M let me finish. This is the first time I committed a hate crime. Maybe they'll jerk my dick off for something like that. Yeah, probably we've disgusted. I'm associate bath.
Any threship, any trash ship.
You're a worst friend?
Do you want to know why you're all fucked up?
You're looking at the fucking problems you hang around with.
You listen to your worst friend with Shane and Matt. I'm Matt. I'm joined today by my friend and co host, a man who has a chair that he's sitting on. Unfortunately, mine broke yesterday and I'll tell you all about it.
Shane, was it embarrassing when your chair broke?
No, thankfully not. I have this computer chair, which it's so weird. On Friday, my manager for my day job was like, you know, we have a credit you can use if you need any office supplies. I go, oh, cool, like pens or anything like that. She goes, it's whatever you want to spend up to three hundred dollars, I said. I looked at my chair at the time it was like slightly leaning sideways, and I was like, could I get an office chair with that? She goes, yeah, that
would be fine. That'd be great. So now I'm looking for like five hundred dollars office chairs on sale for three hundred so I can fucking you know, not scam my job. They're paying for it, but fucking you know, I want to get something.
Yeah, you wouldn't just.
Get a good deal on your job, that's all. Why's everything got to be a fucking scam with you?
Dude?
Stop scamming people. Just say it's a good deal for everyone.
Patreon dot com slash worst friend Cast, it's a good deal for everyone. Go to patreon dot com slash worst friend cast sign up. It's a dollar a month, get access to everything I ever recorded, entirely commercial free, and a bonus episode every week links to everything at your worst friend dot com.
That sounds like a good deal for everyone.
It's a good deal for a good deal for everyone. Uh yeah, yeah, yeah, So my chair. I went to go sit on it, but I like, it's been wonky the last few x amount of times. There were a few interviews I did for this stretch of going Deeper where I was sitting on the chair and I would feel it like and I'm like, oh, if this, let me tell you the reaction of a porn stars screaming as this fucking chair impaled me. If that were to have happened, I would have been the coolest thing ever.
But who would have been there to post it? Because you would have been impaled like a Vlad the Impaler victim.
Jen's always wanted to go viral, so I'm sure she would find a way. Yeah, he didn't hit save, Yeah exactly. But yeah, the fucking if you know, like a computer or like a desk chair, it's got the metal part at the bottom. I can't send you a picture part. Yeah, but it is fucking fully I'm gonna text it Tee, even though I know you're recording on this. The metal just fucking totally gave.
Out and cracked on it.
It's old.
Yeah, I had I had an office chair in here that was like yard sale material and it was like missing a wheel. I think when I was drinking, I like swung it across the house and smashed it and broke a second wheel.
Off of it.
And it was always leaning at a weird angle, like in the angle it leaned at was the opposite that the wheels were at, So you would constantly like you would just wobble back and forth. And I finally threw that away a few months ago, and I got this this other like Salvation Army type chair, but it's got all.
The wheels and everything. Where it was like a ten dollars chair.
This jen's got a fucking computer share. We got from Goodwill, Like you know, as long as you who gives a fuck? I get all kinds of furniture from Goodwill. Who cares?
I don't. I buy socks there.
I like when they come with bonus cockera jags inside.
That's not like yeah, because then you can plant them in the backyard and crows.
Or I can go to a friend's house and put them behind the toilet, see.
Or you can crack them in your skillet. Make a roadj egg Omelet Larva Omelet.
All right, first video I got here for you today. The World Series is set. It is going to be. The teams are all determined. Who's gonna play in the World Series.
It's two teams, right, It's just two.
Yeah, though if you tried to do three, it might be kind of interesting, you know.
That'd be cool if they had to compete ball, like they had to like fight it out for who was gonna pitch each round.
I don't know why people don't make more beast basketball style games.
Oh, like where you cross a sport with another sport.
Take a ball and like make your own court and do something with it, or make your own field or whatever you want to do.
Oh dude, what if they mix like NASCAR and UFC.
Some guy kind of fist by the car as it's coming at him.
Oh, I was thinking, like all the cars go around the track, but instead of like getting to the first place or whatever, they just crashed into each other at two and ten miles an hour.
You know, Yeah, I mean that's one way of looking at it. Jen's dad was a big, big, big intimidator day Ironheart fan.
Okay?
Is that is that a that sounds like a badge of honor you wear in low circles.
It's it's a badge of an honor in low circles. Like, you know, I'm an Earnhart guy, but I assume most of them are Earnhart guys. He's kind of like a Babe Ruth and he was killed at Daytona, their biggest race of the year, right was he shot there? It's almost like Babe Ruth came up at the bottom of the ninth with two ounces and the bases loaded down by three, and the ball came in and hit him
in the helmet and he died at the bleet. You know, his fucking neck broke because the ball came in at two hundred miles an hour and took his fucking head off. That's how Dale Earnhardt died.
Bas So, was it was it like the end of Dale's career? Was he getting ready to retire? Doesn't his kid race?
His kid not only raced, raced a full career and then I believe he retired as well.
Retired like crashed at an hour.
No, No, he didn't have a Dale retirement and he had a regular one.
Okay, but it's always sad when then when a boy doesn't follow in the in the father's father.
Yeah yeah, well you know, I'm sure your dad feels that same way, right.
Oh yeah, he just he would just love it if I worked my life away in a retail establishment and then nutted a kid into an immigrant at sixty.
Uh So.
The World Series is literally what everyone in baseball hoped it would be. Meaning like from a TV standpoint, in.
The best Teams, I know what that means.
What's it mean?
It's the Yankees and the Red Sox.
No, they're in the same league America.
Dude, I thought they were like rivals. I thought there are.
Let me, let me give you a hint. So why would that be a better one Yankees and Red Sox than another one?
I don't know, racial diversity, It wouldn't.
I mean it would because it's a good rivalry. But the thing is, that's all East Coast, right, so you're just losing half of the country. So the Yankees are in the World Series, and who would the other team be, Oh, the Oakland A's No, they're actually one of the worst teams in baseball. They're they're I think probably second worst team. Not only that, they've lost their home and they'll move in to your backyard this year. I think they're playing
for They don't even have a field right now. They're playing in like random fields over the next couple of years. And they're moving to Vegas in twenty twenty six, maybe something like that.
It's a team and a custody to spare.
It's not good. It is the New York Yankees against the Los Angeles Dodgers.
Oh wow, Okay, so you got one shithole versus the other one.
It's a combined about five hundred million dollars in payroll this year, which is there's no cap in baseball, so you can spend as much money as you want to spend. So there's a lot of big name, big market teams buying players and this and that buying them on the market is as strung as his back. How many mule power does that person have?
Is that really how they measure him?
Yeah, that's how free agency works. That's how the combine works. They go in, they can check the teeth. Oh yeah, this guy could play quarterback for me. Look he's got good teeth.
Have you been watching the Yeah, look at his skull shape.
Skull shape he'll be. He'll be a great linebacker and a horrendous.
What are back? Have you watched the Hernandez Show on FX?
No, dude, I did. I did the Menandez. I like, I'm over Ryan Murphy, but he's rekindling my love because I enjoyed the second half of American Horror Stories.
Oh, I haven't watched the new one yet.
They just came out, I think like over the weekend. Something like that. But we watched four or five of them over the weekend while I was cleaning shit up, and uh yeah, they were good. They were all really decent. So but I watched Menandez. I did not watch the Aaron Hernandez. I don't need a football story told by some of the fruitiest dudes in Hollywood.
Well just check it out. Okay, Yeah, it's there's a lot. There's so much gay shit every episode. There's a lot of gay shit.
And I know that none of that is substantiated, it's all hearsay. But but aside from that, the show is so interesting to me. What I'm really getting the most enjoyment out of for this show is the stuff like that behind the scenes stuff that you probably know all about, like but I've never been exposed to it because I'm
not a sports guy. But it's like how there's like like when he's in college playing for the Gators, there's like lawyers for the team, like watching out for the students, making sure they don't get in trouble, bailing them out like so you know, like keeping them off of police blotterers.
And then when they go pro, like the interview process when they're getting drafted and like how they how it's like you're it's like an audition, and it's like and then once they're on the team, like how the team functions and and like how they they like it's it reminded me of the Marine Corps, where like when we were when we would go on a deployment or something, they would have to yell at us for two hours beforehand about local customs and how we represent the Marine
Corps and how you know, and it's like they're doing the same thing.
It's all.
It's like they have the best minds, the most highest paid skilled like psychologists working to kind of steer the players, you know, so that way, like there's a team mentality and they they look out for each other, they keep
each other from getting in trouble. All this shit that like I kind of could have guessed some of it was going on, But to see like how deep the NFL and the college football leagues get into these people's personal lives and how they get in trouble and all that shit, I thought it was just fa oh and their their psychology.
I thought it was fucking awesome. Yeah, you should check it out, you Okay. The problem I have with it is every clip I've seen. The athletics of it look so unbelievable. It would be like if we did a space movie for you to enjoy. You're like, oh, I love space movies.
And in the background lucasfilm took his nineteen seventies stuff and had fucking you know, wrong planets hanging behind it. This is our solar system and there's fifteen planets out there, full size planets. You'd be like, even if the story was engrossing and great, you'd still be like, come on, motherfucker, just get the little details right.
Sure.
Yeah, Kenny Powers was bad at that too. Fucking what's his name? Danny McBride cannot throw a baseball, for shit. He throws it like a theater kid throws a baseball, which he is a theater kid. He probably yeah, yeah, you said one thing in there. And I wonder if they incorporated this story into the Aaron Hernandez story, huh, because it's like the most famous one from the Draft in this sense, but it was not Aaron Hernandez, So I'm wondering if they kind of what is it compiled
those type of things. There was one NFL team that would come in and go Hey, Shane, nice to meet you. You know you want to be drafted by us. We're just gonna run through some questions here. What do you think of when a quarterback? Blah blah blah? What do you think about? This is your mama hooker?
Like?
Has she ever been a prostitute?
Like?
Has your mother ever been a whore on the streets?
Like?
Yeah, And the whole point of that at the time, which they've dialed that back a lot. They don't let that kind of shit anymore. It's to see how you react to pressure, or to awkward situations or to whatever. So was that and there or was it something else?
Yeah, that's kind of like his agent or whoever is like when they're prepping him for the draft and for interviews and shit, that's what they that's how they kind of train him up. And Yeah, there is a scene where it's like, so are you a homo? Are you a queer? And he's like, why the fuck would you ever think that? Just because I sucked the guy's dick in the car last.
Night and then shot him in the eye. Yeah, it fucking that one. There's a you might like it after you watch the Hernandez Show. I don't know. There's a like a one hour, hour and a half thirty for thirty or ESPN films whatever they call them. I think it's called swamp You And it's all about those Florida teams had like fucking criminals on them. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but they were led by Tim Tebow, the holiest man to work walk the earth since whoever.
You know, right, that's a big that's a subplot in this show. Tebow's in there. And yeah, like the the fucking coach of that team.
Or whoever is Ervan Meyer.
H yeah, he keeps getting like castigated by the staff of the school, like, hey, why do we have all these fucking kids on your team who are in so much trouble? Why aren't you kicking them off the team? They should be expelled at this and that, and the guys like, put my team. I'm gonna have the best fucking team ever. It's gonna be the best team.
So so it's a real strange dichotomy the way college football works and shit like that, where yes, you have these people who are student athletes, and student comes first for a reason, we're giving them a degree, and we want you to have the best blah, blah blah blah blah. Most of them get like basically the same degree I have, like communications or film or any of that. They get a lot of yeah something homework. Were you tons of homework, by the way, but it was like editing videos and shit.
But yes, no real homework.
That's got it.
Uh, most of them get that kind of shit like you said about the lawyers and this and that a lot of them will keep them out of trouble. Now, you wouldn't normally do that for a student. I wouldn't think if they were in any kind of serious trouble. But then when you look at it, Urban Meyer, the head coach of that team, right, goes from that job
to potentially something else where. If he wins at Florida, he goes onto an NFL job where he's making twelve million dollars a year and he's maybe making three over here. So he's winning important to you? Then fuck yes, it's important to me. I'm trying to win. This guy may have possibly killed somebody out of a club the other night, Yeah, but he catches the shit out of the ball. Get that motherfucker on the field. I get it, I get it. I get it from everyone's perspective, yehiger Aaron Hernandez.
Is Oh no, I get it from his especially because like who hasn't sucked a gun and wanted to shoot him in the head afterwards from.
Guilt to me? Uh so I get that, But no, I have not watched that show. I just I watched The Menendez Ones and I'm I'm a little uh, I'm tapped for a little bit on Ryan Murphy after you know, No, I get you. I can't go back and finish that Kim Kardashian season. I think it was really bad the first half I watched.
Oh yeah, that one sucked.
I think the writers strike fucking like put a stop to it or something, or like they stopped midway through the season.
I think, right, did they You don't think they did.
I'm pretty sure they did. Let's see. I am dB. I'll check the release dates of them American arm Story anyway. Well, I'm looking this up. Uh.
Just leave him in fucking suspense, dude, don't say any anyways or any Just fucking let them, let them hold.
You don't have to be combative with the audience.
They just feel like sometimes I feel like they're trying to hate crime me.
Yeah. Look see September. Oh am I sharing? Yeah, yeah, I see it, September, September, October, October, October, April, April, okay, April. Yeah. So but they finished, Yeah, they did finish. I just never went back to it.
Oh okay, So I bet it sucks when it finishes.
I mean I didn't finish the last season.
I don't think it started to They.
All suck anyway. Wait, baseball team's in. So it's the Yankees and the Dodgers. My wife can name every baseball team. If you give her a city, I could name probably six teams. Could you really? How many do you actually think you can name? Let's go through them real quick.
How many are there?
Yankees and Dodgers. There's either thirty or thirty two. I think it's I.
Wouldn't have guessed Dodgers really. If you hadn't, I just said it now, So yeah, okay, Yankees.
Dodgers, Red Sox, White Sox, Indians, Nope, Guardian Okay, so I take that off the table. Then, okay, give me a second.
Oakland A's where do what major cities do we live near?
Philid? Oh, the Phillies. Okay, another New York team Mets. Okay, aren't there teams from Canada?
They're Toronto Blue Jays and there used to be the Montreal Expos and they went to Washington. Washington Nationals.
They are I was gonna say the Maple Leafs, but that's hockey.
Yeah it is hockey, but at least you know it. That's Toronto. Yeah, there you go.
All right.
Well, I have a video of some people who are cognitively better than you, better than me as well, naming baseball teams. And I don't know if it's funny or not. I just like it. The Phillies are the Bells.
Why because it's because they have a their logo.
So you got to think about it in the mind of a dummy. We're going visual first, and the first thing I see is what I shouted out, like when I'm like ohm, on's when we come on zoom and I'm looking at you, and it just comes to my mind it's because I'm retarded.
The Kimbers.
Yeah, you know what, this bit stinks. I don't like this one.
Yeah, I don't understand what is the Kimbers.
You really need to see the video because these dummies I ain't made for broadcasting. It said KC. So it's the Kimbers. I'll put the link in the episode of description. I feel like I'm talking to a fucking three year old. All right, well, then I have a better video for you.
Here's a guy Tom.
I'm gonna be showing you how to make a piss bomb.
So you.
Couldn't find the tutorial for it, right, So I found it for you.
I knew how to make a ship bomb, but I've been wanting to know how to make a piss bomb ever.
Okay, So this is the dirtiest counter I've ever seen, I believe so. Yeah, and upon it is the most vile, filthy, fucking microwave I've ever seen.
Yeah, it's like the counter has mold on top of like a some sort of secretion, like some sort of bodily fluid has molded over on this counter.
It almost looks like it developed a yeast to begin with, a bread grew from it. And this is the penicillin on top of the bread. There's layers to this filth. You've got the poison and the cure in the same spot. All right, let's say the rest because I gotta no set it.
To ten seconds, and if you have a bag of piss like I do right here.
You're just gonna want to put it in there? Isn't it kind of just melt the bag?
Uh?
No, I think because it heats up the liquid right.
Right, put the liquid's in the bag. Wouldn't if you put hot liquid in there, wouldn't it melt the bag?
No, it would boil and then probably pop from being condensed.
But not all plastic is microwave safe. And I don't think this white fucking deli bag that this guy got his microwave safe.
Well, I guess we'll see what happens.
Put it in there, shut tie it off, And I gotta be honest with you. Didn't going to be a one hundred yes, one hundred percent. I did not at all. This is white guy behavior.
Yeah, oh dude, this is white boy behavior. Yeah really, step yeah.
Yes yeah yeah. And I also didn't expect him to have hobbit fingernails as well, but he does.
Oh man, is that toasting a BOSSI dude, I listened to this band Animals as leaders, and they're guitar player.
It's kind of them.
Yeah, it's kind of like a joke. His thumb is bent like that and like it he plays with the thumb. It's called thumping, okay, And I think based on the thumb alone where you pause this video, I think I'm watching.
A guitar legend Mike wave a bag a piss.
Let me ask you, stump. Is that like when you would do it with bass, like with less claypool or no kind of but you're that's not it.
It's kind of like that, but you're using the thumb in a picking motion, so like up and down instead of like slapping.
Uh oh, slap is what I was thinking of, like slap bass.
Yeah, oh yeah, sorry, yeah.
But it's it's a technique developed by dude that I'm talking about toasting a BOSSI And again his thumb is all jagged and crooked, just like this guy. It's like it's a joke in the guitar world where it's like anybody could thump if my thumb was a j you know, but I'm pretty sure this is a guitar virtuoso boiling piss in front of us. And then once the ten seconds are over, you're gonna want to take the bag out and then tie it up.
And you know, fucking throw it at someone. I don't know what a guy. No, that's not how you make a bomb of anything. I don't think I don't like that.
There's a hole in the bag already, it's leaking out.
Yeah, that's a problem. I don't think he. I think he should have double bagged that piss bomb.
You know what you could do. You could fill multiple bags of piss, throw them in the microwave, right, heat it up a lot, unplug the microwave and throw the microwave onto someone's car. It'll bust open, smash the windshield and cover everything in piss.
That's that's a way to really get That's a revenge right there.
That's a punishment right there, Like we're talking about.
Killing your kids is to punish your wife, you know, sure, kind of kind of the car equivalent.
Like how they didn't hear us talk about that. It just sounds like something you brought up, you know, killing your kid to fucking make your wife angry just because she ain't like the color you painted your room.
You know what I mean. I'll figure it out from context. Shive him enough time.
But you know this, this does remind me of when I was in the Marines in the sky stank Dick short for Stanowitz. Okay, obviously, Yeah, he made a ship bomb where.
There was this guy. He was gone.
He got fapped out before fapping was jerking off in the Marines. FAP f A P was a oh my god, I forget what it stood for, but it's when you got temporarily assigned to another duty station or another job. So I got I got fapped out to the tax center and I did taxes for six months.
Family Advocacy program.
I don't think SOAP.
Stands for a family advocate advocacy program in the Marines, and can refer to either a program to address abuse and neglect or a program to temporarily assign military personnel.
Well that's probably like something there we go fleet.
Sorry, there's two on there. Okay, okay, sorry.
Yeah, so that's that's what it is. Yeah, you get sent to another place to work. And this guy got fapped out to cam Pendleton. You got sent there for
I don't know a couple of months. And so stank Dick one night broke into his room, probably through the bathroom because the room it was like dorms where the bedrooms would share a single bathroom, and he went in there and he shit on the microwave plate, and then he stuck it in the microwave, and then he set the timer real high, I'm assuming like, and he hit start and then he left. And I don't know all the inner workings of the bomb itself, but when the guy came back, he was.
Like, oh my god, it's stinks in here. And he opened his microwave and there was a shit exploded all over the place.
Didn't Bland Drew's dad or my exes dad get booted out of the Air Force for blowing up a microwave or something?
Did he? I don't know.
I think my ex is dad, my high school girlfriend's dad got kicked out of the Air Force. He lives in a trailer now. He might be dead for all I know.
But I've noticed anybody who's been anybody who got kicked out of the military, or to a lesser extent, any anybody. Okay, so I'll lead with this, anybody who got kicked out of the military. Yes, they're generally like a garbage person, just their whole life. You'll you'll, even if they're nice or whatever, you'll notice after a while and knowing them, like, oh, they're kind of just like they're like a person with fleas.
You know, Okay, that's a great that is a you look at them, you still identify them as species human, and then the interaction with them is like you might as well be talking to a dog with fleas, Like they're just they have all these fucking problems that they can. I've had fleas before, so you know, ooh yeah, well not long term. I didn't take them home with me.
I'm gonna look at you in a new light now.
They all jumped into my prepubescent barely. They're like hairs when I was a kid. I feel disturbed before when we had the fire, the problem with the house fire.
Oh yeah, you said the water day they soak everything even if there's no fire in an area.
They're like, well, we don't want there to ever be any fire there, so let's just put all the fucking water on earth. And uh yeah, do that when you're backed up near the water like we were, and with like there's some woodsy area over there, oh humidity, and yeah, you're just walking around and you're feeling them like grab legs and you're like picking them off.
They're wed. Damn it, that's disgusting.
This guy come over, this guy was fapping off or something. Right, Oh yeah, so so, oh wait, you told it garbage people?
Oh ohay, so the other kind of garbage person you can You can tell a lot by people's military background, right. So it's like somebody can say like, oh, yeah, I served four years and I got out honorable discharge, and they can still be a piece of shit. Absolutely, chances are just way less for for that person then for the person who tells you, oh, yeah, I I did get I went to the military, but I couldn't finish
basic I got hurt. And it's like, okay, But because here's the thing, at least in the Marine Corps, they've already invested so much money in you being there. They want you to finish recruit training, and unless you absolutely can't adapt, like they don't, that's that's the only time they don't want you there. Like they can usually weed out people who are like just not going to adapt right, mentally unfit, like they're just pussy's or their cry babies or whatever it is.
They're usually good at.
Figuring those people out and separating them relatively quickly. But then there's people who are just not motivated, people who get hurt, but they can heal those people. They will get through recruit training. Even if it takes all four years of your enlistment, You'll get through recruit training. They'll
they'll just keep you there if you get hurt. You know, so if someone tells you, oh, yeah, I got hurt in boot camp and they don't allow bright and that's the reason they got out of the military, that should be kind.
Of a red flag. Right.
I see, you're taking it even more stern, which I think is totally fair. You went through it. You're taking it more stern than I was, like, Uh, we interviewed. Remember Mike Rainey was at Paris Island, right and he couldn't finish. Seemed like a good dude. Now I was gonna say, my Rainey's in a scumbag. He's not. But he did write a book about how he had a perk addiction.
So so I mean he come back.
Shit, he cleaned himself up. I mean, good for him. But yes, at some point I agree. I thought you were gonna say, once you're in, okay, the people who finish out their term whatever you want to call what would you call it, you're enlistenment, You're enlistment. I apologize, Uh, once you finish out your enlistment, right, I would just say a crazy number out there. Eighty percent of them turn out to be quote unquote good people. Twenty percent of them maybe are still dirt bags afterwards. I would
wonder if it's the inverse. Let me just say this.
Just I would say, now, just seventy twenty ten, and then there's that that ten percent of the guys who killed their wives and kids and drop them in the oil tankers.
We'll see. I kind of put that in the large the loser portion, but you're going even deeper. So say it was seventy thirty, right, I would say the inverse of that is if for some reason you got kicked out halfway through, thirty percent of those people turn out to be like decent human beings. Blah blah blah. Seventy percent are probably writing books about their perk addiction, but not actually writing the book, just kind of thinking about it. Yeah.
Yeah, they're just narrating the book every day themselves in.
A flophouse surrounded by guys with needles in their arms.
Yeah, And there I was offenders.
There, I was heating up a big bag of shit for ninety nine minutes on microwave.
Damn.
Yeah, I knew a bunch of pieces of shit, man, who got discharge?
You want to statement, I knew a bunch of pieces of shit. Actually, well, here's the thing.
I knew a bunch of pieces of shit who got like bad discharges. Right, So some people I knew serve their whole enlistments and then they got bad conduct discharge other than honorable. And these these are people who went to the brig, you know, for like smoking math and breaking laws like okay.
So they knew there was a chance they were gonna be fucked. It's at the end. It's not like it's not like your boss was telling you every day, hey, you're doing a really good job. You're a really good job. Then when it came to time to the end, he was like unsatisfactory work. But it's never like that, right, you know you're gonna get fucked at the end.
Right, Yeah.
So it's like finishing your full enlistment and getting a discharge, any kind of discharge in most cases I think is kind of better than the people who say, oh yeah I was I was in but they like there's some people like okay, I knew this guy, Alexander, that was his last name, and he ran, he was he was, He did all the training for Iraq. And then it was like a week before the deployment and he was running and he fell face first into a fence and his fucking spine broke.
Right.
Yeah, the Marine Corps paid for all his medical procedures. They fixed him up. He healed right, but then he was deemed unfit to go back to full duty. So he served the rest of his enlistment on light duty. He stayed in our unit, did an administrative job. He wasn't allowed to pete, but he'd stayed in work. Like that's the thing is, like they've invested something in you by training you, by giving you a schooling and a
job and an assignment. So it's like the fact that he was broken physically didn't make him not able to be a marine, right, So when he was discharged, he got an honorable discharge under medical conditions. Right, So it's like still an honorable discharge, but he's got this medical thing on there to let the VA know, because the VA is separate from all the branches, to let the VA know, like, hey, this guy is fucked up.
Don't hassle him with his claims for disability, you know. So there's that.
And then I knew another guy, Lorenzen, same deployment as Alexander. In the training, he got run over by a humvee, broke broke his hips and is like part of his back.
Right, both of his hips.
Yeah, oh nasty, huh how do you fuck?
Probably stiffly from the bottom, yeah, probably laying thrown in a lot of pain, okay, But he he healed up and he went on our he went on that deployment.
I went on.
I was in Iraq with him, So it's like he healed in a year and a half and then deployed, you know. So it's like it really depends on the person how well you heal all this stuff. But the the Marine Corps is not just going to throw you out because you got hurt. So anybody saying like, oh I got hurt and they threw me out, are they separated me? It's like what did you get your head cut off?
Like what happened? You know?
Let me ask from your perspective and look, yes, all heroes, they all went through it. Blah blah blah. Which of the who do you consider a pussy of all the guys you laid out, oh man, not individually, but okay, all right, tell me, man, maybe I did mention the guys who can't adapt.
Right.
So it's like I get that we're all individuals, and I get that we're all machines, and some people are more broken than other machines. So it's like I get that some people just aren't right for the military, but some people warm their way through recruit training and then they make it to the Fleet Marine Force and they are absolute dirtbags. I knew this guy Boswell, who unbeknownst
to me, had a pill addiction. He got hurt too, and he was taking vicotin and then he was like he was taken too much and then I think he started buying it illicitly. But he was such a fuck liar, dude. He was such a conniving liar about everything he like, I think he got busted stealing someone else's pills, like
red handed, taking someone's medication. And then when I think I had to drive him back and forth one day for a court hearing, Well, you get you get duty every month, and part of your duty is like.
I get duty every day.
I get duty every night before bed.
Yeah, one of your jobs on duty is like, hey, if someone needs a ride to another part of the base, you take them. And so yeah, I had to take this guy to court and I was like, man, I, so what are you They going to kick you out? Like, and he's like, dude, it's so fucked up.
I think.
I think that Vazquez is trying to frame me. I would never take his medicine. And it's like, dude, a lot of people saw you take in the medicine.
You know.
It's like, it's it's a weird thing to try and lie to me about in this car.
Like a lot of people saw you take it.
This isn't so much an OJ thing as it is a you know, much more Kyle rich in house type right, Like it's on tape. We know we've seen it. I uh no, okay. So so not to.
Direct those dirt bags, but the ones who who couldn't adapt, h let me let me correct you.
That's a dirt bag, that's a scumbag, that's whatever. Who's a pussy.
Oh a pussy man. Some of the pussiest guys you would ever see end up being really tough. There's this little little guy named Milosh.
You've mentioned him.
He must have weighed one hundred and ten pounds. He was just like string beans. And they made him a sawgunner. The saw is like double the weight of an M sixteen. Sure, so they made him the heavy machine gunner basically for for a squad, not mine. But yeah, he just like bore it. You know, you just gritted his teeth and he didn't complain ever. Just a tough little kid, okay, Like all right, But then there's the Yeah, then there's people who are like I think I've mentioned this guy before,
Kimberly and this this is the most pussiest ship. So I crashed Kimberly's car one one time, right.
Okay, this is the most pussiest shit. He told me. I gotta fucking pay for it. It's like, hey, wait a minute, is this the car you crashed in the desert?
Yes? Yeah, okay, go ahead, So okay, I'm I'm putting him in a sympathetic light to start, just just to try and just to tilt the scales in his favor, because so if you see, if you find this as pussy as I did, so he was the.
Kind of guy like, okay, he he was the guide in boot camp. That's what everybody knew him as. Like before before someone shows up to your unit when you're in the Marines, there are people are already talking about him. It's like, hey, we got a new motor t guy coming. I heard he was the guide of his platoon in boot camp. The guide is the leader that the drill instructors assigned for the whole platoon.
So can I ask you, is that the most qualified guy for that? Or can that also be like a guy who they see potentially in but doesn't have it, so hey let me this guy, Okay, Okay.
Yeah, it can be like a spiteful thing like, oh, if you guys aren't going to train, then I'll make so and so the shittiest recruit. You're the guide, now, all right, march them around guide, you know, like, you know, just just to make you feel stupid. They can change the role of the guide, you know. But yeah, the assumption would be like if somebody was the guide for the whole time they were in boot camp, they're gonna be a good marine. That would be the assumption. Yeah,
But Kimberly was not. That he got in trouble quite a bit, and I felt for him. I felt bad every time he would get in trouble because I crashed his car.
Like the weekend he got to our unit, I was like, hey, new guy, let me borrow your car so I can go fuck this chicken Vegas.
And I went to Vegas, but she wasn't putting out that weekend, so we just laid in bed and cuddled and.
Yeah.
Yeah. So then at four am, I was like, oh, I think I should drive back to the little of California right now. So I did that, and I fell asleep and I crashed the car, and then I took it back to base. I drove all the way back on a flat tire, like bent the rim in on itself and shit, and uh yeah, I drove like sixteen I was like sixteen miles away from the base when I fucking fell asleep and crash. I couldn't make it
another sixteen minutes. You fell asleep, Yeah, dude, come on, it was like it's four in the morning when I left, and I had to cuddle the whole time. I didn't get any pussy or nothing.
But okay, how'd you craate? Is this when you moved a rock?
Yeah? I had to move a boulder to get it out from the sand.
See I always picture it being a comically large boulder, bigger than the car.
It's oh no, dude, it's it was like comically large to the point where it's like, I bet a person could lift that if they were training for strongman competition for thirty years, you know. But yeah, so I always felt bad, like kind of like, well, maybe Kimberly wouldn't always be getting in trouble and fucking up and causing so many problems for other Marines if I hadn't crashed his car. Yeah you think I see now that he
was just a piece of shit marine. Oh okay, but yeah, And the confirmation of this came a.
Couple of weeks before we deployed.
People will get drunk. There was this one guy, Vasquez, who would get drunk and cry.
All the time.
I heard he's tried to frame people.
He did. He was a framer. No, No, what's.
Funny is Vasquez walked in on me and my roommates stealing beer out of his fridge once and we convinced him we weren't. So it's like, Kimberly, what were you doing? Or a bos well, what were you doing? It would have been so easy, It would have been so easy to just be like, no, no, no, I was taking your pills.
I know I was putting some back.
This is a simple thing. You're sucking up here, buddy, Okay, just tell him it wasn't you, even though they were in your hand. And he's dumb enough to believe it, all right. Tell me about Vasquez.
No, he would cry all the time, so he'd get drunk, and he was all the time.
Okay.
But he had seen some the guys who went on the deployment before us and then went with us again. I always kind of like, I didn't like, I didn't want to assume too much with any of them, right like, because they all had different reactions.
I had talked to him before about Dobson and Thompson.
One guy killed a farmer, innocent, and then it haunted him forever. Other dude killed a fourteen year old girl, just ran out in the street, and he's like, wrong place, shouldn't have been there. You know, she was in front of my gun, you know, what the fuck?
Yeah?
And then like maybe he's different now, I don't know, But Vazquez, I don't know he had seen some stuff. I think everybody on that first deployment had seen definitely more combat anything than I did. Like they they saw like one of the guys, corporal Corporal Moreno.
He came back.
Uh So all the guys came back from Iraq and then Moreno came back months later.
And everyone's like, Moreno's coming back. Moreno.
I was like, who the fuck is that. They're like, he got blown up when we were in Iraq. He's been in the hospital, so like, yeah, he had like concussive head trauma, he lost his hearing. He was all fucked up.
What if everyone was so excited, They're like, Moreno's coming back. It's gonna be awesome. Moreno was the coolest dude ever. He was great. And all you guys are lined up at the fucking hanger waiting for the plane to land. Oh my god, Moreno, and you're you don't know who Moreno is, You have no idea Moreno. Oh my god, this guy sounds so awesome. Everyone's got all these great stories. You're one time he tricked a new recruiting no fucking wars.
You know, Moreno bank six chicks at a party. One time and we all busting in the door, and he told us keep watching, it makes me fuck better. Moreno rules, And then the fucking plane lands right in front of you guys somehow quickly, very you know fast.
It's a one of those harriers where it lands vertically.
And the back hatch open and there is moreno coming out in his casket.
Oh yeah, I mean he was basically just a human casket. You know, he didn't have much personality. He was just kind of a shell most of the time.
Oh, I had the wrong impression on Moreno then.
Yeah, I know I couldn't hear. Yeah, he wasn't they. I think they were just excited because they were like, oh man, we get to see if his head's still on. They won the bets on it.
They wanted to see the damage.
Okay, yeah, but first so yeah, I knew these guys saw some shit. But Vasquez would cry and he would like it was like always kind of vague what he was crying about.
Thompson and Dobson, Well, Dobson didn't cry. He was a machine. But Thompson when he cried, like it was like, I can't believe I killed an innocent farmer. Man, I saw his kids and his children. I can't believe that I shot him right and I shot him in the chest and the bullet came out his mouth. I can't believe it. I can't believe I did that to him. Like we knew what he was crying about, you know. But Vasquez would be.
Like, oh, dude, I can't believe what happened over there, and be like, what happened Basquez?
And he'd be like, I don't want to talk about it, and it's like you're crying about it, why don't you talk about it? He's like, no, it was so bad.
And then you ask people like what did Vasquez do? And I reckon, they'd be like, shit, he sat in the MWR and ate pizza.
You know, this pizza is so bad. I hate it.
So I had flashbacks about how fucking raw the pepperonis would come out.
I couldn't get him to crisp no matter what I did.
I wanted a Hawaiian with pineapple and ham and they only had bacon and it's like technically still pork, but it was too salty.
I hate the salt. It's bad for my head.
Yeah, so, Kimberly, piece of shit he did this thing right before we deployed. And mind you, I got I joined the Marines before him, got to the unit.
Before him, I engaged in scuttle butt about him beforehand. He was the guide Hoha, little nerd. He called his mom a few weeks before we deployed and he started crying and he was like, Mom, I got to tell you something. I don't know what this specific.
I don't know if he said he was Special Forces or what, but he told his mom that he had deployed already.
He's like he had said.
Yeah, I'm going to Iraq, but I've already been there and I've killed people and I'm so scared to go back, mom. And I think he came from the South. I think he was from Alabama, and they were like a real patriotic family, and I think his mom was on the other end, like you.
Better go over there and do your country proud and all this and that's and yeah, he told her, He's like, Mom, I already went there and killed all these people and it was so fucked up and I can't go back. And that always just like stuck with me, as like, man, that is the fucking gayest shit you could do, Like not homosexual in no way. Home. It's just some fucking dirty gay shit, you know, get it out of our schools type of shit.
Funny because this video kind of covers exactly what you're talking about. This is that South Park clip was trending the other day. Do you remember this one?
Share your screen?
Yeah, I'm gonna do that right now. He trying to understand this.
How is it that you boys think referring to gay people as fags and today's world is acceptable because we're not referring to gay people.
You can be gay and not be a fag. Yeah, a lot of fags aren't gay. I happen to be gay. Boys, Do you think I'm a fag?
Do you write a big, loud Harley and go up and down the streets ruining everyone's nice time?
No, then you're not a fag. So what if a guy is gay and rides a Harley, then he's a gay fag? I mean, is this really just hard? I don't know?
All right, Look, you're driving in your car, okay, and you're waiting to make a left at a traffic signal. The light turns yellow, should be your turn to go, but the traffic coming at you just keeps coming. And even when the light turns red, a guy in a BMW runs the red light so you can't make your left turn.
What goes through your mind? Fag bag? Right, yeah, he's fine with it.
Homosexual, You're thinking, Oh, he's an inconsiderate douche bag, like a Harley rider. This, this is making insanely good sense trying.
I hate Harley riders.
We've been having lately, and I don't want to put it on one specific hype of person or anything like that. We've been having crazy Puerto Ricans at the quick check where it's three in the morning and they're racing motorcycles up the street next to the SFS REV and just those big like fucking turbo exhausts or whatever it is all night, two in the morning, three in the morning.
Get shock. I have these you know, those like silly little fucking poppers you throw down right, Oh yeah, I got these big boy ones that are like a fucking small state a dynamite that sound like a gunshot. They sound like a solid gun shot. So I'm just gonna wait till they're all in that parking lot one day, because six of them at once the back. Yeah, the backyard is up to that. I want to just start throwing them over there and scaring people away.
Hell yeah, dude.
And then you take a real gun and you shoot it through the fence. Well, you're you're testing like the rendering, you know, to see how well they rendered the environment.
Okay, all right, this is a sense some kind of matrix situation here. I think you may have that incorrect. Uh, if you are trying to go to the Dodgers game, Nah, this isn't funny for it either. The La Metro put out a guide. It's like, hey, you can get to public transit through or by leaving Dodger Stadium. Okay, actually, you know what, I'll play it. Here's how you have to traverse the streets of Los Angeles to get home.
If you want to use public transportation leaving one of the World Series games that'll be in La.
Yes, you can walk the Metro rail asset Dodgers down. It's all downhill. It only takes about twenty five minutes. Start by taking a walk rate to the downtown gate. Yeah that's right, I'm walking here.
Okay, so you're walking down this almost highway. It looks like.
Way I mean honestly due you if you have you haven't been to La, right.
No, I have not. I have, no, I've heard nothing.
But it's what's faster walking home any anywhere. Walking anywhere in la is faster than driving anywhere. So when I was there the first, no, I've been there. The first time I was there, I saw a concert and I had to walk kind of out of necessity because I had like just enough for everything I was doing, like enough for a room, enough for a train ticket, and that's barely enough. So for the first time, I remember being there with my maybe it wasn't the first time.
I don't know. I was there with my wife and my kid and one.
Of my wife's friends, maybe ten years ago, and we were, yeah, we walked.
We had walked miles.
We were like in Hollywood or something, and we walked all over, right, and so we were exhausted from walking, and we wanted to go to Chick fil A. I hadn't been to Chick fil A in years at that point. We didn't have one in Reno yet, and I was like, let's find Chick fil A. I found one on my phone and I was like, it's only a mile and a half away, and I had assumed, like, Okay, we've already been walking all day.
A mile and a half, I meant.
At a neighborhood speed, a mile and a half is going to be what maybe ten fifteen, twenty minutes tops, right, for a mile and.
A half walking twenty minutes, right, But I assumed for a ride, right, oh around, yeah? Sure, yeah, so I and I was.
We were all ex exhausted, We're covered in sweat, it's the summer. So I figure, all right, let's just take a cab.
Bussy's stinking right. Put my pussy was ranked, that's what.
Yah.
So we figure, all right, let's take a cab. It'll be way quicker. And we're exhausted, so we take a cab and it took an hour and a half, dude, to get that mile and a half. I remember being so fucking upset, like I was just so mad at the whole time I was sitting in the cab.
And then I got the Chick fil A and it made it a little better.
But yeah, that was just like such a frustrating fucking experience, just being like, oh my god, I just want to get out and walk along the side of the road.
You know it's let me finish this video because it speaks to you're exactly right, but they're saying they're agreeing with you in this video. They're like, it's not so bad. It's a twenty five minute walk through residential neighborhoods and crack slums. Who's better than driving, ain't it? So it is? Yeah? Really all right? By ready? I Oh here's the other point, Like, if this is so bad and you know it's gonna
be mockable, don't put it online. Put like a picture of a map, don't do some walk it out cute music behind it. Don't do any of that. This is a Google Maps thing. We are leaving the stadium now.
Stop by taking the walk right of the downtown date. Yeah, that's right, I'm walking here.
Then take a right on Stadium Way.
Then you're gonna want to take a left out to the I one ten pedestrian bridge. Keep ring down Yale Street, and turn left on College Street. You're almost not just file of College Street past Broadway.
Oh my god, this is getting to be a really bad neighborhood Chinatown. A line station will be on your left.
Tell you could do it. Tell Dodgers that's the most complicated walking path I've ever seen in my life.
That's not super complicated.
It's only a few turns, but it goes through a bunch of shitty neighborhoods and it is up in shithold Chinatown.
Really, it's crazy.
I don't know.
I just thought that was silly for them to post it. I saw two I don't know if these are true. Can I say, can I play something that's not even like political in the sense that it sides one way or another? But I saw two things that I found fucking ridiculous If they're true?
Sure? All right? Spoken to here?
Yeah, all right, I'll play this for you.
You've probably never heard of this one, but this might be the worst business deal for both parties that I've ever heard of. And it revolves around this right here, John, familiar with what this is. It's the Chicago Skyway tollbridge. Obviously, it's a toll road where you put money in and then you and keep driving. It's a big revenue stream
for the city and the state. Well, in two thousand and six, when Chicago was still strapped for cash, they decided we're going to privatize this, so they leased the Chicago Skyway tollbridge to an Australian Spanish company forty years for two billion dollars, ninety nine years for two billion in that same kind of hurdle, SO leased the Indiana toll road for ninety nine years for four billion dollars.
But I here things get interesting. This Australian Spanish company decided to just throw six billion dollars at US public roads, and in twenty fifteen the company actually went bankrupt for spending this bunch of money on these toll roads.
So houses a bad deal for both sides.
Let's really look at what's going on. Chicago and Indiana both got quick influxes of cash try and balance budgets with one time payments, and this company that bought these toll roads immediately started to skyrock at the toll bridge and it's been going on ever since. Even in twenty twenty three, there's been rate hikes on both Indiana and Chicago's toll roads. It's now the public has to bear
the price of them going private. And the fact that the company went bankrupt proved that this deal was just horrible from investor side as well. So congrats to ILLINOI and Indiana. Your citizens are screwed over for another sixty six years of rate hikes.
Good job for those what I like to call shithole states.
There was a there was another one that was even worse, Chicago. Here it is okay, sorry, I was trying to find it on my other screen. Here, let's play this one now again. I don't know if people are gonna find these interesting.
It's just as literally snow crash.
It's stupid bureaucracy regard. I mean, it's or it's dumb decisions based on whoever was in power blah blah blah blah blah, where it's short sighted. Yes, it fits our need now, but is it going to fuck us in the long run. It is often not considered by people seeking re election anyway. Oh yeah, reelection.
I agree wholeheartedly. Maybe not just in financial transactions, but everything.
It's environmental, fucking, spiritual, fucking sexual.
Let's say, did you.
Know that fifteen years ago Chicago made one of the worst deals in US history?
And they too, apparently it was two They're not great deal makers, especially I read Trump's art of the deal that it could be doing way better.
Right, sure, desperate for money, so Mayor Daiies sold all of Chicago's parking meters to a group of investors from the United Arab EPs examp for one point one billion dollars. The deal said that for the next seventy five years, Chicago has to pay off one hundred percent of parking your revenue to the investors company, which is named Chicago
Parking Meters LLC. Chicago's thirty thousand parking meters generate about two hundred million dollars in revenue annually, and because the city is sending that money overseas, none of it will go to Chicagoans. If you think that's bad, it gets worse. If any streets are closed for public events like street festivals or the marathon, the city is to pay this company the money they would have made from parking if
the streets were open. The deal says that if Chicago wants to remove even a single parking meter, they have to pay this company the value of what that meter would have generated until the deal ends in twenty eighty four. This prevents Chicago from building more bike or bus lanes because it would be so expensive to remove the meters. We have fifty nine years left until this deal expires, and nobody's found a loophole to get out of it yet. So next time you see how.
Well come by yeah, ye, all right, all right, hell y, let me be the Saudi Arabians.
No, no, it's not something that the government does. Right, So, you know how you're always saying like.
Look, if you don't want the environment to suck, get a fucking metal straw. You fucking looking your call, mes.
I don't say that because I hate.
Don't expect Exxon Mobile to do anything. They're a business and they have all the rights and they can do anything as long as capitalism says so. So fucking tree hugger.
Okay, the back end you did, Yeah that makes sense.
Yeah, you go and clean up all the fucking oil that they spill, and you would go and clean up all the trash. And you are the one who needs to stop burning gasoline if you want the oil companies to stop digging it out of the ground, you fucks.
While you're on your way there, make sure you build your own roads. Okay, don't use government road.
Go ahead. Now, I see a chance at least to use that same argument where it's like, look, you fucking dumb, lazy Chicagoans.
Yeah, if you don't want your fucking your toll money go into a bunch of fucking dirty United Arab Emirate fucks, then you got to stop using the parking meters, right, So how do you do that?
How about you go green? How about you only walk and bicycle place they can't bicycle.
There's no bicycle lanes because there's the fucking Arabs.
That that's just a matter of provisions. They can just fucking say, okay, well you can ride your bike in the sidewalk.
Now, that's just a matter of it.
And then you're gonna hurt someone. Someone's gonna get killed, dude.
It'll it'll improve everyone's reflexes, and then the people who don't have good reflexes then fuck them.
Right in Chicago, you need good reflexes to dodge those bullets while you're coming out of church on Sunday.
Yeah, so yeah, I see a chance for Chicago to go green, you know, a community based approach for Chicago to go green, and also rob those fucking Dubaians of their their fucking their bomb blots.
What do they spend what's their currency over there the bomb block.
I don't think a bomb block is a currency technical input. Maybe, uh, look at us, We're almost at a full hour here. There there was juicy political stuff. Wow, I just noticed I got a pimple on my forehead.
Gross, let me see it.
Let me see.
Oh no, they looked like Jeff Goldblum from that movie The Fly.
There there was juicy political stuff to dig into, and we didn't have to go to any of it. So let me get your opinions on this stuff real quick. Trump working at a McDonald's.
I mean, disingenuous, also kind of humorous, also kind of made me hungry. Like literally, I saw that clip while I was in bed last night and I was like, fuck, dude, I really want fries right now, which upset me.
Disingenuine What part is disingenuous about it? I only guess because I saw a lot of MSNBC, not even CNN or anything. MSNBC was saying like, oh, what a disgusting political stunt, and it's like people have been doing that for a long long time politicians.
I agree, but it's like I would say the same thing. So it's like when when Joe Biden went and ate ice cream and it was like a big hoopla right that he's going in and eating ice cream.
I thought, like, what's the big deal, motherfucker wants some ice cream, you know. But if he had gone behind the counter and started serving ice cream, I would have
been like, Okay, that's ridiculous, don't do that. I just can't think of any examples from the other side where just find me a clip of somebody doing anything, a politician doing any act, any physical labor, whatsoever, in a public setting, and I find it disingenuous, right, Like everything they do is micromanaged for them, like they they they don't they don't clean up maybe in their own house,
but they don't clean up in public. They don't fucking wait around for a check at a restaurant, you know, like they don't do normal person stuff, like they are rushed in and out everywhere there need to go.
Politicians, especially for president like.
Former presidents, though they like the Secret Service doesn't like to fuck around with them just standing around in public, you know, like they like to have careful orchestrated control over everything. So the more stuff you see them doing, the more you know like, okay, this is this is a stunt.
It's just like, uh, if you saw George Bush, like pulling people out of toppled homes after Katrina. You wouldn't think that would be a normal thing George Bush was just doing on the weekends, would you like, absolutely not? Yeah no.
But I think there's an argument to be made on let's let's have this elite person have just a few hours, and maybe they'll gain point one percent of empathy for these people who do work like this. Like if Kamala Harris was out there picking it right, all right, I bet Trump would have a somewhat different view on immigration to an extent, I think his personal view. I don't know that he would express it and lose votes or whatever if he had to go out and pick lettuce
in the sun for ten hours or whatever. Argument we hear that only immigrants are doing those jobs. I think you develop an empathy like, fuck, this is a tough fucking job in the same way like Mike Road did with dirty jobs.
You know some people are capable of that, you know, it's just and some people are not. I'm not saying Trump is or is not.
I'm not making it.
You're saying you don't do Are you saying you don't think politicians in general are capable of that, and that's why you find it a little disingenuous. Okay, I don't mean that in an accusatory way either.
I just mean that absolutely would be. I think that it's just.
Whatever insight they might glean from taking part in some sort of.
Show of physical labor or work or whatever, it's completely overshadowed by what they're gaining. Right. They're they're trying like unless they are subjected to real like, hey, we're going to take you out of your comfort zone and you have no choice in things anymore, which is not going to happen with politicians. That's where real insight is going to come from. I'm not going to say like they don't gain anything, but it's just.
That until they actually live that life or something really close to it, that there, it's about what they're gaining. And that's fine. It's that's politics, right. I'm not saying it's a horrible thing. It's just like I find those little, again, disingenuous stunts to be a waste of time, right, Like and again I understand that there's political gain and that's why they're doing it.
Right.
It's like when when celebrities I like, do interviews I wouldn't want to watch. So if I'm a fan of somebody and then they show up on a show that I don't like, or with an interviewer who sucks, it's like, god damn it, you know, like, why do I have to be subjected to this? I don't even want to I'm not even gonna watch it, you know. And that's kind of how I feel with the politics. It's like, Okay, I can have the person I like, but it's like, ugh, I don't even want to watch this part. I know
you got to do it. It's part of your press tour or whatever. But I'm good.
I had that with Bill Maher the other day. Here was his list of panel people. Okay, okay, I like Bill Maher too. I don't especially like Bill Maher. I like the environment he could create in discussion. But like when I I'll put on Bill Maher fast forward through the first like eight twelve minutes whatever, that monologue, I don't care about the jokes at the beginning. I watched
the interview, then I watched the panel. Then when it gets to new rule, no, when it gets to the mid thing, like he normally doesn't mid panel, it's like, huh. I have a new bit. It's called like twenty one questions with Eric Trump. Question one isn't aren't you retarded?
Too?
You know? I fest forward through them, get back to the panel, and then I'll watch New Rules. This week's panel was Joe Scarborough, host of MSNBC, with his fucking wife Mika Brazinski, who's I think her father engineered the golf war maybe or the Vietnam War something like that.
That's for fucking was he got a PhD in engineering wars?
Brazinsky? Look it up? I forget Is it George Brazinsky something like that. So Joe Scarborough, who's intolerable, A newly diked out Mark Cuban with Rachel madel Glasses.
I like Mark Cuban.
He's a cunt and he's always been a cunt.
He plays for the Mavericks.
No he doesn't, and he sold that team.
He plays for them?
No, he doesn't, and he sold that team. Will you do this is a tall guy? No, he actually isn't, and he sold that team.
He's really tall and he plays for the Mavericks. Or no, he plays for the Suns.
The third guy on the panel was David.
Hog Ooh, I bet he's got a fat one.
Do you know who the Yeah, I bet he's had a fat one put inside of him before.
Uh.
It was intolerable. I couldn't watch it. I did not even give it a shot. I saw the lineup like they take a picture at the end, and I was like, Wow, there's no diversity of opinion on this one. There's not There's not going to be. So why do I want to hear it? I don't want to hear just agreement for an hour.
Sometimes I do, though, sometimes I'm just like, God, everybody's been fucking disagreeing with me all day, and I just need some fucking agreement in my life. You know.
See that to me is like scoop and ice cream at an ice cream place as president of the world.
Right, Yeah, No, I don't see it that way though. I I okay, I do. But I'm what I'm saying is that I'm I'm more empathetic now than I've ever been towards stupid people who live in echo chambers right where it's like, you know, you're getting yelled at by your boss, You're getting yelled at by your wife, you getting yelled at by your parents. Getting yelled at by your kids.
You just want to listen to fucking a lot of agreement. So you put on Bill Maher, you put on Alex Jones, you synthesize some sort of weird world in your head that everything makes sense, and then you shoot the president at a golf course.
Okay, all right. Sometimes you'll be dressed up in your cookie monster outfit for work and you see the guy holding a sign to not trans kids, and you feel like you have info you can tell him too. Maybe that's just one example I have in this video here, but maybe it's not. So I don't know who this guy is. This isn't a trans thing, by the way. This is kind of to show you how nuts some of these people are. This is the guy. He wears a sign of of what do they call it? Sandwich board?
I think when it's front and back Bruce willis war a really cool one. And yeah three that's my Halloween costume this year, by the way, Oh really that's my cats Okay, uh, all right, So this guy just walks around with a sign children cannot consent to you, berty blockers. He's an anti trans guy. At whatever opinion you want on that that's fine. What's funny is the guy who
comes up to him. So this is one of those times square looking gentlemen who comes up to which basically means they bought like an Elmo or a you know, buzz light years man, and it's real horseshit, and they get nasty with you. Yeah, it's filthy. They're flea batman. So this is a cookie Monster. And mind you, if you're dressed like Cookie Monster, you're likely going to be taking pictures with children. So this is one of the guys that's around your children.
Oh what's that. I don't think we should give kids blockers. Yeah, we shouldn't be trying to change the sex.
Yeah for you, Cookie Monster goes, Yeah, you're that's true. God on you. You're right now. Wait for the second half, because cookie Monster has some information. Maybe anti trans guy wasn't privy.
To Okay, Jews, the Jews.
He said, I could be out here talking about the Jews. It's the Jews that do that, you know, Oh, man, hold on, is it?
I don't know. It's the Jews. Most of the doctors and that are Jewish, mostly abortion doctors are too.
Most of the doctors are Jewish. Most of the abortion doctors are Jewish too.
No, I heard that. Part that I mean is that in dispute.
Jews, like Cookie Monster goes, there's a big problem with Jews in this country.
I'm just telling you that I looked at these issues.
Yeah, I hear this all the time.
It's not true, but that's okay. Everyone's entitled to the.
Dude. When even the anti trans guy is shutting your hands down, he's like, oh no, no, dude, you sound like kind of a crack pot. But anyway, Alex Jones was telling me about turning the frogs into fags, not gay, just fags. They were driving Harley's.
Well, you know what, man, it's nice to see.
I see a lot of disagreement on the left side of politics, just because there's so many things.
There's levels of how far to take it, it seems. Yeah, but that's actually probably both sides too. Well.
I tend to see quite a bit of agreement from a lot of people on the right, just in like how beliefs kind of line up. So I think this is actually a good thing right here. It's it's nice to see. It's refreshing to see the anti trans guy not be like oh yeah, yeah, and they calls hurricanes.
He didn't just buy into the entire thing, right, yeah, right, yeah? Well, hey, now is this guy behind him jewish or homeless with a fucking silly hat on?
I think he's, you know, like they have people in character. I think he's in character as a homeless Jewish guy.
Rabbi Schmoley, that's what he's in character as.
Uh, all right, I please a.
Rabbi Smoley's a real guy. But yes, I agree, we're gonna wrap this one up. He's a Robert or Robert Smoley. Rabbi Schmoley is the guy that's real good friends with Robert Kennedy. Oh and he mocks Candace Owens a lot because Candace Owens, I don't know, found a brown suit in her closet.
Somewhere, so she just matched. Well.
Rabbi Schmoley's kind of a douche too. People don't like him. Whatever, Who gives a fuck. Let's go over to the Patreon Go to your Worst Friend dot com, follow us everywhere on Twitter and Instagram at worst friend Cast Patreon dot com Sola's Worst Friend Cast, and yeah, sign up, you can bonus episode every week, access to everything ever recorded entirely commercial free, all right, rock on, all right for your worst friend. I'm Matt, I'm heavy metal Shane. Thanks
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