Screen Time for Your Baby and Toddler

a couch potato todd right before your eyes. That is, when your eyes and attention aren't focused on your own electronic devices. Not to worry, you're not alone for most parents, especially during the time of COVID, when home isn't only where the heart is, but the off us, the daycare, the school, the store, and much more, not to mention

the three ring circus. You probably currently live in desperate times and desperate parents call for desperate measures, And if you're like most desperate parents, the line between screen time and the rest of the time has blurred. An hour per day has turned into two, maybe three, maybe more, leaving you stuck with the theme song to Moanna playing on a loop in your head and dealing with more than a little mom guilt and wondering what's the truth

about screen time and your little ones development? How much screen time is too much? And how long can you continue giving yourself a pass on your child's all access passed to the tablet and TV during these challenging times, or on your own pass to the phone you're never without. First, let's lose any gilt you have, because, as you know by now, what to expect is a no guilt zone. Then let's talk the realities of TV tablets and you're

taught speaking of moms in screen time. I'm here with Emma, Hey, Emma guiltiest charge. Yeah, let's just say she's walking the walk to the couch with those couch potato tots as we speak. And if we're being real, which we always are here on what to expect, I'm pretty sure I know your philosophy about screen time and kids because I've seen it in action, but maybe not everybody listening does,

So why don't you share. I'm definitely a little or a little guilty of excess screen time situation currently, I don't think I was as bad. And then COVID happened, and I kind of threw all the push into the wind and lead with the tablet. But I also have to cook dinner, right, I have to pay it. And I have a toddler that is so far up my you know what, that he's going to sit on my lap when I'm peeing if I don't give him a screen So they love it. They love a good screen time,

and I love the few minutes it gives me. But I do try to engage sometimes with them about what they're watching that's really important. So Sebby is more into TV and and Lennox is more into video. Sebby is all into YouTube. He loves Baby Jake. He wishes Baby Jake was his biffle best friend for life. Sometimes he'll like copies everything they're saying. So I feel like it's somewhat educational because he he's learning, and I do try to have him watch things that have some sort of

educational value. But I mean he does like watching Peppa Pig. Yeah, so with Pepper Pig at least he learns a British accent. I mean, that's the only reason I let him watch Peppa because my goal is for him to end up with a British accent. Okay, you're on your wing. I'm love with I know you sometimes do, but I don't know if you fall through much. Do you use it as a reward or take it away as a consequence of behavior. Look, the consequence consequences me, not them. That's true.

I try with Lennox more, especially because Sebby's just turned two. He barely understands what I'm saying to him normally, So I'm like, I'm taking the TV away from you. He'd be like, car, you know what I mean. It's not like a thing. But Lennox, I use it more of a consequence. But then sometimes I give in because I'm a pushover. Okay, more about that later. So I would say, you use it mainly as a babysitter. Look, that is

my free babysitter. I'm gonna own it because honestly, I feel less inclined not to lie to you guys because of COVID and be like, look, we're all in this right now, and this is a whole thing. This is literally like their lifeline to the outside world. YouTube videos with other kids. It's the only time they're getting to, you know, see other or pigs or pigs or pigs?

Do you tend to use it as background noise also sometimes So you know that my childhood was a tad different and even yours was because when I was little, I was allowed literally one hour of TV per week. You're talking about my childhood. No, no, no, you had Sesame Street every day plus one hour. No. But when I was older, I only had one hour. I remember this because I watched Full House. Okay, so my mom was super strict about it, and I think I relaxed

a little. I wasn't even allowed to watch TV when I was home sick. I had to read. I mean not that that's a bad thing. It was a good thing in retrospect, but at the time everybody else was watching TV constantly. I felt a little cheated. But I was, you know, on the strict side with TV when you

guys were little. And I'm happy about that because you spent a lot more time reading and a lot more time playing, and you know, yeah, but I feel like you did disservice to me because now I feel guilty because I'm like, wait, I was outside do them all the stuff, and now my kids are in from those tablets and damn it, Mom, Now I feel bad. I had such a great imagination. No guilt, no guilt. We're in a no guilt zone. Remember, no no guilt. I

do it to myself. We do it to ourselves. But it's funny because Lennox knows he can't turn on the TV when he gets to our house and Sabby's at our house, the TV is never on. I mean they watch it on special occasions or they have their special TV time, but they managed to get along without it, so I guess, you know, they kind of accept whatever the house rules are, which is which is super common. But it's usually the other way around. I hear from

parents all the time. My parents, you know, the grandparents are always spoiling the kids by giving them so much TV time or so much iPhone time. Yeah, but you can't wait, how are you going to spoil them? Already? Give them enough. It's true. It's impossible to spoil your kids. You've already done it. I know. So let's take a quick break, and when we come back, I'm answering the biggest questions you have about screen time and your kids. No guilt allowed. Okay, mom, So let's talk screen time.

What are the biggest concerns about screen times in our little ones, not that I really want to know, but I figured I should ask this. Oh look, I mean, nobody really wants to know, but it's good information to have. Really, the biggest concern about screen time is what kids are missing out when they're doing screen time, and that's a

lot of actually really important stuff. It's time they would spend learning by doing and exploring and interacting and socializing, problem solving, creating, using their imaginations, you know, fine tuning fine motor skills, flexing their brain power, and flexing their actual other muscles. And that's true at any age. For babies, there's a lot more downside to screen time. First of all, babies don't get TV. They're absolutely mesmerized by it. The

lights and the sounds suck them in. But studies show that infants can't learn from TV. So even when they're watching you know, so called educational programming that's supposed to speed up language development, the research shows the opposite that it actually slows down that development. And that's because babies and toddlers learn best from people. That's where they learn their language, their social skills, emotions, empathy, Like I always

say human interface. There is no app for that. And for older kids, Lennox this age, too much screen time has been linked to reduced attention span and that's not a surprise because everything's bright and shiny and flashing all the time, and so when they go to something like a book, it's just by nature less exciting. And listen. I know TV is easy, I know it's fun. I know kids love it. I know it gives parents a

chance to get things done. But that's what the researchers, doctors, experts worry about when when it comes to screen time becoming all the time or even a lot of the time. And that's actually what worries me too, and sometimes why I gently nag. You love nagging ever so gently. Okay, so what are the rackammended guidelines? I know you always tell me about the peak guidelines. And then when I asked the pediatrician, she's like, it's okay, don't feel too guilty.

So your pediatrician is Dr and Cross me, and she happens to be on the communications team for the a P and so she's always my go to for guidelines. So it's funny she says that to you, but she knows you, and she knows me, and she knows you're already hearing it from me, so she does tread gently. So that said, here's what she would tell anyone else,

because these are the guidelines. AP recommends little to no screen time for babies and toddlers under the age of eighteen months, except for video chatting, and video chatting is especially important these days, you know, family being far away and can't visit or fair or not currently in your pod. And no more than one hour per day of high quality programming for older toddlers and preschoolers, and no more than two hours per day for school aged kids. And

is that realistic? Maybe maybe not? Maybe probably not right now when everyone's stuck at home and there's no easy escape to the children's museum or the play boundary even for walk around them all or a visit to a friend's house, and your reality is trying to keep your little one busy and happy all day, every day, and your entertainment options are strained, and so is maybe your patients and ps. When you're only one person and you

happen to be a human person. Okay, so it might not be that realistic, but clearly there will be days when limits are exceeded or ignored all together, like when you have to zoom meetings in a row and they're running over an hour each and having a whiny toddler on your lap, tugging on your hair and smearing banana on your keyboard. I must sound familiar. I feel that

so deeply. It's not gonna cut it. The main thing is you try to set somewhat realistic limits, and then you try your realistic best to follow them under these circumstances. Keyword try, try, try exactly. And the truth said, I mean you've noticed this. Kids who are used to limits, they might not embrace them, and they'll definitely challenge them, but they're also more likely to look at them if super grudgingly, Like Lennox always says, you're so mean or

you're so rude. Oh my gosh, I like hear that in my sleep. I know me too. But it is important to remember and to remind yourself and sort of make it your mantra that you're the parent. You run the show, and that includes deciding how many shows are gonna be watched and which ones, and if you don't quite buy it yourself, you just have to practice it in the mirror until you do, like an affirmation every

day me, parents, you kid. Maybe I should write that on my mirror and lipstick or crayon or something, or smeared banana. Yea smeared banana. Sometimes I'm scared of my kids. I feel like they're the parent and I'm the kid. They're scary, I know, but you have to face your fears. How do you set limits when toddlers don't have concept

of time? How? Yeah? So timers are actually helpful because time is, you know, a very abstract concept for toddlers, even for preschoolers, and a timer can make it more concrete. But the important part, of course is the follow through. And that's true of absolutely everything in parenting, because if you don't follow through, you're just completely screwed. Yeah, that's not my strong suit. So when the episode is over

or the timer rings, that is not the time to negotiate. Okay, So if you're going to allow three episodes, allow three upfront, you know, instead of negotiating one by one, because nobody out negotiates a toddler or preschool ramma. Right, Yes, So you've gotta stand firm, You've gotta stand united, if both parents are around. But once you're one more or no more turns into dad's okay, one more, two more, it's

open season. This is makes me mad though, because like when we're getting ready for bad, I say, one more episode, okay, Simon. They so the episodes O where they're like one more episode and I'm like, no more episodes and Simon's like one more episode. I'm like, are you kidding me? That's where I really get piste off at him. Right, It's super important for everybody to be on the same page with this. Okay. I know you're not supposed to use screen time as a babysitter, but of course I do.

So what's the point otherwise, if I'm gonna sit down and play with the boys, I'll sit down and play with them. If I have to get other stuff done, I'll put them in front of the TV or you know, let them have iPad time. So about that. The a P does recommend that screen time for little ones is interactive time. You know when you can and you do

this when you can. Also parents watch alongside their kids and they can chime in, and they can ask questions, they can point out characters, they can add context comment

on stories. You talked about morals of stories, and most good shows have more all any kind of life, lesson sharing, being kind, listening to teachers or parents, stuff like that, taking turns and all of that sounds great at first until you realize that the reason you turned on the TV or the iPad or the iPhone in the first place was to free yourself up to do other things.

And once you make like you said, TV time together time, there goes the time you were planning to spend on getting stuff drawne So, whether it's work, and especially if you're working at home, laundry, social media, ordering groceries, or the other thousand fill in the blank things that you have to get done, which means realistically you will use screen time as a babysitter at least some of the time.

And even when you do, you can still swoop in every few minutes and engage and interact before your toddler slips into that screen time trance that's really hard to break, and that's value added to whatever he's hearing or seeing and actually puts the educational into educational programming. But what if it's too late and your toddler is already a screen addict okay, and it's like so stubborn about it like Sebby, and hasn't melt on every time we even if we grab the remote to turn off the TV.

That doesn't sound like Sebby at all. I'm so confirmed here. It's never too late. It's never too late. Listen. There's a lot for talks to love about TV and videos.

They're big fans of anything bright and shiny, especially bright and shiny things that move and make noise, and it's super easy for them to get sucked into that video vortex and go all you know, zoned out zombie in front of the screen, and it's hard going right back to that dark screen and the dark reality that TV time is over and it's all of a sudden, really rude awakening, and that's what he's experiencing. And also watching

TV and playing games on the iPad. It's so much easier for um then, you know, playing from scratch, having to use their imaginations, and especially for someone Seppi's age, his attention span is so fleeting and playing by himself is not as much fun, and plus he has a serious jones for attention, so it's definitely easy to grow a couch potato or two couch potatoes. But even Sepi, even sepy tantrum throwing two year old Seby, he is still relatively mashed potatoes in your hands. He really is.

So you can reshape mold his TV watching habits more easily now than you're ever going to be able to in the future once he starts growing some of those couch potato roots on the sofa. And even Lennox, you know, Lennox, you can you can reshape his Also, he's not that bad. Lennox isn't that bad, Like Lennox, Like this morning, was dressed up as a knight in shining armor, and he put a basket on my head and told me I was a princess or the queen, So like I gotta cut.

I saw some slap. They're not that bad. I think it could be worse. Yeah, but that's the thing when you when you turn on the TV, there goes the imagination. So if it's off, he has a chance to actually tap into it. And with SEV two, I mean he's always playing imaginary games with Sevy as well. So the TV doesn't inspire Lennox though, He'll be like watching something he'll stop watching, he'll turn it off and just like copy that. So he does use his imagination during screen

time sometimes that that's probably just my child. He's just very imaginative. No, I mean, it's all about limits, and if you set the limits, then they'll find something else to do. And I know it's hard, but I promise it'll work. Okay. Transition is always so hard when we say no more, and there's always an argument, so what do we do with this? All toddlers, to a certain extent,

are bad at transition. They have trouble going from A to B. So if A is well when it used to be the playground and then be his home, they have trouble making that transition. That's or transitional objects come from. But there's always going to be an argument. I don't know many kids who wouldn't lobby for more TV if they if they had a choice of extra screen time, they're going to choose it because it's fine, it's relaxing, it's easy for everyone involved. It takes no effort on

either side, and the screen does all the work. And so you plant those little butts and you buy yourself some peace and quiet. It helps to have a distraction so I talked about transitional objects or when I used to have to pry you away from the playground to go to the house, or from the house to go to the playground, it helped to distract you, to create a diversion. And the same thing when you're turning off

the TV. If you have an activity set up so that they don't have to be left to their own devices completely after they come down from those electronic devices, and of course that means you have to turn on the attention. You have to hopefully at least engage periodically in whatever activity they've been set up was so that you have a chance of them keeping going on it. But there's also you can involve them in whatever you

have to do. So if you have to clean, I know Sebby likes to clean at least a little bit, you can give them each a bottle as you know, spray bottle of water and some rags and and challenge them to a team clean competition. Right, have you done that? No? But Sebby will do anything Lennox is doing. And also Sebby. When Sebby cleans, he makes a mess. You're just making this harder for me. Okay, scratch that, but you don't

want to be a cave mom. If you give into the argument, you've already said no more TV, you're gonna get a meltdown every time, right with a lot of toddlers. If you just you know, you turn off the TV, you suggest a different activity. But if that doesn't work and he's having a full on tantrum, you can just ignore it and calmly go about your business, because that's one of the best ways to deal with tantrums anyway. Or you can try a hug and a little chat

about limits. Maybe not with Sebby, but Lennox. That works well Seby. When Sebby sometimes has a meltdown though, like he crows on my leg, it's a lot. Yeah, yeah, but that's when you know, sometimes a big hug will calm them down and then you move sometimes and then

you move on. Okay, So you always tell me not to keep the TV on in the background even if the kids aren't listening, And I know that you do that at your house when we come over, but what about when their babies, Like can you have the TV on in the background. You have heard this from maybe

Pore maybe a few times. I would point out that it's better when possible to keep the TV off when the kids aren't actively watching, because even a baby, they might seem to care less about the TV when it's on, and I think they're not paying attention, but the research shows they actually will shift their gaze to a screen in the room three times per minute, and that's a lot that's going to distract a baby from doing things

that she needs to be here and seeing. And also the background visual and the background noise from a TV that's always on, it kind of becomes something that kids and an adult become used to. They even need it as kind of the background to their lives, and that's why it's probably a better idea to keep it off. And also, let's face this too. Adult programming is for adults, and if you're watching something adult, it's not for kids.

And Emma, you've also learned this the hard way that kids here and understand way more than we usually give them credit for, and that includes things and words that they're better off not knowing at a tender age. And you always say they're not they're not paying attention, but they are. Oh yes they are, Oh yes they are. They So get all up, So do screen time and meal time mix. Okay, so I know the concept has been around for a long time, actually going way way back.

That's why TV dinners were invented to eat in front of the TV. They had little tables that you in front of the TV, and it was exactly it was. It was a big thing at the time. Of course, my mother didn't let me watch TV, never mind eat in front of TV. And let's not even get started on her thoughts about processed food. So I grew up without ever eating a single meal in front of a TV. And yeah, at the time, I felt like I was left out because all my friends had TV dinners and

in front of the TV. But in retrospect, if you think about it, she had a really good point. She did. Eating is supposed to be about getting nourishment, and let's face it, it's not exactly something that frozen dinners are known for. But it's also supposed to be a social activity. It's supposed to be family time. It's time to talk and share about your day, and that's not easy with the toddler who's not yet fully talking or understanding everything

that's being talked about. But it's worth it because family styled dinners feed the body and the soul. Once you turn on the TV, you turn off that social engagement that was supposed to be built into meal times. And when you're eating in front of the TV, it's really easy for eating to become mindless. And even for little ones, mindless eating can lead to over eating and eventually to overweight.

And the other thing about family dinners for a busy family, and every family is busy, that might be the only time during the day when everyone's together and attention is undivided. And even when you go to a restaurant, there's always the temptation to pull out the iPad for the kids instead of engaging them in conversation. But I'd rather see

them bring books and toys or crayons. But here's the thing, no devices at dinner means no devices at dinner, and it's got to be across the table, right, It's gonna be for everyone involved. So you can't have a double standard where you know you or Simon pull out your iPhone you know it's work or I just gotta check something really fast, or I gotta post something or whatever, I gotta respond to someone, Because that's fair. It's got

to be no exceptions for that. Now, in the car, a lot of parents use the iPad in the car to keep kids distracted, keep them from crying, keep them from asking when are we going to be there? But we just came home. We went to all as a family to the lake and we were driving back and I was amazed because Lennox talked the entire time and you had a great conversation. Yes it was about video and games, but it was a conversation for almost two hours,

and I thought that was amazing. But you can play games like I spy, listen to music, have a sing along, so your kids won't let you sing. So that's another story. Semi started yelling at me when I sing. I know. He said, no, Mommy, no, people are just me. Kids are just honest. We listened to our YouTube songs in the car instead of watching them, and you play name that tune, right, little Lennox. But he does it about Mario games, which I have no idea what he's talking about,

but I just humor him. What should toddlers be watching? I mean, doesn't matter if it's TV or an I pad. Yeah, I mean they're all considered screen time. So technically, if there are allotted one hour, that doesn't mean an hour of each Oh it doesn't. So the obvious advantage of the TV is that you can't bring it everywhere you go, like you can't bring it into the bathtub with you, or the market or the restaurant whatever, or to bed unless there's a TV in the kid's room, and I

hope there isn't. So it's it is easier to limit a TV compared to the phone that's always within your reach or your pocket, your hand. That said, it's really more about the content than the device. So for little ones, the more interactive the programming the better. So it should invite participation and not just random swiping, open ended play, exploration, creativity, learning about shapes and concepts and words and then using

words and later on spelling words. And of course no commercials as a plus, because Lennox always asked for everything he sees in a commercial. So if you watch age appropriate movies or shows that have positive messaging and modeling that aren't scary or violent, that's fine too, especially when you do it together. And Emma, it's easier for you because you like cartoons and Simon likes cartoons. But it was always hard for me because I never like cartoons,

so that was dad territory. You know, we all have our limits, right, I like Papa Pig. I can't. I'm not gonna lie. I like okay. So can TV ever be a good thing for kids? Can they ever learn something? I feel like some things are pretty educational more they're they're more educational than me. So no, no, that's not true at all. That's not true at all. Of course

they are. They're gonna learn things because they're a little sponges and they can soak up pretty much anything they're exposed to, and that goes for the good and the bad, depending on what they're watching and how often they're watching. But I'd compare to fruit snacks, right, if you think about it, Even if fruit snacks have vitam and see added, they're not supposed to stand in for meal because I treat,

And the same thing for screen time. So a toddler can learn lots from a TV program or from a video. You know, animals will never see in their lifetime, probably in person. They're not going to see it in their backyards. They can go to space, you know, and see the stars and the planets. But they can also learn those things through books, and books are better brain boosters because they require more focus and a kid as to use more of his imagination to visualize things, especially if there

aren't as many pictures. And they're especially educational if they're read in the mother tongue by their mother or by their fathers. So try to think of screen time, you know, as a fun educational supplement, not as a mainstay of your little ones learning life. So it's like a treat with a little value added, like a fruit snack that gives your kid vitamin C, but it's just something that's super yummy, and you choose the best that you can. So with a fruit snack, you'd go for one that

has lower sugar and no artificial colors or flavors. And when it comes to programming, you choose something educational and interactive. You can also boost learning by like what Lennox does, by taking something from the episode that they've been watching and then applying it to play. So you can encourage a toddler to, you know, to be a monkey just like the one she saw on TV, or or go to the doctor like the Big Red Dog did. Or you can make cookies together like the Pig family did.

I'm not stereotyping because their pigs. I was gonna say, yeah, you know, or break out the real crowns after she's all done with the virtual crans. But Emma, this is what you have to remember. And all the moms and dads out there, you are your little one's first and most important and best teacher. So if you're looking to help your little one learn, you don't have to look to educational programs or flash cards or apps. You just have to look to yourself. So you're not giving yourself

enough credit. And that partment okay, and up next, it's helped me, Heidi, And now it's time for help me, Heidi. We're all answer you're pressing pregnancy and parenting questions, no holds barred, no filter allowed, t m I, no such thing. We're all moms here or dad's. Chances are if you have this question, other parents have it too. You are not alone. Motherhood is the ultimate sisterhood, and we're here to help the sister out. So, Emma, who needs help today?

This one hits a little close to home for me. I feel this listener. I'm intrigued. This comes from a listener. Who says I often feel guilty because I'm always on my phone or iPad. Well, I try to limit how much I am working well home with my son. I'm stressed that I'm teaching him my bad habits. Help. So remember what I always say about you're not alone. You

really really aren't alone. Most moms use their smartphones more than they feel that they should, and actually, at what to Expect dot Com, we did a survey last year of moms with kids under the age of five and found that two thirds used a smartphone for two or more hours a day, and over a third use it three or more hours a day. And that's self reporting, so the numbers are probably a lot higher than that.

And you're also not alone with the guilt. A full sixty eight percent of moms felt guilty about their use of a smartphone and six wish that they used it less. And the top reasons given for guilt no surprise, feeling that they were neglecting their little ones or weren't fully present for them when they were using the phone or teaching bad habits. And it sounds like this mom, You're solidly in that mom majority. But instead of loading up on remorse and regret every time you pick up your phone,

or your tablet or your laptop. After all, we're in a no guilt zone here. Let's figure out a way to find balance between your electronic life and your real life at home with your little one, and it can be done clearly. Electronic Life is here to say none of us are going to move off the grid anytime soon. In last week, it casts on a reality show on a desert island, and for most of us, virtual life will continue to be a reality when it comes to work and workouts in school, all on top of an

already demanding social media life. Emma will tackle working at home in another episode of What to Expect. I promise, let's just say I've been working at home since the day I started writing What to Expect When You're Expecting With Emma, you at my breast, literally at my breast, because that was the only way to keep you quiet

while I worked. I discovered then, as many parents are discovering now, that working at home isn't exactly the dream job that you might have envisioned, except, of course, you don't have to commute or change out of this what's that you wore last night, or even wash your hair unless you have a zoom meeting, So that's a plus. When my kids were little, avoiding a smartphone or a tablet was really easy because there weren't any There wasn't even much of an Internet back then, and socializing was

still something that you did in person. So for me, staying away from the phone and off social media while I play with Lennox and Sebastian it's no big deal. Now. For Emma and and you and pretty much every other mom out there in the parenting trenches right now, it is a lot more challenging. Checking notifications and feeds, likes, posting stories and photos. It's it's as reflective as breathing, and it's nearly as hard to go without. So I

get it. Your phone is addicting, it's rewarding. It gives you a sense of community and connection with other moms you know, helps keep you saying, and of course it gives you advice when you need it the most. It keeps you in the loop, in the know in the moment, and when you power off your phone you worry that you might be missing something, or think about it this way, you might actually notice something that you would have missed if you'd been on the phone. And that's kind of

my point here. Children can't be paused. They can't be paused, and childhood can't be paused. And believe me, I've been looking for that pause button for a long time, though I think I was looking for the fast forward button when Emma was a teenager. Fair enough, But you know how I always say stop and smell the babies. That's for a reason. The fact is that children grow up in a blink of an eye, and that's a compelling case for keeping your eyes on your kids for as

many moments of the day as you possibly can. And you can't always, of course you can't, and you shouldn't have to, and nobody's expecting you to. But just as you think about screen time for your little one as something you should limit, you can start trying to think the same way about your screen time for your sake and for his sake, because, after all, little monkeys tend to do what they see, and yours is going to model his habits after yours as he grows, including that

screen habit. For me, compartmentalizing real life and electronic life just works better than trying to mix them together. And of course that's easy for me to say because I'm not with kids seven anymore. I just see them on weekends unfortunately. And for you, it might be easier to put limits on your screen time. And maybe you'll choose to do your screen time while your little one is doing his screen time, so you can do it side by side with lots of opportunities to cuddle and to interact.

Or maybe you'll wait until he's napping or in bed to dig into social or even to catch up on messages that you've been ignoring all day. Of course, you're going to do some of your parenting while distracted by your phone, and maybe you'll continue to do more than you'd like. Like you know what I say, Just keep trying,

keep trying, one day at a time. Challenge yourself to put the phone down in a place that you can't reach it as many times during the day as you can, and go gradually if that's easier than going cold turkey, or go cold turkey if that's easier than going gradually. But when you're in with your child, try to go all in so that means eyes, ears, and yes, even thumbs. Your little guy will love that you are present pretty much The best present for a little one is your attention,

but you'll also get something out of it. Kids who aren't always having to compete with Facebook for some face time with your parents might not feel as compelled to

scream for attention when they crave it. And who knows, he might even become a better listener as he grows because he'll be listened to more, and he'll also be learning one of life's most important lessons about life in the age of social media, face to face interface is the best kind of all, hands down, and one more time, just because I literally can't say it enough, you are not alone, mom. We are all in this together, and I really really hope that perspective helps who baby love,

my baby love. I need you, Oh hell, I need you. Thanks for listening. Remember I'm always here for you. What to Expect is always here for you. We're all in this together. For more on what you heard on today's episode, visit what to Expect dot com slash of podcast. You can also check out what to Expect when You're Expecting, What to Expect the First Year, and the what to Expect app. And we want to hear from you. Connect with us on our community message board or on our

social media. You can find me at Heidi Murkoff and Emma at Emma Being w t E. And of course at What to Expect. Baby Love is performed by Riley Beater. What to Expect is a production of I Heart Radio. From more shows from I Heart Radio check out the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. In my Arms, what Don't You Stay? Knija knieda Baby, Baby