Dr. Lisa and Reena welcome special guest Dr. Laurence Steinberg, Professor of Psychology at Temple University, to celebrate the publication of his latest book You And Your Adult Child: How To Grow Together In Challenging Times. Dr. Steinberg unpacks key research and decades of experience to answer questions from Ask Lisa listeners: How long should you financially support your kids? What if your parents aren’t the grandparents you hoped they'd be? When should you speak out about worrisome choices...
Apr 18, 2023•40 min•Ep 115•Transcript available on Metacast Does it always make sense for students to enroll in college immediately after high school? Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss when and why parents might want to think seriously about having a teen take a gap year. They weigh the pros and cons of "stepping off the conveyor belt" to college and talk about how gap years are best spent. Reena shares her concern that allowing a gap year makes college less likely. Dr. Lisa explains how having an extra year can go a long way toward helping students make the mo...
Apr 11, 2023•32 min•Ep 114•Transcript available on Metacast From not getting into a desired college to not making a team - how do we help kids process unfairness? A dad writes in asking for help when his high school junior loses the National Honors Society presidency to a classmate known for online posts about drinking. Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss how to help kids come to terms with unfairness and privilege as they play out in school, sports, and leadership positions. Dr. Lisa reminds parents of the importance of helping kids develop the capacity to toler...
Apr 04, 2023•30 min•Ep 113•Transcript available on Metacast How do you know if your child has a gaming addiction? A mom writes in worried about her son who used gaming to connect with friends during the pandemic but now games alone while his friends spend time together in person. Dr. Lisa unpacks the research on gaming hazards and addiction, as well as some unexpected benefits of gaming. Reena gets answers to key questions: When is it time to worry that a kid is spending too much time gaming? And what should parents do? AVAILABLE NOW Lisa’s new book: The...
Mar 28, 2023•30 min•Ep 112•Transcript available on Metacast Parents seeking professional support for their kids often run into a confusing array of therapies to choose from. In this episode, Dr. Lisa provides a neutral guide on the various options - DBT, CBT, talk therapy, somatic therapy, play therapy, and family therapy - and describes which options are the best fit for which concerns. From Freudian therapy to body-based treatments, Dr. Lisa and Reena give listeners an accessible guide to therapeutic interventions. AVAILABLE NOW Lisa’s new book: The Em...
Mar 21, 2023•32 min•Transcript available on Metacast What’s the difference between real and faux self-care? Dr. Pooja Lakshmin helps us rethink what it means to care for ourselves and answers listeners' questions related to her new book, Real Self-Care: A Transformative Program for Redefining Wellness (Crystals, Cleanses, and Bubble Baths Not Included). Dr. Lisa and Reena find out how to realistically manage life's pressures - from raising kids to managing aging parents - while making self-care a priority. Dr. Lakshmin discusses the personal journ...
Mar 14, 2023•30 min•Ep 110•Transcript available on Metacast How should you respond when your kids are mean to you? What’s age appropriate behavior and what should not be tolerated? Dr. Lisa and Reena unpack why kids lash out and what’s behind the outbursts. How do you know when hormones are the cause or when it’s something else? Dr. Lisa has advice on how to create a safe space for kids at home that allows them to work through their frustrations but also teaches them what’s acceptable in the real world. This episode is an encore presentation that origina...
Mar 07, 2023•33 min•Ep 109•Transcript available on Metacast Preparing for life after high school is about more than just getting into college - it’s also about having the ability to operate independently. A parent writes in worried about a charming, but disorganized, son. Dr. Lisa explains what executive functioning skills are - and how to help kids build them. Dr. Lisa and Reena address what drives procrastination in kids, how adults can provide executive functioning "training wheels," and how to get kids to do things like homework without having to nag...
Feb 28, 2023•34 min•Ep 108•Transcript available on Metacast Dr. Lisa’s new book The Emotional Lives of Teenagers is officially out today in print and audio book. In this episode Lisa and Reena discuss Lisa’s new book and the research behind it. Lisa explains why she felt passionate about writing the book, the strategies it offers parents for navigating the teen years, and how it will help parents know what's typical teen behavior and when it's time to worry. Reena asks if the pandemic forever changed teen behavior and how gender influences the experience...
Feb 21, 2023•34 min•Ep 107•Transcript available on Metacast Parents should view sexual development as a facet of overall healthy development, but that's not always easy to do. Dr. Lisa and Reena unpack the concept of “the sex talk" and Lisa explains that, instead of a single sit-down, conversations about physical intimacy should be short, start earlier than expected, and happen over time. Reena asks how parents can find openings to discuss sex when it can be such an awkward topic, and whether parents should really expect (or even want) for their kids to ...
Feb 14, 2023•32 min•Ep 106•Transcript available on Metacast How should a parent respond to a kid who seems to complain all the time? Dr. Lisa explains why complaints, though often tedious to listen to, can actually play an important role in healthy development. Reena points out that parents are usually exhausted and trying to keep a positive energy around the house; Dr. Lisa and Reena address how parents might balance allowing kids to vent with the fact that complaining can bring everyone down. This episode also addresses when it's time to worry about co...
Feb 07, 2023•29 min•Ep 105•Transcript available on Metacast A teen confides to her mother that she is gay but doesn’t want her dad to know. Her mother writes the Ask Lisa podcast with several questions: How can parents best support teens who identify as LGBTQ+? Is it right to hold information from the other parent? How should the family handle sleepovers with same-sex peers? Dr. Lisa explains how worried kids can be when they come out to their parents; Reena asks how parents should respond if they wonder if their child is going through a phase. Dr. Lisa ...
Jan 31, 2023•32 min•Ep 104•Transcript available on Metacast Vaping has become a growing concern for many parents of tweens and teens. What can adults do to steer kids clear of it, and what should we do to help kids who find themselves hooked on nicotine? Dr. Lisa discusses research-based strategies that can keep kids from experimenting with vaping or help them stop once they've started. Reena asks for advice on helping kids deal with peer pressure around vaping. Resources: This is Quitting online community to help people who are addicted to nicotine Lisa...
Jan 24, 2023•30 min•Ep 103•Transcript available on Metacast A parent writes in that her teen sent a group text to his classmates that contained racial and homophobic slurs about another kid. He thought he was being funny, but quickly realized that his classmates didn't agree. The boy and his parents understand that there's a price to pay for his actions, but his mom worries that he may be canceled. Dr. Lisa walks us through the long road ahead to try to make things right and the fact that redemption isn't always guaranteed. Reena asks how children can le...
Jan 17, 2023•28 min•Ep 102•Transcript available on Metacast Is it normal for my teen son to not want to talk to me? That’s the question we tackle this week. Dr. Lisa explains that it can feel like a personal rejection when teens pull away from their parents, but that is rarely the case. So how do parents stay invested and find connection? Lisa and Reena unpack the strategies that work and Lisa draws on research from her new book The Emotional Lives of Teenagers. The conversation turns to how, without meaning to, we socialize boys to be less fluent in the...
Jan 10, 2023•33 min•Ep 101•Transcript available on Metacast We all want to start the New Year feeling our best, but that's a tall order for the many parents who feel mentally and physically exhausted. In response to a question from a parent asking how she can feel less stressed, anxious, and harried, Dr. Lisa and Reena consider what makes for effective self-care, how to hit the reset button, the science behind maintaining a sense of equilibrium, and why parenting can feel so hard - even when things are going well. Pre-order The Emotional Lives of Teenage...
Jan 03, 2023•34 min•Transcript available on Metacast The holidays can usher in a focus on spending and consumerism. How do we instill healthy values in our kids, make sure that they appreciate what really matters in life, and keep them from becoming preoccupied with wealth or material objects? Dr. Lisa and Reena tackle the critical question of what parents can do to keep kids grounded and Lisa unpacks research on what really works. Pre-order The Emotional Lives of Teenagers by Dr. Lisa Damour. Available at www.DrLisaDamour.com Follow us on Instagr...
Dec 27, 2022•28 min•Ep 99•Transcript available on Metacast Having friendships with families where the kids and adults love hanging out can be wonderful. But what happens when the kids’ relationships sour or they drift in different directions? Dr. Lisa helps parents navigate the tricky conversations they may need to have with their friends. What should parents do when they know that their kid is being excluded? Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss how to start a conversation with the adults who are involved without making the whole situation worse. Follow us on In...
Dec 13, 2022•34 min•Ep 98•Transcript available on Metacast Today's technology allows us to know a lot more about our kids than our parents ever knew about us. So...is it a good idea to track your teen's location? While parents might track their teens for supervision and safety reasons, teens often long for more independence and privacy than tracking allows. Dr. Lisa explains why this tension is an expectable, healthy part of adolescent development and unpacks two key questions: What, exactly, does tracking accomplish? And does it really help to keep tee...
Dec 06, 2022•32 min•Ep 97•Transcript available on Metacast Having conversations with our kids about money can be difficult. So how do we set them up for good financial health? Financial expert Bobbi Rebell, author of Launching Financial Grownups: Live Your Richest Life by Helping Your (Almost) Adult Kids Become Everyday Money Smart, joins the Ask Lisa Podcast as a special guest. The conversation answers key questions from listeners, including: How do we get kids to understand the value of the things they have? Should you do allowances? How do you teach ...
Nov 29, 2022•38 min•Ep 96•Transcript available on Metacast The holidays can be both joyful and stressful. Being in close quarters with relatives whose political or social views are completely different from yours can make this busy time of year even more challenging. Dr. Lisa offers a plan to help families and their kids avoid conflict when possible and cope with any friction that does arise. She also lays out a game plan for how to talk with our kids about guests and relatives who don't make for great company. Lisa and Reena offer this holiday encore p...
Nov 22, 2022•29 min•Ep 95•Transcript available on Metacast A parent writes in asking for help for their teen who feels intensely anxious about going to school and interacting with adults outside the home. Dr. Lisa explains that the need to stay close to home during the height of the pandemic has made it hard for many young people to spread their wings now. Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss the root causes of clinginess and separation anxiety and how those causes can differ depending on a child's age. Their conversation addresses what adults can do now to help ...
Nov 15, 2022•33 min•Ep 94•Transcript available on Metacast Grades can be a source of family anxiety and stress, and online grading portals can make the situation both better and worse. A dad writes in asking how parents and kids can better manage online grades. Reena explains that she gets pinged on email every time her kids' grades are posted and Dr. Lisa has surprising advice for parents in the same boat. Dr. Lisa explains the upsides and downsides of having access to online grades, and how families can use these systems to help kids become more indep...
Nov 08, 2022•36 min•Ep 93•Transcript available on Metacast How should we talk to our kids about what it means to fall in love? Parents know how good it can feel to make a strong connection and be on the receiving end of affection, but we also want to shield kids from heartbreak. Dr. Lisa helps walks us through how we can talk with our kids about both the emotional and physical sides of love, while Reena asks key questions about how to deal with the fact that these conversations are often uncomfortable for both parents and kids. Dr. Lisa explains how we ...
Nov 01, 2022•29 min•Transcript available on Metacast How can we support kids who feel uncomfortable about the timing of puberty? A parent writes in asking what to say to a late bloomer who feels out of step with her peers. Dr. Lisa unpacks the research on what it means to reach puberty early - or late - and how this differs depending on gender. Reena and Dr. Lisa address whether there's such a thing as perfectly timed puberty, and how to talk about the changes that come with puberty in ways that won't send tweens and teens running for the hills. T...
Oct 25, 2022•33 min•Ep 91•Transcript available on Metacast Do violent video games normalize violence? A parent whose son becomes more aggressive with his sisters after playing certain games writes in asking for advice. Is it best to pull the plug on games like Fortnite and Grand Theft Auto, even if they're important to a boy's social life? Dr. Lisa unpacks the research on how violent video games affect kids and offers guidelines to consider. Reena asks how old kids should be if they are going to play video games and describes how allowing her son to pla...
Oct 18, 2022•33 min•Ep 90•Transcript available on Metacast How do we help teens take ownership of their lives, especially if they are feeling overwhelmed by all that adults are asking of them? Dr. Lisa explains how parents can move from nagging teens to seeing themselves as teachers who help teens become increasingly independent. The conversation also details the important role of adults outside the home, and the one thing Dr. Lisa has seen transform even the most reluctant teens into young people who can advocate for themselves. Follow us on Instagram,...
Oct 11, 2022•31 min•Ep 89•Transcript available on Metacast How do you help a teen who won't stop smoking marijuana? When does a family need to step in? A mom writes in asking for help for her son who has been caught smoking marijuana both at school and at home. Dr. Lisa explains what parents should know about substance abuse, and Reena asks how best to explain the risks of marijuana to kids, especially in light of widespread legalization. The conversation also covers the concept of “self-medicating” and why some kids think it’s okay to use marijuana to ...
Oct 04, 2022•32 min•Ep 88•Transcript available on Metacast A parent who hates sleepovers writes in to ask if they are really necessary. Dr. Lisa and Reena weigh the social costs of not allowing kids to host or attend sleepovers and what parents can do instead. They also address the clear parameters that can reduce the downsides of sleepovers, raise concerns parents may not have thought of, and detail the kinds of conversations parents might have with their kids if sleepovers are going to be allowed. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedI...
Sep 27, 2022•33 min•Ep 87•Transcript available on Metacast College can be incredibly expensive, so how should parents think about covering the cost? What do we say to our kids about what we can, or are willing, to pay? How do you make the most of 529 plans? Dr. Lisa and Reena tackle these questions and more with special guest Ron Lieber, author of The Price You Pay for College: An Entirely New Roadmap for the Biggest Financial Decision Your Family Will Ever Make. Resources from Ron Lieber Ron Lieber on 529 plans: A Tax Strategy for 529 College Savings A...
Sep 20, 2022•49 min•Ep 86•Transcript available on Metacast 
