Ep 209: Blind Sex (Ft. C-Note)

But I'm so high. This is a lot of insight, no pun you know what I'm saying, because I feel like get I meant no, because um, he did a consult with me for his new podcast blind but now I see he was bugging on the first name. But we got with But yeah, I really wanted to have somebody on. And I feel like I can't use the

word disability, but you're visually impaired. And it's so interesting to me to have this conversation because we hear so many things about We just had a guest a few weeks ago to talk about sensory deprivation and how she was blindfolded and ship and how things are heightened and I think it's gonna be so dope to just learn about you your sexual experiences. I know you may not talk about sex too much on your pod, but like anything,

but like, yeah, this is just really exciting for us. So, um, can you introduce yourself, tell people what you do, and just a little bit about your story on yeah, how you lost your vision? Well, my name is c No. I called myself blond Poppy, blond Poppy to her Ray Charles like, I'm I'm a party promoter. So pretty much nine years ago, I was shot three times being wrong but they was trying to wrong me and shot me

three times, left me there to die. Pretty much seven days in the hospital, four days I see you, three days recovery. That's it. And I told my mother mouth I got to get him to my son. Doctor said he couldn't come up, that he was one years old. Oh I thought your son. I have misunderstood when I met you from of your son was not nine. Okay, so you've seen your son, Yeah, I'm sure this first birthday. Wow wow, So when when this happen survived you gotta

take away some sins. So okay, I totally misunderstood. So you had your son you get out your blind I know you told me a little bit briefly about how you did anger management while blind, but just from a sex perspective, like how long did you go before you even want to have sex or could? Yeah? I came, Oh, I wasn't even a hospital. I said worked. I strayed up in that toil the doctor it ain't working. It

ain't even that's what you said. That's you were in the hospital just from being shot, and your concern was whether you would get hard again. And you took my eyes. I don't want to know what else you took. That's going ain't no use. What was the response, like, how was I mean what the doctor's response when I said doctors response to that? He was like, pretty much your body going through trauma. Got to see a couple of days and started moving. I'm like, I'm good to go. Wow,

I went home. That's extra first day, won't the first day? You think it was sympathy pussy Yeah, I had a whole lot of that. The whole lot of that sympathy if you're not getting pussy shot everybody, Okay, I did na that got shot. We know you like niggas asleep with guns. And that I'm gonna him anyway. But I was like, see him you hurt? So wait the sympathy pussy that you were getting, was it girls who already had sex with girls are sex with girls that dubbed

me before. But I wanted to see what it was about. Huh they thought it changed, Like I hear the way this question is, you know the whole lot, You still know what you're doing, And I'm like, what should be confusing to the after? Then it's like, yeah, you do know what you're doing. Stef pussy is not confusing though. All you gotta do is the legs. That's it. But I'm not but a new pussy the same anatomy brow pussy be kind of different because I now it ain't hard.

I'd be hesitating. You can't see that ship, so it's not like you don't know what the got bumped on there was Oh my god, didn't be nervous. It's your sense of smell like crazy now, yeah, the touching taste, but like with pussy specifically, yeah, I could definitely smell it if it ain't something guy ain't doing it, Damn I keep spell us. Yeah, and I'm nervous. Was just look, look, we just said the way the way we were sweating last show, just white took some wet white, some unarmed,

so it was a little much. I do want to start with some icebreakers, and one of the first ones you almost told me saying wait till that was not an icebreaker, bro. Hell no, that's how we jumped out the gate. How long you've been listening to our shows? You know, for a long time. Stay in the house and just listen. So my first icebreaker question for you is what do you think we look like? Tell me this, I think you slim a caramel color. You're giving her way too much melon at bit slim carmel color. I

like a little booty, very little accurate. It's a medium, Mandy. I say, carmel kind of showing thick, kind of short and think he had that right. Huh. Well, the anything I'll tell you, I think that really might help you think about what I look like. We always kind of have the same Like I wear braids a lot. I realized that how podcast. Listen to the podcast, I'll be talking about them. You said there and said, braids is you?

That's true? Mandy? Who knows what? Nobody knows what? I'm a look like when I come in, I ain't gonna hold Sometimes you got a wig, sometimes you got short. Oh that's right, I was talking about that different. See, he'd be listening. Ladies. You may just need a block because they listen. Damn, you you're a good true Do you notice that with yourself? Do you feel like you're like paying extra attention? I feel like way more attention now. Damn,

probably sniggers and lies all the time. Didn't you tell me that all the time. That ship was two years ago. I still remember what you said all the way. That's crazy, like you can't write it down or you can't see it to keep going over it. You play that in your head over time. Yeah. I um. When we did our console, I've been leaving people notes like written, and I was like, well, let me do this different with you know, and I did a voice note so that

he listened to it. And I was thinking to myself, like, how annoying is this gonna be if he got played? Nah, listen to it like times. Really they don't get annoying. It's like a talking book. Honestly, I'm I'm really excited to listen to your podcast because it's so interesting to me, you know, like we were just saying when we spoke, like you don't really meet a lot of blind people. Maybe you'll come across them, but like, how many conversationally do we have? Never even befo I went blind. I

really did see a lot of a lot of people. Yeah, And I mean it's just just it's different. So you don't you don't meet more people now that you're blind. Na, you don't like when you get a pt cruiser than all you notice is it's not It's not like that would be until like hearing I went to some blind incot management that it was just straight blind people in there. It was just like you didn't like No, I finished the class. I had no choice. Why are you and

my cousin was not playing that? Yeah you want to bug out, let's go. How long did it take you to stop being angry? The first six years? I was angry? Wow? First six years? Every night? And then you do something I don't like. I would snap ship is like, treat me like I'm I'm regular, So don't tippy toe around me, don't lie, keep it round because I'm angry. I'm not gonna beat you up. I'm gonna just distance myself from you.

What's crazy is everyone that I think we've even interviewed that has some form of a disability that's been like their number one request, treat me like you would anybody the funk else. So that's why we talking that you are here with I had niggas wearing that little hoodie back and you know what I mean. And CJ don't have fights. My mother still cursed me out. Ain't any changed good? So CJ, treat your brother who's your eyes?

Pretty much? Right? Yeah? That's so let's talk about when you meet somebody, do you give c J all the credit to tell you he straight up a dad tell me. Sometimes it depends if I'm drunk, I don't care. I mean I don't care. Sometimes I don't care. I can't see. Did you ever watch the movie Shallow Hell? So it's a movie. Yeah, yeah, I seen that they in his eye they look skinny, but really they have you said

it all? Yeah? Okay, but don't you feel like that's like a blessing that disguise that some Yeah, but then sometimes it'd be like NI, your friend b what you're doing, bro? And I'm like, what what I'm doing? To me and they don't got no face too. I can't see the ship, bro, I can't see the shape but my right here? He like not can't let you go out like that? Bro? No, that's no now that can let you go out? Like? What did you say? You ain't never met a real

funny bitch? I did? I met all different type of girls being block. So that's interesting because I wonder if that's are ego, Like do you think that knowing not even being able to see that someone's attractive knowing they're attractive weighs that much? Mm hmmm. I can said you probably like a personal Yeah. Do you feel like you've been having more intellectual conversations women like you've been getting closer to them? I ain't someone mat straight dub after

the two weeks? Where are you dubbing bitches? And tell me when you hit me with that? Send me a cat? What cash apps? I can't do, cass. I like that they don't treat you different, like what you got money? You ain't getting settlement to be different. They come to me like they had talked like money. What I'll be right back? I spent off his over. Do you find it like when dating though, like, what's just something common

that happens with women. Do you think that you become almost like a fetish Do you feel like girls want to know what it's like to somebody blind because you like, you know, I had a couple of girls that yeah I ran into that was like that. But it was like, oh, yeah, you're definitely like I see you more into it. You're us your hands more. It's passion but it's really like, I'm not trying to be passionate with you. You just need to do this stuff. Just get it off and

I'm out. Have you ever had like a threesome or sex with yes before? Have you had it before you were blind? After after but he can't all the put like they just don't need to talk to this man like he blind anymore. He gave let's just talk about because I'm be read at you. Like for me in a threesome, there's a lot of ship you gotta watch out for, like his legs flying and ship like you're telling you after that, I can have a foot hit

me in the face. You can't complain after that. I also want to know, out of the two of us, you've been listening for you said it basically since we started right, So what guess did you think was the sexiest based on listening? Oh, I ain't gonna live after last week? What's that? The pussy poet? Poet? This is different? Right here? She was talking some ship that should make like, close your eyes you can imagine everything. Yeah, she did a really good story. She did. I can see liking

if I just had to listen to her. Yeah, just a voice. She does have a good voice, because switch it up. It's just different, even still different. You can see it better even though I can't see. I still close my eyes division Maybe no, I didn't that you feel like when my eyes open, I really don't see it. Now we were talking about one of the segments for your show. We could maybe make um dumb questions. I don't know if you still want to do that, but

let's ask Chris. Sorry, see know some dumb dumb ship. One of the things you said you felt like was dumb that people ask you is are you really blind? But I think really what they want to know the hand in front of my face. No, it's like I think, really that question is more so, how blind are you? So when you're seeing? What are you seeing? Like? I know when I close my eyes, like it's like spotty okay, light and shadow, light and shadow like a brightness? Is it? Like?

So you should see weezy because she bright? Right. I just want to let you know. You know, you could ask the j later. I am the darker one now I'm real time times, you know, in this crucial time or when you know we both crucial time. I win up, they might be like is she or ain't she until they see our edges. Um. Yeah, so you're seeing shadows

and lights. Um. So does that mean when someone's in front of you, you know they're approaching from just that movement of a shadow or from the perching when the perching approaching. I could feel it. So it's like my ass closed. I mean somebody getting close. Yeah, so I can feel with somebody walking on the side of me. You can't creep on me. I hear it. Do you

think you always? I feel like we all kind of I'm about to say that my panting house has been a bit can't ship, but I hear about to come out. Now you can when you want the dog. It's even more stronger. Yes, you can't creep because I feel you're coming from a Crystal Street. Yeah, and I heard people like you know what you're talking to him? Like, bro, I know who he was before you walked up on me. Think looking at your phone, I don't know nobody touched

my phone. Still he's still a nigga. I don't like that my phone sleep under me, like my phone because like I can't go through your phone and said, are you going through my facts? That's really true? And less we called my brother in the room and he told me, with whatever you'd be doing for him, I need you to stop. They still ain't gonna be ship now. I haven't seen it all, Like I didn't see I'm nade on the girl lap and I'm like, what you're doing? Not on Facebook? But same, just like no, I know

she's not. I snatched it and I'm like gonna said, we re message to a whole nigger. So it was like what then you sorry? Sorry? What you got caught by block? Honestly, that's really fucked up. I'm off this called yo, bro, come pick me up. Bro, that's just two things out there just dropped you off. You want us to beat her up? Now? She cool? Because that bit tried it so with the phone like using your phone, You've got social media, you have shipped like that, You're

talking to Serie the whole time. What about when you want to say something nasty, because I'm sure this moment respond to it. You don't need voice now. So I feel like I couldn't tell Sirie. I called that whole a bit and she was like, I'm sorry, I don't like that language. Serie, SERI what saying? So you said, yeah, she would I think pronounce She's definitely pronounced nigga. Really

does she better try c J? Can you like, I'm in the text or maybe you could text him first of all while we're getting vanilla ship, but I want you to text him some wild ship. You text his phone and once we're going through the vanilla ship, Tex texting wild should be like you want to come over night and out this. She's really gonna say it too, but oh no, no, I like, damn nigga. All right, while he's tiping that up, we're gonna get to our

vanilla ship. This one's from the cut this week. This one I thought was really interesting, just to spark some comment with us France, the country is finally setting on an age of consent and The age they're choosing is to better protect children against sexual abuse, and they're setting an age of consent to fifteen years old. Um, basically, there wasn't an age, so fifteen is frankly what they

find to be a good age of consent. Um they don't currently have one, like I said, so there really wasn't anything they can do, but they basically now can criminalize sexual relations with a minder who are under fifteen.

And I wanted to ask y'all what you think of I think the beteen is weird and I still can't look at no. Yeah, and also like even even going back to just conversations that we've had when we were having uh sex, even at sixteen, seventeen or eighteen, I still feel like there were decisions that were made that we're made only because you just were young. You didn't know, and I do think that there were men that took

advantage of the naivety of being that young as well. Like, so I don't know fifteen to me, however, if you look back on like again, because sex is nothing new back in the olden times, you would get married and wet off at twelve or type of But see, I think fifteen isn't bad if it's kids having like to get like if they're working around together, Like if you're both to you know, freshman in high school and y'all start sucking, Like what what? What can you really do?

How can you stop that? Yeah? But to be fair as as women, as girls, even society, like you go after the older guys so to be like when we were in high school, we were dealing with older guys. And it's funny because I just had this conversation too, and it made me look at it weird. Even club scenes, you could be eighteen enough for women in the club,

but the men had to be twenty one enough. They're literally like these overdrawn like instances where they almost push women to be with older menen the idea that we mature quicker, Like it's all fucking fluff, because there's still in terms of conversation and one needs to be had with sex. No, no, we're not ready. We just talked about a couple of weeks ago how even women don't talk about their periods enough, and and the health surrounding

women and STDs and all that. It's not talked about enough. So not fifteen. To me, it's crazy, Chris, when you were working in the clubs and I know you still do parties, Like, did you ever find that like girls were like hella fucking young? Did you ever have sneaking in where? I know where were your parties that Brooklyn, Manhattan? You pay the bouncer you getting in? Yeah, so it doesn't matter. Did you think that did you find it was mostly the women paying the bouncer? Are like the

dudes that brought him mostly to women. They they like three of them. That's twenty one. But you got the tool that's not on my birthday next week. But I left my d home. You got to do a show, get a bounce of you ain't he don't care. Yeah, it's twenty the deal. I feel like they definitely charged a little bit more than that. We never got away with it. No, I didn't tell you real quick what they did because they did this a lot to you, bro. They did it in Orlando, m Miam because I don't

have a good liar phase. She doesn't that nigga. We went to the club one time and we shouldn't have been there. We did have school the next morning. This nigga broke her idea and half gave it back to her and said you got school in the morning, you should go home. And I was like, damn bitch. She was like, don't worry. I know the owner of this. So we we did. It was like what Vincent. It started with bro you you was yeah. And then let

me also tell you. We drove all the way to Fort Lottadale to go to Cheatah's one toime Andy to tell them we was like sixteen seventeen club. Yeah, Cheetahs is like everywhere, It's like a franchise. We went all the way to four a lot of deal to go to Cheetah's and they looked at this one. She always sucked us up. They looked at Wesi was like mm hmmm, this ain't huh. She not. We can't let her in. So then we had to drive another four to five minutes to Miami to go to the Cheetahs in Miami

and somehow they let us in there. But I think we were at West Pam for the first and then okay, yeah either way, just act like I was back then. But let me tell you really how I got away with some ship. So so you know, I was in Hawaii, um this past week and while I was there. I don't know if you've heard, but I don't have a license. But my nigga, she now I got her confidence, you know what I'm saying. And just like the New York I d it looked just like the New York license.

And I was thinking to myself, I'm really gonna get this hooper? Am I gonna get a mother fucking convertible? So I went right up to the budget counter and I was like, look, I don't have a lot of time. I just need we got to work quick, so please just get me a deal. Here's my stuff, here's my credit card, Like I was trying to put more focus on the car. And then nigga didn't even see the ship.

So now if I could have been in my body, then bitch, we would have been in all thee That's what you got to do when you talk like you all get on the phone giving them the I D like I used to do what I used to be eight nineteen kidding. Can't get in the clothes with anybody else. They do past me day back up, I dam act like I'm on the phone arguing that's really smart. They just go ahead after while, you see me every week

you like. Now you're good. Just let me search your glad going, let me search you ship then check out I d no more. Wait uh you got it ready? Now let's hear this is listen. Mary got to not say none of this ship because we know Serie white, so she better say in word. Wait wait wait, really closer to it. Just put it right up to your to the mic read message. CJ sent a new message, damn man, and my nigga needs some pussy. Would you

like to fly? No? No, maybe she's mixed, she said, Dan, I am man, and damn that because she'd be saying the funniest ship when it's like day. They really said the N word, said the words, lady, I really go the hell? I don't know I feel and we can't talk to Steve So who we talked to about this. That's why I said Steven So who we talked to? I only know Steve is that who we talked to. Now, okay, and Tim Tim clearly Tim Tim. I just feel like you guys have been making You've been making a lot

of white phones. Let's be honest, different colors. I don't really understand. What I do know is the bitch I need a face to sif they got a dope interview with Sirie the voice behind Sirie where she says, I guess they asked her something like I could be misquoting it, but they're like some of the things you say, it sounds like you're being me. And she was like, I was really tired of recording. We were doing it all day.

It's like a voiceover. She's like some of them may who came off like that because she's like, we had eight hour days because there's a lot of shows. She was saying, we're like, okay, well, all right, that right, if it's been done. I wonder have you ever thought about changing your series m accent nine you one time they had a man voice. I at the man voice manfore in the morning. If you're not doing that, you're

too close to it, all right? For our Jamaican accents on the GPS literally like that's that's back when, like our phones didn't have all of the things that asked now and you had to buy a GPS to tell you where to go. Yeah, man, I'm just driving. They did offer me a GPS with my non license. Having asked, I was like, I'm cool and um, here's our horror derb. So this one is interesting, is fun because I've never even heard of this ship. Really, try a nipple toy

that isn't just a nipple clamp. No shade to the clamps, but there are tons of toys. Pause ice cubes. That's the only thing I can think of that goes on nipples for nipple play besides the nipple clamp. And see note what what could you think of before you go through the list? What could you think of it as something to play with your nipples besides the nipple clay? I used fruit? Yeah, I use fruit, like my mouth fruit maybe like a chocolate or some ship you can

lick it off. I can see that food. Not fruit. What fruit you're gonna put on the nipples? You though you put the peach in your mouth? Your mouth waited? Could you think of something for for nipples other than a nipple clown? Gotta go bro? Alright, nigked what look you to and you attach it to the nipple? Alright, y'all are really this is random? But do you watch porn?

And if so, what like does he watch port? Well, he says he's been saying, yeah, but like, what kind of like ship do you need now do you have like certain because it sounds so like what do you find yourself typing in because you're not visually Like, sorry, I was looking at you. You look up you look up his porn for him? Oh no, I mean you right, So you're watching porn still, so listen to it. Yeah, so like what do you need to see? Like I

mean what, sorry, you know what I'm saying. I just type in loud Cherokee because you remember he just still Just that's the visualization because you know their voices. Even you hit it, you hit them the climate hit that you need to glas. That's mad funny to me. So like even I don't like that this bitch like that Megan it Starue. So I'm like, Dan, this ship remind me of you know, you would love me if you

like Cherokee mag Way fun of me. She's like, you know one of the things I said about her recently, So a lot of like you, of the girls that we've seen on Instagram and ship like that today just have such fake looking bodies. Not that they're not good, but they're just too perfect. Like Meg don't have like a but she just got a little bit like it's not a board flat stomach, which makes me feel like, oh my gosh, she looks like she saw you know what I mean. I think that ship is like super important.

Um so what is the nipple toys? Nipple suction toys, nipple liquors, vibrators for nipples? Okay? Really now I could see that maybe like a cockering like on your nipple picture, like you just wrap it around right, wrapping around, No, you wrapping around like a little suction tongue. And it liked it pretty much go up and down. Well, I

got that like my towels in the bathroom. Basically that has like a little cup and then I hang this towel on the cup so I could just take it off and use it as a nipple thing, you know, anything to save a little cash. And then it says you could use massage, oil or lube, but the cup. I am not mad at that ship dog like I would use a suction cup. So we don't have a black s excellence today. But I did want to honor Michael B. The Jordan's Umil. Valentine's Day was a few

weeks ago. Yeah, he paraded around a black woman because we said that he date white women. But this I set down those white women so fabulously. I'm only bringing this up because I want to know a sea over two. So Michael B. Jordan's he rented out an aquarium and then eight then ate seafood. That is awful people in front of day cousins. Ro That is trifling if you

really think about it. But is it bit because I'm telling you, like bro, you eat a seafood many so you'll never go get seafood by the water when you at the beach. But I can't see the fish. The fish is looking at me eat din. But you know, thinking Michael B Jordan, Rachel I probably got you know, some nice big sharks and shade. He probably has shrimp brands.

You know. Nah, we gotta make him the Black sex List because I know that every like every time I see a picture of them, they look good as and he got his bitch stocks, you know what I mean. So if you could have an unlimited amount of money, because that's really what this nigga got, even though he's attractive, it's really the money for me, what would you do? What would be your Valentine surprise? Like? What do you think of how you go all out, but depends along

on widow. How long you gotta like start? Men definitely care about that it's about, but it's might depend how bad bitches too, definitely don't. It don't matter to him? Definitely. I can't see this right. What's one who's one of the most two or three months and it's like I'm buying you stock and all that. Now I'm not doing that, That's what I'm saying. But you but we ain't got We can't talk like that because we ain't got unlimited money. Dog, even if I do got it, I'm still not doing it.

You sing you what's the most guy? Lorie Harvey and Michael b Jord. She just finished the Future? How do you know that he likes? He like he'd be like, hey man, what's going on on the shade wrong? Listen to the Breakfast Club every morning. Breakfast Club is some great report, Angelie. Let you know what's going on. I ain't mad. I'm not doing that. Okay, how much money I got? Now? You gotta work for this, honest, you know you ain't seeing it doesn't matter. Who's the baddest

bitch that you've ever seen? Train Lisa Ray Lisa Ray is definitely OK. Yeah, I'm like Triana is still a bad bit she is. I've seen a couple. I had a couple that do means ship. Though I work all for this. He was not running me when I was playing Get Them too Much Stocks two days stocks, you're tripping. I'm just saying you wasn't with me in Black Panda. I work on for that black pan to work with

getting that money that easy. Um, I want to get into the horrible decisions and start just like from the beginning. So you said your son was one. I don't know why I thought you hadn't seen your son. But tell us, like about your baby mother and how your relationship change when you became blind, like the one cool she didn't switch up on me when I got shot. She did, That's great? She still was? She still there to this today? Did you guys? Were you guys together when you got shot?

He was together? But that always changed it. Oh, so many girls come to the hospital. That's my boyfriend. I don't know if like girls like to make bitch of work reason or clean when they're getting jailed that they I don't know what they get out of this ship. But mad girls come this and just say you were cheating. You're putting this on women, not even that offbituaries or whatever. But they they were showing up to my hospital bit of night. Did you telling me it was girl that

was dubbing me a little bit? I'm in the hospital bad because people love people once they're down there, they love to attach themselves to you. So getting all attention from the family, I'm I woke up on a perk. My mother like, that's s such. I'm like, who that? She said, something'ing like, okay, it was a girl I was talking to one tag never met in my life. You don't know about bad bitch. I used to be on that like back in the day with like manday

and black planning. I was only a man. It was tagged. So my sister, I'm like, who that? She said, Oh, that's like ethnic from where she like she said a tag like I've never met her before. From now. I'm like, yo, tell my mother, yea. They got to take them to security because I don't know shot and people just coming up here random. You don't know that, you only ten, you don't know them. Don't let him in here. She

was like, I My sister like I got you. I'm like tied to you know, what's up my little sister, you know who Who's who dubbed it. She's like, I ain't cool with with your son, like you know. I mean, I'm sure that a lot of that made you angry, But like, what do you feel like you're better at as a dad now that you can't see? Mm hmmm, I feel like I ain't bad at nothing because I was doing the same thing when, Yeah, I could see just more like I'm more hands on with him now. Yeah,

like I spend more time with him now. Before I was running in the clubs, I was doing it all, coming in at night. Yeah. Now I could skip the club, chilling the house with my son. But you could skip the club because of COVID, sir, Now, definitely. But before when you were going to the club, I know your your your brother is here with you and you said

he's your eyes. But you're nineteen, right, so when you was going to the club, you couldn't take your brother like you mean, you go to you only like blond I need him to go. You ain't gonna drink nothing up now to the door. He'd be teed up in the club more than me when someone come to the dog, I see no, yeah, go through y'all good. I feel like you wouldn't let anybody in. Who's when somebody's lying? No, not even this is where the money come in. Like

that's money right there. You're not gonna stop money from coming into the club. That a man what you need? All right? I could go outside and get somebody and bring him and that's money. Yeah. The club only go like whatever he say goes. He paying this bill to night. There were buying the bottles like crazy when you first when I first got your shot, Yeah, I stayed out the club for a minute. Then I went to the club. Then it was like, yo, bro, come over, dance on

this one. Dance on this one. I say, Bro, I'm not a charity cage. Then it's like girls rubbing on your face and all that, like damn, Like I'm like, yeah, what are you telling these girls? Bro? We're in the club to strip it Like, yeah, you mind if I put my asking your face, I'm like, where the fund did this come from? He's gonna whispen mine now, I told you blind bro, that's sympathy. Hold it down. Stop. So I want to talk about something controversial in my opinion.

We were talking about dating apps and you were talking about how CJ helps you and I you said that there's been times where you don't tell them you're blind, Like, yeah, I don't why, Yeah, I don't know about that. No, it's like, get to know who I am before you found out when I'm blind. How long do you take normally when when online dating do you take? Well? How long do you take normally before you meet someone? Like? How long are you talking to them before you meet

them first? I well, on Facebook, it would be until we meet up with each other, until we're about to meet up, and I'm like, yo, let you know I'm blind. By then you don't have a conversation on the phone with me, you don't text, you don't said nasty ship. So it's no turning back now. If you turn them back, then I'm definitely gonna put you on blast. I'm a screenshot it and I'm gonna put that up on Facebook. You're gonna do what, screenshot what you said and put

that on Facebook. You're not about to not be doing that. You ain't gonna be screenshot I said, you're talking nasty, But the whole change your heart. I'm gonna put that on Facebook. This is what this is what she's about. She's not real m M. Okay, so what if they feel like you're not being real? Right? That's like okay, So I don't know if you uh, there was a there was a show on on Netflix, Love is Blind, ironically, and they were meeting they had never met, and there

was someone on there who was bisexual. Now this goes with with sexuality, but he was held this for I don't know the first couple of weeks that they were that they were dating, that they were getting so basically they talked through a wall, right, So the person because they want to know that you're meeting someone for their true self, So you talked through the wall. They're like talking for hours and hours and hours, days and days and falling in love like that, right, like on some

party line type ship. So with the guy who was bisexual, when he told the girl, she was really upset. He got mad at her basically was calling her like a homophobe and like that, and it was going, it's like we all see both sides of the ship, right, because she was like, damn, you could have told you could have told me, Like why is this something that you would hold for me, like she felt like, love me for who you know me as But but shouldn't that

be everything about you? Like I'm not gonna lie even when when I was dating the fact that I used to withhold this podcast, They're like, it's unfair because I feel like I'm telling you everything about me, but one of the biggest parts about me I'm not sharing with you. And you may have a problem with the fact that I talked about sucking dick online. I think it depends

how long. I mean, you know all of it. But but but but I think that that's how long you're talking to Yeah, but I say that to say no, because if I'm what, if I am talking to you day in and day out, I'm giving you this time, these hours and a part of you that you're just not sharing with me. You're withholding now to be very honest moving forward, I know you may feel like there's a change of heart, but now I also may not

know what more you're withholding. If you're a liar, if you're not like so, I think that there is a thing with telling people who you are, and that is a big part of you. You know what I mean, it's like maybe they're not comfortable turning right off the gate because it's I had situations where girl sitting on my lap, they're talking, Oh they see no about it. They drank it this down the third and when I get up, oh, he drunk, Like no, I can't see. Then it's like you went from bouncing on my lap

till you want to be my best friend. We're not doing that, shorty, because there it's like, don't have sympathy for me to your best friend not not being doing that. What do you think is the biggest challenge that you would want women to know that they don't have to worry about because you're blind. Do you feel like people should You don't gotta do not for me? I do it on my own. Yeah. So it's like if you think I'm I'm looking for you for a hand thought,

it's definitely not. I'm looking for you for support. I got enough of that. I get in cabbage by myself. I cook my own food and I washed my own clothes, A dressed myself. Girl, Like you need help washing up for what? I still not a wash up? Like with that? Yeah, Like if now, if you want to get in the shower with me. Then that's a different story. But we're not doing that. Now. What's like, yeah, do you so

you go on dates? What's the thing? What's etiquette? And I think this is really good for a lot of people to know. So, I mean, granted we never had somebody blind on or anything like that, but it is semi etiquette to being able to ask questions, I think and not be rude. How does that work for you? Like? What questions are rude to you? That women asking nothing?

Ask any question? Where I didn't haggers saying tell me they the shout commercial when they smelt the pond or he jumped about the coma she told me how pussy like that said it is, you gotta work for it? Cool? We laugh. I'm like, I got a good sister, Yeah, so littally ship. I got friends that be like, yo, bro, I know you can't see, but come on, you reach it too far if you don't ben nicky. He like, yo, bro, So I thought you were trying to grab my dick. Bro.

And I'm like what you all laugh like good? Since you My mother jumped on me when she seen me, it's no difference. My son hit me and run like, yeah, so I love is nothing different when um you're communicating at the app. So your brother helps you through that? Like how long did it take you to feel comfortable? Because I feel like you got to really let yourself go to be that vulnerable. People know that I was blind. No, just dating. You didn't have him talk through you. Oh

it was dead. It comfortable And I looked at it like when I came home, is like I was still trying to be who I was before I got shot, before I went blind. Yeah, so I'm still trying to live that lifestyle. So it was not it was like how she looked she bro hit up. You tell her that. Tell her that he was young at the time, so he was on something. You're sitting all heart, Bro, I'm not doing that. That is he like. Now I'm telling you, Bro, you're sending this. It's gonna work. Now, it's gonna work

for y'all little kids. Me. Bro, I'm gonna ask you. I know you're not on the mic so people may not hear you, but have you ever lied when he or he wanted to say something really mean, he was like, not you trip and I can't see this up. No, it's coming from my page, but I don't I don't say that. I don't say nothing being though, Yeah, if you can see, he would have been I don't bite my tongue for nobody. And so I'm gonna tell you how I fail. Do you like it or not? Let's

get back back into the sex. What's the best text? What's the best thing sexually that's happened to you since you've been blind? Like, do you think sex got a little bit better? It's more feel into it, like you concentrate more on it. Okay, so it's like you could really you could really feel everything from the throat, from everything. You can see everything before it's like you focusing when you can see so much everything. It's so crazy to me because there is so much visual simulation in sex

with me. Was it like that for you before and you had to readjust the way that you even felt pleasure or got turned on? Yeah? Before he was like you hit it from the back, you see the as more jiggle. You feel like that's the best thing. But then now that you can't see it and you actually just you're going off a feeling. You feel the tightness, you feel every you can feel when she's coming you

can feel everything. Bro, I feel like I would not be a blind n eggs dream like I feel like I'm really cute, but like, if it don't clap, what am I gonna do? I thought I thought it was like that too, but it's definitely not because you appreciate it more. Yeah, so you appreciate a little booties more now for anybody knows there, anybody knows skinny girls was never like my forte but now I don't discriminate they.

I don't discriminate. But you know what though, I could see like even if you was into skinny chicks before, how it'd be like nothing? Like I need a little more too, baby right, I love my big girls, But now I don't discriminate at all. Now, So for for yourself, like, um, do you how do you see your life? Do you want more kids? Like? Do you want marriage? Do you like being single? What do you? What do you want for yourself? More kids? I want one more. I don't

want my son to be by itself. Yeah, marriage, I gotta really trust you for that, really really trust you for that. You're like, it's not replacing CJ, but you the next best thing to see J. Yeah, so I really had to trust you for that. Do you ever feel I feel like we're getting real doctor feeling deep here, But it's cool. I'm not. I'm actually really curious because, um, when I met you guys, your brother was here, and

you'll seem to have such a good relationship. Do you ever feel guilty if like c J, how's a girlfriend? And he gets busier? Like, how does that mean you at all? Because it's always somebody else? They got, anybody know my passwords? Anybody know my sign? Comes through your tie to check this and it's no problem. That's good. My cousin in the crib ship down to my son. Don't see they said, I mean send this for me. So your ten year old son helps you? What kind

of stuff? Does he help you with? Everything? Anything but poe. I ain't exposing that, even though I was exposed like when I was seven to it. Wait, wait, anything but porn. You're saying c J types in the porn. We'll see that, nah series sexual theory. All right, Before we get out of here, we're gonna do our whole mail, and I want you to help us through it. For this person's question, isn't a question or no? Yes? Uh? No? I think it's Oh no, I think it's just a whole whole confession. Okay.

So um, and it is deep. So I do want to give a a trigger warning because specifically to the title says I was in Nile about being assaulted. I confronted him today. Um, if you guys are interested in sending us a homemail, go on over and send it to Horrible Decisions at gmail dot com. Uh, you may hear your email here on the podcast. Also, just know, all of our emails that we read are anonymous, so a lot of you guys do say please keep anonymous. We will never share your name. Uh. So here we go. Uh,

what does t W mean? By the way starts with t W. I don't know what t W means. I feel like I really am old. I don't be knowing what the little kids, what t W semicolon t W is how it starts. I don't know either. Okay to y'all, too horrible, horrible? Maybe okay, damn, Okay. Today I confronted someone who sexually assaulted me. I've been sexually assaulted before, but this time I stood up for myself. I feel so proud of myself and honestly credit this show for

empowering me to do so. I met up with a couple who had done a photo shoot for me and wanted to shoot again. I knew they liked to have thirds, and they were also well aware of my Polly lifestyle and the fact that I'm an online sex worker. The second time I went to see them, I arrived late, so we decided not to shoot and just hang out. We listened to music, smoked, and drank, and I was honestly having an amazing time. His girlfriend eventually came onto

me and we started kissing. He then joined in. At that point, I made it clear I was on my cycle and didn't want to have sex. Plus, regardless of that, I wasn't interested in any penetration. I am simply not sleeping with men right now. But I was down to watch and mess around. After we started all making out and touching, he crossed several boundaries and pinning me down

multiple times. I remember looking over at redacted multiple times, wondering if she thought he was aggressive too, but she just watched like she was content with the way things were going. He wanted my pants off, but I told him I'm on my period, and he said it was okay, because he wouldn't penetrate me. He was on top of me, grinding on me like he had been when he pulled my underweard to the side and penetrated me. I gasped

and just pushed away. It hurts so much, and I put my clothes on and told them I was tired because I was drunk and high, and I soon just fell asleep in his arms. Truth is, I thought it was small, something I shouldn't make a big deal of. I was interested in them, after all, and maybe it was an accident. I left after I woke up from

my nap and acted like everything was okay. The next day, I was sore and sad, and I tried to engage in sex with another partner a few days later and found myself crying and uncomfortable because all I could think about was this man shoving himself inside of me. I didn't want to believe that this small thing could hurt me so much, but it did. So today, after a

couple of weeks, I unblocked him and confronted him. She sent what he said, Um, I'm not going to read that part because I think that's a little too personal, but she did say love you guys, thank you for listening. Um and she pretty much wrote him. His response was, I sincerely apologized. I appreciate you telling me this. I will definitely take that into consideration, and in no way disagreeing with you. I hope you enjoy response. I like

that he said, no way disagreeing with you. But I think you know, men sometimes are ice cold when they don't realize well, the fact that this has on, like the fact that she couldn't even get through another act with another partner because she cried, like, there's trauma in this, and I do think a lot of men do just oh my bad. I know you you should have told me, like there's still almost blamed there that a lot of men have in response to that. It's sucked up that, uh,

you know it happens to you. We're obviously all sor I'd hear it. But I'm really glad that you shared that you realized it after, because a lot of people say to women like, well, why do you ain't say nothing when it would happened? Well, why if you didn't like it, you wouldn't stop? And I think a lot of people don't really know what's going on. I mean I could even say that for myself. It's it's a weird,

fucked up thing to say. But I mean, see, know, I don't know if you've ever had a moment where you were, like, um doing this, I don't really want to, but like here I am. It sucks because, like I don't know what makes us not say no? Is it disappointing the first other person? Is it because we've already gone too far and it's like I've wasted their time?

I think I think a lot of the problem is, especially with women, and I talked about this recently to UM, just been talking about what's been going on with the Tia and tiny allegations. I think that we need to

normalize um removing ourselves from uncomfortable spaces. So there's this constant dialogue with consent right now and saying no. But as women, for whatever reason, we do a lot of times put our comfortability levels behind because we are pleasers and we do understand what it means to uh almost

stroke the ego of our partners. And I think that we even talked about that a couple of weeks ago with Tiana, where uh, you know, you just you have to be empowered by also not caring about the other person if they make you feel uncomfortable, if they don't you know, if they do something you don't like being able to vocalize that. We talked about that with bad sex, someone's not doing something that's enjoyable for you. You have to take take away how it's gonna make them feel,

because it's not making you feel good. Because nobody at the end of the day, I feel like, wants to know after hours of sucking you that you hated it, or that you hurt them or not hours sorry, I men hours later, because normally we'll text you in the morning and it's like, damn, I wish I could have fixed it then, right. Yeah. I also think it's very important. One of my one of my bits of advices to that too, is to have these conversations out of the bedroom.

Um So, have it at dinner, have it in the living room, have it when you're not having fun, and just you know, just bring it up, because these types of conversations can become tense and uncomfortable, especially if you're laying in the bed with somebody. Uh, So, normalize talking about sex out of the bedroom. I think that's kind

of what we do. And I think there is an uncomfortable level to it, but I think that it makes it that much easier to tell your partner when something didn't feel good, or you were uncomfortable, or you weren't right.

Even in this the screenshot was a d M TAM and even that is unfortunate that this level of trauma you just experience you had to share and relive and explain to this man via an Instagram DM, Like, yeah, I I appreciate you for right and men and I want everybody elso to you know, check out some check out some things online. I know it sounds weird, not like a quiz, but like, if you're not really sure what's been happening with consent or someone you're sucking with,

look that ship up. Read a little bit about it, because I think there's a lot of blurred lines. And we've only been having our quote unquote consent conversation for the last few years, even though we've been going on for a long time. Like, and I hate when people are trivial about the ship, Like, Okay, so if I want to kiss somebody, I gotta ask him for consent. Dad da da da, Like look, sexual assault in kissing me two different things. Yeah, like this is you know

something that it might sunk hurt for a while. So, um, make sure you're letting your partners know, make sure that you're keeping in mind, keeping confident, and I know some people can't even say no because they're not in the safe space. But yeah, man, no, it's no. Even when we and like no, I stopped, you're looking at me like why you stopped and you said no? I watched enough flowing No, like I ain't. I think I ain't trying to go down for nothing. I'm well see it

on a lighter note. You got your pod coming out. People can check it out. Um, just tell us the name of it and some of the stuff that we can expect from your podcast. My podcast called Blind but Now See pretty much coming from a perspective of everybody been blind once upon in their life and it took them time to see the light. And you ain't got to be physically blind. You've been in I mean everybody

pretty much. I look at it like this. Every dark room got a light switch, but some people just scared to turn that light switch on to see the bread of how I break that room could really be? Yeah, really and ship. That's exactly in the sense of that like, that's exactly you know, he didn't cheating on you, did everything in front of you, but you just don't want to turn that light on and see it. Man, stop reading. It really is like what kind of guests can we

expect on your show? Uh? First, my first a couple episodes. My son gonna be on there, my mother gonna be on there pretty much. I'm explain my dark moments and how that light came to me. Then we're gonna talk from my mother point of view of being the one on the side of that bed, her dark moments beyond it. My son like the differences you face having a blind father. Me, I was more like ancern and more pressure because I'm like, damn,

my son got like it's farther different from everybody's. But it didn't matter to them though, Like I'm on he on live and he's like, oh, they were in a blind up. He just took the took it off. Me was like my father blind. The teacher like, no, you know your father now, I've seen your fam with plenty of time, and he's like, yes, he is he really blind? And she called me, she said, I May said you blind? I saw you. I'm blind, so you really blind? Him like, yeah,

she said, but you don't look like it. I'm like, how do a blind person look? What's the hat man person look like? We think, y'all, I don't know what we think. Stevie, wonder where your glasses at? I ain't glasses. What makes you not want to wear glasses? Ain't great? That's true. I was that is that a lot of people that that be haven't glassed on their eyes is great.

You know what's funny, it's more of ams. Someone has left a comment before this video has been over here, like yah, lookin Yeah, we're gonna read them to you. I'll leave you another voice on what I'm saying, and he's gonna be like, hey, Siris, like, you know, don't crise people. It's like there's a question. A lot of people just don't understand. I was one of those. I see something, Okay, blonde smiling, I'm like, what they're smiling for?

They don't know what's in front of them. Me, my my fob is stepping in, doodle die why stepping dude? Don't leave in my sneakers dead? Oh my goodness, that's your fear. That's my biggest that's my biggest fit. You get it. It must be a god. That's my biggest fit. And your biggest fear is stepping in dogs, stepping stepping in ships, relying, no dog, you don't wipe it off. You know your sneakers you're smelling. I'm leven, my speaker really smelling. Okay, that's what he's trying to tell you.

Stepping ship. I'm leaving that ship there. I'm leaving my sneakers there barefoot, well barefoot, just all right. I gotta get in the cab and getting the cab barefoot. It is what it is. I'm leaving them ships right there. We CJ Now he definitely douse. Tell your bro, don't please look at the floor. Even with my son he talking to me, Is I mad made sure being stepping in dood bro? Ye? No. One time he walking to the barbershop, he's like, yo, it's mad dude on his block.

So I woke back here taking a gap, bro, Yeah, oh and I gave one. I did give one. Damn. Okay, thank you for looking that up. So talking about too horrible, too wheezy bitch, like I ain't here this bitch. Trigger warning. Okay, okay, go cry. The acronyms be fucking me up. Words already sucked me up, but now I gotta figure out. Yo, see what the is this? Hen bro? This is this? I'm like, I'm like, damn, I'm old, like I don't want to stand. I saw me like all we had

to decipher was a slaver. You know, I want to do it for facts sake, episode on acronyms and one and the only reason what to do it is because I looked up the other day po box. You'll know what post office box? Yeah? Did you ain't noticed, y'all? Hortie, you heard me. I'm over your teacher heard some ship. I felt like it was post office pot with all that. No, that's too simple like something as long as it ain't science. Alight, y'all,

Thank you all for listening to another episode. As always, we're gonna leave you out with a five minute bonus clip for our patreeton. As you guys know, if you're all caught up on horrible decisions or you just want more horseship, there's over a hundred episodes over there, and we do drop three bonus episodes every month, so go on over to patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions. You do have to type it all in because it's marked is eighteen plus, so make sure you type it all in.

And again we're gonna leave you guys with a five minute bonus clip. Thank you guys for tuning into Yeah another episode of Horrible Decisions by hold on fruit roll ups on the tip of the dick while you suck it. Okay, First of all, bitch, whoa whoa whoa whoa? Like you know what I'd be thinking about sometimes when people come out with tips like this, like I feel like that side bitch type of tips, like you gotta do some wild out the box ship like you're showing out type ship.

Like if I get cheated on and I find out there was a fruit roll up on his stick, I'm gonna be like, I understand because I wasn't gonna do it. That is the most insane fucking ship. How old are you and where are you even buying fruit roll ups from Crystal? Can you please unmute your mic because I also have a question um to what comes next? So crossoto Crystal with a cave If you can unmut your

mic and share this roll off. See Crystal like, oh, so when we talk about a fruit roll up on dick, you don't want to have your video on that's what we do that okay? So, uh, you put the penis in the back or the microphone. It's a penis microphone. You have a penis microphone that is a green screen. Can you act like you understand production with your TV?

You have an asked real damn? So Crystal, here's my question because we do talk about pH and we had a guests who thought honey on the couci was okay, So I'm gonna ask you before that dick gets inserted into your vagina, do you wipe it off with a rag or do you really put fruit roll up dick in your pussy? She looked like she suck it off and have green dischard like all off? No, I really suck it all. I'll suck it all over, Crystal. What

are you Dominican? Puerto Rican? Puerto Rican? See, it's the what remember Penis came on talking about I used the honey pockets. It's always them, But I ain't doing all of that. Yeah, that's a lot. That is a whole lot, Nicole. What should be doing, They say, wife, girls give the best head. I'm mute yourself. Tell us your chest, Nicole? Can I also ask you if you've ever been offended if someone's called you Becky? Uh No, Karen's annoying. But Karen is annoying. I can understand that, can I? But

I've never been called to Karen? What about? Well, I'm not with that shirt? You better not. When when the song Becky came out? Did you take pride in that there's a song to Becky? Oh god, this is really not that you're really white? You're telling me? Are you joking right now? Nicole? How old you? That's why you're telling me you have never heard the Negro spiritual? Maybe I'm I'm playing you. Alexa, connect the phone. We hear it. You know you're sucking it up. Let me put it

on all right? Sorry, here we go, Aleta, volume tip both you let me know. She was like, we know from Florida, but calm the funk down. Oh wait, Rashida just said it's not an age thing. So is this a location shame? She's trying to tell us we're hood rats. But anyway, Nicole, do you have any no? Not u? Nicole Rashida. Oh my god, wait, can you also look at the whole chat. There's quite a few people who have never heard the Becky song. We'll put it in there.

We'll put it in the description of this episode. But Nicole, tell us, do you have because they do say white girls give the best blow jobs? Do you have a blowjob tip? Because we need to prove that this is a myth um. No, not really, she just sucks thick. White girls are just I just suck it like yeah, I just like use one hand and I stuck at the same time and use my time like never had any complaints. Well, good for you, thank you, thank you, Nicole.

Thanks We aren't getting these fruit roll ups out ship I notice, right, Well, I guess let's get into our hoary blade decision um. And as always for the town hall, we kind of like to recap, allow you guys to give us some feedback or your thoughts on the episodes that came out during the month of February. We don't kind of like to recap. Do you'll notice that Mandy does that? Everybody? Not? If you do, we're kind of gonna get into it. No, we are getting into it.

You finished are you're done. It would be kind of because the way you be interrupted, I don't know we're really gonna get through. What are not saying? You're the interrupter, bitch? Are you kidding? You know what? All right? I was worse. No no no no no no. We got interrupted, but I was dead as giving shout out and you start reading comments as if I'm not talking, like, look, I see the nods going on. You know what I mean? Fuck you. Sorry,