hello hello hello welcome back to you right now alone our topic today is on body dysmorphia and we have interviewed alex chaparro who is a personal trainer my name is cena my name is brandon my name's cheyenne i'm will nice to meet you so today's episode is going to be formatted the same way as last time uh so we're just going to be playing the questions off of here and then just kind of bouncing off conversations from alex japal's answers so to introduce our guest which cena
interviewed um we're just going to play back some of his audio all right guys so my name is alex carl and i'm 24 years old and i'm online fitness coach and i help you know men and women get in the best shape possible and build confidence and that's kind of what i've been doing for the past six months now it's something that i uh something new that i just took online but i was a personal trainer at a gym for about six months i didn't like it and decided to take everything online
and it's been you know very impactful be able to help as many people and it's something that i get a lot of fulfillment out of awesome so let's get started with the first question how much of an impact does working out or general exercise have for your mental health uh honestly man it's helped tremendously you know i mean even last year and you know during covert we you know how jim shut down and everything i think that's when it really it was like that moment of realization i
didn't realize how much uh my mental health was benefiting from the gym because i kind of like i fell into some slight depression you know what i mean you know during those times i you know didn't work out i gained a lot of weight and my mental health was just not up to par right so when things started opening up i didn't realize like how much it was like an escape you know what i mean and how much it really helped you know relieve that stress and clear my head
and it's something that i think everyone should incorporate i mean some sort of exercise into their you know daily routine i got i gotta agree with them when everything did shut down because of covid like i who i've been working out for about eight years now and when i lost what i enjoy to do it really affected me and like you try to do different things right you try to do the workouts at home you try to figure out other things to do outside like you tried to figure out something to keep
you motivated but it was like it just never felt the same as going to the gym and i know there's a lot of people out there who found new things and that's awesome for them but for me who who personally loves weightlifting it was just something that i just couldn't like match up to par as weightlifting did to me you know like i had different i tried to run not the best runner i tried to do different sports i just it just didn't ever feel the same again did it did it feel the same for anybody else
yeah i got hella depressed you did it sucked you know going from like working out not like necessarily every day but like every day you know since like high school and then all of a sudden it's close like what do you do like i was mentally screwed up for a while so so much so that after like six months i couldn't take it anymore i went and bought like a whole home gym equipment i couldn't take it anymore like i couldn't transition well i needed like the gym
that that's how much like i love the gym yeah and i think for for me i used to go to the gym and play basketball all the time and when covid was you know hitting at its worth worst in the beginning a lot of gyms close especially with contact sports with contact anything really i mean everything was shut down in general but um that really stunted kind of my workouts that i did because i i wasn't somebody who would go to the gym so so much so regularly so that like i would
like do regular workouts i would just go there get my cardio in play some basketball and um yeah when cope when coveted came through it was just it just stopped it halted all that for me pretty much said the same thing too cheyenne uh when all the gyms closed because i think during that time i was over in the city staying there for a while um it just kind of sucked just being stuck inside all the time because i know like over in chicago uh they put like an enforcement out they couldn't be at a
certain time if you're caught at a certain time you would get fined and the final was honestly ridiculous but like sucks i don't know it was terrible there was some that i heard it was ran up like close like 200 it was crazy but like just not able to go to the gym because like i'm not the type of person who doesn't work out as you can see on my body but like but like i would do just basically kind of like running just be running down down the court working like my one two work
uh my type and all that type of stuff and it's just like when that was taken away from me it was just more just what do i do now i just sat there inside pondered and then over time like kind of just diminished my mind little by little and kind of like almost drove me to a little bit of insanity because i was like i couldn't do this anymore because like as humans like we want to be able to do things we wanted to get out go outside able to move around be free but just being
isolated into one it's just it's just not it wasn't it honestly it wasn't it nah and that totally makes sense and then we'll get to the next question how does someone find the right form of exercise to help better their mental health so i think that choosing you know obviously there's different formats of exercise and it all comes down to you know what you really enjoy the most right because i think i mean cardio and strength training they both release endorphins right they they give you the
uplifting mood they clear that head and relieve that stress so kind of you know find what works best for you right so whether that be you know doing only like 30 minutes of cardio or strength training you want to mean boxing it could be anything any type of sort of exercise um that would kind of like i said release those endorphins and kind of you know clear that head space and i think a lot of people will benefit a lot from that you know this is this is one of the most
important things to understand as people who enjoy working out you gotta find what works best for you or i like to say your cup of tea because i might like green tea he might like black tea he might like a different type of tea we all we all like you may not even like tea to be honest however what works for me might not work for you i love weightlifting might not work for you i know people who run i hate running i'm i absolutely despite running it's not it's not the
at all the workout for me but i know people who get the runners high and they say it's absolutely something i just can't get over i love it so much and that's awesome because finding your own cup of tea is one of the most powerful pushes of not only your mental health but finding an awesome exercise for yourself something that you find new something that you might like to do yeah there's a lot out there there so much there's so many different types of exercises
that i i could sit here and name them off for at least i can't okay i can't name them off but um there's just so many out there and you just gotta find what's right for you just keep trying just don't stop trying like if weightlifting sucks fine running sucks fine swimming sucks fine just just find your cup of tea that's going to be my last point i think that's well said so we'll get into the next question and we asked him so can you create certain exercise routines to battle certain disorders
does cardio work better weight lifting and so on i guess i would like to put in more like a general category because like i said i haven't really had experience with like power lifting or olympic lifting like you were saying um but i think any some sort of physical activity um and kind of incorporating that and kind of trial through error right so if string training is something that you really don't gratitude towards don't really enjoy as much then maybe do some cardio
maybe do some boxing um you know like i said there's different activities that you can experiment with and just kind of see what brings the most fulfillment i think that's what's the most important thing you know what i mean because if you're forcing yourself to work out let's say power lift and if you're not really enjoying that then you're really it's really not going to do any good for you right you're really not enjoying it it's not really like an escape so it's
going to do more harm than good so i would say my biggest advice would be kind of you know don't be afraid to experiment you know what i mean go out there and try new things and see what works best for you and kind of what helps out like you might not like it or like the idea of running right but if you go with a squad of like six or seven of your friends like maybe you talk the whole time you don't even think about the running you know or you could still hate it you're not
going to know if you don't try it but in my experience with weightlifting i would never have started if i didn't have friends who liked weightlifting you know i was not necessarily afraid of the gym but i didn't know what i was doing and then in that aspect i was afraid i probably wouldn't have gone if i didn't start going with friends no and also if you find the wrong exercise for yourself and keep forcing yourself to do things like that then you're going to start getting a worse
mental health because you're going to convince yourself that you don't want to go and do that workout which is going to force you not to go and do exercises which is just going to make your mental health just stabilize yeah it's going to compound in your head yeah and it's not going gonna and you're just gonna be stuck there the last thing you want to do is get stuck no one likes to be stuck we'll be out i'm going on to the next question cool so the next question we
asked him is how would you tell somebody that if they're afraid to be judged at the gym how do i get over that how do you take away that thought of hey everybody's eyes are going to be on me i don't want to go yeah of course of course so i mean i'm the biggest thing i want to put out here is just that it takes you know take it day by day right i mean we all when we all start off we have that gym inside it's completely normal i mean we're obviously trying something new that
we're not used to so there's a lot of fear behind that right especially with gym intimidation right like what are people think of me um you know what are they gonna say so you have all these thoughts that are just cramming into your head are just making a lot worse so i mean one of my biggest advice of a few is actually just you know go with a friend you know something simple as going with someone who is going to help push you and motivate you you know what i mean and then also becoming be
prepared when going to the gym right so don't go in there not having a plan right so going in there having a structured workout plan and knowing exactly what you need to do and then just execute that you know another thing that helped me when i started off because i can relate to that before getting into a big corporate gym uh what i did was i started off actually at a small gym right so i found the smallest gym that i could find and i would work out there for about three to
four months until i felt you know mentally ready to actually step out of my comfort zone and actually go into a bigger gym um because you know you're when you when you go to a new gym you're gonna see a lot of people be staring at you you might think that you're not performing a certain exercise right uh but you know the biggest advice i could give is just start right you know go in there and do your absolute best and like i said have a gym partner you know what
i mean go have a plan you know i mean if if going late at later times you know whether that be first thing in the morning or going really late at night whatever is really going to help you you know take that first step you know what i mean because it's not easy i think everyone should be you know incorporating some sort of physical activity but don't let you know others people's thoughts and stuff like that get in the way because i promise you we all saw it from somewhere right
um and like i said just circle you know surround yourself with people who are gonna you know uplift you and motivate you and you know help you take your fitness stream to the next level you know what i mean and just obviously the first step is getting into the gym so yeah that's kind of one of my biggest takeaways from that so you know what my favorite one of my favorite pictures is there was this guy who was um i would say over not overly obese but he knew that
it was people would have eyes on him and he would go with one of his friends and his friend would dress up in crazy costumes i've seen that you've seen that right and other people's eyes would be on the guy in the crazy costume and not the man who was overly obese working out you know and like he said going with a friend can really change a lot because when i i could say that me working out with my friends gives me more motivation to work out even harder because it's it's not like you it's not
like a comparing you and your friend it's more like kind of like a competition it makes it a little bit more fun it makes it a little bit more exciting it makes it just feel like it's not all eyes are on me oh all of my workouts all everyone's staring at me and that's what's important is don't allow yourself to overthink and push yourself out of your workouts but enjoy what you're doing because again this is something that's good for your mental health it's it's supposed to help
and it will help if you can just focus yeah realistically the people who you know most of the time it's when you're going to the gym for the first time you're afraid of people who have been there for a long time you know what they might be thinking you know again eyes on me realistically 99 of people 99.9 percent of people do not care they are more excited to see you in the gym whether you're uh struggling with you you're overweight you're underweight you have a disability they they
even me like i seek encouragement from those people when i see them at the gym they are there making a change for themselves and you know just like i am it's incredibly motivating and even like you know when those people ask questions uh don't be afraid of that like that people love 99.9 of the time to answer those questions it makes them feel good about themselves too you know not just because they're helping you but because like hey you you know they feel like wow you you came to
me for a question out of everybody here like people love to see everybody in the gym you know there might be that one guy every now and then but nobody likes that guy [ __ ] that guy i might i might disagree i'm gonna disagree with will right here a little bit i'm not i won't say it's 99.9 i
would say it's more 80 20. i have seen people at the gym who are overly confident very when when they see somebody at the gym that's may not know what they're doing they get they laugh at them in their head because they're like oh this person's trying to do this workout and look at the way he's doing it but those kind of people are so over egotistical that that for them to do that is because they're jealous of themselves or it's something else that's going on in their
head that's making them do that it's not you and don't allow that to hurt you but allow that to fuel you um i i've i've been laughed at in the gym i'm not gonna lie oh yeah in the beginning i i didn't know what i was doing half the time and it's hard because you're scared to go ask a question so you're gonna try to do the workout but you're doing the workout wrong and i've seen people point i've seen people i've seen it i'm not i'm not going to sit here and lie to you
about like oh the gym is a happy fairy fairy tale of a place and no one's judging each other no people people do people do but [ __ ] those people they're dicks i agree [ __ ] those people that's what i'm saying in terms of those statistics though you do go to like a bigger gym i do i go to a very small like community-friendly gym so like yeah it seems very different so just go to smaller gyms yeah like just like alex said like start off if you're afraid start off at a smaller gym like
people there like everybody tends to like like i don't know everybody but like everybody you know knows each other like it's like i've seen that guy here like he's nice or see that girl here like she's nice you know yeah no i'm michael i completely agree with you on that point though it was kind of crazy um now that you said that uh first well i'm gonna start off with you uh kind of like saying like first going off like to the gym um i remember this was back in college
my freshman year at college i remember when i first went to the rec center uh that's basically it's that's how your excellent is basically everything's in there but i remember going alone so when i went alone i didn't know anybody there and that was honestly like the most frightening task ever because even before i even left i would always go to the gym with my friends at the same time the community rec center right so then like that was basically kind of like my
safe haven you know i'm with the guys i'm having fun i'm working out basically doing everything with them but then once when i left and i went down there it was so different i just felt so alone so like usually like my coping way was i'm just gonna throw on headphones i shot around things like that i did that for maybe like a month straight and then i just decided that you know what like i'm gonna go without headphones because i'm gonna try to see i try to interact with
people so i still went try to interact um nobody really didn't say anything but like at the same time like i was not going to let that bring me down or like let that affect my mental health because like you know what one day someone's gonna you know find the bright within me and be like you know what this kid you know he's out here he's working but at the same time like you know like wants to be friends as well so maybe like a week later i found my first friend there and basically like we
started going to the gym together on a daily and then after that we started hooping together which it was fun but even before i met him too cena as you said um when going into the weight room and then basically like as someone like that basically that 20 person who's basically a dick and it just like kind of makes fun of people um i actually had that experience so like i was basically doing uh the one when you sit down those are the butterflies when you go like this
right yes so i was doing the butterflies and basically like i don't know what i was doing this i didn't even know what i was doing so i was doing it incorrectly and like in the corner of my eye i could tell the guy was staring the whole time like so then i basically made eye contact and just stared at him when i was doing my workout and basically like he was giving me this face that kind of like oh like basically what are you doing like you're doing it all wrong like basically trying
to like shun me down i'm just like okay whatever so like at first it did affect me but then in the end like maybe like couple minutes later i was like you know what i was like i thought to myself everybody has been at one point in time in the beginning stages where they're doing everything wrong and so you know for him to be laughing i just thought to myself at one point in time you were doing it wrong too so i don't know why you here laughing or trying to like bring me down and all
that type of true as [ __ ] that's what i'm sorry language but like hey hey if you are that dick in the gym and you do see somebody doing a workout wrong go up to them and just be like hey dude like i see you doing it like this i do it like this i just want to express how what the kind of workout i'm doing i just wanted to make sure you don't injure yourself like because i've injured myself plenty of times doing the wrong workout but if you are that dick it's it's not okay to be the dick
and i don't want to come here and tell you to continuously be the dick but these some people just don't know what they're doing man and sometimes it's better to help than to laugh be the bigger person be the bigger person man it's not it's not hard i know you can do it so and then maybe this is how the frog turns into the prince i guess because he stops being a dick and becomes a better person that helps other people yeah you know who knows and then with our next question uh we asked him
as a personal trainer you have many clients you see a lot of people right what are some things you tell them kindly to get over their fears in the gym or in these kinds of public situations where you are working now so one thing that i always you know when i have a consultation with my clients and i kind of go over the game plan um something that i ask him is you know what is your why right why are you doing this you know what i mean so let's say block everything else right forget what
people are going to think forget about the gym forget about that but ask yourself like why are you doing this what's your purpose behind working out right and really journal that down write that down and really visualize that right and i think by doing that you really get clear-headed right you're like okay you know what like i'm doing this for me right who cares what people think um i know it's not going to be easy but you know i'm going to take that first step
right because like i said it you got to take action right so that's kind of what my piece of advice would be is can i ask yourself why you know if you're if you're starting off and you're afraid of what people are going to think you know you block all that you know what i mean just focus on your purpose focus on why you want to do something right and why you want to accomplish a certain goal and then you take actionable steps when obviously surrounding yourself with people that
are going to help you right whether that be doing extensive research online not necessarily hiring a coach right but if you need to go online on youtube there's a lot of great resources that are going to help you um you know make that first step right because even though it may feel like you're alone you're not you're not alone right so i think we can definitely there's there's going to be obstacles but i think there's a lot of solutions to that so i think if you're
you know starting off you know ask yourself why you're doing it i think that's the most important thing is finding your why yes and that's for anything but yes specifically just like he said finding your why and especially for me finding my why in it the best way to find your why or the best way to phrase your why is put it in terms of yourself and not in comparison to others like why do why do i want to look a certain way uh it's because i want to be healthier it's
not because i want to show off to people it's not because this or that comparing to other people when you when your why is internal and it's for yourself that why is so much better and it will drive you and it will drive whatever you're doing workouts basketball uh on sports related anything just figure it out i mean it's a lot of self awareness and understanding who you are and what you want in the end figuring out what you want in life whether it's self-confidence whether
it's sure bigger muscles abs whatever you personally feel is a goal to achieve you can do it just don't allow yourself to overthink and to pull yourself out of that feeling of oh man i just i can't go to the gym because of this i can't go to the gym just focus on your why just like alex said and you'll get there you need shiloh buff in here just do it just do it but just like just like he said to you know if you're afraid of talking to people in that aspect start on youtube
like that's a big number one with how i started it was figuring out things other than going with friends it was when i wanted to learn something i'd look it up on youtube like if i didn't have anybody with me like that that is 100 a very good way of doing things you have the internet you do the next question we asked him is for the people who are starting at the gym especially the people who are afraid to be social and have a conversation in the gym what are some things that you
would tell someone who wants to go to a personal trainer but just doesn't know how yeah so like i said something has a friendly chit chat you know what i mean not not right off the bat you're trying to say i need a i need a trainer let me hire you uh but just kind of build that rapport with that trainer whoever you're looking to you know hire on to how to help you take that next step in your journey right so whether they be on social media you know shoot them a
message keep up with their content see uh if you know how genuine person they are if you think that they can help you reach their goals and if you feel that you don't feel like that then just uh like i said maybe reach out a little bit but just some simple like message dms can can go a long way but it doesn't necessarily have to be like hey i need to get in shape right it all starts with with trust right i think that's an important thing especially when you're
going to hire a coach i think you you look for someone who's going to help you out and be able to build that trust with right i think that's the most important thing because if you don't trust that person to get you the results then you know what i mean that's a whole different story so i would say like i said just simple steps build rapport with that uh with that trainer or whoever you're looking to hire on whether it be online as well and yeah and just keep it like that and
just take those small actionable steps to get there and like alex said small steps is what starts everything these small steps the conversations that you need to have just going up and saying hi just figuring out what works for you just and if you're afraid to talk to them maybe have a friend go up and talk to them for you and me and that's not that's not the worst thing in the world but i personally think if you take the small steps and just ask him a question i don't understand like how
bad asking a question is because even if it's a stupid question i've i haven't i've been asked plenty of stupid questions at the gym i'm not gonna lie to you but there's nothing wrong with stupid questions i just think that we're so we start overthinking these questions and that's when we start getting nervous and that's when we lose the fa the feeling of i just i need to i can't do that i can't do this i can't be like that when a personal trainer is there to help you
and it's to be able to trust and i promise you i every personal trainer has probably heard the craziest questions so how crazy could your cause how crazy could your question really be the next question we asked him is is there such thing as working out too much has this happened to you what would you categorize as being in the gym too often yeah so the the biggest thing is obviously listen to your body right if you're feeling sore you're feeling like you just can't you know work out the
next day then don't do it right kind of take yourself a rest day give yourself time to rest because i mean as more of an advanced you know lifter um you kind of get in this mindset where like i need to train every single day right but then you kind of get to a point where you're like you know what it's like let's train smart right let's train smart and hard but let's kind of calculate when our rest days uh how many rest days we need throughout the week because it is
important right it is very important that we allow allow our bodies to get the appropriate rest time right um so that way we're able to perform even better um when we go to the gym again because you know it's it's happened to me too where i i live seven days a week and then you know what my body's just like defeated right i'm like okay i i need to take a little bit of break right because let's say you decide to be stubborn and continue working out that's where injuries come in right you don't
want to do that you don't let your muscles repair like the way they need to and obviously nutrition plays a huge role um and sleep so kind of listening to your body i think that's the biggest thing is listening to your body and even though you feel like okay i don't want to take a rest day because like i love hitting the gym it's so good for my mental health it's just i don't like being home alone i think kind of like planning out your week and then kind of being disciplined right kind of
sticking with a consistent schedule figure out what works best for you and allow your your body to get that rest that it needs because it is it's very important and learn when to turn off that on and off switch rest is key rest is key your body needs rest to form the muscles that you just worked so hard to in the gym your body needs rest because at that time rest allows it to repair i mean i think it's it's the same thing with basketball wouldn't it if you don't have the rest
you're gonna feel sore your shots are gonna get off you won't be able to make that three point because your arm just can't get to that point of where it was shooting yeah there's a big difference but it's still at the same time the same thing like as in like weightlifting is so different than basketball right but the same aspect applies i think it's relatable with anything like not just exercise like if you keep on doing the same thing and being like overly consistent with something you
just kind of get used to it or your body gets used to it and you know it you just your your progress just really plateaus and it just you know it's it it's just you you almost don't do yourself any favors when you overdo something in a specific category so you always need to take that break take that rest period in order for yourself to either reflect on what you've you've done what you could do better let your muscles heal so that you can continue to grow them but i mean
i think with anything in life you can apply that yeah no your brain needs rest your brain needs to sleep it's just it's part of our just part of our body part of the system so make sure get rest it's important don't push yourself too hard because if you do you're going to get injured and if you get injured you're out for longer and if you're out for longer your mental health could decline did the injuries suck injuries are tough i'm going to spare the story but in
college i tore both of my labrums and my shoulders at the same time and they took me out of the gym for a month and during that whole month i couldn't raise my arms higher than this so when i walked i had to walk like penguin like you know like i was just in that mindset of like i want results faster and caused injuries and now you're out more your mental health is now worse you know like it's just too much there's a such thing as too much don't become a penguin yeah don't become
so another question that we asked alex was as a trainer do you deal with any body dysmorphia is this something you see at the gym regularly yeah so body dysmorphia i think we all we all deal with that from like a to a certain degree right because with my personal experience i mean i've naturally always been very lean i've always been very skinny right so i always been fixated on the scale right i need to be 170 175 and when i when i'm not around those numbers and i just start really focusing
on the scale i start really contemplating with the way i look right even though i probably have built some muscle right and that's why it's very important to keep track of progress pictures and stuff like that and other biofeedback because if you're solely focused on the scale or even all that you know it can really take a toll which like like it did with me you know a lot of people when they look themselves in mirror they probably think they're skinny even though they're probably not
right and it's you know it's obviously not normal for us to be that way um but i think that everyone like i said goes through that to a certain degree and like i said with my personal experience it has been with the weight scale it's been for the longest time i can't sometimes i can't even step on the scale without like you know ruining my whole day you know it's kind of it's got a lot better but i know i think like two years ago it's something that i couldn't even
weigh myself because i knew if i weighed myself it would just take a mental toll on me and it would just like ruin my whole day it would set the tone for the whole day and you know it's something that i've learned to cope with you know what i mean something you know put i put this the weight skill aside and i just started taking pictures more videos and kind of focusing on what really matters because in a day it's just a number body dysmorphia i think really results from comparing yourself
i feel like that's where it really begins once you start comparing yourself to other people to even yourself when you look yourself in the mirror and you don't see what you like to see whether it's because you saw some big muscular man on instagram and now you're frustrated with yourself because you're not seeing the same results or whether it's you see somebody in the gym doing a crazy amount of weight and you don't understand why you can't do the same you start going down this path of just
continuously comparing yourself but it's not fair to you it really really isn't fair to yourself because you're putting yourself against these mountains i would say in the mountains of men mountains of men sure i mean hey i know plenty of women who compare themselves why don't i have as big of a butt as that girl does on instagram why don't i have uh a flat flat stomach like that girl does on instagram and the way she looks in the bikini it all starts with you you start
comparing yourself to anything else you'll lose you start comparing yourself to yourself you'll lose don't allow yourself to do that and i'm going to tell you right here right now if you are going through the struggles of body dysmorphia you're not alone you can get past it first first first first stop comparing yourself i want to be a little controversial go ahead please do please do i have a love-hate relationship with comparisons in that aspect i think comparing is good
but people just think of it the wrong way and not just that we've talked about in comparing yourself to others because you should you shouldn't do that and if you do i still think it is okay in some aspects to compare yourself to others but don't let it get to your head what i more think in when i think of comparing is good is you shouldn't be comparing your today to somebody else's today um when comparing the the most beneficial thing to me has been comparing my today to
comparing my yesterday or my last week how have i improved how have i gotten slightly better than the day before the week before how have i progressed towards my goals in that aspect with body dysmorphia comparing myself in the gym to myself the day before hey i'm not lifting you know 400 pounds on the bench press but i'm lifting five more pounds than i was last week or last month that is and has been very beneficial to me and i think in that aspect people people don't
normally think that way they think when you say stop comparing it's comparing yourself to others but i think people forget that comparing yourself to to yourself to your past self is good um when you're when you're making progressions towards your goals so it seems like you're saying that it's all about the mindset and how you look at it yeah and the brain is very unique in that way and we talked about this a little bit in nature things seem to be repeatable right like when we look at
the stars we look at galaxies it's in pictures it's very comparable to cells under a microscope in the human body things repeat in nature and in that aspect i think about like business all the time with compounding interest your brain works in that same way and it works in your favor or not in your favor in a very unfair way or a very advantageous way in terms of thinking which however you're thinking if you're thinking negatively your brain is going to non-linear non-linearly
adjust to those thoughts uh over just like compound interest would as you keep keep thinking more and more negatively it's going to go straight up and it's going to get 10 fold 100 fold you know those thoughts are going to be hurting you so bad more and more and more over time but on the other side it's very advantageous to when you're thinking of yourself and comparing yourself to how you were how you were getting closer to your goal in comparison of getting to your goal or
getting to that next step that is going to help you get to that goal in the future it's going to work in your favor in that same linear fashion the more work you do towards your goal the more you see yourself improving the more you think you're improving the more you are going to be improving and then the sooner you get to that goal and then make a new one even higher yeah yeah i mean i agree with you uh i just feel like i just feel like you can't deny the fact that
there are these kind of roadblocks and i feel like especially towards um especially towards like women too like you see like photoshopped images of women all the time and of course they see it too and like it gives them fake yeah i mean even dudes too but i feel like especially more towards women like you yeah you can't just say like oh you need to look at this and then and then tell yourself like oh it's good for me to reflect well on this because a lot of the times especially with with
women it's just like when you compare yourself to something unrealistic then you're going to set yourself unrealistic goals versus like i think you're thinking of more of like when we see something that is realistically that that we can realistically accomplish and that then that would fall into line with what you were saying yeah again like what cena said i think because yes it depends on the mindset yeah and so i think there's like two separate categories when it comes to that i think
also another hard part is you you never really know what um photos are photoshopped and what are not until you see it like badly photoshopped do you see a detail but some photos i'm going to be honest with you you truly can't tell if it's photoshopped or not there's a huge movement right now i don't know if you guys see it on social media i see it all the time now but it's more so with women uh they'll do like the classic like instagram posts for like whatever to
look really really good uh in however way and then the second photo they post is like them sitting naturally yeah like like you can see you know the wrinkles or the curls or you know whatever and not nothing bad about that but it's good to show people like hey like this person this is these are these two same people this person you might say like 10 out of 10 and now because she's sitting normally she's six out of ten these are the same people right and that really shows people like hey people
they don't even need photoshop just the way they pose the way the lighting is the way when they take the picture after the gym when you have a full pump like everything looks normal but and that's realistic uh but it's also at the same time very very very specific circumstances yeah and we just want to tell all the women out there you're beautiful you're loved i love you and you're not alone on to the next question well said sweet so the next question we asked him is
body dysmorphia feels like it's becoming more and more important to understand and learn how to cope with it so what would you recommend as far as tactics how to cope with body dysmorphia yeah so like i said the biggest thing is obviously taking pictures and video right and obviously when it becomes a habit right let's say if you're weighing yourself every single day so we gotta slowly break that habit right so for a client who comes to me and says you know i need to weigh myself every
single day right or i can't whatever the case may be so either we we take so if they're weighing themselves every single day right because they're just obsessed with the weight scale so what we do is we kind of we kind of break it down to like four or five days right or three days um instead of just eliminating it completely we kind of we can't take it slowly right so like i said it's baby steps i mean you're not going it's if it's a habit if it's something you've
been doing constantly then it's going to be kind of hard to break so something that i do with my clients is that we kind of we kind of take a step back from that you know it's not such a okay we're eliminating the weight scale right but we take actionable steps and that's something that i keep going back to but it's like i said those baby steps are going to lead to big changes right um and i've seen a lot of improvement right and especially with their mental health
i know how much it can take a toll on someone's you know mindset right and how they look so i think just by taking those small steps you know i said taking pictures taking videos or you know what i mean even some reassurance like i said having a coach can be very beneficial someone else looking at your body besides you because obviously you look yourself every day in the mirror and it can be very difficult to be like all right i'm making progress right or you
know instead you look in the mirror like oh my god i'm not big enough i don't have bigger arms you know what i mean so it's good to kind of get someone else's perspective you know maybe a loved one someone who maybe a workout partner and kind of you know ask them you know their input on how you look on a weekly basis right hey how am i doing what i mean kind of like that reassurance but then also have like videos to back it up right because it'd be so i mean it's
happened all the time with my clients where they take a picture and i said all right for this week don't don't weigh yourself but let's compare the pictures and the differences and most of the time it's it's it's amazing you know what i mean the changes that you can see within one week because weight fluctuates at all times right and there's a lot of factors that play into that um but yeah so i think that's that's kind of a piece of advice i can give you instead of just trying to cut it back
out completely and just throwing the weight scale away is just just to slowly practice you know what i mean making your way to that point you know so he has a good point where he says you look at yourself in the mirror every single day you're not going to see the changes in your body because you see what you see the same thing every single day and so what again what alex said is sometimes you need to get another perspective you need somebody else to see what's going on and
again that starts with just simply asking the question of hey what do you think of this workout or how do you feel about this or what can i do differently to help my body do this all starts with the first question just start off just just maybe even make a list of questions that you would love to ask a coach maybe there's been things that in your head that you've been thinking about that you just haven't been able to ask and now it's your chance so the next question we asked alex is
how do i swallow my pride and look to get a personal trader and say i need your help to push me to the next level and that's a really good question man i think i just got off the phone with a client that i just enrolled um and this this person's been lifting for five years right and the the thing that i told him he or he even communicate with me was like i needed to drop my ego right and i said well there's a reason to why you're on this phone call with me because he was
very hesitant to signing up and then we just kind of dig deeper and kind of see you know what what is the reason to why you know maybe he needs a coach right because you wouldn't be on a phone call with me um and i think we all get to a point on a journey where you know coaches need coaches too right and sometimes you just gotta swallow your pride and be like you know what i need help right and for me it's i mean i've worked with plenty of coaches as well so someone who always
preaches to higher coach and better yourself and invest yourself i've done it many times many times um and i think it's i think everyone needs that you know i mean i think everyone needs a coach or at least someone who you can connect with right and you feel like you could learn a lot from right because like i said you probably know things that i don't know i can pick your brain you can pick mine and that's the beauty of it we're not perfect but we both we're both two different human
beings but we know two different things right um let's so let's say we're both experts in our fields but maybe i know a little bit more on the nutrition side or strength training whatever the case may be or vice versa so it's always good to go in with an open mind right and once you realize once you put your pride aside once you put your ego aside you'll realize how much further you know coaches and mentors can take you i mean they can really level up your your life
you know what i mean in the sense it could be business um you know working out but i think just doing your research right doing your research and what is it that you like about that person right because you may really connect with that person and then you know what i mean and based on what they're learning you can also learn a lot from them right so it's not like it's it's a win-win situation here because you're getting the results that you want right you're putting your ego
aside but then after you're done working with that coach everything that you learn you can take away and then you know apply it to every other aspect in your life whether that be helping another person passing that information along or even within yourself or sharing that information to the internet you know what i mean so i think i think everyone should at least hire a coach or at least look into one if they're looking to you know better themselves or kind of take it to the
next level right but obviously doing your research i've been working out for eight years and i recently just got a coach and i've seen drastic changes in not only my body but my workouts i gotta say i don't care how long you've been working out 10 20 30 whatever amount of years that you've been working on you're a crazy bodybuilder i truly don't care but we all need help and sometimes you never know what you're doing wrong you don't even know if you need help or
you don't even know what you need help sorry no no you're completely right you never know what you need help with mine was diet i needed to fix my diet i was not looking good i know that for a fact and so what i did was i had to ask a coach i had to figure out a way to help myself and my coach completely changed my diet around and i feel ten times more confident in my body than i ever have so i gotta tell you man honestly i know you've been working out for years i know you think you know it all
i know you probably think that no one's going to teach you anything but don't look at it like that look at it as a new learning experience yeah maybe they learn something from you too for me it's like the uh the gym aspect is what i struggled with nutrition is what i studied in school and eating better because i was very i never worked out you know very overweight kid nutrition was the first thing i learned but in terms of like you know exercising like i didn't know how to do it like i
came to my friends i came to personal trainers and even after personal trainers i bought courses like there's things you can do on how to improve you know like you can lift weights but after a certain amount of time like if you're not doing that correctly or correctly progressively overloading you're gonna get stuck you're gonna plateau yeah no one wants a plateau you know what's crazy you know who's the first person i learned how to do proper technique with you you're my boy yeah i was actually
curious though with basketball were you always into basketball in that aspect or did your cousin get you into it no i was always into it but i learned um like progressing even more i learned it from my cousin yeah because i just know like they all they're like hardcore ballers yeah okay and then on to the next question we also asked alex how would you do how would you define mental toughness when you're having a bad day at the gym and you're looking to bounce back what do you do
so yeah so i guess it's like any other day you know what i mean it's just you know getting it done right so whatever your goals are and then having like you set discipline to to accomplish those goals you know because we all have bad days um there's moments where i don't even want to get out of bed right you don't even want to crawl out of bed and go to the gym but i guess it's where you know that's where discipline comes in right and because motivation comes and
go right it happens to all of us right one day you're feeling super motivated and then other days you're not um so i guess it's like i said it's just relying on your discipline and kind of taking those steps forward to you know getting into the gym and doing what you need to do right so i always have this uh ten minute rule with my clients where um if they're not having the best day right they're not feeling like working out i said well for try it out for 10 minutes right go to the gym
give it your best for 10 minutes and if it's not working out and it's truly not working out you're really not feeling good then okay go home go home and we'll try again tomorrow right but most of the time they're in there they get it done they're like you know what i'm so happy that i did this for 10 minutes i got to the gym and i made it happen and this can apply to anything as well right so let's say there's a certain task that you really don't want to do
you know right so and you just you just know it needs to get done but like you just don't feel like doing it you know do it starting for 10 minutes just 10 minutes and then once you get into the groove of things you'll realize that like okay look how much i've actually accomplished within those 10 minutes you know when i can actually do this you know but if you're feeling like burnt out you feel like you just can't do it then i would step away and then try again tomorrow right there's nothing
wrong with that it all starts with good habits it all starts at just two two minutes atomic habits by james clare he says in the book the only way to really push yourself in a bad day is just get into the gym for two minutes because once you're in there you're gonna work out and even if you work out for five minutes like alex said ten minutes whatever and you're personally not feeling sure leave that's your decision that's okay there's nothing wrong with that but what you can say is that
you worked out even if it was ten minutes five minutes whatever you stepped into the gym and not only am i proud of you for getting in there but hey if you had a bad workout happens i have plenty of bad workouts even on my great days i've had bad workouts but on my bad days well i've had a bad i've had a great workout so bad days with good workouts it happens somehow it happens always it makes the rest of your day better oh yeah oh yeah so hey just step into the gym create good
habits that's all that matters yeah i like that i like what he said about the motivation too it's a motivation will not last forever you know after maybe a month you get bored of it but you keep going that's pushing past your motivation i like to think about it like water cuts through rock because of consistency not because of power like you you will keep going what kind of mental strategies do you personally employ or tell your clients when dealing with the negative and positives in the gym
yeah so something that i've been doing recently for the past like i said six months beginning of the year i've been doing a lot of journaling a lot of meditating um it's actually helped tremendously at first it's very maybe kind of confusing right because it's it's like okay i've never done this before and how to do it like what am i supposed to do right so like i said a little bit a little bit of sensitive research i reached out to people who do this on a daily basis um and i said you
know what i'm gonna give it a try right i'm gonna give it a try for a week and if i don't like it fine um but i what i what i do is i meditate for five five to ten minutes a day uh five minutes in the morning and then i take maybe like a ten minute meditation halfway through the day um and it really helps with my anxiety it really helps out too so sometimes when i have a lot going on it can be a lot to cope with right i just end up getting really bad anxiety you
know i get blurred focused i can't focus in at all so what i do is i take some time out of my day to really just sit down and meditate uh and then after that i also like to journal as well and then journal could be anything from like positive affirmations you know what i mean or just anything that's honestly going through your mind so it doesn't have to be perfect there's no set in stone rule on how to do this but i think kind of drilling journaling your thoughts and how you're feeling at
that very moment can make can be very impactful right or even like looking yourself in the mirror and be like you know what i'm badass right or like it's gonna be okay like it's going crazy right now but i'm gonna i'm gonna get i'm gonna get my [ __ ] together um and i think everyone should at least experiment with it you know what i mean it's not always for everyone but kind of find what works best for you whether that be you know going on a walk you know what i
mean going on a bike ride hanging out with loved ones uh but as far as like when you're on your by yourself i mean even reading i mean it can be very therapeutic for some people but like i said the two things that have helped me tremendously is definitely meditating and journaling it kind of keeps my thoughts together and kind of keeps me composed and it's been helping me out for a while quick thing for our listeners we did an episode on meditation it was the first episode of season three go
back and check it out it'll teach you a lot about how to meditate what meditating does for your mental health and mr will black here it's pretty rad explains his experience with meditation but continuing off of what alex said journaling i've heard from plenty of people helps them a lot journaling personally for me doesn't work um but for other people i've heard so many things that journaling really really helps them so if it's something that you haven't tried yet give it a shot i mean
i gave it a shot it's just i just i'm not very good with words and then i'm always like looking at the word misspelling something and being like well i just misspelled um but as he's continuing explaining the positives and negatives of the strategies that you can do to really help your mental health remember that there's a lot of things that you can personally do you just got to figure out what works for you so meditation work and journaling work for alex i enjoy working out and i really really
enjoy reading so those are two things that really help me anybody else have any strategies whatever it is it just matters that you start it just like you said facts not gonna know if you don't try on to the next question we asked alex what would you go back and tell yourself as a person just starting to work out at the gym yeah i would definitely tell myself like it's okay to fail right and be patient right and it's all a process right it's all trial and error i think that we as
human beings we try to be perfect right we try to do everything right and in that case it's you know it's not gonna happen right and looking back i mean i've been training for over eight nine years now and looking back at that um i mean i made a lot of mistakes you know what i mean i made a lot of mistakes but it's made me shape me for the person i am today and now you know having the opportunity to share my knowledge and everything that i've learned and kind of
implemented my clients it's something that like i said it's very fulfilling um but like i said it's it's trial and error right and i know a lot of people may be intimidating intimidated to go to the gym especially like you said body dysmorphia right that's something that like well why do i want to work out then if i'm going to be end up having a body this morning well i think like i said it's all your perception on it and and your perspective and sometimes like i
said it it sucks right it happens you you don't even realize that it that you might have it right because you know one thing you know you're training and it's all fun and games but then once you start looking more at a competitive level right and you're taking things a little more serious that's where um you start comparing yourself having by this morphe i mean social media really doesn't help that either right depending if you're if you have a certain fitness influencer that
you're looking up to it can be very difficult to try to um probably reach those goals just because they're probably pro athletes right they're they're enhanced right and you don't know that i mean starting off that's i looked up to certain bodybuilders and you know obviously they were they were not natural and it's something that i kept you know talking down to myself thinking i can never achieve that i can never achieve that but then once i realized like i'm
on my own journey i got to focus on that um i think that it's helped a lot so like i said have a have a big reason why you know what's your why to why you're doing things um and kind of remind yourself that on daily basis you know what i mean and really take those small actual steps to get you there what i would have told myself was stay consistent focus on diet and don't let the outer world hurt your inner world at the gym it's not gonna help social media looking at a bunch of guys
who are extremely muscular not gonna help just gonna make you feel worse about yourself because you're just like why don't i have that but maybe again like we discussed mindset shift is what you need maybe you need to look at it in a different light maybe you do want to look at those pictures and tell yourself i can do this but again be realistic with yourself be honest with yourself don't allow other people to present an image to you that is unrealistic because there's a
lot of images out there that are unrealistic goals are really good to have and you know we talked about this a little bit before but your goals are constantly going to change you know you might achieve your goal or you might get past your goal and set up an entirely new one but the most important thing is when setting goals is not to set unrealistic goals you know talking about how people look and comparing yourself to others you know people just like alex said they
might not be enhanced or they might have implants of any kind of source something like that but when you set an unrealistic goal and you set that as your goal and you don't achieve that you hurt yourself mentally more than you're going to help yourself you know start off you know if you're starting your first goal ever in some category specifically in the gym start small you know when you achieve your goals as small as or big as they are it all feels the same it feels great
but if you don't set achievable goals when you don't hit that it feels even worse compounding just like you said small details will later end up changing so much about you it's all about the small details next question we ask alex is what would you recommend to someone who's negatively affected by society's portrayal of the perfect body so one thing that i that i've done you know what i mean we're talking about social media real quick so uh something that i've done that you know when when i used
to pick up my phone right and looked up in the morning and i saw other people's bodies right their their progress pictures it would give me like bad anxiety right or whatever they were doing i was just like well i'm not doing enough or like if i'm taking a rest day so one thing that's really helped me is there's actually like a mute future on on instagram where you can mute people's stories so that way you're not being able to see their post uh i would honestly eliminate anything that
triggers you right so anything that's probably going to get in the way of achieving your goals eliminate it because you don't need that those are distractions right and accepting you know you for who you are i mean it's a lot easier said than done but once you start to realize like okay like you know what i mean i have my full limbs like i'm grateful i'm thankful for what i have i'm gonna do my absolute best what i mean to work on this and see how far i can take it right and like i said that's
where hiring a coach investing in yourself if you're really looking to level up higher yourself hire a coach what i mean do extensive research do whatever as it takes to you know reach that goal right and do whatever it takes honestly um but like i said i think we all come to a point where we got to accept you know genetics and everything they play a huge role and we do what we got to do with it right we got to work we had try our absolute best to overcome those
obstacles um and like i said what if there's things that trigger you on social media things that aren't are doing more good than harm you know doing more harm than good uh i would definitely like eliminate those things as far as like you know mute unfollow whatever is that you need to do but like i said focus on yourself and you know strive to be your best you know always always try to be your best always do your best again motivation is extremely important finding a coach is extremely important
meeting someone there's nothing wrong with it if if it truly triggers you that's something that you need to figure out what triggers you is it the photos is it the videos is it what the person is doing what is it i think you need to understand what you're feeling in that moment when you get triggered so that begins the process of understanding not only yourself how to better your mental health because if you mute somebody who's triggering you or maybe honestly unfollow
we've gotten so stuck into a world where if someone unfollows you someone mutes you someone makes you it's it's like an end of the world thing it's really weird i'm not sure if anybody else feels like that i'm sure everybody especially in this world has gone through it yeah seriously everybody i used to but not anymore i mean i've been there too don't get me wrong if i saw a friend don't follow me and be like what the hell man like what's going on yeah like what kind of beef do we got
why do you hate me like what's going on if it's a very close friend i think that plays in a woman different right yeah that's a different story yeah if you truly like don't know the person and you don't like have any communication or have ever had conversation with something again you're creating this world for yourself that's just making your life harder and giving you bad mental health like making your mental health worse it's like you're doing it to yourself to hurt yourself
and you don't want to do it because society or social media told you that it's going to make you feel some type of way i don't know what else to tell you man if you don't if it triggers you unfollow or mute just do whatever is going to help your better mental health you owe no one you you don't owe anyone anything you truly on social media you don't owe anybody anything you want to unfollow somebody and follow them you want to muse somebody mute them don't make yourself feel bad because of
the situation that you put yourself in don't because that's what's gonna even hurt you even more do what's best for yourself yeah i think that was really well said and uh so in relation to that we asked him as well how did you discover that images on social media could trigger you was it you understanding who you were or just kind of this feeling that you felt when you saw it i guess it was kind of like a little bit of both things right combinations with two of those
things like i i want to see i was dealing with certain insecurities and stuff like that and when i saw someone performing better maybe they were doing more weight you know it kind of like triggered me right and this was back in the past especially when i first started this was something that i dealt with where i would always compare myself and i would always try to do more one-up someone else and i always like had this constant battle where i was like trying to compete with someone else when in
reality you should be competing with yourself right trying to better yourself so when you're when you saw if you're fitness during right you start off because it's fun you want to look good but then it it it has like a weird twist to it where you're like you find yourself competing with someone else right you find yourself trying to lift more weight trying to do that um but it doesn't work that way right and i learned that quickly that you know you're in there to better yourself right
and obviously your mental health especially if you're dealing with certain things i think that that should be your main focus right and kind of eliminate those other things because it's easy to get caught up on on like you said outside factors especially social media i really like how he puts that uh everything based on your personal journey you know the way society phrases things nowadays is you need to look a certain way you need to lift a certain amount of weight if you
want to get a girlfriend boyfriend you need to do this you need to have this body you need to make this much money you need to have this job and again outside the gym with everything it goes the same way you're on your own personal journey and you don't owe anybody anything that was very well said the way he put that and people will truly think that like your life is part of their journey or you and somebody else are supposed to feel as if there's something going on or
what i'm trying to say is this you are on your own journey in life you are on no one else's journey i'm not on trying journey i'm not on will's journey i'm not on brandon journey i'm on my own journey to figure out who i am who i want to be and where i want to get so what i'm trying to say again is that live your life don't compare yourself social media is just a tool there's no such thing as a perfect body you can you can argue with me till the day i die there's no such thing as the perfect
body because in my eyes if i see something that's perfect that and brandon sees something you might not think it's perfect again don't compare walk in your own shoes of your life man yeah in terms of you know on the topic of being triggered it doesn't do good for your mental health and like we said you know unfollow those people and figure out what triggers you you know i think just like alex said at the beginning like there lots more things will trigger you
especially in the gym like i'm used to it i'm sure cena you're used to it you know in the outside the gym with anything it affects everything but i think mentally a very healthy thing to do is at some point not just throw it under the bus but understand why you feel that way because then you can turn those things into a positive experience and you can truly understand within your own head why you feel this way and you know maybe you give yourself something
to get better at something to get better on maybe you know you're afraid of asking questions and now because you've understood you know what's going on in your head you're you're more out there to ask more people questions and you learn more and you know we talked about this time trade-off thing you know they're just like with personal trainers those people are there to help you when they've been doing this for five ten however many years you know just because
maybe you're bigger than them or you run faster than them they still might know more and you could you could maybe even teach them the same thing don't be afraid of challenges but make sure that you're doing it in a healthy way so we'll get into the next question uh the next question we asked alex is how do you find your balance in life and in the gym how did it improve your mental health yeah so i competed back when i think 2016-17 i was only 19 years old
and i think it's it shaped me the person who i am today made me who i am because there was a lot of dark moments during prep um you know obviously you need to find that balance like you were saying because once you become obsessed with obsessed with the sport especially if you're competing you're doing competitively that's a whole different ball game but once you start obsessing like oh i can't go out with my friends or family because i need to eat my meals right or i just need to isolate
myself i need to focus on just strictly weightlifting or whatever the case may be um and what really helped me was you know you know taking telling myself that it's okay to take a break and then enjoy you know the time with the loved ones right enjoy yourself a few drinks enjoy yourself some food that burger whatever the case may be um because in the end of the day you're able to bounce back from that you're not going to gain 10 pounds of fat from that one day or even the
weekend and it's something that i always tell my clients as well is that one day one bad day is not going to ruin your progress and it's okay to find that balance because we're not meant to work out seven days a week eat chicken and rice every single day it's okay to have fun go to festivals go to the bar and drink hang out travel it's okay to do those things obviously in moderation but have that balance right allow yourself one or two days out of the week where
you just unplug and that's something that i do it you know the two days is saturday and sunday so monday through friday i work right um but saturday and sunday i don't take calls i don't take calls i i take some time to enjoy with loved ones right my family and i just i just disconnect right i try not to post on social media as much or scroll through the feed and i just try to be present in the moment and i think a lot of people will benefit a lot from that because
we're always attached to our phones we're always checking to see who liked what what is the latest person doing what i mean so i think having some time to like recharge put your phone down and just cannot connect with yourself in a deeper level right like i said going going on a walk journaling meditating but like i said i think it's very important to know when to unplug and allow yourself maybe one or two days during the week to do that he explained that when it comes to
bodybuilding and prep and uh going down this dark phase um i don't i don't have enough information to come and tell you what prep is like because i've never done it i've never bodybuilded before however i have plenty of friends who are bodybuilders and i've talked to them about it and what their mental strengths are when they're going through it he one of my friends had told me about his bodybuilding experience and how he went through prep and he said that you need to truly be
mentally tough to go through bodybuilding and he said if you don't have that mental toughness bodybuilding will be very hard for you it will be extremely difficult because it takes a toll on your body it truly does however if you set those kind of challenges for yourself and you want to reach that level of maybe reaching first place second place third whatever it is and this is just presenting to bodybuilders allow yourself to do whatever it takes to get there but don't allow yourself
to go through a dark phase dark path if you see yourself going down that maybe bodybuilding isn't for you and i'm not here to tell say alex bodybuilding is not for alex or whatever i mean we all have different challenges in our life things happen life is completely different for everybody but if you personally set a high challenge for yourself and you want to reach that goal you'll do whatever it takes to reach that goal and if that is going through hard prep you got to do what you got to do to
reach whatever goal you want to do so if that takes going through a dark path if you're mentally tough and you're able to go through it you can do it i totally believe in you but again there's a very thin line between hurting your mental health and challenging your body to a different level it's up to you on if you want to cross it hey man i've heard bodybuilding is not for me because i'm personally i'll say it on here i'm not mentally tough to do bodybuilding i just i don't
think i'm capable of the um prep i don't think i'm capable of the intensive calorie deficits or what whatever it is and watching my food like that i just i'm i'm not able to do it i agree i feel like i would be happy with the result but getting there i would not enjoy that experience no and that and for everybody it's completely different man i i've talked to plenty of bodybuilders who love the whole experience all the way through those people are wild yeah like
seriously mentally tough like that's something else and and if you're not mentally tough man there's there's nothing wrong with not being mentally tough again it's completely normal that was just my disagreement but hey try it okay but again you're not gonna know if you don't try it that sucks you know if you got a goal try it you don't like it don't do it again yeah yeah i think it just everything's just based on one's personal experience with something but uh obviously you
nobody knows yourself better than yourself so you just need to know when it's at this sort of toxic level and how to step away from that yeah very thin line very thin line i don't even have the words for that thin line no like how do you describe that i i i can't you know what i'm saying i think the way i would describe is mental toughness i think that's the th that's that's the line we just can't understand it because we don't have it happens on to the next question and our last
question for alex for newcomers at the gym what would you tell them to better their mental health yeah i would say like i said take it day by day i think allowing myself to be patient allowing myself to you know see the results that i want to see but it's going to take time it's going to take effort and know that it's okay you know we're not perfect we're going to make mistakes like i mentioned before so you know kind of giving yourself that you know what i
mean reassurance so that way you're able to kind of reach your goals right because it can be very difficult so i mean that's something that i could definitely advise those who are looking to start is just like i said obviously take that first step but then know that there will be obstacles and you're not perfect you're not meant to be perfect um but it's always going to be better it's always going to get better always become one percent better every single day something that i always
tell myself and something that i tell my clients dude favorite phrase for the one of my favorite phrases apologies day by day in life we always look so far into the future that we get lost man we get lost because we're so focused on the future that we lose what the present feels like and if you're somebody who's new and you have no idea what working out is like and how to get started day by day one workout at a time one gain at a time one push-up at a time one lift at a time
just take it all day by day don't allow yourself to think about the future oh man i just i what if i want to lift this or what if i wanted to do that or how to get this and how this stop stop you're just overthinking day by day oh he's all right when he said uh he said something and it sparked a thought in my head and i wish i remember the exact word that you said but i think about it like oh being in the present thinking too far into the future right i heard something a while ago and it
just blew my mind but think about like if we just lived in the present and we're happy every day in the present you know living in the present you're happy with what's going on whether it's the same thing you did yesterday you were happy because it's a new experience think about when you go on vacation you're you're having the time of your life right you're just living day by day maybe you're in florida you're supposed to go scuba diving and yeah you know so
it gets canceled but then you go out on a boat and you just live it you just enjoy it what if you lived every day here like you were on vacation like just living in the present and enjoy like you know you've seen sand before you've seen a tree before but when you're on vacation it's [ __ ] wild dude what if we lived every single like i i i don't know if i have that ability and obvi right now i don't think i do but like what if we lived every single day in the present like we
were on vacation appreciating everything like that is so mind-boggling to me isn't that's awesome will's quote of season three yeah every day like you're on vacation i have 210 agreements live live in the present moment man yeah and if we can all do that then we would see a drastic uh uptick in our people's happiness and it all starts with you yeah so amen i love you i think we all i think we all love you so yeah i think we only have one last reminder for you guys please please please remember
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