Death Dhamma Podcast

Open and honest discussions with wise and skillful teachers about their experiences with life, death, and Buddhism. If you wonder how others on the path have dealt with death and dying and grief, be sure to listen in. Everyone has a story, a perspective, and a valuable lesson to share. Embrace death, live a full life, and learn to love impermanence because nobody gets out of this alive.

Last refreshed: July 9th, 2025 at 8:39 PM ⓘ

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Episodes

Journaling and Thinking About the Intersection of Hope, Realism, and Attachment

In this episode of the podcast, Margaret reflects on the concept of hope and clinging in situations where someone is sick, injured, or dying. She shares a personal anecdote of a friend's children contracting chicken pox and the introduction of a vaccine as an example of hope versus realism. Margaret then raises questions about the line between hope and clinging in scenarios where someone strives for healing beyond what is expected or accepted. Margaret also shares a personal experience of her fa...

May 01, 2023•14 min•Season 3Ep. 14

Embracing Non-Attachment: Why Taking Action and Making Plans Matter

While some may believe that Buddhism is devoid of planning, it is a path toward a specific goal: the end of suffering. The Buddha actively decided to teach the cessation of suffering and shared a whole system of the Four Noble Truths and the Noble Eightfold Path. However, he was not attached to the outcome of his teachings. He taught because some would understand and not convert a certain number of people. As practitioners, we also follow a path and seek to become free from suffering. We may pla...

Apr 24, 2023•13 min•Season 3Ep. 13

Cayce Howe: Insights into Attachment and Compassion Fatigue

In this episode of the Death Dhamma podcast, host Margaret Meloni, interviews Cayce Howe, a Dharma teacher and co-founder of Sustainable Caring. They discuss the topic of attachment, which is a key component of Buddhism and can lead to suffering if not managed properly. Cayce explains that the energy of compassion is endless, but when we become attached to a specific outcome, we may experience what is commonly known as compassion fatigue. However, Cayce argues that this fatigue is not caused by ...

Apr 17, 2023•44 min•Season 3Ep. 12

Letting Go of Constructed Selves: From Margaret’s Attachment Journal

In this episode of the Death Dhamma podcast, Margaret Meloni explores the concept of attachment, clinging, and aversion. She asks listeners to consider how they define themselves and whether they will let go of certain constructed versions of themselves. She shares two personal experiences of letting go of past versions of herself, including one where she clung to her identity as a computer programmer when teaching project management. She was reminded by a student that what mattered was whether ...

Apr 10, 2023•18 min•Season 3Ep. 11

Exploring the Relationship Between Self and Suffering

You can find lots of discussions in terms of self-versus no self and what the Buddha really taught and what the Buddha really meant. I am staying away from going into an in-depth discussion of these various interpretations. To share context, I speak to you as a Theravada Buddhist. And I draw on the teachings from the Pali Canon. I come from a place of working with teachings of these things are not self. As in the answer to this question: “And is it proper to regard what is inconstant, stressful,...

Apr 03, 2023•12 min•Season 3Ep. 10

Mary Stancavage: A Story of Letting Go

If you and I look at what makes us uncomfortable, that discomfort will show us where attachment lives. It could be things or ideas. Today with the help of Mary Stancavage we look at the should of self. As in I should be like this or that. Or if I am this way or that way, then people will like me. We cling to ideas of self, we cling to relationships because they are our identity. Because we are afraid of the alternative. Who am I if I am not this carefully constructed self that I have created and...

Mar 27, 2023•31 min•Season 3Ep. 9

Learning to Embrace Discomfort: On Journaling Aversion

I looked around the room, and there I saw him. Someone I had once worked with, a person who I felt had been purposefully difficult and disrespectful. I found myself thinking, “Ugh, why is he here?” And my immediate thoughts were not friendly or positive. Now, I understand, this was me experiencing aversion. Specifically, because aversion involves pushing something away. And that act of pushing something away is not really gently setting something aside. It is more aggressive. Fair enough, I know...

Mar 20, 2023•15 min•Season 3Ep. 8

Why Anger and Aversion Might Not Be So Different: Insights from Buddhist Teachings

With attachment, we are only trying to get things that we want. And once we have those things, we don’t want them to go away. When we experience aversion, we push away (usually aggressively) the things that we dislike. Aversion refers to feelings of aggression, anger, and hatred. Let’s spend more time considering aversion as angry and aggressive. The Second Noble Truth states that there is an origin of suffering and that the origin of suffering is attachment to the three kinds of desire: desire ...

Mar 13, 2023•15 min•Season 3Ep. 7

Venerable Dr. De Hong: Childhood Trauma and Aversion to Self

When your own parents do not offer you love and support, how do you come to a place of self-acceptance? If you go to school, bloody from being beaten, isn't reasonable to expect someone/anyone to ask if you are OK? And when they do not, you might just begin to wonder if there is something wrong with you. And aversion towards yourself takes root. Venerable De Hong knows about trauma. He left Vietnam on a boat. Overcrowded with others escaping a harsh regime, they sat in place for many days – with...

Mar 06, 2023•44 min•Season 3Ep. 6

Journaling to Uncover Craving and Clinging in Everyday Life

What is the difference between craving and clinging? Craving is wanting. I want something. Looking back on the past few days, here are some of the things I have craved: Coffee, chocolate and other specific foods, solitude, time with friends, - yes, I crave both alone time and time with some of my special people, and when that gets out of balance, so do I. That in itself is probably worthy of future exploration. The reality is that this idea of balance that I have created for myself is not always...

Feb 27, 2023•14 min•Season 3Ep. 5

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