Ep170: A Fight Worth Fighting

am a little better now. I have been out protesting here in New York City, and I just want to give shout outs to everyone who has done their part, for those of you who have been out protesting, for those of you who have donated, for those of you voting and telling your peers to vote. I just want to thank you all. Um. Of course, y'all know we talk a lot about sex and just a whole bunch of raunchiness, and right now we just kind of felt that, how how do we do that? How do we do

that right now? How do we get through the laughs

and the jokes and all of these things? And so we and I decided that for this week's episode we would compile, um, just some previous conversations over the last three and a half years that we have had regarding our experience and trauma with police brutality, with racism, with interracial dating with UM our white listeners UM and their white privilege coming to us about certain topics, and also even a conversation we had on our Patreon regarding the

use of the in word within the Latino community. UM. As you guys know, this fight is not anything new from the sixties to the seventies, for centuries and centuries or two now, we have been fighting the same fight, and we wanted to let you guys know that outside of fighting for the comfortable altity and making everyone within the sex space in the black community more comfortable, that

we have brought many topics to the forefront. And I just wanted to kind of resurface and and relive some of these moments that Weezy and I have shared on this platform with bringing certain injustices and certain topics to to light once again. During this time again, I want to give a an R I P as well as a fight for justice for George Floyd mad are Y and more important, most importantly UM in my eyes and for this specific platform Brianna Taylor as having a platform

specifically focused I would say for black women. UM. I think this has brought a hard time for all of us. UM. And seeing that we are all standing strong in the fight for black men, but kind of you know, a little fear and if we will get the same fight as black women. UM, Sandra Bland. There's there's a lot of just cases reopening up, UM that involved black women, and I do feel like black women are not kind of given the same voice. And that's what this platform does.

We want to continue to give voices to black women. UM. And and again, I just want to thank you guys for all of your kind words. UM. This next clip that you were about to hear, UM goes into what I mentioned during my statement UM in the PTSD that I feel like I have experienced over the last few years with witnessing black men being taken at the hands of police officers. And so here it is UM me talking about my experience in London and how I I was able to realize that I am fucking affected by

this ship. UM again, UM, go ahead and listen. And I don't want to say I hope you enjoy, but let's go ahead and relive these moments over the past years of horrible decisions. UM. So I wanted to, I guess share a story because this opened up, UM. Something to me so while while I was in London, I did London and Paris in a weekend. Because I'm looking crazy.

I was drunk the whole time. But first off, I felt how rich I was too, because which we spent probably four dollars in food just on the Friday, between food and drinks, and I don't even eat a lot. That was sucking crumpets and fucking dump dumplings and dim sum and ship. Yeah, we went to the shard. It's a it's a restaurant called Hu Tongue on the top of the shard. Beautiful was drinking porn Star Martinez the whole time. Let me a porn so a fucking good then,

I love just drinking. My ship's so good. I don't know what the point start is, by the way, so's I don't know why. It's like only in Europe. I've never been offered a point start in the state here. Yet you can make it. I asked the ingredients fun it's pomegranted, it's super sweet, passion for you, sorry, passion for to sitting in there, super juicy, and then you get a shot of champagne next to it. Is that champagne and maybe you was that it was prosecco champagne.

You just ain't know. You saw a little bubbls got excited. That's what that was. No, But so anyways, we went to sketch and then we had dinner reservations at Novikov and my homegirl Adriana shout out to her she had um us on the guest list because she was like, she didn't really want to be around Nick. She wanted to meet new niggas, so she was like, I got us on the guest list. Hillsted us at the table and I'm like, bitch, I don't do promoter tables even

in the States, but okay, I'm in another country. I'll do it. So instead of catching an uber to the club, one of the dudes that really like her right now was like, yo, I'll pick y'all up and drop y'all off at the club. And in her eyes, she's like, well now, bitch, we ain't gotta pay for an uber seeing real innocent right wrong, he picks us up from the fucking dinner. We go like, I guess I'll share

the whole story because but I'll make it short. We drove about fifteen minutes away and we noticed We're still in the car. The club is only about five minutes around the corner type ship. So we're like, what direction are we going in? Because my friend is not recognizing the direction we're going in. This nigga is like, nah, I gotta go pick something up. No, my nigga. I

hopped out of the car so quick. I said, ma'am, we're calling an uber because what you're not gonna do is pick anything up while I'm in the car with you. And there was Nigerian's no shade. But you either a businessman or you're a scama or a street nigga. Whatever you are, you're going to pick something up, you ain't having it in a car with me because I know what it is. Yeah, out of goddamn weed and you need to go pick it up. But it's now now to me, that's a run. I'm not coming with you

on your runs. So I hop out the car and he's like, nah, baby, girl, wouldn't do that to you. Da man, get back in, Okay, I'll take you out to the club. We get around the corner from the club, that's the sound of the police. We get pulled over, but it's a van. Fine. Police jump out of the fucking van. Niggas literally knock on the window, ask him to pull it down. He pulled it down. He's being very like, respectable high officer was the problem because we

did we did absolutely nothing wrong. So he rolls it down and he's like, where are y'all going tonight? D Can I ask all of you guys to step out of the car. Police we're literally on literally and I'm just I'm looking at my homegirl like, bitch, I told you to get you see if you would have listened to me, bitch, And I'm looking at my homegirl like, bitch, what the funk is going on? Next thing? I know she's a German citizen. I'm a U. S. Citizen. They take both of our my pastport her I D card

and I'm like, what you need? Like here it is, I can give you my information what you need my card for. She takes it. She's like, oh, as long as we don't find anything in the vehicle, will give it back. They have two police officers, all doors open, trunk open, flashlight looking under everything, and I'm just looking at her and I'm ting she told me that that's what I said. That tag is marked and whether it's for drugs or whatever. They're looking to get that nig

Mercedes nice heart. He's telling it's because I'm black. His windows tended ain't see you was black from behind it. So I'm literally looking at Adriana and I said, I don't think you understand money. My friend is much younger than me. This is her first time experience. She's twenty too. That has happened to me before. So I'm looking at her and I'm just like, you don't under stand, Adriana. If they find as little as a blunt in that car,

we are all going to jail. So I'm sitting here talking to the other officer and um, and I'm just like, listen, I don't even know these motherfucker's. I just landed today. You could look at the passports. I was, bro, I don't know these people, Like she just met him a month ago, and it's because he drove by a light there, Like, bro, we all know these niggs like that. And I'm literally

like trying to say, I don't they. Then I was like they, technically she's just sitting with somebody, you know, now, I think that's pretty much bitch. And I was like they technically are Uber driver. Then I almost got away. He was like, oh, is this an Uber driver? I said, technically, but we didn't call on the UBERT so they wasn't trying to buy that. So they're still looking. So this is where a few things happened to me, and this is what I wanted to share with with the listeners.

So he starts getting the other money. There's two niggas one in the van. I'll know. This is another reason why I got scared. As we're all pulled out, the drivers already handcuffed, and I'm just looking like Mitch White he did in handcuffs. So as yeah, as he's in handcuffs, they're questioning us. He's trying to say sorry to her. But now he's starting to get slick with the cops. And this is where I realized, and I didn't realize how much I had been affected, that I have PTSD

from what's going on here in the States. And as he's starting to get snappy with the officer, I'm yelling at him at this point, like do exactly what he says, stop with the smart mouth, stop getting slick, give him whatever he wants. Let's wait till the car is searched. Stop talking to him like that, like I'm literally telling yeah,

So I'm by the way. I only mentioned that because like in France, and he went to France, they were big rifles to not in France yellow jackets is a big protesting thing going on, but they shoot out these metal kind of balls. They're not they can't kill you, but they'll like maybe knock off something. But in London they do have guns. So so he's I mean, I was, I was just I was thinking, well, at this point, I was already coming up with how I was going

to have my locked up a broad episode. I was already thinking like content, I was already us do you know that's what the fun My friend said as soon as I fucking told her in the car, let me get back to the sorry, so I can tell you how I was crying like a pussy. So finally they find nothing. In the car, we get our, I d s back, I said, he joan. We walk into the globo. I said, oh, British, I have no gun. No gun, So I'm sorry. I apologize. That means that's why he

was talking. Maybe that's why he was talking. I thought that I thought that the UK was one of the own having guns. Okay, okay, that's why they're always like six people taking someone out. Well, sorry, said there was six cops well in this car at once, so we're all getting there's two check in the car, there's two questioning, So that's he's talking slick to the one officer and the other officers with us. So finally they come back and they're like, okay, nothing's been found in the car.

They give us our passport and I d back and we start walking away. I'm like, Adriana, we'veen the motherfucking walks to the club. So we walked back. They let him go as well. They uncuff him, and he comes running to us at the end of the sidewalk trying to apologize, saying he's sorry, And all I do is burst into tears and I stay back home. They kill y'all, And that's all I kept saying, because he was so like, getting so snappy with him, and I just did not want to be a part of like I'm about to

cry now. They were like, you're so pussy, but I literally was like I didn't realize how much seeing all these black men die from the police affected me because I don't put myself in those situations. And to be in that situation like I'm literally like I literally had to tell my mom I said, I think I need

therapy now. Like I didn't realize that me seeing the videos on Instagram, me reading the news articles and seeing how many of our black men die, being in that situation right there, I was just like I was scared for him. I was scared for me because I know they looked at were black women, so I know they wanted all of us gone, and I didn't realize how

it affected me. So before I go to cry, I go to say, this is why I realized when we talk about dealing with hood niggas, street niggas, scammers, this is why I know I don't put myself in those positions because truth is many. The sad thing about it is it ain't gonna take a hood No, no, it's not gonna take ni gonna die. However, my friend just got a new job, I said, just because we were in the car with them, this would have affected your

new job. I said, do you think if I would have just called my my my job and said, oh, by the way, I'm in jail right now for drugs because that's what they have me in here under wait till I get out. No, I would have lost my job. And so even it's something that and this is a tip to you ladies who if you're into men who may sell narcotics or carry around large loads of narcotics or anything that could cause him to go to jail, don't get in the car read listen back to that might.

I just add that it doesn't even matter at this point if you are writing with anybody with drugs UM. At this point, my tip is to just be safe when you walk out of your door. UM. We have seen black men taken from US for selling cigarettes, for being accused of using a counterfeit ten dollar bill. Um. We have seen people lose their lives for sitting in

their living room. UM. So even with that experience, and of course me feeling as though we were being pulled over for a drug related offense, UM, because that's what they were searching for in the vehicle. Literally, just to know you can be pulled over for driving wall black. UM. So again this is just this is all a lot. We know it's a lot. UM. And this next clip you're about to hear, UM, actually comes from of a place of frustration. UM, we have this podcast as black

as fuck for a reason. We have not shied away from that. Again, shout out to our twenty seven white listeners. But this show is for us UM. And so in the next clip, you are about to hear wheezy kind of read for filth um, someone who felt offended that we made this platform for us UM. And you can kind of hear pretty much both of our sentiments on our thoughts on that. Shout out to our favorite one of our favorite podcasts to read. Okay, we you know, we gotta read. We never really go off on anybody.

And Mandy replied to this girl and she is very lucky. I'm not gonna say her name, but I'm just going to try to all right, I'm still I'm so irritated because I just remembered about this. So this girl writes in UM on a picture of Lisa spliffs in who came and if you guys got to hear that episode, She's a finndom who Michelle Hope describes very radical. She had a lot of opinions. She used the word white supremacy a lot, and UM had a lot of anger. She's been violated in a lot of ways, so she

told her story. Anyway, Here is the comment that please don't are you going to read it all? Okay, I'm pretty bad. Okay, still listen to this. Tried it and then y'all can come up with your own opinion. I think I think that we is overreacting. Um I I responded in a fine way, like you responded the way that you should have nicely, and I'm not No, you did what you should have done. We should be taking Listen, I'll tell you if this episode listen to the comment

thank you? Can I get my black card back? Because Mandy about to lose. I'm talking about I'm overreacting. Bus listening this episode, nipple car back with that top. Well, I don't let them show, let them blow. It's very hot in here, which is why my tips are out. I had a sweatshirt on. Alright, alright, read this episode made me sick to my stomach. Forget the ignorance and prejudice that was pouring out of it. As a all caps white child sexual harassment victim, I'm telling you this.

Take your explanation of child abuse with white supremacy, wrap it in a gift paper that didn't make sense and put it on the shelf never open again. I don't think you realize you're denying women to their own experience. Women of all colors body shamed by men of all colors. The oppression of women's stems largely, when She's right on this,

from men's desire for power and control. The same need which throughout history is driven men to try to conquer and subjugate other groups nations, and oppress other classes and groups in their own society, drives them to dominate an oppressed women. Since men feel they need to gain as much power and control as they can, they can steal away power and control from women. They deny women the right to make decisions so that they can make it for them, leave women unable to direct their own lives

so they can do it for them. This is really long, guy on that part, Right, do do do all? Right? Since biological processes like sex, menstruation, breastfeeding, and even pregnancy we're discussing, women felt themselves disgusted too, and that brings me me to the sexual power that brings them to the sexual power women have over men. Men resent that feeling. It's a sign of weakness and women out to blame as they're the one to produce it, and that means

men can't complete the domination over women. They may be able to force women to cover their bodies and faces like slaves, but any woman that's capable of arousing powerful and uncontrollable sexual impulses inside them at any moment. I got your call. I got that you call your podcast a black podcast, but you are so exclusive it hurts me on a socio economic level. Mandy reply turns that everyone has their own experiences. We've had many different people

in the show. Sorry, police's experience is different from your own. Perhaps will have someone in the show that shares your views. I just want to all you something. I was read it and I got irritated, and I thought about the words socio economic and how has this impacted your money, or your job or your livelihood, because let's take it for a second. You love to capitalize that you were white, So on a socio economic level, how the fund did

you get offended economically? I mean, really, when black podcasts are the minority, black people are the minority, what the funk are you? How are you really affected by hearing a black girl tell her fucking struggle, and then here you are are these white fucking tears about how you're left out, how the fund did Lisa feel her whole fucking life, or every fucking black girl that goes through ship, even especially if it's with the white man and someone saying, oh, hey,

you know it's okay, get over it. But now we got a cater to your motherfucking white ass on our black ass podcast, because god forbid, we have some black bitch on here talking about somebody looks like, Yo, daddy, know the funk? You didn't, And if it's such a problem, you should have ever have ever have followed our black asses, half black asses, whatever the funk you want to say, I haven't indulged. Didn't even bring it up. You sound dumb. I know it's a black podcast, but I'm hurt fit

Shut the funk up. Do you know how many black girls have been heard? Do you know how many black girls were feeling Lisa not to mention how I was embarrassed that we had black men on here talking about Spanish women and how they're better. Do you know how many black girls were hurting? And where the funk were you? You weren't offended because your hair is good too. Fuck you out of fact, Monica, Marika, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. Most of the girls

that are finndoms are white. Do you know how many black ones are there? Not a fucking lot. Not a fucking lot. She's feticized for being black, being big, being whatever, and here you are being hurt on a socio economic level. What does that even fucking mean? Did this podcast really take you away from work for the day because you were so fucked up? Anything that you listen to is catered towards you, is cater to your demographic. And one fucking black girl, I swear to God, like it all.

She was this man, Yeah, this is a podcast for people look like And if I'm sorry because I feel like we've always like we ride for any fucking woman. But here are having to tear this bitch us a new asshole for having the nerve to bring another black bitch on our black ass podcast. Bit, you're gonna have to go and if it fucking sacrifices me the whole listener away, That's what she said. I don't roll the whole listener away. We just because you know what I

told Mandy. When I started this show that I didn't want it to be a black podcast, wanted it to be inclusive of everyone. If that's what we had to do, that's what we had to do, because if you can't sit and listen to a black girl tell her feelings, then but you've gotta go, you gotta throw the whole person away. Fuck it, leave her one star review, suck my dick, you can kiss my ass. I don't even

know Lisa. I never spoke to her again, but I can tell you this, I get it, and bitch a lot of other white people that listen to it got it. And no one sa out there and said, oh my god, she's talking so much about white people and can't stand the lean and I'm so a fed that bitch. Maybe she was offended when you sat there and said you were hurt on a socio economic level. Bitch, How the fund did it affect you? I know you are so happy you got that ship out. That's all I had

to say. And that was the read for today. Shout out to Crystal and Kid fury Um. This was her read, and I think that they would approve of this message, actually meant it, and mind you This is coming from someone with a white ass daddy, the fox white man words with white people, has friends that are white. I'm offended on a socio economic level. Bit, you took me out my goddamn job. I might lose money from our show.

On an economic level from Talking Shop. You had all the nerve to do that ship on our goddamn Instagram and you're lucky bitch that man you wrote your ass back right. That's why I'm not taking that loss out of my money anyway. I'm done anyways. UM. So, yeah, guys that this is your first time listening, I promised this doesn't happen. And often She's just really angry about a comment that we received from one of our listeners.

And I think it's good that, UM we expressed this. Um. We show you guys so much love and we appreciate all the love that you guys have given us. However, even on the last episode, we just talked about how people do shudge it us, UM, and so this was definitely one of the comments that we got back that you know, UM got a reaction. I'm still over reacting. UM. I think I mean you you said your points. I didn't feel that emotionally connected. Um, but before we're not

gonna introduce her. I guess um our guest Michelle Hope has something to say about that, and um, well, um uh, it's warm in here. And um, I think that what we need to remember is that there is a long history of white feminists who are very racist. Long history. Um. And I think that what I'm hearing I did not. I don't know who this person is. I just walked into this mess. I do love Lisa. I met her Afro punk one year. I thought she's the baddest bitch ever.

Where her nipples out, she goes hard. She goes so hard, but for a reason. But we ride for women people period. Man, that hard unless you're on Instagram. Mama, I'm not going to get into that, but I will. Well, yeah, I mean, we all go through problems. But I do believe. I mean, my mom is white, and she is a feminist, and she is a lesbian, and she has been in the fight for a long time before I was even here. She was a part of the movement. Um. But even I have had to have come to Jesus moments with

my mama. Like pause, Mama, you're a white woman, Like you don't walk down the street with people looking at you like what do you Or you don't walk into a store and people follow you around for the same time for the for reasons like oh, you might rob us. And you know, it was interesting when when my mother and I and I love my mother, and when my mother and I had that come to Jesus moment, you know, it was hard for her to hear, you know, from her grown child. But then you know, she left New York,

she came to visit me from Indiana. She came to visit me, and she left and she went home, she processed, and she was like, wow, you're right right, She was like, you know, and and when I was growing it's totally a different experience. And when I said, my mother has always been a part of the movement, my mom has said on boards that really fought for women's equity. And she, when I was growing up, was on a board of

women's arts and music festival that happened in Indiana. I always call it like Lilith Fair, before there was Lilith and when she was a part of that, after we had this kind of come to Jesus moment, and then she thought about it she we had a conversation and she was like, you know, Michelle, at that time when you were little, because I would go to these festivals because they had kids camp and it was super weird because it was like astro travel and dream catcher type

vision boarding ship before it was possible. She was like yeah, and and she said, you know, the black women always said they needed their own kind of section in the space, and we would give them pushback, like why we're all fighting the same fight. And after we had that come to Jesus moment, she was like, Michelle, you taught me that I was being discriminatory. I was we should have created Hopefully, she even understands where Weezy's frustration came from.

Instead of hearing you know, the anger and Wheezy's voice, she actually sits back, sits back and realizes that she's not sitting here shaming her or anything like that I was. She has to understand that the difference she felt like Lisa singled you know, people out or whatever, like she singled herself out to say I'm white and you did this time to people are going to have so many different experiences. Women that go through so many traumatic experiences

with different men. You have to appreciate for each person's story for she said. Don't get me wrong, there's things I've heard that I'm like, dam, that's too much on different podcasts and stuff like that. But you can't ship on that person for it. And this is exactly why I don't want to do sexual harassment episode sometimes, because you never know someone's journey. And we didn't know Lisa would go there, and I'm grateful that she did, because how did you not know Lisa was gonna go there?

I mean, I thought Lisa was gonna talk about I don't know, because a part of Lisa's is stemming from her experience, and I'm all for that, um. But you know, I'm just saying, and I lovely the other voice you heard in that episode was Michelle Hope shout out to her. UM. She actually joined me for the Brianna Taylor vigil um on Adam playing Powell and Harlem this this past weekend, and I just want to thank her for everything she's done.

But just listening to this conversation was mm hmmm. I want to say triggering, but went into why my statement last week was so hard to get over. Mom even just called UM, and we've been having just the struggle in how we are communicating right now. As you guys know, I I I'm black as hell, but I was raised by a white mother, and there's just been some some

difficulty in that. I do want to shout out also to the listeners who have reached out to me and my d M s UM for those who are not black but who are raising black children, and also the confusion that they're currently facing. UM. And And I talked to my mom literally yesterday, and she was like, you know, I'm okay with hearing that you hate white people. I know that you loved me, but she's like, she's hurt by how white people are and she hates that she's

white sometimes because here she is raising three strong black women. UM. Her partner is black, her nieces and nephews are black, and and she has on out UM and protested in Orlando. And I'm grateful for that. But like I said, as far as UM, those white listeners and those non black people who are raising black children, the only thing I can say as far as advice is to educate yourself.

And more than anything, I think what I've taken away from this is checking your own, check your mother's, your uncle's, your brothers, your sisters, those individuals who are not black, check them when they are wrong. I think that as black people, we have tried and tried and tried and tried again to tell y'all what the funk y'all are doing wrong, and we've shouted at the top of our lungs,

and y'all just don't hear us. So when our white allies, and our Latina allies, and our people of color who are not black allies are asking us what the hell they can do, I would say, check your kind, check them when they are wrong, and let them know that they are wrong, and be willing to stand there and lose a coworker, lose a friend, because they are worth it. If they not fight in the same fight as you, they meant to be a part of us. The next clip I'm about to play, many of you may not

have heard. It is a clip from a bonus episode with Brianda of the Super Trip Talk podcast, and we get into a pretty deep conversation regarding colorism and racism in the Latino community and whether we allow um the Latino community a pass on saying that the N word Um, we also get into the conversation regarding colorism and what Weezy and I have faced as biracial women having a black ass podcast and identifying as black women. Um, we

get into that conversation as well. So buckle up, um, turn up the volume and get ready for this clip. Dominican look like they're they're black, like the dudes. I feel like they got a little extra curl. There's something about the curl pattern in their hair. Dude, we share an island with I t come on like it's we If you saw my family, it is the most diverse looking racial group of course, like my grandfather. My sister

is black passing black passing. They used to think we were like friends every time we'd go out because we don't look alike. But she looks black passing my cousins. My grandfather is black. That's the interesting is that black passing. You know there's white passing, but why not just say she's looks for like, actually this is the whore high so they would understand. But for my listeners, I say black passing because they don't really they're not hip with

those terms yet black, so I use it. It's like I've heard pass. I've heard black passing from like Middle Eastern people when they when they referenced Middle Eastern people, but I've never heard they're just people who say that Latinos aren't black, And I just think that's a very limited way of thinking, Like Latinos are the one of the most racially diverse groups of people. Like Latinos are black,

Latinos are also white, you know what I mean. It's like a very odd statement to say we're starting hot. Where do you think that get in the psychedelic community there are mostly white. Because I was saying, like they fucking no like that there's in sensitive times and how people want to like be like that's interesting, I would you say, but I say black. And also my sister calls considers herself black. She has treated like a black person.

She works at Boston Children's Hospital, and they'd be treating her like not the best, you know what I mean, And it fuck it sucks, especially as my sister, and like to be honest with you, when you were a Dominican, she was older than me and she always got treated worse because I was a little lighter, right, And that was that I saw as a kid, like even my

mom My mom is a fucking cunt. Sometimes I think about the way she beat her I didn't get at treatment, you know, or the way my aunts would talk to my sister versus how they talk to me. Wow, and your own family, I mean, colorism is real with any family base. I mean to think, just to be hurtful, like I've seen I've seen conversations or like heard them within latinos talking about how maybe their family would whether it's pressing their hair, telling them something hard to find someone,

or bleaching. But I've never heard about like beating on them. Fuck, oh my god, Like you wouldn't believe I would do the same ship as a kid that my sister would do and my sister would get hit for it. These are things that I'm talking about in therapy now. I'm super close with my sister, who I said her birthdays today and I'm gonna I canceled my day to day to go to her because she was like, I don't

feel in the kind of weight. But I feel like I owe my own sister kind of reparations for the amount of ship that I wasn't able to provide her as a kid, Like empathy or like seeing that she was going through a tougher time. She was also overweight.

Imagine that, like it was just a lot and uh and so yeah, she's a black woman period if she she gets treat like that out so ninetheen like that's But the thing that really pisces me off was as a kid recounting memories and um, thinking about memories that I had that she does it and she was there for like I was recently talking about like a family reunion we had when we were like ten, and she remembers she didn't get fed what she didn't get fed

at this party? And I was talking to her about this town culture that we had that was like amazing, and she was like, oh, yeah, they didn't. They didn't. You know this is this is awkward because so we've had the conversation about um, like the uncomfortablelity of even

Latinos saying the N word um. And so even having the conversation with you, I guess this goes into why I don't like when they say it um because specifically growing up in Orlando and being friends like my friends growing up, UM, majority of them, even if they were black, they were either Jamaican or Haitian, just because of the

side of time I grew up on. But my best friends were also Colombian and Mexican, and in terms of how they treated black people is why I don't want to give Latinos of any origin the right to use that word, because they have been just as oppressive or racist towards black people as white people. Black people also that we would all the black people colorism and ship. That's true, but what she's saying that But as far as it different, Yeah, I've had Latino friends. I've watched

treat back people crazy. Tom. We're from Florida's so you've got a lot more like in schools, I honestly don't pep rallies were segregated. Everyone would bring their fucking flags. So I went to Oakridge High School. I want to walk in middle school like I went. I lived on on Oakridge on the west side of town, and then

I went to high school in Pine Hills. So in Florida, like we would have pep rallies, and during pep rallies literally you would have your Jamaicans in a section, your Haitians in a section, your Mexicans, your Puerto Ricans, and everyone who would bring their flags, but we would segregate ourselves as teenagers based on what countries like we were from, and I prig Domican bro and my school specifically was like all of the schools that I went to were

over nine black, like black or or or Latina. Um. I didn't go to any schools really with any white kids except for my freshman year I got into a Magnet program for TV production. Um. But me being around even my friends families growing up, Um, I remember them blaming me for their daughters dating black men. I remember, um, yes, my like literally like my my friend was Columbian growing up and your weezy um may actually meet some of them at the Orlando show. Um, but I just remember

like them blaming me for them dating black men. I remember, um, certain music or people that we liked them being like using the N word in a bad way, like to where they literally to me. Latinos have oppressed and shown hatred towards black people the same way I've seen white people do. So I don't agree that all Latinos can. I never say, all, well, you said Latino shouldn't use the word, but there I don't think a lot of them I have an issue with the Afro Latina and

Latino blanket. The only close friend that I have that says that is Sharona's um, he's Afilatica. He'll say he's a Fi Latino. But I just really feel like like there's this other dude I know that talks about how he's a Fi Latino, and I feel like he does it so he can say naked. I know I'm being extra, it's a feeling. I feel like if there's a weight when you say it and like, oh no, this is like when Merro says the N word. I don't know.

I understand. He's Dominican. He is our Dominican, so he's black as ship to me, Merro's black, Okay, he's Latino and Dominican is ship, so I'm gonna say both. But he's not black. Well, he is black Dominican. Actually, what is it gonna be? What is it? Guys? The black black Jesus is here. Here's why Meryl is what you would say is black passing, right, But there are a lot of Afro Latino people with I would even and this is just me looking at you, not even knowing you,

I would even call you Afro Latina. Saw you but also don't think you're black passing. So I feel like nigga can't be used. Is that weird? I say, if there was a meter, the metric is the way people say. I can tell when you weren't raised in this, you weren't grandfathered in this, like when I can tell when people are just saying it to acclamate or like to like using it, like on some really eilish type ship,

some appropriating ship. It's a weight, of course when you talk about it, it's hard to contextualize because it's a field. Just feel like Afro Latino doesn't give you a nigga pass. I don't believe that, but I believe that like Afro Latino people like when you are when you have black skin as an Afro Latino, I feel like that's different. I know what's sucked up because I'm I'm mixed, you know what I'm saying, and I don't have black skin.

But at the end of the day, I feel like this is a new thing that I've never seen before, that's come about since, like I would say, since I've turned twenty five. Suddenly I started seeing this thing. It's just moved up here though. This Dominicans are all around here. A yeah, I mean we're we're from Florida's so yes, New York is probably on the north on a well

on a larger scale too, as far as Dominicans. But no one like there was no just white and black in any question for the can Afric Latino say the Ani world, No, ma'am, I think if I think so, it's a it's a note for me. It's however, I do have a there's a merrow thing for me. She just said, as Harrow is on the because I didn't know which one. Maybe it was Jesus or mayor I don't know which one. Do they not appear to both the black men? To you? No one looks hispanic? I'm sorry, Well,

now he is. He looks missy, so he looks mixed. He's not. Jesus is clearly the black one. If you see both of them, I guess you're one looks easy because he's attained this huge success. And now like, does that give him credence incredibility to say the N word because that's classics. That's not fair. That's an interesting point of view because I and and I guess that's where it's like subjectivity because I just said, oh, if you're a Latilla the black skin, then I feel like you can't.

When I looked at Mayor, I thought he was black. But see but see, here's the thing. To me, Um, your sister, yeah, even though she is in the skin of a and after Latina, and would I guess identify like view to us as someone who's black. Me to me, knowing that she grew up in a family that that was racist or presented. Oh, my sister says the N

word right, right, but that's what I'm saying. But to me, like, even that's like with my friend now, Like to me, I joke all the time and I tell her she's white passing idan Like, Bro, don't say the N word on the phone with me, because I know the people

that you grew up around are racist. So to me, being that you grew up around people who have that mentality, to me, that takes away the fact that you could use that N word even more because the people around you showcase that racism, which is why we don't let white people say the word, right, there's a level of

oppression behind it. And to me, if you were oppressed in that space and you grew up and the people that you love and are around you are oppressing you because of the color of your skin and you being black presenting. I have a problem with you even using that word. I mean, at the end of you still friends with that person. When we talk on the phone, I'll be like, I'll hang up on you, like, don't

say that any word being her go we battle. I think I know what you're talking about, and I feel every time she says it, And so when we're talking, i'd be like, Bro, you can't say it, bro, only because she's I don't know what she's light skin. What is you look white? You white? Latino? Bro, I've a really interesting Yeah, that's white, and my Dominicans would think that's white, right, So, Bro, don't say that in word.

And so I feel like, get the extra extras. Crazy that you brought this conversation because so we have such a diverse listenership in the war Hive. Um, of course, about to say that the diverse listenership. No, I'm about to bring up some ship that I would just say as far as the diverse listenership and our war Hive is is appreciated, but also real quick, um, I know

we're talking about Latino's right now. But um, I recently got a d m um from a white girl and it was just like, um, I think on one of my stories from the podcast, and she asked if white people would feel comfortable coming to our show. She wanted to come, and I'm just like absolutely, like but just no, like we make fun of white people all the time. Like it's just kind of I wanted to hold because

you guys are both gonna love this. I actually have already talked about this on an episode that's come out with Eddie, but love him. That episode was so fun. He was so funny when we mentioned science, Like Eddie is so touching go because I mentioned something about science and he goes man, he doesn't plean in science, are you serious? And then he comes but if she's smart, Um, he's he's he's great and I like that he fits, but he ain't got to Like I appreciate people like that.

They don't have to like maneuver and put this voice on. But anyway, I read this with Eddie because he's Peruvian, he's Latino. But I really want to read this again so Mandy has never heard this. I was gonna do it on the episode with Mandy, but I was like it, I'll do it with Eddie because he's Latino. You guys have already heard this, but this is even better because you're a Latino. So this is from a patron who is top tier. UM wanted to let me know that before she um okay front. I went in on the

last episode about my feelings on this. UM. I called to Latino friends of mine to ship. There's no signal in here. It's not loading, but UM, just to tell you what's going on. Mandy and I made a comment on an episode fifty six Valentines or Gallantine's where I told her I was on a cruise and that I said, oh, now that we're popping, I don't know when black people look at me if it's remember saying that, or or

a black thing. And then Mandy said horrible decisions is a black thing, and I said, oh, you're right, that's true. Here is the listener. Damn, I didn't Yeah, I don't know. Hello easy. I know this may not get seen, but this has been bothering me for quite some time. I understand the motive behind your shows. UM outline is for

the awareness in a black community. But I do get offended that I've paid fifteen dollars a month to hear about how horrible decisions is made for Black women when I'm in mixed ethnic Latino relate to your show as well. I've always been able to sideswipe the comments about Latino women, et cetera. I do appreciate the love for Afro Latino, but from Latinos from all areas on a spectrum can

relate to you. I don't understand how you can just always make horrible decisions a black thing when your audience is so broad, especially when I know you're I know how you're all gonna feel, and I keep reading. Just let me get it out, especially when no matter the type of Latino we maybe we're still minorities. Yes, our struggles aren't the same, but we still go with one of the regular Black women have overcame slage with slavery, prejudice, segregation,

and fixation for years, but so have we. A lot of our mothers and fathers left their countries with no stability, strength, or education just to make a better world for us. I didn't say we had it bad, but we have similar struggles. UM and the show relates to women. I feel like the show is a woman's show who don't have a comfort or space to speak on this stuff, because how do I ask my Mexican grandmother about sucking dick? Um, But it's too taboo to speak sexuality and a lot

of cultures in societies. I just hope this comes across to you guys and understand this bothers him when I've invested in you guys and I'm placed in a category where you don't feel but I don't feel relatable, um or it doesn't feel relatable. I'm going to include the clip that bothered me. Please be aware of our love. Um. She also mentioned that she did this with another patron. I'm going to wrap up what I said because you

guys heard it last week. But I thought about a lot what I said to her, and I was like, you know what, it isn't a woman show. That's true because we have any male patrons, but it is a black thing. She's just welcomed in the space. And then I told her, no one white has ever written me this, and they know this is a black show. No one white has ever written me this. The Latina's that come to the show and a joke all the time and say Maria and Marie is in the audience. They know

it's a black ass fucking show. And you know one has ever said this. And what really pissed me off about what she said is I invested in it and you're making it a black thing, my nigga. I went to see Jesus and Mary about five times, probably spent over a rat and more than that over flying to

their ship. And when Jesus goes on a Dominican fucking rent and I don't know what he's saying, I'm sitting there appreciating it and not saying I invested in this and you didn't speak English because I know that's his ship. I know when I do Latino ship is their ship. I supported our cosh at a Desi show on an Indian comedy show. To be honest with you, half of the jokes there was many Indians there. I ain't really get,

but I was like, fuck it, like he's funny. I'm fucking with it, like I want to support your ship? How dare she? And I'm getting more angry of it as the weeks go on, say that she was mad that she invested in it because it's not an inclusive thing. All these motherfucking white people on our Patreon, they ain't said a fucking word. And I know, out of the two of us, I've probably been way more out there

with white people. And I'm the one that from the white guy fucker that says about white people like I don't. I just don't like she said that black women overcame slavery, prejudice, svegicism. Um, if you look at what's going on just even right now in society, black women are still fighting struggles that outside of slavery, all of those other as far as like the war on wage gaps, Um, what black black women feeling still, the vegicism of of a lot of

other cultures. There's still things that we like, we have not. I don't think that I need to even say that black women go through more than Latina because I'm gonna stop right there. I That's why it's funny because with the episode with the doctor where you said, no, I'm talking about black women, I said, I'm talking about Latina women too. When they're with the rate that they're dying

in the hospitals, it's literally a one percent difference. I'm not saying they don't go through struggles, but we're not Latina chicks. So I don't a black girl talking, don't. I don't have I don't have the Latino experience, no one in my family. I don't even want to say black girls go through more ship. I'm gonna tell you right now, black la I'm not. I'm not gonna say I'm not gonna speak to someone's experience Black women on on average, yes they do, but I'm not gonna speak

to hers. None of us have been through slavers and and I me, or you or her, so I don't want to speak to that. I'm not gonna do this stupid fucking Oh black girls go through more ship than the Latino girls. I think that's sucking dumb. I think what should be said is you're talking the two girls that have grown up in a black community, have a black parent, identify as black women, and then mad that it's not. I think it's a woman thing, like, fuck you,

it's not. And I didn't say the fucking shipped to her at first, But now I'm starting to kind of like get more angry because I know that like doing these shows, even Texas, which so many latinos. No one gave me that energy at all. And I'll be talking ship, No one gives me that energy at all. You know who wants to get fake mad about a Latino accident? Black girls that just fucking don't like me, White girls

that don't like me. Them Latino chicks be laughing at my dam talking about how I sound like they're fucking grandma. She's really picking some ship that I don't even get. You know how many fucking shows there are that like have latinos and host them. Go listen to that. I don't listen to white sex podcast because I don't relate, you know what I'm saying. I listen to a white comedy podcast because I have that kind of humor and

I enjoy it. You're listening to this black sex pod because you feel like there's a comfortability in it that's sticking with you. I can't understand how you could even say you can't invest in it when it's still a black woman Mrs. Not to mention, you also said, oh, we're all minorities, so you can't do a minority business. I have to be more fucking inclusive to you. Like

that's not fair, Like literally made this fucking space. And initially, when I had this podcast idea and I came to Mandy, I didn't even tell her I wanted it to be a black thing. The second episode, it was already a black fucking thing period. There was no going around it. So I'm not about to go back because the audience got bigger now and saying okay, no, never mind, it's not a black thing anymore, because she know what, there's a lot of black things that fucking blow up and

people become millionaires. So I'm not gonna now shy away from it and say it's a woman thing, not when niggas being our d ms, Not when niggas are holding us down and also investing, much like you fucking shout out the Siggy every shot to say, I want to

shout out Siggy. I want to. Yeah. The the amount of men who have come to our meet and greet and have put their their partners on is just I wouldn't say Ashrams is the women listeners, but but but it goes to show that men are listening to this and bringing this to their homeboys, to their partners, to their to their cousins, to their friends. So I do want to shout out UM to our male listeners because I think that they are just as important UM to

our growth as the women are. And so yes, UM, I know we've had conversations about feminism and women support and all their things, UM, and I know that we do talk about race a lot on this show as well. But I know that there has been a strong focus in making this is a space for people of color. But again, Weezie and I have a black experience where identifies black women, so outside of you guys maybe not

feeling inclusive in all of the conversations. I not only want to apologize if you're offended, but also say sorry, don't give a fuck, it is what it is. The only thing I'll apologize for is ever saying a fucking selar, whether it's our word, and I want to apologize, like

for the M word. I know you don't want to apologize for it, but to me, if you're a small person or if you're someone that has like mentally challenged people in your family and stuff like that, and we've ever said something like that, I'd apologize for that offense. I'm not going to fucking apologize for making a joke on here. I say niggazaine ship. So if I want to say Latino niggazat ship, I'm grouping in all the negs. I say white niggation ship. I fucking give people I

know for a fact equal trolling. Okay, so I'm sorry. Can I ask you tell me how you felt about the response? As so a couple of things, Um, this is such a small percentage of this is a very and she's an anomaly. This is a fan who identifies with a lot of what you guys have to say, and some something like triggered her, that sparked this this message.

You know, I wouldn't give that too much way. I don't even get mad at it because I just I see that this is someone who's maybe a little lost in her own space, I think, and she's projecting one. I have a question though, just popped into my head, and I'm sure some of your listening to have the question too, but they don't have the privilege of being in front of you. Do you guys ever get hate from black women like black women telling you guys that

y'all are not all the time? Well that I'm always though in the beginning of the show, not so much now not now, but in the beginning of the show. Um, they said that our we didn't have enough dark skinned guests on the show, but that was true. They also said,

I wasn't that wasn't bullshit. Um, I disagree. Um. They also they also said that um our experience, because of how we look and the color of our skin, means that we haven't gone through some of the black troubles that they feel like can we really relate to Like yes, So we've had that question from I think things to say.

That's the one thing I'll say. What she's saying is different from from those comments saying that if we've made blanket statements for black people, that's that's the fucking thing that they can say. Um. The only thing I don't agree with is people are picking choosy over who can say naked. And I've had a few people like y'all say it too much. This is an entitled she's an

entitled fan. And by the way, the more you guys grow that she's gonna happen more, you know, like, let's just say, you guys put him blow if you guys are on a network. When you guys are on a network, I see this blowing major there are going to be certain things like executives being like, could we expand the way we speak about certain things so that we do include more minorities. Would you guys ever change your script or would you keep it not on the podcast on TV?

I would. I don't know if Mandy feels the same, but I come from a TV film background and I know for a fact that that would be the first I'm not even gonna lie like my first conversation, UM, we are possibly talking and wanting to expand the podcast into a TV form format, and just because we've grown an audience with being exactly who we are, I think one of my first questions was how many dicks, fox, pussies, niggas are we gonna have that we can say, like, I still want to be very true to us and

not and not wash it down for how we speak, what our lingo is, what our demographic is, but I for sure would open it up to having Indians come on and express their actually down for that for TV versus the podcast. So there was a lot. There was

a lot in that conversation. UM. Again, if you guys are interested in hearing more, you can join us UM for more discussions like this at patreon dot com Backslash Horrible Decisions, And before I leave you guys off with a final word from Wheezy, UM, I do want to leave off by saying and telling you to say her name. Pamela Turner, say her name, Sandra Bland, say her name, Brianna Taylor, say her name, Karen Gains, say her name.

A Tatiana Jefferson say her name, Chantel Davis. And again, guys, continue to educate yourself and let's continue to fight for justice for all of those wrongfully taken from us. UM. Just to let you know, guys, although you have heard my voice, this has been a collaborative effort um between Wheezy and I picking out these specific um moments in Horrible Decisions. And I am going to leave you guys

with Wheezy. UM. She was just out of town and we definitely instead of not having an episode at all, UM, we wanted to put this out. And so I am leaving you guys with Wheezy and I want to thank you guys and everyone who has done their part in the Black Lives Matter movement and fighting for justice. So here goes Wheezy, guys and again, thank you, m H. I want to thank you for getting to the end of this episode because I understand that this could have

been triggering for you. And honestly, there's a lot of podcasts I don't listen to if I feel like they're gonna upset me. But I love you and I'm happy you're here, and if you've been a long time listening, I'm happy to know that you may have remembered those moments and been some of the ones to email us and tweet us and talk about your experiences too. I just want to say something before I let you go.

If you don't mine uh, if you follow me on Instagram, you know about my Black Power wall and probably know that I'm a fan of Malcolm X. And while a lot of people like to argue and say that he changed his life for the better, he's still always believed, by any means necessary, that things needed to get done.

And in regards two conversations that you may have, whether it be on social media or with someone you know or a colleague or someone even who's black, it says, oh yeah, but why not peaceful and talk about looting and writing even if you wouldn't have done it yourself, even if you're not the person that would break a window. We all need to understand that looting and writing is war, and after war, people get what they want. War is

for a purpose. No one just goes in and starts taking oil and in money and fucking shut up because they felt like it and it was Tuesday. There's a reaction to something, and that's exactly what's happening in our lives. We're watching people who have been in the house for months, who've lost their jobs, who have no fucking money. Watch black women, men and women die in front of their face on TV, on their Twitter, in their phones in their hands, and seeing that and feeling angry and wanting

to function up and fucking shut up. Is that a lot of things get done. You may have heard me talk about when I was in Paris with scissors and how many riots and protests we saw and things on fire, setting people on fire, which is insane. But the French get what they want because their government scared of them. And I think a lot of our issue has been that we don't press the government that we fund enough. We're taxpaying citizens and got the nerve to beg men

in uniform that we pay to not shoot us. That's insane, that's fucking crazy. And honestly, this is exactly why I wanted people to donate on behalf of bail bonds for protesting. I'm not saying that it's right that the mom and

pop shot gut it. Don't. Don't get me wrong. But I understand that soldiers die where I understand that things happen, that people get affected and it's sad, but it's just anger and exhaustion, and we have to make sure that we're educating people about that when we are having these conversations, these tough conversations. Don't let anybody run over you about

something you're passionate about, no matter who you are. If you are black, if you are Latina, if you are right, if you're Asian, if you're brown, if you're Indian, whoever, and you are passionate about the things we are passionate about, make sure you can run those fucking circles around them when this gets going, make sure you can do it. Just do your best to keep yourself in the know.

That is the best thing we can do. We have it right in our hands, right where you're listening to this podcast, Whether YouTube, whether it be fucking your phone, whatever, please make sure I implore you to do your best to have high level conversations about things that are affecting us for the rest of our lives. Congratulations to you for listening to a podcast like this where other people may not like the opinions, but we all know we're going to be on the right inside of history thirty

years from now. We talked to our kids and they look at pictures and asked us what the funk was going on that week, and we knew we were a part of that. I want to personally thank you guys that helped me fundraise between some of our listeners and just Instagram following that I have on Twitter, and we got to twelve thousand, six hundred something dollars to go to protesting bonds And it was amazing to see people band together like that. And I I have a lot

of faith in humanity in this moment. And maybe I'm naive to say that, but I really know that the world is starting to see how we've all been feeling. Next week, I'm looking forward to making you guys laugh again. I'm looking forward to figuring out who's making this outline I'm looking forward to Mandy and I present a guests and laughing. I'm really excited for that because I want some normal back to But the normal that I want back is what I used to have and more I

want things to change. I know you do too. I love you for listening, I love you for sticking through this end, and I just briefly again, much like I did on that Black Lives Little thing um last Sunday, I just want to take thirty seconds to where we breathe through this, we start a great day, we let a lot of heavy weight off our shoulders, and we come back to center. So I'm gonna take thirty seconds. If you're driving, I'm sorry, or if you're out in public,

my bad. But if you can close your eyes and let's take a deep breath through our nose, out through your mouth, In through your nose, out through your mouth. I'm just doing a quick thirty seconds aditation. I want you to feel it right in the front of you before ahead, set a good intention for the day. Since set something you're going to teach yourself today, something that will make you feel good in their nose, out there, your mouth. By no means in my yogi, psychic guru.

But I know what to do and I need to chill the funk out. I love you, guys, I can't wait to see you next week. Piece