WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER CHEATING?

Matt, you are looking absolutely glowing today. What's your secret?

Well, Anna, I've been using this new hydrating tanning myss called Goldy B with two e's.

I have to check it out. I've never heard of it.

Go to their instagram.

I want the fairy tale. I want the prince charming she How.

Do I put?

This?

Isn't a fan of my kissing.

Style boyfriend and girlfriend for about twelve hours.

He's in a trash bit. He's non recyclable. Catching him mu.

I love being love.

I love love. I knew you were going to think you were secure. You're so not secure.

Where's Your Head At is a podcast that talks all things relationships, breakups, reality TV, trending shows, and everything in between.

This is your new go to destination for laughs, gossip, intimate details, advice, and much more. Good morning, Anna.

Hello, the sun is shining. I'm feeling good. How are you?

I'm good. I'm feeling good as well. Actually you know what I'm not. That's let's start off with my ick turnoff.

Oh week, cat straight into it.

I am so My turn off is a couple of weeks ago. I played flag football NFL flag football. You know how much I love American football.

You do, absolutely froth it.

Love it. Got invited to play flag, which is a how do you put it? It's a variation of NFL. So it's all the same except you can't tackle. Yeah, so you got to pull the flags off people. That's technically the.

Tackle, right, it's like a bit more like you know.

Kid friendly, say yeah, say that did not stop me from being so fucking sore. I have never felt so sore in my life, my lower back.

So it's just not as fit as you used to be. That's the thing.

Well, that is my that's my ick, is that we are getting old. I'm now twenty nine, am I? No, I'm twenty eight. Sorry you're acting I'm twenty eight. Your what are you know? Thirty one? Thirty one?

Thirty one and having some fun?

Well, everyone listenings like they're not old. They're not old, or you might be listening going geez, that's old.

You know what's funny and interesting is I remember when I was in my modeling days and I think I was about twenty four and there was a girl who I knew was older, and I remember saying, how old are you? And she said to me, I'm thirty one, and I remember thinking, geez, she's getting on. And I remember actually saying to her, which is so offensive now as a thirty one year old for people to say to me.

I went, oh, but you look so good for thirty one.

I literally said that to her, and so.

I've got secondhand embarrassment.

Someone has actually recently, a younger influencer actually said to me, I can't believe you're thirty one.

You look so young. And I was like, but I am young at heart.

I used to work with the gard when I was on the tools and I was twenty four and he was thirty. Yeah, and I used to or six years difference, so I was twenty two. He was my age twenty eight and I should be like, you are fucking old. And I was like, oh, I'll never get that old, and here I am, but yet you do get you do it. And here I am fucking old and I'm feeling it.

But do you know what, we're actually as young as will ever be. And that's every time I think of myself. Like I said to Michael the other day, I was like, do you know we're middle aged? Like we're middle aged aged couple. But then I was like, no, but I'm as young as I'll ever be, So I think in my mind, I'll always think of myself as young, because in this very moment that we're in right now, we're all as young as we're ever going to be, and it's only getting worse.

I thought, I still think I'm young. I mean, before the game, people were doing stretches and warming up, and I was like, I've never stretched in my life. A minute, they're like stretching, so they're all stretching and I've pulled up so sore, and I like, I said, it's surprising that I pulled up saw from a game which is no tackling.

Matt's like not stretching and he's seeming to be stretched off.

Lily right, that was a good one. That's literally what happened. But don't get me wrong, the game was fun. I had an amazing time. Tammy came to watch me. I appreciate it so much.

Okay, do you know what's really cute is that she wore the Zukowski top.

That's such a vibe. Yeah, I was like, that's very cute. On like, for both of.

You wearing that, that was very It turned me on a bit I love that.

Like, if Michael had a Staples top, I would love to wear a Staples top.

He just doesn't, he doesn't have ones.

That was an absolute vibe her wearing that. I found that very hot.

Yeah, that is hot. That's very cute.

My ech of the week is that, I mean, I'm going to give you guys, guys a little bit of honesty. At the moment, I've had some issues with one of my friends. We've been disagreeing on some things, and it's just been really hard.

And I think, like you.

Know, as you said, we are older. It's something that doesn't happen often, so it's really taken a mental toll on me. I've been really upset about it four months actually, and yeah, it's just really hard. And I know that a lot of people on our Facebook page have asked us to talk about going through a friendship breakup and like, yeah, I don't know where things stand with us at the moment, but yeah.

It's been really challenging. So that's my ech of the week.

Just you know, it's pretty rough what you're going through. I couldn't imagine going through it. Yeah, I just think that, like it's yeah, I've seen how rough it's been for you and how much of a toll it's taken on you.

Yeah, Like Michael has said to me that the most stressed out he's seen me throughout our whole relationship is to do with that situation constantly, Like it's like a reoccurring thing. So not me when I'm being difficult, I mean you and You're being difficult is difficult. But I do feel like it doesn't last that long when we have disagreements, Like we are quick to resolve things, and I think that's due to the fact that, like we

It's probably the most. Yeah, it's stressful and difficult.

It's been challenging, and it's definitely being dragged out like you said.

For years, I mean essentially it's come to a peak, yeah, over the last four months. Yeah, So anyway, I'm not going to go into detail out of respect, but you know, it's it's definitely something that I that's been kind of weighing me down recently, and yeah, I just somehow pray that it can get resolved. I don't know how, but yeah, it's just hard. It's hard anyway. I'm feeling a little bit deflated now, so I'm gonna go over to you to light the mood.

What's your turn on of the week?

My turn on for the week is, actually you guys might be thinking it's just so obvious. Baths.

Baths.

Yeah, baths.

Oh, having a bar. Oh I love a ba.

So I was never really big on baths. I'm six foot five, six foot six.

Trying to find a bath that you get along with?

Yeah, literally, But Tammy and myself, I mean, we stayed in a lot of hotels for a bit over the start of our relationship, and we would always well not always, but we've had a bath in one of them, and I started running the bath and I was like, let's have a bath tonight. She was a bit like, I'm a ring. End up hopping in the bath. Had the best time ever when going to details so good. And

Well, speaking of Tammy, I actually saw on a post the other day that you guys are now saying the album and I just kind of want to take it back a little bit because I didn't know.

I'm and I know.

That you guys are deeply in love with each other, but I kind of want to know the first time you said I love you to each other.

So the first time I said I love you too Tammy was actually she was in Melbourne. We're actually about to meet my family, so we're about to meet my mum, my two sisters, and she was getting a little bit nervous to meet them, as you do, like I was nervous to meet her family. And We're sitting on the couch in the hotel room and I just said, hey, look like I love you. It's going to be fine, and I want you to meet my family. And then she said it back, she said I love you too.

That's really sweet. So you were like reassuring, reassuring.

I said, I love you, and I couldn't. I can't wait for you to meet them, and they're going to love you as well as much as I do.

When did you realize that you love her.

I never really believed in love at first sight. Like I always thought, yeah, that's that's not real, Like you know, that doesn't happen. But I'm not going to lie. The first time I met Tammy, when she walked up to me, I got like I'm not gonna lie. I got very like butterflies in my stomach and got like real nervous.

And really, you don't get nervous, I don't do. You don't get nervous like we sometimes like we have like these big interviews and we do all of this crazy stuff and like there could be like thousands of people and you just.

Don't get nervous. Yeah, I got big butterflies. I don't know. I don't know. It's like she was just walking up and then like we were in the elevator together going up to the hotel room, and I just remember like she was just standing there. She kept staring at me, and I kept looking at her, and I was like, I wouldn't say love, but looking back, it was a very strong feeling of like lust and emotion towards someone.

I remember you said to me, I don't know if I'm ever gonna date anyone who gets me because I'm hard work. And then you met Tabby and you were like, she gets me, and you were like, shocks.

Yeah, it's just it's so easy. And it's more that like even when she doesn't get stuff or I don't get stuff about her, it's just so healthy and respectful in the way we try and understand each other and navigate the situation. Yeah, Like there's no toxic like stuff, Like I'll literally give her like tips for the next time and she takes them on board and vice versa, how to handle situations and how to like you know, get the best from each other.

That's what you want though, right, Like you want to be able to take on a little bit of feedback or to be able to take it without feeling attacked, Like Michael gives me feedback and I'm like, Okay, I'll do it. I'll do that next time, And it's so healthy.

Do you believe like I think that like people say it should be it's easy, I don't think it's ever going to be easy. Two people are different. I've always said that two people are different. Like for it to be easy, I feel like somebody has to be very submissive or very just fucking chilled. Well, yeah, two people have to be very chilled. Tammy and I aren't two very chilled people, but we're two people that respect each other. Yeah, I want to get the best from the relationship.

It's all about respect.

Like I've had times when I've been in relationships, and I can openly admit with ex boyfriends, I just didn't respect them. So I was willing to, you know, say things that probably were hurtful, and I wasn't like coming at them with the most tact in respect. I wasn't trying to get the best out of the situation because I didn't care as much. Whereas like I would never say anything to Michael. I mean even if I did, I would immediately like want to apologize and men things.

I think, yeah, I think we've I've said to her that, like, just let's just keep respecting each other and this will be cruisy. I reckon love his patient, love his kind and love is about respect and that's what we have, those three things.

Yeah, that's cute. Okay, well my turn on of the week. Yes is the fact. And this happened a few weeks ago.

But Coldplayer coming to Melbourne, and you know how big of a fan I am of Chris Mantin. He is my celebrity hall pass crush, whatever you want to call it.

And I photo of him and I didn't get it. I don't get it.

I think it's just like the British and he's like, you know, like an older attractive guy.

I don't mind the songs. He's like, I really like cold Play. I'm probably gonna listen to him on the way home now after this.

Maybe we should get tickets, yeah, to the concert. Maybe we should do a Double Day that could be cute. I just think like his music is incredible, He's amazing, and like, I.

Am dying to go.

So they initially when they came to Australia, they only went to Perth, but now there's it's available from Melbourne, so I'm like excited.

We don't do what you did with this Taylor Swift and not clue me in. And now I'm not going to fucking Taylor Swift. If I'm spewing about Travis might be there fucking fanboy over him.

I've never heard you talk about Travis before in my life, and now you fucking love.

Him because you don't listen to me When I do talk to you about NFL. It's in one ear out the other. You wouldn't even know if I was.

This is true, but I've never heard you talking about Travis Kelcey. Is that his last name, Travis Kelsey?

Yeah.

Anyway, on celebrity crushes, let's get into that. So and I saw this TikTok the other day, you know, me laying TikTok scrolling, it's all I do. And it was about people who have celebrity crushes or huge fans of celebrities are actually a happier people.

Really.

I don't know why.

Maybe because they're putting them on a pedestal and they're getting a lot of joy and happiness from them. I mean, I have a friend Maddie who is obsessed with Shawn Mendees, like to an unhealthy level, and she would she would even admit.

That, like she is obsessed.

I think when her Spotify rap for the Year came in, she was like the top one percent of people who listened to Shawn Mendes. Yeah, she was like proud of it. She was like, fuck yeah, like I've you know, I'm like.

One of the number one fans.

What's one of these songs?

I can't write one song that's sort of value, you know.

That song not resonating with you?

Well, Matt, you actually sent me this video and doctor Nikola Thomas says that it actually acts as a reprieve from life stresses. So if you've got like a really stressful life, then you can turn to your celebrity crush or your idol maybe listen to their music and it kind of like takes.

The weight off. Is that surprising to you? Yeah, I can see how it works.

What do you mean, like you're dissociating from what you're doing sort of thing, and you're.

Like, well, maybe you're like living in the reality of the celebrity as opposed to your real life, which could be like difficult or.

Stressful or yeah, I'm but wouldn't that be the same as like, you know, like I used to do that with wrestling.

Yeah, like getting involved in a hobby. Absolutely, it's like a distraction.

Or watching it. So that would be like my outlet. So I'd be obsessed with wrestling and wrestlers and wrestlers.

Yeah, So that's definitely exactly like that, exactly like.

That, and that would dissociate me from my reality and I'd be focused on that.

My celebrity crush used to be Heath Ledger. I was like a die hard Heath Ledger fan, and when he died, I was super upset. But I used to love watching Ten Things I Hate About You. Have watched it hundreds of times, I reckon, and it's always like so stress free and light and fun and like, you know, I just love that movie.

I watched that movie and the girl was like, it's such a red flag because I'm laughing at all the jokes by that the bad guy in there, the villain.

No, what was that that?

Because you know, I like, I loved the guy who's like that must be No with the bree or she had like his face face things and they're like, that's such a red flag that you find him funny and none of the rest of it funny.

I like that movie Ten Things I Hate About You is a classic and there are some classic lines like that's Niger with the bree is a classic line. I hate about you.

It's good, It's really good. Okay, say one last time for everyone, Well.

That must be Niger with the bree. Anna.

You think you know me, I do know you quite well.

Well, we're going to put that to the test. Our producer Amber has written a bunch of questions that we're going to ask each other. We've got a pen and paper. We're going to write him down so there's no cheating, and we're going to see if we get the right answers about each other.

You guys can play along as well and see if you guys know as well. I feel like I know you well, but I feel like random questions like you know, what's your favorite color? I might not know the answer to. I mean mine's is an obvious one. So will at me like you're disappointed already.

I'm feeling the pressure.

Speed Rice.

Okay, so we both have a piece of pen and paper. Let's just do me and then you. So okay, So Matt, the first question is what is my favorite color? Write it down and see if they both match.

Three.

Now, my writing looks like a.

That's okay, six year old that is so insecure about his handwriting.

I think your handwriting is not.

Me uploaded a note I wrote the other day and there was a bunch of people saying it looked like Posey wrote it.

You have my handwriting?

All right? So your favorite color is pink?

Yes, that's so easy though, Okay my favorite color?

Okay, I'm trying to cheat.

I feel like, oh my god, I'm gonna get this wrong.

Okay ready three? Two, red, black, and gold. You have to be serious.

That is my favorite color. Had people tell me I'm immature for that, but it's Essendon winning the Grand Final. I've had it since I was like five years old.

Are you serious? Right now?

You can't have three favorite color? What is your favorite color? I you had to pick one blue, black, gold, black or gold. I knew you're gonna say black, as I said, black doesn't count. I get half a point for that, okay. Okay, so it's one and one point to you and half a point to me. Okay, if you were stuck on a desert island, what is your number one item that you would bring?

This is yours. Don't look, I'm not looking. I've very written it.

Three two one, So that's the point.

So that's the point to me. Okay, what would I bring?

I don't know what you'd bring? What would you bring?

I've written two things.

You can't keep writing too.

So you have a double the chance of getting a point. Okay, fine, three?

So what would you bring to a desert island? Three two one? Tammy? You don't switch out tabby for a boat.

I said, or a boat? Yeah, so I can get off there, So you got so I.

Got that right, Poor Michael, if you didn't even can I mention?

I don't even think of Michael.

I'm like, as long as I'm looking glowing, it doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter if someone will come rescuing. Okay, so we're going to do Anna. What is your favorite sex position?

Okay? So ah, it sounds so boring.

One doggie.

Like hot missionary?

You know what I mean?

Like, Yeah, sounds boring to say that your favorite sex position is missionary.

Wine's missionary.

Well, I was going to say doggie for you, so that means we were going to mine is missionary. So we both thought each other's was doggy, but it's.

Don't get me wrong, doggie is fun.

Last one, what is our attachment styles? So let's start with me. Three two, one anxious.

And now my attachment style.

Okay, one anxious.

I knew you were going to think you were secure.

You're so not secure.

I am secure my attachment style.

Okay, that was a little bit of fun.

Guys, we hope you like that.

I hope you let us know if you've got if you guessed any of ours the same, all right, Anna. A big trend on TikTok at the moment is cheating or not cheating.

I know it's interesting, right because everyone has different boundaries, but I do think that there are some that are just obvious.

I agree. I think I think that if you do have something that is something that you feel is cheating to you set that boundary early so your partner doesn't cross it.

Okay, We're going to go through some of the main ones that we've found that have caused some disagreement. The first one is is it cheating to keep your dating app and swipe through them when you're bored, but not message anyone cheating?

Cheating?

It's cheating. How about my dumb mask when I deleted my dating app, but I signed up to the premium, which I don't know why. I don't fucking use dating apps. I just wanted all the benefits and I deleted the app. I didn't cancel my account, so I kept charging me every month. That's tough, and I didn't know what it was coming into my bank account for months, and I was like, what is this?

That's so bad?

And then I went to subscriptions on your phone. So anyone go to subscriptions on your phone because you might have paid for an app or done a free trial and just keeps charging you.

That's a good little tip there. I did that the other day.

I was actually I had class Pass and because I I was sick in hospital, I tried to cancel it. And I literally tried to cancel this app three times and they would not let me cancel it. It was so annoying. There's like every time you cancel it, they're like, but we'll give you ten percent off if you don't cancel. And then I was like, no, I still want to cancel it, and they're like fifteen percent and I was like, let me cancel fifty.

Yeah. So you just go to type and subscriptions into settings and then you go down and I just canceled them all I was paying for random stuff apps I didn't even know I had on my phone anymore.

Wild.

Okay, is it casually flirting with the cute barrista cheating map?

Yes, I'm gonna say yes.

I mean, it's not cheating, but like.

Oh, but that's the thing, that's that's where the discrepancy lies.

It either is or it is.

We shouldn't be talking to any one of the other sex, I say.

I would say, you can talk to people of the opposite sex, but you can't flirt with flirting with the barista cheating?

Yes. The next one is is it cheating if you share a bed with someone else and you don't do anything sexual?

Yes, yes, that's just a flat Yes. Why would you share a bed with someone who's not your partner?

Yeah?

Hundred percent it's just it's unusual.

That's cheating.

Is hanging out with your ex without telling your partner cheating? Yes, I think yes, that's cheating.

I think if you if you somehow like need to or want to, at a bare minimum, the partner needs to know.

You need to know. Yeah, And if you're not telling him, you're obviously hiding something.

Yeah, or you just can't be bothered with the argument. But either way they need to know.

They need to know.

Yeah.

I mean, maybe just don't hang out with.

Your Yeah, probably probably the easiest to say. Or if you bump into them or something like you just tell your partner, you have to tell yeah, hey, I bumped into an a set of load.

Honesty is the best policy. Like there's literally nothing that happens in my life. There's no guy that texts me where I don't tell Michael one d the same. Like literally, even if it's like an X from like six years ago or something, I'll just Okay, by the way this person message.

Me, I think that's that I.

Did reply, I didn't reply. Whatever it is.

I think that's the best, and it just the rest of the relationship, Like, you know, keep that standard because as soon as you start hiding things, are keeping things from your partner. It's downhill from there.

And it's also like on your conscience.

I think, like we don't realize the impact that things have on us, and it like really weighs you down as well.

Like to just be in a.

Relationship where there's a clear, clean conscience, it's really like it's nice. You don't want to like have things where you're like, oh my god, if they find out about this, they could break up with me. And then because then you feel unsettled in.

Your own life.

Then you get anxious.

Anxiety the killer of happiness.

And a big one is watching porn cheating. No, No, I don't think so.

I think absolutely not.

I think it's healthy, like everything in moderation, right, Like if you're watching porn and like obsessed with porn and addict you to it, that's a different story. Or if you're like not having actual real life sex because you're too busy watching porn, that could be a problem.

That's I understand.

Like there are people who I know who are like very against porn. Yeah, And like we've spoken to a couple who were big on like porn being a boundary in their relationship before on the podcast, remember Sam and Hayley. But for me personally, I don't see it as like like it's just looking.

There's a screen there.

I get that what they were saying was like porn is like an exchange of energy, but for me, it's more just like a switch off, like you can just switch off without having to like imagine up a horny s.

Yeah. I don't think it's cheating. I think that it's fair play on Like I wouldn't get upset if my girlfriend was.

Watching porn, no hot, let me know about it, just.

Yeah, get me involved. I'll watch it with you. Is it cheating to tell someone that you would totally hook up with them if you were single?

Oh yes absolutely. You can't put like DIBs on people. And if you're single, then you're like planning on not being in a relationship, so probably just don't be in a relation.

Dialogue. I don't like that. I don't like dialogue like if we would break up or like if I were single. I hate that.

Because then it's also like if you did become single, then that person's like, oh now now my chance has come up, Like they're like waiting for you to almost break up like nap.

Right, Let's let's take a back a step telling when you're in a relationship with someone and telling them that you think someone's attractive.

I just don't really see the need.

Yeah, same, Like I think that you can visually look at someone and be like, you're attractive?

Why it?

Like, what is what is it within you that makes you need to tell your partner that because it could potentially make them feel insecure. And then on top of that, like, if you're going to say that someone else is attractive, you need to be okay with them saying it back to you, big one.

And I think that's where, you know.

Like I could say to Michael, like, I don't think I would say to Michael, like that guy's really attractive.

I don't say that single or not.

I don't know how I was single, I might say it, yeah, I would say to my to my friends like that guy's hot. Yeah.

I don't know.

But like if I'm in a relationship, If I am in a relationship, I wouldn't say he's hot.

No, no, no, I don't just me. I never have never will.

I would always say to Michael, he's like the only guy I find attractive anyway, like, no one, no one turns my head.

There's no guy that could walk past me.

If I put a bomb into the villa with your head turn. What's that there was a bomb in the villa? Your head turn?

Nah? Like, once I'm in, I'm in.

I'm very loyal, Like I'm like blinkers on like you are, where my attention is focused out, like even like in a jonnice looking like long haired, like sexy like everything.

That's my type of guy.

If he walked past me, I would just be like, cool, I've already got what I'm looking for, Like I'm content, my needs it met, I'm happy.

That's cute.

Yeah, And I think you're the same.

I'm the same undred percent look at other people like this, would I look at anyone else?

Well, exactly, Like You're like I've got the hottest girl on the planet, and I'm like I've got the hottest guy ever.

So no point looking anywhere.

We're all good over here.

Okay. So I've got some red flag green flags for you today, Anna, which actually this first one is hilarious because it ties in so well. When they have the handwriting that's similar to a child. I literally just prefaced before I wrote Tammy a letter when I was leaving early in the morning, and she put it on her story and there was a lot of replies, apparently saying it looks like one of her child's one of the sorry one of her children wrote it, Well, I think.

That's a green flag because I think it's endearing. And I think if you have a guy who's going out of their way to write you a letter, taking pen to paper, that is one hundred percent of green flag. So it doesn't really matter, like I don't need like, you know, letters joined type of like hands written letter. I think the meaning is the thought behind it.

I'm pretty sure my dad, when I gave him his card a couple of months ago for his birthday or Father's Day whatever, said you need to work on your handwriting, Like what about card mate?

Like what about all my nice words in the heart? Yeah?

I think I think write a letter is from the heart, So I think it's a green flag.

I agree.

Okay, what about when a boy lights candles when you come over.

I just relate that to such a fuck boy move.

I think it's a green flag.

It's a green flag.

Yeah, sopt the mood.

Yeah, I used to do that back in the heyday when I was like eighteen ninety.

Really yeah, but you know what.

Like salts a caramel glass house.

There's a thing about like it's really setting a mood and ambiance, like can really like make the sex amazing.

So I think I agree.

I would imagine like walking in and they've like a bunch of candles that would be sucking.

Hot, like there's a warm bath run.

Or hot rose petals.

Music, like really nice romantic hot music playing in the background.

Nice, like that's hot.

Even just like saying it, like I'm like, oh, maybe I'll do that for Michael.

Maybe Michael's getting lucky. No, but it's nice.

And I think a lot of the time when we have sex, like everyone has lives us such a busy life, right, and we don't have time to really like plan and it's kind of like quick hot sex and it's like in the moment and in the moment sex is so good, but something sometimes there's nothing better than a little pre planning of setting the tone.

I do like romantic sex, but don't get me wrong, I love just quicky hot eyes. Okay, when they text and drive with you in.

The car red flag, Well, who.

Else do you need to be fucking texting I'm sitting right here.

But also the main point, don't text and drive.

It's dangerous, like so many there's so many everything's happening on our roads. I know it's not smoking about enough and so many dangerous situations and if you're not paying full attention, like yeah, just don't do it.

Put your phone away.

I agree, don't need to text and drive. Are you a passenger princess? Anna?

You know what? I do?

Love being a passenger princess. It's nice having someone drive you around.

It's hot.

I do love driving as well. Yeah, being me and driving the car.

Yeah, it's hammy a passenger princess.

Passenger princess.

Okay, guys, that's all we have time for.

As always, give us a five star review if you're enjoying this style of podcast, and we want to hear from you on our Facebook page, so make sure you hit us up there and until next time, seeya bye