# 643 - ERNEST Thinks I’m a Food Cuck - podcast episode cover

# 643 - ERNEST Thinks I’m a Food Cuck

Sep 25, 20242 hr 58 min
--:--
--:--
Listen in podcast apps:

Episode description

I sit down with singer-songwriter, Ernest. We talk about growing up with Mookie Betts, lyrics he loves, touring with Morgan Wallen, writing songs for other artists, and ERNEST sings an unreleased song live.  Check out his album “Nashville, Tennessee” here: https://ernestofficial.lnk.to/NashvilleTN  Follow YT: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCE-bW2L6yjxEYmJwUL5ryBQ IG: https://www.instagram.com/ernest/?hl=en  --------------------------------------------------- Sponsors: iRestore - Reverse hair loss with iRestore and get $600 off with the code BERTCAST at https://bit.ly/3Tuq8ER #irestorepod BetterHelp - Get 10% off your first month at https://www.betterhelp.com/bert  BlueChew - Get your first month free at https://bluechew.com with promo code BERTCAST. Chubbies - Your summer wardrobe awaits! Get 20% off at Chubbies with the code BERTCAST20 at https://www.chubbiesshorts.com/bertcast20 --------------------------------------------------- SUBSCRIBE so you never miss a video https://bit.ly/3DC1ICg  For all TOUR DATES: http://www.bertbertbert.com  For Fully Loaded: https://fullyloadedfestival.com   For Merch: https://store.bertbertbert.com  YouTube▶ http://www.YouTube.com/user/Akreischer  X▶ http://www.Twitter.com/bertkreischer   Facebook▶ http://www.Facebook.com/BertKreischer   Instagram▶ http://www.Instagram.com/bertkreischer   TikTok▶ http://www.TikTok.com/@bertkreischer  Text Me▶ https://my.community.com/bertkreischer  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

Hey guys, make sure to check out the Burt and Leanne bundle, the best of both worlds bundle at BurtBurtBurt.com for $40 today. That's right. Check out the best of both worlds bundle with Burt and Leanne stuff starting today. $40 a bundle. Like I'm so bad that if you, if I make you a sandwich and I give it to you and you take a bite, I'll bite with you. I'll go. Dude, you're like a food cuck. Las Vegas, I am headed to Resorts World Theater September 27th and 28th. Two shows only.

Get your tickets at burpburpburp.com. The weed Jelly has with them? Yes. It's fucking wild. Dude, so Jelly and I go way back. Can we podcast? Sure, let's podcast. He's on weed on podcast? Yeah, of course. Can you roll? Yeah, I can. Definitely. And so I will. You and Jelly go way back? Mm-hmm. Me and Jelly go way back. We met in like 2011 or 12. And it was like...

I was buying dabs from his roommate at the time. In 2011? How old are you in 2011? I was just out of high school. Senior in high school, freshman in college. And, like, Jelly Roll was like... We knew about Jelly Roll as the rapper and OG and all that. Actually, a girl I was friends with in high school sold Jelly Roll her Suburban when we were sophomores or junior.

in high school and i went with her to that car exchange because she was like i'm selling my car to this guy named jelly roll and i was there for that so then fast forward like three years i'm doing my first like massive dab at jelly rolls like How's I shouldn't have been at... How was Jelly getting dabs back then?

Like dabs were hard. They were like right on the first people I was getting dabs for. Like Jelly Roll's team was so ahead of that, dude. Like, I don't know if you ever met Scary at part of his crew. So Scary was the guy we were buying dabs from and his roommate. And like, you know, they're like. The house was just lined with horror movie posters. Scary interior design to the place. It was literally cannibal corpse, all this shit. So I'm getting to...

I'd buy weed from Jelly Roll. And then I went to college. He went to jail. I know that song. Yeah, right. That's how that... It's the first song on... I'm really bad at like... Because what I do is I listen to playlists. I listen to the first... like i go to i go to you there's a bunch of you guys that i'm like a fan of but like you guys are really different we're all very different you're i mean like you're very different what's crazy is you're you're very different

than even the songs that you write for the other people. Yes. Does that make sense? Yes. Can I tell you who you remind me of? I'd love to know. I hope you like this. Thank you. Chris Christopherson. Oh, my God. I love that. You write... I don't know the right way to say this. Because the songs you write for other guys are all fucking bangers. They're bangers. They're the biggest songs they have a lot of times in their playlist.

But then the songs you write for you are really like singer-songwriter, old school Nashville, like Willie, Chris Christopherson. Man, thank you. Like, this new album, I guess, came out in April. Yes, sir. I've been listening to it a lot. First of all, I'm obsessed with fucking Lainey Wilson. Dude, who isn't? She's so good. That's such a beautiful song. Man.

You know the story about that? No. So, do you know who Dean Dillon is? You should get… Hang on. I do. I do know Dean Dillon. Hang on. Hang on. I do know Dean Dillon. How do I know Dean Dillon? I know Dean Dillon because I just heard you tell a story about Dean Dillon. Dean's… A legendary songwriter. He goes, I don't play songs that...

I don't play funny. I don't like funny songs. I don't like funny songs. I don't like funny songs. And then he wrote Oceanfront Property. That was the irony of that. He almost didn't get in on that song. He checked. He was writing another song. He walks in while that song's getting written. He was like, I don't write.

write funny songs, walked away, couldn't help himself, came back and, you know, oceanfront property. So Dean, legend, wrote The Chair, wrote Tennessee Whiskey, which seems like it's an 80-year-old song. Anyways, we've kind of developed a little bit of relationship. His daughter, Jessie Jo, she's around Jelly Roll Camp too. Jessie Jo is a fantastic songwriter. And she texted me this demo, What If I Could.

and was like, hey, this is the only song my dad and Skip Ewing ever wrote. I think you'll like it. And I listened, fell in love with it immediately, lived with it for a few days. And this is like a 30-year-old song that just got shelved. I recorded a little voice note of it.

I texted it to Dean, who was like, hey, I think I'm going to cut this song. His response, damn son, if you're writing them like that, what do you need me for? And I'm like, dude, you wrote this song. You wrote this song, dude. It's 30 years old. Yeah, and then it hit him. And so the next day, the timing's insane, dude. The next day he calls me, he goes, you're not going to believe this. Rusty Gatson just called and said, Lainey Wilson is cutting a version of that same song.

She found it and I guess an old catalog got unlocked and these songs became available. So Lainey fell in love with it. She said she was going to record a version. So I called Lainey and I was like, hey, I'm going to cut this song. I hope whatever you're doing. I can still do it on my record. And she goes, well, hell yeah, I'll just sing it with you on yours. And I was like, yes, please. Thank you. I mean, it was the most serendipitous. That's crazy. Yeah. And I've always been proud of...

Writing my own songs on my record like that's kind of one of the things that separates like I love writing songs for other artists But then I can really be the voice of my own words and stories. But when a song like What If I Could comes across, that changed everything for me. Because like, oh, I get to be a steward of an amazing song. It really is.

That one and on the new album, that one, the one that opens the album is You and Jelly. I love that. It's a good curtain opener. It's a great song. It's a great song. It's an old school great song. It's got a great vibe. Did you... So you love old school country? I do. I do. Here's the thing about... I don't know the right way to say this, but like... I feel like...

Hip-hop and country really are kissing cousins and I don't think everyone sees it. I don't think I agree I don't think anyone understands that the reason I think you guys are doing so well is because you were influenced by country or by hip-hop and hip-hop has such a, it's such the same thumbprint in a lot of ways. Different furniture, but it's all storytelling and a lot of it from a, you know, like lower class drama, like.

You know, I don't know. It is. It's the same room, different furniture in it. And that's like why I love rap so much, too. I grew up, I got the Space Jam soundtrack for Christmas in the third grade. And, you know, otherwise grew up in a... Private Christian school. Hit them high, hit them low. Pull that shit up. So I grew up in a Christian school home that was not listening to hip hop. But my uncle, unbeknownst to him, put me on.

so hard when they gave me the Space Jam soundtrack because this song, I'm in the third grade with khaki shorts and a polo on rapping every word. And then I got a burnt CD, like a bunch of Slim Shady shit in the fourth and fifth grade. My vocabulary, I just was obsessed with rap and wordplay and rhyme and shit. Hit him high. There it is. I hit him high, hit him high, hit him high. Who sings Hit Him High? It's like... Look, Busta Rhymes, Coolio, LL Cool J.

Lightning strikes, the course lights get dim. Supreme competition is about to begin above the rim. Finesse and the moves is animated. Once I get the ball in, I can't be deflated. Rocking on my monster, you get the money. Quick, get the bunny. He's snatching up the honeys. That's crazy. That was like my DNA. It's my starter kit for everything was right there. Good God. It's wild that like hip hop, you know, it's like.

I'm always shocked when someone isn't into hip-hop. Do you know what I got worked up about? What? You're the perfect person. I'm going to say the most hateful thing. The entire country music fans are about to swarm on me. Okay? And I'm cool with the heat. I want the smoke. Turn it up. I don't understand pickup trucks. Oh, man. In a song? Nope.

I don't know why people buy them. Oh, straight up? Straight up. Like, you don't get the concept? Bro, let me tell you. All right. Hell yeah. Let me tell you why I get it. All right. First of all, are you... All right. Okay, no, go ahead. I know what you're going to say. Am I a Chevy guy or a Ford guy? No, no, no. Neither, neither, neither, neither. But the bed, though. Okay, I don't get it. Okay, so...

The truck was my first car. In 16, I got my granddad's truck. My dad drove a truck. And I guess for me, I always... implemented a truck bed whether it be baseball bags going to games my dad always had a milk carton of baseballs fungos baseball bags and like you know if we had to do trash runs my dad coached baseball for 46 years at David Lipscomb. So all of our home trash just went in the truck to the baseball field dumpster. We were our own trash people. And, you know, dude, so I've always...

Always loved having a truck bed. And for the last year and a half, I actually haven't had a truck. I've been in an Escalade. Love an Escalade. Yeah. But I've really, no matter what, I miss having a truck bed. And I just got a truck again. And I've been so happy. I'll be driving the truck everywhere. F-150? F-150. Yeah. Tremor. Nice little set of tires on it. I had an F-150 with a six-inch lift, 35s, 22-inch rims, badass, got stolen out of my driveway, never see it again. So what...

Having an Escalade. I can understand an Escalade. Love an Escalade. I can understand a Navigator. I can understand an Expedition. I can understand an Expedition. Why not Truck? You can touch my shit. People can touch my shit. But if your shit's touchable, like trash or… Very few people are going to look in the back of your truck and be like, I'm stealing that fucking bucket of baseball. That's such an inconvenient thing to steal. I wouldn't put your suitcase in the bed of your truck.

Every time. So my wife's family are big truck guys. Big truck. Now I'm a SUV guy. Okay. So every time. we get in their fucking truck in Alabama and it's a dually and it's got the back cab. Yeah. I always think to myself, we're all right here. Like, we're all so fucking close to each other. When you're in an SUV, I feel like there's room. A little more spacious. A little more spacious. Yeah, I feel like both...

or necessary. If you can afford to have both, there's days for a truck and then there's family days where the car and everybody can be in there. But man, I don't know. I'm not like a car nerd or a truck nerd. I have a 75 Coupe DeVille that... I love driving too. It's like, I like a fun, I love a window down, loud music. Like this, this time of year, bro, window down, floor heat on. It doesn't matter what you're driving. You.

have said something out loud that only my father has said to me. My dad, when I was 17 years old, I called him. I was like, hey, I'm on my way home. And he goes, it's cold outside. And I said, yeah. And he goes, roll your windows down. Floor heat on. Trust me, you'll enjoy it. Hell yes. And I fucking rode home and I was like, every time it's cold, floor heat on, windows down. Isn't it the best? I love it. It's the best. God, it gave me chills.

When you can smell somebody having a fire, too, while you're driving through. Oh, that's great. I mean, one of my favorite smells is two of my favorite smells. One's a weird one. But one's rain. Oh, dude. In Florida? Oh, my God. On the pavement. Hot pavement. Thick rain. Dude, I... And then... Sun around the corner. God, I love the smell of rain. I love the smell of rain.

I loved it growing up, just being in a Speedo, like young, like fucking seven years old, being in a Speedo in the street, and you just smell it coming, and you're like, oh, it's raining. Yes. Dude, something about a summer rain. For sure. Write that. Something about Summer Rain is right. In Florida. Summer Rain makes me feel fine. You're the best man of mine. Okay, then what? Ford or GMC? Ford. Okay. That's an interesting choice because, you know, I feel like it's regional. Yeah?

A hundred percent. Is GMC out here? Where are you from from? I'm from Florida. Oh, that's right. You just said that. I'm from Florida. I grew up in Tampa. But like, you go to some places, like I think in Georgia, it's Chevy. Yeah. In Georgia, everyone's driving. That makes sense. Luke Bryan always putting Chevy in his songs. Yeah. And then you go to other places and it's straightforward. Yeah. And I mean, it's funny.

I even take that as far as— I think Tennessee's Ford. I go on a limb and say Tennessee's Ford. I think Tennessee's Ford. I even take that as far as, like, I'm such a Ford guy that— that I won't buy an Escalade because Escalade's the Ford. No, wait. Yeah, right. Escalade's the GMC. Yeah, I guess so. GMC is Escalade because if you get a Yukon Denali, it's identical to that Escalade.

Yeah. A Yukon Denali. Yeah, yeah, totally. It's the same car. So I'm not, I actually, I don't pick a side on purchase. It's like, we only own this in our fleet. Because I just like cool cars. Yeah, I do too. And my only reason we couldn't get escalated is my daughter's feet didn't fit in the back. In the way, way back. Oh, yeah. Because it bumps up. And so they're like, Dad, you got to get the Expedition.

And so they go, we have room in the expedition. A little longer. A little longer, a little more footroom for the kids on the way back. Do you mod every car you ever get? No. Do you ever do tent or anything? When I was a kid, I did tent. And then I was like, I called Tom. And I was like... Probably so. Well, I can't say what he said. I can say what he said. I don't give a fuck. And then if he wants me to edit it out, I will. Okay. I said I got a Mercedes.

and like i'm not real i'm not a car guy so i text my cars to tom tom's a car guy what do you think you know and i texted him my car and he goes it's nice that's a that's a fucking beautiful car classic and i went thanks i go should i get the windows tinted and he goes yeah but don't go too dark or they'll think you're persian and i was like well i'm not gonna do it at all he's like yeah if you're a white guy just

Don't get him tinted at all. Save yourself the trouble. I was telling Tom, this is how little I know about cars. My next door neighbor used to be YG, the rapper. And they were putting his Mercedes. That driveway had some vehicles in it. It did. For sure. It did. And then the same guy, same house, MGK rented it. Amazing. I don't know who's in there now, but the guy's got a fucking sick boat. Really? Oh, yeah. Oh, hell yeah.

So YG's friends were putting YG's Mercedes on the back of a flatbed to go get something done to it. And it was such a badass car. And I said to his buddy, I go, that car is fucking sick. And his buddy goes, you have the exact same car. I said, really? He goes, yeah, you just, we modified it. You just haven't done anything to it, dude. It's all about the mod.

Come on. If I got a pickup truck, I'd fucking pimp that shit out. Hell yeah. Have you seen Rogan's pickup truck? No. Type in Rogan's truck. What, has he got one of those armored truck things? He's got the best pickup. This was the reason I asked the thing. I don't get the whole pickup thing. Is Rogan's pickup truck is the best pickup truck they've ever made, I guess? Yeah, that's it. Go to the picture of Rogan next to it. Yeah, that... no that it's no is you're never gonna be able to find

Searching Joe Rogan's name, you have to be so exactly specific because he's talked about everything there's ever been to talk about. Well, I haven't thought about that. Yeah. The algorithm just like, honestly, you're going to have to do better. It just came out bug out truck, truck from used in ISIS. The truck they used to kill Osama Bin Laden. Yeah. Every truck but his own. A Ford Raptor. It's a Ford Raptor. The Freedom Series. Yes. Yes. You know that car? Yes. So sick. That's fucking wild.

He got, we were driving around in it and it's fast. It's like driving a sports car. You have a truck bed, but you can throw stuff in the back. If you want stuff to fly out while you're going really fast, you can put anything back there. Put a bunch of styrofoam cups. Maybe I'll buy a truck. Dude, please get a truck. I'll tell you right now. If we moved to Nashville, I'm buying a fucking truck. Okay. I'm going to buy a truck. And I'm taking you to the guy to pimp it out. Really? Yes. How?

Small town. How small of a town is Nashville? It is as small as you want it to be, but it can also be as, I mean, it's really one of those cities where like, if you're 25, 30 minutes out, you can really live in the country and like. go into downtown Franklin or go into Leaper's Fork and really never see Big City. But in 25 minutes, you can go to Broadway. Yeah. And like, you can have both worlds. That's what's cool about it. That's wild. You get the country drive on the way to Broadway.

and on the way home. And that's the best. Is it cool? You grew up in Nashville? Yep, born and raised. Is it cool to grow up in a city? I never had this, but I grew up in Tampa, and then I left, and I moved to LA. And I had... In LA, it was cool to have the best.

friends that also kind of ran the city a little bit like not that we ran the city of la's a big city but like my friends were these podcast guys and we like had our own thing going right but it was it was fun that we all lived here but i imagine if you grew up in nashville And you're just a kid in that. You're not like a star in Nashville. You're a kid in Nashville. And then all of a sudden you get into this group of friends.

where you guys all blow up at the same time, and you guys all have this incredible careers, and Nashville's a city run by music, and you're in that industry. What's it feel like to... to have lived your whole life in a city that now, for lack of better words, now you kind of run. Dude, I mean, it's wild. It really is wild. Like, just because I didn't grow up in a musical family. Like, country music was on in the truck.

as well as sports talk radio. But like I was saying, I was always drawn to it and not just hip hop. Like the same year I got the Space Jam soundtrack, I got a banjo. So like I was... taking on bluegrass and flattened Scruggs and all that. I was obsessed with the Grand Ole Opry when I was like 10, 11. A good family friend took me to the Opry backstage. Their husband was a...

So my dad was a coach. I'm sorry, I'm ADD and Stone, but I'm getting it all there. No, no, no, don't worry. So my dad coached. He also coached girls basketball. So one of the girls, Lindsay Hicks, her dad, Russ, played steel guitar in the Opry band and was also in Hee Haw and stuff. Wow. So I knew as a kid, I was like, oh, that's cool.

And he knew that I was into it. So he let me come to the Opry one night. We go back. There's catering back there. I'm like, I'm sitting with everybody. I'm seeing the inside out of the Opry house. And I stand side stage.

And then like, it's like intermission. He takes me out and I stood in the circle and got to look around. This is the middle of the Opry, just like set changeover. And I was like 10 and I was like, oh my God, I want to do this one. Like, this is cool. And the next time I stood in the circle. was 20 years later, almost like to the day around that, like it was winter time, 20 years later, my Grand Ole Opry debut. And it was just like…

Those moments wouldn't have happened if I didn't grow up in Nashville. So like my connection to what the city means to me is like a little deeper than somebody that just moved here because my childhood's weaved. Throughout the city. Yeah, like the dreams that I had as a 10-year-old are manifesting in real time in the place I was dreaming. I knew what it looked like then, and it was obtainable. Yeah.

But it's unreal. It's got to be really unreal. And now who's, who out of your, your, I mean, you're friends with everyone. You write for everyone. Is it, like, is it? I'm dying to dig into this. I really like Post Malone's new album, and I love what Post Malone's doing. But what's it like working with Post Malone? Because he's got the same pedigree as you and Jelly, and hip-hop was this...

the thing, but he's so fucking talented. Well, I don't know how much you've gotten to hang with him or talk, but like, talk about an old school country fan. He loves old school country. Like, we spent as much time listening. to Hank Williams and Merle Haggard and David Allen Coe as we did writing those songs. And like going to the bar, we'd go to Losers and sit on the porch and I'd get the iPad and we'd just DJ the porch.

drink beer and listen to country music for hours. And so writing with him was easy because we spoke shorthand. There was no icebreaker creatively. It was like pick up a guitar and start singing country songs. And it was all hell yeah energy. Really? Yeah, there wasn't like any conversation about direction. It was just like, he did say, he's like, I want it to be live band stuff. I don't want 808s.

And there's a guitar sitting there, so we just pick up a guitar and start writing. Or Charlie would have some tracks, you know, like acoustic parts with like cool vibey drums or whatever. and we'd write in the room and go get on we wrote i had some help in like 45 minutes just because it the track came it felt so good and we were just It ain't like I can make this kind of mess all by myself. That stuff pours out. And so the vibe was just so fun, dude. I had some help. Help!

Wow. Yeah. We had so much fun. What was the first song that you wrote that someone liked it or was a hit? What was that look on their face when they listened to it for the first time or when they got it? I'll give you an example. So the first time I wrote a joke that another comedian complimented me on, I'll never forget that moment. I remember I got off stage and Jim Norton was like, it's a good joke. And I was like, oh, thanks.

And then it's one thing to write a song that everyone falls in love with. But when you're young, your first interaction, I'm sure, was you wrote a song. You're like, yo, you want to maybe this? I know the song. What was it? It's this song called Blacked Out. I'm going to play it. Oh, please. And I didn't think I'd do that, but I'm going to do it. So I wrote this song over a Drake-style instrumental.

My freshman year of college, I was on a baseball scholarship at Freed Hardman and hated being in school altogether. I spent most of my time in my dorm room looking up Drake-style instrumentals and writing raps. And so... I wrote this. It was like, oh, this is my best work. And then I get back to Nashville and put it to Acoustic Guitar and take it in.

take it in for a publishing meeting. The Warren brothers take me in. And this is like the horse I rode in on because I didn't have like a bunch of songs. I just had this one song called Blacked Out and I'm in country music, you know, buildings. And I'm like... fuck, here I go. So I play this and sing this and it got me my first publishing deal. And I've never recorded it, never put it out because it never, you'll see why, but it's like, it was my first moment. This show.

And my weekend is sponsored by Bluetooth. Does Bluetooth work? If you're asking that question, we want you to know that Bluetooth is putting their money where their mouth is by giving you a month. free. Bluetooth is an online service that delivers the same active ingredients as Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra, but at a fraction of the cost and in chewable form. The process.

is super simple. Sign up at Bluetooth.com. Consult with one of their licensed medical providers. And once you're approved, you'll receive your prescription within days. And you will be having fun. within hours of those days. Literally. I mean, you can take it anytime. You can take it anytime. Get ready for the nighttime. That's what I like doing. I personally like taking it around 4 p.m. knowing.

that we're not getting home from the office until seven. I just get excited all day. It's like something to look forward to. Bluetooth wants men. rock hard. They told me that. That's their mission. They won't stop until every man is bricked up like a brick house, till every tent is pitched, till every rod is raised. Discover your options at BlueChew.com. And we've got a special deal for our listeners. Try BlueChew free.

When you use our promo code BurtCast at checkout, just pay $5 in shipping. That's it. That's BlueChew.com, promo code BurtCast, to receive your first month free. Visit BlueChew.com for more details and important safety information. And we thank you, Bluetooth, for sponsoring this podcast. This episode is brought to you by iRestore, the clinically proven game-changing hair growth device that's here.

To help you turn back the clock on hair loss, listen up, fellas. If your hairline has less coverage than your football team's secondary, it's time to take action. What are you waiting for? You know for a fact I've been losing my hair for a long time. I'm always looking for stuff like this. And in a four-month double-blind...

clinical study performed by a board-certified dermatologist. 100% of study participants grew more hair with iRestore's laser and LED technology. You can feel confident you're buying a system with proven results. The iRestore Elite device. is the best at-home laser device in the world. It has more lasers, LEDs, and power output than the competition, ensuring you'll see results. It also has more scalp coverage and is surprisingly comfortable.

You'll even forget that you're wearing it. I often forget I'm wearing it, and I wear it every day. I started wearing it every day two weeks ago. Two weeks ago, I started wearing it every day. I took a before picture, and I will take an after picture, and I'll let you guys know. But I'm telling you right now, and I know I'm just saying.

As I run my fingers through my hair, I feel like everything's getting thicker. Are you ready to get medical grade red light treatment at home to regrow your hair for a limited time only? Our listeners get $600 off their order. when you use code BIRDCAST at iristorlaser.com. That's $600 off your order at iristorlaser.com with promo code BIRDCAST. Hair loss is frustrating. Take it from me. but you don't have to fight it alone. Thanks to iRestore.

Last night I must've been on my damn game, trying to hit the number, didn't need a name. And when I say no, she was getting undressed, she was so damn close with me and mess. 10-2 by 8, drunk by 9, shitty by 10. How the whole time got faded, no doubt, but we made it, no doubt. I found proof that I made one shot like bottles.

Popping through the night And I'm pretty damn sure that I flew last night Sippin' and smokin' too last night Actin' real brand new last night Woke up like, what did we do last night?

Got fucked up last night, like five shot down, five more to go Roll one up, pass the drill, so the night went on They were calling for snow, ladies gather round so they could hear snow flow That's when I blacked out, when I maxed out DJ slinging mad tracks out That's when I tapped out That's when I blacked out When I blacked out That's when I blacked out When I blacked out That's when I blacked out DJs slinging them mad tracks out When I tapped out It's like

Look, whiskey breath, Nike shoes, baseball cap and a schoolboy blues. Fitted jeans and the King of Fresh Crew. Didn't leave the club until the quarter past two and how I made it there. Never will know, but I woke up in a room with the D-bottles and hoes. Couldn't find my keys, couldn't find my clothes. But she wouldn't let me leave, didn't want me to go, so I stayed a little while.

Played a little while, laughed about the night how we both got wild Told her that I loved her smile She laughed and said, I love your style Kiss my neck, kiss my chest Told me hands down last night was the best Show me a picture, remember this? It was me and her, I was holding a fifth She said, right after this, we shared a kiss

To my memory that don't exist So for now I guess I can only wish When I tell her the truth she won't be too pissed When I have to tell her what it is When I tell her I don't remember shit That's when I blacked out That's when I blacked out Look

So today I woke up in L.A. I figured this shit's probably gonna be fucking great Show the birds, got some joints Smoked, made some noise Talked some shit, told some stories Some are cool, some are gory Went on like them one before me I got McElroy, no Rory Hey, bro, you need a truck. Move to Nashville or you're fucked. Gonna have to put some trash in the back of that shit and stash some shit while you acting that bitch.

What the fuck you gonna drive to Zany's? How the fuck you gonna court the ladies? How the fuck you gonna go so crazy? Put it on six inches of lift. them roller spliff hit franklin road don't hit the ditch but if you did bro you'll be fine put that on 35s just drive drive That is an amazing song. It's the reason I like what you do.

You are a songwriter. You are a lyricist. That's why I think you're like Kris Kristofferson. You ever hear that? What's the song he's got about the beer? I gotta have another beer. It's one of my favorite songs. Sunday beer or something. Sunday morning coming down. Yeah, is that it? Where he's like, I forget the fucking song, but it's like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sunday morning coming down. I hear it and I connect with it. I connect with it. I know that. He's talking to my heart.

And when you write music, you talk. And even with that song that I've never heard. It's a goofy song. I love it because it talks to me. Like it makes me feel like me. You know, that's the thing I love about what you do. Thank you. So when you wrote that song, you bring it in, you play it for them. Play it for them. They're like, I don't know what this is, but you'll figure it out, you know? And that, and that was, do you think, okay. So when like, when I watch a comedian,

The only way I can translate this is comedy. When I watch it, a guy like Theo. Yeah. You can disagree with me or agree with me, Theo. I knew Theo was funny before Theo knew he was funny. I believe that. What Theo, and this is like, and I know you're friends with Theo, and I love Theo. Yeah, yeah. I'm good friends with Theo. Love Theo. So I can talk freely about Theo. Before in this world.

And even him knew he was the funniest guy alive. And I will say, Theo Vaughn might be naturally, not written, whatever you want to say, but naturally in our business. The single funniest guy alive. Yes. And when you get a privilege to see it in person, you go, holy shit. We worked on a TV show together on Comedy Central probably 12, 13 years ago.

Before Theo had popped. And before Theo had figured out how to be Theo. He was doing stuff on stage. It's when you're young, you're trying to write. And you're trying to be something. And I witnessed him on one taping of the finale of this show. And mesmerize not only a whole crew and celebrities, but a whole bleachers full of comics, 12, 15 comics. And no one said a fucking word. They were just like.

Holy shit. But I can witness that in the comic. I can tell you who's going to pop. Like Shane Gillis. Yeah, yeah. Before Shane popped, I knew. Of course. I could call Shane and he'd say. This is the moment. Before Shannon figured out what he was doing, we were sitting in a green room in Philly and we're wasted. It's 10 in the morning. It's 10 in the morning. Perfect. We're wasted. We're drinking Fireball.

and he's talking about his ex-girlfriend and uh and he's and i said and he's like kind of like you know and i go what's her name he goes well They call her Tuna. And then he goes, she's a big girl. And I started laughing so hard. And I was like, I know. They call her Tuna. She's a big girl. We got it.

That's when you know that guy is going to... He just made me laugh so cleanly without trying. And I bet that's what... Is that what they saw in you? They're like, listen, I don't know what he's got, but clearly that's... When I watched you do that, I was like, well, that's a guy who not only... He can write poetically, but in really weird pentameters, like really complex pentameters. Yeah, maybe. I guess that's what they saw. Because, I mean, the next three years was me just...

bouncing around rooms, new rooms every day, meeting all the people, trying to find the groove. And like, I didn't have a cut really until three or four years later. So I was really just like... showing up every day and really seeing what happened and then finally my first cut or my first like big moment was with Florida Georgia Line a song called Dig Your Roots and I was like oh we're getting traction I got

I got in that camp and in that world. They kind of took me in because I could rap. T-Hub loved that I could rap. So I would like come freestyle over, you know, country. rap tracks and that was you know kind of that era before it was really popping off and uh eventually i met charlie hansen i had a few a couple number ones first one was with them i love my country and then

Big, big plans. But I'd met Charlie Handsome, and we started cooking. Me and Morgan met in 2017, and Charlie came into the picture in 2018. Second night Charlie was in town, we wrote If I Know Me. And that was like, yo, you got to meet this guy, Morgan. Morgan, you got to meet Charlie. Boom, boom. If I know me, like three weeks later, we wrote more than my hometown with Hardy. And like, and then it was gone. So you met Morgan, Hardy, all those guys. Right around 2017. Really?

Yeah, but me and Morgan actually played state tournament baseball against each other junior and senior year. You're telling me Morgan Whalen can play baseball too? He's a good baseball player. So, you know, I pride myself. on being a good baseball player same dude that's like all i got it's dude i pride myself like anytime we you know i have a summer festival that i do in baseball stadiums

simply to take batting practice. Dude, that was my favorite part of being on tour with him is getting to go take cuts in all these cages. I've made friends with big leaguers. David Ross, the homie. Shout out Rossy, dude. Me and Mookie grew up together. You grew up with Mookie Betts? Since eight, bro. You grew up... with Mookie Betts? Bro, me and Mookie, since Marcus Limbett, we go back since we played Cree Fall Little League Baseball against each other. We played...

school ball against each other every year, and then summer ball, we play on the same team here and there because bouncing around different teams. But Mookie Betts struck out one time his senior year off of me. Really? He struck out one time all year, and it was off of me. I beat him out for, I think, Tennessee State Player of the Year. Not kidding. Holy shit. I had Mookie's number. By the way, I think you're much better than I was. No, dude. Mookie can smoke me now.

And as he smokes, everybody. He has a special place in our family because my girls, both girls were in college. We just dropped it off. Yeah, I saw that. Opening day, Dodger Stadium. The girls say, you know, let's go to a Dodgers game. George hadn't been in L.A. for a while. We go to the Dodgers game, and she's like, you know, I fucking miss home. And then she said, let's keep up with the Dodgers this year.

I was like, really? And she goes, yeah, let's text each other about Dodgers games and let's be a connection we have. I love that. And they're like, who's the best player on our team? And I was like, well, Tani is fucking insane. But I go, the guy. is Mookie Betts. Mookie Betts. And they were like, and I was like, his name's Mookie? I go, fuck yeah. And everyone's like,

We're Mookie Betts fans. Oh, yeah, dude. Dude, I love Mookie so much. I took Ryman, my son, to his first baseball game last night. We went and saw the Dodgers. Sat in Mookie's seats. Thanks, Bree. And... Yeah, Ryman had his Dodger dog and wore a Freddie Freeman shirt.

Got Freddie waved at us, Mookie waved at us. It was, Ryman's like, everybody he saw, he's like, is that Mookie? Is that Mookie? I was like, no, that's me. Freddie came up, he says, is that Mookie? I was like, no, no, he's looking at his shirt. He was like, it's Mookie. I was like, that's Freddie. That's Freddie. Are you Mookie? Have you working on a swing yet? He's got it, man. If he needs anything, he knows I'm here. No, no, no. Oh, rhyming up.

Yeah, no, Ryman's great, too. Ryman's a lefty. He bats lefty, throws righty like me. And he's hitting balls off the tee, but, like, he's... Three and a half. We're going to get there. No rush. Dude, I worked with my daughters. My daughters had the most beautiful swings. Oh, man. I did old. So when I was in high school, I coached kids.

Yeah. On the summer, we'd do a summer camp. Coach Kent had a summer camp. And we'd coach kids. And the Kent brothers were two amazing baseball players who had two sons that were amazing baseball players. Or Coach Kent had a... they're both coach kent to me yeah it was but the dads but um and we did hitting drills for the kids teach kids how to hit that's why in high school i knew hitting drills teach kids how to swing a bat yeah properly

And I did it with my girls. I took them out, put a trash can. That's got to be the best. Put a trash can through and had them throw bats into the trash can on the pitcher's mound to break your wrists, right? Yeah. And so my daughters had the best fucking swings. What a great drill. So my nephew is legit a gangster. He is one of the best players in this little group of kids playing. Sick. How old is he? I don't know.

I don't know. He doesn't wear a watch. Five. Yeah, like seven, six, six. He's good. He's fucking awesome. And so my girls were out there. I was like, girls, we're playing wiffle ball in the backyard. And I go, girls, just. Old school, let's do teams, two on two. And my daughter, Isla, this is how fucking gangster her swing is. She goes, I can't remember if I'm right-handed or left-handed. And I go, just grab the bat and stand.

She grabs the bat left-handed and hits a fucking dinger. And I go, you're right-handed. She went, for real? I go, no, I've watched you in your whole life. Fucking. And they both quit softball. They just quit. That is so funny.

God, that sucks though. Do they like hitting balls anymore still? Do you ever go to a cage with them or anything? No, we used to. It was my favorite. I was obsessed with their swings. I was obsessed with... I'll be that way. My dad... worked with me so much i mean that was like our quality time we spent was either in my yard throwing baseball hitting ball or my mom would just drop me off at the baseball field and i was around high schoolers and my dad coaching baseball like that was

My life was baseball, always. I loved baseball so much. I was telling somebody the other day, I was trying to tell me about it. We were saying how many different people have we been in our lives, you know? And there was baseball. Bert was like, what'd you play?

I was catcher, left field, and third base. So the only reason I got recruited to play college, not the only reason, was the guy I caught went pro. And so... everyone that watched they saw they saw you so like he can catch yeah he's any and i was like did y'all get recruited together no no no no no he got recruited by everyone scholarship offers where'd you go i went to florida state and i was supposed to

I got recruited by Duke and the Citadel. Crazy. And neither places. I remember Duke was like, don't worry. It's a tough school, but we'll get you a tutor. And I was like, hard pass. I'm going to have to pass on that whole thing. I thought I was going to be an athlete. You a Duke, you show up dressed like Bo, dude. You didn't know what you're getting into. You pull in on the general Lee. Oh, this is... I think you got the wrong idea. You slide across the hood of your car. Let's go, Pete!

Yeah, I don't see you at Duke. No, I wasn't. and then they said I could walk on up Florida State and my very first day I walked on and walked right off I was like fuck baseball you walked on and realized it was actually a bunch of running dude it was like you could you know when you like you probably know but

You know when you play with Mookie, the guys I played with, I played with a bunch of guys who went pro. They were just different. Oh, dude. I knew that the first day of college, I was like, I don't really need to do all this.

Do you remember the kids that like baseball really was their lives? And then you're like, they always played like second base. Yes. And they were a little shorter and they hauled ass everywhere. That's Mookie. Mookie, second baseman. I remember like at the beginning of one of those summer ball tournaments, they always do like a home run derby, a skill. contest like a barbecue and uh they did the

race around the bases or whatever. I think Mookie ran it in like 13.5 seconds as like a 14-year-old. And I remember everybody on both teams that were all there were just like, what are we doing? What are we doing here, dude? Mookie was always so good, but you can't predict they're going to be that, you know? Like, he was great at everything. He was always... Brad Radke pitched for the Twins. That's who I caught, right? Brad Radke would play...

He wouldn't play the first few games of our season, of our baseball season. He went pro, mind you, because basketball was still happening, right? Yeah. So Coach Crumbly is like... This is bullshit. Someone get Radke out of basketball practice and tell him he has to hit BP. Yes. So they bring Brad Radke out of basketball practice. He is in high tops, basketball pants and a basketball shirt. And he.

frustrated. He does not want to be there. He's now practicing for two teams at the same time. Grabs the bat. He gets 10 cuts, right? He hits eight home runs and he goes, was that good enough? And you're just like, I've been out here all fucking, I was, I played fall ball. What the fuck? Fall ball. I play football. What am I doing? And then I remember saying to my dad when we were young, I was like, how come no one ever talks about me going pro? He's like.

Buddy, this is just, they're different. Take a look around, kid. Hey, go get me a beer. The fuck are you still talking to me for anyways? God damn it. I'm shocked you're still playing in high school. I paid the coach to get you. He wouldn't accept the money because he needed the numbers. You want the truth? There's the fucking truth. You kept pressing me. You kept pressing me. I didn't want to have to fucking tell you the truth.

You suck ass from the back at baseball. How long has this been going on, Dad? You never were an all-star. I only coached the fucking team so you could be an all-star. Did you notice why three of those kids showed up in wheelchairs? Did you ever think about the walker at the end of the dugout? Oh, my God. I do remember someone saying they didn't make the all-stars.

one year and they were like it's because my dad didn't fucking coach i was like what kind of horse shit is that and i looked at the all-star team and i was like my dad's coaching the all-star team It's like, fuck. It's starting to make sense. So this is called politics, huh? Yeah, dude. Nepo. Oh, God damn it.

I fucking love baseball. I do too. You should go to a game sometime. I would love that. I would fucking love that. I love everything about baseball. I really do. My favorite life experience I've ever had. It was just one of those cool things that was like really cheap was San Francisco. My girls were there. My wife's there. My sister and her boyfriend at the time, husband now, and my parents were having breakfast.

And, you know, we're a big eating family. And my dad goes, where are we eating lunch? At breakfast. And I said. At breakfast is crazy. I love that. I love that. San Francisco. And I was like, I love doing this on the road. It's like, let's go to Giant Stadium and have lunch there. Yes. And we got cheap seats in the nosebleeds overlooking the bay. Oh, man. And we had hot dogs and beers and pretzels. It was, like, fucking great. That's so cool.

What a great call. Going to have lunch at a ball game. I do it. We do it on the road. Oh, I love that. We'll go like, where do you guys want to have lunch? And like, hey, there's a hockey arena. There's a game at four. Love that. It's so fun. We try to go when we can. Our schedules are just funky sometimes with game times. But, yeah, I love going anytime I can on the road, go to a game. And, yeah, it's something about this.

the atmosphere of a baseball stadium is unmatched. Oh, it's so great. Even small, like, small game. summer high school baseball games where it's just like 40 people and they're all, you know, the guy behind home plate keeping his own book and like... If I'm not mistaken, we went to a Duke baseball game.

when we were in uh wherever fucking duke is yeah it was right around the corner from where we were maybe it wasn't duke but we went to a we went to a college college you know we had lunch at a fucking track meet one time Yeah. Whoa. We were like, hey, let's go to a track meet. I've never been to a, like, I ran track, but I was like, I haven't been to a college track meet in a while. Crazy. It was fun as shit. Was it? Oh, yeah.

Food sucked, but... I just remember, like, going to the high school track meets so I could meet up with the people I was going to smoke weed with. Like, we'd meet... Oh, I'm going to the track meet, and then we'd meet at the bleachers and then proceed to drive around for 40 minutes. Sweet. Like, how did you get... This is a weird...

Serious question, but how did you get into drugs with like that family you had? I mean, just like any other high schooler showing up. Just smoking weed? Smoking weed. Well, how old were you the first time you smoked weed? Probably 15. Okay. But I didn't really, like, start smoking weed until I was, like, 17 or 18. I would smoke. Like, I'd get a gram of weed, like, for 20 bucks. And that would last me, like, you know, I'd smoke it out of a Coke can. Yeah.

I didn't know how to roll joints. I didn't get, like, a pipe until, like, my senior year of high school. Really? Yeah. I got introduced to the dugout, and the dugout was my favorite thing in the world until vape pen showed up. Oh, yeah? A dugout in your pocket. Dude. Those vape pens are fucking brilliant. They're great. Oh, I have. They're great. I have so many. The other day I was traveling into Hawaii.

And I looked at how many vape pens I was traveling with because I always just throw one in my bag. And I had nine in my bag. They're not tripping about a vape pen. No, no one is. They're not tripping about flowers. Can I tell you what happened? We were in, I don't know where we were, but I have a Grateful Dead vape pen. It's branded Grateful Dead. That's sick. And it was in my bag, and the woman moved the vape pen five times to find a crystal.

I also travel with crystals. Yeah. Yeah. She moved the bait pen around to get to the crystal. And I was like, they don't care. No, I've had a similar experience with the. An eighth? And they just, to get a water bottle. My dumb ass left a water bottle. But, you know, I have nothing in here. Well, you have a water bottle. So, oh.

Sorry about the water bottle. So you smoke weed at 17. Get into weed at 17. Yeah, I've always liked weed. Yeah. And then booze. Were you ever big in booze? Yeah. Yeah. I've liked booze. I'm not drinking currently. I'm California sober. Okay. But I will always love booze. You think you'll go back to drinking? I don't know. I don't have like an end date on not drinking. Because if I did, I'd probably start now, you know? Yeah.

But there's just like, you know, that fucking cold Coors, like a freezing cold Coors Light bottle is really good. But then it'll turn into like 15 white tee shots for me, you know? And then it's who knows. But weed has been the constant, always. Weed's been a really cool friend of mine. Edibles get me too high, but I'm starting to learn to like edibles with CBD in them because it actually brings my back relief.

Really? Which now I feel like I'm getting old because I'm using edibles for the medicinal reasons, dude. I was at the dispensary the other day. I was like, do you have anything for a tight back? He was like, yeah, man. He was like, actually, the CBD gummies. I was like, am I about to be doing fucking CBD gummies for my back, you fat?

Fucking old shit, dude. And I just want to get anxious, dude. No, I should just want to get anxious. And I'm like, you got anything to help with pain? I watch myself. But I like them. I watch myself. I love the ones that are... they have these great ones that are social they're called socials kiva does and they're so good and you can take a couple because there's like two milligrams but five milligrams cbd

Oh, yeah. So they're really chill. A little energetic. Yeah. And the other day, I walked into the room. I was at the beach with my sister. And my wife's there. Everyone's there. But I just go into the fridge and I grab one and I eat one and I shut the door and my sister goes, so we're eating gummies at 10 a.m.? Yeah, hell yeah. Yeah, we're setting the tone. I'm all for that decision. Do you ever microdose mushrooms?

No, I just got like apparently the bad. I've never microdosed. I have. I would take that back. But I don't microdose. I just do mushrooms. Yeah, right. Okay. The one I ask is, I mean, I love microdosing. That is like a daily thing I could do, like 0.3, 0.5, either like a little gummy or like a pre-ground up capsule, like vitamin capsule. And I love it because it's just like a smile on the day.

More so than you're ever like tripping. I like the smile on the day. I like it when you like my favorite experience on mushrooms was do you remember Rain-X? Rain-X, you'd put it on your windshield and have the water just roll right off. Yes. And Rain-X was really great, except if you were in a rainstorm, then they'd... be like, and we were all mushrooms. Oh, no. I was like, oh, this is wild. Oh, no. I went through a car wash on ketamine, and that was stressful.

Car wash on you. I've never done ketamine. K-spray. It's medically used, and it's like a nasal spray, and it's just euphoric or whatever. You do like three of them, and it's a little more than euphoric. And I was on the phone, and I was like, ah, just impulsively was like, I'm going to go through the car wash. And I decided to pull into the car wash. Are you fucked up on ketamine?

Only experience I have with ketamine. You're functional. It's not like it takes you out of the race. It's just like... you're really high for a second. And I was like, I'm going to go through the car wash. This is a good place to be. I'm off the road for a second. Let the car wash happen. And dude, it was the scariest thing of all time. Cause I'm like trying to line my wheels up with the thing. And I'm like holding the phone.

And these massive fucking things are coming in. The dude's telling me to get over. I'm like, I'm trying to get over. I don't want to. Dude, it was so stressful for like a minute and a half. But not doing that again. Weed, dude. Weed and mushrooms. My next album is Car Wash on Ketamine. Ketamine Car Wash. Ketamine Car Wash. Hey, guys, we're Ketamine Car Wash. Thank you guys so much. That is a great band name. Thank you so much.

through the car wash here on ketamine and I can't see anything I might die or I might live is it a nightmare or just a dream and if I die I'll be high on ketamine. I won't be high on ketamine when I die, but we're car wash ketamine too. Wrecked this thing into the brushers. Mom's going to be so mad. I guess I'll call dad. Will I cut again tonight or will I wait until tomorrow? But my car's so full of sorrow, I had to dream the catamane. I can't wait for tomorrow.

You have to be frustrating to so many artists who are like, how can you do this? I'm frustrating to everybody that has to be around me. Hey, we're talking here. Have you seen Walk Hard? Oh, yeah. It's like obviously one of the best movies ever, right? Of course you have. Dude, it's so real when...

When she's like, don't you dare write a song right now, Dewey Cox. And he's like, but it's a good title. It's like, that is me every day. Like any real conversation I'm having with Delaney or anything, she could say something. Then I get that look. She's like, not now. But it's really good, though. You know what I do? Dude. This is what I do, right? So my daughters, I think you already know it, Christine. My daughters call me out on this, but I'll do this. We'll be talking and I'll go.

And George will go, are you writing a joke right now? And I'll be like, oh, yeah. And I just, in the middle of anything, I'll talk to myself and I'll mouth it. And then everyone will stop and they'll look at me and I'll go, what? And they're like, you're writing a joke, aren't you? And I go, yeah, I can't help it. Yeah, sorry. I'll mouth it. I'll mouth it. I'll start doing the bit. Do you remember it that way? If you mouth it, you have a better job.

better remember it or like is that real time so you think of a joke and you're just doing it out loud i have to i'm i am i think i'm crazy like i'm really actually think of like if The world wasn't as welcoming as it is today. with like allowing everyone to be neurodivergent and have anxiety and ocd like if i was in fucking 1880 and i was on a ship with going to find the northwest passage and you knew me as a sailor you'd be like that guy's out of his fucking mind he's crazy

They would just qualify me as crazy. And so I talk to myself a lot. In getting ready for this interview, I was talking to you in this interview to myself. And that's how I do it. That's fine. Yeah. But it's wild to live with. And it's wild to be a child of that father. Like, I'm so bad that if you, if I make you a sandwich and I give it to you and you take a bite, I'll bite with you. I'll go. That's kind of hot. That's kind of hot. It's like, dude, you're like a food cuck. That's crazy.

You put a chair. You got to get a table for two, but you got to sit over in the corner. call my daughters right now. Oh, that's the fucking, I'm a food cock. I'm a food cock. Please get Leanne up here. Please get Leanne up here. It is so bad. They mock me when I do it. I'll give them a sandwich and George will, if she sees me doing it, she'll slow down and watch me slow down and I'll go. It's so bad. It's so bad. But I'm a food cock. I'm a food cock.

Oh, I wish I had thought about that. It's a great bit. It's a great bit. You can have it. You can have it. We co-wrote it. I'm a food cuck. That is so fucking funny. I'd hope my daughters don't know what a cuck is. But I am absolutely a food cuck. Would you rather them hope they know what it is or you have to explain it to them when they don't? I would.

I would love to tell him what it is and then go, wait, what's a cuck? And I go, oh, this is great. Yeah. It's a guy that likes to watch people fuck his wife. And they're like, wait, there's, I would love. And then for them to hear that and go, that's wild. Wait, you are a food cuck. You totally are. That's exactly. what you are yeah i'm uh yeah but i think i'm quantifiably crazy because i like i talk to myself if i walk on a treadmill if i walk at like a 3.5 i can really um

I might get really creative. Like walking around New York is like my favorite way to write jokes. Oh, cool. Like on the move. Yeah, just walking. I guess I pace in a room. Like if we were writing, I'd probably be up pace and moving around. People are like, well, you can sit here. No, no, no. Let me walk around. Yeah.

Yeah, I like moving. But getting a good pump is like on the treadmill. I've never thought about that. I've never thought about getting on a treadmill. But you did lose weight, though. I did lose weight. How did you lose weight? Not drinking.

and exercising, but not treadmills. What kind of exercise? You know what I was going to do? It's like weights and like circuits, body weight, and I got a trainer. I was going to invite you to come work out with me this morning because I was like, I don't know if there's something about you guys that I feel like I've known you guys forever.

because i've been following you guys forever and i've been like i like and i and so like i was gonna hit you up and go hey we should come over to my house and work out and then i was like wait we should probably just Maybe we should get to know each other first. As opposed to come over to my house and see if we both have parties. Let me make you a sandwich. Please.

Just one? Yeah, just one. Just one. No, slower. Slower. Swallow it. Chew a little longer. It's so bad that not only is it happening with food. When I was a kid, there was a movie called Name of the Rose. name of the rose and there's a it's about priests or whatever but one priest fucks a nun and they're kissing on the screen i must have been 10 years old they're kissing

And I start air kissing. And I'm sitting next to my dad. He goes, the fuck are you doing? And I'm like, huh? I didn't even know I was doing it. I'm like. The priest and the nun. Dude, if I watch blowjob porn, I'll start swallowing naturally. I'll just start going like, hey, man, why is he drooling a lot? Jesus Christ. It's a lot of upkeep here. I got to try ketamine.

I mean, yeah, don't do it. Don't get it. Just, yeah, get it. It's a disassociate. It's good with anxiety and OCD. Correct. Yeah, it's awesome. And doctors can prescribe it. It's big in Nashville. Yeah. Only reason I know that. I watched Shane Gillis go into a K-hole. I hope he's told this story before, if he hasn't. If he hasn't, Shane Gillis did ketamine. And he called us and he goes, my legs aren't working.

Can you get me? We're like, what? And we sat in the lobby of a hotel with him for like 30 minutes and watched him like literally go in and out. Big, biggest Shane Gillis smile on his face the whole time. Like this. I still can't walk. Still can't walk. Do you want a beer? I'll take a beer. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I didn't go into a K-hole in the car wash. How fun is living in Nashville? It's awesome. Dude, I mean...

It wasn't the most it city growing up, you know, it was like Broadway existed, Predators games, Titans games, all that shit. But in the last eight years, 10 years. especially the last three years. Last three years? The last three years, now it's insane. Like, I don't go to Broadway much. It's just like, it's like, I get claustrophobic if it's like around too much. But, so many great restaurants, like...

so many great bands if you do go to Broadway. And even Fifth and Broadway now is a good reason to go to Broadway for good restaurants and good little shopping. And you can still get so close you can smell it and hear all the bands and stuff. And then... Outskirts, dude. It's all about the outskirts. You get out there and there's great little mom and pop restaurants. There's a place. Have you been to Loveless Cafe? No.

Gotta go to Loveless Cafe. It's been there for forever. It's like this— They make homemade biscuits. And like, it's country cooking, dude. Like, red-eyed gravy. Fucking grape fried chicken. Like, you just got to go order too much and be willing to let some go because you're going to want to try so much. Oh, that's how I do it. I always order two meals. Yeah, over order. Try whatever. If they both look good, get them both.

Delaney rolls her eyes at me all the time. She's like, because she'll count. It's like me, her, and Ryman. And there's four meals that have been ordered. And she's like, did you mean to do that? I'm like, yeah, I want to try it. I want to see if I'll eat half of both of them. It's one meal. I've never heard someone say this. Where the fuck is my wife? For real, where the fuck is my wife? Can you get her out of the goddamn meeting?

This is so fucking, yeah, let's take our fucking shirts off. Fuck this shirt. Stupid ass shirt. Who's Leanne in a meeting with? This is so much more important. Oh, yeah, never mind. That's actually pretty important. Leave her there. Yeah, I've always ordered two meals. You know what I do is I order the healthy one and the one I want. So, like, I'll go, okay.

Last night, Leanne goes, I go, what are you looking at? She goes, I'm looking at the whitefish. And I said, what else? She goes, I really want the sea bass, but I think the whitefish is better for me. I said, cool. She goes, what are you going to have? And I said, I'll have the steak and the sea bass.

I think she'll have the whitefish. And she was like, what are you doing? And I was like, well, I want to try them all too. Yeah. And I was like, yeah. That's why I call my special razzle dazzle. I'll go to McDonald's and give them 200 bucks and go razzle dazzle me. I want you to fill up what you think $200. $200 at McDonald's? And we'd take it to the tour bus, and we would fuck it up. Bro, that's so much McDonald's.

That's like going to Craig's and giving them $2 million. Dude. Yo, $200 at McDonald's. My favorite thing is when I do it with other people and they don't know that I do it. We were on a ski trip. It was me. Ari, Mark Normand, Sean Patton. It was Steve Renazzini and someone else. And there was a Del Taco on the way back to our... our house and i go pull over the del taco and they're like

And we go up to the thing and everyone's like, uh, let me see. I think I'm going to get, I go, I'll take care of this. I do hate that part of, yeah. So I understand I'm going to order everything. You're going to be happy. I said, Hey brother, I got 200 bucks. Razzle dazzle me. He's like, what? I go, make it fucking rain.

200 bucks or whatever. You just fill up the shit with 200 bucks. And these, it's all comics and we're all fucking high as shit. And they're laughing hysterically. And we lived off that for three days. Oh yeah, dude. Oh my God. How many bags comes out with that much money? Oh, it was probably seven bags. Packed to the brim. I don't think I've ever gone to a Crystal's and ordered a burger.

I get the suitcase every time. Fuck yeah, dude. They got suitcases. Suitcases. So that's just like the big box. It's got probably a dozen. Like it's 12 facts. No, I think it's 25. Pull up a suitcase. Crystal suitcases. And by the way, how many of those were you put down? Oh, I'll put down 25.

I almost did it. You know, we were taking Isla to college and we're in the car and I was like, I was hungry. We got a Target. George is in the car. Leanne's in the car. We're all in the car. And I go, I want to get, what? Crystal. You've never heard of crystals? But it's spelled with a K. Yeah. That might help. You've never been to Crystal? You're probably better for it. Yeah, yeah. And look at us.

We are crystal. I think it's 25 burgers. This is already taking too long. Don't worry about it. Do you have painful shit? No. Here's the part I didn't tell you. I never just get one suitcase because I'm not going to carry one suitcase. I do farmer carries and I get two suitcases. And if you're on a tour bus, I'll get two suitcases of crystals. And just keep them around for the week. They're always good. They don't go bad. You're right, though.

We should tour together, too. We should do it between our tour buses, the amount of weed and fast food that would go down, dude. Oh, my gosh. We went out with Jelly for Fully Loaded this year. Yeah. And the very first night, I think he had just gotten deputized. Yeah, in Michigan or whatever. And we've smoked so much weed that I got in the bus with my wife and I asked her if she was a hologram.

And she said, she said, quote unquote, we can't tour with Jelly much longer. She's like, you need to slow down. You get so excited around Jelly. You got to slow the fuck down. Are you a hologram dude? Pick up lines after hanging with Shelly Roll. But you ever have someone on the tour bus that shouldn't be there and then you get high and you look at them and you're like, normally it's not you. You're not here.

She was in my tour bus, and I was like, you're never in my tour bus. I was like, wait, are you real? Are you real? Is this a real thing? This show is sponsored by Chubbies. Summer is dead. Sorry if that sounded harsh, but it's true. Fall is upon us and the weather's getting crisper and chillier and your wardrobe needs to catch up. Luckily.

The sponsor of this ad read is here to save the day. Chubbies. Yes, Chubbies. Home of the ultra cozy comfort clothes that keep you feeling warm and looking better as the weather gets progressively worse and worse. From their flannel line shorts to their... warm pullover to their cozy quarter zip ups. Chubbies has all the fall ready threads.

for that outdoor football game, pumpkin patch adventure, or late night weekend bonfires. Let me tell you something. Those lined shorts are freaking awesome. They are so comfortable. Dude, I... I've been a fan of Chubby's for a long time, but I love stepping up. I love when the weather changes. I love the new clothes. And Chubby's has it locked. And would you look at that? Folks, for a limited time, our friends at Chubby's are giving our listeners 20% off.

with the promo code BirdCast20 at checkout at chubbyshorts.com. That's 20% off your order. with promo code BERTCAST20. Support our show and tell them we sent you this fall. Make the most of every moment with Chubby. Shop now and fall into comfort one stylish piece at a time. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Kids are always learning and growing.

But as adults, sometimes we lose that curiosity. It's funny because we love watching it in our children, but then we don't do it for ourselves sometimes. What's something you'd like to learn? Think about it. Gardening, a new language, maybe how to beat your best friend in basketball.

therapy can help you reconnect with that sense of wonder because your back-to-school era can come at any age. Leanne and I are going through this right now. We are. We're by ourselves. No girls in the house. And I'm telling you, man. I would be losing my mind if it wasn't for therapy. And therapy has helped me redirect what I want to do. You know what Leanne and I are doing? I know this sounds weird.

But we're going out every night. We're going out. We're having dinner. We're doing fun stuff. And that's not something we would have come up with on our own. We both talked about it in therapy. And we're like, we need to busy ourselves. We need to get out there. We need to try new things. We're taking dance lessons together.

How fun is that? You know, Leanne wants to take a mixology class together. She wants to learn how to make fancy cocktails. If you're thinking about starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible. and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapists at any time for no additional charge.

Rediscover your curiosity with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash Burt today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Burt. When 2007, I know this is like the most fucked up interview. Dude, no, this is the best. Thank you for having me. No, you're... Thank you for having me. I feel like, like I said, I feel like I know all you guys. I feel like I know you guys. Yeah. Because I've seen you guys.

It's like, you know, and it's like, I am good friends with Jelly, so I do kind of know you guys. Yeah, yeah. When everyone starts popping, who's the first person to make a million dollars out of your group of friends? Was it Morgan? Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Who's the first person to like? It was either Morgan or Hardy. Because Hardy was probably making songwriting money. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You know, so it could have been Hardy to see the first actual make a million dollars.

It could have been. At what point did you guys like go like, do you ever have like a dinner where you're like, can you believe this is happening to us? Man, you know, the first time we actually got to all three be together and revel was just this. Past year, we did a writer's retreat. We went out to a lake, and just me, Hardy Morgan, and Charlie stayed at Craig Wiseman's lake house. And we were sitting there, and we realized we hadn't wrote a song together.

seven years something like that six years and like we couldn't believe that we like this was the first time we were actually getting a hand we've toured together and done shows but you know how that shit is yeah it's not like we're just sitting around like hanging

And we got to do that. And it was wild because the last time we did that, you know, I wasn't even touring yet. I was writing songs for Florida Georgia Line. Hardy and Morgan were both opening for Florida Georgia Line. Like I was out on the road writing on. See, like Brian and Tyler took out a bus for songwriters. So I'd go out on that right when I was like in that, yeah, 2017 era. And I'd be out there writing songs on the road and Hardy and Morgan would be opening.

So we'd all be mucking around together and writing songs and having a blast down the road on the FGL tour. So I'd been on the road the whole time and finally, and then I was opening. For Morgan, me and Hardy are opening for Morgan. And it's like the cycle of over the past eight years has been insane. It just looked, it looked really fun from the outside. A blast. It was, it was really fun. I want to say the first person I met was Hardy.

Yeah, probably so. Yeah, but I knew him because I just liked Morgan. I just liked who he was. Yes. I just thought he was, I think, I want to say like Theo was friends with Morgan like before, like knew him way before. Yep. And so, but it's just been, it's like, you know, people always ask like, what's it like?

what was your group, your Sober October group or your group of comics in LA like? And I was like, oh, this is the best time of our lives. When we do shows together and no one cared about money and you all go and do, we had this one night where we did the End of the World podcast and it was... the night of the election, probably 2000. I remember that 17. Yep. And it was me, Bill Burr, Joe Rogan, Doug Stanhope. And they were like, and I remember going up going like,

This is like, I'm sitting with Mount Rushmore. Yeah. Yeah, it's insane. Yeah. I remember saying to Joe, like, I don't need to. I remember Joe calling me and going, you know, what's his name wants to be on the show? Fuck that guy. And I was like. So he's a really big comic. And he was like, yeah, but he's not us. And I went, oh, I'm us? Damn. Like, it's a cool feeling. How cool is that? To be us. Man. Yeah, looking across side to side, I mean, it is.

Those are my friends, you know, like before any fame was happening. But now to see it at the level it is and like Morgan Hardy being household names is nuts. And, you know. it's easy to remember what it was like before this because it really wasn't that long ago but it feels like we've been working on it for forever you know and like um speaking of being like just being there

Being part of it is like one of those nights during the post sessions, bro. Just sitting around in a room like this. And I look up and it's me, Luke Combs, Jack White, Eddie Vedder. If I didn't say Post, Post was there, Charlie. And then just like an hour or so later, Hardy came through and it was like...

Just the personalities you're looking around. He's like, oh my God. I mean, I'm on this couch with these guys right now. And we're actually making the song that Eddie Vedder and Jack White are just here to listen to. Just to see what's going on. It's like...

Those moments are insane. When I'm sitting at a table last night at Dodger Stadium, it's just me and Brad Paisley freaking talking as friends. He's talking to Ryman because it's Ryman's first game and Ryman doesn't have a clue. He's like, hey. Brad, like he didn't know anything. And it's like, I'm still a fan of all of this, you know? And I hope to never lose that because it's still so, so cool. Yeah, we're all, I know these people, we're all friends, but like.

i'm a fan of what they do too oh yeah i get i can't i i was i'll tell you a secret okay like i don't i don't think i've told this right maybe i have i don't know but like i don't tell this often i got a call one night uh from chapelle and was in dayton he's like yeah he's like are you partying and i was like yeah he's like come over and i was like cool so we

it's funny you say that about like brad paisley i feel that about chapelle yeah like i just i'm sitting there going like this is cool but i'm also i'm also his contemporary maybe not or his peer i'm maybe not contemporary but his peer Right. We work in the same profession. Right. And it's crazy how that, when that wall's down, it's like, cause you, you will never not be a fan of these, their icons. And I know so much about Dave Chappelle. I've so, he, he meant, he means.

So much to me, so many things he said have resonated with me that I'll never forget and I'll never let go. I remember he said that one of the first things, it was just a casual thing. He said, do you remember going to first grade? And you felt like, did these kids grow up together? How do they all know each other? And I remember hearing that going, I always felt like that. That's who I am. So then I connected with him as a guy. And it's like.

But in this moment, we're hanging out, and then I was like, I was like, yo, I got to, I said to him, I was like, I got to stop real quick. Like, bro. I'm with the greatest comedian that ever lived. I go, I gotta, we gotta talk shop. Yeah. Like, tell me, can I get some secrets? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, I'm not that good, Dave. Like, I go, I'm about to shoot a special and I go, I need.

Tell me, can I break down? I go, I told him, I said, I'm wasting my time if I don't ask you how you do it. Yeah, yeah. And he was like, I love this shit. And all of a sudden, I'm sitting with like the best to ever do it maybe. Yeah. And we're talking about how to do a special. And man. It's like the greatest, but I never forget, like, I'm on this couch too. That feeling. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. That'll never get old. Yeah. I hope it never gets old. It won't ever get old. I don't think it'll get old.

So who was your favorite comedian? I mean, Kinison was like a huge influence on me. I just think Kinison was fucking amazing. Dave Attell is my favorite comedian. Dave Chappelle. Chris Rock's Bring the Pain is the reason I'm doing comedy. I saw that and I went, that's different. Yeah. And that's what I like. Yeah. And I was like, I'm getting into comedy because of that one special. How old are you? I was in college.

I must've been, I mean, so it was either 2021 or younger. Oh, I didn't graduate until I was 25. Oh yeah. Well, I dropped out. I mean, I have no, I don't know how old people are at all, dude. So. I was living in Indian Village. I know that. I know where I watched it. I know where I was. So I was probably 24, 23, 24, 25. And that just, I was like, I was in Tallahassee and I was like, this is the greatest.

I've never had that feeling about any other stand-up special I've ever seen. There's some great ones, but that one special, top to bottom, was so perfect. Yeah. What a great one. What songs have you heard where you go... Oh, that's a good lyric. God, I wish I'd thought of that. Like, what's a song you heard recently? Like, where you go, ooh, that's good. Hip-hop, anything. Can I go back, though? Old school? Yeah.

Angel flying too close to the ground. Willie Nelson. Angel flying too. Oh, this is a fun game. Oh, yeah. Let's go through our favorite lyrics. Man. Okay. If you had not had fallen, I would not have found you. Angel flying too close to the ground. I patched up your broken wing. Hung around a while. I'd rather see you up. Hold on, let me see. One second. May I? Please. The shirtless is going crazy right now. If you would not have found me I would not have found you

Angel flying too close to the ground. And I patched up your broken wings. and hung around a while trying to keep your spirits up and your fever down I knew someday you'd fly away. is the greatest healer to be found so leave me if you need to And I will still remember Angel flying too close to the ground So leave me if you need to I will still remember Angel flying too close

To the ground. So, that song is probably my favorite song. Willie Nelson. I've done a lot of gay shit. But two shirtless men. And you singing that to me? Yeah, dude. That might be the gaydest thing I've ever done. Yeah. Pretty sick. Clip that out and have no preface to it. Just a wide shot the whole time. And me going like this. I'm like this. And I go, is he singing it to me? that is that is fucking that song that's that's a beautiful fucking song so good Willie's the best man

There's a song. For me, a great lyric is when I feel like I've done it. When I've done it. And there's a song in, what was Paul McCartney's Band on the Run? Oh. When band on the run, when it changes tempo, I wish I knew. Let me just. Yeah, I mean. Is it wings? Is it wings? And he says when our bellies burst through the sun. Hang on. Pull up. By the way, I got pretty fucking high. Me too. How long have we been here? Six hours? Hour 30. We'll wrap it up. No, we don't have to wrap anything.

Sit here. She's the person that's about to say. Twins. Has someone been smoking pot in here? No, I did walk in like this, though. It wasn't me. It certainly wasn't me. Can I tell you the funniest thing that's ever been said to me, Leanne? Yes. Yes. Which is really saying something. I hope you're going to enjoy this as much as I enjoyed it. Okay. And I hope the girls get it.

I was telling him how I, when I write jokes, I'll do impression of me writing jokes at a dinner table. Okay, do impression of me giving you a sandwich to eat. Oh, when I'm eating the sandwich? He goes. We call it ghost biting. Do you know what he called it? What? He goes, you're a food cuck. that's really good that's really good that's really good do you write music like this

No, we were talking about the creative process. We were talking about the creative process. I figured. He would be in a fight with his wife and then his wife goes, you're not writing a song about this. He's like, oh yeah. Oh, same thing. It's just like, yeah, anything is liable to be used. Against you in the court of songwriting. Can I tell you the best one ever? Same. You already know what I'm going to say. I do. I know exactly what you're going to say. One time.

Leanne farted during oral sex. Accidentally. Not on purpose. Accidentally. And then... Wait, who was receiving? I was giving her oral sex. I was in the fucking hole. He took it on the chin. Either one's funny. He took it on the chin. It's pretty bad. It was a mistake. It was an accident. I had two babies. She started crying, and I go, what are you crying about? She goes,

you're going to talk about this on stage. I went, you're fucking right. You're definitely right. He did. And he did. Oh, that's so funny. Yeah. Everything that happens is, if it's funny, it's game. It's game. We're talking, let's talk old school country. I would love to. So have you ever listened much to Ernest? Not much. No, sorry. Don't be sorry. Can I tell you who he reminds me of? And I think I'm accurate in saying this. Chris Christopherson.

Yeah, it's really. I'll take that compliment. You are such a singer. Great singer-songwriter. Chris Christopherson. But he is too. And I know that you are only because I know your resume, but not from listening to your music. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry you have to see me like this today. I see this like this every day.

So, same, same. You guys are twins. You just have more tattoos. You look like Mitchell Tenpenny sometimes, though. Who? You and Mitchell Tenpenny look a little bit alike. Who's Mitchell Tenpenny? Country singer? Pull him up. You've met Mitchell.

Oh, interesting. Wait, I know Mitchell. I know Mitchell Timpenny. Yeah, you were just on his bus like… Yeah. Two weeks ago. Yeah, I know him. So then maybe you know him if you were on his bus. Fuck! God damn it, I'm so bad with names. You can just cut that. You know how bad I am in names? Do you know what I called you for the longest time? Aaron. Ernst. Dude. That's awesome. I didn't see that. Ernst is hilarious. It's because you had an album named Earn. Yeah, I did.

And I'm dyslexic. And I saw your thing and I was like, Ernst is a cool fucking name. I mean, for the longest time. And I remember talking to Jelly about you and he was confused with who I was talking about. Oh, that's hilarious. And he was like, oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, man. But I also have a good friend named Brett Ernst. Yep. I have a good friend named Brett Ernst. So I read it. I just misread it. Old school singer-songwriters. Old school.

Can I tell you who I think you like, but I know I like, and I almost love, is David Allen Coe. Dude, I love David Allen Coe. We cover... You never even call me by my name. I heard... We sing that in soundcheck every day. For real? Yeah. What are the chords to it so I can start playing it? It's like... Well, it was all... I wonder if it's an E. It's cheap. This is all I can do. Keep from crying. Keep from crying.

Sometimes it seems so useless to remain You don't have to call me darling you never even call me by my name i love it he goes well you don't have to call me Waylon Jennings, you know, and you don't have to call me Charlie. To call me Merle Haggard anymore Even though I'm on your fighting side As you will, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me. And I never minded standing in the... darling darling you never even called me by my name i heard the original of that

The original, the guy that wrote it. Yeah. What was his name? Randy or something. Steve Goodman. Steve Goodman. A friend of mine, Steve Goodman, wrote that song. He said, I wrote the perfect country western song. Well, I listened to Steve Goodman's version. It sounds totally different than David Allen Coe's. I'll bet. David Allen Coe's a pimp, dude. If you go back and just listen to albums, which I've literally just recently...

been in like a David Allen Coe world. Just his songwriting, Would You Lay With Me, is one of the most beautiful, heavy lyrics. Would you lay with me in a field of stone? Would you lay with me if my needs were... It's like, dude, would you die with me? Are you down to die? And for such a rough around the edges guy, his songwriting is so...

He always writes those songs like, don't tell me lies or hypnotize me with your eyes while saying that you need me. He's always like, his soft spot is like, if I love you, please don't hurt me. Yeah. And I think that's so sweet for such a rough guy. I love that he writes that side. That's sick. When we were in our fraternity my freshman year, on Sundays you had to clean the house.

Everyone came in to clean the house, the whole pledge class. And they said, there was a brother who said, we only clean the house to David Allen Co. So they put on David Allen Co. on all the speakers of the house. And I remember being like, I'm not really into country. And all of a sudden, I was like, I'm really into country. I'm like, I'm really into David Allen Coe. But I think a lot of country music, I didn't really get Dwight Yoakam.

And then Leanne is obsessed with Dwight Yoko. Yeah, I'm a big Dwight. Where are you from? Georgia. Okay. Georgia. I'm a huge. Yeah, I am right. I should have just said, say certain states and I'll guess which one you're from. You know, right? It's so true. Yeah, I'm a huge Dwight Yoakam fan. I have been a Dwight fan since like 1988. Yeah. Like hardcore, listen to every album, front to back. Yep. I love his acoustic. Bakersfield sound is...

Just great. I'm a Merle Haggard freak. I love Merle Haggard so much. I got That's the Way Love Goes tattooed on me. Like, I love Merle Haggard. Jones. Oh yeah. Just like country music history to me is so cool. Like I love, I love like one of the coolest parts of driving down music row is that all of the houses that are now publishing houses, like it all looks.

Other than now they're throwing high-rises in the mix. But for the most part, an old house is exactly what Music Row looked like when Jones was driving his Cadillac down that, you know, and like... I'll be driving a Cadillac down that road and looking at these houses. It's like, this is sick. These are the roads they were driving. Like, there's a building across the street from Big Loud where my office is. And it's like, still got the Waylon.

logo on the side of the building because Waylon owned that building in the 80s and it's like there's like so much of the fingerprint of the shit we're talking about all still throughout the throughout the city and it's like

And that's one of my favorite parts of living in Nashville is like, this is what it looked. I'm such one of those guys. This is what it looked like when, like when you're out in the field in the middle of, you know, rural Alabama, when you're driving through those towns on the way down to 30A.

And like South Alabama. And it's like so. Like it looks like Civil War-esque. And the fog is sitting on the grass. It's like this is what it would have looked like. Yeah. I love that. And Nashville still has some of that. And I don't want to lose it. I think Nashville is such a sexy city. Yeah. She went there. It wasn't your first time, right? Yes. My first time in April. Oh, yeah.

We didn't travel much growing up. I stayed in Georgia or Alabama. You're so close. Did you go to Braves games? Not a whole lot. We were like an hour drive. They didn't have any money. Okay. Not a whole lot. No. I was trying to explain that to my trainer today. He was like, why does your wife work so hard? I was like, I don't know if this is the right thing to say, but I think sometimes with people that don't have money and maybe don't see a way out of it, they go, well, the only thing I know.

is that if I work as hard as I fucking can, then at least I can put my head down on the pillow and wake up knowing I did my best. Well, it's a very blue-collar way of living. My whole family is blue-collar. It's super blue-collar, yeah. Same. My whole family is too. Yeah, you sun up, sun down, big farm family. It's like one of those really hard-working people where it's just...

Even if she doesn't have work to do, she'll just start folding clothes that are already folded. There's always, always work to do. There's never not work to do. Yeah. Always. No downtime. No downtime. Why? Sleep when you're dead. Yeah, that's right. Right? Who's your favorite person to get song ideas from? Like that doesn't know you're getting them from them. Like someone to hang out with where you're like, like for real, I mean, it's very clear that I made, I made.

A lot of money off my daughter, Isla. Yeah. That kid was a walking joke machine without knowing it, without any idea that she was doing it. She just, everything she did, the way she did it. It's own bit. She's super unique. Everything. Yeah, that's awesome. But at one point, she found out. And she was like, yo, he's talking about my period.

And Leigh Ann's like, oh, you didn't know this is what your dad did? She kind of started flying under her right arm. Yeah. But is there someone you're around where you go, God damn it, my uncle. You know, the... The honest answer to that would be the community of songs. It's not just one person. Being on tour is great because my band is full of creative writers.

anybody is liable to say anything at any time that is like oh that's a like talking to somebody about my pedal steel player Chandler who is now in post band because he met through all that and he's 21 and He's got a whole world ahead of him, but it's been like a breakup, him going off into post-band because I love him. And we were talking and somebody was like, you know, but Chandler's going to have to know the world without you in it. And I was like, oh.

I got to write the world without you in it. And so we went and wrote that song immediately. It's like old school country. And like, so it's not just one person, but like those moments are how. They freeze frame. Sitting at the bar at Loser is anything somebody's liable to say. You know, like, If I Know Me happened because we were sitting downstairs in Joey Moyes' studio. I was, like, playing Xbox. We're drinking beer. It's me, Charlie, and Morgan.

morgan goes up to the top this is like again 2017 he goes to the tap pours a beer he's like you want one or you want you want another one i was like if i know me and he was like let's write that and so we go across the hall and write that and like It's so conversational when you can freeze frame those moments. It seems like you guys all could have also been comedians. We like to think we are in our off time. But see, we, because we're not...

Our humor can only get so far. Musicians are held to a different level of humor levels, I feel like. We're comedians. We're comedians. We can say anything in the name of comedy, just like hip hop. It's like you can, it's comedy and it should always be that way. And hell yes. Thanks to like y'all right now, all the boundaries are like, it's comedy and it's free reigns again. And we love it.

As listeners and fans of comedy, we love it. So, but like, so yeah, we're all funny, but it's like, I can't be as funny as I think I might be when it's just like, you know. You're pretty funny. You're definitely funnier than a lot of the comedians I've had on this podcast. There's a couple going. I think he's talking about me. That's hilarious. Okay, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, cool. Dude, I agree. Everybody I'm around, I think you're funny. I love being around funny people. My whole crew, my tour manager's funny. The merch guy's funny. We all just sit around and laugh together. We're... But don't you think Southern people are inherently funny? So, and I think, yeah, with, yeah. And the more, the more country, the funnier. Exactly. I think the accent really adds to the whole, yeah. And the country-isms.

The deeper South, the countryisms get insane. And they love a turn of a phrase in a different way than someone who's not Southern does. I think even just how you say something is very specific in the South and it's just inherently kind of... Funny. Maybe not funny, but clever. Yeah, yeah. Or creative. You ready for this? Yeah. I want to say this to two Southern people. I think it's a lack of...

I'm trying to think of the right way to say this. It's a lack of knowledge, meaning in New York, you would use the word epiphanous as opposed to saying, well, God knows everything. In the South, no one's sitting there with a thesaurus. What you have to do is you have to be clever with your words to get across the $20 word that they're saying in New York City. Speaking analogies at all times. Yeah. There's a more poetic.

way to say yeah as opposed to sound like you're reading a textbook in the south they let you feel the word i think that's why country music's so good and it's so different and really taking over right now because i think you're telling stories to people's heart I've never... You're not... Well, country music is a storytelling...

Genre. I mean, pop music doesn't really tell a story per se. Some pop songs do. But as a genre, country music, almost all country songs are a story. Yeah. Right? They're not like a catchy phrase, a catchy phrase. It's really your...

You're talking about something. It's a story. Yes. That's why I love country music too, is because of the story. Because that's why I married a storyteller. Yes. Our whole conversation started with... the similarities between hip hop and country and because hip hop like Kendrick great storyteller Eminem great storyteller Chance the Rapper great storyteller like there's T.I. Dude, T.I. T.I is my fucking favorite. T.I. Great. 50 Cent. Great storyteller. 50 Cent. Brilliant comedian.

Oh, I bet. He might be the funniest human being alive. 50's a legend. Did you ever see the text he sent, the tweet he sent about Floyd Mayweather? The reading? Which one? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I challenge you. Did you see the one he said? I've been joking around about the champ. He is the number one champ. Floyd Mayweather is the best boxer that's ever been. Would someone please read this to him? That's so good, dude.

It's so good. Somebody please read this to him. He's so good. And he's just casually the funniest guy on the internet. Oh, it's so good. Read a whole page of Harry Potter. No stopping and no mess ups. Yeah. Dude. So petty. He's the fucking greatest. So good. What do you think? It's so interesting. I mean, I'm so obsessed with like...

Nashville and what's happening there with especially because it seems like such a fun community yeah and it seems like I wish that happened with comedy I wish we all worked on each other's specials and like made sure the guy had a great fucking special and you know you know it'd be good like

We don't, we don't do, maybe they do that a little more now at Joe's Club because it's so tight. I mean, Austin's like. Yeah, right, right. Like you don't, not everyone's loud in that green room. Yeah. It's like, it's a team. Yeah, yeah. But like when I get to do a special, I'm very neurotic about it being my words. Like I don't like, I won't take a lot of jokes. I'll take a line. I'll take like two words.

from someone if I trust them and they're on tour with me. Like food cuck. That's one of the funniest things I've ever heard. Just put it on a t-shirt. What if I went on tour with musicians? and hung out around music and music writing if I could write better stand-up. Because Jelly did that when he came on tour with us. He was like, I'm getting away from music.

I just want to laugh. Yeah. I don't know. I want to be inspired from a different direction. I think that would be awesome. I mean, I know we'd have a blast. Our worlds go together so well anyway. Like I said, it's all funny people. And so we're going to have laughs and fun. We're going to be inspired by each other for sure. Maybe the hardest jelly has ever made a group of comedians laugh is the fucking most hysterical moment.

is we're under this tent. We're all smoking weed. It's me, Attell, Mark Norman, Sam Morrell. I mean, it's fucking, it's, I mean, I'm forgetting huge comics over there. Dan Soder. Dan Soder. Big Jay. Big Jay Oakerson. and jelly goes do you know who i just discovered and we're like who and he goes mitch headberg and we're like oh yeah he's like dude he is fucking awesome he's like the best comic what's he up to

Big J goes, I got some bad news for you, Jelly. What's his deal? Where's he at? Big J goes, he's dead. He just discovered it that day. And then found out he was dead. And we were laughing so fucking hard. We were like... We just got an idol and lost one all in the same day. It was a rough day. Oh, that made us laugh. We talked... Jay will text me about that. Oh, discovering Michael Jackson, July 7th, 2010.

Look at this guy. He's doing all kinds of dances and stuff. What is this guy? All right. Bass fishing versus salt fishing. Saltwater fishing. Bass. Totally. Okay. Hold on. The lifestyles are totally different. I think it's what your lifestyle you're subscribing to. I think the... Bass fishing is not as big of a commitment. Oh, that is so true. Because you can kind of like call it...

I'll be like, yeah, and get out of there. If you're not vibing, are you getting smacked by mosquitoes? Like, I don't care if I catch any fish. I'm probably going to have a... $200 worth of McDonald's for dinner. So it's kind of like if nothing's happening, I'll be able to fucking go. But if you're, you know, I feel like saltwater, you're kind of tapped into a longer day.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. You got to get to the dock. You got to get out to the fishing spot. Yeah. Maybe go catch bait. Oh, you got to catch bait. And then you got to float around as they track the bottom of the ocean. Yeah. They're like, hold on. Hold on. All right, here should be good. Yeah. Yeah, it's... I get anxious. I would rather a boat day, like knowing I'm going to have a chill boat day than like...

I'm going to go try fishing. I'm going to go fish all day. I'd rather just be on a boat. That's my expectation. Then I wouldn't feel like I might have to get somewhere. But if I'm fishing, I might be like, I might got to go somewhere and I've got to be able to get there. We were, this is just a cool story. I'm kind of high. So we went shark fishing. Do you want to smoke?

I didn't think you did, but today could be the day. No, I throw up when I smoke. Smoke four times, throw up four times. It's real too. Wow. We took a one hitter at our friend Matt and Emma's house. In the bathroom, we hit a one-hitter. And she goes, sometimes I throw up if I smoke weed. And I was like, it'll be fine. Just take one hit. She took a hit. She goes, here we go. And threw up immediately. And I was like, wow, that's crazy. I think four good tries.

I'm good. Yeah, you're good to go. We're good on that. But she also got edibles one time. And they're like, they're like such a rookie. Like I'm going to buy weed. She's never been into a dispensary. And. And I think we were at the old house and you were having a hard time sleeping. Yes. She goes, do you have something? It's not like, I don't want to get high, I just want to sleep. And they were like, oh yeah, we got these. And they gave her like 10 milligram midnight gummies.

And it's like 10 milligrams. And she goes, oh, cool. Does not check the dosage. Just thinks this will put me to sleep. And she said, she goes, I can't. Seeing fireworks in my eyes all night. Kaleidoscopes. It was like kaleidoscopes in my eyelids. I didn't sleep a wink. And I was like, you know what? Wee's just not for me. Yeah.

I'm happy to have a drink. Sounds like a fantastic experience. No, I hated it because I was trying to sleep. Sounds like you had a doozy of a time. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that sucks. Yeah, don't start today. No. Sorry. No, this is my... I just think this is a good story because I'm high. Is that how we got here? Depends on where we are. We were in Maine and we were shark fishing. We were fishing for like...

Great white shark, like big shark. And we had two boats. We had a boat we were fishing on. Then we had a camera crew shooting on the other boat. And we were maybe, I'm not even joking, from here to the furthest part of this room, apart from each other. We were close. So it's not that far away because they're shooting us. We don't catch anything. We fish for like six hours and we don't get a bite. We have no episode. We didn't get anything. So I go, I got an idea.

I said, I'll give $1,000 to anyone on that boat who will swim to this boat. And everyone's like. Now, mind you, we had not caught a shark in six hours. We'd chum in the water like crazy. We had not caught a shark. There's no shark in that water. And everyone's like, no. I go, $2,000. I'm like, no. I go, $10,000. It is a...

30-foot swim. And everyone's like, uh-uh. The idea. The idea. There's a shark in there. And I go, $20,000. And everyone's like, fuck off. Oh, my God. And I was like, that was more exciting than fishing. all day, the idea that no one would swim 20 feet in water that had been chummed, knowing we could not catch a shark. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Still, there's going to be one shark that's just waiting. Wait a minute, they're going to fucking sit in one of their dumb asses.

That's just down here in a minute. I've been waiting for our human because I know them. I normally do some stupid shit. I know this. If I wait long enough, they're going to swim across. They're just there kind of. idling just waiting circling she wrote a story about Dolly Parton writing I will always love you she wrote I will always love you and she

gave it to Elvis. And Elvis says, yeah, I'll take it, but I want to own it. I want to own the right. She goes, no, I want to own it. He was like, no, that's how it works. If you want Elvis to sing your song, then I got to own it. She goes, then I'll just sing it myself.

She was like, that was the smartest thing I ever did in my entire life. I would say so. Yeah. Good for her. What a badass. Who do you want to meet in country music? Who's someone you haven't met do you want to meet? George Strait. George Strait? Yeah. Of course I'd love to meet Dolly. I got to meet Willie. Me and Jelly Roll opened for Willie Nelson two summers ago, which was crazy. We both got to meet him at the same time.

We both came out on stage with Willie at Stagecoach. And me and Jelly Roll are like side stage, just geeking out like, dude, we're about to be on stage. at stagecoach with Willie Nelson singing May the Circle Be Unbroken. That's crazy. And we did. And what else did he sing? Amazing Grace or something. And then It's Hard Being Humble. Wow. Yeah. Wow. And I'm just like, it's me, Jelly Roll. And Charlie Crockett.

He forged his own path there, Willie Nelson, didn't he? He has a cool story in how he came out. Great story. Songwriter, true blue, came to Nashville, didn't fit in. Short hair. Short hair, went back to Texas, turned into a hippie, got in with the crowd. And then, you know, then he got the cool shine when he came tonight and wrote Crazy. Patsy Cline cut Crazy. And then so he was getting, stacking all these records up and growing a catalog as a songwriter.

And then I believe Starlight album was his first big pop off, which was mostly covers and old standards, right? So that… Yeah, the freaking—or was it Starlight or Stardust? I think it's Starlight. Starlight is right. Yeah. Nonetheless, dude, when Longhair Willie came back— And then, which was actually technically Shotgun Willie. That was like, oh, that's our guy. He's the hippie pothead, easygoing. Yeah. What a cool...

What a cool dude. And he made such a great environment in Texas for people like Waylon to come and play whenever they wanted. Right. Made it kind of an open forum, come play with Willie anytime you want. They didn't call it, they were never calling themselves outlaws either. That's what everybody else called them. They were just having their era. They were just of the time on the outskirts. They didn't want to dress like Glen Campbell. You know, they wanted to do...

Do you guys feel like your generation is kin to that at least a little bit? It's got to be kin to it, but the music isn't the same. I mean, I obviously pay homage to that era of music in my own, but the landscape's so different. And genres aren't as defined as they were then either. So like while that, while, yeah, you can compare kind of a movement and as far as like friendships and stuff. Yeah. Yes. But like.

Its place in the market share is totally different than Willie and Waylon and, you know, the outlaws or the highwaymen would have been. But do you think that there's like a... As you said, Brad Paisley, I was like, I wonder if there's a generation of, not Clint Black, but a generation of Nashville that looks at you guys like maybe they were more corporate.

I don't know anything about Garth Brooks, really. I think that was corporate. More commercial. More commercial. When you guys are very much underground, I think. As big as you guys all are, and as big as many fucking... times as Jelly's going to get slimed, he's still... Still underground. He's still underground. That's why he's cool. Yeah, the underdogs, just on the outskirts, not necessarily aiming for the middle. And I think that's like...

That's just who we are in real life. So our music is just that too. Dude, you met us. We just have fun making music. If we're stressing, the song's going to suck. So here's the thing about you guys. I say this for real. You guys would all be the funnest guys to dig a hole with. Like you're just regular guys that happen to be fun as fuck. Digging a hole. It would be fun, I guess, with us.

Depending on the purpose of the huddle, right? Can we just like sit and drink a beer? If I had a job, if I worked with you guys and we had to dig holes all day, I would still have fun with you. Like I always say like Dan Soder would be the greatest guy. to sit next to at a wedding that you didn't know. Because he's so funny that you'd be like, or like Big Jay Oakson would be the greatest guy to sit next to at the DMV. Yeah. And he's cutting on everybody. He's so funny.

Yes. But it's the thing that I think, but when we went to Nashville, she was like, I want to live here. This is fucking amazing. I really like Nashville. I got a nice... Nashville list for y'all, whenever, of all to-dos and places to be. We're coming. We're coming in middle October. Okay, awesome. We're looking at properties in October. Sick. And then, well, I don't think we'll ever leave LA. We'll always have a house here. Yeah.

But it's like, there's just, there's something very authentic about the people that live there. I mean, even like, like she did a live podcast at Zany's and like Theo showed up just to say hi, you know, like that. It's like. Regular people. Theo pops up to everything in Nashville. He's such a good friend to all of us, and he's obviously integrated himself.

entirely into the Nashville. Theo pops up at everything. His calendar looks fucking wild to me. Crazy. He'll be like, holy shit, he's at the UFC. He'll be at Fenwick's at breakfast on Thursday morning and then he'll be walking out with Trump Thursday evening and then he's, yeah, then he's with Morgan in New York City.

city and now he's with Jelly Roll. I just saw him with Jelly Roll and Wiz Khalifa. And I was like, Jesus. And he does it all sober. That's what's impressive. Good for him. I never really knew him partying. I haven't really known him partying either. I think he did it very quietly. I think it was something that no one saw. I don't know what it was, but I partied a lot, and he never partied with me.

Be good or be good at it. Yeah, right. So tell me about the show tonight. We're coming to the show tonight. Yeah, dude. Do you already know your set list? Do you have any surprises? Like, do you have any, like, I always wonder, like. I got my set list. Yeah? Yeah. Is your son coming?

He's going to come to sound check after this, but it's going to be his bedtime. I don't go on until like 10 o'clock. How old is he? Three and a half. We kept him out late for the Dodgers game last night. So cute. Yeah, he's sweet. Does he know his name? No. Ryman. Oh, I love it. I love it. Ryman St. Smith. Nice. Yeah. Ryman's a badass fucking name. The Ryman's one of the coolest theaters. I'll show you a picture of him. Let's see.

What a cutie pie. You think you guys will have more? He looks like you. We're like playing rock, paper, scissors about it in the car type shit. Oh, my God. He's adorable. I'm up 1-0. I don't know if we are or not. I don't know. I kind of want to. I kind of want him to have a sibling. He was tough at sleeping for like 18 months. So it was like, it's really hard to imagine. Did you watch Squid Games at all?

Did you watch that show? He's like, what the fuck? Was that keeping him up? He couldn't stop watching Squid Game. No, but you know how at the end, when Bro gets off the train... and he's going up the escalator, and then he turns around and looks back at the train like he's about to go back. Yeah. That's what it felt like for a minute having a second kid. Oh. By the way, yeah. It's like, wait, you just got out of the hard part.

Why would you go right back in it? When we had Isla, we were in the hospital. Georgia was, what, 18 months old? No, two. Two years old. Isla, we bring her into the hospital. We're so happy. Just had another kid. This is great. And I'm at the foot of the bed in a cot and I hear her cry. And I go, fuck, what did we do? We just got out of this. We had the same problem. Georgia didn't sleep.

Until she was 20 months. And we were 18 months. And we had Isla when Georgia was 25 months. So I had five months of sleep. Oh my gosh. And then I was right back in it. But I'm an only child. I hated being an only child. There was no world where we were not having two. At least two. But you weren't going to Braves games or anything.

No. Did you have a group of friends? Like, did you have a bunch of cousins and stuff? But it's not the same. That's why, like, I feel like if we're in that window right now, if we're going to do it, we've got to do it. You do it now. Yeah. Hold on. It's my daughter. She's at college. Hold on. Hello, baby girl. Here, take this and why don't you go out with mom? Okay. We'll wrap this up. I'm excited for the show tonight.

Yeah, we got a merch pack for you when you get there. Oh, for real? Shirts and hats and koozies and shit. I'm excited, man. Dude, thank you so much for having me on your podcast. This is a dream come true. Yeah, truly. I'm a big fan of you. So thank you for having me. I'm a fan of you, brother. It's been... It's cool to fucking... I don't know. It's like...

When you write music, other people take it in and it gets to tell us a story. I was like, how do I get ready for this interview? And I was like, I can watch other interviews he's done. And I was like... I was like, or maybe I could just listen to his music. I was like, I'll do that.

And I was like, I'm just going to listen to his music. And so for the past few days, I've just listened to everything, everything. Like I've listened to everything you've written for other people. I've listened to everything you've done. Was it flowers? Flower Shops with Morgan was the first kind of.

the album Flowers? Yeah, Flower Shops. Flower Shops, Earn, and then the new one, Nashville, Tennessee. Nashville, Tennessee. Yeah. And I've just been like, wow, that's crazy, man. You can just get... to know an artist by listening to what they write about. Yeah, man. And, and then, and then I go, and then I'm, and then I go, I got really curious and I was like, I was like, I want to fucking find out about this. And, uh,

And you've been a fucking joy to research, man. Oh man, that's cool. It's not, that's like the coolest comment you could give someone is like, this was fun getting ready to get to know you. That's cool. Thank you. And I'll tell you that you playing that fucking song, that unreleased song. Blacked out. It's one of the fucking coolest moments I've ever had on this podcast. Wow. Thank you. Thanks for letting me play your guitar. That was fun. Fuck yeah. I've never done that. I've never...

put blacked out in the world like that. Oh, it was so fucking good. It was so good. And the fucking Willie song. All of today was fun as shit, man. This is what I wanted this podcast to be. Well, thanks, bro. Tonight's going to be awesome. I look forward to seeing you there. I can't wait. I got a meeting, a nap, and then I'm ready. All right. All right. Text me and you get there. This episode was brought to you by The Machine.

This transcript was generated by Metacast using AI and may contain inaccuracies. Learn more about transcripts.