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Carroll Worldwide

Carroll Worldwidecarrollworldwide.libsyn.com
Carroll Worldwide is Carroll County Maryland’s premiere weekly podcast hosted by local business owners and personalities. Carroll Worldwide features updates on current events, reports on local Facebook community forums spanning Westminster, Eldersburg, Sykesville and more with irreverent commentary and scorching hot takes (aka satire). Tune in using any podcast app you like if you want to a good-natured laugh about your community. Business sponsorships are available!
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Episodes

Man vs Bear

We explore the "man vs bear in a forest" and Sherri answers. A cat gets into someone's pond and wreaks havoc. People are cussing out employees at Lowe's. Cameras to the rescue once again. Guys who don't understand things are getting unhinged over drag bingos. Dennis reveals the drama of his job. And just how many supplements is Randy on???

May 01, 202441 min

Two Smoking Ladies

The gang catches up on the time off. Dennis goes to Disneyworld. A guy in Westminster Community Online is distraught by Gandalf's sunglasses. A gentleman in Hampstead is looking for a new neighbor and has high standards for attractivenes. Randy just hopes the Burger King lesbians kissed. Don't make Sherri laugh too hard.

Apr 16, 202445 min

McDemons

Carroll County has actual demons, and not just the management at one of the local McDonald’s. A lesson is learned in audacity, older women are hotter, and for the love of everything, please know what you want when you go through the drive thru! Also, we decide to stop bleeping cuss words and throw around the idea of taking the podcast to a live audience near you!

Nov 02, 202348 min

The Petsitter's Destiny

The gang talks about "The Ick", and the lack of balance between men and women in the game of attraction. But enough of that, let's talk about the biggest story to hit Carroll County since the last "What was that boom??"..... Petsittergate, 2023!

Sep 06, 20231 hr 1 min

Phoenix Rising

Sherri makes some exiting announcements, Randy has too many near death experiences, Dennis mansplains dick pics. Let’s talk about a$$ eaters, unwanted texts, dinosaur farts and power outages- all in this week's episode of your favorite podcast.

Aug 24, 202342 min

The One Where Dennis Splits His Pants

Randy has a disappointing time at Pride. Social Media makes a deep dive into Sherri with no foreplay. Dennis revels in the ultimate destruction of Denny’s.

Jul 20, 202352 min

Klanned Karenhood

Randy discusses his drug of choice and bad parking. Dennis segues the hell of this episode and discusses patriotic gas prices and bad parking. Sherri tries to decipher some frum the hills speak and delivers another scathing top ten.

Jul 06, 202349 min

Sick Freak Moron

If someone forgets a chicken on the roof of their car in a Walmart parking lot and drives away, was it alive or deep fried? Randy finds his #AdminGoals. Dennis looks forward to a new Maryland holiday. Sherri receives some hate online.

Jun 22, 202343 min

Bizarro Rainbow

Dennis gets back in the game by bringing us a baby rental opportunity. Sherri chronicles another creepy cafe encounter. Randy makes the case that we are living in a parallel dimension.

Jun 08, 202350 min

Rat King

Randy likes big cameras and he cannot lie. And Dennis cannot deny. When Sherri walks in with a fresh top ten And rest of her o-pin-ins We get worldwide.

May 25, 202342 min

Guber

The Golden Tractor Crank is back with Goat Rentals! Sherri regales us with a story of a horrible customer. Randy wants credit for not running over pedestrians, and unveils his "one bolt" theory about rollercoasters. Dennis is asked for his analysis of the big booty bitches. And what is going on in New Windsor???

May 10, 202349 min

The Belltower Stables

This week the gang tackles a myriad Carroll of topics. Randy hates tweets, community group chats and the latest android update. Sherri gets decorating tips from a helpful patron. Dennis considers a new career as a Hallmark movie writer. Bonus: a deep dive into the great clock tower caper of 2023.

Apr 27, 202346 min

Just Don't Be A Pig

The restaurant industry is out of control. Randy has something to say to a Sykesville community group. Sherri reads some of her creepy DMs, and Dennis shows up with no surprises, but a guy did try to rob a bank through the drive-thru.

Mar 23, 202346 min

Closep

International Womens Day is kicked off with indecent exposure in New Windsor. A new kind of stripper is hitting the poles in Vegas. A guy makes 5 women cry in CVS. Also, a business in Hampstead has been raked over the coals of social media. Is "MacDonald's" really "Closep"? And are we really ready for the gang's alter egos, Dennisn't, Randolph The Grey, and Sharold? Lots to unpack in this angry and sex-crazed episode!

Mar 09, 202343 min

Make Mine A Medium

On this weeks episode the gang discusses bad behavior at restaurants, the beyond, and STDs. Also- where do you fall on the Oxford Comma?

Feb 23, 202346 min

Boston Inn Crème Pie

AI takes over the pod. Things are discarded on the mean streets of Carroll. The gang discusses the Pros & Cons of Door Dash. Sherri summarizes a Karen. Is Randy being trolled by a family member? Dennis discusses the state of standardized math tests in Maryland. Listen at your own risk.

Feb 09, 202331 min

On Brandy

The gang takes on everything from Big Randy surveillance, gentleman farmers, racist mechanics, drag queens and anonymous posters. Is Dennis a robot? Is Randy a drag queen? Is Sherri terrified of artificial intelligence? Listen up, bitches.

Jan 26, 202350 min

BJs & Spike Strips

Creepy fast food managers, missing person scams, a crazy woman ranting, a man getting violent over the idea of baked goods, spike strips, bjs and vasectomies, are all on this episode. Welcome back, Carroll County!

Jan 19, 202340 min

We Own This County

Sherri takes on the Carroll County Board of Education, Dennis exposes possible corruption in the local Sherriff's department. Randy paid how much for a Burrito?

Jun 08, 202245 min

The Relaunch

Dennis ruminates on the current state of Facebook and the times they are a changin'. Sherri is shot out of a cannon with local and national issues. Randy parties with his son's fraternity and ends up in the hospital. The gang actually finds a national social issue that does NOT divide us as a nation!

May 11, 202236 min

Everything About Everyone

Dennis unwittingly helps Randy hatch a scheme to get widespread surveillance for the people, by the people. Sherri thinks Randy has lost his mind. A Taneytown neighbor puts up a stern warning about dog poop. A Westminter woman is screaming obscenities at passers by, and we bring back the beloved segment, "Sherri, Make It Cynical".

Mar 30, 202230 min

So, It's International Women's Month

So, a Mcdonalds Karen spends way too much time chasing a happy meal. A road Karen tries to out a dangerous driver, but the post didn't pan out the way the original poster wanted. Vandalism rocks downtown Westminster, and Sherri is celebrated for Womens month! Dennis and Randy agree to pause being total chauvinists for the remainder of the month.

Mar 09, 202231 min

Double Dunkin' the Double Duncles

A local nail salon is having a little too much fun with womens' feet. Dennis finds a story about uncle dads that trumps Randy's redneck lineage. A dog decided to ruin Sherri's day, while she was on the way to the podcast. Sherri tells us of a local newspaper stealing scumbag who is caught stealing newspapers with the help of a Ring Video Camera. Randy gets the ultimate high-ground on one of his biggest rivals. Bonus: Someone needs a "private" autopsy company.

Mar 03, 202233 min

Pacer Test

The gang decides that a disturbing image depicting children engaged in a lip-lock (made by the Concerned Parents of Carroll County) should be much more concerning. Concerning cameras, however, Big Randy remains the concerned Alpha Sigma of neighborhood tactical intelligence. Sherri is less concerned with people breaking into her house, while Dennis doesn't concern masks to racism unlike some other fake accounts concerning the Carroll County Times page.

Feb 17, 202234 min

InstaCon

The gang talks about what they did during their break. Randy does a spot on impression of Anthony Soprano Jr. Sherri brags about having no friends. And we uncover an Instacart grift that blows up into a biggest drama of 2022 on the Westminster Community Online. It's so bad that Dennis leaves the podcast early. Sherri proclaims the customer is not always right!

Feb 10, 202240 min

How the Bitch Stole Christmas

Join the gang as we bring you our annual Holiday episode. A timeless holiday classic, will the Bitch succeed in ruining Christmas for all the Westys down in Westnumbstern? Sit back with your cocoa in front of a roaring fire and enjoy our gift to you, completely uncensored and NSFW.

Dec 22, 20219 min

The Gary Before Christmas

Twas the Gary before Christmas And all through the house Not a wall was left standing Not even this louse The drywall was hung With a belch and a swear No MHIC either He just doesn't care The children were horrified hiding in their bed The reviews of his work Oh, what they read Passed out at the library A filthy redneck We' re calling our lawyer Just look at our deck! When out on the lawn There arose such a clatter I sprang from my bed to see What was the matter When what to my wondering eye Sho...

Dec 16, 20212 min

Doug Life

Carroll Worldwide welcomes Doug Weatherholtz of Island Green Family Fun Center! Doug talks about all the new goings on at Island Green, especially his new pub and grill! Dennis makes Randy and Sherri want to lay down and die. Sherri makes us all want to catch "these hands".

Dec 09, 202137 min

Miss Information

This episode sponsored by Island Green Family Fun Center! Randy recounts the Sykesville Craft Beer Festival and smashes some craft brews and some false information. Dennis admits to liking a taboo drink once in a while. The gang gets hot and heavy over using other people's trash cans, panties left at a BBQ joint, and a couch for sale which includes bodily fluids. And we're left with the big question: What the hell did Taylor Swift do to Sherri???

Dec 02, 202133 min

The 100th Episode

Carroll Worldwide celebrates their 100th episode with special guests: Dennis' dog, Trash Panda, The Groundhog That Got Shot By The Sherrif A Few Years Ago, and our very special honored and world renown guest: THE Harper Smythe! And of course we cover local topics, like kids vandalizing local property, and people crying over a local festival that had COVID requirements.

Nov 04, 202135 min
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