Dive into this thought-provoking episode as Stephen and Margaret delve into the most common suffering that many people encounter - low self-esteem. We explore the often overlooked consequence of self-doubt, the tendency to put others first to our own detriment, and how these feed into a cycle of disrespect – towards ourselves and from others. Their discussion shifts towards the complexity of relationships and how they can often become a battlefield of dominance, with the stronger personality fre...
Feb 12, 2024•33 min•Season 4Ep. 2
Often, we perceive Buddhists as solitary figures, lost in the realms of meditation and self-reflection. But is this the whole picture? Is Buddhism just about individual enlightenment, or does it also advocate service to others? The story of Buddhism begins with the Buddha, who walked a path of solitude, wisdom, and enlightenment. Yet, he initially hesitated to share his profound understanding of life and existence, fearing that it might be too complex for others to grasp. Nonetheless, he was per...
Feb 05, 2024•9 min•Season 4Ep. 1
Season 4 of the Death Dhamma podcast kicks off on Monday, February 5, 2024. It's time to take a look at the people in this world who help to alleviate the suffering of other beings. Maybe they help people, maybe they help animals, we want to know them. To learn how they do it, and how they spark their compassion. We also want to explore teachings, practices, and stories around freeing others from suffering. Why? Because each of us, in our way can help. We too, can bring relief to ourselves and o...
Jan 29, 2024•7 min•Season 4Ep. 1
One day, a member of the group I meditated with said to me, “You write and talk about when a friend or family member dies, but what about when we lose our pets?” She had recently lost a cat who had been by her side for nineteen years. This loss was deep and painful. I carried her question with me and contemplated how best to write about grieving our animal friends. Around the same time, another friend told me they thought it would be interesting if my next book was about the spiritual nature of ...
Jan 08, 2024•14 min•Season 3Ep. 41
In this heartwarming episode, we delve into an often overlooked aspect of legacy planning: emotional life insurance. We acknowledge the importance of financial life insurance and how it protects our loved ones in our absence. But our conversation takes a unique turn as we ponder on the importance of leaving an emotional cushion for our dear ones. Dr. Kimberly Harms, shares her compelling views on how our culture tends to shy away from such dialogues, and the impact of continuous conversations ca...
Dec 18, 2023•42 min•Season 3Ep. 40
In this thought-provoking episode, our guest Seth delves into the primary sources of inspiration for his latest book, The House We Live In: Virtue, Wisdom, and Pluralism . In the wake of the 2016 elections, he felt compelled to discuss the competencies, understandings, habits, and skills vital for the survival of democracy, as he perceived it to be under threat. Seth also draws from his previous work comparing Buddhist and Aristotelian views of the good life, extending this comparison to Confuci...
Nov 20, 2023•48 min•Season 3Ep. 39
Memento Mori- A healthy way to remember that we are going to die. That doesn’t make it easy. Join as Margaret Meloni and Francesca Arnoldy thoughtfully, joyfully, and peacefully discusses what it means to do the work. And how all of us can benefit from being prepared to face death. This is a special between-season episode of The Deatth Dhamma podcast. If you are willing to do the work, then the Death Doula’s Guide to Living Fully and Dying Prepared will by your gentle guide. With thoughtful exer...
Oct 30, 2023•37 min•Season 3Ep. 38
Welcome back to another episode of the Death Dhamma podcast! In our previous episode, we were deeply inspired by Whitney Sause's transformative journey and her insights into Buddhism, attachment, and personal growth. Whitney's story resonated with us as she shared her experiences of disconnecting from a challenging lifestyle and finding a new path. During her six-month retreat, Whitney embraced the practice of Buddhism and meditation, which became an integral part of her life. However, she also ...
Oct 09, 2023•11 min•Season 3Ep. 37
In this episode of the podcast, Margaret introduces Whitney Sause, a Buddhist practitioner who has used Buddhism to navigate through significant challenges in her life. Whitney shares her journey of how she integrated Buddhism and attachment to overcome anger management issues and other difficulties. Whitney explains that her journey with anger began before her time in the military, as she was raised in an abusive and chaotic environment that lacked emotional processing skills. Seeking a way to ...
Oct 02, 2023•34 min•Season 3Ep. 36
As we approach the end of season 3, Margaret finds herself reflecting on the lessons and challenges that come with planning a podcast. She realizes that there is an element of clinging involved in wanting to continue creating the podcast. However, she also acknowledges that if it is time to let go, then it is time to let go. One of the attachments she has is the belief that she must be the sole creator of podcast ideas. This mindset stems from her tendency to work independently, which often lead...
Sep 25, 2023•10 min•Season 3Ep. 35
Today we delve into the teachings of the Pali Canon and explore the wisdom imparted by our esteemed teachers. Today, let's reflect on the concepts of tanha and dukkha, as elucidated in these verses: "When this sticky, uncouth craving overtakes you in the world, your sorrows proliferate like wild grass after rain. However, if you are able to overcome this craving, which is hard to escape, your sorrows will roll off you like water beads off a lotus." (Dhp 335-336) “Just as a tree, even when cut, c...
Sep 18, 2023•17 min•Season 3Ep. 34
In this episode, we explore the topic of attachment and its role in our lives. Dr. Seth Zuiho Segal challenges the common belief that Buddhism advocates for non-attachment in all aspects of life. He explains that there are different kinds of attachments, including attachments to people, objects, opinions, and self-identity. While certain attachments can be limiting, Seth argues that relationships are crucial for our overall well-being and that they provide an opportunity to practice mindfulness ...
Sep 11, 2023•16 min•Season 3Ep. 33
In today's episode, we will be contemplating the rules and our responses to them, drawing examples from both professional and spiritual realms. In her professional life, Margaret teaches project management, guiding individuals in planning and implementing various initiatives. In an introductory course, participants often question the necessity of following all the recommended best practices. Margaret explains that while they are not obligated to do so, it is important to be aware of these tools ...
Sep 04, 2023•15 min•Season 3Ep. 32
Congratulations, after much work, you have reached the mountain top and are wise. Now, all you need to do is sit back, and relax. Enjoy the rest of your time in this life and revel in your wisdom. You know better! Wisdom is challenging to obtain, and requires work to maintain. In our last episode, we gained a shamanic perspective on the four challenges we face as we seek wisdom. Today, we will consider those challenges, and consider some Buddhist teachings on wisdom. Specifically on the Noble Ei...
Aug 28, 2023•15 min•Season 3Ep. 31
In this episode, Margaret reconnects with Mike Sanders, a shaman who shares his journey and experiences with Native American Indian practices. They discuss how different paths can lead to the same goal of finding peace and less suffering in life. Mike talks about his upbringing and how his Native American heritage influenced his decision to explore shamanism. He shares how he stumbled upon a book on shamanism that resonated with him and led him to practice Native American traditions. Mike also d...
Aug 21, 2023•37 min•Season 3Ep. 30
In this introspective episode, Margaret delves into the concept of rebirth and its impact on our lives. Initially, rebirth was just a distant belief for her, something she didn't ponder upon often. However, as she immersed herself in the teachings of Buddhism, rebirth started to become something more tangible, something she contemplated deeply. Through her interactions with various Buddhist groups and teachers, Margaret was exposed to intriguing ideas surrounding rebirth. The notion that we have...
Aug 14, 2023•9 min•Season 3Ep. 29
When it comes to relationships, those with a secure attachment style thrive on honesty, tolerance, and emotional closeness. They possess a beautiful balance of independence and connection, not fearing solitude yet still able to form strong bonds. However, it's important to note that people with other attachment styles can also find happiness in their relationships. It all boils down to understanding ourselves and how we connect with others. To distinguish this concept from Buddhist attachment, w...
Aug 07, 2023•11 min•Season 3Ep. 28
In this thought-provoking podcast episode, host Margaret Meloni interviews Bill Belanger, a contemplative psychotherapist and practicing Buddhist, as they delve into the concepts of suffering, attachment, and emptiness in Buddhism. Bill shares his background as a psychotherapist and his experiences living and practicing Buddhism in Asia, shedding light on the integration of meditation and therapeutic practices into the lives of entrepreneurs to improve their businesses.Bill's website is https://...
Jul 31, 2023•44 min•Season 3Ep. 27
Welcome back to the Death Dhamma podcast. Today's episode is a reflective one, and we hope you will find it useful on your own personal journey. In our previous episode, titled "The Kosala Sutta AN 5.49," we explored the various methods and approaches to funerals for Buddhists. We questioned the purpose of these rituals for someone who has already departed, realizing that they often serve as a means to support the grieving process of the living. While these rituals may not directly benefit the d...
Jul 24, 2023•7 min•Season 3Ep. 26
In this episode, we explore the different death and mourning rituals of Theravada, Mahayana, and Tibetan Buddhists. These rituals vary in location, customs, and beliefs, but they all serve as a reminder of impermanence and the shared experience of grief. For those who share the beliefs discussed, these rituals hold significance in assisting the deceased's transfer to rebirth and increasing positive karma. However, some may question the necessity of performing these rituals for someone who is gon...
Jul 17, 2023•18 min•Season 3Ep. 25
On this episode of the Death Dhamma podcast, Margaret interviews grief expert Tracee Dunblazer to explore how grief can be a spiritual process. Tracee is the author of Transformative Grief: an Ancient Ritual for Modern Times and has extensive experience in working with grief and karmic relationships. Tracee explains that grief is a daily process that we experience for various reasons, not just due to death or loss. She believes that grief is an awakening in our mental, emotional, and physical wo...
Jul 10, 2023•46 min•Season 3Ep. 24
Welcome to this thought-provoking and insightful episode of the Death Dhamma podcast. In this episode, Margaret takes us on a journey to explore the theme of life review. Drawing inspiration from three different stories, Heaven Can Wait, Defending Your Life, and The Good Place, she delves into the idea of redemption and the human fascination with what happens after we depart from this world. While most of us may not have near-death experiences, Margaret suggests that we can use our Buddhist prac...
Jul 03, 2023•13 min•Season 3Ep. 23
In this episode, we delve into the significance of meditation practices that are specifically designed to aid us in preparing for the inevitable event of death. By partaking in these practices, we can gain valuable insight into the process of dying and death itself, ultimately enabling us to face this transformation with a sense of inner calm and peace. Moreover, not only does this preparation benefit our own journey toward the end, but it also equips us with the tools to support others in their...
Jun 26, 2023•13 min•Season 3Ep. 22
Special guest Eric Bennett, host of the Round Trip Death Podcas t, shares how his interest in near-death experiences led him to start his podcast. Rather than sensationalizing these stories, Eric gives people a safe space to discuss what happened, providing listeners with insight into the sacredness of these experiences and the difficulty of putting them into words. In his time on the Death Dhamma podcast, Eric ties together the common themes that he has noted in his many discussions. Some peopl...
Jun 19, 2023•29 min•Season 3Ep. 21
How do I know if I am being greedy? How do any of us know? Would you call yourself a greedy person? Probably not. But my friends, there might be times when we get caught up in the kind of greed that leads to unskillful attachment. How do we know? What do we do? A discussion on greed and how it can lead to unskillful attachment and suffering. Instead of avoiding enjoyment or appreciation of external objects or experiences, one should approach them with a sense of equanimity and mindfulness, recog...
Jun 12, 2023•15 min•Season 3Ep. 20
In this episode of the Death Dhamma podcast, the theme of attachment is explored in the context of how it brings us suffering. The episode begins by discussing the concept of craving and how it leads to clinging, which is the root of suffering. The three fires or poisons of greed, hatred, and confusion are discussed as the sources of our need for clinging and aversion. The teachings emphasize the importance of extinguishing these fires and avoiding these poisons to achieve liberation. The episod...
Jun 05, 2023•14 min•Season 3Ep. 19
Margaret Meloni has a conversation with Dave Smith of Dave Smith Dharma ( davesmithdharma.com ) about the common misunderstanding that attachment is the same as non-attachment or detachment when it is actually closer to the Pali word "loba", which translates to "greed". Dave explains how greed is unethical and unskillful and can lead to sacrificing one's own values and morals to acquire something, leading to suffering. The conversation also touches on the "three fires" of greed, hatred, and conf...
May 29, 2023•44 min•Season 3Ep. 18
Margaret reflects on the fear of death and the challenges that may arise during the dying process. She shares her personal experience of losing loved ones and the resilience gained from Buddha's teachings and her Buddhist practice. Once again we are reminded of the concept of letting go and accepting death as a gift, emphasizing the importance of preparing for death at both the spiritual and mundane level. Margaret contemplates her own fears around dying, including concerns for the well-being of...
May 22, 2023•15 min•Season 3Ep. 17
In this episode, Margaret delves into the concept of leaving things unfinished. We all do it, whether it's a to-do list or a long-term goal that we never quite achieved. But what about the ultimate unfinished task: death? We can find peace in the face of our own mortality by letting go of our attachments and being ready to leave at any time. Margaret shares a touching story of a family friend who found closure before passing away. His wife realized he was having a hard time letting go of life, s...
May 15, 2023•16 min•Season 3Ep. 16
In this episode, Margaret interviews Olivia Bareham, founder of Sacred Crossings in Southern California, who helps individuals through the dying journey. Olivia has been supporting people through the dying journey for the last 20 years and for the last 15, she has been teaching conscious dying and death doula and death midwifery work. Olivia created Sacred Crossings Funeral Home ( Sacredcrossings.com ), which offers alternative funeral services such as home funerals, green burials, and full-body...
May 08, 2023•31 min•Season 3Ep. 15
