“We Owned a House Together and He Ghosted Me!” || HOTLINE

Hey, Matt, Hello Anna, how are.

We I'm excited.

This is a new segment, a new episode that we're trialing out, So we want all the feedback on this one.

This is our Hotline episode.

I'm very excited to get into this. We've been talking about this for ages. Obviously, we have heaps of people message the show, thank you, our Instagram at Facebook page. They send us how do we put it? Stories, questions and obviously we can't answer them all because we have to do topical ones every Wednesday. But we thought if we add another episode, we can hit more people and help more people.

Yeah, so you guys can now send us voicemails and they will come through to our Hotline producer Alex. She's going to find the best stories and you guys can be a part of this podcast. We love having you guys a part of it, and we know you guys have some saucy and spicy stories.

So email your.

Voice notes to Where's your Head Out Pod at gmail dot calm for your chance to be a part of the Hotline episode.

We can't wait to hear them all. Hello, Hello, how are you Anna?

I'm doing well? How's your life going?

Good?

Good?

So I just had a night away with my girlfriend Jen.

Nice.

How was that? It was good? Actually really relaxing. We've stayed at Crown Lovely, had to swim this morning, so I'm still smelling a bit like chlorine.

I did smell a bit of chlorine whifting over. That's what that is.

That was nice and relaxing. You know, it was good to get away with Jen, Like it's been a year we've been together for now. Ye just like you know, like it'd be lying to say everything runs smoothly, you know, life doesn't run smooth.

No, absolutely not.

So like we've caught ourselves in a bit where like, obviously life right now is picking up. It's busy work, This is busy, life gets in the way.

Christmas is incoming.

Yeah, events are coming up every weekend, literally dinners every random night with another friend. And we just got to the point where we're like, you know what, let's have some time for ourselves and let's let's go work on this and work on each other. And we had a very good night.

Do you feel like it's kind of helped you guys to reconnect.

Yeah, So we both agreed let's just let's like, let's start taking it a day at a time, like, let's just do each day and we just you know, have a good day each day and focus on one thing that's positive about that day and continue to grow. So, yeah, I think last night we had a really good time. I know I did, and I know one hundredercent she did. So we'll just see where we go from here.

So have you guys been on the rocks a little bit?

Would you say? Wouldn't say rocks? It's just like more.

Like little bits of arguments.

Yeah, arguments and just I don't yeah, I don't want to. Like, look, I feel like we have this podcast and we have a duty to, like, you know, tell the truth about how we are and all that sort of stuff. We're not like, so we've just not it's just been how do I put it, Like I've been saying, Aye, yeah, Like it's just some stuff like this is what I say to her. We're two different people, we were raised different, we've had different life experiences, and we see things differently.

Now, how has been living together?

So?

How long have you guys been living together?

For?

Now?

Six months?

Probably six months? And how is that going?

For the better part? Good? Like, I love nothing more than going to heaven and cuddling her. Yeah, I love that, going to bed with her every night. It's the best thing ever. But it's like sort of like I love my own space as well, And I don't think you realize that till you're actually moved in with someone and you're living with them. I don't know, how do you go?

Well, it's interesting that you're saying this.

I don't know if it's like this time of year, but you know, me and Michael obviously recently got engaged. We were on like the biggest high ever, and then obviously realities keep in. We both like, I was away for eight days, so I'm kind of like backlogged. I'm trying to catch up on work and like obviously doing a lot more hours and I guess I would normally be doing. And last week we both found it really

How I'm feeling.

So yeah, So I kind of said that to him, and he's like, what do you mean we're disconnected? Like we've been so busy, Like life happens, and I was like, you know what, I know, life happens, but like we also need to make each other a priority, and like, you know, whether that's like making a night where we have a date night, because we don't really have a

Yeah.

So yeah, I think we just after the weekend, we spent a lot more quality time together and everything's like, you know, back to normal and being obsessed with each other. But yeah, I think we do need to prioritize like spending like putting a time aside each quality time to spend quality time, because you know, sometimes after work, you know, you might sit on the couch together for an hour, but it's not really quality time because you're not like talking and connecting, and you.

Know, well that's it. Like so I was talking to Jen about it, and I was like, look, when we were so busy with work and all that sort of stuff during the week that like when we get home, it's not like we're so like we'll go on a walk sometimes together all hang out, but like who do you vent to, like your partner, So we're just venting to each other about work, and it's not really like a good quality time. So like we'll vent, we'll have dinner, I'll go gym, whatever we'll do. Then we'll just lay

Together, intimate moments.

And then you get to the weekend and then there's event like at the Corefield carp there's everything, so there's not really a time where you're just in each other's like space and you holding space for each other and having a good time. So that's why we went away on the weekend. And it doesn't help Quliday time. Yeah, and it doesn't help that I leave the UK next week for three weeks, so that saga continues. The ticket finally figured out, so I'm going to the UK.

Next week, So very exciting, but also sad that you'll be not seeing Jen for three weeks.

But it could it could work in our favor though we could. You know, distance makes the heart grow fond us, so hope that should hopefully work in that way.

We've been seeing a lot on social media, actually, Hayley and Sam who have been guests on our podcast. Yeah, they like and I know Instagram is not always reality, but fuck me, they're like Instagram. They seem to just have the most connected relationship ever. They're just having hot, steamy sex, like she literally on her Instagram stories runs

I don't know regardless.

So they actually posted on Instagram saying that they had like twenty four hours of four play throughout the weekend, and I was telling Michael this and I was like, they have having better sex than us, babe, and he's like, fuck, who has.

Twenty four hours? Who has time to do twenty four hours four play? Well?

When I read twenty four hours of four play, I was like, well, what's that?

That's like, that's a I think she just means like twenty four hours of like really connect Well.

Yeah, she went on and said what they did, and I was like, that makes more sense than what I think four play is. I know that I'm not the best at four play.

What do you mean You're not the best at all?

I'm not the best at Like yeah, going through those motions of four play, it's straight to you know.

You're just down for the ded straight away. Well you know what, like it is something that.

Can really connect you. And like their fore play wasn't just like going down on each other. Their full play was like, you know, going in the bath together and drinking champagne. Apparently he kissed her body for two hours straight like all of this stuff. I'm like oh my god, like they sound like they're having a fucking great time.

One was reading poems.

I was like, that is really you know I have a poem book? Did I tell you that that Michael has for me? It's really sweet, So like any like milestone we have in our relationship, he'll like, because he's an amazing writer, yeah, he'll like write a poem about it, and it's actually really beautiful. Literally, every time he reads me a new poem that he's written, I will literally cry, like I well laugh, it's so nicely.

I've never heard that that you got a poem book. I wouldn't mind reading that.

Yeah, yeah, like it's like any like he's actually like writing one at the moment about our engagement because that's like kind of like the next milestone in our relationship that I don't have a poem for yet. Maybe I'll bring it in and.

And read it when I think if poems are I can't have to laugh, like if roses are red violence.

But then you're like a really emotional guy, So I feel like I don't know how good you are with your words, but like it could be a real like outlet for you.

I'm actually really good. Jen loves my letters that I write for on special occasions, like I'm really good at writing my cards.

Maybe that's something that you can do to try and bring up the intimacy. Maybe you should write Jenna poem. Maybe that's something you can agree to do for the pod and maybe you can come and share it with us later.

I just don't know how I go with an actual poem, like I can't. I think a poem is like Shakespeare and they're like just a bit bit.

Of a couple of writing words here and there.

Okay, so what is your weekly recommendation for our audience center?

Okay, So obviously I said to you. I was telling Michael that I was feeling a little bit disconnected. But something we have been reconnecting on a show that we've been loving at the moment is Married at First Sight UK. It's on nine now. Michael and I have become obsessed with it. And the reason why I even got onto this is because for some reason, my TikTok algorithm has like been on Maths UK and some of the scenes

So we started watching it.

I think there's like twelve or thirteen or fourteen episodes out now.

Oh, they're coming out weekly.

They're coming out still, so you know, it's very much a now show.

It's happening in the present.

And also like you can have a bit of a binge as well if you start it on like a weeknight or weekend and it's a really good one and you won't be disappointed.

There's lots going on.

It's funny you say that the other night. Jane and myself we love Naked and Afraid, right, Yeah, you guys do have love it, so we like always we always watch it. We're always like, oh, do you reckon these people hooking up? Like do you reckon? They're you know, because they're cuddling together at night, like surely surely they are. Yeah, we're like laying in bed, we're trying to find something new. We're on the foxtail app. You'll never get that's what

How do you date someone when you're fucking naked, Like you just be like looking at their bits.

Well, the first guy walks over and then the girl's like he was rock hard.

Stop it.

There's no way to hide, is there, Like I mean unless you're like putting a branch.

Well what they put their hesham sack over it, so they cover it like that, but the girl obviously will have like one hit out right. Yeah. Well my recommendation is, like obviously I said before, it's a busy time of the year. There's heaps going on and you need to schedule it all. So I've actually got you onto this, and I tell I'm gonna tell a funny story about it. Is the app TimeTree.

Oh I love a time tree.

You know what I have to say before you, like tell this story. I was very reluctant to try this, Matt. Yeah, and I'm so glad I did.

You're welcome. It's actually life changing. It's literally life change. So Jenn and I found maybe probably under a year ago, ten months ago, like there's so much going on, right, so like I'll say, oh, let's do this on this stage. She's like, no, I'm doing this, and I'll be like, well, have you told me this? And she's like, yeah, I've told you multiple times, and I'm like you forgot yeah. Yeah. So then we heard about this app called time Tree.

It's the best because you can see each other's calendars. And then Matt got me onto it, so.

This is what I'm going to say. You're on it, right, So we made a joint one where we were going to do stuff so we knew what we were doing for the podcast, right. Yeah, I never put anything in that one. You've taken that one over. So it's in my own way as it's your full calendar. So I get updated every day with Anna's what she's doing. I can't remember the other day I was having someone asked me something about you, and I was like, oh, actually, see what she's doing then, and I looked at I

That's so funny. I didn't know that.

And you know when it notifies you in the morning, so I get mine and Jen's calendar and then I get your, so you've got on for the day every day.

This is so funny.

You know the thing about time tree, So obviously you're like sharing calendars with people who you're close to, but sometimes Matt will like update my calendar and like add things in and I'm like, in a second, I don't remember adding this, but Matt's added it in for me.

That's right. The other day I added all our podcast things for you. So I'll just do it, put it straight in there.

It was really helpful though, so thank you.

That's all right.

Yeah, time Tree is great, and it's great like when you do want to be sharing calendars with people, everyone's color coded so you don't get mixed up, and you know, it's a great way.

Yeah. So that's my recommendation.

I'm going to try and get Michael onto it. That's my gu.

In the same one. So I'm going to say, what you and Michael are doing?

No, can I add him in his own one and then we'll share.

Yeah, yeah, definitely do that, but then you'll have to add them to two unless you take over that one.

Look, it's an ever growing process. Hello, you've reached Anna and Matt.

We can't get to the phone right now, but.

Please leave us a message on our hotline after the beep. Okay Matt.

Earlier this week on our Instagram and Facebook page, we asked our audience to send us their crazy ex stories. Thank you so much to everyone who wrote in. We got some insane stories right.

Mm hmm, I haven't heard any of them. Buddy, our producer Alex, who goes through and told us there's some fucking wild ones in there and to get ready buckle up. Okay, so this first one we've got comes from Steph.

Okay, this is the first time we're hearing this guy. This is our honest reaction.

So I was saying this guy for about a year, and within three months he moved in with me. Fast forward eight months. He was talking about marriage, kids, making a life together. So we decided to buy the house that we're living in. We went to the account and got all the people work, sorted all the finances in order, and I was just really unhappy and I put it down to work. So he was like, why didn't you quit your job? I will support you. You go study,

Oh my god, did did he die?

That's wild?

I mean when I first started hearing that story, I was thinking, this is like me and that to a t, Like things are moving quick.

He's moving into.

Three months, like they're looking at finances eight months in to buy the house. But why go to that much effort and then ghost like that?

I was, Yeah, I was like, this guy's moving quickly. He sounds like he's caene Like this scene isn't being Yeah, this is cute, Like this sounds This doesn't sound like a horror story. This sounds like a really nice story. I just where is he? What's he doing? How is she not heard from him? For two?

We need to get a private detective on this guy, Like you know what, Like this sounds crazy, but I actually looked out how much private detective costs recently for a friend's boyfriend, and.

Look, they're not that expensive. It's about sixteen hundred dollars for a little search out.

Maybe we can maybe put like a little kiddy together. We need to go fund me to find this guy. He must have like a family or a girlfriend, like a secret like wife or something.

Well, when you're eight months, you're eight months into knowing someone, you've fully met their friends or family. Let's be realistic.

Sure, yeah, like.

Him on Facebook, social media?

Like maybe he's just gone like ghosts on all of it.

Maybe he didn't have a lot of friends and family, Like maybe he didn't. Maybe he was like from interstate, Like who knows.

Okay, let's let's look at it again. What's he getting out of that?

I Mean what I'm thinking is like maybe he was in a long distance relationship, he's moved overseas, he meets this girl, he's obsessed with her. Everything's like rose colored glasses, and he still has his long distance girlfriend in the background. And then he's like, fuck, I need to go back to her and just ghosts. I mean, unless he died, he's guilty. He's either dead or he's guilty, and I'm gonna go with guilty.

Fuck I hope for our sake he's not dead.

How do you get over that level of mental trauma?

Though?

Like I just when I think of like all of yeah, like when I think of all of my trust issues, and like I've been through a lot with guys, like I really have. But I mean we've been together with our partners for you just hit a year. I'm just a little bit over. I can't imagine Michael just like running and like imagine Jen just never hearing from Like I'm laughing because it's so shocking. I'm not laughing funny, just like just pack up.

Look, that's wild. I feel sorry for Steff. That's someone like that. It's not everyone does that. That seems like a real sort of funck up.

That's someone with like a lot of like mental health issues that needs a lot of help or like has extreme narcissism and just like you know, should.

Probably be locked away some concerns.

But it's such a blessing in disguise that this happened now and not in like five years, ten years.

Gets out of it, Like, where's he getting off? All right?

Sorry to hear that, ste Yeah, Steph, We're so sorry.

Okay, So this one comes in from Louise and let's hear about her crazy X story.

Hey a mat Nana, Madame Louise, and this is my crazy X story. So it's not my ex, it's actually the guy I was with. It was his ex, So it was this night, went over to his house, mind drew. His house is literally in the middle of nowhere in country Victoria. So we went over, hung out, had a few drinks. While this was happening, his ex was constantly ringing his phone, like blowing up his phone non stop.

She got physical with him.

As he was like trying to get out the door and into the lound room, and then like all I could hear was screaming outside like calling me all these names, trying to figure out who I was.

He was trying to get her to leave.

She literally refused to leave, and this like went on like half an hour. I'm just laying there naked in bed anyway. So after about half an hour so he came back in and then told me I was actually the one that had to do So after all of this, it's about three point thirty in the morning, I had to pack up my shit get out of there. And drive home, which was so much fun. So yeah, that is my crazy X story.

Imagine the walk of shame past and though.

Oh my god, I actually my heart is breaking for Luise.

That is awful.

I'm going to say it now, and I'm going to say it from the start. I don't think it was his X.

Yeah, I don't think it was his ex. That was my first thought. It sounded like they were still very much together or seeing each other or break here.

Yeah, something like that.

Wow, why would he like men like that? Is just so annoying? Like number one, if this girl's blowing.

Up his phone to that level, surely they're like still very much talking often, right.

Yeah, So I one hundred percent think they're either broken up, yes, but they're still hanging out, they're still sleeping together, They're still he's still giving her the right to feel like she can do that, do you know what I mean? Like he's still seeing her, he's still sleeping with her.

Just so stressful?

Like imagine being Louise and literally like they've just had sex, like you know, they've gotten hot and heavy, great sex, go to sleep, and then this girl comes storming in.

Like what would you do if you were Louise in bed and O girl came storming in?

I mean I feel like when he's outside talking to her for thirty minutes, like I feel like that's all too much. It's either like get the fuck out or I'm going to call the police. And if you're not leaving immediately. But if I was Louise, I would just leave myself because I'd be like, if you're willing to chat to her for that long and even just like he's engaging with her for that long, like I feel like that's a red flag and I'd be like I'm out.

Of there then asking Louise to leave.

I mean, I was seeing a guy once and you were like he's still seeing his exuna, and you were right, So I feel like, unfortunately, I think that you are right. Again, I think it's not his ex but then again like from experience, well yeah, typical, maybe I know that. Think Also like I feel like like the other girl in that situation, she needs to, Like, I feel like the slut shaming thing is just it's not it Like, if you have a problem with him, he's the one in

I was about to say they should probably team up against him. He's the one who's playing or leading you both on and sleeping with you both if what we think is true, So they should probably talk to each other.

Look, I'm just gonna put it out there.

If someone's not answering my calls, no matter how much I'm blowing up their phone, I'm not rocking up to their house.

I'm not rocking up to their house unless it's like a boyfriend. And I'm like, I'm gonna catch you cheating.

You wouldn't rock up unless it was your boyfriend.

Well, wow, it's just that story is just cooked. I'm stressed out.

Well, when we put out a feeler saying crazy X stories, what do we think we're going to get?

All?

Right?

So this one comes from Carly.

Hi, Matt, and Anna. It's Carlie here, and this is my crazy X story. So I broke up with my ex, I started seeing somebody else. My ex found out about it. He rocked up to my house when I wasn't there, Thank goodness for that. He broke in, went onto my MacBook, took photos of private text messages between me and the new person that I was seeing.

He said them to.

My dad, my brother, his parents, ends, He showed all of his friends and some of our mutual friends as well. And when I got home, my MacBook was completely smashed, my TV was smashed, mirrors were smashed, and my bedroom door just was not even a door anymore.

It was just completely shredded.

So yeah, and then about a week later, the person that I was seeing was driving his car and his wheels fell off. So someone had actually cracked his nuts, like wheel nuts on his car. And it was just a little bit of a coincidence that all of that just kind of happened all at once. Him and his friends were also trying to add the person I was seeing on social media as well. So anyway, fun times.

Wow, that's like that's where that's at a level where it's like that's like abuse.

Well, he's broken the law, he's broken into your house. Yeah, that's like E vandalized your stuff. That's a criminal offense. I don't get breaking mirrors. That's seven years bad luck on his behalf.

I hope he gets every every year of that bad luck. He deserves it.

I'm so glad that she's broken up with this guy, because he sounds like the most toxic piece of trash there is to go to that level. It's so it's such an intrusion of your personal space and for her feel like her own bedroom isn't a safe haven for her. And he's willing to go to such length to be sending like private messages. It's so toxic and narcissistic.

I've had my heart broken by girls in the past, right, Yeah, I would never want to send people messages with their new partner, like private messages. Why would you want to read that? Why would you want to put he's trying to make her look bad. It's toxic at its highest, Like, I just can't run my head around why would you want to see messages with their new partner?

Like it sounds to me like he has a complex where he believes that she is his property. So he's kind of like you are mine and I'm going to show everyone what you're like with this guy. And I think that he genuinely thinks that he is above her, And I think it's just such a to Like, just hearing it just gives me the chills because it's so like scary and toxic and thank god she's not with

That's scary to be Clearly.

He has anger issues and needs to get them figured out. Breaking a door? What about the directon was a coincidence that her new partner's wheels fell off?

It's imagine if he died, that's manslaughter. Hyt, that's like serious, And I really hope she's put in a police report about that guy because it's not well behavior.

Yeah, like there's a toxic X story.

But then I feel like that's to a point where it's dangerous.

Yeah, you need to file the police report or get the police involved. Well, you said breaking and entering and vandalizing property like that's just not on. Yeah, you've never been like that to do that.

Like, I've done some crazy things before, like when I was missing my ex, Like I've driven past his house, but that's as far as it went. I wouldn't even look like even getting out of the car, Like I wouldn't even stop the car.

It's just like little drive pass.

We've all been there here. Yeah, but it's just fucked breaking into the house that scares me.

And I feel like I just really hope that that behavior is given a serious root awakening, but hopefully the police being involved in that situation.

Nah, far out hot one, but so hot and spicy.

I didn't expect it to go that way, Yeah, neither did I.

Look.

I thought they were going to be a little bit more tame, a little bit more fun. But like I said, what happens when you put out a crazy X story, we should expect them to be crazy. Yeah, we thought we had crazy X as well. We just got showed up by our three listeners.

But that's how we're doing this episode and this segment, and we want to make this a regular segment. So if you guys are liking this, please let us know, and hopefully this is a continuing episode because you guys send us so many issues and crazy stories that are going on in your life, and you know we love reacting to them, we love hearing them.

We try to get to as many as we can, but obviously we can't, so we want to do it on here. So if our producer Alex reaches out to you and wants you to send a voice message, please be open to doing it. We can't wait to hear it, and I know everyone else will want to listen to it as well.

Yeah, just a reminder to email your voice note to Where's your Head at pod at gmail dot com.

Okay, Matt, I think that's all we have time for.

Until next time.

Bye bye.

Considering the stories we've heard today, If you or someone you know it needs help in a domestic situation, check out the show notes for more information,