I started Beyond the Self when I was 27 years old, recordings would be in my wardrobe in a small box room at my Mama's house, in the thick of deep personal change. I had moved back to the family home after a tough breakup. I was a couple of years into building my company, 4 years into sharing my story of sabotaging my entire life and being forced to get sober. Years into allowing my work to exist publicly. And although I had my convictions, I was uncertain, curious, and committed to growth. All ...
Jun 16, 2025•44 min
Oh my goodness. This conversation is everything I needed, and more. I’m joined by one of my best friends and favourite humans on this planet, the incredible Rui Liu, a child of tea and founder of Grass People Tree. We went beyond what you might expect from a conversation that centres tea (though we go deep into that too). We found ourselves going into culture, identity, ancestry, friendship, artistry, business, beauty, rebellion, ritual… all of it. We talk about Rui’s childhood in rural China, h...
May 05, 2025•1 hr 57 min
I’ve been thinking a lot about the ways we convince ourselves we’re doing something noble - spiritual, even - when really, we’re just avoiding the thing that actually wants to set us free. Like last week, this conversation is personal. It’s present. And it’s pulled straight from the patterns I’ve had to face, and some I’m still facing, in real time. If you’re someone who’s ever thought or said ‘I’m just protecting my peace’ while secretly knowing that something deeper is going unaddressed, this ...
Mar 24, 2025•58 min
WOW! I really went there with you for this one. March is here, Spring is upon us, which means my 2025 begins. I return here with fresh thoughts and an open heart. I'm learning to allow myself to share the truth of what's happening in REAL TIME, instead of only sharing retrospectively, and as a very reflective but also private person - this feels exposing, yet insanely liberating. I am practicing what I preach. I am practicing courage. I am practicing brave expression. And it's making me trust my...
Mar 10, 2025•1 hr 2 min
What does belonging look like for you? Can you think of a time when you navigated the space between two cultures, and how did it shape your identity? These are themes I'm exploring today with my guest, Caro Gomez. Caro opens up about her journey of figuring out her identity and finding her place, sharing the ups and downs of blending cultures and the hurdles she jumped over. We also explore the idea of privilege, cultural pride, and the emotional rollercoaster of staying true to her roots while ...
Sep 23, 2024•1 hr 24 min•Ep. 89
I know there's a sense of hopelessness in the world right now, and to be very honest, there always will be. And something that I want to do here is I don't want us to deny reality. That is not what we do. And at the same time, I want you to look at the areas of your life where you are in the driver's seat. In this episode, I want to impart my wisdom, experiences, and intellectual property and share anything I'm learning that I think could be useful for you. So tune in to hear me riff aloud about...
Sep 09, 2024•17 min•Ep. 88
Tired of feeling like you're constantly tripping over your own feet when it comes to sex and intimacy? You're not alone. Let's get real about the sneaky ways self-sabotage creeps into our bedrooms. In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on the dirty little secrets that might be holding you back. From the mind-bending effects of porn to the pressure cooker of societal expectations, I dive into the stuff that really matters. Tune in to hear how you can break free from the shackles of shame ...
Jul 29, 2024•57 min•Ep. 87
Feeling like the system's rigged against you? Join us as Sharmadean Reid MBE, founder of The Stack and author of "New Methods for Women," dismantles that narrative. In this episode, we explore Sharmadean's journey of overcoming societal barriers, navigating limited resources, and redefining success on her own terms. Discover how she balanced creative and spiritual growth with financial empowerment, all while building wealth and escaping a scarcity mindset. This is an episode packed with practica...
Jul 08, 2024•1 hr 11 min•Ep. 86
Do you find yourself avoiding conflict at all costs? In this episode, I explore the surprising impact conflict avoidance can have on our ability to build strong, intimate relationships. I also discuss the reasons behind this behaviour, examining the potential influence of our upbringing on conflict styles. The episode will challenge your perception of conflict as purely negative, as I believe it has the potential to foster deeper connections. I also share some strategies for navigating difficult...
Jul 01, 2024•31 min•Ep. 85
Discomfort. It's that feeling that makes you want to crawl back under the covers. But what if I told you it could be the key to unlocking your full potential? In this episode, we'll DITCH the dictionary definitions and dive deep into the world of discomfort. I explore why stepping outside your comfort zone might be the best thing you can do for yourself (even if it doesn't feel like it at first!). Plus, I talk about the science behind discomfort and growth, share tips for shifting your mindset, ...
Jun 17, 2024•45 min•Ep. 83
Ever feel like a fraud despite your accomplishments? That nagging voice whispering "you're not good enough". What if that discomfort isn't a sign you're a 'fraud', but a nudge in the right direction? We often slap the "imposter" label on any flicker of unease, but sometimes it's a learning curve, not a character flaw. In this episode, I'm reflecting on a change I made in my business and a full-blown imposter alert went off in my head! But upon reflection, the truth smacked me upside down: it was...
Jun 10, 2024•43 min•Ep. 82
Are you ready to unravel the mysteries of modern love and intimacy? Today I'm joined by renowned psychotherapist and sex therapist, Todd Baratz. Together, we're peeling back the layers of how our personal histories shape the way we handle conflict and connect intimately with others. We're tackling the tough questions: How do self-awareness and open communication empower us to defy societal pressures and those pesky, unrealistic expectations in our romantic lives? What impact do past traumas have...
Jun 03, 2024•54 min•Ep. 81
What a whirlwind this past week since my book has been published and has been in your hands! It's been a crazy but amazing past few years writing my book, The Third Perspective and I appreciate every single one of you who has purchased it, supported and shared with me what you think. This episode is more of an update of what's been going on in my life, as well as some reflections on my book launch and how I've been feeling in the days since it's been out. Plus I'm sharing with a little insight i...
May 27, 2024•22 min•Ep. 80
Get ready for an engaging conversation as I sit down with my dear friend, Mark Vicente. Many of you might recognise him as the whistle-blower for the cult NXIVM, but there's so much more to him than that. Mark is not just a public figure; he's an author, a speaker, and the cinematographer behind the iconic film Sarafina! Together, we explore the intense demands placed upon us by social media, our battles with how the public sees us, and being honest in our self-expression. Mark shares with us hi...
Apr 15, 2024•1 hr 25 min•Ep. 79
This is something I'm experiencing firsthand. It's tender, and while some of me still feels low, I'm driven to share my insights with you from my recent experience of rejection. From viewing rejection as feedback to cultivating resilience and prompting deep self-reflection, in this episode I share 5 learnings that have reshaped my perspective. So, if you're facing rejection, remember—it's not defeat but a chance for growth and transformation. Don't forget to pre-order my book , The Third Perspec...
Apr 01, 2024•27 min•Ep. 78
Today I want to revisit an episode I did that focused on the importance of rejecting urgency culture. I share some things I'm doing personally and riff out loud with you as well. From honouring my own timeline and why it seems like we are all in such a rush, why I'm dedicated to simplifying and going deeper, to how I'm learning to set realistic expectations without compromising my standards. Don't forget to pre-order my book , The Third Perspective: Brave Expression in The Age of Intolerance Dow...
Mar 25, 2024•33 min•Ep. 77
I have my thoughts about what it means to love and be loved in the modern world. What's the real cost of swiping right? Is there truth to attachment styles or has it become a (Western) collective obsession? Is the dating scene really as demotivating and disturbing as people say? In this special episode, I'm joined by someone I've wanted to speak to for a while; the ever-insightful Rebecca Archer. Rebecca, a poet whose words bleed raw emotion, shares her battlefield stories from the front lines o...
Mar 18, 2024•1 hr 20 min•Ep. 76
Do you keep avoiding help from others? I'm guilty as charged. In this episode, I'm exploring the obstacles of seeking help and the profound challenge of accepting it. I've battled with this myself, particularly when I was neck-deep in writing my book. I had this mind-blowing psychedelic trip, coupled with deep meditation, and it hit me like a ton of bricks—the lesson of opening up, of not letting this hyper-independence trap me in a "golden cage." It's about the give-and-take, the law of recipro...
Mar 04, 2024•20 min•Ep. 75
Have you ever wondered what it's like to confront your deepest struggles head-on? Today, I'm revisiting a past episode where I talk about my letter addressing my battle with alcoholism, a letter I wrote in 2017. This letter is a testament to my growth and the crucial role of self-acceptance in my life. I've learned that honesty isn't just a policy; it's the foundation of who I am and who I've become. Join me as I honour the resilience of my past self and dive deep into a conversation about ident...
Feb 26, 2024•36 min•Ep. 74
As we journey through life, clashes in values and beliefs are inevitable, often leading to the discomfort of disappointing others. Especially in the realm of online interactions, where diverse perspectives collide, staying true to our integrity can sometimes mean disappointing those around us. In this episode I explore how the pervasive influence of cancel culture amplifies the fear of disappointing others, stifling our authenticity and forcing conformity. But here's the truth: embracing the lib...
Feb 19, 2024•27 min•Ep. 73
I am so, so deeply grateful for everybody who has pre-ordered my book, The Third Perspective: Brave Expression in The Age of Intolerance . Your support means so much to me! In this episode, I'm discussing something that over the past 8 years, I've grappled with and have refined as time has gone by - this notion of managing who has access to you. Be it friends, romantic partners, family, clients, audience, colleagues, even internet strangers…I covered it all! It’s easy to think that when I speak ...
Feb 12, 2024•53 min•Ep. 72
Ever walked into a room and felt an INSTANT connection with someone without a single word exchanged? That magnetic energy, that unspoken charisma – that's the power of seduction beyond the obvious. In this episode, I'm stripping away the sexual connotations of the term 'seduction' to explore how it applies to our everyday lives. It's not about manipulation - it's about authentically refining who you are. From feeling something after watching an ad to leaving a memorable impression on everyone yo...
Jan 29, 2024•46 min•Ep. 71
In this mini-sode I give you an update on all things book, love, life, and VOICE. Although you might not think it, there’s an area where I still experience STRONG RESISTANCE when it comes to activating my voice. Singing. Yes, SINGING. I didn’t expect I would be sharing this in today’s episode but here we are. If you sometimes find it difficult to put effort into things you're passionate about too, and fear is holding you back, this episode is also for you. I’ll be encouraging you to embrace thos...
Jan 23, 2024•26 min•Ep. 70
WE ARE BACK! As we step into the new year, join me as I riff out loud and explore how our social circles influence our personal success; whether we realise it or not. And whether we LIKE it or not. In this episode, I remind you to reflect on the relationships you keep close to you and get honest about how they are helping you expand, or how they might be keeping you stagnant. I had a lot of fun with this one! And some truths were brought to the table, but what’s new…😉 RESOURCES MENTIONED: #018 ...
Jan 08, 2024•51 min•Ep. 69
Ever wondered how each new experience moulds the person you're evolving into? Join me in a powerful exploration of self-awareness and transformation. As decisions about who we are in this world unfold, fundamental changes ripple through our beings, shaping our growth. In this episode, I invite you to witness the beauty of conscious evolution, unravel the language of outgrowing, and reflect honestly on who and what we've outgrown. It's also the perfect time to reflect, grow, and reject the pressu...
Dec 25, 2023•28 min•Ep. 68
What happens when you start defining yourself, and your way of being by your attachment style? Do they confine us, creating a trap we unwittingly fall into? In this episode I'm exploring if placing a label on ourselves does us any justice. I share my journey, navigating the nuances of Dismissive Avoidant and Fearful Avoidant styles, exploring solitude and the rollercoaster of ambivalence in relationships. It's a journey that questions the very essence of attachment style labels. So if you're cur...
Dec 18, 2023•48 min•Ep. 67
Join me in exploring the impactful journey of H, a listener navigating entitlement during pivotal life moments. H shares her experience with entitlement during pregnancy and childbirth. This episode explores the broader theme of politicizing intimate aspects of our lives and why it's important to stand firm in your experience and not allow others to dictate or deny it. I also opened up about my challenges in maintaining authenticity within my sexual wellness company, Cherry Revolution. Sharing w...
Dec 11, 2023•41 min•Ep. 66
These past few months have felt heavy. After writing my book for what seemed to be going on for 3 years, I had to rewrite it as I realised I was writing the wrong book. So that's where I've been, rewriting my book which is now in the safe hands of my publishers. I also want to update you on the on-and-off relationship with my ex, the person I love the deepest and share my insights in real-time. So tune in and let's catch up. Resources Mentioned: #048 - Grieving someone who’s still alive (dealing...
Dec 04, 2023•25 min•Ep. 65
No matter what we say or do, there's always someone ready to dissect, criticise, or just plain misinterpret us. But should we let that silence us? Absolutely not. In this episode I ask you some important questions to help you see where you are holding back, censoring your thoughts, or watering down your message because you fear being misunderstood. It's something many of us grapple with, especially in today's climate where even everyday conversations can feel like minefields. So, join me as I ex...
Oct 02, 2023•16 min•Ep. 64
Lately, I've been thinking about the labels society places on us. You might know me as a ‘content creator’ or as someone who influences, but that's just what you see on the surface. My daily work delves deeper than I could ever show you online. It involves extensive research and mentorship. I'm all about exploring self-sabotage and self-censorship and understanding the truth of our human experience. My work and mission requires slowness and intentionally, both of which can trigger the feeling of...
Sep 18, 2023•28 min•Ep. 63
