After an abysmal opening Wire performance, the podcast goes in search of the answers to what went wrong. Sam's positivity towards Price wanes a numerical point, Rob investigates a specifc Doctor's Hippocratic Oath, and Dennis sits on his bench as he fails to explain the unexpected. Plus, there's Mutiny on the HJ and the Powell of Love. Enjoy.
With Wire’s first game not too far away, the podcast returns for a third season. The Classification Universal Numerical Tariff Society predicts the Super League top eight. Rob offers up his thoughts on a Ugandan dictator who would make an excellent prop, Dennis‘ Tackle Bags is replaced by Fails or the Unexpected, and Sam gets all lost at sea with the new “What would Brian Bevan say?” sitcom - Mutiny on the HJ. Enjoy.
With the announcement that coach Steve Price's resilient stay with Wire is set to finish come the close of the 2021 Super League season, it's time for a Prexit debate. Joining the three usual podcasting clowns are headband wearing Dave Birch from Warrington Hospital Radio, the gorgeous Matt Turner from Warrington Guardian and some geezer called Mike Brown "innit!" . Enjoy.
It comes with great pleasure to welcome Tony Barrow to the podcast. Tony coached the brilliant Wire side that won the Premiership in 1986 - when it really was "Our Year". Merry Christmas everyone. Enjoy.
Due to Price running out of resilience it’s the last podcast of 2020. As the listeners run out of patience with Wire’s coach, we receive record amounts of listener feedback. The WhatBevan panel, known as the Classification Universal Numerical Tarif Society, rate the players. And is Cliff Richard set to be Warrington’s new boss? Sam’s shitistics “Countdown” the facts, as Rob admits his fantasy over in dictionary corner. Birthday boy Dennis goes out with a quiz of past and present tense. Plus, on ...
As the regular season comes to an end the podcasters let their hair down with a drink or twenty. And in their intoxicated state, set about reviewing Wire’s games, culminating in record number of expletives, and tarnished by Dennis' alcoholic aggressiveness fuelled by the castration of his tackle bags. Shitistics features a Chris Whitty Covid-19 impression. Daniel turns the lights out on Price as Sam reaches for the big light, Dennis for the dimmer switch, and Rob for a candle. Over on Rimmer's L...
Wire manage to win two games in the space of 80 minutes, but the listeners’ horseshit still spikes by 11.3%. With another lockdown approaching, Dennis heads for the bunker - with his video referees in shock. Sam’s expletives hit an all time WhatsApp high, before he swings his shitistics left and right. Rob, still mourning from the loss of his 17-year-old cat, goes completely conkers. And a full moon on the night of the RL Museum Halloween party, leads to a plumber’s lycanthropy. Enjoy.
Has coach Price 'definitely maybe' come up with the oxymoron quote of the season? What type of cheese, metaphorically, is Toby King? When does a fixture go from being postponed to cancelled? Just how do Wire score their tries? And where was the opposing fullback when Brian Bevan played his first game? Will Ralph and Stevie enter Strictly and be crowned glitterball champions? And did Sam say the word 'twat' on the podcast? Enjoy.
To try and make sense of another Wire loss, the podcast turns to a man that watched Brian Bevan play his first ever game for Warrington. Rob critiques the lentils on the 1876 Halliwell Jones restaurant menu. After being trolled on social media, Daniel sets the record straight. Currie‘s curry of the week is back. Dennis offers up a Rugby pool taskforce team. And by popular demand, Rimmer’s Lot returns, as Stevie visits Ralph on the hospital ward. But what cocktail of drugs will have Rimmer back o...
It’s a time for reflection as the show gets to grips with the past seven days of Wire action, but will the podcast lapse into a US-style Presidential debate? Sam digs up historical facts on Wigan’s grand tour of the Vatican to unearth which Pope told them first to “fuck off” with translations in Italian and Latin. Rob’s had a nasty fall, but even with a cracked rib, he still believes he has a better torso than Samy Kibula. Dennis’ Tackle Bags comes up with a Segway to speed up the SL referees. A...
The Big Opening Burrell's Visit A Big Turd The Canadian Call What Would Mother Do? Tony's Cardboard Cutouts Hetherington A Bull In A China Shop The Pizzeria Health Inspector Cummings A Cake Of Percentages Who Shot RR?
This week the podcast "gets its shit together" following the Sky Sports Mamomite interview. Wire make it 9 wins on the trot, with Sam trotting out the shitistics on props Hill, Cooper and Philbin - but will it take their own anagrams to split the difference? An outbreak of caveatitus sees Daniel being infected, leading to Dennis’ idea of a Halliwell Jones bubble suit with attached drinking pipe. Rimmer’s Lot comes to a climax with the shooting - not of JR but who shot RR? And taking a break from...
After another brilliant Wire victory is there room in the team for all their stars? The podcast speaks with both Widdop’s and Inglis’s Australian agents - but can we read between their lines? Dennis takes the game by the balls with his NAD revolutionary technology, and a header leads to a headstrong podcasters debate. Sam has a theory on crowd-less goal kicking conversions, but just what are the top 5 converts when typed into google? Rob is guilty of finally praising Anthony Gelling after he wit...
With the RFL changing the Super League table to points percentage, the podcasters have their abacuses ready. Wire score a brilliant winning try in the 97.5% moment of the match but Dennis calculates what percentage of tries are lost due to rugby posts. Sam takes us through his mathematical top-four-clusterfuck-ratio, with Rob offering to provide supportive graphs because he’s got sod all else to do. Over on Rimmer’s Lot, just what has Steve Price put down his pants to hide from Health Inspector ...
Has coach Price finally discovered his best seventeen? The podcast reflects on a brilliant collective Wire effort, along with some outstanding individual performances. And is Stefan Ratchford the best number 13 in Super League - even though he won’t be able to walk for a week? After receiving a written warning, Dennis is rubbed up the wrong way, but what are the best 10 things to touch? Sam shows an in-depth knowledge of Grange Hill but it’s Rob who’s ordered a pint of mild from Ziggy in The Tow...
With Declan set to leave Wire, the podcast desperately tries to sell off Patton merchandise. The monetisation doesn’t stop there though, with Rob pushing for a sponsorship deal that ‘plumbs’ new depths. Dennis‘ Tackle Bags is distracted by breaking news. Sam calculates how many replicas of him make up the energy of one Mamo. And is Samy Kibula’s body shape the same as Les Dawson’s lead dancer or a Henry Moore statue? Plus, on the set of Rimmer’s Lot, Ben Murdoch Masila drops by to complete his v...
Which washing detergent does Coach Price use? We may not have the answer but Steve’s attacking stats come out in the wash during Sam’s shitistics. Dennis signals the death of RL fair play, following Flakey Blake‘s show-pony antics. Rob reveals the average IQ of a podcast listener with Catchment Universal Mathematically - Generated Arithmetic Reynolds Geometrics Listener Enticer. And just what did Sky commentator Ben Proe receive in his A-level Chemistry? Plus Gary Hetherington drops by Rimmer’s ...
As Wire return victorious, the podcast can finally discuss a match... but more importantly where would Idris Elba and Bill Arthur go clubbing together? Steve Price invents a new word, “Blind-Shotted”, which turns out to be a section at Jerkmeoff.com . Dennis, restricted by recording in his holiday B&B’s public lounge, only swears twice. Sam has new graph paper for his shitistics as he blows the Chris Hill penalty myth. And Rob books a table at Wayne Bennett’s covid-bubble restaurant of choic...
As Wire get ready for action with no spectators, Area 51 takes a look at Warrington attendances. Steve Price moves away from his ‘resilience’ saying to his new quote of ‘versatility’, but are the Wolves fringe players as versatile as the Swiss Army knife? Meanwhile over the alpine border it’s the sharpness of a French cutting-edge commentator that tops the vote, as the podcast also votes on Daniel’s date night. Dennis gives Rob an elocution lesson on how to pronounce Osdal to improve his vocal r...
This week, the Podcast rewrites the Wire kickers’ record books, following the application of the Magnus Effect and kinetic energy. Dennis’ Tacklebags’ new Rugby ball invention is far from a drag. Sam’s eyes water after hearing an anagram of Danny Walker. And can Rob perfect his Brian Cox impersonation before the podcast tracks down Warrington’s Greek winger Pheidippides on the Island of Lesbos? Plus, during an on-air tiff, the podcasters fall out over Toronto. Enjoy.
As the podcast converts to Rugby Union, can Wire convert to a 58% winning ratio in their home, away or neutral bids? Dennis seeks planning permission on Saddleworth Moor for the new RL Superdome. Sam relives a 38,000ft sexual encounter with Henry Fa'afili, before Chris Hill drops by Rimmer’s Lot where there’s a sticky situation. And Rob reads a Lockdown Letter from a Barbie fan who’s the niece of a West German tank driver. Plus, not forgetting the Hezbollah and Clare Balding. Enjoy
To scrum or not to scrum, that is the question. Yes, the podcast goes in search of the phantom Super League scientific paper, as well as Andrew Johns’ file, held in Area 51. Rob details Barbie’s extensive vehicle portfolio from 1962 to 1990, Dennis’ tackle bags ‘snatches’ a pay-as-you-play scheme, and Sam can’t get enough of a bare-chested Luther. Rimmer’s Lot is back with aristocracy visiting the museum. And as the podcast misses out at the National Podcast awards in all 12 categories, tensions...
The podcast brings you a parodic sitcom set at the new national RL museum, entitled ‘Rimmer’s Lot’. And following on from the Greg Inglis scoop, the lads discuss just what he was cooking in his microwave. Sam’s shitistics analyse how much you should pay for a good hooker, which easily converts to Amsterdam red light currency. Dennis’ tackle bags has the leading sports trainer manufacturers queuing up to patent his invention, and Rob reads out a contentious lockdown letter requesting for the remo...
What would Brian Bevan say presents a podcast exclusive, as we are privileged to be joined by footballing genius, Greg Inglis. We hear about Greg's proud Indigenous heritage and how his youth turned him into the skilful player we see today. He reminisces about his time with Melbourne and the Bunnies, and explains why he is ready to continue his Rugby League journey at the Halliwell Jones. We discuss players, family and the Inglis's connection with Kempsey's cricketing superstar Phil Hughes. What...
This week’s guest Daniel, from I’ve Got A Loose Wire, educates the podcast on the hobby of blogging. Sam’s shitistics take aim at Wire coaches, but is there a coach with the capacity to take 60 pensioners to watch Arthur Askey? A player’s Instagram profile leads to a standoff between young and old, and Dennis’ new interactive referees' top, comes with a confusing dry clean only warning. A Green Party canvasser takes the full brunt of the remains of a Welsh prop forward’s breakfast. And, can Mada...
Dave Birch, commentator for Warrington Hospital Radio, is this week’s guest. We find out from Dave what it takes to commentate on the Wire, but more importantly, which player he was attracted to that wore denim shorts on cold Sunday evenings. ITV Presenter Davina McCall goes on a search for Steve Price in a special episode of Long Lost Tactics. Sam decides to read out the Wire props’ Tinder profiles to determine who’s the best catch, but it’s an ex-Wolves beefcake with a love of fishing who’s ca...
As the vertical green and red stripes win the club’s top of the tops, the ley lines are drawn in this week's podcast by determining statistically which Wire wingers are the best - but there's only one speedster that aligns with a podcaster's erection. Sam takes a confusing look at the salary cap without a caveat of VAT. Following a fan's lockdown letter sent from the Channel Islands, Rob refuses to take a DNA test. Dennis recycles more tackle bag ideas, but it's a Wolves' centre that cycles off ...
The Rugby coach Steve Anderson served a terrific apprenticeship in the heartland of Queensland Rugby League, before an incredible coaching journey took him to the newly-formed team, the Western Reds. With the Super League war in full swing, Steve would then help create the Melbourne Storm. After the Storm made history by winning their first grand final, Steve would go one step further and become assistant coach during the Australian Kangaroos’ victory at the 2000 World Cup. But during celebrator...
Has the podcast rebranded to become the Greg Inglis show? Flakey Blako preaches to his disciples about a Tuesday evening drive through, much to the annoyance of Brothers Waywell and London. Lockdown Letters receives its first transgender email, leaving two coaching styles embroiled in a clash of gender. The listeners vote relocation relocation to decide where Wire’s new superstar should call home. Dennis' new computer program V.A.N.K throws-up more permutations than Deep Blue, but it's Sam's str...
Chris Riley is this week's podcast guest. We chat with Chris about growing up and adapting to his brother's illness, and how playing Rugby League for Penketh High School gave him a great start in the game. Chris tragically lost his mother on Christmas Day, and we hear from Chris about the wonderful compassion Tony Smith showed him - a story not many have heard. We learn how Paul Cullen gave Chris his debut, and how James Lowes should be praised for his one-on-one coaching and his encouragement. ...
