The end of a long-term relationship often leaves people adrift in the aftermath, entangled in the complexities of their past, and unsure how to reclaim their lives. In this episode, Jason and Lauren dive headfirst into this poignant topic, tackling the reality of life post-divorce and the path towards recovery. The art of thriving after such a devastating experience is not an innate one; sometimes people need a helping hand to guide them through this challenging journey. The Vallotton's discuss ...
Aug 23, 2023•36 min
In this episode, Jason and Lauren answer several questions sent in by the audience! The topics covered are: Masturbation habits vs. porn habits and the impact on relationships Roles and responsibilities in marriage Soul ties Trying to save a marriage Navigating heartbreak/rejection Sex in marriage Patreon If you've enjoyed this podcast, would you consider financially supporting the show? Every donation, big and small, helps the Vallottons continue to prioritize making this content for you. Click...
Aug 16, 2023•43 min
With three adult kids and a couple of toddlers, the Vallottons are on round two of parenting and are handing out some of their best “hindsight” advice! Jason and Lauren begin by stating, "don't NOT do the hard work," which is easy to forgo when you’re tired! Your kids need to believe you, they need structure, and they will thrive most when you and your spouse put in the hard work to get on the same page. All of these things take work, but it's that is WORTH the effort in the long game. Team work...
Aug 09, 2023•45 min
What if the journey to parenthood wasn't the romantic, fairy-tale route everyone paints, but instead, a maze of medical interventions, emotional turmoil, and gut-wrenching decisions? Join us as we unmask our deeply personal struggle with infertility, from a vasectomy at 24 to years of unsuccessful attempts at conceiving. We bare the heartache, the hope, and the biology behind the trials we faced, offering solace and advice to those embarking on this challenging path. Conception wasn't our only s...
Aug 02, 2023•55 min
Should I date someone who is struggling with porn? This question delves deep into the heart of a complex issue that affects many individuals. In this eye-opening episode, Jason and Lauren courageously explore the underlying reasons behind why people turn to porn. At its core, porn is not merely an isolated problem but often a response to more profound emotional issues. Addiction, in general, arises when we feel disconnected from our own lives. Instead of just focusing on sobriety, the real antid...
Jul 26, 2023•42 min
In episode 28, Jason and Lauren interview their good friend and colleague, Dr. Margaret Nagib, about gender differences from a psychological and neuroscientific perspective. In the context of our current culture, which seems to be working to ignore the differences between men and women, it's critical to understand that there are biological and chemical differences between men and women that contribute to real gender differences that play out in our day to day relationships. In particular, conver...
Jul 19, 2023•48 min
Many individuals frequently mistake passion for love, but in reality, love is a deliberate decision, while passion emerges from a profound connection. Understanding this distinction holds great significance because people often abandon their love when the initial intense passion diminishes. However, it's essential to recognize that passion can be revitalized by actively nurturing and strengthening the bond between partners. In Episode 27, Jason and Lauren delve into several practical tools that ...
Jul 10, 2023•38 min
Marriages and families are in trouble, statistics tell us, and infidelity is a part of the problem! 15% of women and 25% of men engage in extramarital affairs, and those number increase by 20% if you include emotional affairs according the the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy in 2015. Why in the world does this happen? What are the issues that couples face, the lies that people tend to believe that contribute to infidelity, and is it really possible to repair a marriage after ...
Jul 05, 2023•49 min
How in the world are parents supposed to navigate the taboo subject of sexuality with their kids in a way that steers them clear of the messages of perversion, shame, guilt and fear that culture and media promote so freely? One thing we know for sure is that “the talk” about the birds and the bees cannot be your only tool! Creating a culture inside your home where connection is available, curiosity is welcomed, and communication is expected is the best way to set the stage for age-appropriate co...
Jun 28, 2023•41 min
In this episode, Jason and Lauren answer several questions sent in by the audience! Topics range from dating to marriage, and in between. Enjoy! Patreon If you've enjoyed this podcast, would you consider financially supporting the show? Every donation, big and small, helps the Vallottons continue to prioritize making this content for you. Click this link to support ! Thank you! For information on the Marriage Intensive and other resources, go to jasonandlaurenvallotton.com ! Connect with Lauren:...
Jun 21, 2023•45 min
In episode 23, Jason and Lauren interview Lauren’s parents about their side of the story regarding Lauren dating and marrying a divorced guy with children! Married for 41 years, The Acsell’s have long been a model of love and devotion for Jason and Lauren, and how they navigated the hard transition of Lauren moving across the country and marrying into a ready-made family are admirable, to say the least. In this episode are keys for keeping relational connection strong with adult children, tips f...
Jun 14, 2023•1 hr 1 min
The KYLO Show is a podcast hosted by Danny Silk and Brittney Serpell. They discuss "the principles and practices of keeping your love on and how to build, protect, and pass on healthy families from one generation to the next." Danny and Brittney interviewed Jason and Lauren about their journey of dating well in the midst of their less-than-fairytale circumstances! Enjoy! Patreon If you've enjoyed this podcast, would you consider financially supporting the show? Every donation, big and small, hel...
Jun 07, 2023•49 min
In Part 2 of A Plan for Pain , Jason and Lauren talk specifically about how most of us don't really know how to walk through a process of forgiveness. People tend to be so afraid of pain that we avoid the very process that leads to true and lasting freedom! Firstly, we have to change the way we see pain. The truth is that every painful thought is a GIFT because mourning leads to comfort. The typical response to pain is to stuff it down or ignore it. However, without the process of mourning, you ...
May 30, 2023•51 min
This is the first in a series of two episodes addressing the idea that every person experiences pain in life, whether relational hurt, trauma, disappointment or hardship. No one is immune to life’s punches! In this episode, Jason and Lauren talk about the fact that pain has a voice that says, “fix me now!” And if we don’t learn to proactively navigate through the pain, we get stuck ignoring, stuffing, or coping with it in some way, never truly healing, because time is not a healer but rather a r...
May 24, 2023•38 min
In episode 19, Jason and Lauren address making a decision to start a family and how to navigate this huge season shift in a way that protects your marriage connection and adds to the relational health and thriving of your family. Ultimately, having kids is the absolute greatest blessing, but according to the Vallottons, if you have the luxury of proactively addressing certain things with your spouse before welcoming little ones into the picture, you should! Patreon If you've enjoyed this podcast...
May 17, 2023•36 min
In this episode, Jason and Lauren share one tip for success in blended families; build strong bonds of connection! Emotional connection is critical for the health of every family, but blended families don't have the luxury of enjoying the "from birth" chemical bonds that play a huge role in attachment and connection that biological parents have with their children. That said, there are many things that people can do intentionally to forge new bonds in a blended family context, which actually ena...
May 10, 2023•35 min
Episode 17 is a follow-up conversation to the previous episode’s interview with Cole and Caitlin Zick of Moral Revolution. In this episode, Jason and Lauren begin by explaining more about how sex inside of marriage is really all about the pursuit of intimacy. Lauren shares that how she experienced her sex drive before and in marriage were entirely different and that many people find that their expectations of sex in marriage aren’t met. Jason and Lauren unpack common reasons (stress, pressure, k...
May 03, 2023•1 hr 3 min
When people struggle with their sexual connection inside of marriage, it’s often because of pain/trauma from their past, their unrealistic expectations of sex inside of marriage and/or their unwillingness to reach out for help in this area. Unfortunately, sex has been a topic that’s full of shame and full of pain for many people, therefore it’s largely avoided in the church. However, this doesn’t set couples up for success as they enter marriage! The hope is that through sharing stories and givi...
Apr 26, 2023•56 min
Episode 15 is full of insights that are especially helpful for people in the newlywed season of life! Jason and Lauren begin by sharing a perspective on the covenant of marriage that can really set newlywed couples up to make the most of this adjustment period into their new life together. The newlywed season is meant to be an incredible season of bonding, exploration and establishment in a marriage, and each person enters this new chapter with a long list of expectations which may or may not be...
Apr 19, 2023•54 min
In this episode, Jason and Lauren host a conversation with their good friends, Aaron and Jenna Zint. Aside from the wisdom and street cred that come from 14 years of marriage and three little kids, Jenna and Aaron have years of professional experience in the relational health arena that make them excellent resources on the topic! Together, they offer couples coaching and host an excellent podcast called The Marriage Lab (link below). Aaron is an author and also offers emotional, relational and s...
Apr 12, 2023•1 hr 6 min
Life is hard, and in relationships, it's our healthy culture and firm foundation that enable us to navigate life when things go sideways. Unforeseen and challenging circumstances are inevitable, but they don't have to leave you broken and disconnected from the people in your life that are meant to be a strength to you in the hardship. In this episode, Jason and Lauren talk about changing way you see hard times so that you can get the most out of these seasons. They also share a list of keys for ...
Apr 05, 2023•1 hr 7 min
In Episode 12, Jason and Lauren introduce the concept of Connection as the goal of intimate relationships. Connection is a felt closeness and deep, enjoyable bond between two people. Attachment styles in childhood greatly impact our ability to bond with other humans. In order to feel deeply fulfilled inside of marriage or intimate relationships, connection must be strong, and connection is built on a foundation of trust which you must proactively grow! Here are some of the keys addressed in this...
Mar 29, 2023•57 min
In episode 11, Jason and Lauren take some time to answer 4 specific questions submitted by listeners like you! Each of the questions came as listeners enjoyed episode 9, Dating After Divorce . As Jason and Lauren answer questions, you’ll hear them discuss topics including processing pain, a healthy pace for dating after walking through trauma, how to navigate dating when kids are involved, and solidifying our identities with God as our source. Patreon If you've enjoyed this podcast, would you co...
Mar 22, 2023•51 min
No matter your personality type, background, or lifestyle preferences, human nature is to be somewhat change-averse. Humans appreciate a measure of predictability and certainty in life, but life is just a series of changes and transitions, one after another! So how do we set ourselves up to defy the statistical odds that would tell us that major life changes and seasonal transitions would damage relational connection? In Episode 10 of Dates, Mates and Babies with the Vallottons , Jason and Laure...
Mar 15, 2023•43 min
In this episode, Jason and Lauren share their heart for equipping people to date well after divorce, but this episode is relevant to anyone with a past of any sort! Working through your past is a critical step in moving into healthy future relationships. One of the greatest risks involved in dating after a divorce is trying to jump into another relationship too soon. There is a lot of healing ground to cover before you know if you’re ready to date again! Going through a divorce is like having a ...
Mar 08, 2023•58 min
This is Part 2 of a conversation on conflict resolution! If you haven’t listened to Part 1, pause, and go back to the episode released on February 22, 2023! In Part 1, Jason and Lauren unpack the difference between conflict and BEHAVIORS in conflict, which can really make or break a relationship. They make reference to one of their favorite resources on relational health, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman. Here in Part 2, Jason and Lauren discuss what can be done proa...
Mar 01, 2023•58 min
So many people are terrified of conflict inside of their close relationships, and very few people feel really confident in their ability to engage in conflict in a really healthy and helpful way. But the truth is, a conflict-free relationship doesn’t make for a healthy relationship! Conflict is a natural and even necessary part of intimate relationships because conflict is the working out of two different peoples’ differences. In this episode, Jason and Lauren discuss how they grew up on opposit...
Feb 22, 2023•50 min
This is the second and final episode in which Jason and Lauren share the details of their dating story. It’s been thirteen years this week since their first date! In Episode 6, they unpacked the following and more: what it was like to date each other while Lauren’s family had deep concerns because of the blended family situation, how they knew they loved each other, their first kiss, and how they got to the point where they knew they wanted to marry each other. Also included in this episode are ...
Feb 15, 2023•41 min
Thirteen years ago this month, Jason asked Lauren out on their first date! So in honor of their dating anniversary and Valentine’s Day, they share their dating story in this episode! Who doesn’t love a good dating story?! Theirs has many twists and turns as Jason had been previously married and was a dad of three while Lauren was a student in the school where Jason was an overseer. There’s plenty of juicy details in this episode, so it’s chock-full of entertainment, but they also teach through p...
Feb 08, 2023•1 hr 1 min
This is the third and final episode in the Foundations of Relational Health series, and Jason and Lauren unpack boundaries: what they are and are not! Among other things, boundaries help us protect our main mission, our priorities, and our love for people. Jesus is our best model for how to use boundaries in order to stick to His mission in life! He responded to life from a confident posture, knowing that He was about His Father’s business. We need a sense of calling in order to know where our y...
Feb 01, 2023•58 min
