You've Got Decisions: Am I Stupid for Sticking Around?

If you would like to have us answer your questions.

If you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or a terrible throuffle, guess what.

You've got decisions? You've got decision.

That that was like dingle from like you got mail, Like I feel like we gotta have somebody do that.

Like that was good. What do y'all do?

Y'all y'all creat about the somebody give us a goddamn jingles.

Got up to Luke and he has a Grammy?

Now Luke for real? Oh Mike, Yeah, I think he.

Has a Grammy and he made our Yeah, you didn't know he had a Grammy? Do we still start that week?

No, we don't.

We did a new one, by the way, in our hoes. Have you listened to it? It's like us giggling, and I was like, oh my god, girl, you gotta intro of decision decisions of decision decisions on the audio. You're gonna have to skip about six select bro, Bro, go listen to it.

It's not bad. It's not bad, bro. It's so actually welcome to the decisions decision. I don't think we should say this like that.

Listen, you definitely say it welcome, Welcome to the new party.

I mean you want to say together decision. Hey, guys, I love them to another episode. Bro, that's our intro.

That, by the way, you listening for the first time and me just finding out over the holidays.

That's how our shows start. I think we need a new intro.

BRO. I wait, how long has it been like this?

Bro?

I think Dwayne made it and he had to use our bloopers. Bro, you know we sell gross. This is how our podcast starts, y'all. They said, you say welcome, welcome, decisions decisions and we could.

Talk to someone. I hate it. We gotta talk to Black Effects immediately.

Okay, wait, let.

Me do it. Now, make a decision, Mandy. Wait, but what's my life? Then you gotta be like decisions decision?

No.

I want to say, were not making horrible decisions?

No more.

No, I thought.

Decisions decisions was like when you're like decisions decisions y'all.

We might need a jingle for that too.

On this, we need to revamp while we're in this good creative spirit together.

We have to revamp all of our ship.

But I'm an agreeance because this this is not okay.

Dog, I heard that but it's because my uber driver played it because he wanted to know what I was.

So I told him to listen to the the here the way the roomber driver didn't know you, but asked bright.

And then decided to play it in the car while I was there. So I'm listening to it and I said, now, what the fuck is this intro?

I hate it? Sorry, Dwayne, I know you're listening to put this out? I fucking hated is listening? Has he listened to anything? Because the cdium was like fi bro, I hated it. You know what?

This is why you can't give like sometimes two people get a little too creative.

Nigga heard the Bluebird was like, let me blend this up.

No bruh, So our music that used to be yeah, none of that's their No mo.

We need this is not cool.

We need to look up like an R and B singer that has the word decisions in a song and be like, hey, yo, could we use that because y'all don't know. We never asked Juicy J, but luckily he never came after us. I ripped that bitch. I ripped that straight from and then my homeboy was like, yeah, you know that's.

Juicy J and I was like, when I took it from you, you whatever, as in the juice man Gucci, No.

Not, I know, Okay, the nigga on one hand, I didn't know we bought racial so we got one hair right. Yeah. But like I made a huge mistake today and thought that Ruth Gater, Ruth Bader Gator, I thought she was a white woman, but she was Jewish.

I thought she was a black woman. I'm sorry, oh, I was Jewish is white.

I thought she was like giving Rosa Parks fair skin, But no, she's white Hwish. It's only because so I said, I think Crystal in this video of this husband trying to figure out like you know, the slide shows that you give people and they got to guess who the people is. So I told Chris, so I bet you don't know these white people. So it got to to Ruth Gator, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and she was like that nigga don't know Judge Judy, I said, that is anyway

I mean, I appreciate that you saw Ruth was a black lady because of how impactful she was. Guy, there we go, But the full name doesn't give what's supposed to be gays.

First off, our names come from slave masters. I just thought that's where her lineage took her.

Okay, fair, that's fair, that's fair. We'll take that. Okay. Anyways, if y'all want to send us a question about your raggedy life.

Bitch, send that shit over to decisious spot at gmail dot com. Because y'all's letters are like housewives to be. It reminds me that shit ain't that bad over here. So I appreciate these letters every single week. I'm not gonna hold you.

Sometimes the letters do make me feel like like I literally said to my nigga and dab he was an argument. I was like, you know what, it's bitches in my email talking about my man got another bat.

I was like, we were my nigga's not that bad. Ain't that man not that bad? At least you gonna know what the baby.

But now at this point, since the bitch knew him two years, like she said, last week, okay go go sorry.

Well this one.

Literally, the subject line is, am I stupid for sticking around?

So nine times out of tended?

You?

Yea yeah? But all right, come on, sister, let's let's let's let's let's help her out.

All right, here we go, Hello, just for some contacts. I'm a thirty one year old black woman. I need to know if I'm done for sticking around, because according to my friends, I am.

But your friends could be haters. So we're here to see if they're writer or not.

In June of twenty twenty five, I decided to shoot my shot at an old high school friend.

Well, he was more of my brother's friend than mine. I thought he was so cute back then, and he still find as hell now. I Oh lord, I took him on a date.

Jesus in Mandy put her hand over her mouth like something smelled bad. I took him on a date and stated that my intentions were pure and genuine. What girl?

This is what she said.

I told him that I wanted to see where this goes because I could see us being together. Oh told me about his trauma from his past relationship and that he's still healing. I understood because I had to heal from a five year situation. So to the present moment, We've been dating really heavy for the past few months and everything is going great. We spent holidays together, we met each other's family, and now Valentine's Day is approaching and my friends are wondering when he is going to

If you want to be with someone?

And maybe I'm too understanding, but I don't mind what we have going on now.

We go on frequent dates.

Hell, we even travel together. Our sex is amazing, don't they other people? Our families get along literally doing everything a couple does. But why do I have to feel so pressured to even put a title on it. Maybe it's the Scorpio and me because I love hard and get jealous from time to time. Sorry, Mandy, I know you don't like the stars and moons talk lol, But I really want him to be mine. But I'm also

Thanks? Love you both, Eh, I'm gonna let you go first. Gleasie who Okay?

First off, do you think being stupid?

I don't think you're stupid. I would never call a woman stupid for that. But what I would say, you like him more than he likes you. Ooh, and he knows it, he feels it, he knows it. Sometimes the way you start shit is the way shit ends. When shit starts fucked up, it ends fucked up. I've said that a lot on the show, and I think to get to the point where a man lets you take him out, now.

This is not oh don't stay there, so.

Okay, because I am if a nigga really fucked with you, their ego is not gonna nitch you take him on the first day, not the first It's different now, I think once you've been kicking it with somebody picking up the checking, shit is.

Cute, right, Like teamwork is a very normal.

Thing in relationship. Fifty to fifty is very normal. But there's something about the courting a man which led me, leads me to believe you're gonna have to ask that nigga to be your boyfriend.

You gonna have to get on one, Nieces.

I don't know if he's ever gonna do it for you because he knows how bad you want him, like for you to say the things about my intentions and this and that on a first date. It's just, even though we are non traditional women, there's certain things that we have to acknowledge and admit are traditionally not something that goes on. So it's interesting that you did something so non traditional but are expecting by Valentine's Day to be someone's girlfriend. Sounds very traditional to me. Yeah, so

Could it happened to you? Sure? Am I being pessimistic? Maybe? But the reason I'm doing it.

Is really because of how he was sought after in terms of paying for things pretty much maybe the last three relationships I've been in. I paid for things with Old Bay. I paid for things with scissors. I paid for things, you know, Like, I'm not dating like super duper wealthy people. We just do well and we share somethings sometimes with scissors. It was more fifty to fifty with Old Bay and my current boyfriend, it's not I would say, more like seventy five twenty five, which some

Well and I was very natural.

I was even gonna say, have you sat with what this title means to you? Because you said that you're feeling pressured to put a title on it because everyone else around you is calling you stupid.

But are you happy?

Because what this is giving is you feel like you are lacking something. So the fact that you had to say, we travel together, we go on frequent dates, our sex is amazing, we don't date other people, our families get along. There's something in here that you're not telling us that is missing from the commitment, which is why you're wanting that.

That's actually a great point because you're making the point of like our families or this, and that we don't date other people, like I don't.

Know, and is this a relationship or is it not?

And so what you're saying you're being pressured to put a title on it, but really, realistically, sit with what a title means to you, because it could mean something different to you than your friends that are applying this pressure. Are you comfortable? Do you do you feel secure? Is it a security blanket?

Even?

Oh and let me tell you, friends will make.

You feel like shit about choices you make.

With the many you choose the fuck I didn't listen. I told y'all in twenty twenty six. I ain't got no opinions on the niggas y'all choose to suck and fuck because it ain't my decision.

But if it was, it wouldn't be them.

Niggas, oh boy, because we decide we gonna suck and fuck different niggas. I ain't gat really no opinion on the nigga you suck because that you swallow don't make me shit.

Okay.

I don't know if you guys could hear the drill in the back, but the handyman are loving that.

But yeah, they so for me, it's it's weird because if you've been with the fan for six months, I'm curious too, do you refer to him as your boyfriend? So I wonder if it's no, it's how.

I'll be calling niggas my boyfriend clearly, but no. When I was, I mean, I still call my nigga my nigga.

But I made all these niggas be like you my boyfriend, right, So I'm your girlfriend, you my boyfriend, and this is what it is, just because now we got a responsibility to one of them.

Well, but to be all I was started doing what I was, started calling him my boyfriend, and see what you do, especially if your families get along, I'd be likeyfriend, I'm curious what your families if they're that intertwined what they refer to y'all as. Because also there's a difference between your families having been in the same space once and the casualness of it to it being a common thing that y'all's families just hang out.

I don't know.

Yeah, that that's interesting too, because family's meeting like I don't.

Know a just But also remember she said that, uh, this nigga is her brother's friend. So bitch, is it just he cool with your brother or is he cool with your family?

Because why he doesn't date other people? I'm curious.

Ooh, this don't have her thinking heat out here. She said they don't, so maybe they said they not. Oh okay, if he said I only want to date you, now you know she didn't say that in the letter. This is why we might need to be see, y'all need to get a deeds bruh, I don't date other people. But also she used that D word. I told y'all in twenty twenty six. That word is so.

But is he fucking other people? Because maybe he don't take other bitches on date and.

Take up on the phone with them, But is he entertaining situationship wise with other bitches?

Like is it a conversation about.

I mean, she's vacationing and doing all this stuff with him, so she sees that she's taking them both of his time.

So in vacation married man, what the fuck that mean? We don't show it on a trip together. So you the main you to mad. But I will tell you this.

I'm gonna be thirty five in a few months, and what I will tell you that I have learned that.

I learned this.

At thirty boy, when a nigga wants you, is it loud? It is loud, It's easy, Oh my god, it's loud.

It is so loud. I've learned that. Now I've like it. Maybe took me to thirty four thirty five Voto seven.

Do I want anyone listening to this to not think we're speaking to the woman that wrote the letter. But I want you to listen to this just for any situation you ever had from a man when it was fucking confusing, when it's fucking confusing. There is either another person or fleeting thought that they have about wanting to get into relationship. It's not always you, it's just about

So it was easy.

I want to say, same night, same day conversation she had with me was done.

Oh yeah, we together. So when people feel that for you, when they don't want to lose you, David, bitch a. You're not going a little bitch now. And I'm not here for ultimatum.

But it's weird because I want you to want more for yourself if you want a relationship. You see his saying you willn't be patient until when until he go out find somebody else he liked. And now you sit here, sitting here with paint on your face, like, if you want to be more with him, if y'all are going about everything that entails a relationship, ask him what's holding him up from the title. Then agreed, and then you need to decide what you want. But it can't be to just wait around for a man.

To choose you. You have to choose yourself.

And I think you know, we have such poor dating experiences that we like to take leaps ourselves. So I think asking a man out on a date isn't terrible be like I want to, But I think offering to pay.

Is the way she said I took him out on a date. She definitely paid.

So it was something about the language of like my intentions and taking out.

I said, I want to be genuine and with intent and yuh yeah, I think it's like I'm going to cover. I'm gonna like it's.

Like, oh okay, yeah, you're giving off that you like him more and he's not.

He doesn't feel like he's in the risk of losing you. Oh he's gonna say he's stay bringing you along until you know.

This is also by the way, you wrote us for answers, and I'll give you the immediate one. After all this shade we've thrown you have a conversation with him, letting him know like, hey, like my expectations of where we're going. Is that one up in a committed relationship?

Do you see that with me? Oop?

But I asked, that's what you got to ask me, And you need to ask him that before Valentine's Day, bitch, so that you have time to book that flight the All Star weekend and get you.

Know, Cammy, we did Cammy Crawford's pod and she said something about getting no.

No, no, no she did. She said I'm getting married soon. She did. She was like, I don't have to notice, and you know what, yep, and she got that ring.

I understand because I had a conversation when we were in Brazil where it was like, I don't know, maybe I've never said it like that before, Like I already knew what track I was on, but I was like, yeah, when, like, what gauge do you have because I'm gonna like, you know, my get like and it was.

Very and I remember that Nigga was choking on the fucking water.

Yeah, but I could tell cam you had one of those, because like, as women, we need to know where our future is going, right, Like we need to know we need to feel safe in making decisions, et cetera. And I think the same for starting relationships. So talk to that nigga, and don't be scared to talk to him either.

You're worth it.

You've been dating him six months, Yep, you're someone that he's not gonna want to fuck us up with. But you need to ask.

I agree with you. You need to ask or or go date somebody else. That's what I will tell you.

Uh.

Anyways, if you want to send in your letter and get our amazing advice because you always have a decision, make sure your email email us Decisions Pod at gmail dot com. And if you want to watch the full video of us looking all natural, no makeup, a bitch got lip lost on though, go ahead and join us on the paton. That's patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions, where you also can get a bonus episode of Horrible Decisions because puts a whole it ain't go no, well,

And there's other tiers with blogs and blogs and all the things.

Again, that's Patreon dot com Backslash Horrible Decisions.

Fin Niggas