got to be a clone.
It's because I used to see that his little his little leather shorts and.
He couldn't dress for ship. It needs to be a conversation about that for real, because they find out like Gucci came back looking real good, Gunna been like fitness and.
Said it, let's send everybody to jail. Then when they come out, baby, that's okay.
That's no, no, no, let's let's not crap. Let's not we're voted for now.
No.
Clean out.
Wrong, But there is like whatever workouts they do in jail.
You know, don't get me wrong. This is gonna sound terrible, but I always said to myself, I just sounded terrible. Okay, Well, I always say if I got locked up, then I wouldn't have nothing to do but to work out, like you know what you well, that's I want to say that he do that say he was in jail, he said he had the best time of his Like, whoa, there's this gay man he was he's about say, I don't know his fucking name. You go here, tell you're.
The only fans nigga who's now like you?
You he is the only fan See okay, here's the only bed now.
He makes all this jail content bending over strike niggas in himself.
There's something wrong with him because there's been like things happening to him on Twitter. He's like, he looks like he's mentally like something might be going on with him in jail.
That's a tough environment.
It's so imagine being and he's trying to be a content creator behind bars too. So like what, I.
Don't subscribe, but I watched the free stuff on Twitter.
It's kind of good. I've seen some things. Yes, all right, anyway, get back to it.
We have a question from Shape from Houston, and Asante helped me with this question.
Hey, this is straight from Houston, Texas. I just call him love for Boysnail. But I'm gonna leave another one to make it a little shorter. I have a homegirl that me and her had a threesome with somebody in my apartments for my birthday as a birthday gift. Since that time, like us, three have consistently hung out with each other, spent days with each other, you know, at each other's apartments, her apartment, in my apartment, his apartment.
We've been on separate dates and things like that. We've been on a couple of days. Like everything seems to be real cool and it's very uh, situationship ish, But I kind of want to bring up the topic of us actually being in a poly relationship or being in some type of thrupple. And I'm not really sure how to approach a conversation, particularly with Ken. His name is Ken, her name is Drea, And I was just looking for advice on what you guys think God should do as
far as like approaching that conversation. And my reason that is Keen is because you know, he comes off as like a man's man, and I just don't want to turn him off from from him, Like I don't want to like, oh, you know, now, I gotta be something extra than what it is. I really don't want anything to change. I just want to get those times understood. Anyway, any advice you guys could get it would be great.
Thanks. First off, shout out to you and your home girl.
Okay, you other three songs for your birthday.
It's like, oh, but you did that. Yeah, I like that.
That's amazing, And clearly y'all have brought some nigga in that both for y'all were pleased by it because y'all both hanging out with him together separately, y'all are all doing this?
How do you you know? Well, first of all, congratulations, some of us can't stumble into one good situationship, let alone a double like a like a full of poly situationship is crazy. So I feel like everything's already there. You know what I'm saying. You're just trying to clarify or get the terms understood. You said you don't want things to change, they would if you're going through this conversation. Look, if you have the conversation, things are changing, you know. Yeah.
If y'all just gonna keep doing what y'all doing, then you know, y'all gonna keep doing what y'all doing. But there is something to be said about wanting more and maybe trying to potentially see where that can go. So I feel like if you want to have the conversation down with both of them and just be real, like, remind everybody of all the good things that are happening and see if they want more of it now.
If y'all listen on Patreon, I thought that I could continue being friends with activate after we broke up, And so for me, my initial mind goes to how closer friends are you and this homegirl? Because once you introduce a romantic relationship into this, and when I say romantic,
I'm talking about clearly the being together. Yeah, because y'all know I fucked my friends and it doesn't change the dynamic of it, right, But getting into a romantic relationship with someone where now you have to show up as a partner, we'll change the dynamic of the relationship that you have with her. And so for me, I think I would sit with first, would I be willing to
lose this friendship because now I want more? And a lot of times where you think you can maintain friendships with someone have to romantic relationships, apparently you can't try.
But she seemed more concerned with the guy.
So the reason here's my thing about the guy.
She she brings him up as like a malely man, and so for me, I think her concern is maybe he's a whole ass nigga, And so how she even described it, where she's like, I just don't know if he's going to be into doing all that.
For me, I felt like he's not.
The one that maybe wants to be tied down.
I kind of took it. I took it to maybe she didn't know she freaked him out with like like maybe he thinks, well a title, but like you know, maybe he's he's like fucking with the one girl her, but like it might be weird for him to be like you want to be poly now, girl, Like that's like that's your friend, and like, yeah, we had threesomes and again, I don't know my feeling right here is happenings.
I mean, I mean that's the thing too. We don't know how old she is. To me, I actually kind of agree with what you're saying. We have been talking on this podcast about non monogamy and all these lifestyle.
Ways of dating because some niggas ain't in all that.
And ain' not they'd rather just cheat on you.
Right, So you brought that up to it, like that's a good point, like her, but you aren't trying to be in other threesome. I'm gonna just keep doing this shit over here. Because it's freaky, but like, I'm not trying to be in a three right relationship, so it could go either way. I him not want to be in it, But what I would say is have a conversation with him, because I feel like you want to
talk to him about it first. If you feel secure in your friendship with your homegirl that y'all could like forego that for a poly relationship, then cool, kudos to you.
But if you're trying to figure out how you're going to approach the topic of being in a poly relationship with him, really see where he's at with the relationship with you first, and how he would feel about integrating another person into that, or what his true feelings are about your friendship and what that would mean as far as y'all being more than friends now and like how like and even for you and your friend, y'all would need to have a conversation about that. Like, so I agree with that.
I think you had to have separate conversations with individually before bringing.
It, Separate conversations about where you're at with them, where they're at with themselves, and how they feel about everything that's been going on together.
Because also this just rooted from a goddamn threesome. Yeah, are they dating other people?
Right? What are what are.
Their interactions sexually and romantic feat outside of this little.
Tree right because it might be like we're having the threesome. That's fun. But then like, oh now it's Wednesday and I'm on a day with a nigga and I'm a fuck him tonight instead. But I'm gonna see these bitches on Friday Saturday. So I did three someme I'm looking forward to. But yeah, if they're spending time together and maybe accidentally grocery shopping all three of them now, and it's like possible split three ways.
Because it looked like they got three apartments.
Bitch.
If y'all all just want to save some money, honey, in this economy and.
Starting dollars, I might need a bill split two. I haven't missed peace.
I agree with with with where you're at.
I think you should talk to them individually, see where they're at, especially outside of each other or outside of you, and then consider with your friend if you you'd be willing to you know, potentially ruin that friendship because you want something more.
Because they actually have already crossed the line they having these, they're in like a poly situationship. So now she's been trying to figure out what like.
So that's the other dynamic. First off, you're not in a poly relationship if.
You just hang out and polly situationship. I think that that's the thing too.
I think when we start attaching Polly to things, Polly is an umbrella term, and there's so many ways a lot of formation to have that dynamic. And so you guys have to talk about if it's going to be closed, if it's gonna be like even.
Before you bring in a relationship, but I get to date other people, or like are we dating?
Do we get all other people and date other people?
So for me too, I would want you to do a deep dive on all of the different ways Polly can be exper And then if you're coming with them with this idea, you need to know your boundaries and what really you're comfortable with, you.
Know what I mean? Yep, So to me, it looks like it looks like that, Yeah, looks like that. Yeah. For me, I would.
Want you to sit with realistically your own feelings, your own boundaries, and before you be like, let's be in a poly relationship. You need to go down all the different poly relationships and figure out what would even truly work.
Right and honestly reflect some deep reflection. Are you ready for a relationship with two people? Like if you're thinking about like could this be more? But you say you want to keep things where they're at. If you want to keep things where they're at, then you might not want to say anything curious, but if you want more
from it. So I really had that conversation with yourself before you step into how you can to have it with both of them, you know, either separated together, because you could just you know, keep them together and just be like, so, what do we all doing? How we all feeling? Because some people like to do it like that, but I'm the type I want to see what we do separately, you know, figure out where you're at, to see if I can align the hearts and heads together.
I think that's the thing too, when you talk about wanting to be in a relationship as an adult, especially Polly, when especially including two or more people, what are the things that they have going on?
Are they coparents? Like somebody like somebody has to know how the formula is being put together. Sometimes there's the two that come in for the one, but sometimes there's the one bringing the two or three or whatever together. But you have to somebody that has to have the knowledge of how.
These That's the thing I just brought up, doing any of them co parent because maybe now both y'all gotta deal with both.
Y'all got to deal with the parent. What if thebody wants kids and somebody don't.
Now were going down the rabbit, But yes, of all of those things you actually have to consider before getting into a relationship. And so if the sex is fun and y'all just like hanging out, the pressure of a relationship doesn't.
Have to be there.
Yes, but yeah, as it.
Gets a little difficult when you start adding in all of these different scenarios and ways in which you have to show up. And for me, I love that we're thinking of these non traditional ways of having relationships, but also the dick, the pussy, the threesome could have just been that far that now you also think you want to be in a relationship with these people, but really, when you unphil the layers, these might not be people
that make a good partner. And I think that that's the last part I want to end on is that a lot of times we have sex with people and when that oxytocin and hormones and all the science happens, we get delusion and we start seeing these people is something more than just the great time that we had.
In the bedroom? Can I admit I am a very delusional person. But here's the thing. I love my delusions because I know how to separate them.
How do you separate your delusion if you delusion?
Well, because I know that the world sucks curiod. So like I know that when I'm having a delusion, it's like like this is amazing, not because this is actually amazing, Okay, makeing me it amazing. So when I'm thinking about like, oh this is so much fun, I might want to be with this nigga, I'm thinking to myself, I want to be with this nigga in this moment, but this nigga is broke or they're not doing anything what they like or we I mean, I can have fun with
the broke nigga. Oh, first off, let's be very clear. If y'all go, if y'all go back to.
Horrible decisions, maybe this was what was it probably pre pandemic, So maybe like twenty eighteen, twenty nineteen. I was fucking this nigga and he was fucking me so good, and we were like smoke blunts listening to Young Thug.
All the shit.
He don't want put me on the yr Thug Anyway, it was so good.
I considered what things could look like with us hold on you ready?
And he had nine kids.
Not only did he have nine kids, I fucked him and one of his baby mamas.
This is how But I considered so that it was really really, it's so bruh.
And I literally was like, oh, I could be with with nine kids? What was I But so I use that as the example of what it's good.
You really start thinking of all these things it could be, and it's like, bitch wake up.
Ye And so this might be a bitch wake up moment.
Yep, yeah it was. It was fun. Yep, it could yeah, bitch wake up? Yes, all right, you hit another point, but a very important one. It could definitely be a bitch wake up moment, just a bitch wake up.
I'm glad you. I'm glad you're enjoying it.
Glad that could you take that? It was so much fun that we are not supposed to be doing that on a regular basis, or that's so much fun. You don't need to marry that.
This should be for like holidays and birthdays.
And I was like, this is so much fun. We only need it on Labor Day after all. The bitches don't put the white away like this is when we're gonna have this. We don't need to marry this, We don't. We don't need to take this home. That's not what's happening at period. We don't need to take two people home to mom.
So our advice to you shape from Houston is bitch, wake up, douse you bite me fleep.
There's a lot of advice in there, but bitch wake up is the greatest lace man.
Yes, if you want more advice from us on you Got Decisions Again, email us Decisions Pod at gmail dot com.
Or if you want to leave a voicemail and be a part.
Of Mandy on the hotline over on the Patreon, it's ninety seven three nine three two zero.
Two two sell beach and that's all. See you guys next week. Bye.