M let me finish. This is the first time I committed a hate crime. Maybe they'll jerk my dick off or something like that. Yeah, probably we've disgusted. I'm associate bath An. You thrashed relationship, any trash ship. You're a worst friend.
Do you want to know why you're all fucked up?
Just look at the fucking problems you hang around with. You're listening to Your Worst Friend with Shane and Matt. I'm Matt, and I'm joined today by my friend and co host The Dark Side of the Force, my father, Shane.
What's up? Bomba clots?
Every time I go to edit, there's always this yap in the middle there, and I go, oh, fuck, do I have to match it up? And then I match it at the beginning. Nope, just a nice delay. I appreciate that delay.
I just wanted you to sit there for a second and feel my name in the in the atmosphere. I wanted you to just let it condense on your skin and then phase through your epidermis, get launched into your subcutaneous fat so I could stay warm inside of you for a while.
Go to your Worst Friend dot com, follow us everywhere on Twitter and Instagram at Worstfriendcast. Most importantly, go to patreon dot com slash worst friend Cast. You can get a bonus episode every week access to everything ever recorded, entirely commercial free.
Uh.
Today we will be talking about my journey out into the world of hanging out with people and how much I hated it.
Yeah, yeah, dude, you told me that, you told me you did some weird shit that I have to really like nail you for, like I got to hammer down and find out, like, what the fuck is wrong with you?
So we will be talking about that on the Patreon. There's a seven day free trial to go. Sign up for the Patreon last time.
Don't take advantage.
Yeah, go, no, don't do it. Don't go on there and just download everything. That would be so bad for me, because then I won't get you twelve dollars over the course of a year.
Well, if you do download everything, listen to it. That's what I mean by don't take advantage. Don't just download it and then let it go into the digital trash pile in the middle of the ocean.
The digital void.
Yeah, the digital garbage island.
Canceled YouTubers and fucking everything else goes too. I'm stuck because I really want to bring a topic up. Oh, by the way, James Earl Jones is dead. That's why he's the dark course.
Fuck, he was supposed to play Move Fast. How are they gonna do that movie? Now?
Didn't he play Mufasa twenty five years ago.
Well, they're making a movie now. It's coming out in like a couple of months. It's called Mufasa the Lion King, and it's about his journey from a young cub to being the king who will eventually go on to die in another movie. I don't think they're gonna end on that part of his life in the new Mufasa movie. They could must be a fucking bummer because he won't get avenged at all. Imagine if that was the end of the movie.
I was gonna say, he should They should have this big, like, you know, triumphant moment of a young Mufasa beating something or him and Scar teaming up and you know, destroying the I don't know, monkeys or something or fucking whatever, and then just flash cut and just says twenty years later or five years later or whatever the life span of thee yeah, yeah, and the other one just stomping on his fucking I almost said dog hand. Yeah, well it's a cat, Paul, but close the big dick stumping
on his dog dick. You know what did I say? I said that the other day and Jen never heard that expression, the expression if so so a guy cut me off right, uh, And I said, uh, cut me off again. I'll beat the fucking dog dick off of you.
Uh yeah, that just sounds like you were gonna jerk off his weirdly circumcised penis.
Oh okay, all right, well then I was wrong. Let me show you this pigs dick though.
Okay, oh yeah, I remember, dude. That thing looked like a fucking emu's dick.
We got great feedback on that, by the way.
Oh really from who the fans?
Yeah, a couple people on the Patreon Rory gave us props on that.
Hey Rory, Hey, hey Rory.
Anyway, James Old Jones ninety three years old is dead.
That is not James ol Jones in that picture that that looks like fucking Jordi LaForge.
The kind of another bite, Well, it looks like if Jordie LaForge and Bernie Sanders had some kind of weird kid together.
Who's the asshole who made this picture black and white? They were definitely trying to make him look like a fucking escape slave who got a law degree.
Did James Earl Jones always have a wonk eye or did that happen later in the.
Oh he always did? Yeah? Yeah, and Conan he definitely did.
Don't see I not eye color. Who gives a fuck because all the pictures are in black and white? No, I don't think so.
It's a lazy eye. That's the thing is. It's like it's not always wonked, but sometimes it goes wonk. You know, look at that one. Look at that motherfucker right there on the left, right next to Lisa Simpson.
Uh this here, Oh, okay, that's wonky. That's a wonk die.
That's a wonked motherfucker. Hmm.
All right, Well, James Earl Jones is dead. He was one of the first people and I think R. Willis recently did it too. It's so smart. They sold the rights to their likeness and voice and all of that stuff.
Okay, so they'll make money after they're dead when they continue to put them on screen and stuff.
So let me think about that. Yeah, exactly, They're family. Well, for sure, maybe unless you just take a big settlement up front.
Oh yeah, dude, I wouldn't say.
Probably what they did.
They don't need to benefit off me after I'm gone. They've already leeched off of me enough while I was here.
You get one hundred grand for your voice and just hit a strip club, I'll do it. Pussy ruped in my face. It was great.
I got fucking one lap dance and then was asked to leave. Then I had to pay for an uber home that was five hundred bucks.
Uh fucking But I thought the same thing because I see a lot of girls on when we do when I do the porn star interviews, a lot of them. I haven't asked any of them about AI, which is really stupid of me because it's kind of a big deal. But fucking you could, if you were one of like the big name star girls, you could probably sell your rights and likeness and whatever end. And would we ever even need new porn?
Yeah, because they don't always get the fingers right. No, No, I'm fingering a pussy Okay, all right, you were like, you don't want to like, you don't want to have like the fingers switching between three and four. As it's going in and out, it's like, dude, what the fuck? Dude looks like her fingers getting chopped off and then growing back every time it comes out of the pussy.
Oh my god. I like this porn, but I think it's weird. She's getting fingered by Danny DeVito's the penguin.
Oh man, Danny DeVito, he is the best. Okay, so when someone's type cast that can be an insult. But I'm so glad that Danny DeVito went from being type cast as like the the likable fat guy to the degenerate, filthy X monster. It just suits him so well.
Stex was always something that came in, but I think he always played like or is the sex or something that came in later. You're right with the Frank Renold stuff. But he always kind of played a slimeball, didn't he.
He always played like lower what was the class characters? I guess like a lower class. That's almost more insulting to him. He's a he's a trashy dude in a lot of movies. He ate and drank and burped and farted, and he abused his kids, and you know, like these are just the roles we remember loving him as in
or whatever. And uh, I think once he added in that like nihilistic sociopathic quality to his performance, Like I prefer that type cat like I'm in saying with Nicholas Cage, right, Like Nicholas Cage is doing way too many movies that suck, But I like that he leans into the extreme aspects the things that people like.
So I grew up one of those niked night kids, like we've talked about before, and oh, that motherfucker was on I watch I've seen it. Yeah, I've seen every episode of Taxi. That enough, that enough, But that would make enough of a career doing a show like Taxi one hundred and fourteen episodes. It was a classic sitcom. But then you know he does fucking terms of aperviowment. Uh,
you got other great movies like Romancing the Stone. What he was in terms of endearment, he was in a terms of endearment with That's a really good show.
I was telling my wife the plot to this movie and she's like, we should watch it, and I was like, I was telling you the plot so we wouldn't have to.
I do I do that sometimes too.
By the way I try and spoil the.
Ending and go, you probably don't want to watch it now because it's stune. Because she's like, oh, we could still check it out. I literally have to say, I go, you can watch it when I fall asleep early sometime. Like if we're watching something and I fall asleep, just go right ahead and put that shit on, because I will never whatever it is, I will never watch it.
I was like, let's just wait for someone in your family to die watch it. But it's like the movie is Deborah Winger. She is in a relationship with Jeff Daniels. I think she marries him. Oh there he is. He's young here. So she's in a relationship with Jeff Daniels. She's got this tumultuous relationship with her mom. Who is that Faye Dunaway, who is that?
No, Shirley McLean.
Shirley McLain. Yeah, So it's basically like a family drama. But then Deborah Winger gets cancer, so she's in it's like terminal. So it's like one of these movies. But it's like, man, like all these issues just hit and hit and hit and hit. So it's like right at
the end of her being at her life. She finds out Jeff Daniels is cheating on her and like her and like her mom and her lay out all this resentment and like there's just all this shit that like doesn't get resolved, you know, like all this like grief and loss and sorry, it's a miserable fucking experience watching this movie. And then she dies.
It sounds quite Oh, thank you for Tendle telling me the ending, because it sounds terrible.
Yeah, it's it's a really just like I don't understand the name. It should have been like terms of fucking estrangement, you know, because it's like all this shit. I'd be like, I'll stay away from these motherfuckers.
Love and her daughter's family problem follows hard to please Aurora looking for love and her daughter's family problems? Is she looking for her daughter's family problem?
I think she's just sputting her nose in. I guess I, like I said, I remember, she gets cancer, she fucking dies.
Fucking Terms of Endearment stinks, Yeah, but I'm angry about it now. I have no interest in this movie. I'm not gonna tell her. She doesn't watch things like this. She watches scary movies that are terrible most of the time.
I'm pretty sure dying of cancer and your family having all this unresolved trauma and that being your last thought is pretty terrifying. Ask her, go tell him, ask her if it's terrifying.
No, then you want to fucking watch it?
All right? What?
Don't tell her? For real? You saw you said you saw Beetlejuice right in it?
Okay, he plays it. He's so he's in costume like his you know, he can't all he can't exactly tell it's him because his face is painted purple and he's got green contacts. That's it. That's the only but's.
The only thing. How was the movie? Was it good?
I'll tell you what, man. I'm a I'm a huge simp for the original Beetle Juice, and I hate Tim Burton. I fucking hate Timberton. I don't like his whole Oh I'm so fucking weird, and that's what makes my ship appealing. It's like, dude, you're not weird. You're just as pretentious and awful as every fucking other art school dropout. You know, You're just a fucking piece of shit. You just happen to be good at making a few movies. He's he's got some tricks. Like I liked What Sleepy Hollow. It's
a little corny now, but I still enjoy it. I love Beetlejuice. I like The Nightmare Before Christmas. There's one other one that I think I remember really enjoying. What's What's another really good Tim Burton movie.
You probably like big Fish.
I did not like big Fish. I don't understand it.
Okay, that's like more of a like a heartfelt I didn't understand. His dad was a fucking liar, That's what it was, but not a total liar. He was just an like, what is it an embellisher, So he'd be like this guy came in and he was twenty two feet tall, and we fucking double team is broad And then I married her at your mother and then the guy shows up he's only seven too. It's shack, oh, I fucked your mom. You might have some of my
DNA am I left it up in there? I totally forgot from the same Tim Burton is the Fat Girl director.
Yes, yes, fat girls like to adorn their arms with tattoos of his films.
Yes, it's it's a over a line, Okay, Mars Attacks is good.
Mars at tax is another one. Yeah, I like that one. That's a good one.
Yeah, all right, we're gonna.
Let's okay, so let's go through this list and pick out every movie got a fat girl would be onto her skin, like, we'll cover the characters whatever.
They would say, either franken Weeny or Vincent, which are the precursors.
But I like Frank and Weeney. As a kid, I had the VHS fine beetlejuice.
They would definitely get beatle juice on their arms. Absolutely, okay. Not Batman, Lesbian Batman. I could see flat Woman.
No, I could see cat Catwoman, Catwoman.
There you go, is not the first Batman. Batman returns factor right right right, Edward scissorhands time, fat girl movie.
By time, Edward scissorhand tattoos as well.
You're one hundred percent right about the tattoos to it always goes too. I know my arms look like hamhowks, but I deserve to have fucking Jack Skellington tattooed on their I.
Always thought they were hiding their arms. I thought that they thought I thought that they thought that we would think that their arms looked smaller. If they were, you know, covered in bright adornments, drawing attention to them.
Well, you see, as great of a decade as it was in the nineties. Unfortunately, we kicked off this ridiculous no bullying campaign where we could no longer say, hey, your fat arms gross me out, lady, cover them things up, or anything like that.
I said that you ain't gonna stop me.
Dar didn't do shit for me. Mad didn't do shit for me, and neither of you.
I said that at jim Boys Tacos the other day, I was getting chicken tacos and I ordered grilled chicken tacos and I drove like I got the food, and I drove up like ten feet and then I looked because there's a car behind me. I didn't want to look like the guy who was slowing everything down. It was beef, So I went inside and I was like, oh, I asked for beef, or I asked for chicken. You gave me beef. And the lady like she kind of gave me this whole like, oh, I don't really understand
English type thing. And this other guy came over and fixed the whole issue. But then I looked at chicken and I was like, dude, your fucking arms are so fat and they look like hamhocks and you should get fired, you fat bitch.
You said that.
Yeah, yeah, dude, they gave me.
A card for twenty five dollars, a free punch card.
Yeah.
Yeah, No.
She was just like okay, and she went back to like sweeping.
Sure Edwards is her hands. Fact girl movie, Batman returns, Fat Girl movie, but Boy movie too. You know, I think the best one of those four, right.
My favorite probably the best. Yeah, you're you're right. Yeah, Danny DeVito is really good in Tattoo is the fucking Stupid Penguin?
Ed would great movie, one of my favorite movies actually, but quirky and no tattoos.
For that one though, No, no way.
Mars Attacks, possible tattoos, possible possible lot of markers, but that might be okay, that transcends fat Girl Mars Attacks for me. Yeah, Boy's movie.
Okay, if you saw a hot chick with a Mars Attacks tattoo, you would be like, oh, am I about to become the subject of a of a coming of age film from the early two thousands, you know, like this could be something special. But yeah, fat girl with a Mars Attacks tattoo, fucking throw it to the wolves.
Fuck die, Yeah, exactly to kill yourself. Uh, sleepy hollow Fact Girl movie.
Definitely. I could see them getting Johnny Depp ted with the I could see a lot of different frames from that movie as tattoos, a lot of different iconic images.
I could see Depth's face on multiple fucking Tim Burton movies where you just like switch out the hair because yeah, Sweeney Todd's coming up, and I.
God, that's another one. Oh my god.
Playing to the Apes Boys movie. Yeah, big big Fish, I think his highest rated movie. I don't even know who that was for.
I don't even know what the fuck that is. I remember seeing it in theaters and being excited about it and not having any reaction to I remember sitting there and being like, this is gonna pay off at the end. And Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Fact Girl movie.
Maybe I'm not disagreeing. I just look sense.
Yeah, I know that she liked this movie and she was like a skinny girl body. Yeah, definitely. Uh.
Corpse Bride, Big Fact Girl movie.
Yeah, like Corpse White stinks and it's one it's like right below that movie that's not on this list because it's not directed by Tim Burton, which is uh, what is it Night Before Christmas? Yeah, we didn't say that. That was in ninety six, I believe, but yeah, he was the producer and the story for that. But yeah, Facral movie.
Uh, I mean we don't really have to go through the rest Sweeney.
In Wonderland.
Yeah, fact, girl movie gave a shit about. I don't mean no one gave a ship about big eyes. No one gave a shit about.
Facral Movieirl movie that girls identify quite a bit with them behind. And he's got big ears. I've got big these big flappy hamhok arms. Maybe I'll fly away from a circus too.
The circus that is my life.
The circus that is my fucking job, trying to make corn dogs for people in the mall.
Well, my room, this room here is a fucking wreck. And I uh, I looked at David our Cat the other day and Jen was over there, and I go, he was like trying to navigate around all the fucking boxes and whatever else. I'm trying to hide in a closet somewhere, and I just look at him and I just say this sincerely and I go, someday, you'll live in a world without confusion. Goes, what a fucking thing to say to a cat? And I go, yeah, it is a weird thing, but I actually meant that from
my heart. I'd like, you're my little cat, like I'd like to give you a world that isn't horrendous and a mess and constantly changing like my life is.
I always talk to my pets like they're humans. I think that's a good the best way to do it. How long have you had the cat? Now?
H three weeks? A month something like that.
Oh, okay, So he's like still in his transition period, right. It takes a few months for them to get all adjusted and and shitting and pissing and not fucking like getting scared every time a stranger comes in and stuff.
He ship right away in your bed. He he figured out the litter box and everything.
Right, Okay, that's good, that's good. Yeah. Uh.
The issue is he's very jittery, so he does get like scared and this and that. Even if you just bump something, he could take off running. But he's not totally adverse to being around people.
So he's the victim of sexual assault.
Likely that's why I act that way.
Yeah, you got a lot of trauma to unpack with that guy. Yeah, he asked him about his eye. I know he told you he was born that way. But if you asked him yet.
Someone fucked my face.
Oh I was born this way, but they've been fucking my face ever since then. Don't try it. Please, don't say I sparked the idea.
I saw an old white lady. Yesterday we had to drive to No Yeah, that's the Patreon. Yesterday we had to drive to North Jersey. Today. We had to drive in North Jersey too. Yesterday though, I saw this fucking white lady, like early seventies, maybe late late sixties, rough slave owner, real seaside, look like like that guy, like, oh, that's a brown person. No wait, they've just been cooked in the sun.
Maybe he's an Arab. Maybe it's James Earl Jones.
This lady was fucking sitting in the back of her van, like the back door was open, right, And this was on a side street in like a small town. It was crazy where this lady was. I wish I could, like I knew exactly, I wish I knew what street it was so I could Google Maps and show you she I mean, just like picture your street right or you grew up on, like uh whatever by me, we're your high school house, right, Okay? Picture just somebody around the corner from you parking their van and then a
full New York Sobretts hot dog cart. This seventy year old woman is dishing out dirty water dogs on a fucking side street.
Huh. I don't understand. She's she's in the car dishing out the dogs, or she's like set up shop.
So she has the no, she has a mini van and she has the back up right Okay, okay, so here's the back and so yeah, I'm sitting on the EDDI so it's like a yes, correct, yeah, exactly exactly. And she's sitting on the back. And sometimes I saw three people like get hot dogs from her. I was like the fuck, why would you do that? But again, just a residential street.
Was it drugs? Was the hot dog? Drugs? Did you check?
Call? No? I did not. Well they were no, they were hard working. They were like Mexican construction guys, so they probably just wanted some grub.
So they like drugs too to to get through the day working, Like do you think they want to have to hear like all these complaints from these white guys like, oh, make sure that the fucking walkway is symmetrical, Javier, I don't even speak English. I don't know what it is symmetrical, you.
Know, yeah, no, yeah, yeah, no, I don't think so. I think he was.
Already gonna do it symmetrically. It's like, oh, he knows that, but he doesn't know what that word in English. In Spanish, it's like symmetrically, you know, yeah, he connection there, he's almos.
Gonna make it symmetrically. But then you know, this fucking fat white man, probably Italian greaseball.
Or fucking English, they're the worst.
Uh No, my cat's English. He's fine, he's going, he's only go one eye. That's weird.
I don't know. I think my cat is African.
Probably. Why why did you assume that?
Well, because it's because it's well, you look it up. If you look it up on your phone and you click the little icon, like you know, you look at the info and then it's like, oh, this is a pet and you click it and you search it. The AI says, it's like some you know, some fucking black Wildcat.
Boy could be from downtown Detroit.
Yeah, it could be an inner city youth trying to make money for his football team.
I'm just trying to sell these to make money for my football team.
Please, do you want to help support the wildcast? Sir?
The wildcat They're always the Wildcats. They're always the Wildcats. Fucking all right? What is your You know music better than I do? Now, let me pick a piece of music you have no concept of, because you don't probably think they suck Lincoln Park? Were you a fan ever.
The first Cup? For the first two albums they have? They have two albums I really did greatly enjoy from the maybe seventh grade, sixth grade to what is it?
Which one?
Heidi? Aura?
Was that? The one?
Yeah? Heis Mediora? Are the first two albums and then they had one more after that that I thought was like, Okay, there's some listenable songs, but there's a They're a different band now, right, Like they're making different music at this point, and I kind of just lost interest. And I never really enjoyed anything else I heard from them, but those two albums. I don't. I can't. It's been years, honestly since i've listened to either one of them, maybe more
than one song. You know, I might have listened to one song a few months ago, but I still have fond memories. And I'm pretty sure if I try and listen to either one of those first two cover to cover, even if I don't like love it, I'll still like see like, oh, this is what I liked about it. This is what I still like about it, this is what's corny, this is how it was influential. I'll be able to get a lot of enjoyment out of it,
for sure. But yeah, they're not a band that interests me at this point, especially now that they're singers.
The compression cut you off, but raspberries blank boink? Oh what.
You know? Like now that he's slipped on a banana peel, I.
Don't know if that's too high. If the compression coat killed himself, he killed himself.
A fucking rode the train down to Hades.
So his son, Chester, Bennington's son, tweeted out Lincoln Park just announced their bringing on a new lead singer, a female co lead singer, Emily Armstrong. I don't know her, do you know her?
I hadn't known her at all before this announcement. I will say this, though, I I know Lincoln Park has super loyal fans. There's some bands that their fans precede them in reputation. Slipknot is one. I think Insane clown Posse is one. This is one. Lincoln Park is one. They have a super fucking loyal fan base. They have
a fan club. I forget what it's called, but it's like it's something relating to the first couple albums, like, but they have like a super loyal fan club that does remixes, like is active in messaging, purchases live recordings, remix recordings, like, supports the individual members directly. They got a loyal following. Okay, okay, but all right, so I thought, that's what I'm saying, Like, that's what I know about Lincoln Park is like, damn, people fucking love this band.
You know, Chester Bennington's kid came out and tweet it or whatever. Posted at the other lead singer, Mike Shower.
Yeah. Yeah, he's the one who does the rap vocals. He's Asian, so it's extra awkward.
He wrote, Hey, Mike, people aren't having a difficult time wrapping their head around the prospect of Lincoln Park reinventing itself. They are having a hard time wrapping their head around how you won hired your friend of many years, Emily Armstrong to replace Chester. B By the way, buddy, you don't have to tag your dad's account anymore. He's dead Chester.
Let him accept it when he's ready, okay.
Knowing Emily's history in the church and her history as an ally to Danny, Masterson quietly raised, here's what I don't get.
Okay, wait a minute, is that the sex cult guy?
That's no, that's the that seventies show guy.
What did he do again?
Hey? Raped?
How many rapes did he?
Do? I think? Want one? Or two?
How good is the evidence? Like? We can we be sure? Or like? Do we have to go to bath for this guy? And Scott Peterson his ass.
I thought it was he said, she said, But.
I thought it was two girls at one time.
Uh yeah, yeah, no, not one time. No.
I was gonna say it because I couldn't hold down and rape two bitches at once.
The judge goes, I don't want to hold two trials. You broads are gonna just be tried. You know, we're gonna try. Danny Massison you're both gonna be co plaintiffs, and if you could kiss a little, I'd really enjoy watching that. It'll make my day a lot easier. Thank you.
Well. I can't say I remember all the details, but I think the reason I mixed it up with the sex cult people is because I think he was pretty bad, pretty egregious in what he did to people's holes.
You're right, we should be sensitive about it, okay. In system was charged with raping a twenty three year old woman in two thousand and one, a twenty eight year old woman in early two thousand and three, and a twenty three year old woman in late two thousand and three. Ok I gotta be honest with you. I get it. That's horrendous. Blah blah blah. Ladies, think about this one, this one right here, this twenty three year old in
two thousand and one. She left him on the street for nineteen years to go commit other rapes, and he did in early two thousand and three and late two thousand and three. This girl, the first one, should be charged with two counts of rape.
See, folks, that's why we should always blame the victim. Yes, yes, that way we get to leave victims.
Yeah, we get to the we get to the core of who's really at fault here. So this yeah, this person defended Danny Masterson and I guess.
She's the Emily the news. Yes, Lincoln Park Okay.
Sorry, yes, yes, yes, And Nnington's kid is like, hey, no, it's not cool.
On's he got another gripe after that, because I don't like scientology either.
Yeah, he's got two. So quietly erased my father's life and legacy in real time, not only during a band interview meant to clear the air about certain aspects of Lincoln Park's history and future, but during International Suicide Prevention Month. I gotta be honest, it's always some kind of month. Oh yeah, always some kind of month. My favorite one is fucking P and VEG month. That's when you celebrate
the union of man a woman. None of his P and the B stuff for the P and the A stuff or the P and the M stuff, only P and V VEG. Yeah. Yeah, So I assume when he says he erased his father's legacy, it was probably some bullshit, Like, you know, I wrote most of the songs. I know, I'm the rapping Chinese guy and stuff and you would think the guy with the like actual vocal talents could do it. But I wrote like all the songs pretty much.
I wrote the best lyrics. Actually, do you.
Have a favorite song? Yeah? I do? What is it?
Never?
This one?
Yeah?
I wrote that one? Yeah?
Yeah, I wrote the lyrics and the music for that one and all the other ones on that album. So if you like that album especially, that's my album.
But if you don't like the album, Chester and his dumb soun wrote it.
Yeah, once the album started to turn into shit, even if they go back and forth, those are all chesters like he fucking sucks, dude, he fucking sucks so bad he had to kill himself over it. Here's here's so before we go any further with this, like, what do you think about Okay, so I don't know that it's directly erasing the legacy or whatever, but what do you think about like after a member of a band dies.
No, I was literally thinking of taking it there. Let's finish this out because I have a full thing on that.
Okay.
So the third one was have refused to acknowledge the impact of hiring someone like Emily without so much as clarifying as a clarifying statement on the variety of victims that make you up your core fan base. So fuck, I can't read no acknowledgement of the way you groom your fan base, Chester Bennington, Chester's kids or family, my falling out with your wife Anna Shanoda, who cannot be mentioned, either Danny Masters and victims, or even Emily's intimidation of
those victims. So I read this. Emily broad put out a statement and said, uh, hey, I was asked to defend him. He was a friend of mine for a long time. I went to one of the early things. Once I found out what he did, I never saw him again after That is what her statement was. She said, I never contacted him. I never once I realized the extent of what was going on. I gotta be honest. I don't give a shit about Lincoln Park. It doesn't sound like you give much of a shit either. But
disneyws story popped up sex stuff. So that's let's start with that question. I think you've said it before. You don't care who someone is friends with.
Well to a certain extent, like I think that I think that you can learn a lot about who someone is about someone by who they're friends with right, Like, so if you are acquainted with someone right and you notice that, geez, this person seems to hang around with
like a lot of shady guys. Like there's a lot of dudes with like track suits, gold chains and slick back hair and spaghetti stains on their shirts that show up behind the office and drop off packages for Brendan in accounting every every Tuesday, and like they're just some shady looking characters. When you ask him about it, he just kind of brushes it off and doesn't give you He gives you a non answer. You know, I think there's something weird about about that. You don't. You don't
know enough to know that. Look, if Brendan comes up to you and asks you to print out, hey, can you can you print this report for me? Because I don't have time to do it, you don't have enough to think like, oh, well, this guy is a bad guy. He's definitely trying to get he's trying to get me fired.
He's trying to get me to do something that I would never like, you don't have enough for that, but you do have enough to be a little suspicious and maybe and maybe double check, like, okay, is everything that I'm doing being asked to do allowable like you know what I'm saying. It gives you a little bit of a barometer. But I do think that there's stuff you can learn. But I wouldn't say, like outright like because somebody's friends with X, you shouldn't hang out with them.
Yeah, I guess it would depend on what.
A child rapist or something. I mean, it's that like I feel like those are obvious things though, you know.
I guess, but that was the one of that was one you've defended it before.
Well I think I probably defended it from a place of being rhetorical, like I'm not hanging out with a child rapist.
I think it was Gnom Chomsky when they asked him about Epstein and he was like he was my friend. That's all there is too.
Oh yeah, I hated that answer. I thought that was a horrible answer.
You you oh, but you told me you were like, I don't give a shit who were friends with. I mean that stuck with me because only because I was like, like I kind of got it, like if they you know, if they when they find out your file and I'm still be like, man, you know, all the good times and this and that, Like if they found child porn all over your I would be like, oh, he's a monster, he's disgusting. But at the same time I'd be like, yeah, I mean the good times when you.
Would warn a certain person who's gone right, you would mourn even if that person had something hidden that you just shattered that image. You're still holding on to this fake image that you're this half truth, you know, this sure partial version of them, and that's like it's just human nature, right, Like you can't deny that that would happen. So yeah, I can totally see myself making that argument, and yeah, I stand by that, But I'm still not going to hang out with no fucking child rapist.
So what about what about Danny Masterson? What if you were friends with him?
Oh? Yeah, see that. I'll be honest with you, dude, My cutoff is pretty like your drama doesn't have to be high for me to decide it's too much for me, you know, like I don't want to hear Like basically, if you're a pedophile, I'll hang out with you, just be certain that I never ever ever find out, you know, hide it from me.
I'm sure you've hung out with pedophiles before. Yeah, of course, yeah, sure, I've had some in my family. It's all good.
Sure about a couple, yeah, uh, okay, reboots shit like that.
Right, here's how I feel nothing has to destroy the original. The original will always be right where it is. You can always go back and enjoy it. Unless Okay, here's why I don't like it. Ready, reboot a movie a thousand times, do a thousand sequels. I don't care. If it's good, I'll enjoy it. If it's bad, it doesn't make me go. Well, that one was shit. I love the first mission, impossible, the second one is a total piece of shit.
The third one's an improvement, and.
Then they get real silly after that. Exactly right.
I don't know that they get Okay, they get real silly, silly, but they're also like, yeah, I didn't say they're bad.
I said they're silly. You know what. Silly Crank is silly to me, and so are Jigsaw movies silly silly Jigsaw.
I got to watch that one.
So I I got drunk or something, and it wasn't very good.
But Boswan, that's my fucking kids who.
Never hurts the original. I'll tell you. I will take a thousand shitty black female trans led Star Wars movies. Okay, I will take a thousand more of them if they stop fucking with the old films and stop editing them and then only saying you can take like for a while Lucas edited and put in all that other bullshit. Oh yeah, like to the original Star Wars movies. But then was like, you can only buy this copy, you can only buy this version. This is I hate that.
I agree, that's bullshit. Like I think that once the art is out, it belongs to the fan. Like the artists can keep redoing their art as much as they want, right, but they have no authority. I mean legally they do, but it's just in my eyes, they have no authority to be like, look, I know that you prefer the original, but you will only ever be able to get the
new one. It's like, I think that's bullshit. It's like I think, if you're an artist, should let the fan have whatever version of your art they prefer, you know, because that's the one that makes them feel good or that makes them moved or whatever.
And most of the time, especially with classic movies, you they were perfect. They were classic, even if there was a little thing the mona. Lisa doesn't need bigger tits, Okay.
I mean it wouldn't hurt.
No, you're right, it wouldn't hurt if she had a big, fat rack on her.
Oh dude, in her fucking pussy was all trimmed up and then you know get they cleaned the fucking fleas out of it during I guess that was the puponic plague times.
Make her like half Puerto Rican two oh.
Yeah, and make the other half tie.
But uh, sequels reboots doesn't hurt the original to me. To me, same thing with music, if you want to go out on a new lead singer, like how many times how many bands are there where there's an album you don't like because the direction changed and you kind of just didn't follow with it.
Oh yeah, that happens all the time. Like and I'm I'm hurt the original I liked. Yeah, sure, you know. I'll tell you what. The only thing that hurts originals is when the artist goes on Joe Rogan and talks about how the Jews are a genocidal race of fucking demon nutters.
Not true. Because I was listening to a runaway in the car on the way home. That's my driving gen home from a doctor's visit.
So on a way that blues traveler.
No, it's Kanye West.
Oh, okay, that I was talking about Roger Waters. You were talking about the other anti semite who went on Joe Rogan and.
Yeah, the other one. I thought you're doing with Brett Weinstein for a second.
I was talking about the black anti semite who went on there.
Hey, you know what if a black guy from Chicago and a posh or I guess a poor British guy. What was he? It's not posh now either.
Roger Waters?
Yeah, was he working class?
I think he grew up not super Yeah, I guess he was.
He had to working class. Yeah, yeah, but dare.
His dad died and I think they that his mom was like a teacher and that they got money from the government and stuff. But I don't think that he grew up super poor. I think all the members of Pink Floyd, I think they met in an art school.
Okay, Okay, like Ozzie would talk about fucking you know, taping shoes and chea. They fucking poor, right.
He was a piece of ship.
Yeah, So if you can have those guys you know, the working class in England and the you know, poor part of southside of Chicago come together and go, we hate these people. I don't know, maybe there's a point.
Yeah, maybe they maybe or something to it, you know, former Union, you know, maybe come up with some sort of logo or something that signifies what you mean.
Take an old logo, repurpose it.
Dude. If people like had some real fucking initiative and some gumption and some drive and some ingenuity, that's what they would do is be like, Okay, here's how I want to reshape the world. How do I get my opposition? Like? How do I see this idea into my opposition? Right? Like, that's what I'd be doing. I'd be doing some fucking social engineering shit like that.
Not me. I'd be like, how can I seed the clouds? I need to control this weather?
I'd be like, how can I seed everyone in the crowd? Fucked?
There was something I was going to bring up to you, Oh.
Lincoln Park. You don't care about reboots? You know, the fucking artists for Jewish people, anti Semitism artists. Cool? Okay, Uh, it doesn't diminish the original.
And no, I think it was Rogan. I think I was gonna say something about Brett Weinstein.
Ah, he's a fucking idiot, would see.
Yeah, but you know what, he had a bunch of fucking hits and miss.
He looks like if Fred Savage from The Wonder Years, Like if you've just if the camera never stopped rolling after the last episode and his life just became a literal Truman show, that would be Fred Savage.
Now I okay, so here, let me give you a rundown. Ready.
Uh.
Brett thinks that aliens aren't real until he sees physical proof of them. Not a fan of that, Okay, just accept it. They're here with it, they walk amongst us. Brett breaks down things about the vaccine that actually do make sense.
Ding ding ding ding.
I like that. Then Brett goes on to say that polio is not real. I don't know about that.
Yeah. Uh did he really say that or did he say like we eliminated polio?
Like no, he he He explained an alternate theory that other people have had about what polio was at the time, not that polio doesn't exist.
Just that, but he subscribed.
That.
No, leave it or was he just elucidating it?
No? He was, I forget. I don't remember, honestly, I don't.
I just makes a difference, you know.
I remember, I remember thinking up these major bullet points because I was going to text it to you with like thumbs up and thumbs down and whatever and ship like that. He had one more that I really like. Oh he explained about the vaccines why the one part of it could be somewhat dangerous. And it's not so much that there's a problem with the vaccine. It was just people weren't trained properly. No, the one the one thing did make sense. The whatever. We'll talk about this
off air, we'll only talk about it. But there was one more WinStar thing. Fuck, what was the one more thing?
Oh dude? Was he implicated in that whole Harvey Weinstein thing?
No, oh no, no, no, no, no, no. Harvey just went to the fucking hospital today.
How was he going off to die?
I don't, I don't know. He might be let's see Harvey.
Oh dude, imagine all the folks who are gonna mourn the Harvey they knew and loved, you know, the guy. Everybody said, Oh, maybe he's a little too handsy with the girls, and maybe he likes to ejaculate on the gals before they get the part, and maybe he likes to fuck the girls in the ass before before you sign the contract with him and give him the roll.
One hour ago, Harvey Weinstein Weinstein Stein rushed from Rikers Island to hospital for emergency heart surgery.
He's oh, he's dead already. Yeah, Riker's Island, dude, I mean yeah, it's Peter Steele from a Typo negative. He went to Rikers Island for for some shit. I don't remember what the charges were, but yeah, then he died a couple of years later. Okay, okay, but you know, it takes a toll on you, man, It really catches up with you.
Interesting. Interesting. Fuck. What was the thing I was going to bring up to.
You, Beetlejuice? It was pretty good.
Oh okay, good to hear. No, it wasn't that though.
It wasn't that great. You're right, it had some good moments. I saw the play the musical Beetlejuice to play. So the movie I just watch is a musical.
No, it's a third story, I believe.
Oh shit, God, damn, I can't keep up up with all these stories.
Uh, it was all right. They have a fat guy play him though, so that's it was kind.
Of fat in the new movie. He had like a fucking fat stomach or whatever. It was cool.
No, I mean he's here like, this is him. He's just some fat guy. He's got a beard. Hey, shave your fucking beard. Man, what are you doing?
That looks like? Uh, it looks like a guy I work with.
I don't. I don't think it does. I don't think it's just a guy you work with. No, I didn't. I didn't. Actually I watched it in New York City.
What a shithole dump? I saw rocky horror picture so in New York City, did you? Yeah?
I hated it was that with skunk Pussy.
It was with skunk Pussy.
Yes, oh yeah, I can't do I can't do that shit. Uh like that trendy again, we're gonna talk about that in the Patreon I went and did like a like a ooh, this is what people in their early thirties and twenty four do or late thirties whatever. You know.
I count so much into doing I hate things, but I am I am into doing so when things look exciting to me, regardless of whether they're trendy or not, I want to do them. So it's how trendy they are impacts my enjoyment of them a lot of the time. So a lot of the times something will come out and I will want to partake in it and it'll be new, and so then there's a bunch of fucking people there, right, And then it's like when the axe
bar ope and here in Reno. I avoided that thing, like the fucking plague for a long time because everyone was always talking about axbar axbar axbar axe bar and sure enough, throwing axes. Yeah, you go and drink a bunch of alcohol and then you throw big metal, sharpened objects at a wall that bounces them back at you if you miss. It is genius. Is a genius idea. But yeah, I knew it was gonna be just fucking slammed, right, and I just wanted to go and show everybody how
good I was a throwing an axe. So I went. It was really fucking frustrating, and just like I knew, there was all these people there and they kept breaking my concentration. So the axe kept on not landing, and it would bounce back and almost hit everybody, and it got really embarrassed because normally I throw acts really good.
They have they have axe throwing at the porn convention.
What did they throw chicks fucking spread volva? No, I don't know why that it out of the air with their fucking labia.
I don't know why they have it there, but they have it, and it always terrifies me every year.
Like it's a it's a bad thing. It's like uh, air races or mutton busting. Is mutton busting it's when you take like a baby animal that like a like a baby cow or a baby big horn sheep or something after this, after that, and then you let it. It's it's basically like when you go to a rodeo.
In between the rounds, they'll have like a kid come out or a bunch of kids come out, and they'll chase a baby animal around, right, But what ends up happening inevitably is that the baby cow runs way faster than all the six year olds that were sent out there by their grandparents to chase this thing, and they end up getting trampled like on their they fucking get their heads stepped on and ship by these fucking mutton which I believe is a sheep, a baby sheep, and
they just get like a bunch of brain damage and shit and then they go and you know, create the political future of the country for the next thirty years because they're demographic of the voting public.
Uh we uh. We had to go in the other day for Jen's deposition. Right, Oh god, what did she do? Killed someone?
Oh?
No, uh, but we had to go in. She was fooling. She got hit by the bus two years ago.
That's right, that woman who worked for the bus company ran her over with the bus.
Yeah, runder over, no t bonder car going through stuff. We watched the video. Okay, so here's the thing.
Oh, you got to see a video.
We had to see the woman's dash cam video facing out of her plowing into Gen.
So you saw her pov essentially.
A little too high up. You could just see the top of Gen's car. Unfortunately, I wish it was just at the front of the fucking shoe bus.
Yeah no, if her head was busted through the if her head was busted through the ceiling of the car.
Right, No, it was mounted to the dashboard.
Her cam was mounted to Yes. Oh so like if you're sitting on the wheel with your head on the wheel.
Yeah, exactly, Like you can't really see that well, you can kind of see like the top and like what you're trying to read the sticker. That's true. Uh so fucking yeah. We saw the video and Jen had to like give a three hour fucking recounting of everything she remembers, and she kind of paint in the second half. She did, and I told her to say, oh good, Hell, I realized how good of a fucking victim I would be. I would be so good of a victim. Okay, Jen
wants to sit there at the crisis. Jen sits there and just tells the truth the whole time.
Okay, dude, you gotta lie and make it way scarier and more victimized.
Her whole thing was like, so they said, the guy's like, tell me you know what happened, Tell me what happened. And Jen has to say this word. I called her the inWORD. Uh careful about that?
Why? Uh?
Jen has to say this? I left my house. I was going straight on this road. I noticed the bus coming up to the stop sign. It never stopped at the stop sign. Hits me in the side. That was the next thing I knew okay. Yeah, Jen is like I left the house and I went up the road and got hit by a bus. And it's like no, no, no, we need you to recount this, Like he's not the lawyers like trying to walk us through.
It, but he's not storyteller.
Eas yes, one hundred, that's the problem. Yeah, yeah, prep for that day, folks, when Shane can't record and I have to hop on here with Jen and it's just me going, you gotta say something.
You didn't prep her for that beforehand, and like Walker, like try and do your best, like I try her.
You know what it is, it's anxiety, and she yeah, the whole.
Time, like in the moment, it's impossible. Yeah, told me the entire time.
Her chest feels tight, she feels hot, she feels like scared, like she doesn't she's thinking of all the scary dress where she could do something wrong. Well I didn't, haven't it And she's got some her casette left over, but I don't know that that would have worked.
That would have made her feel confident.
She probably would. So how are you feeling it's injury. I'm feeling fucking great.
I feel so good now that I got injured.
They offer us two grand She's doing fine. Look, she's smiling the whole time.
So the attorney's walking her through this thing. Are they like being aggressive? Are they being like gentle and sweet?
No? But I worry that they thought they had a better case and then they may have seen her ability to deliver on the stand. Uh, which is all you're doing. You're doing these depositions. You're seeing how well you're going to be able to pitch your case to a jury.
Well, okay, so how did the video look, Because it's you're right, they got to pitch the case to the jury. But the testimony is just one aspect of this, right, Like what the video show.
Video showed more of a rolling stop than I had thought. Actually for the bus, remember yeah maybe, oh yeah, she was totally in the wrong, but I thought she blew straight through the stop sign. She did like slow down the stop sign and then continue on and plow right into the side of jen.
I feel like that's even more inexcusable, right, Like, she just got to go in through the motions, right like, and a good lawyer is going to know how to how to spin this, right, But think about it, It's like the rule is you come to a complete stop for a reason. And this bitch, she is the she's proving the point, right, like you come to a complete stop because you're not getting the full frame of you.
He'll read it out of the DMV handbook. What doesn't matter, right, right, But the point, the point is like if she had just blown through, as a as her attorney, the murderer, the attempted murderer, I would I would be saying, like, look, she just blew through. She didn't see the stop sign. You know, it was obstructed by a kid's backpack, which you could you know, he was swinging it around. You can't see it because it's off camera. Like I would
be building a case around that. But it's like, oh no, she knew the stop sign was there.
She there's a video of this. The stop sign is prominently displayed in the video too, and it's a slow down, keep going. Glass explodes, you know.
Yeah, idiot, that woman. She should have known. If I have a dash can on here, they're going to see how bad of a driver I am, and then the companies don't have to pay out, you know, two thousand dollars to this white lady.
I was looking this one person got twelve million dollars. It's fucked up. Actually, shit, these these two kids died. This is what tells you the legal system is fucked right, this school bus driver not in gens accident, two kids died. Yeah, how much money am I getting?
That'd be so funny if they're the two kids who died. It's like, hey, you know, like the parents sign a contract every year when the kids get on the school bus. It's like it's part of like being in the school. Like I have to sign contracts all the time, Like do you want do you give the teachers permission to be around the kids when they go on field trips? Do you give your kid permission to leave for field trips?
To see this video? All this shit substitutes to be around your kid, all this stuff, different things you have to sign off for. I would just assume, like if your kid dies in a school bus crash, like shit out of luck.
You know you can't see that there's a thousand dollars penalty for the school, they just pay pay you one thousand dollars. It'll cover one of those cardboard bucks. Yeah yeah, run by the school. Yeah. So but just just again, these guys were trying to coach her in how to say the truth everything they were telling her. Say the truth, but you have to say it in a way that
you know makes sense. And she just didn't get it, and I kept having to go like, look, like the other part was so Jen, the anxiety makes her not want to talk and whatever. They go when we get to the part about how it has affected you, talk as much as you want, talk as much as you can tell them every little detail. Remember, we want to make the point that this has profoundly affected your life. Blah blah blah. And Jen goes like Jen go's like, I get real tired sometimes and we can't. We don't.
We don't get to hang out as much anymore. And I'm like, yo, if you say that you're gonna there, gonna take they're gonna take our fucking cars if you do that, Like we're.
Gonna come here and take the cars.
Yeah, yeah, they're gonna hate things for us.
We do say, Look, we wasted all their time, like preparing this deposition, We wasted at least three hours talking. They're gonna come here, make us drive them around for three hours.
Yeah. So it's like, I don't know, do people don't know you. You may talk about this and that and whatever, but you have it. Do people not have that? I feel like you have that ability to perform. Do you if you have to go talk in front of a crowd of people, if you had to.
The thing I was thinking about this very recently, I am really good at performing in certain regards, right, So, like there's certain things I feel like I'm really prepared to do, and there's so performing I've said this before, and I think this. I used to think this was true with everybody, but I'm starting to realize that this is this is more of a me thing. Or maybe this is for a person who's got some trauma or
some baggage to unpack. But I used to think or I like this line from American Psycho where it's like we all wear masks, right, right, And it's like everybody is always wearing a mask. And I always identified with that because I am this kind of person who in my life who no matter who I'm around, I can always shift my personality slightly. It's kind of like what I always consider being a chameleon to where I can blend in with different friend groups, different mindsets, like I'm
i naturally. It's like I realize, like, Okay, I'm stuck with these people. I have to make myself one of them, and I do it easily. But at the same time, when I'm made to perform, you know, like when I have to put on a different persona, that is fucking difficult. It's really hard to fake my emotions. You're probably going to know if I'm mad most of the time, you know, sure, because I'll be telling you like things that will express to you I'm mad, or I'll be like I'll be
getting agitated, or I'll be avoiding you. But like there's there's signs, right. But the thing about that, like that's star ship? What was it? Where was I going with that? What was your initial question? Uh?
Okay, let me let me rephrase it in a way. In social positions.
How do I perform? Yeah, so I feel like when I am when I'm in my element, when I'm doing something that I feel really really confident in and I'm like in the right headspace. Yes, but if I'm caught off guard or so, performing could be like an impromptu speech, right, or performing could be like for me at least performing could be given like this show of affection or like a very public interaction where I'm expected to match a person.
You know, it's like someone's grieving or somebody is overly joyful or whatever, and they are like interacting with me and expecting me to either talk back. You know. It's conversations are two way, right, Like they're not just one way streets. It's like, I feel like that's a performance because I'm not I feel like anything I do, whether it's like oh it'll be okay, or if I try and hug at like I'm completely unskilled in doing any
of that right. So I feel like that's essentially like that situation and a lot of other situations for me. It's like if if I got a role in a play and I had never acted before, Like I had never been in a play, I had never watched any behind the scenes, and then I show up day one lead role, and they they're like, okay, where's your script. Let's let's start rolling over scene one. And I'm like, Oh, I thought you were going to just give me the script today, you know, Like I thought I thought I
was just gonna learn here on the spot. Like that's what that's kind of like for me. I'm just I'm so fucking unprepared. So that's my worst fear of performance. But yeah, any other kind of performance, and I'm sure I could learn to get better with those situations. I'm working on it, But any other kind of performance, like, I feel like I can adapt and work and then once I feel I'm in my element, I like to perform. I like when I do good and people see I'm doing a good job, and I like so it doesn't
have to be like flashy and showy. I just like to be performing in whatever I'm doing. You know, I want to be the best at whatever I'm doing. That's performance for me.
Yeah, I I live for that shit Like, hey, we need someone to do this, step up real quick and do this.
And that's how you get fucking asked to do everything too.
I yeah, but I don't. I wish people would fucking ask me to do more. So, hey, can you read it at my wedding? Yeah? Sure, fuck I'll do that.
Oh you socially? Okay, I don't know what do you mean?
Wait? What do you mean? Wait? What would be the difference?
I mean, okay, maybe maybe that's like because that's something important to you, but I would like.
Well, i'd do it at a random person. I don't give a fuck.
It's just I wouldn't want to make Yeah, that's not fun to me. I don't want someone to come to me and be like, oh, let me pay you a lot of money to, uh, you know, do re rewrite this smut for me or something, you know, like get me, get me doing something I enjoy and and pay me lots of money for it.
Yeah.
And I'm gonna, dude, I'm gonna make you the happiest smut in the fucking universe. Man, I promise you. I'm gonna make you happy. I'm gonna bend over backwards for you.
That's like the First Amendment covering good positive friendly speech. It's like, yeah, okay, if you pay me a lot of money to do something I really like, well good, So if you're going to pull my leg on it, I guess so do that. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, I get that. I like like.
My you could be praise, though, praise could be that for me, praise could be money.
My aunt started crying just before my uncle's funeral and just handed me pieces of loose leave and said, I can't read this. I can't read this, so I had to go up and do the eulogy.
I guess, I guess I'm throwing it in the waistbind then.
Huh, yeah, I guess he ain't getting one. Huh. No, I guess loved it.
I'll go put in his casket for him.
I remember at my dad's funeral, all my family members were like crying, and I went up there, boom, straight face. I was good. I faked like I was gonna. I was tearing up at one point because I had to cough, but I was just like resituating the hair in my throat.
So you were, you were performing.
I'm I feel like I'm always I don't know who I am anymore. I mean, quite honestly, I don't since college.
No, I feel like I'm always performing in a sense too, and I'm trying to, Like, I feel like that's kind of one of my hindrances to not being like more in the moment, not being more relaxed, not being more having less anxiety, is that I feel like my life is like a rush to not really get anywhere. It's just like a rush to perform well, and it's like it's starting to stress me out, you know, And I want to just kind of like I just want to just kind of just breathe. You know, I'm not saying
that you're unhealthy or anything. I'm just saying, oh, no, maybe that's not Maybe that's not the best way to approach everything.
Chest pains all the time. I always have chest pains.
Oh well that could just be your diet.
No, no, no, just from long hours, no sleeve, staring at screens for hours and hours and hours, getting all fucked up and then just try hard. It's just it's all. That's a lot, man, it's a lot. My sleep is fucked getting these alerts on my Apple Watch telling me my beats per minute fall below forty for ten minutes.
That's one of those.
Yeah, I've read that if you're one of those super athletes, that's a good thing. What happens if you're a big fat fuck.
Well, dude, you've been on this workout journey, maybe you've turned into a super athletes, haven't tested.
I've just I've just been eating no food or meat. I have not worked out once. My bones heard every day.
Oh that's just because you're not fucking using them enough. Man.
I'll tell you what. I've been crushing. Diet coke lately, like there's been I've gone a few days not diet coke zero. First off, I.
Think they're both bad.
They're not. You can't drink normal coke as much as I have been drinking it. I can't drink normal coke as much as I've been drinking coke.
All right, Well, just put the sugar and they get the sugar. Put in the coal, pure cane sugar in with it. Sure that was the same as the Mexican coat they used to cane.
Some kind of cane hoke.
No, you don't buy the coke bottles I get as pure cane sugar cool.
I give a fuck.
It's it's not even the cane sugar that makes it better. You know what it is. It's the It's the glass bottle, it really is.
Yeah, yeah, really, I had a glass bottle of Squirt for a while.
Oh dude, I wish they dude Squirt. Hire me. I will work for you. I will just make you bottles like you don't even have to hire me at the factory. I'll send you I'll pay postage and everything. I'll make the squirt here and send it to you.
Go to your worst friend dot com. Uh follow us everywhere on Twitter and Instagram. At worst friend Cast, most importantly Patreon patreon dot com s worst friend Cast, you get a bonus episode every week and access to everything ever recorded, entirely commercial free. Today we're gonna be talking about my big day out finally.
Yeah, I'm gonna fucking have to hear about this because Matt is a fucking so he was just talking about all this social shit. He's a fucking lunatics. I sometimes I think I'm the weird one. I think I'm weird because like, oh, I'm antisocial, and I don't want to go out and do weird stuff with people, and I don't want to have these fucking weird fantasies where I read a speech at my fucking best friend's wake slash anniversary wedding. It's like it's his second anniversary with his
first girlfriend, but his thirteenth anniversary to his wife. He's renewing his vows with and we're burying him today. Let me read the speech. I'm really excited about that. Please tell us all about that.
I one hundred percent sit on the floor in the shower sometimes and write speeches in my head.
Oh I do too, but They're usually like, oh, how do I suicide letters? No, they're usually now their excuses for problems I don't have yet, but I'm assuming I will soon tell it.
Hey, hey, I think the only reason I am so good at like seeing the paths and this and that is just because I have a good memory. Because when I have any moment of downtime, all I'm thinking about is like, well, here's what I would do if a deer hit me and the fucking antler came through and it pierced my side but not my no major organs, but definitely like rib damage on the outside. What would I do from there? I sit around and just think about that shit.
First, I'd break the antler off and leave the fucking carcass in my car, and if it would start, i'd drive it. If it wouldn't start.
I'd push it.
I'd push it to the hospital with the antler inside me because I don't want to spring a leak.
Yeah, exactly, Yes, that's one scenario. The other one is I would probably just start tearing up and die. Sir, this isn't a fatal injury. Just leave me here, It's okay.
Have you ever been overwhelmed with pain just like you just get rock so bad.
It doesn't happen for a lot of people. Wisdom teeth was the worst pain I've ever had in my life. I was on the floor in my mom's kitchen like banging my fists, like crying, I'm fucking dying air.
How about like like one of those real, like just insane jolts of pain where it's just like you you could get hit in there with a baseball. I've got a baseball.
See that goes to me, that goes numb.
Okay, but you know that feeling right like that shock like where it's like whoa, you know, and then it's like the pain sets in more slowly, but it's definitely there that you can tell like, fuck, this is going to be bad. That thought when you have that thought, like holy shit that when you cut your face glass bottle.
Oh you know what I've done.
This is going to be so bad.
I've done a bread knife into my hand. Actually, you too, You wanted to record or something. You were drunk as fuck. This was a couple of years ago, and I say you were like you were texting me like I'm sorry, and I was like, hey, you don't have to be sorry. You were angrily yelling nice things back and forth. I was like, I just need you to be my friend.
And then you said something and I went to go cut something, and I sent you a picture because you were like, well's throwing your piss now, won't respond again. You were drunk, and I'm sent you a picture just my hand covered in blood. But I know exactly what you mean. I have no idea how we got here. But it was a serrated knife. It was brand new from Amazon, and I watched it go into my finger
and I felt the metal go through my finger. No pain yet though, and then it just turned and it just went oh wow, oh wow.
Yeah. Well that's that's the I don't know what we were talking about either, initially, uh, but that's the kind of ship where it's like that kind of that like pain, it's like if you fuck. We were talking about something in particular that led up to that particular sensation and
that feeling. I forget what it was. Maybe we'll talk about it on the Patreon, but sure, if you if you've been following the thread this far, folks, maybe you can you know, suss that out, pan it out, fuck it out, flesh it out squirt it on the fucking comments and let us know because I don't know. I feel don't even like this show. I like it one where we talked to pussy.
Your Worst friend dot com, Worst Friend Cast on Twitter and Instagram, Patreon dot com, sace worst Friend Cast for your Worst Friend of ment.
Uh, I'm going to figure out we were talking about.
Thanks for listening, We'll see you next week. You don't follow us all Crum really gonna miss you talk in the show's over.