This month's Deep Dive series is about parenting through uncertainty. Listen to all of the episodes in the series with this Spotify playlist. How do we prepare for a future that isn’t clear? How do we prepare our kids for their future when what that might look like is also unclear? Uncertainty is an unavoidable part of the parenting journey, but in this episode we’re talking about those really uncertain times: the “this might be nothing, but we’d like to run more tests” times. The “we actually a...
Mar 10, 2025•45 min
How can women grapple with society's unattainable standards for beauty, femininity, and motherhood? Nicole Graev Lipson, author of the new book MOTHERS AND OTHER FICTIONAL CHARACTERS, discusses how she has started to divorce herself from these ideas and get more comfortable with uncertainty. Nicole Graev Lipson's essays have appeared in The Best American Essays 2024, The Sun, Virginia Quarterly Review, The Gettysburg Review, River Teeth, Fourth Genre, The Boston Globe, and more. Nicole, Amy, and...
Mar 07, 2025•40 min
If you're a stay-at-home parent, how do you answer to the people who frequently– and annoyingly– ask, "So, what do you do all day?" A listener in our Facebook group posted? "During Covid, I quit my job and I’ve been home. I drive my kids to school, work out, and manage the house and family. I’m very happy and fulfilled, especially knowing that my eldest will be leaving for college soon, I’m soaking up this time. My problem is trying to explain this to others. I have a good college degree and wor...
Mar 05, 2025•49 min•Ep. 405
This month's Deep Dive series is about parenting through uncertainty. Listen to all of the episodes in the series with this Spotify playlist. Gloria DeGaetano, parenting expert and founder of the Parent Coaching Institute, recently wrote: "There's almost not a word to express the stress parents are under right now. 'Overwhelmed' doesn't cut it. It's beyond anything we've ever experienced." This really is a strange and scary moment for all of us, and parenting through our own anxiety is proving a...
Mar 03, 2025•43 min
How do we navigate raising children when we were not set a good example by our parents? Melanie Shankle, author of the new book HERE BE DRAGONS, discusses how we can disrupt the harmful parenting patterns that we grew up with and do better by our own children. Melanie Shankle is the New York Times bestselling author of several books, co-host of the podcast, The Big Boo Cast, and creator of The Big Mama blog. Melanie, Amy, and Margaret discuss: What Melanie's relationship with her own mother taug...
Feb 28, 2025•41 min
"People pleaser" is usually both a gendered and pejorative term. Some people really do love taking on the lion's share of work in a given situation. Some people do it but are secretly resentful that they always have to spearhead endless event planning, committees, and get togethers. Here's what "people pleasing" really means and how to unwind yourself from it if it's getting to be too much. Amy and Margaret discuss: The actual definition of people pleasing versus how it's commonly used Demand se...
Feb 26, 2025•47 min•Ep. 403
The audiobook reviews of HAPPY TO HELP (written and read by our own Amy Wilson!) are in, and they're amazing. Libro.fm has chosen Happy to Help as a "Bookseller Pick," and this week they're giving What Fresh Hell listeners a free audiobook chapter! It's Amy's favorite essay in HAPPY TO HELP, and in the intro she explains why. Libro.fm's review comes from a bookseller at Alexandria on Main in Elkins, WV: “Did we just become best friends? I mean, seriously Amy, you absolutely nailed type A extrove...
Feb 25, 2025•26 min
This month's Deep Dive series is about parenting through uncertainty. Listen to all of the episodes in the series with this Spotify playlist. Is it okay for us to be emotional in front of our kids? Julie, one of our podcast listeners, asked this question in our Facebook group: Is it good for kiddos to see their moms have emotions? And how can we talk through our emotions with our kids? My grandmother lost her husband when my dad was 11 years old. She had four kids, no job. She had to take care o...
Feb 24, 2025•47 min
How do social media influencers themselves manage their expectations around parenting and their consumption of parenting content online? Renee Reina, creator and host of the "Mom Room" podcast, discusses how her ADHD diagnosis, her PhD in psychology, and her social media presence all shape her parenting. Renee, Amy, and Margaret discuss: How parenting norms have changed since they were children How Renee's ADHD diagnosis has impacted her work and her parenting How Renee manages her consumption o...
Feb 21, 2025•44 min
Did you know? Happy to Help is available on Audible- with Amy doing the narration! Should you brush your teeth with hot or cold water? Do you cut sandwiches horizontally or diagonally? How tightly should you screw on jar lids? We asked our listeners for their most longstanding, totally low-stakes disagreements with their spouse or parenting partner. And there were just too many juicy arguments for one episode! Here's part two of our final rulings on important topics. Join our Facebook group and ...
Feb 19, 2025•47 min•Ep. 404
This Deep Dive series is about reflecting on our trajectories as mothers - looking back, reflecting on where we are now, and thinking about the future. Listen to the whole playlist on Spotify. We are the protagonist in our own story, but what happens when we become the antagonist in stories we weren't even aware of? Or when we assign antagonist roles to unsuspecting partners or kids? Amy and Margaret discuss why we as humans need to tell ourselves stories, when the stories we tell ourselves migh...
Feb 17, 2025•46 min
Anxiety is diagnosed much more frequently than it used to be; that goes for our kids as well. Our parental instincts are usually to reassure them, but as it turns out, that actually isn't the solution to making them worry less. Ashley Graber and Maria Evans, child and family psychotherapists and authors of the new book RAISING CALM KIDS IN A WORLD OF WORRY, explain how to have tough conversations with your child, and how to teach your child coping skills for their anxiety. In this episode Ashley...
Feb 14, 2025•47 min
Did you know? Happy to Help is available on Audible- with Amy doing the narration! Should ketchup be refrigerated? Is dryer-lint cleaning a before or after job? We asked our listeners for their most longstanding, totally low-stakes disagreements with their spouse or parenting partner. In this episode, we render judgments. People, we're calling balls and strikes. Our determinations are final. Join our Facebook group and be part of our next episode! We love the sponsors that make this show possibl...
Feb 12, 2025•45 min•Ep. 403
This Deep Dive series is about reflecting on our trajectories as mothers - looking back, reflecting on where we are now, and thinking about the future. Listen to the whole playlist on Spotify. What does it mean to have a midlife crisis? What exactly counts as "midlife," and (yikes) are we already in it? Can we avoid the disenchantment and the rash decision-making that stereotypically accompany such times in our lives? A listener in our Facebook group asked: "Who has been thru their midlife crisi...
Feb 10, 2025•47 min
So many women feel that when they leave the workforce to become a stay-at-home parent, "Mom" becomes their primary and only identity. But Neha Ruch, author of the new book THE POWER PAUSE, reframes the shift from paid work to stay-at-home parenting—and sometimes back to the workforce— in a way that expands identity and possibilities for women going through these transitions. Neha, Amy, and Margaret discuss: Why the period of "stay at home momness" can be a great challenge to identity How the Pow...
Feb 07, 2025•46 min
We're talking about some of the topics in Amy Wilson's new book HAPPY TO HELP. Get it in our Bookshop bookstore, or wherever you buy books! Ask most people if women are "just better" at multitasking, and they'll probably agree. Didn't some study say that at some point? Aren't women from Venus and men from Mars? Aren't our brains completely different? Here's what the research really says about multitasking. Turns out we may have been bamboozled into doing more work all this time WITHOUT being any...
Feb 05, 2025•45 min•Ep. 402
Amy Wilson's book Happy to Help is out now and available wherever you buy books! Join Amy and Margaret in Philadelphia and San Antonio in February 2025 for their latest "What Fresh Hell Live!" shows. For tickets, head to bit.ly/whatfreshhelltour. This Deep Dive series is about reflecting on our trajectories as mothers - looking back, reflecting on where we are now, and thinking about the future. Listen to the whole playlist on Spotify. For moms who want to make a change, whether it's returning t...
Feb 03, 2025•47 min
How do our experiences in our families of origin shape our own parenting style? Norah Lally, author of the new book BACK TO BAINBRIDGE—and Margaret's best friend!—discusses her own experiences of becoming a mother to three children, born in very different circumstances. Norah Lally is a New York-born, Los Angeles-based writer. Her debut novel, Back to Bainbridge, was selected as an Editor’s Pick by BookLife at Publishers Weekly. Here's where you can find Norah: www.norahlally.com @norahlallywrit...
Jan 31, 2025•50 min
You can find Amy's new book HAPPY TO HELP in hardcover, paperback, Ebook, and audiobook (read by Amy !) at bit.ly/happytohelpamazon or wherever you buy books! Have you already failed at achieving your lofty New Year's Resolutions that you set for 2025? The problem isn't you. It's that year after year we resolve to fix the same things about ourselves once and for all, rather than accept that what we really need are gentle resets—consistent, continuous, and without the feeling bad about ourselves ...
Jan 29, 2025•48 min•Ep. 401
Amy Wilson's book Happy to Help is out now and available wherever you buy books! Join Amy and Margaret in Philadelphia and San Antonio in February 2025 for their latest "What Fresh Hell Live!" shows. For tickets, head to bit.ly/whatfreshhelltour. This Deep Dive series is about reflecting on our trajectories as mothers - looking back, reflecting on where we are now, and thinking about the future. Listen to the whole playlist on Spotify. Becoming a mother changes everything about us. Literally: th...
Jan 27, 2025•48 min
Many of us grew up believing in that women are particularly biologically designed to nurture—which means that a mother will immediately and instinctively know how to parent, be better at it than the other adults around her and the baby, and that she'd really prefer to do the caretaking work on her own. Nancy Reddy says all of that is THE GOOD MOTHER MYTH, and in her new book, uncovers the shoddy and old-fashioned science beneath our bad ideas about how to be a good mom. In this interview, Nancy ...
Jan 24, 2025•43 min
Happy to Help is available wherever you buy books, and at bit.ly/whatfreshhellamazon. Did you know Amy narrates the audiobook? This episode marks number 400 of Amy-and-Margaret conversations on "What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood." (There are also hundreds of "Fresh Take" interviews with experts and guests!) We're here this episode to reflect on the lessons learned and challenges faced along the way. We discuss: Our biggest parenting takeaways from eight years of this podcast Ho...
Jan 22, 2025•49 min•Ep. 400
We’re sharing this excellent list of resources to support those affected by the California fires. This list was created by writer Sari Botton @saribotton: World Central Kitchen, providing meals in the area. Donate a Meal Mutual Aid Network L.A. GoFundMe Los Angeles Fire Department Foundation’s Wildfire Fund Project Hope (“actively distributing hygiene kits to displaced families and children, procuring high-need items for shelters and health clinics, supporting health workers administering care t...
Jan 20, 2025•47 min
We've been talking about it on the podcast a ton recently: we need to spend less time on our phones. But willpower doesn't work, at least not for long. Writer and influencer Mallory Thomas, author of the romantic novel SOMEWHERE ALONG THE LINE, explains the science behind our phone addiction and the strategies she put in place that actually worked. In this episode Mallory, Amy, and Margaret discuss: The "aha" moment when Mallory realized she had to decrease her screen time Understanding the dopa...
Jan 17, 2025•43 min
Get Amy Wilson's new book HAPPY TO HELP at bit.ly/happytohelpamazon or wherever you buy books! It's a good thing to be aware of the emotions and needs of the people around us. For some kids, it can tip into hypersensitivity to others' emotions, people-pleasing behaviors, and asking if people are mad at them approximately twenty times a day. How can we help? (And is it way worse for girls?) In this episode, hosts Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables discuss: What empirical studies of gender differences ...
Jan 15, 2025•47 min•Ep. 399
This month's Deep Dive series is all about useful tips we've acquired over the years! Listen to the whole series on this Spotify playlist. We asked our listeners what minor and yet life-changing advice they have to offer. From bringing Sharpies everywhere, to cleaning the shower in the shower, to milkshakes after doctors' appointments, our lives just got a whole lot better! Margaret and Amy discuss: The correct way to boil corn What really goes in the glove compartment (not gloves) Amy's meet-cu...
Jan 13, 2025•42 min
Where do we even start when we feel like we're drowning in too much stuff? Tyler Moore, better known on Instagram as @tidydad, and author of the new book TIDY UP YOUR LIFE, discusses tips on dealing not only with clutter, but with the emotions that accompany it. Tyler and Amy discuss: Keeping only what supports your current life, freeing up space for what matters How to divide decluttering into seasons Why "easily tidied," and not "always tidied," is the real goal Here's where you can find Tyler...
Jan 10, 2025•49 min
In celebration of the launch of her new book, HAPPY TO HELP, in this episode Margaret gives Amy the interview treatment! Amy tells all about the process of writing this book, the hard times that really put her parenting to the test, and her eventual discovery that putting our own needs lower and lower down our list of priorities will never work well enough to forever-fix everything around us. You can find HAPPY TO HELP in hardcover, paperback, ebook, and audiobook (read by Amy !) at bit.ly/happy...
Jan 08, 2025•48 min•Ep. 398
This month's Deep Dive series is all about useful tips we've acquired over the years! Listen to the whole series on this Spotify playlist. Happy 6th Anniversary to What Fresh Hell! In six years of doing this podcast, we've learned a lot, changed our minds, and watched our kids grow. This week we're talking about the most important things we've learned over the last six years, and what a privilege it is to be part of this incredible podcast community. Thanks for listening! Here are some things we...
Jan 06, 2025•45 min
Cognitive biases are self-deceptive thought patterns we all use to make sense of the world. In a world that makes less and less sense, Amanda Montell argues, humans have become more irrational than ever. In her new book THE AGE OF MAGICAL OVERTHINKING, Montell explains how our brains' coping mechanisms have become overloaded—and how to slow down our panic responses when the world becomes too overwhelming. Amanda, Amy, and Margaret discuss: How magical overthinking has manifested from the modern ...
Jan 03, 2025•42 min
