This is my very first live call-in chat with a "Dear DSO" submission. You can submit your own question or story to https://deardso.com. In this one, Christopher talks about how he has been married three times, engaged once, dealt with his bipolar disorder... and now falling in love again with a much younger single mother of three that lives in his apartment complex. Lots to talk about in this almost hour-long live chat! Some things discussed: How much has his bipolar disorder contributed to the ...
Nov 25, 2024•1 hr•Ep. 259
In this episode, Ralph examines the challenges men often face after divorce, noting that 70% of men are surprised by their partners' decision to leave. He discusses the emotional and physical loneliness these men experience, as well as their quick attempts to start new relationships. The episode looks at the reasons behind mid-life divorces, such as perimenopause and changes in focus once children are adults. The episode also addresses dating for men in their 40s, warning against rushing into re...
Nov 22, 2024•13 min•Ep. 258
Ralph examines the emotional turmoil that follows infidelity, focusing on the psychological effects on those who have been wronged. The discussion highlights betrayal, trust issues, and psychological disorders, offering an in-depth look at dysfunctional relationships. Join the HFM Brotherhood!
Nov 18, 2024•6 min•Ep. 257
Everyone seems to be talking about DUTY SEX right now. Why is this such a hot-button topic? What exactly is it, anyway? Should women do it? Should men accept it? This is a series of clips from our last HFM Brotherhood meeting. We hold several different live meeting Zoom meetings every single week and record all of them for our members to listen back to later. We also have private discussion forums, all my books for free, a members-only podcast, in-person conferences, and more! Join us: https://h...
Nov 15, 2024•12 min•Ep. 256
This episode of "Dear DSO" addresses a common couple's issue: reduced sexual intimacy. Ralph shares a letter from Jack, a 40-year-old struggling with a near-nonexistent sex life in his 10-year marriage. Jack notes that he and his wife have been intimate five times in five years. Despite his efforts to spark romance, his wife remains uninterested, which strains their relationship. Ralph examines the complexity of sexless marriages, focusing on Jack’s situation and suggesting practical solutions. ...
Nov 11, 2024•8 min•Ep. 255
In this episode, Ralph examines the changes men undergo when shifting from "nice guys" to more confident "alpha males." He discusses how a personal crisis often triggers this transformation, referencing Dr. Robert Glover's "No More Mr. Nice Guy." Ralph analyzes how today's dating world rewards confidence and extroversion, though sometimes at the expense of sincerity and emotional connection. Join The HFM Brotherhood!
Nov 08, 2024•9 min•Ep. 254
In the latest episode of 'Dear DSO,' Ralph responds to a question from a participant called "Wordsmith." Wordsmith compares the decline of workplace wages to the decrease of intimacy in relationships, questioning why some women expect their partners to stay in a sexless marriage indefinitely. Ralph takes this opportunity to discuss relationship challenges, comparing professional and personal commitments. Join the HFM Brotherhood!...
Nov 04, 2024•12 min•Ep. 253
A follower reaches out and shares the typical "anxious man/avoidant wife" scenario we hear about so often, but this time with one twist: His wife does seem to want sex, but it's only in an apparent attempt to get her sexual need met. There's no connection with him, at all. She seems very much disconnected emotionally from him and doesn't seem interested in fixing the problem. Join the HFM Brotherhood!
Oct 30, 2024•14 min•Ep. 252
A lot of people have been sending me the link to a video interview between Sadia Khan and Matthew Hussey. In this episode of DSO Reacts, I break down a couple of points that Sadia makes about women and cheating, and give my two cents (hint: I agree). Join The HFM Brotherhood!
Oct 24, 2024•18 min•Ep. 251
In this episode of Dear DSO, Ralph discusses the topic of how men relax and how women perceive it. This subject was brought up by a contributor named Mr. Wordsmith 380. Ralph talks about why women might find men's leisure activities, especially when they're alone, annoying or misunderstood. He looks at the habits of male relaxation and how society views gender roles. Ralph explains that men tend to separate different parts of their lives, which allows them to enjoy doing nothing or being in a me...
Oct 18, 2024•9 min•Ep. 250
Ralph examines the psychology behind men's perceived scarcity in the dating world and its effect on their interactions with women. He looks at how this mindset influences their reactions to women's choices, whether it's about promiscuity or opting out of dating entirely. Ralph uses real examples and hypothetical scenarios to show how these dynamics work and offers strategies for men to deal with feelings of scarcity. Ralph says many men feel they have limited options in relationships due to self...
Oct 14, 2024•9 min•Ep. 249
Ralph discusses pornography, sex work, and their psychological and social effects. He starts by examining the historical background of these industries, disproving the idea that they are recent inventions and instead showing they meet long-standing demands. He then addresses the psychological impacts on men who frequently watch porn, noting the risks of addiction and challenges in forming real-life sexual relationships. On a wider societal level, Ralph points out the negative influence of pornog...
Oct 11, 2024•4 min•Ep. 248
Ralph responds to a question from a YouTube viewer, Jason, about the dynamics of hooking up—not dating—after a divorce. Ralph explains the complexities of post-divorce relationships, especially for men who are anxious and how this can affect their decisions and emotions. Ralph goes into the mindset of newly divorced men, especially those who are anxious and focused on self-improvement. He highlights the risks and emotional pitfalls of jumping into new intimate encounters too soon. Using various ...
Oct 07, 2024•5 min•Ep. 247
Ralph addresses a letter from a listener named Dunk, dealing with the aftermath of his wife's infidelity. The episode explores the challenges of handling betrayal, mental health issues, and co-parenting with a difficult ex-partner. Ralph gives practical advice to help Dunk set boundaries, communicate effectively, and focus on personal growth. Dunk's situation is complex, as his wife started a relationship with her younger boss, showing narcissistic traits and causing turmoil. Ralph stresses the ...
Oct 04, 2024•7 min•Ep. 246
Ralph discusses a listener-submitted story from Thomas about relationship issues and maintaining intimacy in marriage. The episode, titled "Wife not worried about being left," covers a relatable situation for many men. Ralph provides clear advice, addressing themes like religious constraints, emotional detachment, and personal growth. Thomas talks about his marital problems after a lack of intimacy and an eye-opening experience from reading "The Dead Bedroom Fix." Despite self-improvement effort...
Sep 30, 2024•13 min•Ep. 245
Ralph discusses the widespread issue of scarcity mindset among men, especially in relationships. He explains the harmful effects of a scarcity mindset and how it manifests in negative comments and a pessimistic view of life and relationships. Ralph talks about the need to shift from a scarcity to an abundance mindset, particularly in relationships. He explains how negative self-talk and a defeatist attitude keep men trapped in a cycle of negativity and failure. Through relatable stories and dire...
Sep 27, 2024•10 min•Ep. 244
In this episode, Ralph delves into the controversial topic of "lesbian bed death" and the unusually high divorce rates among lesbian couples compared to their heterosexual and gay male counterparts. Ralph uses statistical data from the Office for National Statistics and explores the psychological underpinnings and societal expectations that might contribute to these phenomena. He discusses the role of neuroticism—a major personality trait prevalent in women—that impacts relationship satisfaction...
Sep 23, 2024•12 min•Ep. 243
Ralph delves deep into the emotional traumas many men face due to infidelity and broken relationships. He critically examines the burgeoning trend of male victimhood and the echo chambers that fuel it. Ralph emphasizes the importance of sticking to factual data rather than sensationalized statistics when discussing issues like divorce rates and paternity fraud. Join The HFM Brotherhood!
Sep 20, 2024•9 min•Ep. 242
Ralph addresses the stigma surrounding infidelity and provides a nuanced perspective on why it might happen. He kicks off by debunking the myth that most women in relationships cheat, presenting scientific evidence and personal experiences to show that cheating is actually less common than some might believe. Ralph emphasizes that certain subsets of men, particularly those he identifies as "anxious dudes," are more likely to encounter infidelity due to their tendency to partner with individuals ...
Sep 16, 2024•20 min•Ep. 241
Ralph delves into an intriguing message from a Facebook follower that serves as a perfect illustration of the typical challenges faced by men in today's dating and relationship landscape. The follower, whose message Ralph dissects, shares his frustrations and experiences with relationships that have led him to a place of cynicism and resentment towards women. Ralph takes this opportunity to provide insightful commentary on the follower's mindset and the broader issues that plague modern relation...
Sep 13, 2024•7 min•Ep. 240
Ralph delves deep into the distressing world of infidelity, targeting the psychology behind why women cheat in relationships. Through a blend of data, anecdotal evidence, and expert insights, Ralph addresses the quintessential question plaguing many men who discover their partner has been unfaithful: Why? He pulls no punches in his explanation, setting the stage for an honest, potentially provocative discussion on the emotional and psychological dysfunctions often underpinning infidelity. Join T...
Sep 09, 2024•8 min•Ep. 239
Ralph addresses a poignant letter from Jay, a long-time listener seeking advice on how to revive the dwindling romance in his marriage. The letter, filled with raw emotion, highlights Jay's struggle with feelings of inadequacy and longing after discovering his partner's emotional affair seven years into their relationship. Despite attempts at couples therapy and personal efforts to rekindle their connection, Jay finds himself stuck in a monotonous routine, with his partner seemingly disengaged a...
Sep 06, 2024•17 min•Ep. 234
Ralph dives into a unique and complex relationship concern that's been submitted by one of our listeners, who goes by the pseudonym "Could be worse." In this episode, Ralph tackles the anxiety and insecurity surrounding permission-based intimacy in long-term relationships, especially in the face of health-related challenges. In our listener's scenario, his wife suffers from unspecified health issues that inhibit frequent, fulfilling intimacy. Despite this, she enjoys and permits him to "use" her...
Aug 30, 2024•10 min•Ep. 233
Ralph addresses a deeply personal letter from a listener named Jay, who is grappling with significant intimacy issues in his ten-year marriage. The common theme throughout this episode revolves around navigating the intricate web of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and its implications on marital intimacy, emotional disconnect, and the potential for infidelity. Jay's story revolves around his wife's OCD, which creates barriers to physical affection, leaving him feeling unattractive and unsati...
Aug 23, 2024•6 min•Ep. 238
Confused Husband seeks advice from Ralph on handling a toxic marriage where his wife despises his daughter and exhibits abusive behavior. He reveals deep-seated issues including threats, accusations of infidelity, and financial concerns tied to potential divorce. Ralph provides critical advice, highlighting the importance of cutting ties with the abusive spouse, seeking legal and emotional support, and reflecting on his own patterns that led to this relationship. Join the HFM Brotherhood!...
Aug 21, 2024•11 min•Ep. 237
Ralph addresses John’s heart-wrenching predicament: his wife’s affair led to their separation, and now she wants to come back. Ralph sheds light on different types of affairs, emphasizing the deeply ingrained issues often underlying such actions. He suggests that John’s wife may be seeking a safety net rather than genuine reconciliation. Join the HFM Brotherhood!
Aug 19, 2024•12 min•Ep. 236
A 50-year-old man, Mister In Between, seeks advice from Ralph on rebuilding his life post-divorce. Diagnosed with depression and mild bipolar disorder, he grapples with isolation, a dead bedroom from a 28-year marriage, and navigating new social dynamics. Ralph discusses the risks and benefits of casual sexual encounters and the potential pitfalls of rebound relationships. He emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and caution in exploring new connections. Join the HFM Brotherhood!...
Aug 14, 2024•12 min•Ep. 235
Ralph tackles a heartfelt query from a listener named "Help," who is grappling with the challenges posed by his wife's debilitating condition, POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome). The listener's frustration over a sexless marriage, compounded by the daily struggles of managing a child with autism, paints a vivid picture of marital strain and the desperate need for guidance. Join the HFM Brotherhood!
Aug 12, 2024•9 min•Ep. 232
Ralph addresses a poignant message from Lana, a 42-year-old woman facing a significant marital dilemma. Despite being attractive, fit, and highly sexual, Lana struggles with her husband's distant and emotionally abusive behavior. Over their 25 years of marriage, Lana has grown weary of her husband's lack of affection and wonders if the time has come to leave and seek a fulfilling life elsewhere. This scenario should sound familiar to many of you! Click here to join the HFM Brotherhood!...
Aug 08, 2024•7 min•Ep. 231
Ralph addresses Adnor's dilemma about seeking counseling for relationship issues without making it feel like an ultimatum. Drawing from real-life examples, Ralph emphasizes the importance of genuine effort and patience in resolving relationship problems. He discusses the complexities of seeking couples counseling and the necessity of finding a competent counselor who can mediate effectively. Ralph also explores the challenges of changing deeply ingrained behaviors and expectations in a relations...
Jul 22, 2024•9 min•Ep. 230
