Welcome back to the Where's Your Head At? Hotline, our weekly show where we catch up with each other and connect with you all on our hotline voicemail.
We want to hear from you, guys, so please send your stories, questions, advice or tea to Where's Your Head at pod at gmail dot com to be featured on one of our episodes. I'm Anna and I'm Matt.
Let's jump in.
Good morning Anna, Hello.
It's in a shaky morning in Melbourne.
Hello, great Khan, Great the honeyway to start this off?
It as there was a four point five magnitude earthquake in Melbourne and I missed it.
As always, we were talking before we got in here. We both slept through both the most recent earthquakes.
Yeah, I don't know how. I mean, I do know how.
Well, why did you sleep through the first one? Because that one was obviously at ten am. A lot of people would say we should have been away.
And I agree, Well, so you slept through it too, a fucking.
Log I had no idea. Me and my roommates spoke off and we're like, everyone's posting about an earthquake. But to be fair, it was during the middle of lockdown wasn't it.
It was like we were allowed out.
Maybe it was a weird time.
It was a lockdown ish time.
Yeah, and we were all partying the night before you were. Yeah, so we like slept right through our well, we didn't have work. We did enough to get up.
It was alarmed.
We're from home, just signing and that's it.
So the last earthquake that happens in Melbourne, I was up at six am on the dot and I was like living life. And then Michael and I decided to have a bit of sexy time. And then after that we were exhausted, so we went for a nap and during the nap is when the earthquake happened.
Nothing beats a midday nap, though, was your partner. I can agree with that after sex as well.
No sex nap like you need at least like thirty minutes. But we felt so left out because this happened at ten o'clock in the morning. Then we woke up like thirty minutes later. Everyone's talking about it, you know, the family group chats are going off, Oh my god, we've lived through an earthquake and we just like had no contribution.
I'm almost sort of jealous that people who have heard it and felt it go off and I haven't, you know, I want to feel in it. Oh, I shouldn't say that, but you know, of them mild not a serious one.
Yeah, well there is after shocks apparently supposed to be happening. So I'm kind of like half expecting us to be doing this podcast and like.
Fingers cross room, fingers shaked, fingers crossed. So they did wake me up though, in the middle of the night. What a fucking possum was like kissing at my window. It felt like it was literally on my window kissing at me while I slept.
I hate possums.
It was fucking weird. I like threw my pillow out the window, but it didn't go away.
You know those people who like feed possums and just like get around them, like I just I see them as a rodent, Like I can't even get around them at all.
My mum the other day was looking at it was like, come we at it. It's so and I'm like, it's a fucking possum.
They look like oversized rats to me. I hate rats, and when you compare them, you're just like I can't look at them.
The same I am there. Used to be like I was talking about this the other day with Mum when we saw that possum. Remember how like growing up used to think where's the possum? Everyone would mention that there was possums. Now you just see them all the time.
Do you. Yeah, I don't see possums all the time.
Probably where you're living where I am now, there's always possums. Am I still driving you home?
Yes? Please?
Well, I'll just warn you about something on the waykend Oh god. So I was going through Maca's drive through for probably my third coffee of the day.
You loved Maca's drive through, and you know what, I'm always on the phone to Matt and he's like, I'll just give you my MacDonald's code. I'm like, why do you have a mac Donald's code. It's so strange.
Because if you get what is it, if you get like three coffees, you get a free one with the points they accumulate. So I'm just really as fuck. Yeah, that's why I always use my Maca's code.
You're living a better life than me. I don't even know.
There you go, yeah, that's a recommendation. Then you go use your Maca's code.
How do you get them?
You just download the app and you just tell them your code, and then it like accumulates the points and then the points that you get for a coffee, it's like three, and then you get a free one and I always get mediums and then the free one is large.
To be fair, though, on the weekend I had the worst MacDonald's coffee known to man. It was like burnt. It was like gross, and I normally love a Maca's coffee.
I wouldn't blame Macis. I'd blame the barista.
She was under like a lot of stress, to be honest. It was like you know when like you're going to Macis. Sorry to like divet from your story, but like you know when you go to Macas and the cue is like phenomenally long, and you're like, I'm gonna have to walk in, So you walk in and then you see the deep amount of stress that they're under. It was a Sunday at nine am, and like the chick I was like, you know, her for head was like sweating.
I was like, let's make sure that doesn't get in the coffee.
Well that was the that was the time I went so I was getting like my third coffee. Then the line of the drive through and then they say that the coffee machine's broken. Imagine my imagine my thoughts. So I go, all right, well I would just grab three hash Browns. I'll go home, give some to my give some to my mum. So I was like, all right, So go through, pay, get to the next window, and they hand in my bag and I go to drive off. So I take a little bit drive forward and then
I gouck, this bag is a bit heavy. So I look in it and it's a sausage and McMuffin or whatever it was. I don't know. It was like a muffin. Yeah, yum. But I want my hash Browns because I didn't even want to get them for me there for my mum. And I was like, you know what, fuck this, So I chuck it in reverse. As I'm reversing, there's no cars. I just hear c crunch and I was like, no,
what is that? Turn around? And I've hit like the dry through sort of like you know, ledge as they like give you yes, and then I've literally come to the window and as I've gotten to the window, the whole mac of staff He's like looking out the window at me, and I'm just like, yeah, you gave me the wrong order, and then it actually makes me so embarrassed. And then the girls like what is your order? And I'm like, oh, three hash Brewers, and then we just swapped him and I was like, do you need my
insurance details? And she's like it's fine, and I just drove off.
So what was the damage.
Well, I'm in the old work cute, so it was like a metal tray, so nothing happened to me. And I think I just put it like a lot. I'm going to go past. I'll take a photo. Even this morning, I didn't go to Maccas. I went to like Crispy Cremes because I was like, I can't go back there for at least a.
Week, at least three working business.
Day just to lay low. But I think I just like scraped and light left.
Oh my god, that's so embarrassing. And the fact that they all came to the window.
It was literally like probably six or seven of them, just seven of them just looking at me and was like, so you.
Just doubled down. You weren't like true to I would have like gone bright red like you know, when really embarrassing things happen, my face will just like burn up like a beat road.
I'd be like, nah, I was flying with it. I was just like, I was like, get you the wrong order? Well, one would argue I've been in a lot of prayings or accidents, but oh.
God have you.
But it would be if you divide the amount of hours I've driven with how many.
I don't know if that's the thing hours.
It's probably the normal person amount of prayings by my age.
No, no, no, no, you just cannot get away with that.
It's a solid I reckon.
It's a solid argument as as you have more driving hours and work than up, you should be becoming a better driver and you shouldn't be making the same careless.
Not all accidents are my fault, though, I mean other people to the.
Macas drive where I'm going to go with is your fault.
I love the fact I get home and I went to my mum. Yeah, I crashed into Maccas.
Into Macca's actual building, like the.
Actual building, And she was like, what, You're right, and I'm like, and I explained it. We're just laughing, do you know what?
Funnily enough, my first in car collision was had a mac Donald's. So I don't think it's as rare as you think.
You went up so on they what happened? That sounds so dad in context, in context.
To a car car accident. Yeah, so I think I was like fresh eighteen. I think it was probably like my third MACS drive through very exciting times. I think I had like looked on my phone very bad.
You don't do it.
No, No, this is before the time of maccas codes. This is in twenty ten, but I'm still very much in school, and I think I just like took my foot off the accelerator, just like because I was looking at my phone, and I just like slowly, at probably like two kilometers an hour, I just rolled into the person in front, and they were so mad at me, and I like burst out crying, and I was like, I'm so sorry.
I've never been mad at someone in an accident when they've hit me.
I'm like, yeah, I get so emotional. Wells so emotional.
That's a good point. I didn't realize until I got into a car. Remember my first time in a car, that it rolls if you don't have your foot in the bobble. Yeah.
It was a good lesson for me.
Yeah, my family friends on the main road in Chadstone. I just was hopped in and I thought i'd be smart ass and started and it started rolling and I was like, what the fuck?
Yeah, old cars, Yeah.
Lesson for everyone. Yeahut there, how's your weekend?
It was good. We went on a little staycation to the Massiveden Rangers. Very fun. Have never been there. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe, yeah, I think you're you're the GPS, you.
Know, Okay, it's right.
I love about how you asked me the questions if I.
Would ever know, well around that area, I should know it's around there.
We did a hike which Michael and I haven't done a hike in two years because the last hike we did it was in Thailand when Michael tried to like force me on this hike and it ended in like tears, literalities, like I was literally crying and I was like, I can't believe you put me through this trauma.
Who walks for fun?
Michael? Michael, people do like to hike for fun. And you know what, I couldn't understand it.
But I was about to say I wouldn't mind doing more of it.
Yeah, I had the funnest time ever. So like, if you're not a hiker, I'm gonna recommend that you do the hanging rock. Michael was calling it the hanging cock and I almost said hanging cock, but it's not. It's hanging rock in the Mount Massiden Ranges. It was beautiful.
How long is the hike?
It's like thirty minutes up, thirty minutes down, which is bad. Which is the optimum time?
Really good?
Yeah, because then it's like like if halfway through the hike you change your mind, you're only fifteen minutes up.
It's too hard to turn back around to be like na, this is it.
No, But like when we got to the top, it was like very rocky and it kind of felt like we got to like explore and like find our way and it's cool. It was adventurous, it was fun.
Was it a waterfall or was it more just rock hanging?
It was it was a rock hanging hanging rock.
It's a pretty self explaining.
Very self exclita. True. Yeah, but when before we actually went on the hike, this lady was like, oh, there was like this group of like private school girls who went up there and got lost, and it was like this spooky myth and apparently it's a movie, has been a movie, is a movie.
It was like a horror movie.
I'm not sure because I haven't seen it, but it's a movie of some I to watch it. Yeah, I'm gonna watch it actually since I've just done it. But I was like, why would you tell me that right before I climb it?
I think that sounds like an urban legend.
People love a spooky ghost story, don't they.
Yeah, it was one of the horrors I watched on the weekend was actually urban legend and it's about like all the urban legends from in the past that people told.
What do you mean urban legend? So and like, yeah, what is that.
It's when people tell through generations a story to scare people interacting in a certain way in a certain way, or do something in a certain way.
Interesting. Yeah, I love that, very interesting.
So I feel like that's an urban legend. Yeah, to not get lost.
Yeah, But overall, great weekend. It was nice having a little staycation. By the end of it, we did kind of miss home though, like sometimes you know, you just missed your own bed, so you had two nights we had two nights there at Cleveland Winery. It was beautiful. There was like a fire, There's like lots of like nice property to explore. It was just so cold, like when you get out of the city you forget that it drops down like a few degrees.
I like that though, the staycation that would be made.
I like it when you're prepared to. I mean I did pack for it, but I feel like if I was to do it again, i'd go buy some thermals. Anyway, how was your weekend?
Good? Just had another chilled weekend. I went for Walks coffee past our. Horror movies are usual. I know I was in but I was in the sauna the other day, so I just want to I don't want to get like this little ranch going, but just let me say it because I almost feel bad that insay something at the time. But under the circumstances you're in the sauna, I'm not gonna, like, you know, have a go in front of people.
So I'm interested. Yeah.
So I was in the sauna, and at my sauna you can see the gym, so if you sit there, you can see like the big windows of the gym in the sauna. Yeah. From the sauna windows. You can see the windows of the gym with a view.
Yeah, it sounds nice.
Well, you can overlook the whole like the whole aquatic center, so all the pools you can see after the gym. So there were these two blokes sitting there and I later found out when they were kept talking that they're actually fathers and had wives and they were talking about that. But they were sitting there and they were looking up at the gym and there was like this this lady training and they were making like misogynistic derogatory terms at
this girl. I'm not going to repeat them like on here because I don't want to give that like you know, the time of air. But they were saying just shit about her training. And I was sort of sitting there and I was like, like, that's a woman out there training, like trying to give it a go, and you're just making fun of her. And I just was like, like, that's somebody's mum, someone's daughter, someone's sister, Like, and you guys have kids yourself, how would you feel if someone
was saying that shit? You know what I mean.
It's gusty and it makes me so mad.
I feel bad for not like saying something, but you're in a sauna and like you're trying to relax, you're not going to speak up to these guys. Like what happens then, like you say something and it makes awkward like I've got you know, like you might want to get in a fight. I might get into a fight, yeah,
and like I don't have time for that. So I'm going to use like this platform to say to men, like it's twenty twenty three, like be better, like do fucking better, like don't don't like have a like a laugh of your mate something past that.
Yeah, it's so foul. It honestly makes my blood at boil hearing you say this. The fact, like you know, people go to the gym to like you know, work their bodies and like help their mental health, and it's just sad that it's not a safe place. Yeah, creepy guys like that talking about someone.
And they're not fucking like they shouldn't be throwing rocks in their glass house like they know, oil paintings themselves and then to put someone else down for you know, going out there and training, like fuck you.
The fact that these guys have like wives and kids, that's so wild. Yeah.
Well, the rest of the way they were talking was sort of like derogatory as well about other things.
I was just like about their wives just.
About like, yeah, he was one of them had gone away and it was I could to get away from you know, the missus and the kids or something, and I was just like, you guys are fuck with It's like, yeah, gross behavior, and it's just like I thought were better than that, Like, come on, it's twenty twenty three.
Do you wish now in hindsight that you had said something or are you kind of just like what can I do?
What can you say? Like could you say something to him? And then like what they get angried? Like you don't know, like if they get angry and the next you in a fist fight and the sauna.
Yeah, I have things like that as well, where like I feel like my personality is very like I try to be a people pleaser. Like when I meet people, I like, you know, try to make them like me, like you know, not try to make them like me, but like I want to give a good first impression and like make people feel comfortable and all of those things.
But if someone says something that they don't agree with, and it happened to me actually at the hairdressers probably last year, someone said something that was very below the bell and it made me feel extremely uncomfortable. It was the hairdresser who was doing my hair, and instead of saying something, I was just like I just asked a receptionist like I was like, oh, I'd prefer not to be booked in with her again, because it was my
way of just like bowing out. But like, in hindsight, I get this like feeling of like, fuck, I should have said something, and like.
Saying something, she's just going to make like an argument and bring like I don't.
Know, would you say something in a way that's like educating, but then it makes it awkward.
But then it's like, well, the culture of the sauna is there's regulars and they come in a lot, like I haven't seen them since, but I could probably say something in the future and it just make like I don't know, It's like a lot of people say a lot of stuff in the sauna. There's a lot of people with a lot of opinions in there. Like really the other day people going on about the vaccine still and how like they didn't get it, and I was
just like I didn't say anything. I was just like, fucking enough, I'm not going to say anything to that. Like it's just like, yeah, what's the point of getting involved in that stuff. So I'm sort of known for sitting by myself in the sauna, so just relaxing, saying a thing, Yeah, I'm there to relax, but yeah, it's just like it's like what do you do, Like do
you like say, hey, like watch it. That's like someone's daughter, and then they like there's two of them, they might arc up, and you know me, I'm not going to backshy away from something like that. And then the next thing, you know, true, a couple of sweaty men are throwing fisties in a sauna. You know, it's not really the best thing for me. I know.
I'm just saying, like, for me, moments like that, do live rent free in my head? And I'm like, should I would?
I could? Well, That's why I wanted to use this platform to say something to men that are listening, just fucking be better, be better, do better, Like seriously that we're in twenty twenty.
Three, Like I don't comment on anyone's appearance, don't comment on anything about anyone.
Yeah, it's like positive exactly, and it's not your place, like they're out there trying to train. Like. Yeah. On a lighter note, though, two separate guys have both said that I've slimmed down since going to the sauna. What's that's a positive to come out of the sauna.
Why do you need to slim down that?
Well, I just feel like I was carrying a bit of extra weight and just yeah, I've leaned up a lot more. But I said they were like saying, oh, it's the sauna. Both of them said, oh, it's the sauna. And I was like, not to do with the twenty five minutes on the step that I just did, or me throwing around weights, definding gravity and physics, Like, nothing to do with that. So I was like, yeah, this saun is mean to help.
Yes, Well, look I don't think you need to lean down.
I need to bulk up muscles.
Okay. So I have a recommendation because Michael and I last night started watching The Ultimatum. It's on Netflix. Have you seen it before? No?
What's it?
It's so good? Okay. So it's like about couples who are at a crossroads. So one like wants to get married and like start a family and all of this stuff, and the other one's unsure, so they apply for a show. One gives an ultimatum.
That will that will make things better.
Well, it's such good tv though, and then basically in the show, they basically all kind of meet each other as couples and then they all break up and they kind of go into a mixer and like get to know other people, and then they do like they pick a different person to their partner, and then they do like a trial three week marriage with the new person, and like, yeah, you say, you can imagine make a relationship. Great TV, Great TV, And that's my recommendation because fuck
it was some easy watching. Anyway, Michael's been trying to do a few things around the and we have this running joke because my ex was a trady, very handy.
Yeah, and Michael wouldn't come across as a handyman.
This is a running joke. I know Michael is going to be listening to this. I need to tread carefully, but we have this running joke where like he was trying to put up this sign at our engagement party, and in the midst of trying to put it up. I said, you're not very handy, and he's taking that extremely personally, and since then it's become this running joke
in our relationship. But it's like a joke, but he like takes it personally still, so it's like not that funny, but it's still funny, if you know what I mean.
Yeah, I don't know why he's saying it personally. I'm not a handyman. I'll put my hand up say the first s. I've done a lot of trade work in my life, but does not make me a handyman.
Maybe it's because my ex was a trade so it's like he.
Wants to you can't see Josh as a handyman.
Not that oh.
I was going to say. I mean, I've seen him work on the block. It's it's not very handy.
Anyway. It was really funny because obviously we were watching The Ultimatum last night and we were at the part where people choose a different partner to do like a trial marriage for three weeks and they have to get up in front of the group and like say why they want to choose that partner, and like everyone was crying. It was an emotional wreck. Obviously, if your partner who you want to marry is standing up saying why they
want to choose another partner. So anyway, me and Michael being toxic as fuck, I like stood up in front of the bed watching it in bed and I was like, I want to choose Julian because he's really handy. And from there on Michael and.
I we were just like, what did Michael say?
Because I can't believe you'd say that. I can't believe you'd pick Julian.
Who has he been trying to do like little handy stuff through the house to try and improve that he's handy.
Yeah, but it's like making no no. I love you, Michael. If you're listening, you're the most the handiest man from man in my life.
I don't patronize you. I remember when I first started seeing Jen, her light bulb in her bedroom hadn't been switched and she said something like my ex is meant to switch that innovative blah bla blah, and I was like, I was like, oh, here we go. So yeah, so I went to the shops, got a big and like you didn't even have to stand on anything of my height, and just switched it over. And I can't fish her. I'm not a handy man.
So you did it.
Yeah, I did it, but just be like, yeah, I'm handy, so it was a fluke. Yeah, I'm like, that's the last time, handy.
You're like, I've done one thing. Tick that.
Look, Yeah, I'll never do never do anything.
Electrics is a weird one though, because I don't want I wouldn't want Michael to like funk around with the electrics because dealing.
With live wires just but I get what you mean, no rewiring anything.
But anyway, watch the Ultimatum because it was great. And the one, the specific one that we watch because there's two at the moment, was the Lesbian edition one.
Do you recommend doing what you guys did and standing up?
No, especially when you say something that's already contentious in the relationship, do not do That's.
Just what a trigger point. Well, I promised you guys last week two recommendations.
Yes you did.
I've already had one, but so you're going to get three this week.
He's doubling down.
Yes, so my first one is a mucha late. Really, have you had one?
No? I haven't.
Actually like green tea.
I love green tea.
Okay, So it's like green tea based late. So they make it it's coffee the coffee. Yeah, so they make it like the same, like consistency is a coffee latte, but green tea taste.
It doesn't look green.
Yeah yeah, like the foam screen, Yeah, ff is green because obviously they pour it in, that's it green. Recommend it with honey though, if it's your first time, you know, just to sweeten it up a little bit.
I hate adding sugar to anything.
So do I I'm sweet enough?
How many times does here is that?
Lie? So sweet? I'll rot your teeth. But but I recomon putting honey in just to get used to that taste. That's what the barista told me.
Right, So it's kind of like those things that you need to try a couple of times, just like easy the taste of it.
But it's good if you're replacing a coffee like me who has eighteen a day and is not going to stop or slow down for nothing, it's a good one to replace it. Also, I think I might be late to this, but I love, you know, movies, watching movies, so I get popcorn to watch it. And I tried cobs drizzled popcorn, the chocolate one. Have you tried it?
I haven't. It doesn't sound like something i'd be into it. Continue that. I just don't think I would like chocolate on my popcorns.
Well, it's this thing about people putting malteesers into their popcorns, but they have a did it to like the actual popcorn has like the flavor through it.
The flavor.
Yeah, well the one I didn't have was maltese. It was just like chocolate flavor, but you get it, like it's sort of playing on that.
Look, it doesn't sound like something I would like, but I will try it because I appreciate your recommendations. Do you know what actually, remember when you gave that recommendations of when you were being healthy and you got like Greek yogurt and dorito chips. I actually tried that and it was really good.
It's unbelievable.
Yeah, that was good.
So like that's a good way. I still I still do that to this day. Yeah, still do that. I love it. It's nice.
Okay.
Have you replaced sour cream with Greek yoga?
Yeah? Yeah, That's what I'm talking about.
On everything as well, like nasty Yeah, okay, continue.
Okay, we'll look on that note. Let's jump into our hot line. Hello, you've reached Anna and that we can't get to the phone right now, but please leave us a message on our hot line after the beat.
Okay, so this hotline is anonymous.
Hey Ana, I love your pod and I've been hesitant to write in, but I just wanted to know your.
Thoughts on periods.
My partner and I've been together for a year and he's the first guy I've dated that refuses to have sex when I'm on my period. He obviously has the right to feel the way he does, and I wouldn't want him feeling uncomfortable during sex, but it really lowers my self esteem and I dread when it's that time of month. The whole time, I feel so unattractive and I'm wanted by him. I've suggested to use condoms during
that time of month, but he's strictly against it. I'll also add that watching porn is in the relationship is a boundary for me. I know I don't need to justify myself, but I went through a lot of childhood trauma around the topic and I haven't healed from it. A couple months ago, I snooped through his phone. I know I feel sick that I did it, as it's his privacy, but I had a gut feeling when snooping, I found that he'd been clicking through OnlyFans links to girls.
I know he's in complete denial of it, but I have a feeling he was doing it whilst on that time, when it was that time of my life. So it just made me feel so sick. Let me know your thoughts.
First of all, I want to say, like, just because he doesn't have sex when it's on your when you're on your period, like it's hard. I know it's hard to say, but I wouldn't take it personally, like it's not like it's not that he's not attracted to you as a person. I think maybe he's just, I don't hate to say it, but a little bit immature and a little bit like that he thinks that.
It's gross, But I think it's a personal preference, like I think that everyone has the right to pick for me, and you were comfortable with it, and I think that's been an evolution Like I wasn't initially, like when I was eighteen, I wasn't like out here and trying to like get laid on my period, but like, yeah, I think everyone does have the right to choose. As Matt said,
I definitely wouldn't take that personally. I know it's sometimes hard not to personalize things, but I just don't think it's personal.
But I did, Sorry, I did like how she was saying, like, use a condom, maybe try other things like in the shower. Yeah, so like it just washes the blood away like something like that. I think maybe that might, but who knows if he doesn't continue doing it. Do you have any tips for that?
Like I think sometimes you just have to respect people's boundaries, like if that's a serious boundary for him where he's not willing to budge. I think that it's not like an end of relationship type of thing, like the relationship can go on. But I think it's about just like you know, feeling confident within herself to realize, like it isn't the fact that he thinks she's disgusting or like it's it's got nothing to do with that.
And maybe in that week adapt the way you like what you do. Maybe it's not sex if he's not comfortable with that, maybe there's like other things they can do masturbation week, Yeah, masturbation week or like one is that like she could they could like she could get yeah, like a vibrator out and they could have that.
Well, but I think he just doesn't want to like have anything to do with it. That sort of sounds like so I'm saying.
Like vibrator, she can just put it in in. Okay, well I've got I think the sucking vibrators, know what I mean.
The sucking vibrator, because then it's like not getting missed.
You not the one that has the loop and goes in. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. I don't need to talk about all of the vibrators.
That one is. That one is. That's my recommendation this week.
Okay, let's move to the only fans because that's a different story. Because with the period, I don't think she should take it personally with the pawn. If it's something that's a childhood trauma to her and she has verbalized that, I think that might be something that she should bring up with him, even if she has gone snooping. I personally, for me, I don't think she should sit on that. It's clearly causing her a lot of distress, and I think she should bring it to her partner and say, hey, look,
I had a bad feeling. I did the wrong thing. I looked through your phone, but I did find this. Especially if it's girls who she knows, like, that's not okay. I would be furious.
Yeah, it's not just random porn side, it's like actual only fans and girls that she knows. Why is he looking at girls that she knows? Anyway, it's a bit weird.
It's a bit off and I don't know friends or it's very strang. I don't think that's okay, and I think it needs to be definitely brought to the table and not like swiped under.
Well, yeah, if she just sits on it, it's going to cause resentment and cause actual under like more issues when the underlying issue is.
That, yeah, have you ever like had a problem with your partner and you haven't told them like that you're annoyed about something and they're like.
I'm pretty vocal. I wish that I could do.
That, Like it's something that you're like, I'm not gonna like bring this up because I don't want to start an argument, and then they like sneeze the wrong way and you're like you fucking asshole.
I know, I sort of bring everything up. I wish that I was more like that.
I mean I do bring stuff up, but I mean it's happened to me like once or twice, and I'm like, you know, like you just redirect all and they're.
Confused at why you're You're annoyed at that one thing, which.
Is why we always say, don't bury your problems. Always bring them to the surface.
I reckon, she brings it up, and then it will tell how he reacts. So if he reacts in a certain way, then it might look at like maybe you know, not going further with him, But if he's understanding, maybe yeah, but it seems like he's gonna like be difficult if he's been so stubborn on the whole sex thing.
Though from a guy's perspective, do you think it's like strange that, like, is there a problem that in the time of the month that's when he's looking at the only mans or do you think it's just like a coincidence.
I don't. Well, if there's anything they teach you and watching lack you know, detective shows, there's no such thing as coincidences. I think that, yeah, he's maybe substituting sex with that only fans and porn if it's start week.
It's hard though, because like it's pru no, no, no, I'm just saying, like it's it's a hard position to be put in, Like, obviously he has to respect the fact that she has trauma around like Pawn, but then if she's kind of controlling what he's doing in regards to Pawn, that it's a bit tricky because you.
Don't want to like, yeah, I think it's maybe discussing it with him and coming to a resolution happy with both of you.
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