All right, three, two, one. Let's get it. Welcome to another episode of what's your problem? The podcast. I'm your host Marsh Bice. And today we're going to dive into Dr. Benjamin Hardy's book, be your future self now. And by the end of this episode, you're going to elevate from a place of need. To a place of knowing a man. This one's going to hit a little bit different because see if you ever feel like that, you're constantly fighting to get to a higher place.
I mean, you're struggling to break out of your current situation, grinding, pushing, forcing, and yet somehow it just seems out of reach. It's like you're a hamster on a wheel. Stay tuned because I'm about to flip everything that you know on its head. So let me set the stage with a passage from Dr. Benjamin Hardy's book. When you think that you need something, you have an unhealthy attachment to it because needing implies that you're in a deep state of lack.
And you can't be whole or happy until the need is fulfilled. And this is where most people stay. It's that if then mindset, if I get the money, if I make this sale, if I land the deal, if I hit my goal, then I'll be in the land of milk and honey. Everything's going to be fine. But let's be real. When you're desperate for something, does it ever actually happen? No. In fact, hands raised, You probably make things even worse because instead of letting it come to you, you start forcing it.
And when you force it, it backfires hard. Dr. Hardy breaks it down into three different levels. The first level is needing. This is a total state of lack. It's the mindset of I don't have it and I can't be okay until I do. The second stage is wanting. This is a step up from needing you're better, but still it's rooted in lack because wanting something, Confirms that you don't have it and then there's the stage of knowing. That's the third stage.
This is where everything's going to shift for you. Knowing is moving beyond need beyond want. It's the acceptance that what you desire is already yours. Quote, when you know something is yours, you act differently. Then if you don't, because when you know something is yours, I mean, you know that, you know, that, you know, it's yours. You act differently than if you don't know it's yours because you're moving with certainty. You speak different. You carry yourself different.
Think about anything that you possess. You know, it's yours. How uncertain are you? I don't know if it's mine or not. No, I don't know. You know that, you know that, you know, it's yours, you come home, you stick the key in the lock to get in the door, you know, it's going to work. It's yours. You're not like, man, I hope my key works today in the lock. No, you know, this is the kind of mindset I'm talking about here. And you'll move from a place of chasing to a state of being.
Now let's talk about gratitude. And I'm not talking about, I love the blue skies, rainbows, blow pops and unicorns kind of gratitude. Gratitude is not about pretending everything is perfect, but it is acknowledging what you already have. Even if you're working for more, you got a lot to be grateful for, but if you're constantly focused on what's missing, You're going to kill your momentum because you're in a state of needing.
You're in a state of lack and you're going to get stuck in the gap instead of recognizing the gain. Dr. Hardy wrote a whole nother book called just that the gap and the gain. I mean, just look around, bro. Maybe you don't have everything that you want. Maybe your business isn't where you want it to be. Maybe you're buried in stress. Maybe the debt just seems to just keep rising. But dude, you got a good start among others today. You woke up. It's cliche, but it's true.
And we just miss out on that. At least you can breathe. At least you can move. At least you can fight another day. And when you recognize that that's a divot, you could put your foot in it and then you could push off and rock out of what you do already have. You move with power, not lack. This is the point where most people get it backwards. If I have the money, the resources, then I'm successful. It's wrong. Be, do, have, be first, do next.
And the have will follow because behavior follows identity. See, if you don't see yourself as the kind of person who wins, you lose. No amount of effort is going to change that. You have to become it. You have to embody it. You have to operate from it before it manifests into reality. Because if you get it before you're ready for it, you're not prepared for it. So you won't keep it. Dr. Hardy writes, start with being, then doing.
And let your future self lead the way most people work toward their goals. Dr. Hardy says, the ones who make it work from their goals. I mean, think about it. When you're grinding for something, what happens when you hit a roadblock? Doubt, frustration, quitting, that negative narrative kicks in. I knew it was, all this kind of stuff. But when you know success is inevitable, it is man. The time frame that you are on is eventually and ultimately until is how long it's going to take.
So, eventually, if I'm in alignment and work from my future self. Eventually that momentum is going to tip and ultimately I'm going to succeed. Success is inevitable. You don't question whether you're going to get there. I just do the work. I don't know how long it's going to be, but I just knuckle up, tuck my chin in and let's get at it. See needing is trying to get somewhere. Knowing that you're Is acting from where you already are, bro. Just stop right there.
Just think about that needing a Need to get there you trying to I mean you just you're wiggling you're wobbling. You're doubtful when you need something. I Remember a passage in Matthew McConaughey's book and I did an episode sometime back Where he was talking about an agent. He was like broke. He was living on the dude's couch and he was like man I need to get this job. Can you put in a word for me?
He was like get the F out of here, bro He said get out of here get out of Hollywood because if Hollywood knows you need this gig It's gonna chew you up. You need to know it's yours and until that time don't come back to Hollywood. So he left Took a giant reset, and he came back as a changed man to needing is when you're trying to get somewhere, but knowing is acting from where you already are.
It's a different mindset, it's a different way of operating and you can hear this all day long, but the only way that you're going to actually learn it is you got to experience it. You got to know that you know that you know, and bro, let me tell you something. It's not set it and forget it. It's not just going to come to you. You got to go get it. You got to know, be, do, and you'll have can't stress this enough. When you know something's already yours, you stop making desperate moves. You do.
You stop forcing. You stop chasing and you just start aligning. It's not on your timeframe. When it's not up to you, what you do for when it happens is up to you. I was talking to a younger manager last night and we were talking about some goals for this month and he tightened up and he's like, that's just totally contrary to what I, what I think I need to have happen need. And I said, bro. Relax. You got to relax into this and we're in sales. It's kind of hard to relax.
It's kind of hard to let things come to you, but you got to know it. You got to know what's yours. You got to know with certainty that you're going to have the opportunities and so when I know I'm going to have those opportunities, I work from that place of knowing be do and you will have just start aligning, man. So how do you move from a place of needing to knowing it's the five skills that always talking about. It's going to take five of them. Number one, communication.
You got to communicate with yourself, craft your vision. What does that look like for you? Curiosity. Stop making these statements. And start asking questions. I will tell you this, that any statement you're about to make, take a pause and turn it into a question. Don't make the statement today. That's your, just for today and tomorrow do the same thing before you make a statement, turn it into a question. The outcomes repeatedly done are going to change everything. Creativity.
Stop bitching about what you don't have. Your lack is leverage. When you lack the resources. Become resourceful. Anybody who has become successful was resourceful. They didn't have all of the resources. Sometimes what you don't have is the greatest thing because you use what you have. It improves your efficiencies. The thing that you thought you needed, you don't, it increases your freedom, your flexibility, your independence.
I can't stress it enough, but see when you need it, all you're gonna do is see lack. And it's going to cripple you versus if you say, this is all I got. Let's rub two sticks together. Let's make a spark, man. Let's go. I'm a light this motherfucker up. Continuous learning in action every day, man. I can't stress this enough. I banged the drum. Read 15 to 20 minutes every day. Something random reading every day. Write. Write about what you just read about. This is how this episode came about.
I read it and I'm like, bro That's interesting because I'm always trying to work toward a goal. What if I'm already at the goal and I work from that? That's different. That's an empowering kind of feeling. I mean, if you just think about that, what if you were, what, what if you were your future self right now? What does that feel like? What does that look like? Kind of power. Do you possess work from that? So I know it's not there yet. Work from that.
Be, do, and you will have and then productive confrontation. You got to face your own bullshit, man. Call yourself out on it. And I'm not saying kick the can down the road. I'm saying, carterize it. Like put your foot in the sand. Don't talk about it anymore. Work from a place of knowing. These aren't concepts, bro. These are daily practices. It's got to be a lifestyle for you. I mean, think about it like this.
NASCAR drivers use a technique that they call drafting, and instead of fighting the wind, they get right behind another car and they use the car's energy to propel them with less resistance. That's what this process does for you. You're not coasting. You're drafting. You're using what's already there. You're just harnessing its power. And so you're going to leverage your system So you can move faster and stronger without burning out.
If you're burned out right now, man, it's because you're inefficient because you're not drafting. And if you reach burnout, you're going to coast. But if you learn to align your energies and your motions and your movements, and you're using communication, curiosity, creativity, continuous learning and action, and a productive confrontation, if you're using that, you're going to find your lanes.
That you can draft off of and you're going to be stronger, quicker, faster, more efficient, and use less energy. Sounds crazy, but I'm telling you, man, it's going to happen. At the end of the day, you got two choices. You can keep fighting to get somewhere and burn out before you make it. Cause you're just going to flame out. Or you can start pulling from your future self and let your vision lead the way. Even if you don't have it clear cut directions, more important than speed.
Pick that direction. You have kind of a concept of what it is. Rock from that place. Your vision's going to clear up. At least you have one. So many people are trying to get through a day, a month, a year, and it's just a hamster on a wheel, man. And we just burn out, we just, we just fizzle out, we run out of energy, we're depleted. It's because we're not making the best use of our energies. We're not looking at and working from a place of knowing.
Knowing, I already know with certainty, this is for me. This is what I want my life to be. This is, this is my life. I'm gonna rock from that place. It's not gonna be overnight, man. It's not something you could just, it's not a switch. It's going to be probably more of a dial. So at first your mind's going to be, this is kooky. This is kind of wacky. Do it. It's better when it's better than where the fuck you are right now anyway. Right? Stop being here. Be where you know you should be.
Let others stay stuck in needing. It's not going to be you. You're done working from a place of lack. You're done working from lack. You can use lack as leverage, but you're not going to work from it. Um, from this point on, you work from knowing you're not chasing a vision, you're living from it. Now go make it happen. Don't keep this episode to yourself. Please help get the word out. Share this episode with one person who needs to hear it. All right. Besides you keep it simple. Keep it moving.
Never settle. Stay tough. Peace.