Wind Down with Janet Kranler and Michael Coughlin and I'm her radio podcast.
How does it feel to be with a cougar?
Wow? I love it. And now this is where you say I'm four years older than you.
I am. I'm thirty seven years old, which means I'm four. I'm technically now a cougar.
Is that the cutoff age?
I mean, I think, honestly, cougar is like ten years older. But I like to think of myself as a cougar. But thirty seven just sounds so old, Like I remember going to my mom's like surprise thirtieth birthday as a little girl, and I'm like thirty seven. Woolf. Oh it's funny. I was reading my DMS too, and someone was like, there you go. I thought Michael was an ex professional hockey player until I saw the video of the All pline hockey and then it confirmed that, Oh no, it was football.
Clearly was a nice that was so much fun.
Michael did a great birthday for me, went ice skating. He runted out this like it's like a half rink in a in a sense. Yeah, it's like a hockeys hockey school camp. But they also runt out the ice, and so we played hockey, yeah.
Running for two hours. Yeah, it's like a it's called the Hockey Lab in Franklin, and it was awesome. So we had him set up the hockey nets and we had a bunch of pucks out there and Jan and I were doing passengers and playing one on one and then we had Jolly join us for the last hour, which was awesome.
Which, by the way, I got a little hate because Jolie wasn't wearing a helmet. Is she supposed to wear a helmet like I was. I didn't wear helmet when I started. I learned how to skate when I was five, same age as almost Jolly, and I didn't wear a helmet. But then again, did I even have a car seat when I was fine?
Right, exactly whatever people are going to say, whatever they want to say. She was fine.
Yeah, she's a good skater.
Yeah.
If I mean Jace, I would for sure put a helmet because he doesn't know how to say right.
Yeah, he falls over every two seconds. But no, I mean whatever, we were there, she was fine. If it was like a group setting, there's more people to like run into her, but she was We saw her fall the first couple of times, and she was in control of her falls.
Yeah, she knew to fall on her butt, right, It's not.
Like she was Yeah, she knew how to fall. Wasn't like she was just feet out from under straight unto her back, her head.
I just don't know though, if I would have the like if I was a person. I mean I am a person, but like I don't know if I would look at someone saying and be like, oh, your kid should be wearing a helmet. But then again, I feel like I did it that one time when we went and saw Jurassic Park, there was a three year old watching the movie and she was like scared, and I'm like, what mother would bring a child here?
We were watching Sons of Anarchy the other day and you're and they showed Jack's crib. She's like, there are so many things wrong with that crib.
There actually was they not accurate? It was a baby and it was able to roll over, and it had blankets, and like, I'm like, Sid's people right exactly. And then now that the baby's older, the crib needs to be lowered. Like whoever was the script person on Sons of Anarchy? Which by the way, you know, amazing show, our favorite show. But uh, there's gotta be careful. So yeah, I guess I am kind of like that person. I just don't tell the person even better, even.
Better, speaking of no, that's stupid.
What Monopoly kills all marriages?
Yeah, yeah, that was a great way to end the night, playing Monopoly against each other with your spouse.
So fun, which, by the way, we're going to finish. We haven't finished it yet, but we go. And here's the thing, you just landed on board walk.
Playing with two people is damn near impossible because you need a third party to kind of be Switzerland when it comes to trading trading properties.
I played it. I think I played it really smart.
Yeah, I FD myself just to move along the game.
No you didn't. I got those three properties the Purple put houses on it before you even had like a three because you were passing up those don't pass up the cheap opportunities, that's all I'm saying.
Yeah, you're a house poor no anymore anyway, So we but we made it out without fighting, shocking, which is successful. Yeah, only because he's your birthday. I think any other day I go like this is speaking of other relationships. Oh oh, so current events going on right now?
Oh are you bringing in the didn't didn't? Didn't didn't. This is Michael Cosson with Pop Current Events.
Yeah TMZ. NBA star Malik Beasley's wife Montana Yao reacts to photos of him and Larsa Pippen holding hands.
I'm sorry he has a wife.
Yes, and he's blatantly holding hands with another woman in this picture at the airport.
Oh and she okay, I'm ready this and then the wife comments, wow, I don't even know this man. The model twenty three wrote on her Instagram stories, this is wild, y'all. I'm seeing it for the first time. Like y'all, yeah, you know what I I had. I was just reading this thing on us weekly because on Instagram and the Pip and Girl. Okay, I know, I know the story.
The Pip and Girl just wrote back and said something about salt, like don't believe everything you read on social media, like basically calling out the wife like she knew this was going on.
Uh.
But that's how That's what I got from the message. Because if you're like, that's ballsy holding hands in like a mall, it's one thing to be coming out like a I mean it's not okay, not okay at all, but coming out of a bar drunk like he's very aware that moment they look like they're at a mall holding hands.
Or the airport.
Yet we're not just that that. You gotta be really stupid to beat to do that. Yeah, so maybe there is something behind the scenes that his wife is like plain innocent.
I don't know, But didn't you say something about that girl though? Because I don't know who that girl? I don't know who any of these people are.
Larsa Pippen is Scottie's Pippin's ex wife.
Who's Scottie Pippen, Hall.
Of Fame basketball player for the Bulls, Oh, Jordan and Pippen.
I mean, the name sounds familiar, but I'm like, and then who's the guy she's holding hands with? Now?
He's a basketball player.
I don't know.
Oh, so she's like a basketball Yeah.
But I just I feel like I've heard her name, like another headlines similar to this or something.
So she's a homewrecker.
I'm not saying that, but I'm just saying I feel like I've heard her name.
It's a song by Miranda home record. That's not that's Oh no, what's not? Miranda Limbert was her name. Don't know what you know what you're doing. I think you're going to Brulin what you got Easter? But you're not. Yeah, you're just a home record. Come on, that's a good country song. Who sings that? Easton? You're my country?
Did?
Yes?
S Gretchen Wilson. Thank you? It's a good song. And then did you see the other stuff? Sorry? I just want to since I'm talking on country right now, because she kind of had she dabbled in country.
Oh yeah, let's talk about that. But first we have our amazing guest, Rachel Rogers, who is the CEO of Hello seven, which her whole mission is all about, you know, impowering women to become millionaires essentially.
I cannot wait to talk.
I know. She's got an amazing website, a lot of cool stuff, very successful lawyer and entrepreneurs. So let's take a break and then have Rachel.
Hey, Rachel, how you doing? How good? How are you guys?
Good?
Thanks for coming on the show with us.
Where do you live?
I live in North Carolina, Greensboro.
I was just gonna say wherever you're at right now looks really pretty and just like it.
Is really pretty. I just want a fifty three acre ranch in the middle of a pandemic.
Yes you did, Oh my gosh, fifty three acres. Do you have horses?
And yes, we have a beautiful horse barn. We don't have horses yet. We're actually in the process of acquiring our first horses. So all I do every day is research horses.
Sorry this is so random, but horses, like they really they like they know what's going on in you.
They're very smart, and I feel like they're therapeutic to be around, you know, and right now, like it's one of the few things that I can get my kids, like my kids can do and like be outside, you know.
So how many kids.
Do you have?
I have four?
What are their ages?
So my three little ones are nine, seven, and two, and then I have a twenty year old stepdaughter.
Wow, bite the range? How is? How is having four kids?
It's a lot? But I have to say, like, going from as you guys already know, right, going from one to two is like you feel like a train hit you, you know, because you're like, holy crap, Like I was up all night with one and now this one's hungry, like I don't got time for that. I want to sleep. So but then you know, once you start adding after that, it's like whatever, you could add three more and it won't matter.
Good to know.
I like it because we're we're considering a third right now. We're going to go talk to a doctor here soon. Ganas like, well, if we have three.
Four, I'm like, I'm kind of with you, to be honest, Like, my husband got the snipsies after our last one, and we've both had the thought like, huh, I would totally consider having another one, especially now that we have this big ass property.
Yeah, you're like, we need a football field of like a team now, like you need help with the chores, like who's gonna hey all the barrel up, all the hayze or whatever exactly.
I mean, this is my husband's fourth, so he was kind of like, I'm done, you.
Know, so how do you Because your whole thing is like we can all be a millionaire, right, yes, so how do we do that? Because I would like to be so that would be great. What's what's the first step in going down that road?
Yes, well, I think the first step is stop making brokeass decisions and start making million dollar decisions.
Oh, like, what give me an awesome example.
So brokeass decisions are the ones where you know they're constricting, right, Like they steal your time and energy, they deplete mental space, they kind of get you busy with pitoli, you know, and sometimes they seem like million dollar decisions like oh, oh, let's put all this effort into saving some money, right, Like, let's not hire help around the house. Let's all do it all ourselves. We can save money. But it's like, do you but is that going to help you make money?
Like cleaning up after your kids all day or not having like like we have a chef, right, and it was like the best thing I've ever spent money on in my life was like finding this chef and hiring them because that's what took up all my time, is like cooking and fighting with my husband and you know, like passive aggressively, like banging pots around the kitchen while I'm cooking because I'm pissed that I have to do
this after a long work day. Anybody ever been there, so you know, so it could be like, well, let us save money and we'll do all that stuff ourselves and I think that's a brokeass decision because if you have the ability to make money doing right like posting a podcast or teaching a class or doing workshops or events or any starting businesses right, then free up your time, hire someone to help you up your time. Spend a
little money up front, because the payoff is huge. You freed up a bunch of your time that you can now spend making money right. And so that would be a million dollar decision, like hiring a chef was a million dollar decision that we made, you know. And so
I think especially women are always making decisions. And this is the money messages that are sent to us is like contract right, like ooh, stop shopping, you know, stop buying that latte, right, Like it's always about like it sends the message that women are shopaholics, that we can't control ourselves with money, that we need to cut coupons and do more with less. And men get the messages of like, you know, be a power investor, right, like
you know, step into your prowess. Like there's always like an image of a lion or something. Right. For men, it's like go out there, take risks, make it happen. And the reality is is that you can cut coupons all day long, You're not going to save so much money that it actually puts you in a different tax bracket, right like it you can't save your way to being a millionaire, right Like, Really, what we need to be talking to people about is earning more and what are
the ways that we can do that. How can we spend more of our time earning more and really step into our talents and skills, capitalize on that scale, on what we're good at, and that's what's actually gonna help us become millionaires.
You know that makes sense?
You know when I was looking at your stuff, Rachel, and I'm gonna read your mission shape, your mission statement, because mission statement, your mission statement for everyone to hear. Because as soon as I read it, I thought of Janna Okay in this way, and I don't think she's read it yet, but here it is for our listeners. Rachel's mission is to help women hit seven figures without sacrificing their families. Insanity. I'm an entrepreneur and I'm a mother.
I run a seventh figure business, and I'm in the front row of every dancer title. I'm picking my kids up from school every day. I'm watching Peppa Pit cartoons in bed on Sunday mornings. If you've ever seen me speak at an event, chances are my three children. We're in the front row. When people tell me you have to choose which family and business? I say both. Hell yeah, that is our kind of girl right there. Yeah, because it makes me think of Janna, because that's you know,
Janna has that mindset. I'm trying to keep up with her and so to to listen and experience women like you'allselves and to be successful in business. I love the fact that it's almost like having your cake and eat it too, right, You're not You don't have to choose that house life to be around the kids and then sacrifice work. So, you know, my thing is when people, when women out there are anybody who may be the one the primary caregiver for the kids, what's that first
step for them to be like? Look, by doing this, you can actually spend more time with them. By doing this, you can set yourself up better. How do you get someone encourage a woman or anybody to take that leap?
Yes, well, I think to start, we have to kind of change our philosophy around parenting and especially motherhood because again right, like, so we can't win as women, right because not only do we have to be like super hot and sexy, but we also need to do all the things for our children, right and like we're not good mothers if we don't, and also do more with cut coupons while we're at it, right, and so like that's these ideas about what womanhood is and what motherhood is.
I think we need to start challenging them. So for example, you know, I don't do my children's laundry. I don't cook for them ever, Like I never make them a mail. Maybe on a Sunday I will heat up some soup, but like, other than that, I'm not cooking a lot of the sort of like labor related to parenting I'm not doing. However, I do read to them every day.
I spend quality time with them. I'm making decisions about their education and their homeschooling now so like their homeschooling plan right, and creating opportunity for them of of course very involved in like their health and well being and
what they eat. I'm making those parental decisions. But I don't have to do all of the labor to be a good parent, you know, and in fact, by eliminating a lot of that labor, I'm actually able to spend quality time with them where I'm done with work and I don't have to go cook or clean or do that stuff. I get to just immediately sit down with them and like play a game, read books, watch a
show together, you know. And I think that's how you do that is that's like, you know, people ask me all the time, like how do you do it all? I'm like, I don't. I hire other people and they help me.
You're a hell of a delegator.
Exactly, master delegator. And that's really what we all need to be thinking about, especially as women, right, Like if we have careers and I and I explained to my daughter because sometimes she's you know, she'll come to like my office door and say, you know, like I want you to hang out with me, like why are you still working or whatever? And I'm like, you know, other moms have to like commute to and from work, right,
I get to be here all day with you. I get to eat lunch with you and breakfast with you every day. We have so much quality time together and like you got to contribute, right, We have a nice house, We have a nice life, and your contribution is let me finish working and you go clean your room or you go occupy yourself until I'm done, and then we're
gonna have quality time together. So I want my children to know that, like, yes, this nice life that we're all creating, you're a part of that, and you need to contribute to that too. Like sometimes it's putting the you know, setting the table for dinner, and sometimes it's leaving mommy alone so she can finish working so she can make the money that creates this life.
You know, what about for the women that are stuck in that situation where they feel like they can't have other people do it because it might not be to the standards they want it done at. You know, like for example, I don't like how Mike folds the laundry, so I'm like, I then feel like I have to do it, and so or and and you know, and
there're gonna be other situations too. But it's like, how do you when when you want to release those things but you're too afraid of releasing the control of those things.
Yes, well this is this is the step, right, Like releasing the control creates freedom and I get this all the time because one of the first things what I tell people to start with cause you know, like I didn't start with outsourcing having a chef, right, Like, I was broke as a joke when I started my business, you know, So what I started with was laundry. I started outsourcing laundry and it was like, you know, fifty bucks right to like have somebody else do that week's laundry.
And that saved me like a whole weekend of like doing laundry. And so, you know, if they didn't fold it the way I wanted, then I would tell them how I wanted it folded. And then if they didn't, you know, like they use like this regular detergent and I'm like, no, no, no, I want the like organic, environmentally friendly like stuff, you know, So I would give them that.
And here's what that does, right, It turns us into leaders when we have to delegate to other people, tell them exactly how we want things done, tell them when they do it wrong, learn how to communicate with them,
you know what I mean. That's what leadership is. And I think the sooner that people outsource hire a personal assistant send out their laundry start like just how having small tasks that take up their time outsource they're going to step into leadership because they're gonna learn how to
lead other people. You know. That means you do have to kind of let go of like, Okay, maybe it's not perfect every time, but you want them to get it like eighty percent of the way that you want it like eighty percent right, and accept that as like that's good enough so that you can be free to be out here being a millionaire.
Sure, no, I get that. I think the hard thing just personally is just like asking for help, you know, because I feel like I can do it all, even though there are days where it's just like I'm just tired and maybe I'm not the best mom because I'm so exhausted by all those things, which then affects, like you said, like you're able to do all these things and then be like really present with your kids and it's like after I'm busy and doing stuff and you know,
and then it's like, oh okay, it's almost like, oh gosh, now I have not that like I have to go hang out with them, but I want to. I'm just exhausted by the time that I get to that time to be with them.
Exactly, and like a special in the age of COVID nineteen, right, Like that's happening for so many women where we're exhausted, and like America is relying on women to home, educate these children, maintain the household, still make money by showing up to work on zoom, Like it is really challenging. And there are stats showing that, like hundreds of thousands of women are leaving their careers because they just it's too much and it's exhausting for them, you know, and
it's just not good for your mental health. So I think that that's how you start to get back to that place of sanity, Like we have to reject the idea that we need to do at all, you know, and that's the only way to.
Get back to that. What can a man, husband or partner do to lift their wives or partners up to encourage them to get to that you know, seven seven figure happy life.
Yes, well, I think one of the first of all, I mean, there's lots of stats that show that even when the woman is the breadwinner, that men still don't do as much domestic work as women do, you know. And I'm not sure, that's not true for every household, but it's true for a lot of them. We just naturally, like you said, like I can do it all, so I am right, and so we just have that natural inclination to do it and we're not gonna wait. We're just gonna get it done. We're not gonna argue with
our husbands every day. Right.
It's kind of like when Mike, when when we talk about the laundry, He's like, I put it in, and I'm like, and by the time I go to forward it, it's already forwarded, folded and put away. And I'm like, yeah, because like we have you know, are just our times, right, yes, So it's like the man tries, but it's just the woman's already like is there before you know?
Yeah.
So it's exactly what you were saying with like asking for help, right and saying like, Hey, I have this big vision, I have this dream, I have this thing that I'm working on in my career, and I need your help. I need your support, and you know, here's
what you can do to help me. And tell them specifically, you know, because my husband when we I was building my business and my husband was staying home at home with the kids because he hated his job and I loved my job and like was creating more and more opportunity. And I was like, you stay home with these kids, let me do my thing, and like we'll be golden, you know. And so he's like awesome, and he's like military. He has got timers going on whole day, like, oh,
laundry's done. Oh time to pick up this one, you know, like time for this one to eat. And so he's very much more organized than I ever was. So you know, that helped, and that worked, and there were still times where we would get unbalanced, but I would just ask him for help and ask for his support and tell him exactly what I needed. And there were times where he had to come to me and be like, you know, I know you're working and stuff, but like on the weekends you could step it up.
You know.
So he's the one telling me, like, you need to do better. And and there were times where he was just like walking around passive aggressive. I knew was pissed. I didn't know about what. I had no idea, Like I really felt clueless because I was just so busy doing my own thing. And until he specifically spelled it out and said this is what I want you specifically to do. I was like, okay, done, but he was mad at me because I didn't automatically know. And I think we as women do that a lot too, right.
We're like, I just need you to know. I just need you to know what I want obviously, I want you to do that, right, And it's like it's not obvious to them for whatever annoying reason. So we got to spell it out.
Yes you did. We're simple creatures. Just tell us straight
up and we'll do it. You know, we just need direction, Rachel, has it ever been because admittedly, to be honest, you know, Janna's the breadwinner in our relationship and has been pretty much since the beginning when we were together, because I was just coming out of football and I've had my moments and still have my moments of insecurity, a feeling like I'm not man, like those old time thoughts of I'm not a man because I'm not providing for my family.
I wish I could do more. I you know, you know, I have these thoughts. Even though she will say, you know, motivating things to me or positive things to me, I'll still feel that way. Internally. So have you and your husband dealt with that overcome that, Like, what's been that time?
Nay?
Make definitely, you know, he's you know, And I think it's because it's just not a precedent for it, right, Like it's not it wasn't as common. It's becoming a lot more common actually now, but for a long time, Like that's not what we were taught when we were kids, right, we were taught like dad goes out to work, Mom does like the house stuff, and even if mom has a job, she's still the one that you're kind of relying on, you know, when you come home from school.
And so I think that's why it's kind of challenging. But I think you just have to work through it
together and be frequently communicating about it. And so that's what my husband and I have done, and I think it was also here was one of the things that was super important for us, that was crucial in our relationship and like created a turning point with the whole breadwinner issue, and that was like he he needed to have his own money because I brought in literally one hundred percent of our income, right, and so he felt like he was spending my money all the time, and
it was really and like he loves cars, he wants to buy car parts, he wants to work on his cars.
He was, yeah, that's how I am. I'm a tinkerer, yes exactly.
And so he felt like he couldn't do that because it's like it's just for him, it's not for the family. And so he was like not saying that he wanted that, but like putting it off and obviously upset about because he's like, I sacrifice so much. I work so hard for this family. I do so much for us, and I feel like I can enjoy my life because I
don't have my own money. And I'm like, okay, well, like let's get you your own money then, And we literally created a separate bank accounts, so we have like the main joint account where all of our money goes in together, you know, like all of my income and if he has stuff that goes on from time to time where he has money come in, and then he we have two separate bank accounts with like our play right, and so like there's a separate amount that's like automatically
transferred into those two separate checking accounts. It's like Rachel's money and Dediaco's money and like so then he had his little his play money so he could do his thing, and he was so much happier it was insane. I'm like, I would have happily spent this money years ago, and you told me, I'm glad you're happier, Like it's less of an issue, you know, And I think it's just important that everybody knows, like here's how I'm valued, Here's
how I'm adding value to our family life. You know, everybody needs to feel that, otherwise you feel crappy, you know. So I think having those conversations and just making sure like and for me, like I had to say more often, like I really appreciate what you did with the kids. I really appreciate how you took care of whatever. Like we just did a renovation here when we moved in to the ranch, and like he handled all of that. He dealt with all the plumbers and all the things,
and I didn't have to do with that. And I have to say that member to say, like I appreciate you, and I need him to do the same for me, right, Like That's that's an important part of it. So and also therapy, you know, like therapy helps.
To Oh yeah, we're big advocates about that. Yeah, I was just I was just gonna ask you, does he reciprocate, you know, his gratitude to what you do as well, because like you said, that's I mean, it's equally as important.
Yeah it is. I think he does. And I mean we could both do it more, right, Like we could both be better about it. It's so funny. I had a friend who's a business owner, and she used to say, like her team needs to hear her praise and compliments from time to time, right, And so she had a reminder in her phone for like every Friday, give out cookies is what it was called. It was a reminder for her to like, oh, let me give out some
compliments to people, like everybody on my team. And I feel like we should do that, Like we should just all put reminders on our phones, like like let me compliment my partner about something.
Affirmation Fridays. Baby, let's do it.
Yea, that's exactly.
We kind of started that every day just saying like what we're grateful for each other.
Yeah, because we found ourselves starting the day almost feeling like enemies. Yeah, like because we're in a rut there for a while, and we're like, what you know, so the littlest things could just set us off or push us away. When it's like and I think it's been helpful the last few weeks. He's like waking up in the morning and just telling each other, Yeah, what we're grateful for, that we appreciate one another, because then you already feel connected, right instead of just a good morning,
I love you. So that's definitely helped us.
Yeah, I think it has two for sure.
I love that it's like a reframe of the day, right, Like you could start the day being cranky about whatever is going on, or you could start the day being grateful.
Yeah, and for each other, because usually we do make each other out to be, you know, the enemy. But I will say though, for Mike, like he's he like is so great with a lot of the household stuff, and we really do do it together, like we're we're minus cooking. I don't I can't cook, but.
Yeah, I think the two things that are more separate is like Jana pretty much does the laundry, especially pretty much, and then I do the cooking.
Yeah, everything else and everything else.
We just we both do. But those are our lanes of expertise.
How And it's interesting too because when you say that, you know, gosh, would I love to hire a chef? Like, yeah, I would love it. But I think I'm so fearful of you know, I've never I didn't grow up having money. My mom worked three jobs, you know, divorced family. It was like if I wanted something, I had to buy it, I had to work for it, I had to get it.
And so now that you know I am seeing income and money, I think I'm so afraid to lose the money that I'm afraid to spend it on things that could potentially help me.
Yes, well, see this is a prime example of a broken ass decision, right like, because and I grew up the same way like you know we I was embarrassed to use food stamps at the grocery store, like hoping my friends didn't come in so that they wouldn't see us, you know, So like I definitely had There was no one in my family I had been to college or grad school or any of that, you know, So I
had that same story and experience. And you know, I think, here's here's what I want you to look at instead of thinking like, well, I don't know, I'm afraid to lose that money. It's almost like by making these sort of decisions that kind of keep us smaller, you're more likely to lose the money that way than you are if you keep building up support, because the more successful you become, the more support you need. And that's the reality.
I mean, this is why, like you know, like Jeff Bezos, I'm sure probably the worst example, but like I'm sure he has a whole bunch of staff, right, Like the more and if you think about it, like you're creating this sort of microeconomy where all of these people around you are benefiting from the work that you're doing. By having a business, by having a podcast, right, by having certain things that you're creating in the world. There are other people that benefit from that. So how can you
do more of that? Like to like it hurts me to know that you do laundry absolutely not outsource this, And.
In my mid I'm like, oh, I got like, you know, right before the podcast, I was folding things and getting ready for what I do afterwards, and you know, I don't know, I just like we're making it obviously work.
Jannah gets anxiety if she has nothing to do in every single moment. So it's almost like, and I love, I feel like I might be putting words in your mouth, but it's almost like time is money, right, is what you're saying. So if you're wasting time doing those things that aren't earning you money, then it's a waste of time.
It's true though, because I mean there's so many things in the day that like I still have a list of things that I wish I would have done this year that I'm like, hey, if I maybe didn't do the laundry or these certain things, like I would have more time to like finally get a blog that I want to start doing, and like, you know, do other things that like I could really that could make money, you know, as opposed to me folding the laundry.
And it's not just like I'm also a big advocate for self care because I think that's a part of making money, right, Like, instead of doing laundry on the weekends, like rest, you know, like actually sleep, like hang out with your kids, right, like do whatever restores you so that you start the week feeling energetic and like maybe ready to take on some of those other projects that you know, when you're starting something new, there's more lift involved,
right versus keeping something going. So I think that's a big part of it as.
Well as a business coach. I'm curious when there's because there's a lot of people that DM me and you know, they either want to be a singer and actress, or they want to start a business, or they've got this idea or they've got this product, but they're like, you know, how do I even get started? Or they feel like
they don't have the right connections. Are those like what do you say to those people to like to it's like do you put all your eggs in one basket or do you keep doing other things and then work your way into the one big basket? Right?
Well, I mean there is the reality that we have we have to make money, right, So, like if you've got a vision or business or a creative endeavor that you want to pursue, like that's like a you do it as a side hustle while you're running your business, you know. And that's what I did when I was like starting my first business. I went to law school,
I became a lawyer. I really wanted to start my own business because I didn't want to work at a crazy law firm where they like throw staplers at your head and scream at you all day.
You know.
And so you know, while I was doing like clerking for a judge, which was like my first job out of law school, I was like putting my plans in place for starting my own practice. And one of the best things I did was start like just connecting with people on Twitter and like meeting them, and then I started a blog to like start to build up an audience, right, so like, and then I just emailed everyone that I knew and was like, hey, I'm starting a law practice
on September one, twenty ten. If you have these kinds of legal issues, I can help you do it. And I just put myself out there and that's how I got my first three clients. So as soon as my clerkship was over, I had three clients in hand, and it wasn't a lot of money. It's like embarrassing how little I charge them. But then that was enough to start to give me momentum and put myself out there
and then eventually build a website and do other things. Right, It's like we think we need to have like the ten step planned for the next ten years. No, we just have to have the courage to take the first step, you know, and what is that? And we also have to like walk towards it. We can't just like wait for it to show up, you know. Yeah, we can't wait for it to come our way. You know.
Well, Rachel, I, first of all, I'm excited for you too, because you have a book coming out on May fourth, twenty twenty one. It's available for pre order right now. It's called We Should All Be Millionaires. So I'm going to go to Amazon right now and pre order that book. But just thank you for shedding some light and everyone can go to Hello seven dot co to read all about Rachel and her mission and all of your work
that you're doing. So thank you for just being an inspiration for women and people out there to keep keep grinding, keep grinding, making that money. And but the next time I talk to you, Rachel, I'm gonna have a chef. Yes, you can't replace laundry.
No more laundry, that would be great.
I can't stand folding his socks. He's got so many socks. The man wears two pairs of socks on a day. So just imagine how many socks I'm having to unfold and refold. Lord Rachel, thank you so much for coming on. Wine down and everyone go get her book. We should all be millionaires.
Thank you so much for having me.
You're so sweet. Thank you. Okay, she is so fun. I love her energy. I don't know why it gives me anxiety to like, I'm like, why would I hire someone off for laundry? Like I can just do it, you know what I mean, Like because I'm so I don't want to waste not waste money, but because I'm like, you can do it all.
You can take over the world.
You can take over the world.
I mean, I like her her concept though, because it is it's just coming down to time is money. And if if you're using the time instead of doing laundry to be doing something productive, then you're doing it for the right reason.
Yeah.
If you're doing it just not to do it, then we wouldn't be.
I think I just have the mindset, Like I totally get it and I love it. I think I just have the mindset. I'm like, you can do it all, and you can save money in.
The process, but you can also ask for help.
Yeah, I got you, and you got me, and I'm free exactly. I mean you want to, like, we can dress you up in a cute little thing, and you know, I can dress up and do the dishwasher and we can role play the hell out of this. Yeah. Okay, So you teased the Kelly Clarkson thing earlier, and I really don't like want to get into their us. You know, I don't want to. It stinks because I never want us well, I never want people like talking about relationship, but our relationships out there, so it should be a
topic of conversation. I'm not trying to get in there stuff, like I said, However, I do have feelings around it, and it bothers me.
What Jana is alluding to is that Kelly's.
X soon to.
Be ex husband.
Is asking for four hundred and thirty six thousand dollars a month in spousal support. And I brought it up to Mike and I was angry, Like I was so angry, and he's like why, He's like, what if what if the roles were reversed?
What's Brandon Brandon block suck.
Yeah, he's you know, manager, and his dad and was.
Yeah, yeah, his dad's married to Reba was they got divorced.
When divorced a couple of years ago.
They're married since like the eighties.
Yeah, so, and Mike brought.
Up a good point like, yeah, if the if the roles were reversed.
And here's what I say to that. I think it's I think what he's doing is extremely spiteful. He has money. Yeah, I think it's very spiteful because it's not like they've been married for years and years and years and years and he has been how many years have they been married? For it? Just it just feels very spiteful.
Under ten years.
It was like, uh, Easton, can you find out how.
Long twenty twelve.
Under ten years he has been working? He he has money, I know, like he's again a very successful guy, networks from a very successful family.
Net worth around ten million apparently.
Okay, he has a lot of money. It feels so spiteful that he's going to now take four hundred and thirty six thousand dollars in the money that she has worked her tail off for her fricking seven years. They've been married for seven years for her tail off for that just it like, as a woman, that makes me cringe inside and I want I'm angry for her because it's not fair. That's not his money. He did not work for that. Like, that's not his money, that is her money that she worked her ass off for.
All right, let me ask you this, okay, okay, because I totally I get your point, I get your your energy behind it. Sorry, So you take your stereotypical what society thinks is the household roles. Right. You take a family like that, You take the husband who's making money and they realized it would be they would save more money if the wife would just stay at home and raise the kids.
This is a different situation. Huh uh No, I would please continue, but I have a rebuttal for it, right.
And say they get divorced? Okay? Would she not? Because what you're saying is Kelly works so hard for that money that she like it's unfair for him to take what she's earned and worked for. So would it be unfair for the housewife or house husband to take what their spouse has worked so hard for?
Okay, Brandon hasn't. To my knowledge, Brandon has not stopped working. He's makes a lot of money as a manager. Let's take, for example, if it was one of our good friends. Let's just call her Wesley. Let's say that her end M. Joseph got divorced. They she quit her job because she decided to be a stay at home mom and raise the family, just like what you're saying, and be the She is entitled to half because she she has held the family together. She absolutely is entitled to half because
they have been married for a long time, A long time. Okay, they've been married for twenty plus years. Okay, she's entitled to that money. No, go ahead, you're smarking.
So, which I get because there is legality behind that, like if you've been married a certain amount of time, Like if you've been married like three years, yeah, I don't think someone can necessarily take off, but seven years.
I mean, so I have a question for you, okay, because like you said, with Rachel, I am technically the breadwinner of the family, right, I truly believe. And this is like I remember when we were going through divorced stuff and I was like, he is going to ask for spousal support and I'm going to want to run
him over with my car. Like I just remember having that feeling of being like because it's like if there's some kind of like not pride, but like I'm like, I have worked my tailor off and he's going to come now because of his poor decisions that have most likely ended his marriage, he is going to now take spousal support from me. And you say you're not, but I just can tell by the smirk of your face.
I wouldn't, though.
Lies because you believe that you also have put in the work in the miles to have to earn some of that capital, which I don't.
That's not false, So then you would not saying that. And I've even told you this when we're discussing this, not on a podcast, just with one another. I said I wouldn't out of spite, out of principle, just to show you that you're not right that I wouldn't do that.
So I would not take it out of spite. But yes, then you think about the relationships out there where maybe they haven't been twenty plus years, but the other person does sacrifice, make sacrifices so one person can be more available for opportunities.
I mean, again, I totally hear you on that. It's just if that is the conversation that was had, if you've had a conversation saying I'm going to stay home because this is going to benefit the household. That's a totally different scenario, one thousand percent different scenario. Then you would be I believe that person would be entitled to having of course spousil support in some kind of check.
But that is what you have to agree on beforehand, Like like if you know, if like you're staying like you're not staying home, like you don't have a you know, because you're the state at home dad. You're not a stay at home dad. That's your decision, right.
But quitting my leaving my medical sales job, regardless of other reasons. Part of that was the flexibility because I was available, more available to go places with you that you had to do for work to be there with the kids. So you could go to a movie shoot or go film something, or go do music shows and bring the kids, or have a travel partner. So that was a very high pro on the list of me leaving my quote unquote normal job.
Would you like to get a normal job again?
No, because then if I do, then it's like, well, why do you have to work today? Why can't you just like take off and like not go and come with.
Me say what I would never say that, Mark. I need your input on this, buddy good.
Because I've been chomping at the bit to get.
I look a couple of things, so many thoughts coming through my head. One is, it would break my heart if you two split up. If you did, I think Mike should get spousal support. What I do, I think that whichever spouse makes more should help out the other one in that situation.
For how long I think it does? For how long I.
He does enough for how uh well, I don't know.
What I would do is I would just give him an amount and say you need to take it or leave it because I can't I it. I feel like,
I mean, just like Kelly's wealth was established before her marriage. Okay, I'm sure she made a ton while they were married, for sure, but she was Kelly Clarkston like she has what she's Kelly clark Clarkson, Kelly Clarkson, Yeah, yeah, yeah, she like she she is who she is and so and I just don't think like it literally makes me sick to think that I would that he again would just be sitting on the sidelines, just getting a check and not working. That's not okay with me.
Game again.
But the example you gave earlier about the wife quitting her career to stay home with the kids. There's plenty of divorces where the wife has a nanny and sits on the couch all day and they get a divorce and she takes the rich husband for a ton of money, and the reaction from women is get it girl, yeah right.
Double edged sword.
That No, it's not, because that's the agreement that you have to have with your spouse. It's if you're if you're a state at home mom, you don't get a nanny like that is your job. Your job is to be a stay at home mom and do the thing.
Family is different.
I mean some it is and some it isn't, and it depends on the situation. I think that whoever makes the most should help out the other one to put no matter what how involved they were in the how homemaking or child.
Rearing, because then if ten years down the road, it's like, no, this whole time it was my money, even though my money was paying for our stuff, Like you could just take the rug from out from under them at any point in time.
I think if you go into the marriage you should have. It should be your money, their money, and that's what you leave with. Because especially in this kind of situation where they both have money, he should take his money, she should take her money. And I feel like he's being spiteful because I have another friend that I hid,
you know, celebrity divorce. She takes her money, he takes his money, and that's just what it is, because it's spiteful to go after you know, and she could have gone after him easily, could have gone after him for a lot of money. Like what I'm genuinely trying to say is if two people have money that came into the marriage with money and have money, I think they should just go their separate ways and say, all right, you get this, you get that. But as with this
apostle support, it just seems to me. And again I don't know their marriage. I don't know their relationship, but I do know that they both make money. It just seems to me that it's very spiteful, and that bothers me because yes, I am a woman and I work hard too, and I know how hard she's worked for her stuff, and knowing that he from what I've seen and know in the industry that he does have money. It just sits very ugly to me.
Let me ask you this, Okay, if in our situation, Okay, if say I was still playing football and I was making the money that I was making, and the same things happened in our relationship and we got divorced, would you seek.
Financials If I wasn't, would I be doing what I'm doing now?
Just then if five years ago, five.
Years ago, here's here's my thing, I would ask for child support because obviously that's that's different how child support Because you're a father, you should pay for child support if the mom takes care of the kids. I'm not asking for spousal support. I would never. I don't want your money. I'm the kind I want. I've worked my butt off for. I don't want your money. I want my money and I and I need that. But child
supports different. Everybody has to pay child support. If I would have to probably pay essentially child support to you. But the spousal support, when two people have money and someone goes after it just seems very spiteful. Now again, if it's a stay at home mom and you know, or stay at home dad and that was their agreement that they don't work, then I don't. Then of course they should. They should get support because that's been there,
that's their thing, that's there. They they're the ones that held the family together. They should absolutely be compensated for the fact that they couldn't go out and get a job.
All right, Mark, what's your question? I want to hear that well.
And also also so just to clarify, you have no problem with Brandon getting child support from Kelly.
No, because he'll still need you know, because that is just in the court of law. I think where that is the child, that money is for the child. Now if he goes and uses it elsewhere, I don't know how that works, but I I I think that every if you get divorced, people should pay child support if you're But again, here's the thing. She's now the primary person, so I don't think she'll have to pay child support.
So I don't know how it works. I really don't know like that world too much, but I think absolutely child support is something you should always pay.
I think the other element of this and the other reason people are really upset with Brandon is and again we don't know. There does seem to be a general perception that he shoulders most of the blame for the end of that marriage, right.
Yes, that seems to be the case. It seems to be.
What I'm seeing on social media is people say it's his fault and now he's asking for all this money.
So I get that element of it as well.
Here's my question for you too, which I think everybody listening now is thinking after this conversation this past hour.
Do you two have a pre nup?
No?
What we have as a post nup. So when we went into our marriage, my business managers in the very beginning in management, said you need to get a prenup and I said, no, I do not want a prenup. I don't want it to be like that. This is us together. And when he went to rehab for the sex addiction stuff, I sent him a post up and said, you will sign this or I'm out, like because I don't. Yeah, So, yes, we technically have a post up.
So yeah, which again I even you said it doesn't who knows how much weight it holds. But we're not planning it on a crossing any of those paths.
Right, and you understood why she wanted that.
Yeah, I mean that in that absolutely. In that moment too, I was willing to do anything, and so signing a piece of paper was nothing for me. Well, I was like, yeah, I don't give it because I'm not going to put ourselves in this kind of situation.
You know where I think, Mark I go and where it gets No, how do I say this? Like, I feel like if we were to end the marriage, most likely would be because of something from the past had come back and a pattern was repeated.
Most likely aka most likely be Mike's fault.
I'm not trying to you.
Said that in the kindest of ways.
He was trying to be like, but I mean, you know, you know, no no Incredibles reference. It's such a good part in that movie. I think it would be really hard for me to then pay him spousal support because I'm like, I didn't want this, and now I'm paying you for your mistakes like it. That's what I think is where my anger comes from, because I do love you, sweetheart, but you are a very spiteful, mean person at times, and I feel like it would you would absolutely do what Brainon's doing.
I'm sorry you feel that way. I told you I would do it out of spite not.
To Okay, we have it on record now that why I don't. We can and I know that I can be too, you know at times we can both be mean, you know, and I just I think that's what bothers me because it's like, I don't I don't want a divorce. I don't want to do any of those things. You know. But you know, but you know what if it's something were to happen and then you were to come climbing up the money tree, I'd be like, Man, I didn't want any of this. I don't want separate holidays. That's
why I stayed married. That literally, Mark, that was the reason why I stayed in the very beginning was because I'm like, because of his decisions, now I don't get to be with my kids on Christmas morning or create No, how dare you? Like I was out of spite, I stayed.
But you know what I mean, though I know it's not like the same face from like five.
Sorry, I'm sorry, it's just like but it's like, how dare you don't get to take that from me? That like, how like no, because of your decisions? I mean, I could see how someone would get so angry about that.
I agree, it doesn't seem like the best reason to stand in relationship, but I agree one hundred percent there's nothing there's no scenario that would make that the desired outcome to be sharing holidays like.
That, I know, and it's just, you know, the messy like divorce is just so messy, and I hate it for Kelly, and I hate it for Brandon again because I don't know their situation. So I'm sorry if we even stepped in it. But I think it was more just to kind.
Of just the principle is what we're talkingalking about. We're not even really talking about specifically. Then it's just that whole principle of the money aspect.
But it did just I'm glad. I'm not the only person. I didn't know if it left other people a little angry, so other people have been heightened about it.
Oh definitely. I mean, plus, she's America's sweetheart.
I mean, anything bad happen with the Kelly Clarkson, everyone feels bad about it because.
She couldn't be the nice She's the nicest person around. So I get it.
I get where people are coming from, especially under the circumstances that are rumored.
Yeah, yeah, I mean, I definitely think it's a spiteful move. I mean, I'm not defending it at all, but yeah, there's other scenarios too.
Well.
Here's to hopefully not divorce in twenty twenty one for everyone listening, because we want you guys to here we go, drum roll, please fight the.
Good fight, perfect perfect plug.
We love you, guys. Thanks for the great Yeah, it was fun. I'm excited for I'm excited for Christmas, you are. What Mike and I have been doing is we've been watching a Christmas movie every Friday. So on Christmas is obviously Friday. So every Friday this month, sit down with your honey and watch a Christmas movie. Al Right, bye, guys.
See yeah,