Adult Education: How Did I Get Here? - podcast episode cover

Adult Education: How Did I Get Here?

May 15, 202536 min
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Episode description

Christos Garkinos is here to help Jana and Allan understand what to do when life gets “lifey”!

Christos explains the difference between “our plan” and “the universe’s plan”, and how to deal with the disappointment when those two things don’t match up.

 

Plus, Christos and Jana bond over a good Michigan comeback!

Follow @WhineDownPodcast on Instagram!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

Speaker 1

Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast. Hello my little wife, hi vebe. This is a debut of podcasting away from each other.

Speaker 2

I know.

Speaker 1

I've got I've got a little blank space next to me on the sofa here.

Speaker 3

Do you miss me?

Speaker 1

There?

Speaker 2

I have a question for you, because I haven't been home because you're holding down the fort there in uh Tennessee, I'm in Kentucky film in my movie. How has it been with me not there? Be honest?

Speaker 1

How has it been with you?

Speaker 2

Like? I feel like in a way you almost enjoy it when I'm not there, Not in a bad way, no where, in a way where you can just go in your office and close the door and for hours on end, and you know, work all night long because you're such a you love to just be in your office and work, work, work, and when I'm gone, that's you know, not that you can't do that when you're home. But also I'm like, hey, family time and cuddles, TV shows.

Speaker 1

Okay, First, the first thing is you're my wife, and you're you're away from the family home. So there's a part of that where it doesn't feel right that you're not here. The second part is that you are away doing something that you love doing. So therefore there's there's a part of me is proud of you doing that, and I know the kids are proud of you away working for the family and doing things that you love and making movies. So it's good to see you happy

and fulfilled when you go and do these movies. But and the third part is my mind goes to a different almost goes to a different place when you're not here, because I know that when Roman goes to bed, So we've obviously got someone looking after Roman for certain parts that and he's been looked after. I'm like, Okay, work as much as I can squeeze as much in and then there's almost like a calmness because I know and he goes to bed, that's like, okay, straight back to walk.

Speaker 2

Well, because the person that's helping she was she was Roman's fascinating part time.

Speaker 3

I would say she was.

Speaker 2

She was like twenty to twenty five hours when he was a couple months old. But she's she's kind of coming for a couple of hours in the morning, leaving and then coming back for a couple hours so you can go do your clinics. Because she doesn't want to be even part time, like she's just she's just really helping us until we find someone. So you don't have a lot of time to work, you know, because you have Roman, Yeah, a lot.

Speaker 1

It also reminds me of my old obsessive self, Like every night I'm having to say myself, put the laptop down, go to sleep. And I think's part of it because I get so much to the but those but when you guys, when you're here and everyone's here, there's like, Okay, you can't work. Your family's here and you need to you need to be present.

Speaker 2

Well, you can work. It's just the time and is very important to me because it's like when the kids are on from school. Kat knows pretty much anyone knows. I'm not really gonna I'm not going to respond if it's because I want to be laser focused and in present with the kids.

Speaker 1

Yeah. Yeah, Like tonight I've got I've got the Yesterday i was filming obviously, and then tonight I've got another another clinic, and then when I come back from the clinic, I've got a zoom with a new client. Like I wouldn't normally do stuff like that at that time. Of night. So I guess it's just like, Okay, there's a and it's from my obsessive nature of Okay, Jana's Jana's not here, so you don't does No, you can't give her any of your time at night, so you just have to work.

Speaker 2

What will it be a transition period when.

Speaker 3

I come back?

Speaker 1

Will it be a transition case?

Speaker 2

I think there's always a transition when you go, because I mean we've spent it'll be a total of but three and a half weeks, not together.

Speaker 1

Well, not not together being together for days with them.

Speaker 2

Two days but I mean not like a full three and a half, but like you know, two days here, four days and then that's pretty much it.

Speaker 1

So there'll be a transition, Yeah, because you'll come back and check the island and see if it's been wiped and cleaned.

Speaker 2

Yeah, I'm a psycho my island. That's all I ask. I literally ask for one thing, you know, two things. The two things. I don't want to come home to laundry because after and I'll be coming from the final week here is overnight, so I'll be working from five pm to five five to six am, So I'm not going to be going to bed until like seven am by the time, because it's an hour drive from set, so it'll be so I'll I'll be finishing and then like coming home that last day with a zero sleep.

So I'm like that, I just know me, and I'm like, I want to come I don't want to come home to laundry.

Speaker 1

I've already briefed Sarah.

Speaker 3

Sarah what not Sarah's job do the laundry. I also like the island.

Speaker 2

It really just like I don't want to see a ring stain on the island. It's just like my one thing where I'm just a total psycho over.

Speaker 1

I don't worry, babe. You know you're not going to come back sleep deprived and have to do laundry and clean the house.

Speaker 3

Okay, thanks.

Speaker 2

I just know how I get because I I.

Speaker 1

No one will domesticate me ever, but I get that. I'm also not selfish and realize you need to come back to an environment where you don't need to worry about laundry and cleaning.

Speaker 2

What's something for you like when you come back, Like, what is something that when you go away that is important to you when you come home? Because I've never asked you that, like when you come back from London, you know, or whenever you go, what is something that you're like, Hey, I actually would like this different next time. Nothing because I always have a clean house for you.

Speaker 1

But even if the house wasn't clean about okay, she had the kids. I've been away for a week, she had the kids. I understand, I get it, But different people when it comes to that.

Speaker 3

Way, Okay, how else have you been with me here?

Speaker 1

But we're not good being away from each other. We're not good. Like I always want to know what you're doing and how you are and if you're struggling. But there's also a part of me is like okay, shun movie set and it needs a time to Like, I know,

you can't communicate whenever you want to communicate. I think sometimes that's tough when when we're apart, because you you might have howls and hours and hours where you don't really get to You might be able to look at your phone, but you can't then respond to things that are on your phone. So I'm always really aware of that as well, that you need your space to focus and operate the way that you need to operate. But I definitely prefer you here that's for sure.

Speaker 3

Well, I can't wait to come home.

Speaker 1

Wait if you come home, what what do you miss when you're away? Like, it's different for you because you're you're there and you're totally immersed and what you're doing, and you have your detached from us, So you're one person detached from the four of us, whereas we we are like four people here who have are detached for you, like you're I've still got Roman and Jolie and Jesse here. You've got no one there. Yeah, so it's different for you.

Speaker 2

This movie has been a harder. This has been tough because I've always at least had Roman with me, and so this has been it hasn't been my favorite shoot with that in mind, with that piece of it, just because I like having you know, I obviously love having Julian Jace with me, but they're at school. I'm not going to be selfish and be like, all right, the whole gang's coming.

Speaker 3

That's just not right.

Speaker 2

So they have to stay in their school, and you know, they'll obviously come up from Mother's Day weekend, which will be lovely. But with Roman, it's like he's not in a school, so he could be here with me, and so that piece is I've just I've always had the baby with me when I was on set, so to not have Roman here is is hard, but also it's

a piece of me. And I was talking to Haley Duff about this, our director, where you know, there's also a sense of as I've gotten older, I would stress out so much to make sure okay, and every break I had to go back to my trailer and had to see Joli or I have to see Jace, and I just I didn't actually get to fully immerse myself into what I was doing, enjoy it and probably give the best that I could do because I was so focused on just making running running back to my trailer

to like see the kids for five seconds and then running back to set. So I would like to find the balance. This isn't the balance. I like like to not have them at all. But of course our nanny situation had changed, so we didn't get the opportunity to bring someone with Roman. So hopefully the next one we can splits fill it, because this is this is too long without them for sure.

Speaker 1

Yeah, what do you think of Lexington? Because we were very nearly doing a lot of traveling, bay.

Speaker 3

I love Lexington.

Speaker 2

I think, well, from what i've I mean, I say that I haven't even been to the city yet. I'm going to go check out Whole Foods right after this, so go into the city. But you know, from what I've seen, everyone's been really sweet. But I mean mostly it's just been in and out of the hotel, door to the car and onto set so but it is it's a beautiful state. Lots of obviously horses and farm country. So and we've been filming at the heiress of the Wrigley so the daughter I believe it is, but yeah,

she's the heiress of the Wriggly family. So it's a Misdy is her name, And uh yeah, we've been at her farm, and I mean it is just doneing. This location is so beautiful and it's it's been great. But I would love my babies to be here. But I know you're you're building and doing your thing and and it's important right now for you to build those certain things. And you know you can't be here where in other times you've been able to. So but hopefully we can find a happy balance on.

Speaker 3

The next one.

Speaker 1

Sure we will, Sure we will.

Speaker 2

And speaking of building things and you know, you're building some new, really exciting things. You're in a way, I mean, I feel like it's a it's a comeback, right.

Speaker 1

That's a good question. I think it's a comeback for the brand, not really for myself, because the Superior Striker brand was building and building and building, and then when I took the England job for five years, it was almost had to suppress the brand because of all the privacy stuff. So there's a lot of different arms of the brand which had to go because of the England rule.

And now I feel like it's so much going on with the with the brand that it's almost like a comeback for for that and the many different areas that the brand can cover. So it's exciting. It's really exciting hard work, particularly the time. It's amazing that euroway filming movies and we've got a sixteen month old who's crazy seventeen seventeen months yeah, seventeen months old.

Speaker 2

Bad to be eighteen mm hmm. Yeah, but no for sure. But I say it as a yeah, a building.

Speaker 1

And I'm building something that I've always wanted. I've always wanted Superia Striker to be in the technology saye of things, and the digital say, so that is Yeah, there's a lot of fulfillment and this building process.

Speaker 2

Yeah, and I see that, and I know that, and I know that you need to be there and building that stuff, and so you know, I support you in that too, and I'm excited to see you. I know it's not exactly you know, the the role, but it's also one of the roles you want to do, you know. So it's it's exciting all of it. And You've got some really new, exciting clients that I'm sure we can't share yet, but it's all very exciting. And so I

see it as a comeback for sure. And our next guest, Christos Garkyos, is also very well aware of comeback, says he has a new book out, so let's take a break and get him on.

Speaker 3

Hi there, Hi, how are you YouTube?

Speaker 4

Fellow Detroiter?

Speaker 3

I know, Wait, where in Detroit are you from?

Speaker 4

I was actually originally born in Detroit. In the city.

Speaker 5

My parents had a restaurant in the Eastern Market for thirty years. Oh wow, and we moved on up and went to gross Point.

Speaker 2

So okay, that's where I was born gross Point. Yeah, I was born in Grosse Pointe and then yeah, and then I was raised in Washington Township, totally in between Romeo and Washington and Rochester.

Speaker 4

That was like farm country back then.

Speaker 2

Yeah, I mean it still is. My old house that I grew up in is still off a dirt road, and so yeah, all the things. Well, let's just jump right into This is my husband Alan, he's in Nashville. I'm in Kentucky right now to meet.

Speaker 1

So I was reading them to a lot of your story and it's really interesting because you've almost became this evolutionist where you're always ahead of the curve. They like when I look at when I look at your how how your storyline develops. Like you started in the Virgin stores, which is what everyone loved back then, going to record stores, and so you maximize that. And then you went onto the the home shopping network, which is the evolution of

going into stores, so you kind of mastered that. And then you went into the Instagram Live stuff, which you were selling all the all the fashion items too. So you've almost become this master of evolution. And you've and you've clearly had your It's not been a straightforward journey. You've clearly had your setbacks along the way, like every like every leader and powerful person does.

Speaker 5

Yeah, it's been so basically like I've been fortuitous to kind of have a life where basically things kind of fell in my lap. And then some people, when things happen to them, do you either take the opportunity or or or I mean I got Here's how I got my virgin jobs. I worked for Richard Branson for five years, which who was like the most amazing man in the world, and I was. I used to go to the Virgin megastore in Paris, and I remember that store in Paris.

I'm chances I would spend ten hours in the store.

Speaker 4

I just loved it.

Speaker 5

And when you're twenty eight years old, you're thinking, like, you know, what's my dream job?

Speaker 4

And I set it out loud.

Speaker 5

I can tell you right now, working for Richard Branson, head of marketing back in la where my life is.

Speaker 4

That's where I want to be. Cut to. Two months later, I was on a really bad blind date in London. Bad. I old my stomach. I had to leave you in the whole thing.

Speaker 3

Oh no, you called this fake stomach gig.

Speaker 4

That I was come out.

Speaker 5

He tried to feed me on the date, I was like, this is not going to work. Standing back, and so I went to the sub Virgin Mega store in Piccadilly and like that's what where I hang out. And so I and I love Billboard charts. I love the music charts was like my thing. And so I flipped I saw the Billboard magazine, which was like a month prior.

I have one copy in the corner, and this is before the Internet, and I'm flipping through it and I flipped to the want ads and there's my job, Virgin megastore head a marketing in Los Angeles, I swear to you. And I was like, oh my god, this is a time from God. I have to get this job. So I faxed them the next day I was and I'm

playing two days later and I got the job. So these things kind of happened to me, you know, sort of like and I think it's like, you know, a godshot that I call it, and I'm able to kind of just you have to you have to like not wait for the universe to kind of like.

Speaker 4

Take you there.

Speaker 5

You have to take that first steps. That's what that's what my job, my life's all about. That happened to me with you know, Home Shopping Network. I was obsessed with it as a kid. I should have been playing sports, but I was home watching Home Shopping Network and hoping, like people will get sell out like this a woman named Adrian, Adrian RPL who's a big makeup artist, and

she was like I actually ended up meeting here. When I was just saying, she's like fifty five years old, I was seventeen, and she's like and she was like a Jewish New York or lady. I even know what that meant back in the day, but she was like putting on makeup and I wanted her to win. And they would hear screams from my bedroom, like when she had to sell out, and my parents like, what are you doing? Like, I'm watching Home Network and I want to be on this at some point in my life.

Cut to you. I have been to get a Bravo show. I have my own Brabosh show for a year called du Some El Rows. And the whole reason why I did the show was to get into the asius and offices to pitch me. I knew that the series was fine, but it was like it was gonna last a year. I knew it so I had like a one year opportunity to make this happen. I made it happen, and I just was When that happened to me Home Shopping Network, it was my life changed.

Speaker 2

So so are you kind of under the belief then if you say it, think it, believe it, then it'll become.

Speaker 5

It one hundred percent. That's been my entire life. I've you know, the first moment I knew, like I kind of had. I mean, I'm like a six spider sense is like I was nine years old in Michigan.

Speaker 4

H'm from.

Speaker 5

You know, my parents had a Greek restaurant. I started working when I was four years old. My parents' restaurant, like they put me on top of milk rate, was called Nick the Greek. He was an impossibly handsome man who was a cook. My mother was out front. They would be screaming all day along but I'd be at the register, like at four years old, taking money. So I was like, you know, I knew there was something.

I knew there was something happening here. But when I was nine, I was being gross point and funny enough. My my grade school is called Fairy Elementary, which is the kind of nutty that I ended up being gay, but by myself playing teather ball. So I didn't have many friends because you know, we moved from Detroit, which is very not segregated, like very mixed, uh, and we moved to a gross point, which you know, Johnna is like the most one of the most, and we were not wealthy.

We were like, you know, we basically integrated because we were dark skinned and Greek. And I took shish kabab the lunch or like, what the hell is this? How do you put pink and green together? I don't understand.

So I was playing teatherball by myself and I because I had no friends, and the ball was going around and then outside the fence was like this high squirrel girl smoking cigarette but she had like really high heels on and I heard the clickly clock of her heels like outside from my ear and if dad manut it at nine years old, won't forget. I said, someday, I'm going to be around that sound. I don't know what, but I'm going to be around what that means. And

it was like a Eureka moment for me. But in typical crystals fashion, the ball came around and hit me right in the face the tether ball and I.

Speaker 4

Got a black eye. So that's life.

Speaker 5

Like life kind of gives you these moments where it's like I think I figured this out and then you're.

Speaker 4

Like, no, not so much. So that's why I think I love that.

Speaker 1

Yeah, what would you? So you've obviously had You've had a successful career and you've had a successful Johnny, what has been the highlight or your most successful key lead in your life?

Speaker 4

Jeez, I've had some fun time.

Speaker 5

I think if I look back at it, I think working in Virgin Mega Store and having all these openings, I dealt with everybody. Everybody, everybody's diva that could be known to mankind. I love music and so it's been a big part of my life, so you know deal, you know, meeting Share. I wrote down a sleigh with share don Michigan Avenue for Christmas, like and that's like

a gay boys dream, right. I think that I think that, you know, that was kind of when I was able to kind of like really kind of come into my own So it's very corporate. When I went for Brandson, I was able to kind of be my own person. But I think the biggest thing is, like, you know, I, I, you know, sobriety is a big part of my story. And so I got sober nine years ago last Thursday, and I got I went thank you, But I went

crazy at fifty, like loss has kind of been. That was like my dad died when I was young, and my best friends died when I was younger, and my really best friend died and I went off the rails and I left my husband. I'm actually the most legally gay man, legally married gay man in America. I've been married three times.

Speaker 4

Legally and divorced twice legally.

Speaker 5

So I think I'm in the given this book for gay records at some point. But anyways, I left my entire life after after my friend died, when when I turned fifty and I went down this road and what happened was I lost everything. I ended up coming up for air basically in May twenty sixteen and was a million dollars in debt. Had just ruined my life, my friendships and everybody, and I had to kind of literally

rebuild everything. And so for me being we're mad right now, being able to tell my story of redemption and having these kind of amazing things happen, and where I am in someone. I'm in people's lives like every day, so there's thousands of people too, and every day to see my Instagram live shows and shop and and have community and you know, and kind of be able to grow it and to this kind of like huge deal has been like the biggest sort of comeback for me basically but compy but not happened.

Speaker 4

One word changed my life during this whole combat period.

Speaker 5

I was in Detroit, actually, Jenna and I was down in my last three thousand dollars and someone said, hey, you're from Detroit. I was living in LA Can you go host to dinner for or some I'm like in Detroit. I'm like sure, I haven't been there five years, but I'll figure it out now. It was like three thousand dollars.

I was able to put this dinner together at the Foundation and a hotel, and this woman and I kind of like connected over the table at dinner that night, and I have breakfast around with me and I knew she worked with the hotel chain.

Speaker 4

I don't know what it was like. All this is like really cool. It was at the Foundation Hotel, which is in.

Speaker 5

Detroit downtown the old Firehouse, and we're just talking and I just and I had just been nearly sober, and I said to her like, I'm just I'm just trudging through life now. Trudging is a big a word, like you know, you're trudging the road to a happy destiny. And she she leaned into me and she said, are you sober? And because the breakfast weren' drinking and I'm like, yeah, she just so am I How can I help you?

She from that one word, if I didn't say it, she stepped me up in these small cities like Omaha, Minneapolis and the b cities for me to go do my luxury trunk shows, which I do now and put me back on my path to like for my comeback, my aventu will comeback. So the great this thing was I did my I've Been a fifteen city book tour from my book covered the comeback, and I met her where she lives down in Tennessee, and she she and I reconnected that for all these years.

Speaker 3

So I love that.

Speaker 2

I think that's and that's kind of where you took an opportunity and then from there, you know, just in having conversation and meeting other people. I think that's I always love how life works like that because I always think you're meeting someone for a reason, You're doing certain things for a reason, and whether it leads you longer on your journey or destination, or you know, it kind

of guides you in a different way. I always think there's a purpose for why we're connected and why we do certain things.

Speaker 4

I agree.

Speaker 1

Do you think if you're not sober at that point the opportunity presents yourself or.

Speaker 4

Not, Oh, I wouldn't be alive. I don't.

Speaker 5

I was down the path of like, you know, my path was, you know, I'll do coke and I'll hey, I'll ask a matter all onto it.

Speaker 4

Like I was, like I was just in a self destructive mode.

Speaker 5

And I think I know for sure that if I was not, if I'm not sober, like I couldn't have done all this because there's a lot of there's a lot of pressure even this morning before with you guys, like I'm in the business meeting. I'm like, oh my god, this is happening. So I don't think I can I

you know, there's two types of sobriety. Obviously there's the drinking and drugging, which I don't really you know, miss, but It's all about your emotional sobriety and like how you treat people and how you treat others and how when a stressful situation comes up. I talk a lot in about the book about staying in solution. Like my team has gone from me to now I have like eighty people working for me, and like there's there's a

lot we're in retail. Things move fast, a lot of problems have to be solved, and like, guys, just let's think about solution, Like don't worry about what the eventual outcome is.

Speaker 4

I talk about not future yourself.

Speaker 5

So if you live in the future too much about like what if what's going to happen, you're gonna fit yourself.

So I just talk about like staying in, you know, in the present to have you know, a solution happen, right and so and so that's like been my guiding force in terms of like how I live life, and so that I learned that because I'm sober and I don't think about I think if I wasn't living more as I am, living more emotionally emotionally sober, I wouldn't be able to like deal with, like with being thrown at me on a daily basis because you know, listen,

I'm you know, as you guys are, I'm responsible for a lot of people's like happiness during the day. They tune in, they want a piece of me, I give

it to them. You know, we were shopping, but they're also like wondering, like how my day was, and so I've got to like, you know, turn it on, you know, and and uh and then realize that some people you know, maybe watching me who are like not feeling well, and I'm their only only connection because like that's for me, you know, connection is the most important thing we can do as humans, and for somebody who's I'm you know, despite me kind of talking a lot, I'm a loner

and so uh so I'm taking contrary action every day to kind of.

Speaker 4

Like have that connection happen.

Speaker 2

In your book, you know, obviously it's about the come like having a comeback. What are your tips for people like, for for example, I'll just take mine, like I would love to get back on you know, a TV show, and I want to have that kind of comeback, but it's not coming at the time that I want it to. You know. It's from my husband. He wants the head coaching. It's not coming in the time that he is wanting

it to be, like right now in the present. So how do you what are some tips for for that where it's it's the waiting period, you're speaking it, you're saying it, you're doing everything to get there, but it's not in the time that you want it to be.

Speaker 5

Well, I always go back those like there's your plan, and there's the universe univers's plan and so, and your plan is being laughed at by the universe because I just about like what what is going on? Because you know, there's there's always these things like I was late to the airport. Thank god I was because I would have been in that car crash because I didn't know what's happened. So I feel like those things are happening at all times.

And when I was at my lowest point where I literally was like do I have to move back to Michigan, Like it's like, I mean, you know, I love Michigan, but like I can't I can't live there anymore. Like you know, listen, we're it's you know, I'm very excited from beefing there, but I couldn't move back.

Speaker 2

Now it's just like no, I hear there's a piece of Like when I moved out to Los Angeles when I was nineteen, there was a piece of I can never go back. I love Michigan, I love going to visit. It's still my favorite place. But to go back feels like a failure. It feels like that I failed my dreams and now I'm coming back to Michigan.

Speaker 3

And it's like, you know, is it over?

Speaker 4

It is my story over?

Speaker 5

Because I think we're all trying to tell a story. So I'll get back to your question. So I think even with you, like I was, people like, oh, get go conquer Hollywood. Christo's then and for me to like to go back and go like, well it beat me to Polp. I'm back and now I'm working at where

I'm working at. But I think that, like, you know, so what you want to do is like just as you are doing, take that first step, like you're out here obviously and and someone's gonna it's gonna, you know, recognize you like or or or obviously recognize you, but like see what you're.

Speaker 4

Trying to do. And then that moved something.

Speaker 5

But when I was really at my lowest point, I'd had these dreams where I was in a forest and these trees were falling all over me.

Speaker 4

They're just falling, and.

Speaker 5

I was like the first time I had I was like, oh god, that was the worst dream like this. Those trees almost hit me when I was walking through it, you know, and and and I just I don't want to have that dream again. Then I had it again, and I realized in that dream, like there was a path being made for me. I thought I saw a path through this forest that I didn't know where I was going, but I kept walking that path and and

it was very visceral to me. And I feel like that's that's the moment, like whether it being like listen, I've had I've made luckily, I'm really happily married now, but I made you know, my second marriage was a disaster and like you know, took me down like this whole thing. And there's no no offense to him, but it was more, you know, it was both a two things. But I think that, like I, you know, what you

got to do is trust youre gout. I've been in relationships like that, with relationship my entire life, and each one was worse every time I got into it. And I didn't learn my lesson, So I don't think until you finally learn your lesson about like where you need to be or what's like not right for you, because this isn't life about like figuring out like what's not

right for you. I feel like life, you know, you kind of know that's not good for me, that I know is not good for me, Like that's good for me. So I think for me, it was about what I'm doing now with covered by Crystos is like everything I've learned, good and bad in my entire life has led me to this point. So I think that's the same thing about one's own personal story. Like you know, you may not be getting what you're getting right now, but you're getting it and you're getting another way.

Speaker 4

Maybe you're healthy, like you know, and that's what you need to be right now.

Speaker 3

Right, Yeah, no, I hear you.

Speaker 2

Where it's about focusing on it will come and the greater plan is is already being work done and we don't know.

Speaker 4

Yeah you know, and that's the.

Speaker 5

Excitement about it. So it's gonna it's gonna happen to you. So I talk to people like I've been doing. I've seen thousands of folks on my book touring, Like some of them are like in their early twenties and like our mid twenties. They just got laid off my job, and like they're really fearful about the future. And you know, I there are people like always kind of say these things like, oh, it's going to be okay, it will be okay.

Speaker 4

So what I said to that was like, no, it is okay.

Speaker 5

Where where you are right now is okay where you should be, and just let just don't sit back and like go like, oh, please, someone save my life. Like you don't do some things that you know you may not think is is comfortable. Like I always tell people if you're if you're like worrying about yourself too much or feeling a little bit too egoistic egotistical, like just call somebody up and talk to them and just ask them about their life and get out of your own head.

Speaker 3

Yeah your way. Well that's that's the thing.

Speaker 2

Like whenever I have a tough you know I'm going through something tough, I remember I do this sometimes where I'm at therapy, there's a there's a prayer wall, and I will look at other people's prayers and I'm like man, like I like, I don't have someone dying from cancer or I am not struggling from this or that, and it's like you can kind of put things into perspective too, and taking yourself outside of your own struggles to go there are other people around you struggling, and then how

can I how can I help? And you know, whenever I get to the place my therapist, I was like, go surf, go do something that you know puts you out of your own Oh poor me. Kind of not that our problems aren't valid, it's just there are so many people out there that are going through, you know, things that are that are really hard, and it kind of opens your eyes to things.

Speaker 4

Yeah, one of my and I totally and I had this.

Speaker 5

You know, it's kind of a spiritual box I have, and like every year I'll put in like my biggest fears in the box to kind of let them go, you know what I mean, or like I will look at them and like it's funny, like I and when you look at it a year afterwards, the things you were worried about a year are like, oh, yeah, you.

Speaker 4

Kidding me, That's why I was worried about year ago.

Speaker 5

And so my dad died in my you know, he you know, was fifty nine when he dies, so he was very young, and like, you know, it was fire for our whole family, and like he died penniless. I was like supporting my family at age twenty, and you know, it was It's always been a part of like my being like am I gonna end alo with my dad? Will I be penans at the end? And like am

I gonna? Because I'm a lot like him? And so you know, in that fear and that sort of box, I put things like, you know, I'm afraid I'm gonna be broke, you know once and I look at it every year. I'm like, really, Cristos, like you know, so that you know, it almost happened to me because I wasn't really being I wasn't being really mindful about my life.

Speaker 4

I had been out of control and so you know that's what that's what I like to do.

Speaker 1

So yeah, amazing. So what's the when people read your book? If you got to tell them just one thing to take from the book, Yeah, what would you tell them?

Speaker 5

I would say, life gets lifey and you got to figure out what when these situations pop up, you know, what to potentially do when it happens, and some of it is like do nothing until to like really think about it, so that I mean like I would just say life gets lifely and just have a little bit of a laugh. Because the book is funny, I find I think, I hope so and it's kind of like, you know, if there's some people like, you know, the

whole Hollywood interest in your story blah blah blah. The book is kind of like my big frat, my big fat Greek wedding meets less than zero, you know, because there's a lot of drama on Greek, you know, so I feel like dramatic moments. There is one of me. The most dramatic moment of the book is I was in my second marriage and the throes of my addiction, and my husband was starting to leave our you know, as literally, you guys, this is such a hollowey thing.

I was living at the top of the holland looking at all of la like literally the top in my huge home, you know, hookers and strippers and coke, and I mean literally that the stupidest thing of all time. We have a huge fight and he wants to he you know, wants to leave, and so you know, in typical Greek fashion, I throw myself this way on the driveway with my body and he has the car like revving it to run over me to basically like because I'm saying him, just kill me, because I can't deal

with this anymore. And I can tell this as a joke. That's a joke now as a funny story. And I remember like he was revving it like this is the end. I'm finally can be released from all the pain I'm feeling.

Speaker 4

And he didn't do it.

Speaker 5

And so when we're doing this movie, thing is I'm actually you'll see this in a drone and you'll see me look right in the camera and be like you're probably wondering how I got here. And so the whole story is back is like that whole story of like starting I was a four year old kid in Detroit, but like, you know, realizing that you can come back from even that moment where you want you want a car to run you over, Yeah, make that happen.

Speaker 3

So oh, I love a good old Michigan comeback story.

Speaker 1

You know.

Speaker 4

I just like, I mean, how proud of you? Got a ross on the met gallic carpet making that happen.

Speaker 3

Yeah, I mean, and I love it.

Speaker 2

I mean I think about, you know, my moment being in the bushes, I'm like, how did I get here in the bushes, you know, hiding from a from this person? You know. So it's it's we all have a come back. We all have come back story.

Speaker 5

I think we were from Detroit because Detroita we have great We think about it like it was that you know back in Detroit. Ell you may not know, like back in when you're your young Jedi, but like back in the eighties, you didn't stop for a red light in Detroit if you were downtown the city, you didn't stop. You had to roll through it, so you wouldn't get like, you know, mug you know, in your car. And so now it's huge, like you know, it's I love going back there so much.

Speaker 4

It's so great.

Speaker 5

And I think, and I talk about in the book, like I you know, my comeback, my first trunk show after I was kind of getting back to my feet, wasn't Detroit at the Foundation Hotel, And so that city has been linked to like my sort of like reblossoming as a person, as a business.

Speaker 3

So yeah, yeah, I love that. Well, I love that you still have loved for Michigan.

Speaker 2

I always get sad when people leave and saying bad things about it, like Madonna.

Speaker 4

Like, I'm sure she's gone back a lot.

Speaker 5

I mean, listen, that's my girl. You know my my first gay bar was her first gay bar in Michigan's. You ever go to Menjo's.

Speaker 4

No, Oh, you were good. You're a good Westside girl. That's fine.

Speaker 3

I just didn't go out.

Speaker 4

But she something there near you actually, you know that right?

Speaker 2

Well, Madonna went to my high school. But then she said that she said some bad things about Rochester and I was like, oh, like it hurt my heart, hurt my Michigan heart. But maybe, you know, maybe they caught her the interview, caught her on a bad day. I don't know, but it's all good. Uh all right, well, thank you so much for coming on. Everyone, go get covet the comeback. Thank you so so so much.

Speaker 4

All right, great, thank you guys, thank you guys.

Speaker 1

Ever, thank you, thank you.

Speaker 4

Pleasure.

Speaker 1

Bye bye bye

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