I've received a lot of feedback from people that see their family dynamic deteriorate after some type of loss. I am fortunate in that in times of need my family rally and around each other and be become stronger because of it. I wish everyone could be so fortunate! Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click here to subscribe via Stitcher Click here to listen via iHeart Radio Contact me using any of following: email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com twitter - http://ww...
Jun 21, 2017•21 min
As Father's Day approaches, I am confronted with the fact that I am forced to deal with the fact that I have to live without my loved ones... as opposed to grieving their loss. For this I used to sometimes get jealous. Does this make me selfish? Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click here to subscribe via Stitcher Click here to listen via iHeart Radio Contact me using any of following: email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwi...
Jun 14, 2017•22 min
A few weeks ago, I aske d you to tell me what books you were reading and the music that you liked that helped you with your grief... and here are your responses! Books The Bereaved Parent by Harriet Sarnoff Schiff A Grief Observed by CS Lewis The Long Goodbye: A Memoir by by Meghan O'Rourke Blue Nights by Joan Didion Stitches: A Handbook on Meaning, Hope and Repair By Anne Lamott The Orphaned Adult: Understanding And Coping With Grief And Change After The Death Of Our Parents by Alexander Levy O...
Jun 07, 2017•13 min
I am deathly afraid of heights. However, I needed to confront my fear while attending the Air Assault School at Ft. Campbell, KY. During this course, you are required to complete not one but two "high" obstacles. I completed one, but was injured on the second. I needed to convince myself that I could do something outside of my comfort zone. As a byproduct, I've learned that just because I've done something once doesn't me it'll be any easier the second time. but I can confront the anguish and an...
May 31, 2017•27 min
I hate paying bills... It's a repetitive process that is a necessary evil in life. If we fail deal with our monthly obligations, we suffer dire consequences and life becomes stressful. Grief is a bill that we pay as a price for losing a loved one. We must deal with it as it comes... if we put it off, the pain and stress of not facing it could overwelm us. Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click here to subscribe via Stitcher Click here to listen via iHeart Radio ...
May 24, 2017•16 min
In this episode of the Dougy Podcast, I had an opportunity to discuss how and why I decided to start a podcast about my grief, my relationship with my father and we talk about what I've learned about myself, if anything, since starting the podcast. Enjoy!
May 18, 2017
This episode is dedicated to Marsha Cooke in the memory of Darwyn Cooke. As I record this episode, it is the 1 year anniversary of Darwyn Cooke's death. for those who may not know, Darwyn was a Canadian comic book writer, artist, cartoonist, and animator. He drew covers for the Batman comic franchise, including working on a project that my son loved, Batman beyond in which Bruce Wayne turns the responsibility of being Batman to a teenage boy. One of the reasons I like Batman is because our stori...
May 17, 2017•23 min
Is there really a "boys don't cry culture?" I never saw my father cry, and when he died, I didn't see any other me display a lot of emotion either. But at the same time, no one told me I SHOULDN'T cry. I think it may come down to two things: 1. Men and women are just wired differently. I watched an episode of "Brain Games" - http://channel.nationalgeographic.com/brain-games/episodes/battle-of-the-sexes/ 2. Some men are able to get in touch with there so called "feminine side" Why does it appear ...
May 10, 2017•25 min
I completely lost it last week as I remembered the anniversary of my father's death. That got me to thinking about the story of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson. and how I have many different emotional states that I sometimes can't manage to control. NOTE - I just realized that I mention "her" in the podcast... That would be my mother. Sorry, Mom!! Also let me know if there are any songs/books that help you read/listen to and how the help you in your grief recovery process. Than...
May 03, 2017•18 min
I recorded this episode on Monday as I always do, and was also attempting to release this episode early. I normally release episodes on Wednesday. After recording his episode, however, I was so overcome with emotion that I wasn't able to edit it until today. Monday was the 39th anniversary of my father's death. Since he also died on a Monday - April 24, 1978 and this episode was recorded on Monday, April 24, 2017 today was just much more emotional for me than I thought it would be. R.I.P. Dad - ...
Apr 26, 2017•15 min
As the 39th anniversary of my father's death approaches, I have been thinking about a conversation I had with my mother. She says that she asked me at age 11 or 12 if I wanted to see a therapist and I told her that I didn't. I have no recollection of this conversation, but I explore the possibilities in this episode. After doing a little research on what therapists do (and don't do), I don't know how well I would have received therapy. Please share this episode with a therapist if you know any.....
Apr 19, 2017•25 min
Ive had the opportunity to talk to a few people over the last few weeks about the loss of a parent. In this episode I reflect on the 5 stages of grief as if the were applied in a cookbook written by my recipe. If you are not familiar with the 5 stages of grief, they are: Denial Anger Barganing Depression Acceptance These stages were develoed by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross . You can get more information about them here: http://grief.com/the-five-stages-of-grief/ Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click...
Apr 12, 2017•20 min
I recently look at some scars that I had fir a while and realized that just like grief, some wounds heal completely, some leave scqars and some scabs are ripped from wounds long before they heal... causing the healing process to start anew. Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click here to subscribe via Stitcher Click here to listen via iHeart Radio Contact me using any of following: email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgri...
Apr 05, 2017•19 min
This week's episode is inspired by Natalie, a listener recently lost her mother and wanted to know kspecifically when I knew my live had been changed forever by the death of my father. Simply put, I needed to open my heart the love others. The only way for me to do that, was to become vulnerable. Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click here to subscribe via Stitcher Click here to listen via iHeart Radio Contact me using any of following: email - darwyn@dealingwit...
Mar 29, 2017•20 min
I have realized over the years that I have been judging how I thought people should react in certain situations based on my own personal grief experience. Once I realized I was so wrong, it allowed me to see people and the circumstances in a totally different light. Suzan Lori-Parks is an American playwright, novelist and screenwriter. To learn more about her and her work visit her website: http://www.suzanloriparks.com/ Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click he...
Mar 22, 2017•21 min
I don't understand why we don't talk about our grief more. In full transparency, I don't actively discuss it outside of this podcast... and I don't even mention the fact that I have a podcast about grief to many folks. Well this has changed for me. I have openly discussed my grief journey and the circumstances of my father's passing with a complete stranger, and it was a wonderful experience. Grief is a suject that we can't keep bottled up, we must discuss it like anything else we bring up in co...
Mar 15, 2017•19 min
My writing comes not from the happy moments, but from struggle and grief. - Isabel Allende This podcast is the direct result of losing my father at an early age. It has served as a form of therapy for me and each week I feel better as I release a lot of emotions that I've kept bottled up for so long. One of the things that I have realized is that in order for me to truly appreciate where I am now in my grief recovery process, I must look back at where I started. To learn more about Isabel Allend...
Mar 08, 2017•19 min
So it finally happened... I conducted my FIRST EVER interview. I had the opportunity to spend some times chatting with Joshua Black of the Grief Dreams podcast. Joshua is also working on his PhD in Psychology at Brock University in Ontario, Canada. The main reason behind talking to Joshua was to get the sotry behind his grief and how he dealt with it and how others may has supported him through his grief recovery process. We did finally discuss his research as it relates to dreams that some peop...
Mar 01, 2017•1 hr 1 min
A lot has happened this week! I have been interviewed by the team of Grief Dreams Podcast ( https://griefdreamspodcast.podbean.com/e/episode-18-grief-dreams-podcast/) . I had a great time discussing my grief recovery process with Joshua Black and Shawn Ram. After delaying my announcement about new things coming to the podcast, I decided to tell the world that I'm interviewing people on this show... next week I'll share my interview / conversation with Joshua Black. We'll be talking about this gr...
Feb 22, 2017•17 min
The loss of loved ones affect my greatly. Why do some people seem not to grieve when the lose someone close to them. I've always wondered about this phenomenon. If you have a way of easily coping with the loss of a loved one, please share how you do it. Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click here to subscribe via Stitcher Click here to listen via iHeart Radio Contact me using any of following: email - darwyn@dealingwithmygrief.com twitter - http://www.twitter.co...
Feb 15, 2017•17 min
There was no episode February 1st... I was sick as I don't know what and didn't even have the energy to push the record button. With that said, I've spent the last week contemplating how my recent bout with the common cold, or flu has caused me to reflect on my grief recovery process. Sometimes I don't think I give myself enough time to recover and I suffer longer than necessary. Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click here to subscribe via Stitcher Click here to...
Feb 08, 2017•16 min
The life my grandfather lived is vastly different than mine. He was born and raised in a Jim Crow segregated United States. I have vee afforded more opportunities than he has had give the passage of laws the were spearheaded by the spearheaded by Civil Rights movement. The election/inauguration of Donald Trump as President in th U.S. caused some to belief that he and more importantly his supporters want to not only role back recent legislation passed during the Obama administration, but also go ...
Jan 25, 2017•22 min
WOW... It's been a year since I launched the podcast. I didn't know what I would talk about from week to week. I only knew that I had a lot of emotions that were bottled up inside and that I needed a release, and podcasting was my platform of choice. I am grateful to everyone who has listened to any episode of this show and even more so to those that have listened to every episode. For me the thing that I have learned is that grief imitates life... or is that the other way around. Thanks for tak...
Jan 18, 2017•28 min
After much deliberation, I've created a Facebook group - Click here to join. I want the group to be a place where we can openly share what;s on our minds and how we feel/cope with our loss and the emotions surrounding them. Speaking of social media, this week I discuss how I found out about my aunt's passing. Normally, I would receive a phone call, typically from my mother. That didn't happen this time! I found out from a post on Facebook, about an hour after her passing. Click here to subscribe...
Jan 11, 2017•15 min
Happy New year Many are making resolutions - usually something to change their life in a positive manner - to stop smoking or drinking, to diet, or to get out to the gym. Sometimes these resolutions fail because we choose to do something else with our time, or because of a lack of willpower. I made a resolution a long time ago not to let my father's death control my life, When I it a tough patch in life, I think about positive traits my dad possessed and try to figure out how I can appy those to...
Jan 04, 2017•18 min
As I think about how people plan to prioritize their time for the new year in the form of resolutions, I'm reminded by a listener that we can not do with time is heal our wounds caused by grief. Healing from physical pain involves getting scabs that protect our wounds until the healing process is complete. Unfortunately when grieving, those scabs are reopened by our grief triggers, or things that people say or do... so the healing process is never really complete. I also now question whether the...
Dec 28, 2016•24 min
Congrats to Sofia, Don and Paul - the winners of my contest giveaway. I'll be requesting your contact info shortly to send your gift cards. I've been dealing with some personal issues lately that have kept me pretty preoccupied over the last couple of weeks. I've been so wrapped up and taken aback emotionally that I scrapped my original idea for this week just to get the past week off of my chest. I struggle to find the answer to the question of why... Why do bad things happen to good people. Ha...
Dec 21, 2016•11 min
Even though the holidays can be stressful enough on their own, adding the stress of grief can sometimes make it unbearable. There are a few approaches to dealing with the holidays while grieving Spend the holidays alone. Maybe dealing with the loss during the holidays is too painful. Incorporate your loved on in your holiday. Make their favorite food or do their activity. Start a new tradition if incorporating old traditions are to painful. Whatever you do, communicate with people just to let kn...
Dec 14, 2016•22 min
I've been reminded by watching a co-worker recover from a cold that we don't always look the way that we feel. While she appears to be well, you can hear the fact that she is still recovering in her voice which hasn't fully recovered. I feel the same way when it comes to grief - I look fine, but sometimes that masks the way I truly feel. Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS Click here to subscribe via Stitcher Click here to listen via iHeart Radio Contact me using a...
Dec 07, 2016•19 min
I have been going through a lot during the holiday season... Major eye surgery, from which I am on the road to recovery. I had a family member who was involved in a bus accident in Chattanooga, TN. They are also on the road to recovery I had a member of my Army family lose his teenage son in a freak accident. I have rationalized why my father was taken from me as a means of making it easier to cope with his death. I can not, however, imagine having to bury my child. I don't think I could ever fi...
Nov 30, 2016•18 min
