WAGs and Sister Wives

Swine Down with Janet Kramer and I'm heart Radio.

Sarah's back. Last week it was just we.

Had too much fun.

It was too hot to handle, too hot to handle. I mean, we have a very hot show today too. Because I'm staring at a picture of Nicole Williams. She's hot, she is wants to move this paper away from you, bib Sorry, she's a wag. Which, by the way, I'm going to feel bad again. So remember how last week

Weren't you a professional athlete wife?

Am I like so confused looking at her?

I just wanted to make sure I wasn't absolutely losing my marbles because I haven't like I don't have a coffee, but but I.

Mean, no, you know what I mean, I actually don't. Oh my god, Sarah, Wait wait, I'm confused. Wait you don't think that you're I'm so confused. Yes, I am the wife of a football player. But for former. Yes, so, but I just never like, when I saw the Wags, I'm like, you know, they're they look different than me. I'm she just walked in. She looks different than me. She's you know, so what is happening? He Nichol Williams. So I basically just got called out.

She literally just tried to sit here and say, I just like, can't you know, I don't understand.

Like I felt like I couldn't relate to the to the Wags because but then Sarah just goes, yeah, but you're you're married.

A wag, a wag, you were whive and girlfriend of sport you for.

But I just but again, you even saw the show and you rolled your eyes. Don't mine now about what wags the girls.

I'm not worried about that. I'm still suck on the whole situation.

You don't consider him a pro.

I know at the end of our relationship was still playing, but I still play.

No, I know, So, Okay, fine, I'm a wag, but I just like, like what they like, own it, own it. I'm a wag. Well, Larry doesn't play anymore. So I'm a former your former Okay, I guess I just you guys just seem like just so beautiful and and so are Waggy looked in lately?

I know, I like, look at you. Oh she gave birth like a minute ago too, Oh my god. And he likes to tell everyone are you still on Wags? No shows is done. We did three seasons and did you have fun?

Yeah?

It was fun, it was good. It was a great experience. How are the girls? See, I just feel like I couldn't relate to those girls. Maybe that's why. But see, you seem really sweet. So that's my whole point. Let me just circle back around here. My whole point was that last week I maybe had judged one of the people we had on the show because she was dating. She found her partner while he was in prison, so so exactly, so you kind of have that that's weird, so a little I was a little judgmental in the

Bad because athletes, I don't know.

Stop stop. What I said was, I'm gonna feel bad because I also prejudged the Wags before I met you. And I said, because I can't relate to a you can't relate to a beautiful woman. Like, I literally can't listen to you say that again. Well, I'm just and maybe it's because, yes, I didn't meet my husband after his professional career or on the outs of it. But so when I saw the show, I just didn't relate

You're married to a I would actually like to tell you what could be her problem? How long did you guys date before you got married?

Six years? Thank you? I'm with my boyfriend six years. Right now, she's got to struggle and I give it to her. So Nicole, maybe you can help my girlfriend Sarah out. She gave him an ultimatum that said, she said, if I don't have the ring by New Year's I'm gone. It's what month is it here?

I'm not going anywhere.

You have to try, right, you got to like light a fire, well if it were not ready, like I can go full psycho, but I'm not ready to go full.

Psycho yet, right, So how did you get the ring?

Please?

Did you wag out?

I can't.

I was actually really patient, but until like the last the last year, like the year he proposed was like the year where he was like, oh god, she really wants My thing was, I'm getting older. I want to start a fan. I'm thirty five. Okay, me too, So I wanted, oh my god, we could be friends.

See we have a lot in common already. Okay, same age.

So I was just like, I want to start a family. I'm really old fashioned and I don't like things going backwards on the same.

Right. It's crazy.

So I'm not I'm not having a baby. I'm not doing any of that. Saying like we already lived together. That's bad enough for me because I was like, I want to do it all in order, so we live together.

That where are you from Toronto?

I was born in Newfoundland, so I'm a really small small town all yeah, and I.

Moved to Toronto at fourteen. I love Toronto. I think I got okay, So okay, so you want to go in order ahead? Yeah.

So I was just like, this is just crazy, Like we already lived together, we have our first house together, we've been together for so long. Why are we not even talking about marriage? But you want to talk about kids us. All he wants to do is talk about children, and I'm like, let's come on.

Let's go in order here.

And finally he actually proposed to me on an episode of Wags and we got Yeah, we got married on the season finale.

So I think that he was just waiting.

He's he's also he also likes everything to be like very perfect, not necessarily in order, but when he has an idea, like he wanted to really make it a surprise and do it when I'm least expecting it, and I was. I felt like I was always expecting it, So he didn't want to like give me, you know, he didn't want to do it that way.

So he's like, I'm just gonna wait till she gives up.

Yeah.

Literally, that's where I'm not your way out. Honestly, That's like the thing. Oh my god, did you guys? What was I mean? Did you trust him the entire time? So when Larry and I first met.

I was a little skeptical because he was an athlete, and I've dated an athlete prior, which sport football, So I was already like, we already tested that out. So when I met him, obviously, you know he looks like a football player. I could already tell Yeah. When we first met, I was very hesitant, and so it took about two months for him to get me on a date. Like we'd text and stuff, but I was like, I'm newly single. I'm not going back down that road.

You know.

They get the stereotype obviously, yes, but then there's also something that tells you like, oh my god, he seems like such a great guy.

He's like a mom is why always time out? Why are you looking at me like that? You you were the stereotype like so, and he's looking at me.

Last week. All right, let's keep it going, baby.

He's like looking at me like, see, we're not all like that. You were like that, so don't even give me that stereotypical mm hmm.

Right.

So we already have a wall up when it comes to like any athlete, just because of what we see, what we hear, what we might have been through. So I did have that wall up, and it was like a secure wall. So he really had to like take each brick out one by one. It took like two months and then I was like, okay, we can go to dinner. And then you know, I'm just like I felt like I was judging everything that he did because I was just so like, you know, you.

Were almost wanting it to not work. Yeah, I was. I was like, this is just not going to work.

And I was so against the whole athlete thing, and I was like, we can be friends. But then he was just like so different. But then you tell yourself, You're like, of course he's so different. He wants to date you. He's gonna like, you know, you're beautiful. Yeah, So I gave him. I gave him a while before we started like really dating seriously. I think we met in like December, and we started seriously dating like the end of March.

Okay.

So he wanted to like introduce me to his mom right away, and he was like I found it really cool that, like he just has a sister and his mom.

So I'm like, maybe he is different.

He was raised, you know, by women, and he has a little sister, so he knows how to he knows how women should be treated.

Start your ring. It's like blindly, Oh I saw it minutes ago.

My god, it.

Is so pretty. Do you how long if he hasn't married, then we've been married. It'll be two years in May.

Have you guys started the baby making process not yet.

Actually, which is so weird because I thought when we got married, i'd be like, Okay, let's go yeah. And I think even in the season finale Wags, I was like, all right, do you want to start working on a baby nouse? You know, everybody was like get married, get married, and now they're like one of you have them babies, and I'm like, it's been almost two years. So I

Yes?

So what inspired you to make a bathing suit line?

So I've been modeling since I was like twelve years old, so I was very heavy into fashion and then moving to LA I was actually living in New York for seven years and then when I moved to LA's when I met Larry, and then also when I moved here because of the weather here, naturally, like the jobs that I was booking was a lot of swim where, a lot of.

Beach stuff, a lot of lingerie.

Like it was just a body, body, body, body, body, And I wasn't used to that because being in New York, I was just doing more fashion, more editorial, right, So I just started noticing, like, swimsuits are not like it's it's very hard to find something like for every body type, every size yet, you know, because I was working with girls who were like skinny and working with you know, plus size women, and I just found like, I was like,

Like I'd have an outfit like that.

So I think a part of watching my mom so and a part of being you know, a model being in the fashion world wanted I just wanted to. I wanted to make something that you know, could make every girl feel what size do you go up to?

I go up to a large right now.

But I'm expanding right now and I want to so extra small to large now and I want to go I want to go to like double I think I'm going to go to double XELF maybe.

My next collection. That's awesome.

So yeah, I started off like more sexy and like more unique pieces that you can wear to like beach parties and stuff like that, to incorporate it, like wearing wearing a body suits. And then my I just get feedback from my customers and I listen to what they say and what they want and where are you selling them at? So right now it's online only. Okay, what's the website?

Nealynn Collection? So that's n I a l y and N collection dot com. What is your biggest issue with Larry? The biggest issue? Jump right? And I just like to just get real person like the relationships. It's just like what is it, Like, what do you guys fight about the most or what just really gets you just pissed off at him? She's like, where do I start and then just walk on out?

No?

I was just like, did you guys fight a lot?

When you like did you fight about being married before you're married, Like I want to get married.

I want to get married. Yeah, and then and then you got married in.

And then I got married, and then I just I'm so let's just start off, I saying I'm really stubborn. So he is, like I feel like he's like a genius. He's the smartest person I know. And anytime he's he like reads thousands of books. And right now, every time I feel like he's into a book where he's like, right now he's reading grain Brain.

Have you heard of that? Okay?

So now every time I eat something, he's staring in my face like leave me alone.

Like every time a bottle eat food, okay, he's like there's gluten in that, and there's this and that. I'm like okay.

And anytime he reads something or like learns a new way of, you know, doing something, he'll like preach and he'll like sit down and want to teach me and like preach it to me, and I'm like, can you please let me learn things on my own? I like, yeah, it's enough just watching you do the right thing. I can kind of grasp and want to do it too,

Book, stop and he'll highlight it.

So now he's gotten to the point where he'll go to bed and he'll be reading at night. When I wake up, there's a book on the counter with like it's all highlighted, So.

I should stop highlighting rings and giving it.

Right, He's like, I know you're not going to pick up a book and read it, so I just highlighted it and just leave it out and if you feel like you want to read it, you could read it.

Like, oh my god, So that's there's that. I love that. Well, you're you're really sweet. Do you drink wine? I drink? We can be friends for real.

And Larry just told me yesterday actually that a glass of red wine a day is really good for.

You, very good.

Yes, yeah, she says it all.

Everybody you know that. It's It's true.

She's a whine.

Oh Nicole, You're so sweet. I love you. Thank you for coming on. Everyone, go get her collection again. It's n I A L Y n N collection dot com. And you're just what's your Instagram? It's Justice Nick with two t's. Yeah, love it, Thanks, thank you. Buy.

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So this next guest, guests, this says how do you say that? Guests?

The next guests?

Okay, the next guests.

But it's like, as like we asked for risks.

I'm really our time saying risks because I'm like, it's it sounds like an echo risks. It's just very strange. I don't like it. Anyways, I'm gonna be really honest. I might be a little quiet in this next interview. Oh great, I'm super triggered.

Oh oh, I'm not. I want to know everything.

But I think it's I'm gonna be very I'm I'm judgmental over it and I'm triggered about it.

Well and speak on that, because it's interesting. When I was watching that like a primo video, that Toy had sent one of the couples. I don't remember which one it was.

We're talking about sister wives.

Yes, one of the couples. Which one was it, but basically the same kind of deal. The the potential sister wife and the husband were texting and the wife was reading their conversation and it basically kind of seemed like they were sextying a little bit. And the wife was like, this is this feels like cheating to me? But the white and the wife was like, I'm not Actually, I don't think I'm okay with this.

Was this Dimitrian Ashley?

No, this was not Dmitrian Ashley. This is another couple. I don't remember.

They brought her on board as a wife.

Well, I don't know.

This was just like the teaser for this season. Well, can you ex play the basics of this. This is a guy married to multiple women.

Right now, he's married to Ashley, but Vanessa is here, and he is courting Vanessa to be the sister wife.

Right, but the actually sisters, they're just multiple because because legally, polygamy is not legal in any state.

Right, But so there cannot be another Salt Lake you ta, No, they know their thing is actually even stricter where you cannot have a marriage license with another person. But even in Utah, you cannot have another adult living with you that has some type of marital relationship with you in the same house.

Well, then how do they have this TV show?

Then?

I'm sorry, I'm I'm so confused.

Did you all ever watch Big Love? No, it was an amazingly good show on HBO. I didn't Bill Paxton or Bill Paxton he did, I know, God rest his soul. He had three wives and they each had different houses, all next to each other. But they were always in fear of getting caught, getting arrested.

I guess you can arrest it.

Oh, so they don't. They have a TV show. They have a TV show about this, so the cops can go to their house. They know what's going on. So I'm just I'm super confused. Just so I know where you stand, Sarah, where do you stand on this?

I'm like, I'm not kidding, I'm just a little confused. So this man is married to all these women or he's just dating these women, He's he's.

Married to one, he's married to Ashley. And then the whole concept is that they bring in another or female as another quote unquote wife like acts like a wife, but legally is not. So that's the thing I want to ask them. How do they act like what's the must be a wife? So, but legally they're not. Legally they're not allowed to be.

Where you stand on this, Michael, what's your stance on it?

Oh, I don't believe in polygamy?

Well I have a question for you.

Though.

They're basically just having an open affair, So you believe in closed doors affairs. I'm obviously not anymore. But it's like an open affair.

It's like an open relationship because people are consensual. There's not an affair if it's if she agreed, if Ashley agrees, I'm.

Just being Devil's advocate and I'm being are you.

Words into into aship?

I'm just being super triggered. So I'm like, oh, okay, you're you don't agree with this, but you agree with closed door affairs?

When did I say agree?

My heart is racing.

Agree with you.

That's because that's what you did. So I'm like, that's what.

That doesn't mean I agreed with it, but we might find out that maybe, like one of these girls is like, I'm not actually down with it.

I'm gonna get them, but don't feel like you have to hold back you you want to say maybe with like a nice tone.

Okay, you guys, my heart is why are you staring at me like that?

I'm just looking at you.

I'm just you're not using a nice tone with your husband.

Oh my god, everybody whoa Okay?

Sorry, Mark, but I just I get very upset.

I understand where you're coming from. I get it because it is I mean, I get it.

Well.

I was just saying like, oh, I don't agree with this, but I'm like, oh, but you agree on doing I'm sorry, Mark, is this better? Tone?

You agree?

But you agree with having an affair on your wife? That's better?

What when did I say I agree with Like all of a sudden, you put words in my mouth. Doesn't mean I agree with it.

But you but okay, so but you did it.

Though right, and I was wrong?

Okay, okay, okay, okay, time out really fast okay, so real time talk. I hate going to the grocery store. I just do. Especially with two kids, I usually forget the shopping list. Joel usually has a toddler miltdown because I say no to her when she wants something in the aisles. So one of my most used apps on my phone is Instacart. It's groceries delivered within an hour, or you can set it so a lot of times when we're traveling and we don't have groceries, you can

Thanks, Honny, You're welcome, sweetheart. So now here in the studio we have Dimitri, Ashley, and Vanessa from Sister Wives on TLC.

And it's actually Seeking Sister Wife.

Seeking Sister Wife. I'm sorry, that's another show. Good to know. You're right, you're redirected the second season of Seeking Sister Wife Wife.

Okay, So, Dmitri, you are married to Ashley. How long have you guys? Been married?

For?

Nine plus years?

Wow?

Nine plus years? Okay? And Vanessa over there you are wanting to marry her as well. Yeah, so you're gonna have to like, h educate, educate me because I am married to my husband and I do not want another female in our relationship ever.

Which no, just full disclosure. I did have an affair. There's infidelity in our relationship that was two and a half years ago with discovery and that we've recovered in our marriage and relationship. So that's something that we've gone through. So that added element to this whole situation that Janna feels a little bit triggered because of the things that we've been through in our personal relationship. So it's just interesting to us just because of what we've been through.

Yes, so that is where forgive me the tone comes in.

It's not directed towards any of you.

Yes, all, I'm just are you okay with us? Yeah? Why you signed up for them?

I studied an anthropology, so I have a completely different outlook on polygamy as a viable family dynamic.

It's not emotional for me.

It's like, I respect and value the communal, feminine centered family unit. I feel like working with another woman cooperatively together to raise a family and to create businesses, you know, build a life together. It's just stronger in my mind, and I've seen it, you know, in my academic studies, and I wanted to recreate that for myself.

And do you guys have kids?

We do?

How many kids three, You have three kids, and how are the kids around us? I mean, is do you see it? Yeah?

Yeah, they love having an extra mommy, you.

Know, around they don't know any different children or when they're in their native environment, they don't. They don't know, like you don't know you're broken to people make fun of you, you know what I mean. So it just is like you don't have to explain or define monogamy. You don't have to explain. I mean, you define in the context everyone else may perceive you, but it's just it just literally is.

And they're younger too, so six they news the oldest. She's six, Nil's four, and then Kannadia is one. So how do you go about finding Vanessa?

Like?

What was what was that? Like, Hey, we're married, do you want to join in on our marriage? Or how did that conversation start? I'll answer that, Okay, take it away, Vanessa.

So kind of a longster, I'll try to keep it short. Last year sometime I was on Twitter and I saw this show Seeking Sister Wife trending pretty high, and I was like, what is this. I've heard of Seeking or regular sister wives, but you know, Seeking Sister Wives, and people were talking about this other wife on the show, and I was like, well, this show sounds juicy. Let

So you guys, don't hook up them, no, Okay, no.

So there's so many questions. I'm trying to get them all in order. How long? So you guys have been married almost ten years? When did this? Has this been from the beginning? You guys have kind of day been polygamous day one? Yeah, since day zero? And then I mean, yes, it is day zero. When I met her, I was like, my name is Dmitri.

I'm a workaholic, I drool when I'm really tired, and this is my vision version of the family unit, you know what I mean. So I didn't want to waste time, fat off the bone. Let's get straight to it. If we're going to fail, it's fail fast for sure. Had that and she didn't say no.

Okay, And again I didn't say no because it wasn't new for me. It was something that I had heard of before, and I just thought it was the universe's way of playing a little joke, getting me prepared for this new life that I was going to be living.

So have you guys had a sister wife before in y'all's relationship or is this the first time? Like you're really are you just seeking a new one? Or have you guys had one in the past?

I mean We've dated quite a bit over the years. We had a lot of growing to do, a lot of mistakes to make figuring, you know, things out more the.

Mistakes on my side, you know what I mean.

It's just you know, this is this thing where you have to buifur kate like the immaturity of being a guy, right versus like a functioning adult relationship.

For sure, it's going to be my question, how did you look at it? Not as cheating or you know what I mean? Like how were you like this? Like do you have other partners or is it just him?

And then how is that? I would be like, well, wait, well I.

Don't just come home with a chick and say like, well here you go, like just make it work like it's a consensus.

Well initially he was like you fine, And that was hard because you know, the shows weren't out yet. People weren't aware of this even being a real thing outside of a book. So it was like you find her. And then I was like, well, I don't know how to talk to girls, Like how do I.

You know, because women know women better than men. We just doing our threshold and requirements are this big. Doesn't take a lot for a man, just just be alive and we're happy, you know what I mean. And I'm being consertious, but like, and.

I've had I've had women that were more interested in me, and I'm like, well, that's not gonna work.

And that's how I feel like it would be so hard to be like I.

Just yeah, yeah, I mean and then or if the woman was more interested in him, yeah, because I'm.

Super jealous, so I would go absolutely.

Well, I could do too, And so how did you like? Well?

So here here it is for me. And this is a testament to Ashley because coming in as this second woman, it's kind of like, oh easy, you know, she built this whole family and life and children. I can't imagine being the first wife and doing that and then being open arms to me. So that's how gracious she is. I'm just kind of like, oh, here I am paying love me kids, Hey, guys, you know it's it's been so much easier for me.

So are you gonna have kids with Dmitri? I mean I would love to and you would be okay with that absolutely? Yeah?

Yeah?

Did the TV element make this way easier? I would think that a little bit of fame, a little bit of notoriety. I'm sure you've got haters, but like having more public did that make it easier.

You mean to find easier to find or easier to.

Sort of live in a society that maybe isn't as accepting of this.

Well, I think it's it's probably if you try affect it out. Everyone's got their different perspective. For me, it never matted it just because I just it just is like I'm going to live this way regardless. I don't need your approval, I don't need your your confirmation like this is what's going to happen. So no, it didn't make it. It didn't change anything in per se. It brought more awareness to it, and quite frankly, probably more scrutiny.

What tells you to have that mindset of this is what a family dynamic looks like for you guys. I actually you said you studied anthropology and everything, But for Dimitri, like, what was it? Was it your upbringing? Was it religious beliefs? Is it just something you realized on your own.

Yeah, something I've realized on my own, not religious solve to spiritual. There's him her, They out there for sure doing it. For me, it's about feminine centricity. I feel like the the ability to take care and labor this real world is the man is the job of a man, you know what I mean. I think women should be able to express their creative freedom. So if I can take care of you know, work and bills and all

Could be whatever.

What if she wanted to have another man?

Yeah, so I mean, and she can speak to this as well, right for us? I mean that changes the dynamic. This is how this is well because what we're doing is called polygamy or polygyny polygyny specific specifically, if we have another man, it would change to polyandry or polyamory, so they're different relational constructs. We agreed to and understood that we're going to do polygamy, so one masculine energy,

But if she just wants to, like because if you get to sleep with two women, if she wants to go out and have a you know, screw another dude, why why is that a problem that she's not going to mess up that scenario. But if I mean, if you're getting it, I feel like that's a little Well.

It depends on the relationship, as Deme truth saying, like, for our relationship specifically, we signed up for the feminine aspect of it, and me personally, I'm not interested in another guy. I believe that feminine energy builds and creates, whereas masculine energy is destructive.

And that's why when you put a bunch of men in a room, they usually toush it up.

You know.

It's like, so that's not what I'm into, and so it just it wouldn't work for our family dynamic. That does not mean that it's not possible for other people to live that way.

It's just not you know, and it's not about parent it's not about sexual parody either. It's not like, well, you get to have sex with exce and so I want sex with Why Like that's not the it's not the measure to say, well, you get to have someone so I could have some too, or if you don't, there's a disparity.

Now, that's not you know, that's not how you are in ours in our relationships.

Some people do measure that way. They're like everything needs to be equal.

You know, yeah, like if you did a then I get to do be What was the hardest I'm sure, like you said, Charle and Err, throughout the last nine ten years of y'all's relationship to figure this out and to try to figure out the boundaries on what you both need to make this successful.

What has been the hardest obstacle along with that that has kind of repeated itself and kind of making this a successful relationship between the three of you. I'm sure there's more than one.

I mean, the hottest pot is from the man's perspective, is getting past because so like we started off with her trying to find the woman, then I would try to find her, and then we I would be attracted to the woman, and she's like no, diuicce, like this is she does not fit, is not going to work. Or again she might have an attraction, but you know, a different type of attraction to the woman, and I'm like, I'm that interested.

She drives me nuts.

So how do you reconcile you know, these wants and desires into a single person and aggregate that in a way that's gonna, you know, work for like, yes to come. So I think to answer your question, the challenges from me in particular were just being able to move and lockstep with her, not move ahead of her. Again as a guy, you you win? I mean again, we were competitive. So like I'm trying to, you know, let you know that you're good, you're taking care of I can pay

Like, yeah, that's definitely hard.

And I do think too, like knowing what your boundaries are and what you'll accept and the things that will make or break your relationship, I don't think you really know those initially until you actually start trying.

Right, Yeah, So that's why a lot of relationships have failed.

So what is Vanessa?

What is y'all status?

Right now? We're dating, so you're just dating and you guys, but you two lived together or no, YouTube lived together?

Yes?

Do you just like live next door?

Are you down the street or do you live in the house as well?

I am visiting?

So okay, yeah, I mean do you want to get married to her?

Absolutely?

Okay, isn't that illegal?

Well, so we don't believe in state recognized marriage, Like I don't need a piece of paper to ratify my marriage, right, her last name is mine. We got all the financial instruments and legal instruments in place that I expire and all the good jazz.

That's no different.

Well how does that keep Vanessa safe?

Then?

Like, let's say, like crap goes down if you say you're married to her, but then hey, nothing's on paper. You can't really take that to the court.

Well you can, so then you leverage those fiscal and legal instruments. So again, she changed her last name, she can have her own insurance policy, she's got I mean, she's got her account. Like there's literally your marriage certificate just makes it the paper trail shorter into a single document. I have to have a couple more documents. But she has the same exact power you would.

So you guys, couldn't go to jail for what you're doing then because.

We're not legally married.

That's big of me and no ca Okay, So for since we've been Claire since day zero, like we're not legally married, but again she has my legal last name.

Gotcha.

You can do whatever you want.

Yeah, And so that's how we.

Protect ourselves for sure.

Legally.

What is your parents saying, Vanessa?

So unfortunately my father passed away from ten years ago. That's okay. But so my first trip to go out to see them, my mom and stepmom took me out to dinner for my birthday, and so I grew up with my mom and stepmom being extremely close. My stepmom is an amazing woman, So I always felt like I had like sister wives mothers, you know. So when I told them, I wasn't gonna tell. At first, I was like, I'm gonna go visit them, but it could be nothing, so I won't. But then I was like, you know,

La.

Where are you from?

I'm born in New Jersey but grew up in Seattle.

Wow, okay, yeah, and what were you looking for going into this? Did you have like a clear mindset on what why you wanted to get into this kind of relationship and what was it? And Dmitri and Ashley that's like, okay, I had this could work with them.

Yeah. So you know, like I was saying earlier, before I got track, I watched the show and then I was like, about four episodes in, I was like, they community hate so well, they're so lovely, Like something's got to be off here. Let me do some investigating. And I found some Dmitri's Instagram and so I'm like looking through his photos and I'm like, okay, this is his real wife and children and liking some photos. He said,

So then.

The next day he had written on one of my pictures and we started talking and then he direct messaged me and kind and he's like, you know, because I was like, oh, I love you and Ashley I'm a fan, and he's like, you know, thank you so much for the kind words. He's like, there's been a lot of backlash for the show. He's like, I told Ashley, we find our forever wife after this, she'll be a keeper. So at that point, I was like, is he fishing

And then I was like out check.

But as I'm saying this, I'm like, man, Like, you know, I just just could tell I had a vibe with him. But I was just kind of like whatever, he started following me, I started following him. I'm watching the show as the week's progress, and the finale last year, they go on a date with this woman, this lovely woman, to do this painting thing and have some wine, and the woman's kind of being really quiet and awkward. And I'm watching with my friend and I'm like, why is

Here?

What am I like so against? And I'm like, this could be everything I didn't always everything I didn't know I always wanted in a way, And so I was like, you know what. It was a couple weeks later later, but I was like, I'm just gonna write them back just you know, maybe they found somebody. Maybe I'm just gonna just talk to them. So I slipped back into his DMS, and then then we all started talking and it was just like magic, just.

So there's no jealousy at all. It's like he's starting to like you more or vice versa, or I mean there's not you don't have any of jealousy and any of y'all's bones. No, I don't don't.

Yeah, it's not like I said, I used to be very jealous person. But that was like, cause it's it's such a different dynamic when you're dating in monogamy and in that sense, like we're all so close in friends and we talk about everything. The way they communicate, that's what I what I saw. I was like, that's what's missing in my life with it that level of communication and honesty and openness in a relationship. If everybody communicated the way they did, there would be this is a place,

It's like you did in monogamy.

You can kind of hide, right because you can have I mean, people have whole other relationships outside as we know, right in monogamy, but like I enjoy the pressure, I can't hide, like I have to be vulnerable. And by the way, in context to what makes her specifically her and same as her, so she has her own way that she communicates how we communicate.

She has a different way.

I can't like copy this love plan atop either of these women and make, you know, expect it to work. I have to be up front. I have to be claire, I have to be concise. But I don't understand. We have to talk about it. So regardless of the challenges and how hard it's been, like we just we own it, like we just cut this gets straight to it, like let's get to the business.

And so there's no space for jealousy.

I mean, why would you want two women though, I mean I'm enough wife for him.

Like learning how to communicate with two different ones.

God, I'm like it's impossible for yeah, it's like that's I mean, jez Louise.

Yeah, I just again, I love the pressure. I love that it makes.

Me better, Like I have to do you want another one? Like how many? How many do you want?

Yeah, there's no magic number, there's not a goal, right, and quite frankly, it's up to them, right, So if Vanessa actually comes home when we make this work and it's like it is what it is, what you're moving on that path, then it's up to them, you know.

I don't know why. I mean, I get that, but at the same time, like, man, you're like reaping every single benefit. See that's what That's what most people think, where I'm just like, he's just the guy that like he's like yeah, but what else? Well yeah, but what guy doesn't want that? But have different partners and have sex? I know'd on me wanted to, you know, like come on, it's like what but for now you do open? Sorry, but like now you get to be like open about it, you know.

But I used to think the same thing because I've seen the Sister Wife shows on I'm like, okay, that's for them, Okay, But then I'm like, well, I've been looking at this all wrong. Like on paper, yes, it looks like the guy has everything, but honestly, I think Ashley and I get more out of it than Dimitris. Sometimes I kind him bad for him, like you know, but you'll see if the show progresses hopefully and as if we progress that it's you know, there's just something

Well.

Please. The second season of Seeking Sister Wives airs every Sunday on t l C at ten pm Central. What can our listeners.

PM Eastern specific look at? I have Eastern time? Yeah?

Well who put ten? Yeah? Where without women in my life? Right here? So ten?

So you guys have to watch? What can we Vanessa is gonna What can we expect?

What can we expect in the second season moving forward? What can everyone expect to see? Anything? Anything?

I'm going to watch because I really like you and I'm warming up to you, to you, Dmitri, and I can hear all You're just like, I bow down to you. Miss, so thank you so much. You guys for coming on the show.

Thank you so much.

Thank you. That was who wants to start?

Clearly you probably do.

No, No, I'll wait. I'd like to hear what you like. I don't know. I wrote some notes, Sarah.

I did because what I really can knock it over because I'm so competitive that I know you are too. Who's better in the bedroom? Honestly, I just wanted to be like, all right, ladies, like, how are you keeping it spicy?

Like it's competition?

Essentially he's sleeping with both.

I see why, especially in this kind of are you taking your wedding ring off?

You literally just took your wedding.

Ring off all I hand sanitizer than under my ring and anyways, I can see why in polygamy, when the is a single male and multiple female, I can see why women on the outside would just think of it as, oh, it's just all about the sex. I see that. That's how our society kind of thinks about it. Just hearing them talk, I can see I don't personally believe this. I can see why maybe there's more of a some more of a it's more to it than just sex. I can I get. That's all I don't know how

Didn't you think that.

As Ashley was like way more like calm and de mirror. I almost kind of felt like she was like and then Vanessa was like kind of being like, yeah, it's hard, it's but I felt like I was getting like.

Vanessa very she's Vanessa's new to.

It herself, very comfortable, very you know, that's just but it's almost like.

She didn't step off once, Like she didn't even say one like thing that was like.

Yeah, because they've been doing it for nine ten years, but like there's.

A lot of things people have been doing for nine or ten years that are still weak, Like.

Yeah, but you can tell that she's that's just her thing, that that's you know, she's she's comfortable to never.

Want someone else, to never have temptation to never Yeah, that's a little because.

It's for them. It's it's even though they did and say, excuse me, it was anything religious, it's still a spiritual belief of like what they think the family dynamic is. So it's just like if you tell a Mormon or a Christian or whatever that something about their religion they're not Just because it might not make sense to other people doesn't mean like that's just what they believe in. So if polygamy is what they believe in, that's what they choose to believe, then they're okay with that.

What do you believe in, Michael, monogamy?

Oh?

Really? Question?

Mark, Mark, Mark, I.

Just turned my mic off.

I just think there's always a favorite, Like, there's always a favorite, no matter what.

Ways, when you guys walked out for a second, Mark and I were talking about Big Love. The first wife is always in like what I call pole position. She always has like a little more Jews, a little bit more bossise.

She's the boss. What you guys need to watch Big Love?

And then I come back to me, I feel like there's always a favorite.

So back on, Michael, why are you mad at me?

Oh no, that comment was a little wait. I believe in monogamy, and you're like really.

Yeah, really, come on, well come on if you really believed in.

So I can never say. I can never say the rest of my life, I believe in monogamy.

Okay. I was making a joke.

Jokes to an a certain extent. That was not a joke.

Well, yes it was.

I left.

Well, she said before this was obviously going to be really triggering for her, right.

But the jabs, the jabs, like, come on, I'm just saying, like, we can we like I want to be able to talk about this stuff and not feel like I can't say anything without being being jabbed every time. That's all I'm saying.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry that I see that, and I'm sorry that for both of you, and I'm sorry that it's triggering, and I apologize that you're upset and it's triggering for you.

I'm sorry I jabb do you. I didn't mean to jab. I was making a joke, but is very triggering when you say that that's what you believe in, but yet you don't live that.

I do live that.

You didn't live that, Okay, then that's different.

Okay, saying I don't live that and I didn't live that is totally different. Okay, currently presently, for the last two and a half years, I live that.

Okay, sounds good.

Sometimes, Michael, I'm just gonna throw one thing in there. A humor or sarcasm can be a way of healing.

Oh, I know that so sometimes, but it's also can be your way of hiding feelings behind something.

Well, my feeling is I'm like, well, don't say that.

What would you rather say? What do you believe in? Michael? I believe that.

I was a piece of No I would have said, like, I know you might not believe it's because of my past, but I believe it. You know, it's just a triggering situation. But I would like to say, though, wouldn't it be easier just to have done that instead? Like I mean, is something where you could and you.

Could do that because I didn't know we were talking about us. I thought we were talking about the people in here, and you just asked me a question, what do you believe in? My personal belief is monogamy? Right, Yes, I didn't live by that, right, So that's just triggering. I understand that.

I believe you, Michael, I believe you.

I believe me.

Yeah, I believe you too.

Okay, everyone looked at me.

I'm just staying silent in the corner. But like, oh, I think is sing.

I think it's interesting and I think that, like I respect you guys so much for being willing and open and be open like that, and yes, we're going to have you know, difficult interviews like that where it does trigger and then it becomes so interesting and.

Janna's so open, like she's so.

You know, letting it out.

I think that it was a joke, but there was like it was your way of being funny but also hurting. And he gets that because I'm the same way I make jokes and I'm uncomfortable. Yeah, but it obviously hurt.

Yeh.

Yes, I'm sorry that you were triggered, okay, and that these past feelings came up for you, and I can understand why they would.

Okay, I'm shutting down. No.

Now i feel like I'm like in preschool and I'm like, okay, you apologize.

Now, you apologize. I did apologize. I said, I'm sorry.

Okay, that's her.

Now make eye contact with them.

My question is like, what happens now?

Because I like them, you know, my heart is breaking a little bit for both of you, because Janna's emotional and Michael's emotional and.

It's so raw. So what happens now?

Is this where we go sideways and then like you guys, hold on to it. Is there any way to like talk a little bit more and then really let go and be okay when.

You walk out of the room, Well, how much time do we have whatever you met? No, I just again, I just when you say that that's what you believe and then you didn't do it, that's just very triggering.

What would you, okay, calmly and realistically, what would you rather me say? And now? Moving forward? In situations like that, is it something where.

You acknowledge the past and the pain?

Okay?

I think how much longer is he gonna have to acknowledge the past in the pain? That was my next question, like, like, I'm like, obviously, come on, but you know, for a little bit longer you what will make you feel better?

Maybe for a long time?

I think so, yeah, And I think that's okay, and that's okay. And I think that you both know that and that's okay, right, and I and I do I agree, I do know that, and I think that is okay.

Sure? Absolutely? Maybe with this I should have been more conscious of it being so triggering and acknowledged that, so I apologize sincerely. I do.

Okay, Okay, I'm sorry that I made a joke trigger that was a little harsh Sarah's class.

Yeah, I think I think neither of you needs to apologize for how you both felt.

Do you know what I mean?

Like the joke maybe whatever you can apoloize for that, Michael can apologize for, like maybe not staying more calm or centered from the joke, but like what you both feel is so real, And I acknowledge your emotions here and you both deserve to have them.

Yeah.

And I do believe Mike Well.

I believe that he currently is current mode is one hundred percent in on monogamy.

I don't believe in wance. A cheater always a cheater. I think we can grow from our mistakes.

Thank you, Mark Wow, I agree.

I agree with that too.

We all agree on some.

Evolution.

What is it? I don't know.

We're growing, We're growing, We're growing.

Nothing feels more appropriate right now, than a commercial.

Wow, thank god?

All right, Mark, can you read couples too far? Yeah?

This is light in the mood I think From Haley. This is an email sent to Jenna Kramer at iHeartMedia dot com. What are your thoughts on couples who don't fart in front of each other or talk about their bathroom time? I think that it's weird. Our friends are getting married and her soon to be a husband has never farted in front of her. He's never, he never has. I get trying to keep some mystery and trying to

That's me has tie fight. Wait, you've never farted in front of time?

Okay, let me tell you something really funny. No, I mean he's had a little slip ups, but I just like die laughing and then like we don't, like I can't focus on anything for the rest of the day. But literally four years in four years in we're in New York, every time I had to go to the bathroom or do anything, I was running downstairs to Starbucks. He literally thought I was having an affair because I was like, I'll be right back.

I was going to I was like, not happening.

I've never been I never.

Went in a public restroom. Oh, I was a fact that.

I was doing loops.

I'm running like up.

Where are you serious that you've never farted in front of him or took a poopy in the bathroom.

Well, things are getting complicated now that we lived together.

Those people at the Stars, we ever heard you fart?

No?

Wow?

No, I mean, don't let Janet fool you. It's it's drew and far between with her. She just like went out the other day. She no, no, she was seeing it right behind me at the desk.

Thought it was going to be silent.

I was just like she was holding Jays and she's like Jays.

I'm like, yeah, okay, I thought I was going to be silent. Remember the first time I fired in front of you.

First time she farted, we were in a hotel. Who knows what city I was.

I think we were in Texas.

Yeah, and she far the same thing. She thought it was gonna be silent. It was the first time I heard her fart. When we started dating. I had it on camera and I videoed. I was video she was like hiding herself off in the corner.

Like I thought, yeah, because he the way he looked at me, I was just like I read hid in the corner.

I had a room in college who literally thought was their thing. They would sit on top of each other and fart on each other, and that was not happening.

Now this guy, I mean, he farts all the time now. But that stings.

But that's like for a guy, at least just for me. When you get to that point of in a relationship, it's so like it's like, oh, it's like I made it, you know, and thinking about dating all over again. If you think about dating all over again, it's like I gotta go through the whole process. No, I don't think they like get to the point where I can fart in front of her.

I just think I mean, if I farted in front of you all the time, I mean, wouldn't you if that's not sexy, you know what? It would be gross? Like we have to And so sometimes I wish that you wouldn't fart as much because I'm like, don't you want me to be attracted to you?

And you walk in You know what's funny right now is that Joli knows the word fart. So I was changing her in the middle of the night. The other night, I took her diver off, but another one on. So she was naked from the waist down and she farted, and she goes, oops, I fart.

She doesn't know how to add the eted. Oh, I fart, and so like IM far in front of her, so like, mommy fart.

It's hilarious say that.

Yeah, so I do have one more email that it's fascinating. All right, this one takes some real turns that I did not expects.

Like a rude.

Lindsey says, I've been married to my husband for six years and we have a five and a half year old daughter, but I'm not sure I love him. I thought it might be because I like girls. My husband and I decided to try a threesome with another woman. They go, I have never really been about sex, and to be honest, I enjoyed the threesome, but I still felt like, eh, whatever, I never really want sex, and I'm I'm not sure I have ever been in love. What if I'm not capable of loving someone? Is there

That's a lot. I'll start with the beginning. I feel loveless marriage.

I think it's a good place to start, Sarah.

I think loveless marriage is common. A lot of people maybe stay with their Why are you looking at me like that? I'm sorry you, Mark and I are both looking at you like that.

I am not.

I have a lot of friends who say that they've fallen out of love with their spouse and that they stay with them just for the kids.

I hate that.

Wow, you Mark, you're happy you love your wife. People falling in and.

Too, But that.

Makes me sad. I think people can go in and out of love. Yea, And I think that's some of my friends. I think have felt that, and they you know, but they stay because they have kids and I, you know, I know, I've you know, so I can see her saying, but I've also loved my husband and you like sometimes what and I do? Yes?

While because didn't she say she doesn't like suck?

Yeah, she never really wants it, she's never been in love. She thought maybe women nah, like it doesn't sound.

Like I wonder it sounds like she's on like pills or something like that, depressed, like she doesn't.

Have it's like she loves her like obviously.

I would say, yeah, to get off. If you're on anything, I would talk to your doctor and get something a little lighter that you can have more emotion.

I wonder, I wonder if she knows what her love languages are, just because language that could be interesting for someone who like you said that. You guys are saying, like she seems numb. We'll find out how you register love.

Yeah, and if it's not him, then you don't want to stay in a loveless marriage forever. That's just no.

But if she educates herself on that and then tells her husband, hey, this is how I receive love, give it a time, Give it a time to for him to trial that and be like, if he's doing those things and she still doesn't feel it, Mark is.

Just like that was a very evolved response from.

Jesus.

Thank you. Yeah, maybe he does believe in monogamy after all. Who thought no?

But that that is that is a very point, honey, That is a very very evolved therapeutic response. I bet if they talk to.

Each other he'd probably be like, yeah, you know, I kind of get it. I can feel like you don't love me, and.

This is what I this is how I would like to receive love sounds.

Thank you to Legacy Box. Go to legacy box dot com, slash Janna and save forty percent today. Instacart get ten dollars off your first order. To get this limit of time offer, go to instacart dot com or download the mobile app and enter our promo code Janna during checkout. Oh, you know what we forgot to talk about?

What do we forget to talk about using Mike's razor?

What is wrong with that?

You know, it's really funny about this though. I'm glad you brought up here because yesterday you showered first I did, and I was gonna ask you. I saw. I looked in the shower and my razor it looked like it was turning. It was turned a different way.

Wow.

I know you didn't because and I started. But what's crazy? I almost brought this up to you. I started feeling like anxious, like angry because it's something small. She didn't end up. I ended up seeing her razor that she brought into the bathroom because it wasn't there before. But like these razors are expensive, Like I I have a strategic amount of times that I use one razor because I mean, I shave my face. I shave my head like a ball guy. We use it a lot, a lot.

Why does it bother you that I shave my huha and then you put it on your face.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry because.

Inside it's just it's just there.

If you shave your legs, even if you shave your legs and then I shave.

My legs are cleaner than your face, it's not.

It's just still it's still your skin and bacteria.

It's still those things. Just like I'm dirty, Okay, it's very I just.

Like, just like I would like to use my towel, but yesterday I used my towel, so I had to use your towel.

When you get out of the shower, you're clean, Michael, I.

Still like use my towel. I'm sorry, it's just what I like to I like to use my towel. I like to use my razor. I like to use my tea.

Are you I don't ever want to use your tooth brush. That's disgusting. That's like you you're getting like steak out of your teeth. But when you get out of a shower, when you get out of a shower, you are physically clean, unless you don't wash your body with soap.

All right, just picture this picture. I use your towel and I'm clean. I'm wiping up my butt, cleaning everything, drying it all off. And guess what next time you, Next time you shower, you take that same part of the towel. Little do you know, that's where my butt was, and you wipe it up. You're drying your face were clean or not, that's a food for thought.

Well, if it's clean, I don't care. Okay, you make me go down there anyway.

So I got no in that game this season. I don't know.

We're done.

You're welcome.

Oh my god,