Danielle LaPorte on Heart Centered Consciousness

instantly makes me cry in the best of ways. But I'm always inspired by her vulnerability and her wisdom, and I'm so honored that she came on this podcast to share a bit of that wisdom with us. She is one of Oprah Winfrey's super Soul One Leaders. She's also a best selling author of some really incredible books I highly recommend, and an incredibly gift and motivator and just all around wise woman. She's also a dear friend of

mine and our guests on today's Holy Humane. Thanks Okay, Danielle Looport, thank you so much for coming on the Holy Human Podcast. I'm gonna start here. I literally am about to cry because, first off, I so appreciate who you are and what you bring to the world. But every time I hear your voice, this is what happens to me. I you move me. There's something about your voice that hits my heart in such a way. I don't know if it's the motherly quality, but it just

heals me. So thank you. I feel the same way about you. I've been listening to you. I've been listening to chant for since it came out, and when I tune into chant, I feel you're healing process. I just feel everything you went through to get to where you are.

And I mean specifically with throw your arms around the world, my arms around the world, you know, like when I danced to that, I feel just how how committed you are to love and to christ consciousness and um, you know, when when that came out, I texted you to say, like, it's not my place to be proud of you. It's not, it's not my job, but I just feel like it's such an arrival. And I was thinking this morning about you know, us having this conversation, and I so wish

we were like on a sofa together. Me too, Yeah, just curled up. I think the medicine is transparency, Like we know, you know, all anybody who has any capacity to help other people heal is like you know, all healers are wounded healers, and then to be really out with like for each person to be out with their individual journey just the story, just just everybody's the people who can say I'm there too, or I'm approaching that, or I'm not alone. Transparency is the way, and it's

showing up and how you show up. You thank you, and I followed your work for a while now and probably been one of our biggest influences in being able to share the totality of my journey because you know, the way that you show up in the world is so important. I mean, that's why I titled this podcast, you know, Holy Human. It's because God, I mean, I don't know how long you know, I spent being lean rhymes, you know, as just this one kind of slice of myself and a lot of me wasn't invited to the

table because the world didn't want that. They wanted this one piece of me. And so you know, I've always said that you know, my my affair and and everything that kind of blew up in my face was probably the biggest gift that ever happened to me because it allowed me space for my humanity and for all of me. And when I found you and your story and your work, that is what so resonated, and in fact, I I went, I've been listening to White Hot Truth. I've been listening

to you a lot um this past week. And I read the book when it first came out, but I reread it this week and I'm like, oh, yeah, everything you said was just it hit me different because I feel like I'm at a different space in my life

than when that book first came out. You know, I've been on the spiritual path of finding the things that work for me and then realizing that those things don't work anymore, and coming really after it's been about eight years of that journey for me, now coming home to my myself and trusting that wisdom that lives within and that that probably is it's the scariest part of the journey because You're like, wait, I thought I thought it was all the other things out there, you know, I

thought it was, and and those are all beauty, you know, the meditations and the prayers and chanting and all of it. You know, other healers working with other people like it's all all been important, but now coming home to my own wisdom is it's it's what I know has to happen at this point. And I know you speak about that uh so often. And something that you've been talking about which has really hit home with me as simplification and simplifying life, I mean in every way. And it's also,

by the way, something that's terrifying for me. And I would love to get your take on that in a second. But what brought you to this idea of you know, of I need to simplify and how has that reached out into to every part of your life? Well, I feel like last year, you know, spring of when everybody decided, so many of us decided like the right thing to do is like to shelter in place and just kind

of ride this wave. I just felt like I I looked at my mortality for the first time and and I decided like I was going to go all the way, Like what if am I willing to die for what I believe in? When is life going to take me? Um? Does my son really need me? Maybe? You know, if I were to die from some illness soon or what's happening you know, in terms of world health, is it my son's karma to have a mother, you know, to

be motherless? Like I just went for it, and I just brought up all of these urges, like, um, I really got the holy human struggle, like I just want to shave my head sometimes go to the Ganges. Leave it all and like what is that about? What's that about? And I did. I just decided like I was gonna let it all go. I sold my sports car, I got rid of shoes, I got rid of clothes. I decided, you know, one of my desires has always been, you know,

I want a beloved. I want that partnership. And I just said to God, Okay, if it's not for me, I'll leave it. I'm just going to play with this idea of thy will be done, which is terrifying. I want I want to talk. I want to talk about the terror. And then on the note of the beloved, I let that go. I let career aspirations go. I was like, you know what, maybe I should just sell my house and get a little apartment and just meditate. I could live off the mind. I could make this

work for many years. Just have a little herb garden, it would be great, right, And everything that I held in my heart as an aspiration as willing to give up and most of it came back mm hmmm. So I was like, oh, okay, now I'm going to have the courage to still want this. And then the man came and career is just shimmering and lovely, and I'm super satisfied. It turns out I didn't die last year. I'm still here, congratulations, thanks, But a lot of clinging

and a lot of striving left. So what I found underneath the striving is this is such a perfect time to have this conversation because I've just come out of like three intense months of agony and suffering, and I was thinking about you because some of that agony was a real kind of anxiety, which lots of many people don't understand until they have that experience. And then I had some health stuff that was just a lot of physical pain, and I got to the place of like

what else. I really felt like my soul and spirit was saying, like, just go deeper with the letting go, just let I was like, what the funk else do I need to let go of? And it was the fear it was the fear, and I thought, like, this is so cheesy, Wayne Dyre, This is really about letting go and letting God. And I just am so tired of the fear that has, in some way or another, really driven a lot of my life. I know it doesn't look like that from the outside to so many people.

Your life doesn't look like that. So most of our lives, we play it so well, doesn't look like that. But so much of craving is driven by fear. So much is driving fear, goals, fear, wanting, fear. And I'm as done with it as I can be done with it today, And the only way to do it is to just first of all, you have to see it before you can go of it. You have to see like what you're gripping, and see how the effect has had on you, let go of all the stories around it, and just

be like, I'm done. I'm done living this way. I want peace. You've got to really want peace more than anything. And I think it's the one higher use of devotion and desire to want for the right thing, to want for the right thing. I think a lot of us think we want that, but I don't know necessarily if we do, and I wonder if it's for me. I do know there's a piece of me that really wants peace. UM. But I do also see that there's pieces of me that are very much um, addicted to the struggle, um,

addicted to the loneliness. Uh. Let's come up with all the different words for this ego small self, wound, itself, the lie, the illusion, the part of ourselves that thinks we're separate, separate from our hearts, separate from our soul, separate from each other, separate from creation. None of that wants peace, none of it because peace would make all that dissolve. It wants to live. The ego wants to be alive, like the metaphor had been working with lately.

With the ego is like the egos like a wounded dog. I grew up in the country that lots of some dogs had to be put down. You know, you can't go near a dog that's been wounded. It'll just it wants to attack you, very slowly eventually maybe. And that's what the ego is like. It's saying, like I don't want love, I want separate. I want you to think you're small. I want you to struggle the ego. The ego thrives on strife, like struggle and separateness is like

sugar for the ego. And but really, really, really the ego wants to come home. It's like that that dogs. It really just wants to be healed. But it's just barking at us all the time. And you know, in my thirties, I used to think peace was like just ridiculous. Why would I want peace? It's not exciting, it's not sexy, it's not gonna piece, it's not gonna get me what I want. It's not very hot. And I'm over it,

really over it. Well, I think when I mean for me, like when I think about peace, I think of the monk is sitting in meditation, and it's like, that's that's where peace comes from. It's only going to be in those places because we can't exist in life, like you're saying, with an exciting life, with a fun life, with being in peace. And I you, I mean that is like that is the one of the greatest lies, you know, truly, um,

it truly is. And why do you think simplification and and the simplicity and the peace, why do you think we're so afraid. I mean you said the ego, yes, but what maybe hiding underneath there when we're afraid to simplify, Well, I think the stuff that's hiding underneath there, it's the reason we're afraid to simplify, Like all the stuff. You know.

Carl Young would say, like, it's all the shadow, it's all the subconscious stuff you're going to realize, like I would say, like on my journey, I realized, Um, there's like this neediness and this clinging nous, and there's greed and there's desire, and I have this inner conflict. You know, this is the beauty of you know you naming the last album Holy Human. What's the chant? What's the subtitle? Oh?

The Human and the Holy Holy Right, Yes, that's the that's been My strong is like should I give it all up? Um? You know I'm partner on part horror like all of that, like, um, and thank god somebody said it. Now. I feel so liberated in this moment I've also seen and how do I be both? And then you know, and then my psychologists like Danielle that's all church, and then all mystics will say, it's all God,

It's all God. One of the most helpful things lately has been this talk that are you familiar with Audio Shanti m m okay. So Audio Shanty says that you know, in terms of nondualism, we've got it wrong. So just like the quick breakdown is like love and hate, holy and human shadow and light side right, and we want to move to nondualism where it's like it's wholeness, it's all in, it's all love. So what what most people perceive is that nondualism is like it's just love, it's

all happiness. We just choose the positive. And his experience was so Audio Shaunty for those people who don't know, he's just just lovely guy. His real name, I think is Steve from California, who's like a Zen practitioner, really young, and he had these awakening experiences. He has these high experiences where he feels like he is the God source, he's nothing, and he's everything all at once. It's beyond words.

Cannot describe it, okay, and then he comes back to being here and you know, there are tables and there's furniture, and there's a marriage and there's relationships, and he's like, but what's this and His epiphany was that non dualism is that we're both not that word the emptiness and the fullness. No, you're the emptiness and the fullness. And you're human and you're in marriage and you're frustrated and

there's furniture and you've got to get groceries. And that has really helped me lately, Like when I go into my existential should I leave it all? Am I holy enough? Am I meditating enough? Am I clean enough? And I you know, all the spiritual enoughness? I I could drive myself crazy. I mean, even Achard totally speaks to this, like, don't try and figure it out, just be here. And

when I'm here, I'm both. I'm a mother and I'm someone's girlfriend, and I'm hungry and I want to garden and I want to do podcasts, and I'm needy and I am complete, I'm very powerful and i am very lost. I'm both yes. And I think that that's been one of the greatest lessons for me, And it's something that I constantly have to remind myself because it's so easy to forget that we are both. And it's one of the greatest lessons was knowing that I can old. It

started with emotions. For me, It's like I can hold multiple things at once, you know, I can be happy and sad all at the same time, like and to be able to hold the totality of those emotions. And then now you're talking about it bleeding out into you know, the whole of our you know, a totality of our lives. Yeah, that is that is a beautiful, beautiful lesson that I I feel like it's so easily forgotten. I wonder, how

do you remember that. I was just talking to my friend Darryl about this, and I was talking about loneliness because it's something I'd love to discuss with you, because it's really been something I've been diving deep into lately. And we were talking about, you know, like if all of the things that we had in our lives were taken care of, there was we felt connected to everything and everyone. I feel like there would still be this piece of us that feels like we're disconnected from home.

There's this deep piece of us that we forget that we are the holy piece. We forget that we are, that we are connected to something higher. You know, I wake up every morning thinking I want to remember that totality of myself every day and it gets lost, like instantly, I feel like we go about our lives and but then maybe that is the thing. Maybe it is exactly right where we are in all of the human nous and in that moment, like if we dive into that piece of it, we are just as connected as if

we were in meditation and in prayer. All suffering is a result of that illusion that we're disconnected. All suffering is, you know, the Buddhi's say all suffering has to do with what we identify with. I would say all sufferings to do with misidentifying with things. So we think we're small, we suffer. We tap into our true nature. We realize we're divine, we're chosen. There's not even God is not even having a discussion about whether we should be forgiven

or not. It's not even on the tape. Well, we just are loved. So you can have those moments. You can sing, you can have it in meditation, you can have it in the garden, you can have it just like with your barista. And then you're gonna walk out of the cafe and you're gonna shrink, and you're gonna go what I just felt so exalted and so high, and why now, Because that's how insidious it is, like super The meta view is we have to keep in mind we are trying to undo eons, lifetimes upon lifetimes

of conditioning of ego and darkness and shadow. We're good. We're good if we can have some connected moments in stillness and meditation. Um, we're doing good. If we can feel it in the k if we can feel a few times a day and you know, for me, I'm getting Really, they're like. What gets in the way is all the thinking. And the way to like stop the thinking is the ego uses the intellect and the body. This is really important to understand. This is like course

and miracle stuff. The egos language is identify with your body, because I can keep you small if you think you are too fat, too thin, to whatever, to whatever. And I can keep you separate if you know you bring race into the conversation or culture any that all keeps us divided. Um, how else does the ego keep us over? If I think I'm smarter than anybody else, or if someone else has got more knowledge, the haves and the have nots of knowledge. If you identify with you know

what I call your heart center, your soul. There's no division and everything is in So like my practice now, as I see something come up from my basement, the basement of my psyche, and I go, wow, that's clingy. And instead of I'm a loser because I'm clinging, it's like I just say, come on in. I got room. I'm big enough, I'm loving enough, I'm supportive enough, I'm enough of a mother that I got space for you. Clingy. I've got space for you, greedy, ego person, shattered, fragmented self.

And when you do that with yourself, you feel more connected to other people. The way to compassion. All right, on that note, we're going to take a very compassionate break and we'll be right back. Welcome back, labs. We are just talking about the power of compassion and for ourselves and others and leading with your heart. With Daniel Laporte, you talk about heart centered and that's what you bring. You point people back to often. What does that exactly

mean for you? Heart centered living? Ah, it's a reflective life. Do you want to wake up? Do you want to wake up? I think everybody's soul wants us to wake up and then some some of us get conscious like, Okay, I want to wake up. I want to live a meaningful, purposeful life. And of course we all want joy, we all want happiness. We may have addictions that keep us from those things. Some of us are so addicted to chaos and misery. You know. So you've got to do

the work. You've got to do the work. You're complete, you're safe, you're loved, you're loving. You've got to do the work to seal that awareness. And there's tools, and you know, you and I have been how many fucking workshops have we done? How much therapy? And so I think we try all these tools and they're great. Just like you said at the top of the hour, they were super useful. And then you've got to lay them

down and just be with yourself. And I think there's a test that it comes in at some point where you might have to leave your teacher, you might have to leave the church, You're gonna have to depart from something two claim yourself in a way. And yeah, just you know why I think it's so scary, just that it's yourself. I think from for my for myself. I mean, you're talking about like the fear of just like following your own heart is it's really it's the fear of punishment.

I mean, there's a fear of getting it wrong, like if I make this decision, if I turn left, if I do this yoga instead of that yoga, if I marry that person said that, I'm gonna, you know, screw up my life. But I think a lot of us it's really deep in the psyche that something greater than ourselves is going to punish us. And most religion is based on this that we're going to get cast out. And it may come into play like your friends are gonna leave you, or your agent is going to dump

you or whatever. But I think it's really almost like mythical, like we're gonna be cast out of the garden if we follow ourselves. It definitely goes that deep. I'm actually

this is so interesting. I'm finishing a new album right now, and uh, there's so much of this that came through on this record, and that that idea of original sin we'd talk Home record, Yeah we did, And it lives deep within the psyche, deep, especially as you know, especially as a woman, and the innocence, you know, the innocence that I think I'm returning home to I know I've returned home to it. You know. The Chant record was

a way of returning home to it. My writing, you know, this new record was a way of returning home to it. And yeah, there's a there's an innocence that we come home to and ourselves too. And it's for me that's been I mean for multiple reasons. Look, I started so young, like my innocence was truly like kind of blown and shattered to pieces at a very young age. But it's that's been truly like one of the saddest journeys back into myself and still is like I'll touch it and

then I'm not sure what to do with it. Um, But that's where, like, you know, that's where all the joy lives. And and I feel like the that whole punishment peace is uh is deeply connected to that for me, and and the fear of punishment is that is so deeply true. And to be honest, you know, there has been outward punishment. You know, I've experienced thatward punishment. I'm sure we all have and have been cast out. I mean,

the exile for me was real, um. But the exile also from of myself being cast out of my own self like that. That return is so important. I think that's the journey and I'm on right now, is is coming back to that. My most recent awesome revelation is that nothing outside of ourselves is punishing us, although that's how all of organized religion is set up. And this comes from Hermetic Egyptian philosophy. I've been reading this lately with Yoga Nanda. God neither punishes, nor protects, nor rewards

our soul does that. And so I had to ask myself, where am I punishing myself? Where can I reward myself? Where can I have mercy for myself? Why am I begging God for mercy? I'm loved, I need to beg myself. I need to show mercy to myself. And so no judgment for what I manifest, no judgment for sickness, no judgment for any kind of condition, just mercy, mercy, mercy,

and recently, you know, part of my therapeutic process. I've never spoken these words because I've been such a sturdy New Age crusader like I manifested this and I'm going to take care of it, you know. And I just said to myself, i don't deserve this. I was really suffering, as really in a lot of physical pain, and I'd never ever let myself say that. I never wanted to be like in victim mode, but it was coming from the most loving, finally part of myself. I just said,

like Danielle, you don't deserve this. And and then then one has to ask what about karma, because there's cause and effect. Could be something I did in this lifetime or another lifetime where I gotta burn something off. I gotta do some due diligence here to bring it into balance. Even then I should have mercy on myself. I think mercy and self compassion it can right the wrong. This is like true atonement. It's like you just see the mistake with love and it dissolves. Yeah, forgiveness or mercy

and grace the same thing, right. I think mercy. I think they're cousins. Mercy is easy to understand when you think about it in terms of having mercy for someone else. So you can think of someone who done something heinous and awful even to you, you know, and mercy would be I hope you don't have to pay full price for that wrongdoing. I hope you get off easy. I think mercy is I pray you get off easy, really,

because why why be punished? Why why perpetuate punishment? I pray we all know that line from all the old movies. I make God have mercy on your soul, right, And then I think grace is the letting go and letting God like she comes in and she takes care of stuff, and but you have to unclench. You have to unclench. And what you're talking about with yourself of like the acceptance and that the original concept of original sin, that relief it comes when we let go of judgment and

that loneliness. I know that loneliness. That loneliness is. I think it's part of being in a human body mm hmm. And I think it's what we're here to dissolve. So you think that's you think that's possible, like to really in this, in this body, to dissolve that loneliness. I don't know, m hm, I don't know. I think I believe that there are enlightened beings who feel God's source who stay in body. I'm not there. I'm so not there.

I agree. I mean, there's been so many moments where I have been I mean, I'm blessed to have an avenue every time I opened my mouth, you know, to be able to connect with that. Um, I've done it in meditation. I felt that I've have come out of breath work and been like, holy hell, I'm not on this plane. Hallelujah. I feel the greatest amount of joy I've ever felt in my life. Why do I have to come back down from this? Why can't we always live there? It is a beautiful feeling. It is so

and you're you know, once you feel that. For me, once I felt that and really understood it, that's where my search started, you know. It's like that's love, Like, oh wow, I get to experience that. Like even if I even if I've even if I've already experienced everything I'll ever experience of that in this lifetime, I'll still look for it, like I'll still That's I think the deepest desire ultimately is to feel in connection with that energy.

It's so beautiful. You've got the taste, I know, right, totally totally, and it's you talk a little, you know a lot about about giving things up upward? What is that? This is an interesting concept that I've I've kind of struggled with. There's a piece of me that's like, oh yeah, I know exactly what that is to give it up to God. Um. And then there's a piece of me that's like, well, just that's it, Like just give it up? Like what what do don't I have to do something?

What is it? What does that experience? What do you what do you? What do you mean by that? Exactly? Because I've lived my whole life it's you know, that's been I brought up Southern Baptist and it was all about, you know, just giving it up to God. You know what is that experience like for you? When you say that? What what comes up for you? Um? You know when you're holding a child who has a cold, they're sick, and you say to them, I wish I could take

this from you. We all know that experience, Like we would take that suffering on and we have the capacity take that suffering on. We're healthy enough, we would take that. We would take that illness for them and running through it. I think doubting that creation, the infinite life, the mother, the father doesn't want our pain and can't take it.

That's delusional. It's completely right, Like whatever force that made us in our microbiome, and birds and the sun and the solar system can't handle our micro amount of pain. I don't think God wants us to suffer. I mean I had an experience where, you know, I was really kind of just emotionally crumbling. This is about three years ago. It's really dark time. Wouldn't trade it for anything now

that you know, I'm on the other side. But and I was at a river in in Santa Fe and it was like, really, it's like this kind of baptismal moment. I took off my clothes, I get in this rushing river. This is like, this is a big deal for me because I don't like to be called and and I felt like nobody could touch my pain, not my friends, not the person I was in relationship with, not my psychologist. I just come out of this shaman healing as London does in Santa Fe, you know, and it was like

the ultimate and loneliness. Nobody could get the pain, nobody could touch the could scratch it. And and I just realized, like only God can get to that. And God is waiting for me to just say come and take this from me. I'm going to I'm gonna give it to you. Here, here you have Oh, you're the one. This is the rouch and just to give it it can be transformed. And this is this is the basic love winds christ consciousness is transmutational love changes everything. You just say, I

am worthy of mercy. I deserve a break. Take it from me. And but but I think it's a there's a two steps to this. But like take it from me and then use me that I will be done. I cast away my worries so that this is really this is like the sacred semicolon. I offer you my worries and my pain so that I can be a vehicle for you. M hm. And then that's why we're here. We're here to get healed, and I think, and to heal each other. There are some days where I can't

see my capacity to heal myself, but you can. There's some days when I can't hear my voice, but I can hear your voice, and we do heal each other. We have to show up for each other. And I think this is the call of the times. You know, I'm talking a lot now about Age of Aquarius and like this whole new era that we're in, it doesn't even matter what it's called. But everybody can see we're in a new cycle of something and we're only going to get through this if we love ourselves completely. I

know it's easy to say, but total inclusiveness. Love your anxiety softly, love your power softly, don't cling to your power, and then I can love you and we're just going to get softer. That's where we're headed. Yeah, I saw I clipped where you put your anxiety as the beloved, like everything is the beloved, and it was such a beautiful reminder because it's true. I mean, it's it's all showing up. I mean, it's it's all coming from there.

That's that's everything. Is that? What is your relationship right now with anxiety? We call it your anxiety. You're just anxiety in general. But like where you at mm hmm I it happens daily. It's a man on um. It depends on I think this whole last year has been very loud, you know. I for me, it's my brain got really loud and louder than it has been in a very long time. And I'm off the road where I've been since I was thirteen years old, and I got to sit at home and which was wonderful by

the way. I mean, there's been a lot of beautiful things that have come out of this for me, um, but one of them has not been my anxiety and has gotten much louder. I started coloring recently and it brought me back to this really innocent piece of myself and it's very calming to my nervous system, and I'm starting to find new ways to to be with it. And I know that one of the greatest things is is acceptance of knowing that this is how I'm feeling

right now. I'm going to meet it here. And when I don't fight it, it's like the resistance keeps a going. You know. When I meet it, I think it it starts to dissolve. And there's so many emotions also underneath that that I'm that I've I'm resisting normally. It's something that needs to be expressed. Can you describe the anxiety. What's it like in your body? Yeah? It feels like someone plugged me into a wall socket. It feels like so much, so much energy running through every limb and

especially like my my center channel. Um, that's where it really starts. I can feel it, I mean all through it kind of and sometimes can feel like someone's choking me, which for me, like anything that has to do with my throat or my voice is like though, it just exacerbates what's going on. Do you know what triggers it life?

I mean, um, different things, I think, worry, I think about the future, you know, like I feel like, at least at this point, it's been um, you know, I thought I had I it, I had set myself up since I was a child, I think for never having to worry about business and money and you know, all the things that I grew up with nothing to be able to have set that up for myself at such

a young age. That all got stripped for me, which of course I know is the greatest thing that's probably ever happened to me once I get on the other side of this. But I think it's been just constant rumination and worry about the future for me, reminding myself the reminders every day of I don't need to be in control. I think. Really that's what it boils down to, is like feeling the need to control everything around me so I feel safe, which is a trauma response, totally

need to control. And then how does how how do you and end Eddie in a like in a marriage, work with your anxiety. Will he come in the room, You'll say, I'm having I'm in it now. Yeah. We I'm very vocal, and I used to not be because I thought I could handle it all. You know, It's like I can I can control this. I can handle it. Um No, I will one expressed to him what's going on.

And the wonderful thing about my husband and that I have wonderfully married into and that I didn't have as a child, is that he's able most of the time to meet me and say it's okay, like and be with me and that And that's what's been so healing about my relationship with him is that it's so very different then what I had as a child. M hm. And that's so beautiful. I mean, like you said, that is a trauma response, and he's helping me heal that that piece of trauma you know, for myself wait to

wait to manifest love, I know. Yeah, I mean he's he's a beautiful man and with you know, and we both have we both have places where we can't meet each other, um. And we're learning together and that's I think that's all I can ask for is to learn and grow together and and he we both heal each other in different ways, and it's been it's been really powerful to have him in my life. I've been thinking about anxiety and the body and how much of a call it is really back to the letting go. It's

just all you have is now. All you have is now. I mean it goes back to this. Sounds like super dramatic, but I just think, could I die today, would I be ready to die today? Could I have could I let go of everything today? And the answer is rarely no. Sometimes say yes, like Okay, I feel close to love and I know that who knows, maybe I could be of more service from the other side, like I don't know. But then I also like the idea of like could I let go of everything? And why do I want

to be here? And I just kind of recommit to being here, like, oh I do want to be here? I do. I still I still have things to do and there's so many people that I love and there's

still there's so much joy. That's my next question for you, not in spite of or despite having anxiety sometimes but alongside that, I want you to tell me if this is true, Like you have this whole life and you have a relationship with joy and you have a relationship with happiness and euphoria and expression, and people need to hear you can have you can have it all. You can have anxiety and joy the new halfit at all totally. Oh my god, that's hysterical. Well, you know what's interesting

about that? Um? I think I think I'm just really allowing myself to touch joy, like true joy. I think I you know, I go back to that innocence within me that feels like it got so repressed and that it was all about work and it was all about the struggle and always forward moving. And in this last year I got to a place I did the somatic experience. Um, I've been working a lot with somatic work, and I had the somatic experience where I felt like I was outside of myself and kind of dropped in and I

started laughing and crying all the same time. And I was in the space for about forty eight hours. My my dear friend Darryl and I who create he creates everything with me. We wrote this song called Innocence from that space, and it's funny because the first lyrics are come back to me. We'll set eating eating free, and joy will again win the Holy warm. And I cry when I think about it because, oh, to me, like that is the truest piece of joy that I've touched mhm.

And I have. I'm finally allowing myself to have that mhm. And it's uh, it takes It's taken a long time to get there. That's touching your divinity, like when we when we see who we really are, you can't help but be joyful, like there's no other there's no other response to have when you just see low I am, I am love, I am love is flowing through my by I'm like this conduit. How can you not be joyful? And then how can you not be moved? And how can you not want to It's like I was blind

and now I see you know that's it. That's the amazing grace. I mean, you're doing this with your life now, your vocation. When you when you touch that, you just want to go. And I just want to go. I want to hold people. I want to put my hands on their shoulders and just say like it's possible. And I'm struggling too, and I don't get it every day all day, but I know what I've tasted it. It's possible.

We're gonna pause right there, but when we return, Danielle will share her thoughts on how we get to that place of enter peace and joy. Hello again, Loves. Danielle was just talking us through connecting with our own divinity and love. We like only get there together. We only get there together. Like now, like I'm gonna like the most frequent thing I say to people right now is like, we have to hold hands. We just we've got to hold hands. Like I don't know what else I can say.

Someday we're like another friend is saying I've been anxious all weekend, or or another friend is just I've had this amazing breakthrough right just healed my cancer. Or I'm down and Europe or I'm up, and just like we're just going to hold hands and we cannot give up on each other and and we've got to forgive, like this is the soapbox right now, forgive ourselves. The heart, I think the most the sweetest thing I've come up with the last year is like the heart is for giving.

Love has to flow, love is always moving, Love is always generitive. It's the nature of love. It moves, has to move. The heart is for giving. I think my anxiety, by the way, just not to interrupt you or you just you reminded me. I think my anxiety comes from not giving that not loving, not giving that love like not when I hold with hold from an old trauma pattern. When I withhold, that is where my anxiety truly is, because I know what I want, like, I just want

to continue to love, and it's that's just my nature. Actually, as he said that to me the other day, He's like, the kindness in you, it's just your nature. Like that's just it. And I truly think when you just said that, that hit me, is like, oh, that's really it. That's really the anxiety. That gorgeous, yes, gorgeous epiphany. It's your true nature. It's it's our true nature. It's human nature.

We want to love, We want to forgive. Whoever is listening, if you just get one thing, just get this one. We're not raised to forgive. We are raised to hold a grudge. Our whole entire culture, our whole society, is based on right versus wrong, light versus dark, black versus white, holding a like it's all based on punishment. There's a right answer, there's a wrong answer, there's logic, and there's love. It's not true your truth. You actually want to forgive.

And so many times I've watched myself let myself get talked out of loving, like I don't care. What do I care that they took the money? What I don't? It's over And the system will say you should suthe them, or the system will say you should write it, you know,

get it in writing, or it's just all these things. Really, I think when I'm on my best days, I'm really over it, but I talk myself into not being over it, and I clamped down, and the blood vessel shrink and the anxiety comes, and I one of my greatest awareness is about forgiveness. Is actually I can tap into that place of kindness where I don't even have to question whether I forgive someone. It's I have to ask for forgiveness and who do we need to go clean stuff

up with? The liberation that comes from that is incredible. Like just about three weeks ago, I had my ex husband over for Tea that hasn't happened a lot since we got divorced, and just said, you know, I got two things to talk to you about. One, let's talk about our son's upcoming birthday too. I want to say sorry for something, and I'm going to cry. And I basically said, I'm sorry for being a bag for the last five years. I'm just like, I've been such a

dick about things. And and I also, you know, defended myself a little bit and said, I've never wished ill I've always wished the best for you, but like I held a grudge for way too long, and like it weighed me down, and it weighed you down, and I'm just done with it. And I'm sorry. You don't even have to forgive me. I'm you don't even have to forgive me. I'm just I just need to say I'm sorry. I love that. That's so beautiful. How what do you okay?

So forgiveness, I feel like I sometimes when you feel like you've forgiven, which I do. I feel like I've forgiven the people in my life who I really needed to forgive. But then I'm like, but then there's the people. They sometimes will go reopen that wound without even mean Sometimes people just don't change, and they are they're in your life and they don't change, and gosh, it reopens the wound and then it's like, did I really forgive? Or do I have to go forgive again? And it's

it's like are there layers to that? And maybe it's the forgiveness of that's just an understanding and acceptance of that's just who they are. M I think when forgiveness happens, it's real. And then they circle back and you get agitated again. It doesn't invalidate that you really did forgive that one time. Everything is always moving, you're always growing. The subconscious is huge. There's like more ship in your

basement you've got to clean out. So like, let's not invalidate that we were loving when we were And you know, some great advice I got from one of my shrinks was sometimes you gotta you gotta go in knowing there's a chance they might not have changed. They might have

there's always room for a miracle. And then you're going to get wounded and you're going to pull out and repair, and then you go back in, pull out, repair and you go back in, but you kind of know who you're dealing You've got an idea about who you're dealing with. And then a logical spiritual question would be like, well, you can't assume how someone's going to act. Oh, come on, but give yourself some credit. Yeah, we want to leave room for change and miracles, but give yourself some credit

for your wisdom. Zebras aren't going to change their stripes. So, okay. I was going for a walk with someone who have that kind of dynamic with and they said the thing that always makes me feel like, are you kidding? Are you kidding? And I just decided that day that I was spacious enough for that person to treat me like ship. I had enough room. I had enough room for they're crazy. And when I saw myself, I really had a deep breathe. You know, We're walking through the park and I'm deep breathing.

I'm like, okay, Daniel, you got this. And I think to myself, I am really loving. I'm really loving. My heart is vast. I I believe what the mystics say. My heart is as big as this guy. I'm okay, okay, okay, okay, i am love itself. Okay. Then I got room for this petty bullshit, and I have room to see their wounded nous. They're they're they're ill, they're struggling, they don't have the tools that I have. It's okay, you can treat me like ship today. And this is also this

goes back to your point about offering it up. H This is actually a very tontric practice. Side note here, lots of people think tantra is just about how you have a great orgasm. There's just once liver of a ton tric perspective. Tontra is really about being presents present. It's the opposite of anxiety and clinging and all of that. And the ton Tric way of offering it up would be to say, what energy in the universe needs this? Take my suffering, take my shame, take my inflammation, take

my anxiety, take my terror. Who wants my terror? Come get it? And maybe some demon beast energy comes and eats it up because that's what they feed off of. But like, we're just living in this big compost, so you could just it's another approach, like who who wants this energy? And then if you're going to give up your dark, heavy stuff, you also have to get in the habit of giving up your light stuff. Who wants this love? And just keep flowing? Who wants my forgiveness,

come get it. Who wants my joy today? And you offer it up to God? You offer it up? Offer h I love that, it's so beautiful. Thank you. Then you're always growing mm hmm you and you're always moving. Things are always moving then, which is the nature of love always falling? It's a current of energy. What happens when we clamp the energy down? We get fried, we get burned out, toxic backup, We're going to get well. I don't want to put this in too much of

an affirmative. There's a high possibility that if we don't keep the love flowing, if we hold back on our forgiveness, we create illness. Because life moves, death constricts, I mean death in this physical sense. Yeah, you just honestly, I think we literally just solved my anxiety. I mean not completely, but I really understand the route. And you know what, having experienced my own anxiety, panic attacks and all the studying I've done, I'm just gonna all you, like sister

to sister, you don't have to have it. It's actually not necessary. Our pain is not necessary for growth. It creates growth. There's no need for us to look for suffering to be good. Of course, The Miracles has a very simple phrase, I have no need of this, and I'm really getting it. I'm really getting it. I have no need for this. And you know how important it

is to like choose correct thoughts m hm. And how when we're in those anxious, dark places we've got to you know, and I know like you feel like you're at the bottom of this cavern you can't even get what the right thought is sometimes to get you out of the pit. Yes, but all what I say to myself right now is I have chosen be beauty. And I've worked on these words, like do I say I'm choosing beauty? Do I say I've chose beauty? I choose it.

I've decided to put in past tense because I know that my soul already chose, already chose me, and my human self is just waking up to it. I have chosen beauty so I can see the beauty and the anxiety. The anxiety dissolves, and then I start to see the beauty in my life so much to be grateful for. I see the beauty in this mess that is, and I am without judgment for all of it. I don't care if you choose to get vaccinated or not vaccinated.

I see the beauty in your choice. I don't care if you choose to sing and use your gifts or not. I'm going to see the beauty. I don't care if you harmed me and stole from me. I'm going to see the beauty. And I'm going to see the beauty in my day. And just like you know, you're having this epiphany of like it's this clamped down love and you're just you're saying, you're just getting joy. I'm just realizing, you know what I want, asked me what I want? Lean what do you want? I want to be happy. Yes,

I just want to be happy. The Divine Mother wants me to be happy. There's no reason to not be happy. I'm finding all this evidence to support happiness. You know, Tick not Han teaching saying we all missed the point. We all think that the Buddha was talking so much about suffering. The Buddha was happy, of course, the miracles talking about the result of love is happiness. Love and happiness go hand in hand. The meta Bovna prayer, it's my thing. Now, May I be happy, May I be healthy,

free of suffering free of mental anxiety. May I live in peace, May my life be blessed with ease. And then I offer you that blessing and all of us that blessing. That's a prayer from the Buddha himself. If the Buddha is promoting happiness, I'm finally in and the warrior and the warriorship is how to be happy in these times? Because the egos and any kind of thinking person is going to say, but now, but that's always the case, That's always the case. How can we have

been happy in the depression? How can we have been happy in the dark ages? How do we be happy as the world is clearly unraveling? Yeah, we need to also unravel. Yeah, I love it. Thank you, thank you for your wisdom today. This has been so healing for me to sit here with you. And I'm just so grateful. And I have I always ask um, and I know you love music so much, so I'm excited to hear this.

I always asked what we have something called the Holy Five, which is can be five of your favorite songs of now, five of your all time favorite songs? If you had to choose five, what would they be? And why? Well, Allelujah by Leonard Cohen. Oh yeah, because that is a song of inclusive love. That's a song of resurrection mm hmm. And I so relate to Leonard's Holy Human Struggle mm hmm.

Not to kiss up. But my most cathartic dancing, sacred dancing, has been happening to is it throw your arms around the roll of throw my arms, row my arms around the world. I have a playlist called Sacred Dancer, and I have throw my arms around the world three times to strike. And I'll tell you sometimes I turn it into the affirmative that not if I could throw my arms around the world, but I change your words, if that's okay with you. And I said, yes, please, I

throw my arms around the world, and I put healing it. Yeah, I love it. I'm going to do that. Yeah, I think I love to do like the follow up. Put her on the next album, Yes, totally, that'll be the That'll be the next remix. I would put in something about said O'Connor mm hmm, because I love how she has been so open with her own insanity m hm, and so devoted to God. A song of good hope. I think it's called by Glenn Hansard, So I don't know that song. Oh he's so beautiful. Watch the Sun's now,

you know what? Okay me, you'll be fine. Just stick close to me and make good. And the Bruce Springsteen song that Glenn Hansard and Eddie Vetter did a cover of, uh drive all night. They say, Oh God give me something, I'm afraid to lose m hm, and I wish that God was Samya wol soon miss something and I'm afraid. Yeah what a great lyric. Yeah, I know it's so good. I love good lyrics. I really do so beautiful. Thank you You're such a blessings. Appreciate you. Thank you so much.

I'll love to you you too. And that wraps up this episode of Holy Human. Thank you all so much for joining us for this conversation. I don't know about you, but I feel like I just got wraps in a warm blanket which goes so patently. And please share your thoughts with me in the comments wherever you're listening, and don't hesitate to pass this podcast along to anyone in

your life you feel could benefit from listening. Bye. On the next episode of Holy Human, join me and the brilliant doctor Judd Brewer as he helps us unpack and unload the very loaded topic of anxiety. You won't want to miss this one, I promise you. And until then, my loves my, your heart to be filled with forgiveness, acceptance and much joy. Holy Human with Me Leanne Rhymes

is a production of I Heart Radio. You'll find Holy Human with Leanne Rhymes on the I Heart app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get the podcasts that matter most to you.