Ep43: Riding D-ck, Orgasms, and Free Love Feat Glamazon Tyomi

society UM puts out there for women. And you guys make my days so much better and I appreciate and Mandy again, I love you so much, girl. I gotta get my blue check game up like you. I got one so far. I'm trying to wrack them up in twenty eighteen. But I love you Dye so much. To keep doing what you do. I learned so much from you guys, and keep it going. I love you. I would say my name, but I don't want anybody who like him but kissings think it luckily, just love you

a game by Oh wait, I do I've heard something? Mother? How do you not know? Can you let it keep playing? For you? Don't need to keep playing. Anybody knows this. The fucking video guy knows this. Who is this? You know what? I don't know what whole you've been? Who is that? I've heard it, I've heard the little do you are you gonna act like you've never done a podcast before? Who's the bike? Up? God? Damn, you still don't know this? You know what? Mandy? This is? Who's

the one that white? Guys? Is it you? Because what the fun is going on? I'm really confused? Who is that? It's any r D. It's parrelling me on It's called lemon. Oh that's where I saw her performing and I got shaded so hard ten minutes ago for noting and loving hip hop ship Please, this is brand new, probably just came out. I don't listen to the radio. I listened to what I download. It's just something I haven't downloaded. I mean, what do you want me to do? Anyways? Guys, Um,

welcome to fucking fuck the bullshit. This is my first time seeing Wheezy in No, it's not. I'm right, I definitely just saw you last week. Kind of up. Um, welcome guys to yet another episode of horrible Decisions. I'm your girl Mandy B and I'm Weezy, And today we are starting off the new year with yet another guest who's late. But listen, y'all, if y'all can give me the time to give guests to not be in CP time. Since I know a lot of y'all is black, let's

have the discussion real quick. How early do I need to tell black people to show up to show up on time? I feel like I always like for me, it's always fifteen minutes, which is why always have a fifteen minute like, so we recorded right now at six pm. I say, girls, can you shot show up by five forty five? She's about saying she's gonna arrive at six fifteen, which that makes me your thirty minute. And then I'm sure I'm gonna like her. I'm not. I'm positively gonna

like her. You're just a bit. But I hate how people are just not considerative. Other people are the latest guests we've ever had. It was funny, people like I wish you did longer episodes. No, he just know then they just showed up thirty minutes late. No, mart Marcus also showed up late from hip hop We you don't remember because we just started recording and we ended up paying for extra STUDIOSI um, this is really frustrating. Foreen, guys, I need all of my black people to come together

and show up on time. I have something to talk about this random Yeah. I couldn't sleep last night, so I went on Lipstick Ali to see what ship people talk about. They think, let me just keep going to that trash it's trash sight. But I'm gonna tell you one thing. The people they keep listening to us, so it's clearly people that some of them comes, they're miserable, they probably really hate my guts and are just trying to think. But some of them are patrons, so they

do listen to the show. This is where they spilled tea, like whatever, they really think we're not going to have that. They they're like they hate each other. They were like, oh my god, you're starting to notice how much they don't like each other blah blah, And I'm like, nothing has changed. We hated each other the same from the very first show. So I don't really know why they think it's getting work. Why you keep reading it? Because that's okay. People that love us follow us on Instagram

and write us a lot unless they're anonymous emails. I don't feel like I really get that much honest feedback unless it's from my friends. My friends keep they're like, y'all were wrong, y'all did this wrong. You should have researched this more about HIV and blah blah blah, which I understand. But other than that, besides the ship talking stuff, these are people that are honest. Because they're anonymous. It might be trolling, but they're trolling is fun, but listen,

it's sucking honest. So I don't know why they say we argue too much now and I'm just like, I feel like we've always hated each other as much. But yeah, um they oh, oh my god, they know where I work now, Like it's crazy, dude. No, They've all like they're all, Mandy do this, how's manny doing finance and and and being a who at the same time, she's got to pick one. I don't. I don't understand why I can't suck dick and have a job. Like it's

really confusing me. But but yeah, they're all guessing who the funk we're fucking she's They're trying to guess who loverboy is they're trying to get pretty close. Um, it's just fucking annoying at this point, so I don't go on there. Not only that they think that we're confused as too because we're traditional. They were talking about us wanting to cook for our man and do stuff for

our man. In the b K Chat episode they dragged for filth, how we talked to mean Okay, now, when I look back at it, I blamed it on you. Remember when we left to everything, But when I listened to it, we were both pretty You need to really re listen to stuff because then you'll start hearing a

lot of bullshit. The show asked us. I, Um, yeah, they were like saying, which is easy to think of Nandy after the married thing, and blah blah blah, and um, I guess like someone had also brought up how when we discussed you calling me promiscuous and which I'll stand by every motherfucking things. So now and like, okay, that

was a episode that was a while ago. But one thing, and mind you, this is just us filling time and for our latest latest guess I do want to say it wasn't necessarily that I think in the moment it bothered me because it felt like such a label and like I've been telling you recently, like I hate this whole, like you're this and this and that, like I've been called a hoe fully clothed or before someone knew me, or just because I won't talk to guys, like fuck

you ho. It's like it's just you so much. And then I think, like the word promiscuous is also labeled as a bad thing. Well, promiscus to me, like I was up as an adjective and not necessary a label, and as an adjective as defined by Wikipedia, it's stuck and like, but if you're skinny, you're skinny. There's a definition for skinny. Still if you light skinned, I don't know. I don't really care if people think I'm promiscuious or not. Some people, in their minds, promiscuous is going to be

the word they use. Um. But see what you just said, that's growth and you don't know it. But just said I don't care if people see me as promiscuous. That is motherfucking growth, Because how would I care? I didn't care because where we started, when we started, we started this show, when who said let's call it horrible? But when we started this show. We talked about this off air. You were caring about how people were I'm not anything. This is I'm trying to be your therapist here. I'm black.

I have black therapist. Well I'm happy and we're gonna do this right now. And I feel like you literally just showed a little bit of growth, which I'm proud of you. I mean, that's my good thing to say. I think I can't like it was a different like I always said I didn't care, but now I'm like really starting not to give a book, Like I can read terrible things about myself Now I'm like, oh, and maybe that's because I smoke more marijuana or whatever it is.

But speaking of that, my therapist is like really trying to get me some weed. And I just really appreciate him for that. Um And it's funny because like, oh my god, I guess you can't find this. He know his name of my podcast. But I was telling you how I'm like trying to trick him into giving me the next How do you Why are you tricking? It's so simple, like I'm already stressed out and ship and so terrible. By the way, I just look up the symptoms exactly, and I'm just like, I don't know why.

I'm just feeling really anxious, particularly in the workplace, and I feel like it's affecting my well being. You're terrible. What do you think I could do for that? And then look at me and be like, I don't know, I don't know. Maybe we should try something like an edge of the past. Maybe I'm like, really think, I mean, I don't know if I should do like drawing. You know, what the funk all of these things do? I got prescribed coding and you were like, just lose it on

the train. They'll give you another prescription. I'm like, no, bit, you're not taking my coding. Well, I'm saying, if you say you lost it like right after you got it, they'll probably give you another one. Yeah, you're pretty trashed for that. So I guess I wanted UM because we talked about this, I want to say, on the Lisa

sliftson episode and UM or maybe before that. So we talked about, of course UM writing Dick, and that was so weird that you were like, I never well, it's not that I've never wrote Dick, but I'm you know, a bitch. I'm on the big side. So writing Dick for me is a lot of motherfucking work. I think it's a lot of work for anybody. I worked out five days a week and I still feel like I'm going to pass out, That's what I'm saying. And so I am just not a fan of writing Dick. I

think it's a calvs thing. I'm trying to think what part of me hurts while writing Dick. But anyway, we'll listen, and you got a lot and these guys for real. So anyways, last night I was late. You know that Naga and um I had probably one of the best orgasmic experiences. I don't know if it was because I was on coding or if that was definitely, but the dick was so so I was writing him. He was sitting down in the sitting down position and I was sitting on him facing the opposite way and going up

and down, and I like almost couldn't stand up. He was almost laughing at me because I came multiple times like that, and I was like, Nigga, you know, I don't be writing your dick. This is good. And I had to tell him. I was like, don't get comfortable. This ain't gonna happen. But he was like, man, you could barely stand up, like it just kept I just kept shaking and it was fucking well. For one, amazing if you had your medicine that was prescribed. I just

want to say that. It was sounding like I know they know I'm the crazy one, but yeah, I mean you were on that, so you're already like super relaxed and everything feels you fork. So that's probably why you came super hard. But second, this is exactly why BIT just like to ride because you feel it on your It was so good, and mind you. I told him before um, because you know, I just had surgery. I'm

gonna talk about that. But I was like, you gotta be, you know, gentle, because he'd be sucking me like we like poor star set Like you gotta be gentle. So we started with the writing thing and I was just like feeling I actually felt the orgasms in my stomach. I was like, Okay, well, maybe I need to turn around because this might not be a good thing that

I'm feeling this. It was just a look I'm left her right now, bitch, I'm really going back thinking like if I show you hold on, I want to show you. Hold on, I'm gonna show me this. If I show you this text, No, this text message after this is how you know what's good? I said, I said it wouldn't stop. Oh my god. Let me just first start by saying, there is a gift I don't know. It looks like a busted pipe and there's just like water

like spewing out of it. And she put liked with four ease like that, daddy, don't I don't have a good studio session. Then she sends the game and put it wouldn't stop upside don't smiley face, definitely need one more where you jet set? Then when he said, laughing my ass off twelve hours later, because well, she sends Jack Conan O'Brien jumping up and down, happy Hi, And look we was talking about riding dick and you're the perfect person to be walking in But that all right?

Guess is here? Guys, she's wearing we recorded this ship and thigh high boots. So we're gonna set you deep yourself or your husband as well. Okay, so we're gonna sit you over No, let's set you right here. Yeah, no, sit her over there. I want to look you can look right next to you. Okay, no, now we're gonna put it right here, all right, So we might want to bring him on as well, um, because you know we got some questions. Um, so guys, I guess we can introduce our guests. Who is here? Um? We have

Tyomi who every one? Well? Yeah everyone? Um. So it's so crazy because I think between Instagram and Twitter, everyone was just like, why you ain't had it on the show. Yeah, this is who you need? Bring her on the shot. And I was like, okay, So then we were talking, but it was while you were out of town. It was over the holiday. There were studio dealing with all of this. I'm like, okay, we're gonna We're gonna get

you in here. Girl, just hold out. Um, do you live in the right Yeah, I'm like part time between New York and Chicago. So I got married on saturdayation. I saw a picture of you guys. So you guys are so like so it's like a book cover. I know, it's very like time. So like cocoa butter love Shay butter coconut oil. Instance, Yeah, you look like type you have instant when Yeah, what's this like incense? Male name?

Actually it's his name night in. Oh, maybe we gotta start sucking two instance with names and maybe they'll come into our life. I do like say, you know, I don't had African dick be small though. Um I'm the ones I've had. African American dick is great, but African African them maybe because if they were paying for it, maybe that's why. Oh you might be right, Well, they're married,

that's why they pay it, not because they dick small. Um. Anyways, anyways, guys, we want to go ahead and I guess introduce you. So you're a sexpert, you're a blogger, you're a pleasure like trainer, you do you do so many things, so let our listeners know exactly what you're known for. UM. I am known for sex education. I've been teaching for the last seven years, primarily online. I've toured the world

with my classes. UM. I have a YouTube channel where I show people how to get into like different So, like sixteen million views on how to ride? Did we to show like with somebody from the audience. We picked a girl for Mandy to demonstrate on it was not good. Yeah, you know, I didn't know you need to agree for that. You don't but you know, it's like just one of those things that's not something that you just know how to do. It's it's takes take practice. You have to

be in shape. When I say in the shape, I don't mean like you know, fitness guru in the gym. Like there's a specific set of muscles that are being used when you're on top, so we have to develop them. We just talked about writing real quick, because I don't need to have it in for you to talk about writing, but one of my favorite things I need to know

that because I just rode again from you. We were just saying that hurts, like because I always feel like it doesn't matter if you're in shape or not like that, it's your hip flexus. Your hip flexus, I feel like, get to my legs. I feel like like calves or something. Do I not? Maybe I mean think about that's that machine you go in the gym, but think about it too, Like you don't sit in that position often at all. And we sit down most of the time, so like

I feel like I do on my squatty party. Yeah, like we we sit down so much like our our hip muscles and our leg muscles get tight and they get weakened like we are. We pretty much lip sedentary lifestyles. So so how do I make like how do you every day? That's it stretching, not like not squats or something, stretch me squats, any type of like leg lifts or kickbacks, any type of lower body exercise will work for it.

But I teach a class specifically that targets the muscles that you use during riding, and it kind of like simulates it. It's like a mixture of twerking and like hip rolling, but literally it's you doing it full out for like at least three minutes at a time per song.

How many people pass out? Not many. It's it's challenged, especially when I'm kind of lazy, like I could suck a dick and don't get tired as much as Okay, well I didn't work, so I'll just play on my stomach now, just workout, especially when like you know, if you have really wet pussy in and like his size, like he keeps sleeping now a little bit, like you

gotta really adjust it. It's I don't think men realize how much be going on through our minds when we're trying to not only please ourselves, but please them, Like, aside from not dying with a dick down my throat, it's like when I'm fine and the city it's not a job for nothing. When I'm finally taking it, it's like, Okay,

does this feel good for him? And then apparently there's a grinding thing that a lot of females do when they're on dicks that don't feel good for me about that, like, oh, we don't love because the it's supposed to be a stroke, just like how he strokes you, So the vagina is supposed to slide on and off the dick. And if you're just sitting there grinding, if he's deep and you're grinding and there's still some like movement in there, like

a little swirl, it could feel good. But for the most part though, because most women are just sitting there scooting school in their clips on his tail best and he's like person. But I feel like, I mean, we do enough, look and I could, like you could take some. I feel like there's so much pressure put on people

in general for what is supposed to be done. But really, if you never want to ride dick ever in your life, you don't have to listen for the three years, right, exactly three and you can't believe all you do well God damn, but I mean I haven't asked. That's why they like to behind me. I was gonna say, when you have asked, don't matter however, being on the skin, your side, my hands, and yeah, you're doing when you

had when you are a thick girl. Like there are things that can substitute for riding on top, because for most guys, if you're thinking you get on top, it's a wrap there. Like I want to have controls and then get behind you. But even then, like you can't even really throw it back that much because if you start throwing it back, depending on the guy, he'd be like whoa, whoa too much? Okay, then I'll just can't back. Well, I this was I appreciate that we were riding dick. Um,

I guess intro that we just had. We normally start with icebreakers, and I did want to get into these icebreakers because they kind of I picked them because they kind of relate to what you do as well. Okay, so the first one is gonna get into kind of what you do. Um, so it's would you rather be able to speak every language and lose the ability to write or write in every language and lose the ability to speak. And I know you do you speak second, right,

So you would rather lose the ability to write. Oh, you would rather write in every language and lose the ability to speak. So you're better with your writing than speaking, great with both. But like writing is so therapeuty for me, I would just say about to be a mute and just be able to Yeah, I love our love writing. I mean most of my career is writing. Like I run a blog, I write for cashious life. I mean, I mean it's gonna be a lot harder to have

a job if you can't write. Then if you could just yeah, because like literally for the government, most of my jobs exactly unless you dictate it. I mean you can just put on the microphone and then okay, okay. So here's the second one. Would you rather increase your level of sexual romance or your sexual experimentation? Um, sexual sperimentation?

So you would rather increase that because I think we're all the things personal though maybe she's already got such a good romance level, like going on, Yeah, I mean romance is really what you make it, and everybody gives romance all the meaning it has, Like giving flowers could be romantic to some people but not to others, Like some women women might not think that, you know, receiving

flowers is romantic. So I would rather experiment with sex over you know, the whole romantic with you being a sex educator and helping people through the bedroom, is there anything left for you to experience a people? There's a whole They ask us that a lot, a lot, especially if you go on to B D S, M and kink.

That's what are your top two things that just came in your head with kink of things you haven't tried that you want to, Um, maybe like sex on a roller coaster, just that possible though it is possible to think about it sexy. Oh you know the whole like th real seeking thing and my exhibition is too so okay um, and then like I just want to have a big orgy. I mean I've had one before, but like how many people were in the one that you've had? Um, it was like four guys and it was three girls.

But I was kind of just like doing my thing with one, so I wasn't involved with everybody, So it was just like everybody having sex at the same time in the same place kind of a thing. Was this a front thing or was this a swinger sex club? It was like we were in Vegas and no more we get it. Yeah your vagina Vegas. Yeah. So would you rather have amazing sex the last forty seven seconds

or average sex for ten minutes? Both of those are whacked Well, yeah, amazing for one minute, almost amazing sex with me just hitting my A spot repeatedly, So I'll take that, and you know that's the kink. We're gonna get into what the A A spot is and then a little big guys, would you rather be a set slave for a month or we're a chastity device and not be able to have sex or math device? Because sex slave that ship could get crazy, Like you know what's crazy.

I kind of fantasize fetisize that or I don't know what to say, but that's kind of that's kind of one thing I would I would know, I would like to kind of be a sex slave or like a weekend because somebody has you literally have no right saying when I say something, no, no, you have I would like to be a sex slave, so you have no right, so like right so just think about it for a second, a black guy, because if you are a black guy, black straight, Okay, are you thinking submission or do you

know what a sex slave entails. A sex slave entails you doing whatever the guy wants sexually, right, So you got to think about this. You have to ask if you want to stand up listen, Oh, that's that, But it's beyond that, Like there are some guys who are into like pissing on you, shooting on you, beating you

in the face. You can have hard limits, you know, right, So if you're a sex slave and you're like, okay, um, you're agreeing to it, and you're like, whatever I want to do, let's limit that to a sex slave with the niggas, I know they don't even wanted to do, no ship more than what I want to do being submissive.

Though that's not really like a sex slave, like people say, think of fifty Shades of Grade when she had to sign all that stuff, even though it's a very vanilla movie to something, that's the best example of what it means. You say, sex slave is all bets are off. It's whatever that person wants you to do unless you do sign some kind of contract before. But if there's no contract,

it's like you're just submitting to whatever. And when you when you give them that permission, something switches, like because once they know you don't have any limits, anything can be done. You don't know what the topped the last thing you did? I did it for like an hour and it was too much. Okay, well it's so crazy y'all. Still haven't um wean me off of not wanting to be a sex slave. Oh, you can do whatever you want.

I'm just saying, just be ready for whatever, you know, and i'd be telling this whatever, So it makes sense. So the last question is would you rather not be able to see during sex or not be able to touch during sex? See? Because I get blindfolded anyway? Oh yes, blind really good? Really, I won't get blindfolded again. I got blindfolded, took his condom off, surprising me. When he took before he took the blindfold off, he was like

up here, felt mad at me. That's bad. Yeah, so we actually talked about that too, But that's why I was like, I have kind of PTSD now from being held, so I don't want the blindfold. I had a very bad and a very good experience. My worst one was our first episode the Missing Condom. This guy like really tried because he felt like I was just too sexually advanced, and he just he blindfolded me right out into the shower and he's like, meet me in the bedroom. I'm

like where that sounds bad already now. The best one I've ever had was my first time having sex with someone I had known for months, so I felt comfortable enough to do this and he, uh, he told me to stand, I mean, be on my knees, turned away from my front door, and when he came in, he blindfolded me, didn't take it off until he was inside of me. It was like forty five minutes of four plane. I was like, when do I get to see you?

And I was touching his face. It's everything got more intense. Like, yeah, I've actually wanted to ask well her boyfriend a few times, but I feel like he's gonna be like asking to do what another niggaid, can't you He listened to the shows blin him exactly what she wants to do, the exact same thing that she did. Yeah, he could do it better. I mean, look, no matter what the sex act is, it's not like just reserve for one person because it's like, hey, it was great, but I want

to do with you. It's not like you never know if at that point, come on, all right, well, I'm so glad you brought it up because I don't even think I told you he was gonna mention this. I can't remember if I sent you this or not. But the A spot, So you did a blog on it. You talked a lot about this A spot, and all I know is about the G spot so and the P spot that's the prostate one for men um. So

I want to know what this A spot is. Um, Can you give us maybe a definition and let our listeners know how they can reach this if maybe they haven't been able to find the G spot and this is another way for them to reach orgasm. Yeah, the A spot is actually deeper within the vagina, so yeah, the G spot is only two inches within the vagina, right on the front of the wall. Like all right, okay, we get that, but not everyone is like comfortable with G spot simulation. I know I'm not, Okay, shout out

to you. I don't like it. So I feel like it's like I feel like the pulling and then I think about nails and I'm on the outside here because I like, I can't heard about it everyone who's different, like I just I really just don't like to feel. But the hay spot though it's deeper, it's on the front wall of the vagina as well. It's up near the cervix and when it's stroke, of course, it's in

a rogeni zone. So when it's stroke it creates like these really guscy like waves of orgasms and the vagina just gets extremely moist, and you probably did, but it's it's with deep penetration and it gets pretty up there. It's kind of big, yep, as long as you are aiming towards the front of the vagina, so like towards

the belly button, you'll find it there. And can it be like now do Morris men that are listening, can they do this with their hands or with they can do it with their hands and their penises, you know, so a hand can reach far enough because the vagina is only about five and I don't get to your service of course, right, So you had one he got

right up in the it's probably where it's stock. So yeah, I mean it's a spot that people don't really know about, but they've probably felt it because men can feel it to like when they hit it, it feels like kind of slippery. Okay, okay, so once they hit that spot, you both like simultaneously will go, oh my god, what is that? You know, because it's just it feels really good,

and as it's repeatedly stroked, it's like the orgasms. They're not like super hard legs shaking orgasms, but they feel like they radiate from your pelvis and just kind of go throughout your body and you just become waste and they just come back to back to back. It's I have a question that has been brought up a lot. We had a doctor on the debunked um the squirting. Okay, so like can we talk about like the fluid because you're mentioning like cushiness and stuff like that, Like how

is this secretion happening during squirting? What spot is it from? And is it mixed with some p in it? Because a lot of people are nervous about her face. Well know a lot of people are nervous that they're yeah, yeah, of course you're nervous that you're gonna pe on somebody because it's coming from the same hole that you pee from, it from your eurethra. But the source of squirting is not from the bladder. It's from the skins gland, which

is literally the same as the male prostate. It's just shrunken down and it sits right near the opening of the urethra. But now when we watch in porn, how these girls are like shooting out? And I've heard from a porn star to be nameless, but she said that people that were doing squirting sings for drinking mad water before. And yeah, you have to like my when when I when the guy who likes to be piste on, when he has me squirt, he wants me either drunk or

he'll drink, but you on. So that's what I'm saying, Like, what we're watching on film is that real? Are these girls pein? No, the average woman in porn is peeing, she's just drinking. So when it really irritates me when guys are like mad pressed to try to make their women squirt, and I'm like, hey, you don't even understand that what you're seeing in porn is unrealistic because it

is forced and it is um exaggerate. It The average woman can squirt anywhere from a few drops to like maybe a half a pint or more, depending on like her body and stuff and also her hydration levels. But the fluid is not P. Now, can a woman make a mistake and it's not not even really mistake, is just what happens to your body. Can a woman like

P during sex? Yeah, she can. It's called incontinence, you know, especially if you're a woman that has had a child or two and you know your bladder is kind of weak. But um, squirting legit is just as a clear fluid. It's like similar to the fluid that mixes with sperm. Yep, It's just it's watery and like if you taste it, it's kind of sweet. It doesn't have a smell. It's warm, of course, Um can droplets of P being that? Yeah, sure,

it's coming from the urethra, you know what I mean. Um, But if a woman doesn't squirt it out, then it just goes back into the bladder and then you pee it out when you go and use the bathroom after you have sex. So I guess basically what you did just say for for our listeners, there is a difference between making a girl squirt and making a girl piss And because guess what, the bladder is right there next to all the other organs that are being stimulated when

you're having sex. So if she has not um used the bathroom before sex, if you're going harder, you're in a certain position, you can be hitting the bladder to where she feels like, oh my god, I gotta pete, and she may just pete and that can happen. But listen, so like the squirting on demand that people are seeing, right, because squirting on demand from porn that that's bullshit, that's bullshit. And can you squirt when the A spot is stimulated?

Only the Yeah, you can square when the A spot is stimulated, And like more women are going up, more women I think squirt from like clatoral simulations then penetration. But the time I've definitely squired it from penetration and it was involuntary. I wasn't trying to do it. It just happened, you know what I mean. So, but there are women out there they can squirt on command. When you have control over your pelvic muscles, you can do that. You know a lot of control. It is it is

muscles that I can grip helvic muscles. Well it, that's the same thing. I mean. Now, can I think another question um their listeners may have is can every woman squirt? Does every woman have the ability to do it? Sure? Like every woman unless you have some type of magmatical condition, has the same anatomy. But it's every woman going to do it in her lifetime. No, because it takes a certain level of knowledge and comfort and stimulation in order

for it to happen. And when men are like going all hard and trying to force it to happen, like, that's when it doesn't happen the most because you're chasing it away when you create anxiety. Anxiety and stress are like two of the top libido killers, so you're like pressure on her, Come on, baby squat. For me, it's like, I understand you want to be encouraging, but right now it's not a happen I was reading something that said, um of women have tried to square it for the

first time. Uh, we're like pressured into it and didn't feel like it was natural. And that's almost half of every time. It's funny that so many men want to feel and make a woman squirt more than I even hear women want to see why I'm listening. Yeah, it's a part of it. It's part of the ego because

men um think about sex very externally. They think about sexual response very externally because of house, they respond to sexual stimuli, so you know, when they have an orgasm, they're used to seeing semen coming out of their penises. For us, we are internalized, so when we have orgasms, everything's happening within us, but you don't see anything. So

for them, it's like the ultimate achievement. If I made her squirt, I know that I did a good job man, And it's like not necessarily, bro, I can still have a great time and feel amazing without squirt and apparently not her excuse me when I was reading that squirting each time, it's not always an orgasm. It's not because sometimes, like literally, a squirt will happen without you even having an orgasm. It's just it's being stimulated, it wants to come out. You let it flow, you know. Sometimes in

the company's an orgasm. Sometimes it doesn't. So just because you make her squirt does not mean you're doing a good job at being a lover. You know, just her body responding and I know this wasn't part of it. I feel like I feel like people really had a lot of questions. It's like one of the most asked questions, and it's so annoying to me because I'm like, man, can you learn how to do fourplay first before you try to Frustrated, she was like, look like it's real,

but it's not what you're seeing on TV. Like stop this like facade of Like there's definitely, yeah, there's definitely. So with looking into UM what you do and even reading how you met your husband and reading that story, I was just like, she's perfect. So we do a lot of talk about couples in relationships. You're kind of an expert at that UM and so when I looked at UM, something that you practice right now with your

husband is free love. Before we get into that UM, I kind of wanted to go down because I saw you list all of these UM types of dating UM titles. I guess that you could have the labels, and I know, I kind of there's so many, but I actually didn't know like three of them. So I want to go through with our listeners because UM, we have a lot of listeners right now who are trying to find. I

don't know non binary, triads, quads, solo, poly like. So I just saw these quick lists on your right up and I was like, Okay, well, maybe I can get a definition because maybe there's people out here who want to certain relationship and don't know how to address it or don't know what other partner to look for who aligned with this, So let's I guess start with the one that is sort of um easy. It's funny because me and Weezy just spoke about this. Non monogamous entering

a non monogamous relationship with someone means what. So non monogamous is like basically an umbrella. Non monogamy will basically categorize everything else we're seeing here. So it's like the umbrella. It means that you are not with just one person, whether that be socially meaning living together and all that, or sexually meaning solo just with sex with one person. Okay, So polyamorous, we've talked about this, Do you want to give that one real quick? We don't stay on that one.

Polyamory is basically having a relationship with other people where everyone involved knows what's going on and everyone has to consent of everyone involved too for all this stuff to go down. And it's not just about sex. It's also romantic partners as well. And most of the time people have like a primary partner and then everyone else outside the primary partner is considered a paramore. A paramore, Okay, I've never heard of that one. It's it's a lot, it's a lot. It's a lot, And so that's poly

What does a solo poly? So, solo Polly is a person who doesn't have a primary partner and they choose not to take on a relationship that takes on the form of a traditional relationship. Unicorn, I mean, I guess if you want to call it that, the unicorn is polyamorous,

because unicorn could just be somebody that's guest starring. Really right, Yeah, So this person, you know, they hold down multiple romantic and sexual relationships without having a primary partner and without choosing to be in a relationship that looks like the typical. Like you know, I'm dating this one person, you know, like a typical So would that be like Milo Darling, have you watched but she doesn't when correct me if

I'm wrong. Most everyone everyone about each other. Yeah, and everyone doesn't know about each other, So she skipped a little bit. But triads, I guess that's definitely what I had. Then, a triad in the quad is basically a polyamorous relationship with everybody lives together in the same household. So if it's three is try's four as quad and that's under the poly. But but in that sense, they're all dating

each other and can't have outside relationships. They're all one relationship, like one big unit, living together, all contributing to each other's financial wellness and all that stuff. So but it's like, um, there could be a primary partner within that, but they're all just together, Okay. And then swingers, Um, we've talked to you guys. We we pretty much know what swinging is. Um,

So you don't practice any of these non binaries. Basically, people who are in relationship that do not subscribe to gender roles because talking about like a gender being, non virus sexuality, yeah okay, not okay, not identifying with gender roles. So of all of these labels, you say, throw all them ships away. Um, they're okay, there's nothing wrong we're practicing any of that. The main focus is are you

practicing love? Because a lot of people what they do who is they get into these relationships, But they're still boundaries, are still rules, they're still controlled, they're still jealousy, they're still all these things that pop up because they're not remembering the love in an end. Also, they don't have a real purpose. But why they're even in this type of relationship. It's like, okay, so you want to be polyamorous, but what is your purpose? Is it just so that

you can fund other people? And that's it? Because if that's if that's it, that's not going to go anywhere. You know, having a purpose in your relationship is a destination because it's a relationship a ship being a vehicle, so it has to carry you somewhere. If you don't have a purpose, then why are you even doing it? Right? You know what I mean? Because for the polyamorous person who has a binary part of a primary partner and then you have all these other people, what is your

purpose for having all these other people? Is it just so you can funk all the people? Because if that's the case, why are you even having this title? Like and so free love is different these and what it's just I call it. I called it free love because the Irish person won't understand that love in itself is free. Love is freedom, So that for me to be able to explain it to people where they understand is to call it something, to give it a label, but really

it has no label. My husband and I love each other, and we love everyone in our lives the same. Love is freedom, and within that you know he's not. He doesn't require for me to change and thing about myself. I don't require for him to change anything. And we have multiple partners in our lives, and that does not mean that all of our partners are sexual partners. His mother is a partner, My mother is my partner. His sisters, his brothers, his business partners, his friends, these are all partners.

I got a question coming. So the love that we that we practice is just love, and we don't. We don't hold any restrictions on each other. I haven't, so cheating, So cheating doesn't exist in your relationship. There's no way that because he could cheat or you could cheat. The only way that we can cheat is if in our minds we forget who we are to each other, and we forget that we're on the same team. It's not about what we do or don't do with our bodies

because our bodies don't mean anything. We're spiritual beings having a human experience. But when people get into relationships, they believe they have dominion over the other person's body. Oh you're mine now, so you're not allowed to go and have sex with someone else. But love says you're free to do what you wanna do and don't do what you don't want to do. So for me to say, hey, Naim, you can't go share your dick with anyone else because I own you, that's not love. That's not love, that's

that's me being in my ego. He's free to do whatever he wants to do, and he chooses to be with me. Likewise, do I choose to be with him? So our definition of cheating is if in my mind, I'm like, Naim is a fucked up person like my egos telling me bullshit that I know it's not true, and then I start believing it and then I start

attacking him. That's true infidelity when you start forgetting that your partner is an innocent party, who who you trust and who you love, and then you start attacking them because you're believing lies that your ego is telling, right, So you're saying cheating has nothing to do have nothing to do with what we don't do with our bodies, That has everything to do with how we think about it, right, Because a lot of people say that you can cheat

just by texting someone else or being like emotionally involved with someone else. So it's funny because but so many women to look for their partner to be doing something wrong, and so you got to really look at it. What are you basing your relationship on? Are you basically get on love, which is the content, or are you basically get on the form meaning um sex, romance, text messages,

phone calls, dates, who you talk to, who you interact with. So, because if you then if that's not cheating, then what is it called? When our average definition of cheating where someone's partner ends up sleeping with someone else and they're being lied to, then what's that? That's that's people labeling, labeling it whatever they want to label it. Because the average person in a relationship believes that they're in a

situation where they have control over someone. So of course, if you're in a relationship where you feel like you own someone and you have dominion, over whatever they do with their bodies. Of course you're going to call that cheating, but but we're not. We're not playing games here, Devil's advocate, because I feel like everyone that's listening is like this nuts. Well, yeah, it's gonna sound crazy. You want to know why are because the average person out here doesn't think as well.

But I do. Relationship. I'm really trying to like stay on the same track here. I don't even ship the person I'm going to someone else. I think that has nothing to do with what we have and you and you are thinking the correct way, but I can't tell you that. I don't call someone being lied to and

like sleeping behind someone's back cheating. So like that's where I'm confused, because this is something that works for me and you, but to someone else that it doesn't work for it for two people that are consenting that they just want to be the only ones. Then what what about monogamous people? Well, for monogamous people, So we are we only talking about in terms of people that are

non monogamous. See, this is the thing. If you are a person that wants to be monogamous, and you and your partner have an agreement that Oh, we're only going to be with each other. That's completely fine. But the question is are you subscribing to love or do you care more about the form, who you do, what with,

where you go all that stuff. Because if love is the main thing that's holding you together, whether you are in a monogamous relationship or not, it should not matter what someone else does with someone else because love cannot be threatened. There is nothing that can ever be done, nothing you can ever do with anyone else that will threaten the love that you and your partner have for each other. I believe, however, But is it argues ascribing to ego if you are going behind your partner's back

and being sneaky and and doing things. No, of course you are, because you're forgetting love in that moment. If you love your partner, open communication that that should, that should. It's probably more so the communication that if you're lying and you're being deceitful, cheating like greed, jealousy, those things

come from fear right fears of the ego. If you love your partner, you know that even if they went out there and fucked a thousand digs or sucked a thousand pussies, like it's not going to change the love that they have for you. But at the same time, it's like, in the midst of that, can you still see your partner as the loving person that you trust even if they decide to go and flex their autonomy because whether you guys have this contract or not, they're

still free. Now that's the whole thing, Like can you stay for you? So how does it work in your relationship where you just said like I don't own and blah blah blah and these things that are true. How did you feel when he's with someone else? Do you need to know? Are there are any rules that you have? No? Why do I need to know about where he's going and what he's doing? What with Like I don't, I don't,

So what do you track his movements? When he's like, oh, I'm going out the house, so I'm going out the house to help my mother. I'll be back. I don't question that. But then as soon as he's going out the house to be with somebody else that's not a mother or a friend, now I'm supposed to jump down his throat and ask him where he's going and what he's doing for what? So what commitment is what is your commitment to each other? Then, because a lot of people feel feel like so you do, so you don't

need anything else? Is there anything? There's not? So for example, like a lot of things that I need personally, And maybe it is my ego or in an insecurity, but I like, you know you're married. I'd feel like I would need someone to know when someone's home with me, Like I would want to know if I was going to come home and someone wasn't there, that's very important to me, or if they make a plan. I feel

like to me, it's at least consider it. So how do you Because you're saying you don't feel like you owe any of that, No, I'm not. He does. He does not owe me an explanation, But you're the primary partner. No, I'm I'm one of his partners and we just happen to be married. So you don't use the word primary at all. No, because he has many partners in his life, even though as a wife, he still don't think primary is a good word. Why. I mean, look, yeah, I'm

married to this man because we've chosen to be. But just because I have this title of wife now doesn't change anything about the love that has anything to change about the stuff like we talked about. When we don't we don't write. I know you don't have Now does that title change or um? Are you open about your title with him when you have other partners? Do you

have other partners as well? Yeah, I just told you we like all of our partners are not just sexual and he's limited to the sexual partners then, because that's where I think a lot of our listeners don't understand. People get completely confused because people put more importance on

sex over love. So and this is where people get themselves fucked up in love most of the time, because you're placing more emphasis on form, which is sex, which in itself doesn't mean anything because sex can be used, uh for violence, and sex can also be used to heal and to join together. But people use something that is completely meaningless in itself to harm themselves in separation, separating themselves from the next person simply because oh, you've

had sex with someone else. Are sexual partners. I don't know how many he has. He could have a thousand. I don't ask him that because it doesn't matter to me. And the same with me, like I have other sexual partners. But does he ask me about them? No, so you don't even share anything, So like, well, how does it happen? I mean, because you you look together, he's your husband. I'm sure you talk and that's probably your best friend, right, So when does the conversation start to happen? How do

you learn about each other's other partners? We don't because it doesn't matter unless we bring it up. But you don't when it only matters if those people are joining with us for a purpose. If it's just sex, that's purposeless. You're just bumping. But you're saying not even just sexual partners? Like when I mean, meet someone knew that's great and you start seeing them, Like, at what point do you share? Is that too much to share? Like whenever we feel

like when do we feel like it? Like I don't ever press him because he meets so many people on the street, and he's an author and he always pushes his books, so whenever he meets somebody, the first thing he's doing is, hey, I wrote this book about love. You know, I'll give you a free copy. Whatever. Well, I asked from the standpoint of like, um, so I know if you polyamorous couples and I'm not polyamorous. We're

just not monogamous. But there's times where he'll say to me, like, I met this girl and he's excited to tell me about it, or like the experience with it. How does that work for you? Do you, I mean, do you guys do that or do you feel like it's sometimes too much or it's not something that's we acquired. So if he meets somebody and he's had an experience and he wants to share it with me, he does, but

it's not a requirement for him or for me. Sometimes we're out and we both meet people at the same time, you know, and then we'll engage with them and stuff like that. But it legit is not a requirement for advice for people that have been considering this but they're worried about peus purpose that that's the whole thing. If you do not set a purpose with the person that you're in a relationship, why are we together? Where is

this going? Then all the other stuff that pops up from the ego because you believe that you own somebody, that stuff is going to destroy it by default. Because if you do not set a purpose intentionally for a partnership, then your relationship is just going to be running on default and eventually all the stuff that we see that plague the average person in their relationship is going to come in. It's inevitable and it's going to sink your ship.

Have another question, A lot of people do this when they are feeling like they're on the edge and they need something else. Do you think that this is something that can save a relationship? Um only with purpose? Right because listen, because a lot of people do it when they're super in love and they feel like they want to open their hearts more to other people and whatever and have experiences and whatever. But some people feel like this is the end, We're going to have to do this.

That's the wrong people. Yeah, if people go into being open, which is really think about it. Naturally, as animals, we are not monogamous, and there's two different types of monogamy. Is social monogamy and then also a sexual monogamy. But just because you choose to be with one person, because that's it's really a choice, doesn't mean you're attraction cuts off you know, and yours and we all naturally develop relationships, right like right now, we have a relationship because we're

in here talking relating to each other. So you can't stop that, which means you can't even stop you can't stop thoughts going through your head. Because think about this. When you meet somebody, first thing you think, well, I funk this person, right thin normal. Even if you subscribe to monogamy and you choose that, it's not going to turn off that innate quality to want to join with other people. That's natural. But again it's all about the purpose.

Whether you want to be non monogamous, polyamorous, all of that set the purpose with every single last person you're in a relationship with, so then you know that okay, Like, for instance, my partner and I our purpose, we have a few different things underneath our purpose. One of them is to remember our innocence and to never attack each other. Another one is to laugh and play together. Another one is to heal with each other so um oh, and

to always remember who each other is in love. So because we have these staples now of our for our purpose, whenever we do start feeling that stuff coming up from our ego, we go right back to why we were together in the first place, and it serves as an anchor in our ship to keep us focused no matter where some things like that maybe not as um as each other or maybe in different ways. But people saying

that need to have an anchor. That's really good. And I think, um, so it's funny speaking of um, I guess regular people. We have home mail from one of our let's question. Yeah, I feel like it should change it always. I feel like it's something people would want to know. Because you mentioned his big thing right now, fun the home mail. Think we can get to him.

We got you today. So you said you're his wife, and you're and you also said that you're not as primary so like and and then discussed how you don't really need the labels. Then why get married? Well, I mean we just wanted to take the taxes. Well not even that what in your mind wanted to display? People feel like they don't need it. It serves no purpose. Yeah, I mean in itself it doesn't. But also you gotta

remember that marriage starts whatever purpose you give it. So for us, our purpose and being together is to be reflections of each other and reminders to each other of who we are in love and in God. So our marriage isn't about like joining our money. I mean we already did that the moment we met. You know, everything

became one from the moment we started being together. For us, it's like, we know that the world has this perception of marriage, right and with us being love advocates and love educators were like, we're gonna get married and we're gonna use our marriage as an example of what can be because people don't believe marriage can be perfect. People don't believe that marriage can just be free and open without you needing all this other stuff to try to define it. Like you do what you wanna do, you

don't do what you wanna, don't want to do. You have a purpose that binds you together and you leave it at that, and communication, trust, all that stuff is like built into that. But um, we're using our marriage as a display of what can be. So it's not about whatever whyever anyone else gets married or their purpose. We have a very specific intention and purpose for why we're doing what we're doing because in the past I was likely to be married, like you know, I never

and he too. Oh tomorrow it will be nine months, yeah, and two days married. We have been married going on a week on Saturday. Is how quids together? Um? We he gave me keys the first time I came to New York to stay with him. He's like, you're laying down next to somebody, You're sticking. You're dicking somebody. You can't give them keys in your place. Don't don't think like that, because girl, what do you made me feel bad? I don't one of them talking? You know, all right,

just don't talk, just sticking in. I've been there, so I guess, um, we'll get into our home mail. Um, and this is one that I picked specifically for you because as we're talking about labels, this is kind of of things she's in search for and ask for our opinion. So it says, Hi, Mandy and wheezy, I'm in the situation ship to end all situation ships. The guy that I have been seeing. Um, oh, I'm sorry, I just slawt it the guy have been seeing. And I gotta

start proof reading these, y'all gotta start write and write. Um. We have been together quote unquote for almost two years. He came into my life during an extremely hard time in my life and has stuck around with me through some very hard family situations. He acts like my boyfriend, takes me on dates, sleeps over my house where I live with my mother four to five times a week.

We don't talk to slash other people, and he asked me to cut off my ex completely, not I'm followed, not I'm follow on social media, but stop sending him occasional text because it makes him uncomfortable. He is even planning on buying my mom and brother Christmas presents. For some reason, he still will not make me his girlfriend. Most people try to tell me it's just because he's

not that into me, but I'm not going alive. I'm a bit crazy and I don't really get why he would stick around through my psychotic episodes, not to mention the crazy ship that has happened with my family and the fact that he has cut off all the other girls for me and barely goes out and lives his single life. Like I said, we stay in four to five nights a week at my house, watching Netflix, but

still not wife me. He told me a few weeks ago that he was afraid to tell me his real insecurities and hesitations to being in a relationship because he was afraid I would look at him differently and not want to be with him anymore. I'm afraid of what that might mean. I want to hear his real reasons, but I'm scared of what he's going to say. I also don't want to rock the boat because I'll be honest, I'm in love with him and don't want to ruin

our relationship. I know he has some some hang ups from his last relationship, but I just don't get what he could be so serious that, after two years and countless hurdles we've crossed, he won't consider me his real girlfriend. Is it time to try to move on? Or do I continue trying to make this happen because I already have so much invested sincerely never gonna get wife. I wonder if she's happy. So yeah, thank you for even saying that, because the real question is here, what are

you more concerned about? It sounds like the title the title or the content meaning the love, because clearly this man loves her. If you're doing all these things you're doing for her, She's in a situation ship, which is a relationship. You know, it's just um, it would be considered an open relationship. But what's funny is it seems it appears that they've both cut you know, extra people

out of there. Now it's sounding like they are sexually monogamous. Okay, fine, but the real question is again, what matters more the title or the content? Doesn't matter more that he has a label for you? Or does it matter more that he's there for you and supports you and spending time with you. And also too had this conversation also too, Yeah, and then once I end up like, oh, you want me to be your boyfriend? I was like, you know what, I don't know. But then too, that's the whole point.

So she's so caught up and being the girlfriend, but what is your purpose? Right? Because she's even to the point where she's like should I leave him? And it's like, you're really going to leave him over just a title. It was a video that came out on Twitter or Instagram where a girl was talking about why we need the title so bad if things don't change, and saying

that it's this thing of commitment in our minds. And you know, the person I'm dating I had wanted that so bad and at one point he was like, I don't know why, and then he said, fine, do you want me to be your boyfriend? And like, is that it? And then when I heard it, it was just like it sounded crazy because you don't have a real purpose, but why you even want to be and and I think that um something that in my mind made me

feel more important, which was ridiculous. Yeah, because there there really is no level of importance and love, like love just is and everybody is the same, and love treats everybody the same. I mean, if you wanted that back, why don't you ask him to be your boyfriend? Right? Like That's kind of where I think, Yeah, it's funny because after we just delve into how deep relationships are in free love and what love is, reading this back is just like, you just sound crazy right now. You

sound like I can't because I've been there. She was definitely there, like and you know, and my friends would say, well, he's never gonna do it, and Mandy would say he's never gonna meet and Mandy got to fight about it, and I it took me time to realize and stopped listening to other people for what they know men to do, to just think like, but it was even me telling you that serious that he's not giving you that title.

And I would yell at her because it would be like, you just want him to tell you you're you're with him, you're sleeping with him, y'all are open your communications wanting to go be with him? Why are you so strong on this title of boyfriend? And we literally talk to think it's just a societal norm. It is just one of the days. There were times that I didn't know what to call him, and then once the mom meeting happened,

I was like, wait, what do you know? My boy were not don't know when it was just like my mama had to tell me to get out my head. Yeah, yeah, when when it's funny. I always mentioned this to my therapist. He says, one of the things that you feel like you're in and go with And that was one of the things I mentioned to him, and he's like, why

why do you care? And it's a purpose And I think that a lot of women will say that if a man won't call you this, and a lot of people, a lot of men will say this to their girl friends or whatever and say, if he won't make you a girl, he doesn't give a funk, or he just wants to be single and be open, and this man is free to do what he wants to do. And guess what even if it was you want to know the beauty and that and having the power of decision.

When he does decide and choose to be with you, that's a gift because guess what, he can be with anybody he wants to be with at any given time. But if he's choosing to spend time with you, that means that he actually wants to be there. Right you know, your presence is a gift in anybody's life. Your presence is a gift in anyone's life, and that's how you have to look at it. This is why people start taking each other for granted, because you assume that they

are entitled to be there. Simply because you have these romantic feelings towards each other, or because you're fucking each other, or because you get text messages every day and spend time with each other and eat together every day, you assume that this is an obligation now, all because you have this contract through sex or monogamy, whatever. But in reality,

we all have power of decision at any time. You don't want to be with who you're with or with who you're with, you can just leave block at any time right now. But because you because you consciously choose to show up and be present with that person. It is a gift. And when you can think of it like that, you will stop taking the people in your

life for granted. And also like raise up your own self esteem and realizing like, oh wait, sh it, I ain't gonna be here, especially when it is happening that doesn't make you feel comfortable in this situation with this guy. It doesn't sound like he's done anything or say anything too hard to make her feel like, um, not loved. It seems like he's a very loving guys there with you.

It is probably friends. Even it might be her friends nagging her like so you just gonna have this nigga all up in your house for five times a week and Joe, man, it's probably it could be that. And I think a lot of our listeners need to realize that they don't even This image doesn't need to be created for everyone outside your relationship and who you deal with, because girl, everyone keep asking me about seven. I like our relationship and what it is. I don't need him

with my boyfriend. And we talked even for like an hour last night, like before I wrote a dick, and it was just like the first time of three. It wasn't gonna happen often. Um, but we even we openly talked about it, and he was like, he called me a rare breed, and I was like, I know because he's like just certain other relationships that he's had. And that's exactly when you're when you're open like that and you're honest, right and you give him that freedom, yeah,

you will find that he's around more. Why I cut around for four years exactly? You want to know why, because you're not doing the clink clink ship that every person. And we openly talked about that, and he was like,

we just had a brief conversation about it. But I was like, and he started saying everything I was telling my friends, and I was like, Nick, you've seen everything I've been trying to tell my friends because they're all asking me why I'm not trying to make you my boyfriend, and I'm like, I like what we have like and you've been around. You're there when I need you for what I need you for, and we have fun. We

enjoy each other's company, and that's it. That's what I want you guys should like today and tomorrow or whatever, just at of purpose, the purpose could be to have fun and play together, eyes out of each other, boom, and then you know, there you go. You got you got something that's rooting you in the relationship with him. But yeah, I mean, people put way too much emphasis

on the titles. One of the things people are doing the time spending all that time that someone's got a husband out there with a beautiful house and kids in their miserable Yeah. Absolutely, married, Mary's just not marriage. Just not. Do you feel different in the last two days? Are we? The only thing that I feel different about is just my commitment. You always remember who he is. You know what she's gonna feel that a difference. Tax time is

coming up. You got to see the difference. Well, see, you know, I kind of know what happens with taxes, and that's gonna be we both owned, you know, businesses and stuff like that. So he said, we'll cross that bridge. Because he even told me, he said, you can put whatever you want on your taxes, married or single, it doesn't matter. I'm like, okay, well, well that kind of has coming to grants because you can't put he puts married.

I mean, you know all that stuff. I was like, I got a c p a for that ship and then I let him lead. It's like, that's that's what I'm about to be girl. All right. Yeah, so our other guys is here, but I'm gonna go ahead and ask you this last question because I wanted to ask you, and it's a little bit off um relationships, but it's something that I know you're good at. This is what the your bitch sex work. Um. My question is about

the spark in a relationship, so not the actual relationship. Um. When I first got with my wife, we talked about doing all kinds of freaky things, and over the course of the years, she's become a prude, no moral no watching porn, no masturbation. We have sex once a month, and I feel like it's me who is to blame. We've had issues with infidelity on both ends, hers and mine, and we even attempted having an open relationship, but it

was only to her benefit. So my question is how do I get my freak back that I once had? By the way, I love y'all and wish I could have a show as amazing as y'all's. Well, thank you, um, and I actually said we're gonna say this was Taomi, So well they got to start over. And starting over, you gotta remember first of all that each both of

you are innocent. You know, she went out did what she wanted to do because she wanted to do that, and it had nothing to do with her not loving him, but everything to do with whatever was going on in her head and she chose to do same thing with him. Okay, fine, but now they literally have to go back to square one because guess what, this woman is not the same woman that you met first. And okay, you're saying that

it be infidelity, whatever, have a conversation. How about have an honest hearts or heard conversation about what's going on, because there is nothing that anyone can do to you or say that it's going to make you react or respond a certain way. It's how you perceive what that person has said or done, unless start physically attacking you. There is nothing that anyone can do to harm you, not what they do with someone else's body or not whatever.

So really it's in her. She's in her own head and whatever she's going through right now, she has to overcome that. Yeah, this is a guy wanting his wife to to open back up. So is there anything I

know you deal with couples. Um, what would you tell a mail that is something maybe he could do maybe aside from communication or I mean talk that they need to that they need to buy my husband's book Love Is Not a Game and they need to read that together and they need to go back Yeah, they need to go back in and really re established the purpose

for why they're together. What can someone This sounds so terrible the way I'm wordering it, but like what can someone pay you for like life coaching type of things? Like It's so when I work with couples, it really is like it's basically talk based coaching and then sometimes it's, uh, it can involve touch and stuff. It just depends on what we're working on. Like if a couple wants to learn different sex positions and stuff, then of course touching

will be involved. But I don't have sex with clients like that, That's not what I do. Um, but everything is the things that you've said, a lot of people want to reach out to you. So that's why they can totally reach out to me. You just just got to know that I don't have sex with clients, and yeah, yeah we're not We're not Yoming is not coming over and giving you a ride session. I'll give you a ride session by teaching you the moves and then you can do it. If you want to have sex in

front of me, you can do that as well. But I'm not think that's what King Nora does. He helps and gets couples right before they're about to have sex. That's what he said he does as well. I mean, but he's also a point star. I mean, you can't not be a port. So can you do something like almost like therapy, like talking, like counseling type of things

like that? Do we not? Him and I together We coach couples and I coach couple solo as well, And it's mainly talk based, just like any other form of therapy, but it's really focused on sexuality. But what it was interesting is that it always turns out to be more than that. It's not even this about the sex. It's like your health. You know, people's health has a lot to do with where they are sexually and how they feel their libido. It's uh, environmental factors, sociological factors, it's

all this stuff that incompass. When she said that the girl that wrote in about us bothering her. We'll give that read later. Okay, we don't have to read it whole. Anyways, I appreciate you so much for coming out. I feel like we'll be like bright and again we need you were late. I was like, oh my god, we're gonna I'm gonna hating her and now you're like, oh, we got to bring her back on and f I was like, I was just like, it's okay, CP. Time it happens.

It really asking you questions together. If we can do that, He goes in, Yeah, if we can get both here, it'll show strength within a relationship like I've been in a nominalis relationship with well I used the word tryad but we didn't live together anything. But I think that people always think this thing is one sided, like one person. So I would love to. Yeah, we'll have to set it up again, maybe to get him in here, and especially just hearing from a man how he would allow

you to have other partners. We do have a lot of male listeners, and so to hear that, you know, let's go. Um. So, anyways, where can our listeners find you? I mean half of them already know who you is, because that's how we found. I love your family, But where can they find you? On Twitter? Instagram? Um, your website? Yeah, so my website is expert Tyomi dot com. The teas are separate, they don't share a tea. Um, you can find me on Twitter, Glamazon, Tyomi, Instagram, the Glamazon Tyomi.

I have catfish pages, so make sure you put the front. You know you're big when you got catfish pages. It's crazy. Snapchack Glamazon Tyomi. If you want to see more like risk stuff can go in Yes, yes, Gamaz, glamor Rai, Glemazon, Tyomi dot tumbler dot com and you can easually just put Glemazon, tyomie and Google. We can found all this, all of this ship pop up. I'm telling you, I did my research. I was like, damn, she got YouTube videos like it's all on there. Um go check out

the writing video on YouTube. It's pretty dot com slag glamor Rotica one o one. There you go. Um and again, thank you so much for you've been You You got me feeling like where had my ineen? I wanted a relationship. Now I gotta think of how I wanted. We're not not buying, like what is my purpose. You know, that's something that to find have on one to where I'm like,

did we just quit our own show? No? Good, like he didn't the toys like, oh yeah, girl, if you know stuff about if you know stuff about toys, maybe we could do one with you as well. Yeah I didn't. Yeah, I got you. I got you. Girls that we haven't tested this yet. It just came mind you and people to talk about. Not yeah if they sent them for us to yeah, um shoving our proceeds, So I guess again. Thank you for coming on. Guys, reach out to her.

We're gonna put all of her information in the description of this bio, and you could also find all of her information when we post her on the Horrible Decisions page that is at Horrible Underscore Decisions. You can follow me at full Court Pumps. You can follow this hole at we can see what the funk she's just not gonna say because she hates me. Thank you, guys. This has been yet another episode of Horrible Decisions. Bye bye,