EP 427: Between the Sheets and the Pages Ft. Traci (The Stacks Podcast)

Welcome to Decisions Decisions. I don't think you should say decision decisions. It sounded like you was talking to Kirsty. You definitely say to welcome, welcome to the new podcast.

Oh wait, you want to say together decisions decisions. Hey, everybody, welcome to another episode of this Sizzy Y'all's the Sizzy y'all.

We are not you putting the glasses on the authors.

Oh my guy, you are the authors of no host part I knew sitting with Tracy, the host of the Stacks podcast.

That's right.

And I want to play you the clip of how I found you because I just thought so.

We had Brian.

Brandon and if you don't remember his episode, it may have been like last year, maybe even.

Two years ago, a while ago. Oh there's his book. Yeah, and it was for his book. Yeah, so he was on from you Gotta Be You.

I saw this clip of Tracy and I just wanted to talk to her or follow her because the clip was so funny. And then I realized, oh my god, this bitch does books.

Not this bitch does book.

She does you a buck, Debbie does, Dallas Cracy does, but he does book.

So this is a clip and I want you guys to hear this because I was like, oh, she's fine.

I am the worst mom in the social group of moms in the world of children. I have five year old twins, as you know, and there are moms who.

Want to be friends. I don't want to be fun. I have frin and I will ignore, sure, I will lie.

That's so my favorite move is like, hey, do you guys want to like do a playdate tomorrow or like later today? Leave on red until I'm like an hour after. I'm like, oh my god, I'm just we're just getting out of something grew and I is so honest.

It's true. Moms act like I am. I'm hanging this mom in this mom.

It's like what if you hate them?

I mean, it's so different than like, hoes want to be friends with other hose because they relate.

So moms want to be friends.

With other moms because now we have something, yes, but we don't comly.

Want to talk about stupid kids. Shit, that's our problem. It's not even that these women I wouldn't want to be friends with in other circumstances, but all they want to talk about is like, what does your kid eat? What time did they go to bed? And I'm just like, have you watched you a TV show recently?

Like?

Do you like sports?

Like? It doesn't even have to be like tell me your trauma. It can just be anything other than to your own dangerous. But who do you talk about your kids with?

Because if you think about it, one of my friends recently told me who had a kid.

I was like, day, i'll hear from me anymore. She's like, you don't want to hear about this kid shit?

And I know it's crazy. One.

None of my friends talk to me about their kids because I could careless, but.

I could care less abou other people's kids, so too, I don't even want to talk about my kids like truly as I don't.

I mean you can, I don't. So just a few boundary ground rolls.

I don't I ever say my kid's names publicly, and I don't ever put them on social media.

Give voice right and girl, we're gonna do that to the men we fought.

Okay, we never say their names on the podcast, and we never post them on our social media.

My kids are I try to keep them private for I mean, I'll tell you their story of why I do that protecting them. But also so there's an influencer that I follow who lives in my neighborhood and I've been following her for a long time, and she had a daughter. And one day I was walking down the street like this little neighborhood and I saw the little girl with the nanny and I said, oh, my god, there's blank And then I realized I actually didn't know that kid. But I thought that that was a little

This is ridiculous, and I'm not trying to compare your children to a dog, but I knew shit got weird.

I was driving one day in La.

My dog is uh hanging out the window.

I'm like sitting outside the car. Girl walks by and goes hey, Nina and doesn't speak to me, and I was like, oh, bitch, Yeah, it's weird. Looney too, Yeah it's weird. And yeah, when I go.

On Live My My My like core like fans literally refer to Body my cat as their nephew.

Where is my nephew at that's cute, but they know Body.

They're like, Body done got so big because that's my kid.

My cat does go on the internet.

But yeah, it's like, oh wow, y'all have known Body since he was a little little bit and now you growing up and you refer to my cat.

When we were first starting this episode, I said, oh my god, Tracy, have to hold this thought. Tracy was telling us what she thought about She's read the entire book No holds Word, We just miss a saxpod, and was talking about what she thought about meeting us after reading the book. So I'd love for you to repeat that because I want to tell you what I.

Said about here. Yeah, so I both well.

I said that I thought that Mandy was like friendlier than I thought that you would be, like warmer, less guarded, than I thought. And I thought that you were goofier than I was expecting because your chapters are like really like sexy, like sex you know, I mean not all of that, they're very sex forward, but also the goofy side of you does not come out in the chapters. Oh wow, I don't feel like you are goofy. You're funny. You're definitely funny, like you're cracking jokes.

Hold on, this bitch just said on goofy in person.

This is goofy, is hope, but goofy in like a good way, not goofy in the pejorative way, like like like.

Silly, like playful.

I don't think that that side of you came out comes out as much as it does in person.

You know.

That's the thing about me that's very difficult, I think to be a boss. We've been approached by this company to do a show about our studio and my business partner, and I was like making up different episodes. I'm like, one of the episode episodes, sorry, I braceist, should be about how I can't give an employee bad news. So we're structuring this, I'm like, I want to take one of the employees on. Let me take her to a spa day. Let's just say nishe is right here and

And so to that point.

One of the issues my boyfriend had with me early on and we just spoke about it again recently because he's like, you've gotten better. He thought I wasn't into him because I was so goofy and silly and playful, and he's like, bro, we'll be in the middle of making out and you're like, can you imagine if blah blah.

Blah, it's really add But he hated it, and he's like I and I thought you couldn't connect with me. I thought you weren't as interested. I thought she wanted to be friends. And last week before he left, he had candles out for me, pulled a.

Blind full out and I was like, oh my god, I've been getting on your nerves.

You're gonna kill me, bag, and he's like, yo, you shut the fuck I'm there's shot a playing and I'm like, I get it, but it's so tough for me to, I don't know, not be this person. And so I love hearing you say that in the book, I was sexier because people don't know what I look like in that book, and then maybe when they meet me, they're like, oh, the braces, the whole us of your hair, like this

So I feel like, yeah, because I'm mean, I listened to the show and so I was actually a little bit surprised when I was reading it because it's like like for your chapters, because I feel like you are like much more like off the cuff. But that's the thing about writing is like that doesn't translate on the no.

And that's the thing too, And with writing the book, Weezy at one point where it was like we have to go back and forth like we do on the podcast and like have some sort of dialogue, and I was like, no, that doesn't it's a book, it doesn't, that doesn't apply.

It is actually my biggest regret of this book.

I wish there is a moment where one chapter, one paragraph something where you got to see Mandy and and Weezy speak. I am a really big fan of that. I love moments that break the fourth wall. And so that's why in the book a lot, I'll use quotation marks of what people say, insert text message here, just anything I can so you remember and ground and you ground yourself in reality.

Yeah.

I know that we are doing such a good job on our podcast going back and forth no matter if we disagree or agree, that you get to see dialogue there. And so the book was very scary to do because that was gone. And this is my connection to Mandy in my business and in my life is are back and forth.

So the book being super this is us was different. Yeah. But I want to ask you, because the stack spot even doing for seven years.

How many books have you read the seven years? No or in my life? Do you think you know?

Well? I know how many books I've read since twenty sixteen? Okay, what's that number? I don't know exactly because I don't have my phone on me. I think it's eight hundred and seventy six Yeah, eight month. So it's not gonna be an average because in twenty and sixteen and twenty seventeen I didn't do the show, so I was reading. Last I read about eight to twelve books a month on average. This month, I just finished Shelf's book. I'm going to finish one more book today and I.

Will be Yeah because of eleven month and yeah, one day we're going on this.

Austin didn't take you to read no holes word two days? Well, it's amazy, that is well. I mean i'm reading.

So if I read eight books a month, eight books a month, that's less. But if I'm reading twel books, which I think'm gona end up at eleven or twelve, that's about three days of book.

That's about my average. Wow.

So and your book isn't that long? Like I'm read the book.

I'm about to finish just six hundred pages and that's taken me.

Like if they wouldn't have edited, my god, damn, y let you write, it would have been at pages. Sorry, I know where it's too. I think the book is two hundred and seventy four pages.

Yeah, so you prefer.

Reading an actual book pages, fingers, audio, I.

Do all of it.

I will read on digital device. I will read a physical book and I will listen to an audiobook. My my real, true, most preferred way is actually to have all three going at once of the same book. So I like to have one book where I have a physical copy, like in the daytime, when I'm reading in bed, I'll switch to the digital and then if I'm in the car doing chores, audio put on the audio. I like to do a one I call myself a one book pony. I just like to do one book at

Are you don't even have the audio version of the audio of yours?

So I only had a digital, But hopefully they'll send me the physical so that I can I.

Just look at it. I can take it.

Day.

Are you married? I'm looking at your I am married. What is he like? Okay?

So I also don't say his name, but we call him mister Stacks. Yeah, we call the kids the ministacks. Mister Sacks is a doctor, okay, is a obigu? I n okay, And he's a pretty chill person. He's very quiet that he is.

A super reader too.

That's really he's not a super reader. He reads. He probably reads fifteen to twenty books a year. I would say, so a book a month or a little more.

Have you this is such a random question. Okay, he's not my obie. No, even more random.

But because we're we still lean into sex a little bit and the reality of how woman think. Have you ever been jealous of the fact that he goes to work and is an other women's pussies all day?

No, because once you start hearing the stories of other women, I don't like it's And also his patient population is like some like he worked at the county hospital here in La Okay, so you know, and like people oftentimes are coming in for issues where it's like.

Bleeding, okay or yeah, tell the story. Tell the story. What's the craziest one? The cwa the craziest one? I think I can tell this. How long have you been together? Fifteen years? Oh? You got stories?

Tell Okay, this is the craziest one. This is when he was working in county a woman came in. I don't want to say anything that's gonna get anybody in trouble, so I'm try to keep a bag. But a woman came in. She had an object in her vagina, and the police had also come like after her, and they were like, she needs to go into operating and so like the police were waiting and they were like, you need to tell us, like what's in her vagina? And I don't. I don't think that the doctors were allowed to.

But basically they go in and they're like, what the fuck is this? Was it a shank? No, it was hot, and.

It had fused to the walls of her vagina and it was a crack pipe and they had busted up a like crackhouse, and to avoid getting arrested, she put it up with it see up her vagina and it got fused inside of her vagina. Wait wait, and that's glass. That's shut the fuck up. So that's a crazy story. I don't remember what the fallout was from it. I don't remember if they had to like turn her over. But the County Hospital is you know, that's where you

Did he get the crackpipe out? They had to do full surgery.

Oh yeah, you have to do a full you have to cut because it was fused to the tissue.

So it's really bad. What's crazier about you? Talking about County? A friend of mine shout out to Toya. She works at a county jail h taking care of patients, and she literally he was like, girl, I gotta get out of here. She was like, because the men for some reason are respecting a woman doctor and she doesn't have too many issues. She's like, the women just feel like they can say anything to me. She's like, and these are girls, like they're in jail, so these women are different.

She's like, they be confused.

I may have to give someone HIV results and they're like, how do you get rid of it? She's like, sitting there having to go step by step ABC whether it be sensed, what they don't understand sticking things in there, that's crazy.

It's crazy now, I know.

I know they's just be putting like drugs in a pussy when they like drug mules, and.

Yeah, they'll put it up a little little bag a crack pipe. Yeah, is crazy. You know what's shameful about this story?

I was traveling with friends and we wanted to bring mushrooms with us somewhere because we didn't want to buy them out of the country because we were all scared those mushrooms would kill us. So I'm traveling with you guys. They're like, what are we gonna do? And I'm like, I have Nature's pocket.

Oh my gosh, so that's crazy. They're all looking at me like we see this is insane. I'm like, it's not a big deal. It's clean. I got it now.

I wasn't going to keep it up there the whole time, or even I just literally put it like on the line up under it because I'm thinking I'll just take it out and put.

It on my first once we've lost tsa girl.

We was going through custom for four hours, and the entire time we were going through customers, they kept saying, kill mushrooms is different.

It turns a fun guy that shit is crazy.

And honestly, I connect with this because you can't know how many times she probably didn't put some shit up there before.

Now you got to go to the doctor and there's glass.

Well, I mean, and LAPD is so fucking crazy and they probably were going to try to put her under the jail.

For do em like, have you ever put anything in your pussy? No? I mean penis, that's it, fingers. It's funny because I was. I was telling my homegirl the story.

If you guys are new here, I'll read share this story. But if you're old, I've told told the story on the pot, I believe. But back when I was just craving dick and needed it so bad, so I don't fuck on my period. However, this guy came, came in town, came into New York, and I fucking wiped pink that morning, and I was like, oh, bitch, we didn't already made plan.

We fucking but I don't want to fuck with wait blood.

So my homegirls had told me the trick of the makeup sponges.

Oh, so I didn't learning so much.

So basically what my friends told me to do was take a makeup sponge, like the regular round ones that you can get in the bag from CBS or something like that. So you take a round makeup sponge and you lub it up and you fold it and put it in your pussy. So how do you get it out? So let me tell you.

I was.

Let me tell you.

So the problem is The problem being a wife of an ob is that I know that quickly.

So let me tell you girls.

So, because I didn't want the blood, and because this was my first time, I was like, I'm gonna put two up there just in case. So I looped up to put it up. So the trick is, if a man goes in your pussy, it just feels like a pussy wall. He doesn't even feel that anything is in there. So we fucking, we fucking, we fucking we fucking. And I had done this, like no, no, at this point, I hadn't done it before.

This was my first time.

So I do it and I'm like, okay, mind you. My nails are like this at the time. Okay, So after we're done federal gatting their pointing. Yeah, really long stiletto nails. So this was before I started doing my shirt two fingers. So I'm done fucking. My roommate knows I did it all and all this stuff, so he leaves, he goes to say his hotel, he leaves, and I'm like okay, So I go into the bathroom and I'm literally on the toilet and I start doing the kegels.

I'm trying.

I'm trying and trying. I start freaking out. So I go to my fucking roommate. Shout out to Lena. D's my home girl. So I go to my roommate and I'm like, bro, I can't get these fucking sponges out my pussy.

Like, oh, my fucking who told you up there?

No, it was one of my one of my like porn star friends, okay, who have done it on set before. So no, she just knew I did it, but she's never done it. She's like what the fuck. She's like, what the fuck you mean? They're not coming out? I said, Bro, these fucking sponges. I don't know where they're at, but they're fucking not coming out. I need your help. So she goes into the kitchen. She grabs the yellow kitchen glove. Okay,

Digging in my fusty to pull these gud damn sit out.

No.

I was just like, bro, but she got she felt him. She was like, oh I think I got it. I was like, oh yeah, I feel it. Okay, grab it out, grab it out. And then I was like, there's one more in there. You gotta go back in there. There's one more in there. You gotta go back in.

And she literally and I was like, oh my god, bro, you're like the best. So I just told my best friend Crystal this because Lena was like reminding her, like even adding more of the details to the story. And Crystal, who's my best friend? She number one of the eleven. She said, Oh, you might love her more than I do, because.

I'm not going to bitch. You did what you would have knew it for a friend.

You wouldn't put your hand up of friends, Vagina to gain some fanatical your husband does like this's your that. Okay, I would get a tool.

I'd be like, you.

Wouldn't do it.

But she had a glove on. She had a glovehnet.

No, I probably would do it, but I don't talk about it forever, and I would never not talk about it for the rest of our life, you know.

The crazy part about it. And he saw me from want it.

Just the next time. I only put one up though. Did you get it out? Oh? Yeah, which is so weird.

That's why I think maybe the two was too much problem because the one, Oh it was, it was, and I've only done it on day one. I would never do that if I was on a heavy flow, right, Jim mistakes?

Just like, hey, a condom will also take care of the blood tooe.

What do you mean, It's not like it's going to get on them.

Oh no, I'm not fucking with no goddamn bloh blah for real. Bro Okay, Tracy, she's just stay trying to get me to be bloody like her so she will blow you read fun shit I did.

Hypothetically speaking, Yes, you could only read books for the rest of your life. Okay, but it's the same twenty books. Would you rather read those same twenty books or give up books and have unlimited television?

Tell me the same twenty books? Oh wow, I don't know. I mean your top three faves?

Do you enjoy reading books again? Is that I do.

I've just I'm new into the world of rereading in the last since in the last few years, I've reread a few books and I like it.

The only books that I have re read, and it was in my twenties. Wore those erotica books from back in the day, like reading Sister Soljia Coldest Once. Ever as an adult, I was I was like, now, bitch, why the fuck were you reading this at eleven?

Like literally everyone who comes on the podcast and talks about those books like I read them at ten, and I don't know why any adult was letting me.

Like, I know, literally, and I talk about it like in in in the in our book, I talk about my journey of erotica, and we'll talk about the history of erotica later, but I literally talk about going from books to message boards to just wanting to have my pussy thump while I read words.

Did you actually get horny at all? Or at talking to horns?

Moments of no holes word I'm guessing them now, Yeah, definitely that chapter.

Okay, we didn't get you off anyway, I'm sure that that's the color.

Sure that was where I think I put the most sexual detail sure.

The thing is that I'm reading for work, so it's a different I'm not like she used to masturmate it work.

I'm not. I'm not.

If there's a spectrum of like horniness, I'm probably not.

That close to you. Guys. Thank you, Thanks that I read the book. I knew she was like, I don't have to know. It doesn't leak all the time. I just say what I'm trying to say.

Since we're not shaming people for their sexual identities, lady, wow.

Just like not as sex forwards. Don't be like I hearing you say that, I would think, oh my god, I grow with book pod weepy girl, even though I know you're pretty beautiful. I meaning you, I'm like, oh, I see it. You see what I just see sexy in it? So to me, oh my god, I've clipped that and put it everywhere. I'm sexy. Thank you. Okay, not that nobody ever is like Tracy sexy.

I heard this thing from that, but I but also, when I'm reading for work, it's sitting up at the desk. It's not it's not even like taking notes. Yeah, I'm taking notes. I'm in and out of chapters. I'm thinking about questions. I'm thinking also, like what was this choice structurally? Like what like I'm I'm analyzing the thing, so I'm not really like enjoying the thing in that way.

Well, if you are a Horrehive member and not doing this for work, I need you to read the book like this. There you go in bed on your couch, just just be ready.

That actually doesn't here you get that horny, I get horny.

Or if I'm reading it in a public place, Okay, I gotta act you're a.

Public corny person.

Oh public you are. No, I know I read the book. We have a podcast, I'm i it's a little later. Sometimes we'll record the pot at like nine or ten am. This is why if you're watching on YouTube, we normally have coffee. We literally have to get this horny sometimes at nine thirty in the morning over coffee.

We're talking about day honest with you, doesn't take me much. Okay, No, I really need to hear this. Those in those twenty five books, twenty books, whatever it was. I really need to know the top three.

Because we the top three books that I'm going to pick to read for the rest of my life are my top favorite books because those are different book. But I want to tell you why this question is so important for me to hear. Every day online we see the same book circulating, even you bring it up Malcolm Bladwell, who was great, he's over here here, even everyone bringing up Coldest Winsterever when we talk saying what are the deep cuts?

We need? Deep cuts?

Okay, well, I don't know that those would be in my three Okay for the twenty My strategy for the twenty books, so I would the twenty book. The strategy for my twenty books would be to pick bigger books that are like really sort of dense, big story.

So I would maybe go like Count of Monte Cristo. Okay, that's too long.

Well, but I only got twenty books for the rest of my life, so I'm trying to maximize. I'm not going to go with the one fifty novels.

I'll say go ahead and say, Harry Potter, yes, well, I have never read those. You're a book reader. I have never fu k Rowlings. Well, and that's now why I haven't read them.

I didn't read them as a kid because I'm not older than them.

But I was a little bit older.

I was on the old end of when they came out, Like I think I was in high school when they came out.

Maybe so I was if you.

Were in middle school then to read after Erotica came Goosebumps, then came Babysitters Club, Had the then came.

Potter, not Twilight. For that reason, I didn't read Twilight.

I didn't read College and Twilight, but so I didn't read Harry Potter at the time. I also am not really a fantasy reader. My personal taste skews much heavy towards nonfiction, so it wasn't something that I would have read.

And then J. K.

Rowling is a fucking transphobic, cunt ass bitch, and I was like absolutely, And I'm just like, why would I go back now and support her?

Do you know what I mean? Like, it's like there's so many books in the world that.

I when I get the butter beer, you knowing her?

I mean, I think, I think you are bitch. I love world. I never Harry Potter thing.

It is cool for people to need, like not not just visiting, but like the what it created for people that feel community.

I think if you.

Love Harry Potter, if you already love Harry Potter. Like, if you are an adult who has was introduced to Harry Potter as a kid, it made you felt seen, it made you feel whatever. If it means something to you, that is your thing, and that's something you can grapple with. But for me, a full grown adult, I don't feel like I don't need to feel seen by a woman who's transphobic and hates so many of the people that I love existence and is putting money trying to make

I'll say, that's some of the that's there, right.

So I'm just like, why would I go back and read this bitch when there's so many great writers that I haven't read that I could read, you know, So like that's my thing, But you're a great.

Answer because we needed to hear that.

So okay, so we need the three that you said kind of run of Crystal.

I'm just okay. I also, this is really nerdy me.

I would take my Shakespeare complete works, my big giant Shakespeare with that's hard to hate it, Okay, I love Shakespeare. I think you would like it. You've been taught it, bere. I just went to Othello, and I was like, I heard that.

You could have only you could have said all this in one sentence. Why you like? It was just two fella's literally one of my fast Oh no.

No, I'm not gonna lie. I love her. Oh, I like it's so much drama in tea production. Denzel Washington, from what I've been told, is not a good production. He's too old to play the part. I love Denzel.

It's supposed to be like a twenty five year old man. There's ill shaved to me.

I just didn't like that they put it in modern day and then you keep the Shakespeare in play.

They had them in army outfits. I love Othello, and then.

Y'all, I I guessed it up in another episode. But also, oh basketball, oh my.

Josh Hartner. I love Julia the Woman. Okay, sorry, we are crazy.

Sorry I'm gonna say.

I'm going to say Song of Solomon by Tony Morrison. That's a juicy book. I think I could reread that about five to ten times back to back and find new things and feel new ways about it. So those would be my three, like Desert Island for unpacking purposes books, your three favorites we need, Okay, I'm currently I'm currently, like really obsessed with the Hunger game series. I read it in twenty ten or whatever. I don't but I read it in twos and ten and I loved it.

I love so good.

They are fantasy to me, but they almost feel more like speculative fiction. Like I know they're science fiction elements to it, but it feels so real and like rooted, and she just does such a good job.

And I'm just really into those right now. So right now the games.

One of my favorite memoirs of all time is a book called Heavy by Kisa Layman. You know, and then number three, number three, I guess, I guess I'll go Soula by Tony Morrison.

Okay, that's actually I can't, no, no, I got, I can't. I gotta.

I gotta take out Hunger Games because I'm being disrespectful to my actual like most favorite important book to me, which is Into Thin Air by John Krockaur. That's my gateway into nonfiction. It's about the nineteen ninety six trying to summit Mount Everest and lots of people die. It's like the deadliest year on Mount Everest. It was the deadliest year in Mount Everest history until twenty twenty three. But this writer, John Crocker, he wrote Into the Wild

He's like, my.

Favorite, right, I'm gonna I'm gonna geek out just a little bit. I'm gonna name my three real quick. Two of them actually came from childhood, Okay, that I was forced to read and I went back and reread them.

I love them.

So the Giver, Oh, we did that on the podcast Giver. I did my mom Incredible Animal Farm. I read that for the first time this year is.

Animal Wait, you just love Animal Farm?

In Oakland, California, we never required to read it, right in Florida, I mean, yeah, we read different ship.

I know I didn't. I didn't read a lot.

Of things that people were supposed to read, and the Animal I didn't especially like.

Where we're at now, it's like, oh God, oh fucking good. And then uh, nonfiction Oprah Winfrey is what I know for sure.

I never read it.

Girl, I do love Oprah, But that that one right there, Well, we were talking about the writing process for our book, the comps that kept coming to me, and the two memoirs by women that I liked and how they told their stories.

Was Oprah Winfrey what I know for sure? And then Gabrielle Union's We're Gonna Need More Wine one those per second one I didn't like as much.

Yeah, I couldn't even get into it.

I finished the We're Gonna Need More Wine like this. Yeah. So I was thinking, I feel like I want to go erotica. Just let me go erotica. Let's get reader. Oh you're going to go erotica?

Yeah, I thought you were so need to talk about erotica.

I was like, I don't know that. We're giving you the history of erotica. Can you get into a little.

Bit of the other stuff, but top to erotica.

I'll be faster.

We can get to it. Rent Boy by Gary Indiana. I love gay sex stories. I would say coldest one ever. Number two and number one for me is Tampas Nutting.

Yeah, something like that.

And I remember her last name being Nutting because I was like, that's nasty Tampa for me.

I like, fucked up. Give me incest, fucking.

Crazy shit because I'm so over sexed out sometimes.

And you gotta be shocked. It's got to go far. You just reading Animal Pharma is so crazy. Okay. So, and I hated the movie The Giver. It didn't do the book justice. Yeah, not good. I didn't watch it.

Real Street isn't it. I don't know, but they didn't do it General Street.

Why do I think Meryl Streep is in it? Fact check? I will. So we're going to go into our reactionary segment. We're going to play you a clip.

Okay, We're all gonna watch it, and we're going to talk about what the fuck we think about it.

Okay, and I do see a lot of black women that will hate on a black man for dat and a white woman, but if the white man dates a black woman.

He's almost praised for it.

I saw a guy the other day and his account was man seeking mananated women, and he had like three hundred thousand lives. If I was supposed that, I would absolutely be slandered. And I don't think there's anything wrong with any one dating anyone because we literally fought for unity and thought to be able to love each other. You do see that the contrast of when a black man dates a white woman, I'll get comment saying like it's a fetish to you, Like what, I can't just love somebody?

The world is full of hypocrites. If we want equality and we want everybody kumba, you can't be mad. If it's not everyone separate, then cool be mad?

Now is there?

Well? I don't like you talked about my ex. I don't know what the they just said.

Yes, no, I don't girl, Liz, I don't know what they say about Then as generation day conversation.

Well, we can also have a discussion. That's why I brought it up.

So when hearing people say shit like black love can be hypocritical or celebrating white men dating black women. Gabby Citibrate, her husband is white.

Yeah, he loves her. He'd be talking about her all the time. He loves her down and I'll have twins.

Shout out to her. She's a whore hive member. She'd be in our comments.

And I want to call a spades bade here. Gabby is plus eze and a dark skinned woman. She dated a white guy. I feel like we don't have a lot of conversation about black men and how critical they can be of dark skinned women and plus side.

As women when they go the other way.

Is there something you think that we're getting wires crossed me when it comes to white guys dating black women, because we do look at it.

Like, yes, this find the one who will love you. That was the first thing I did when I saw Gabby's man. But when I see black men and white women, I'd be like, you can.

Keep well, you know, so I should be transparent.

I am the product of a black man and a white woman, and my husband is white, so I am you know, pro miscegenation right there? Okay, loving mers Virginia big Fan, I think It's complicated because I think when we talk about these things broadly, I can have opinions, but personally that doesn't necessarily mean what like works for individuals, you know, like I'm not going to say that Gabriel Sidibe's husband is chasing Melanie and like, I don't know him, right,

Gotcha? Can you tell me how does uh you know?

In dating, we'll keep up with your husband fifteen years so such a long time. But is there a thing because I remember when I was dating everyone. I never really thought i'd really end up with a white guy, but I was dating for a long term.

If they dated a lot of.

Black women before me, that's a thing, yeah, I didn't like. But then I also didn't like if they've never dated a black person before. Tell me a little bit about what that was like with you today.

So I was very young when we met. I was twenty four. Okay, so I'm thirty eight for people doing the math, it's fine thirty nine this year. And I don't think i'd really thought about a lot of this stuff. I grew up in Oakland. I grew up in the Bay Area, lots of mixed kids. It's mixed kid capital at the Blaze, everything like the kind of if there's a possibility, we got it.

It's fusion. It's fusion cuisine over there.

And so I don't think I had thought about what it meant politically socially until after I was already with mister Stax.

Okay, I really had.

We met in twenty ten, and you know, we talked about this on my show about like growth and the ways you've changed, and when we met, like I really wasn't as politically mind died as I am when it comes to racial politics. This was this predates like Trayvon Martin, which for me was sort of like a big awakening

I never felt like the only one. I wasn't really answered because it's so honest.

We always want to hold black women super accountable for how things make them feel, and we don't really give black people a space to be like I didn't really know.

Yeah, yeah, you knew.

It's like well, and my so my dad, it was.

My dad black, and he was a lot older than my mom.

He grew up he was from Louisiana, part of the Great Migration, but grew up during you know, drim Crow Solevil rights. He was born in nineteen thirty five. Oh way, so he didn't get the right to vote till he was thirty thirty something. Yeah, right, like so like different era. And he always talked about like racism twice as good, like that whole thing. That was very much part in my mind, right, And it was like you gotta you have to have black friends, you have Like he was

My mom, right.

And I also remember being like he would like I remember the OJ trial being such a big deal to him, and like I remember years later I read a book about OJ, and I told my dad was like, I think OJ did it and my dad was like, I don't care. They planted evidence, they tried to frame him, and he deserved to get off.

And that was like a.

Huge moment in I think that was and eight thousand and nine, for the like one of the first times that it clicked to me what my dad had really been saying, right like that, It like that there was.

A political agenda, agenda, like a political worldview that was more input than any individual event.

And so that you know predates me having met my husband by a few years, but like all of that kind of coming together in that period of my life from like nineteen to twenty five was really when I started to think about race and like what it means to be mixed, and like what the what the political implications are of having a white mom and a black dad, right and all of these things and so and.

Now you're the opposite.

Now we're the opposite, right exactly. And people have a lot of opinions about my relationship and my upbringing and all of these things, and that is for them to have. I feel like, I don't know about you guys, but like it's hard to really think too critically about your racial identity when you're a mixed because I think it's I think it can be really uncomfortable. Like the fact of the matter is I have a white mom and a black dad, and there's nothing that I can do

God, Tracy, you know, mine is harder today than as a kid because I love my dad who is Israeli, right, and hate everything that's happening.

Right Well, I'm black and Jewish. Also my mom's Jewish, So I'm so I were flipped. Yeah, but I but we have this shared sort of free Palestine. And also this is part of I mean my mom is is uh European Jewish, not Israeli Jewish.

But but this is also a reason why.

And I'm joking and being facetious when I say this. I saw this stuff of doctoring Marvi and.

Like no rice, no ice, no spice, just you know, just black.

And I'm like, mixed kids are fucked up. Not one of my mixed hone girls, not one, not one has not expressed identity issues with me, hating their hair, being unsure feeling fucked up.

The ones with white moms genuinely.

Seemed to skew more into like this savior complex with certain shit with white people, and then the otherwise it's weird as fuck. And I think when you have parents of the same race, whatever they may be, Asian, Latino, whatever, there is something that's a little bit easier. And so then I would ask you just to wrap it. What is a difficult conversation you had that end well with your husband about oh my god, we're pregnant for raising these two mixed kids, how are we gonna do this?

Gosh, you know, I think like.

We've had so many conversations about race over the years, there isn't one that we had specifically about like the twins, because the.

Girls are boy boys, so they're well, eventually you'll probably have to talk to them about existing as black.

Sure exactly, and and they're extremely fair.

Okay that my my, this is so weird.

But like one of my bigger fears for them is that they're going to be in spaces where people don't know that they're black and they're going to experience racism like sort of like undercover. Oh, and I'm really worried about that, like I especially when they're younger, Like I think, you know, when they get older, they will understand, but I'm worried like the first time someone says something racist about black people to them, like out a sleepover or something, and.

They don't know that they're black.

Well they don't and they don't know how to respond, and they don't like and I'm worried. You know, think about being like eight and someone's saying something talking about your parent or something without.

This fear you have is real.

My boyfriend told me, he's like, it's always a mixed people that be going hard, like Angela Davis and Malcolm X and shit. He's like, this is why you're like this, because you existed in spaces where people were like I gonna talk about black people. Maybe she's seeing it, maybe

Because also, I mean, I think that they look black, and I think black people think that they look black, but I know white people don't can't tell.

That's like, Okay, hold on, is Rashida Jones black? She's black? Can we see? Yes? She looks black. I don't do it on the office, and now I see it every day. Rashida Jones looks black as hell to me on the office. I said it, did y'all see it? I knew she was before I ever saw.

The harness Rashida Jones on Black af Rashida Jones and other movies?

What was it? This is forty. You don't think she looks black? Bitch?

No, she if she walked in a room, you wouldn't think that's a black woman.

I would think she's spicy white. No, not black at all. She doesn't even black features.

She looks black.

Quincy Jones, that's Quincy Jones's daughter, that's Keydata Jones's sister.

Crazy her. And I don't think Megan Markle looks black? Okay you are? Are?

You know?

That is crazy? I look black and Megan Markle, bitch, you got me fucked up like you love gushed to meet fucking black Megan Marcle. That's why she exists as a passive woman.

She only even likes her blackness because of how she gets treated there and.

You're literally dying. One thing.

I have a I have a lot of thoughts about Megan Markle, But one of the things about Megan Markle that drives me crazy is she always talks about how nobody knows she's black, And I'm like, black people know you are black.

You're telling me this woman, don't. She could have passed.

She don't look black, couldn't pass. She could be a pass She could pass back in the thirties. She could have passed as a white woman like that.

Girl and still pull her up as a kid with her nappy hair. This is her hottest take of all time. This is what's not It is real. People is listening, like, you know, don't look like I literally, I literally when.

I saw her little documentary, I was like, Oh, you're only leaning into the blackness because now you're experiencing racism.

She's she was existing. There's a non black woman her whole live she was.

They only added the little the little Black Daddy because of Okay, wait, pa she don't look pause pause, pause pause when the announcement, did you know who she was before the announcement came out?

You did?

So?

You knew her from suit and she looked like white woman own suit. Okay, so I've never seen her, never heard of her.

Having a black daddy is saying a bo racial you never seen her. I've never seen her, never heard of her. The announcement comes out, Prince Harry is engaged. I see No, it doesn't say just as I Prince Harry is engaged.

I see her. I said, oh my god, we're going to the palace. She is black as hell.

To me, she could pass. That's what I hate about her is that she wishes she could pass. I'm like, we see you. My first comment and stunt. I watched close of her act.

Seeing photos on together, and I said, oh she was she was a little girl. I remember, she wish she was. I don't think she likes this. She's black, honey, don't matter. She don't look like.

I'm actually not gonna speak on a black woman not liking Macdemian black, but.

I'm saying, based off the documentary.

I saw, yeah, like she had that.

That's what I'm saying she also tried to be like, we never talked about race. Do you see what I mean? But that's what I don't.

That's something that makes me mad about her, because let's just do a little let's do her little dramaturgy.

Here.

She is forty one or forty two. I believe she's from LA.

She went to high school right kind of like oh my kids, Yeah, right north of Koreatown. She went to school right north of Koreatown, like on Western on your way up to Griffith Park. She would have been ten or eleven when the La riots happened. Don't fucking tell me you didn't talk about race when that was happening.

Also look how your mom looks.

You're not gonna tell me race wasn't talk about because you also are so much fatter than your mom.

Yes, there's not not that much but not that no, not that much of a black lady.

But there's always conversations and households. I know, me and my homegirl talk about like how her all of her siblings, they all have the same mom and same dad. She's dark skinned, So even within a household of different shades of brown, the conversation around.

Yes, race and skin. Yes, that's the part about her that makes me mad. Not even that she doesn't want to be black, like fine, whatever, that's if she If she doesn't feel comfortable, whatever, that's her thing, that's her journey. But don't sit here and lie on your mom and the fucking world in nineteen ninety two and like today, and then.

Followed up immediately by OJ, she's here in.

This city and hey, yeah, I ain't talk about no gad Yeah race you I know you fucking talked about it in class.

Probably all the white girls are probably so scared to go to Koreatown, right, like you know exactly, So.

It wouldn't do us justice to not make this episode about erotica, because literally, you know, when we're doing a pod together and you're like, let's do the cross what pot I'm like, are we gonna talk about twins, No, We'll talk about erotica.

OK, So I feel like I'd be better at twins than at erotica.

No, but the history of erotica is still is super interesting. So now in Decisions Decisions, we talk about the history of different elements of sex.

Yeah, and erotica is that.

So erotica took a hit during the Victorian era, which to me is no surprise because that's when you saw.

The course set taties.

So it says puritanical ideals were dominating mainstream culture so much that the novels became so taboo, considered low brow, and the quality of writing was dropping just because they thought sex was bottom tier. And so it didn't get to hit mainstream again until the twentieth century, when great writers Kate Chopin, Nabokov, Henry Miller began to publish more explicit books through traditional means. Since then, erotica is considered part of mainstream culture.

Romance is a top three book don't want to read.

And so the internet then took over culture climate, which made fan fiction should I used to read of erotica, And I must say I didn't even really think about fan fiction and erotica, but when we talk about history, it's such a big part of it.

It is in the book.

I believe it's my chapter around masturbation and loving myself. I joke that I used to sit at the computer and get fucking wet and sit in a puddle reading about getting a gang bang by the b two K boys Chris Brown and bow Wow, And I'm like, why the fuck was I thirteen wanted to be gang bang by all the guys that I liked. Listening to Girl making us on our Nie shows you how far the Internet has come.

We need so much now, not only porn. You gotta come out through AI, you gotta VR. Oh my god. I just saw okay, don't judge me.

So on my following tab because all I do is follow porn stars on X. I came across the AI pictures of porn and so it's these women that literally lay like this, and so it's big titties and a leaking vagina with the Buddha hole just winking at you.

I was still turned on.

I was like this AI image of this thick bussy leaking pussy, but them.

I love. I was like, I don't think I red. Is it because they look perfect?

Bitch?

Perfect? Okay, see I get turned hard flaws. I'm talking like I need a little cell you like, and it was.

Oiled up, bitch, I said, I might have book marked it. That shit looked so good.

Damn Tracy times to get uncomfortable, book girl.

If you had to get off from some porn, would you rather read it or watch it?

Hmmm?

I think read because then you can sort of imagine.

M Yes, I think like like because I feel like sometimes when you watch, like something will happen and I'm like, oh, I don't like that, Like it'll like get in the way.

And I feel like when you're reading, like I don't know, it allows you to imagine this.

Yeah, yeah what e Rodica has made you feel that way where you were like, wow, this is that powerful. Now I'm thinking, okay, don't judge, don't judge me, don't judge me me.

The first time I ever read something where I was like was fifty Shades of Gray? Really, but this was fifteen sixteen years ago. No, but that's so so.

I was like real, I was really into the like rich rich, rich, rich, dumb thing. I was like, this is great. No, wonder that was my favorite chapter here, yours wasn't rich like that. It wasn't like I'm really well, it wasn't rich like yeh wasn't he wasn't a Christian,

I was like excited by it.

I'm only gonna agree with you as well because for me, the way my mind and pussy worked together while I read Addicted by Zane, and the way it didn't translate for me in the film, like, I was really glad that they had bors Kujo.

Let's be very clear that Nigga is fine.

He was black and black, he looks black mixed, right, he is, He's German, He's from German, right. If him and his wife want me to join and will anytime of else and he.

Ti they could be a couple of seven if they wanted.

But when the movie came out, it didn't even feel as sexy and and addicted was I probably read that after your Coldest Winter Ever, and addicted got me obsessed with all of Zane's books. Went from that to Chocolate series, that chocolate, you know, all the things, and I was like, Wow, this movie failed in the sex department for this book that was literally all set.

But that's the thing too, It's like it's so imaginative, right, i'mlike, with fifty Shades of Gray, you've being able to do that.

For me, reading Fifty Shades of Gray enjoyed it. I had read so many really kinky books. I would go to a banned book section and just keep digging, right, And I think I got excited by fifty Shades even though I was super young, because I knew everybody else would now get it.

Yeah, And so that's what I think was beautiful about that. Oh, I really want to talk about the most famous piece of erotica all time.

We all know it. Do the Kamma suture?

Oh yeah, Yeah, So we did a whole episode on that as well.

Ancient India.

It was written and the Western world incorrectly regards it as a manual for sex physitions, but there are seven books that make it up, and it's so much more philosophical than sexual, and eroticism plays an undeniable role in it, obviously because it's taught us so much about love, connection or just free for all sex, like it covers everything.

We also see a.

Lot of erotica. I've never heard of this, but shunga. Thousand years ago there was an art tradition called shunga in Japan, which were colorful images of lovers with super large almost calmon gold genitalia, and it was spread across the audience to Japan and then China. It would literally be this is a woman bending over as a client lubricating a meal prostitute. These would be hung up not only throughout the town but through transit in books everywhere

It's so funny because I'm.

Like, I don't get this, because you know sometimes when the words a little too much not for you. I start going through this thing and I'm like, they're literally talking about the statues in Rome, the dicks, the balls, the hair on it, all of it. All of this was erotica in Italy.

There's some fucking hot statues.

There's one not okay, this is it's unconsensual, so don't get out to me. But there is a statue. I no, there's a statue of I think it's called the Rape of Persephone. Oh wow, and it is. I think it's

To me, it's crazy because most statues that I see, like especially when they're dude, my eyes go right to the dick and the dix be small on statues, like they don't ever.

Like they're like, damn, how much a little bit material right here? Yeah, like all embarrassing.

Maybe Dick's grew over time, like Jesus they said, yes, maybe not showers, but can you have him hang a little bit, he's a great god, can we give him something curious?

Okay?

So erotica's evolution is interesting because it says, what's the difference between art, erotica, the Little Her, and porn? And where it gets murky is the word pornography didn't exist until the eighteen hundreds, and when society became obsessed with labeling pornography, it was because they didn't consider it to be art. And so I find that funny because it's almost like the whole hierarchy back in.

The day, like, oh well, our statues of sex are better than you actually fucking on camera is basically what they were all saying. And so now today the concept of pornography is not considered erotica because they're the censorships around.

I will say it's crazy because.

In the book I talk about how meeting a community of people that viewed sex's art helped to transform my brains to view it that way. I didn't think that nudes or porn or any of that was art until recently.

Sure and interviewed a friend of ours. She's a porn star sinceon in Love she's doing like catalogs, Like I can't think of what she's doing, but she's basically finding porn archives and she's bringing them to Harvard and having people study about it. It was Harvard, right, she says that Harvard already has it exists there, Oh, Harvard already has.

She's doing something she's.

Doing another college's not it, but just pulling the archives. And even I'm sitting with her and this friend of ours, we love her. I'm like, what college, Like, how do you really connect the dots with this?

But at the end of the day, it is part of our art history.

Yeah, for sure. I mean there's so many things that got short shrift Shakespeare wind say culturally that are like that's so important and was labeled one way or another and then made it taboo or like off limits. Yeah, clearly porn is one of them. And I think erotica and erotic lit also, just like to stay on my thief.

It's so crazy because I can't remember what I was having this conversation with. But those are even separate in bookstores. So you have romance, which is more about love, yes, and then erotica.

But but a lot of romance.

Books are now bringing in more so they have like closed door romance or open door. So open door means you have the sex scene. Closed door means like we made out and then he pushed me on the bed and slammed the door, and then it's like the next morning I woke up.

Yeah, And so if it's open setscene jraycy uh.

He pushed me on the bed and then we jumped to chapter. But that's that'll have. I mean, the thing that's so interesting in romance books also is it's like my heat or like they won't say they don't a lot of times they don't say anatomical body parts or or even words like they won't say pussy. They'll be like he was patching, he felt my wet or was between my legs.

I tried to do a little of that. I know it was tough.

Yeah, I mean there's a lot of synonyms. Okay, there's a lot of creative language happening.

Oh that's where and I used to talk about it all the time. Zaan for the buddhahole would call it a chocolate starfish.

So even though she even.

Though she definitely wrote pussy this for the asshole, she referred to it as a chocolate starters.

Some things.

I found some passages of erotica over time, and it's it's just crazy how shit changes. But this is in classical literature, and just like Tracy saying, let's.

See if it makes that pussy throat okay.

Then late one night, as he was undressing for bed, she tapped at his door timidly. She wanted to relight her candle at his, for hers had been blown out by gust.

It was her back night. She wore a loose, open flannel, her white in steps shone in the opening of her fur slippers, and blood glowed warmly behind her perfume skin from her hands and wrists to as she lit and steadied her candle and think perfume arose. He came forward, that is exactly what you just said.

This is what time period is this? I mean there were censorship rules like you couldn't say things. So I think like the furry is saying a lot, there's a lot of words that are doing a lot of work in that passage slippers, right, but just like the no no she said, like text, like the words that are being.

Used, the perfumed skin exactly.

There's a lot of the scriptors the loose fitted and he undressed. It was her bath night, so that like continuated.

And also also nudity night is such an interesting thing because you remember they wouldn't do it all Dagura Sharon i WA's what it doesn't say the year, but it's called Dangerous Liaisons by Pierre Oh yeah, so I'm famous.

That's that's what cruel intentions it is based off. Oh yeah, and there's a Dangerous Liaisons movie.

I think you shall fight for them. Yeah. I didn't watch it though, but I know Sean Wro It's always suggested to me. Okay, this one is literally about stealing virginity. I think I shall possess this woman, bless you, thank you. I shall steal her from the husband who profanes her. I will even dare ravish her from the god she adores. What a delight to turn her into an object. Far be it from me to destroy the prejudices which sway her mind. They will add to my happiness. Let her

This don't sound like virginitay, you like you're going to slot out the moodys, Ryan Phillip, your character.

And let me tell you this right now, that was one that was one white boy they used to have me, Ryan Philippi.

Girl, white boys didn't even go to my school. Was that of that era?

When I tell you Ryan Philippi was a cute little I said, this is the American white boy.

That's Ryan Phillip. That's cute. He was cute. What's happening? This is my American was married to what's her face?

That's Witherspoon's ex husband intensions. You gone.

I feel like recently he don't look as good as he did back in the day. Oh my god, he aged like.

That bitch right now, Petro Pascal no no I was thinking about someone from the back of the day.

Linda love Hand got that same Christian.

And look how good he used to fucking look was do you want to hear?

Bro?

Ryan Philippi looked like milk.

I always I always liked I didn't like Leonardo DiCaprio.

Oh, love LYO, lovely girl. I wanted.

I wanted little me in a car like he Oh my, that was suggestive sex. That was sad.

I'm sorry.

Oh yeah, hand the hands, handing, saw nip and draw.

Yeah, we saw the whole That was a sexy fucking scene. Oh my god, I love that. Now, I do want to know we're talking about all these white people like this. Well you said it was your white boy. That's why I went to be there.

And we're really gonna be honest here, like a lot of the black sex movie scenes came so much later from.

Yeah it is.

And also, I mean it should be said that erotica, at least in literature black books were really stigmatized, like.

They want the soldier was and she where he draw?

I think for me though, to like black erotic literature always and maybe it was the ones I like to read, but it is thereo typed Black people are so bad, like there was always gang's drugs, violence, death, then sex.

And that also has a lot to do with just the world of publishing and racism, in.

Which makes sense.

But a lot of the books that I read there were drug dealers, they lived.

In the projects. Even even once they lived in the projects, she met midnight.

I hate that all my black love stories were traffickers because if I think about my.

Favorite black sex scene ever of.

Movies, Baby Boy, I never saw it. So I used to like love and basketball. I think that I don't know as an adult, I have not want gone back. Do not go back.

I'm not going to go back.

I'm really mad that a movie that is a classic that I love, I watched it recently.

I was like, it's justly your favorite movie.

Now I hate you about this short only because I was the Air Force, and that's why I really want to talk about more porn, erotica, dirty shit with you because they're such a nice woman. But fe tale everybody where to find you and what they can expect.

Listening to Stax pod.

You can find me at the Stacks podcast on Instagram, the saxpodcast dot com. I do a weekly show. It's about books. You can find me talking about books. Honestly, you're not gonna find me talking about pussy. Yeah, don't worry, there's hard They only have us for that. Yeah, you already have your your pussy place. The pussy palace. I'm more of the page's palace, if you will.

However, we did an episode so if you don't to hear books and plenty, Okay.

The thing about my show that I feel like is really fun for people and fun for me is that all sorts of people write books, and so I get to do an episode with you all where I talk about sex and friendship and a running all these things. And then you know, I think the week before you're or no, sorry, that's not true because this is come out in July. I think that, like, you know, around the time that your book comes out or your your episode comes out. Got an episode about a thriller coming out.

We did, you know?

We're doing all sorts of books, and I'm trying to, you know, highlight different kinds of literature and get people, you know, in April we do poetry months because it's

They don't not understand and read books, and now they do. We don't wrote it, you wrote it, you read it.

Yeah, So I want people to feel like I always say I'm the dumbest person in the room, like when I'm talking to these people who have pull zerprizes, and I'm like, so, what kind of smacks deally? You know, but like it's also all nervous too. It's like I want people to feel welcome into the book world, and there's enough books for it.

That's why people love THEO and Donald Trump. We need to see human granular.

Level that shit. Don't compare me to Donald Trump, but otherwise that's yeah, that is life. THEO is so great. I hate him for what he did. I really think it contributed to the vote.

But being a good interviewer is asking shit no one else on their pressa uruant you did from Andy and I so thank you.

Oh good, I got a good questions. So you guys, yeah, how did we write the book?

Like when you said, how down to where we did it laptop phone?

It was such a great question.

Thank you, thanks my goods, Well, thank you guys for having me. This was fun by everybody. Go and check us out on feature on dot com, backslash Horrible Decisions from more juicyt and come see us on tour. We tournbitches an HB tour dot com. We are bringing the book from the pages to the stages in a city near you. Do not forget to fucking join us on tour a n HB tour dot com and get your book.

Will say so, Hi,