When Jacob Hoff and Samantha Greenstone met, they became instant best friends. Then, even though Jacob was gay, they realized that their feelings for each other were evolving beyond the platonic, and they decided to give romance a try. On this episode, Hoff and Greenstone tell Anna Martin, host of “Modern Love,” how their love gave him the courage to come out to his conservative family. They also explain that when they decided to get married, they realized they’d have to get used to clarifying t...
Feb 05, 2025•38 min•Transcript available on Metacast When Robin Eileen Bernstein’s almost-ex-husband, Mark, died of a heart attack, she suddenly found herself comforting her husband’s grieving girlfriend. Robin and Mark had been living apart for two years, but legally she was still the wife, so it was up to her to make the burial arrangements. Would offering to buy the girlfriend an adjoining plot make her feel less alone? On this episode of “Modern Love,” Robin explains how she ended up buying her soon-to-be-ex’s girlfriend a burial plot — and wh...
Jan 29, 2025•33 min•Transcript available on Metacast In a new memoir out next week, the singer-songwriter Neko Case shares some painful childhood memories. In the studio with Anna Martin, Case is open and unapologetically angry as she describes being treated like “an unwanted child.” Both parents, she says, struggled with trauma and addiction. They often left her with no food and only her pets for company. Case also reads a Modern Love essay about the complex heartbreak that comes with being estranged from a parent with an addiction, and the joys ...
Jan 22, 2025•41 min•Transcript available on Metacast Hank Azaria is used to putting on other personalities. You probably know him best from his work as a voice actor on “The Simpsons,” where he plays Moe the bartender, Professor Frink, Chief Wiggum and Snake Jailbird, among many others. His list of credits in stage plays, movies and TV shows is prolific, including roles like his Tony-nominated performance in “Spamalot,” Phoebe’s boyfriend on “Friends” and the dog walker on “Mad About You.” But at a certain point in his life, Azaria realized that h...
Jan 15, 2025•39 min•Ep 374•Transcript available on Metacast When Clare Cory was a young girl, she dreamed of love. But by the time she turned 50, Clare hadn’t found it. Still, she took a look around and found she was happy and was looking forward to the future. Clare fell in love with life. She saw a flower bloom, watched sunlight sparkle on the water and held her cat on her lap. Her heart was full. Then, to her surprise, as Clare faced cancer and was about to turn 60, romance arrived. On today’s episode, Clare explains how she fell in love and began sha...
Jan 08, 2025•41 min•Ep 373•Transcript available on Metacast This week on the “Modern Love” podcast, we’re sharing an episode from another New York Times podcast: “The Daily.” For decades, breast augmentations have been one of the most popular cosmetic surgeries in the United States. But in recent years, a new trend has emerged: the breast reduction. Lisa Miller, who reported the story for The Times, explores why this procedure has become so common with Rachel Abrams, the episode’s host. This episode originally aired Nov. 20, 2024. You can find “ The Dail...
Dec 25, 2024•30 min•Ep 372•Transcript available on Metacast It felt as if the dating world hit a breaking point this year. With news headlines like “ Is Dating a Total Nightmare for You Right Now? ” and “ Why the Young and the Single Can’t Commit to Dating Apps ” appearing frequently, it became clear that there was a lot of pent up frustration. We gave you all the opportunity to let it out, and asked you to send in voice memos about your worst dates. We enlisted the help of the actor Joel Kim Booster, who hosts the podcast Bad Dates , to turn your worst ...
Dec 18, 2024•33 min•Ep 371•Transcript available on Metacast Fake profiles. Unresponsive texters. Boring conversations. An endless stream of dudes on boats holding the fish they’ve caught. Talk to single people using dating apps, and they are likely to tell you that the experience is awful, but that they have to be there. Dating apps are just how singles meet one another these days. But what if artificial intelligence could fix modern dating? The Times reporter Eli Tan explored that hypothesis . Eli joined several new dating apps that seek to duplicate a ...
Dec 11, 2024•34 min•Ep 370•Transcript available on Metacast When Daniel Jones started the Modern Love column in 2004, he called for submissions and hoped the idea would catch on. Twenty years and over a thousand published essays later, Modern Love is a trove of real-life love stories. Jones has put so much of himself into editing the column over the years, but as he tells Anna Martin, the host of the “Modern Love” podcast, the stories shared in the columns have influenced him, too. Today, he talks about three Modern Love essays that have changed the way ...
Dec 04, 2024•35 min•Ep 369•Transcript available on Metacast Townsend Davis had been married for more than a decade when his wife, Bridget, was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. Their lives changed immediately. Townsend became Bridget’s caregiver, sorting her medication day after day, making their home accessible, and finding someone to look after her while he worked and raised their sons. He was committed to Bridget, and wanted to be there for her as her condition progressed. One day, not long after her diagnosis, Bridget told Townsend she ...
Nov 20, 2024•52 min•Ep 368•Transcript available on Metacast When Laura Cathcart Robbins checked into rehab for a severe Ambien addiction, all she could think about was getting out and going home to her two young sons. Laura was also in the middle of a divorce and facing a possible custody battle so she wasn’t looking to make her life more complicated. Laura tells the host Anna Martin about the unexpected bond she formed during the worst 30 days of her life and what happened when she came out the other side. This episode is adapted from Laura’s 2024 essay...
Nov 13, 2024•39 min•Ep 367•Transcript available on Metacast Stories of romantic love are everywhere, but the actor, singer and comedian Bridget Everett says great friendships deserve our time and attention, too. Not just onscreen, but in reality. On the HBO Original series “Somebody Somewhere” (now in its third and final season), Everett stars as Sam, a character inspired by the actor’s own life. She tells Anna about how heartbreaking, hilarious and central platonic friendship is in the fictional world of the show, and in Everett’s own relationships. Eve...
Nov 06, 2024•38 min•Ep 366•Transcript available on Metacast The actress and producer Mayan Lopez has seen a majority of her life play out on television. Her father, the comedian George Lopez, produced and starred in a hit ’90s sitcom based on his real-life relationship with Ann Serrano, Mayan’s mother. But their fictionalized story became a reality when she watched her parents go through a very messy, public divorce. The experience could have shattered the family beyond repair. But more than a decade later, Mayan and her father have turned their painful ...
Oct 30, 2024•28 min•Ep 365•Transcript available on Metacast Madeline de Figueiredo lost her husband, Eli, just a year after they married. After his death, she tried everything she could to reconnect with him: cooking from his recipe book, dancing to playlists he made, watching videos of him and listening to voice mail messages he left her. But her grief persisted. Then, on what was supposed to be Eli’s 27th birthday, Madeline realized she could use A.I. to recreate his voice and try to talk to him again. On this episode of the “Modern Love” podcast, Made...
Oct 23, 2024•33 min•Ep 364•Transcript available on Metacast Whether it’s Cher or Paul Mescal, Amelia Dimoldenberg can turn her “dates” at a fast-food restaurant into chemistry-fueled, revealing interviews. The dates may be fake, but viewers are always left with the impression that the celebrity guest would probably be game for a second one. Amelia reads a Modern Love essay from Rachel Fields, who is not sure how her last date has gone. After sending a risky text message, Rachel’s insecurities cloud her morning routine as she waits for a response. Amelia ...
Oct 16, 2024•2 hr 46 min•Ep 363•Transcript available on Metacast In the new movie “We Live in Time,” the actor Andrew Garfield plays a newly divorced man named Tobias who falls in love with a chef named Almut, played by Florence Pugh. Their story feels epic and expansive, but still intimate. It focuses on the small, everyday moments that make up a love story: washing dishes together after a dinner party, sharing biscuits, smelling fruit at a farmers’ market. These are the moments that sustain them through Almut’s excruciatingly difficult medical crisis. In th...
Oct 09, 2024•50 min•Ep 362•Transcript available on Metacast Courtenay Hameister worked hard to stop feeling shame about her body size, but she also had a cruel inner monologue that just wouldn’t leave her alone. At times, her internalized fatphobia was so powerful, she couldn’t think about romance at all. But when Courtenay started dating Jason, everything felt different. He was fat, too, as well as smart, funny, and handsome. When Courtenay realized she was starting to gain weight again, though, she became obsessed with the idea that other people were j...
Oct 02, 2024•35 min•Ep 361•Transcript available on Metacast On the HBO high finance drama “Industry,” basically everyone serves cruel insults. It’s part of the culture at their bank, Pierpoint. But Myha’la’s character, Harper Stern, goes after friends and enemies with deep, cutting verbal attacks. Myha’la reads a Modern Love essay by a woman with the opposite problem: Laura Pritchett and her husband have avoided conflict for so long, she writes, that the fights they’re not having are tearing them apart. Myha’la also tells the host, Anna Martin, about the...
Sep 25, 2024•30 min•Ep 360•Transcript available on Metacast The actor Gillian Anderson (“The X-Files,” “The Fall,” “Sex Education”) has become an advocate for sexual openness, whether through her on-screen personas, launching a libido-boosting soda brand, attending the Golden Globes in a vulva-embroidered dress or through her new book, “ Want: Sexual Fantasies by Anonymous ,” which showcases the secret fantasies of anonymous women, curated by Ms. Anderson herself. Today, Ms. Anderson reads and discusses the Modern Love essay “ On Tinder, Off Sex ,” which...
Sep 18, 2024•33 min•Ep 359•Transcript available on Metacast Actor Peter Gallagher ( Sex, Lies, & Videotape and The O.C. ) met his wife, Paula Harwood, over forty years ago in college in a stairwell meet-cute. Since then, they’ve maintained a loving marriage and managed to raise a family while navigating the world of show business. We talked to Peter on his 41st wedding anniversary, and he read us the Modern Love essay “Failing in Marriage Does Not Mean Failing at Marriage” by Joe Blair. Despite the essayist being kicked out of the house by his wife five ...
May 22, 2024•30 min•Ep 358•Transcript available on Metacast On the Emmy- and Peabody-winning series “The Bear,” Liza Colón-Zayas plays Tina Marrero, a cook at the Chicago restaurant at the center of the story. Tina and her fellow workers are in a constant struggle for the survival of their restaurant, and they fight just as fiercely with one another. Only at rare moments do we see them drop the tough exterior and show one another love or respect. Today, Colón-Zayas reads “ A Web Between Her Body and Mine ,” by Karen Paul. It’s a Modern Love essay about t...
May 15, 2024•31 min•Ep 357•Transcript available on Metacast John Paul Brammer writes the “¡Hola Papi!” advice column for The Cut at New York magazine, answering questions like, “ Why am I dreaming about sex with a man when I’m a lesbian? ” Or, “ What if my partner judges me for writing smut? ” This candor has given John Paul an intimate connection with his readers. However, as today’s episode reveals, he doesn’t think we necessarily need that level of openness with all of our loved ones. Ahead of Mother’s Day, Brammer reads an essay about a recent colleg...
May 08, 2024•26 min•Ep 356•Transcript available on Metacast Emily Ratajkowski is doing a balancing act many famously beautiful women have to perform. In her 2021 book “My Body,” she reflects on what it’s been like to build a career based on her public image, and her struggle to control that image in an industry largely run by men. Since getting divorced a few years ago, she’s been thinking a lot about gender dynamics and the type of agency she wants to have in dating, too. Today, Ratajkowski reads “ Why I Fell for an ‘I’m the Man’ Man ,” by Susan Forray....
May 01, 2024•30 min•Ep 355•Transcript available on Metacast Laufey, the 25-year-old singer-songwriter, has risen to prominence by taking the trials of today’s dating world — casual relationships, no labels and seemingly endless swiping on apps — and turning them into timeless love songs. Today, Laufey reads Coco Mellors’s essay, “ An Anxious Person Tries to Be Chill ,” which is about a woman trying to work through her deep-seated relationship anxieties and attachment issues in an on-again, off-again situationship. Laufey says she, too, has been an anxiou...
Apr 24, 2024•27 min•Ep 353•Transcript available on Metacast The actor John Magaro is picky about whom he goes to dinner with. Magaro is an adventurous eater. So whether he’s buying offal from the butcher, making stews from the 1800s or falling in love over a plate of rabbit, he says it’s important to him that the people he shares a meal with are willing to be curious. For Magaro, it’s about more than personal preferences. Sharing a meal and connecting with other people, he says, is the bedrock of society. Magaro played Arthur in “Past Lives,” one of our ...
Apr 17, 2024•35 min•Ep 352•Transcript available on Metacast Over the last two decades, Esther Perel has become a world-famous couples therapist by persistently advocating frank conversations about infidelity, sex and intimacy. Today, Perel reads one of the most provocative Modern Love essays ever published: “ What Sleeping With Married Men Taught Me About Infidelity ,” by Karin Jones. In her 2018 essay, Jones wrote about her experience seeking out no-strings-attached flings with married men after her divorce. What she found, to her surprise, was how much...
Apr 10, 2024•28 min•Ep 351•Transcript available on Metacast When Maya Hawke’s famous parents got divorced, she was just a little kid trying to navigate their newly separate worlds. Paparazzi aside, Maya’s experience of shuttling between two homes was still more common than the arrangement described in the essay Maya reads: “ Our Kinder, Gentler, Nobody-Moves-Out Divorce, ” by Jordana Jacobs. By staying under one roof, Jacobs and her ex-husband spared their young son the distress of having to go back and forth. But this “dad upstairs, mom downstairs” arra...
Apr 03, 2024•26 min•Ep 350•Transcript available on Metacast Penn Badgley has made a career out of playing deeply troubled characters. From his role as Joe Goldberg on the Netflix series “You” to Dan Humphrey on “Gossip Girl , ” Badgley has shown many times over how obsession and delusion can destroy love. In his personal life, though, Badgley says he’s not doing too much brooding. He’s a father and a stepfather, and he opens up about the importance of being vulnerable with his kids. Badgley reads “ Watching Them Watching Me ” by Dean E. Murphy, an essay ...
Mar 27, 2024•31 min•Ep 349•Transcript available on Metacast The chef Samin Nosrat lives by the idea that food is love. Her Netflix series, “ Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat, ” and the James Beard Award-winning cookbook that inspired it, were about using food to build community and forge connections. Since then, all of her creative projects and collaborations have focused on inspiring people to cook, and eat, with their friends and loved ones. After the recent loss of her father, Samin has gained an even deeper understanding of what it means to savor a meal — or ev...
Mar 20, 2024•30 min•Ep 348•Transcript available on Metacast Brittany Howard, the five-time Grammy Award-winning singer, makes vibrant, dynamic music about love. As the frontwoman of the band Alabama Shakes, she was celebrated for the power and emotionality of her voice. When she began her solo career in 2019 with “ Jaime ,” an album named after and dedicated to her older sister , who died at 13, Howard revealed new dimensions of her songwriting and herself. Her latest album, “ What Now ,” captures the intensity of processing the past and starting anew. T...
Mar 13, 2024•31 min•Ep 347•Transcript available on Metacast 
