Navigating Contradictions in Human Design

Here we go. Oh yeah, no countdown. Hi there. That didn't

You couldn't even take yourself, you couldn't even take yourself seriously.

No, it's true. Uh, hello there. Welcome back to Well Designed, a podcast about using human design in your life and business. How are you, Brandy?

I'm good. How about yourself?

Yeah, I'm good. Uh,

get that, you get your announcer voice out of your system?

did get my announcer voice out of my system. Alright, we can, that's alright, I can edit that out. Uh, so, today we're talking about Contradictions. I just had a brain fart on the word. Um, so yeah, today I was like, I know what we're talking about, but I can't remember the word. Uh, so yeah, so today we're talking about contradictions inside of human design.

hear two things that are conflicting and be like, Oh, well this can't be helpful because these things are opposite. And this must not be true, but I think when you really understand, you know, that, um, not only in human design, but in life sometimes too, opposing things can both be held at the same time. Um, it can be really useful to understand what's going on. Um, and when to apply what, when, right.

yeah because You know, I think One of the beneficial things about human design is that, is that aspect of like, permission. Because when you, we come into human design, you know, we come into life with like all kinds of stories about how things are and how things aren't.

my therapist prior to learning about human design. And so one of the tools that my therapist used in our work together is called dialectical behavioral therapy. Um, and it was developed, I know it's a mouthful, developed by this, um, therapist.

yeah, yeah, that's really interesting I think I might have to look up to that because I feel like yeah, I was definitely raised like You know, when one thing is, is the right thing and then had a complete crisis through my 20s of, um, of realizing perhaps that wasn't the case. And the more, you know, I developed that empathy muscle, the more that was sort of like cracked open. Uh,

For sure.

when I'm like in my worst states of mental health. Is when I'm like really fixated on one thing

Good, bad, black, white. I agree. Yeah, I can totally relate to that for sure. So should we just jump in?

Yeah, I feel like that's a really good yeah way to start it off because it's like Don't that I guess the message we're trying to share is like don't see This when it comes up in your design when something comes up in your design. Don't see it as As a bad thing in fact see it as as yeah, there's like another way of permission of two things being Um, true. So yeah, where, where, were you looking? What in your, because we're going to talk about our own designs.

I mean, I think that like, you know, when we Always introduce human design. We always start off, start off with type and, you know, Kyle, we're both projectors. And so, you know, some, one of the things that I noticed just about being a projector, sometimes it can be, have its own dichotomy in and of itself without even looking at any other part of the chart, because as a projector, we're, we're meant to. You know, guide and lead others.

ha ha ha ha.

energetic invitation or, you know, explicit verbal invitation that is there so that we can ensure that our guidance is appreciated and received and. Sometimes that in and of itself is hard.

Yeah, absolutely. Um, yeah, like, so for you, is there an example that pops up? Um,

Oh my gosh, I mean, it's just like, this reoccurring theme, I think every projector can relate to this, of seeing how things can be fixed or made better, and saying it, and having it fall on full circle. Ears and, or, you know, and it just like not being well received and then just becoming super pissy and bitter about it. Like whether it's in the workplace Or you know giving advice to a friend or a family member where you're just like if you just did this Your problem would go away

yeah, like, and especially I imagine with your fifth line, you know, really being able to see. And that people do actually come to you to have their problems fixed, but don't actually want to fix their problems. So you end up

Oh my gosh

like a dumping ground for people's problems. Yep,

you know People project that you can solve their problems But sometimes it's like not the problem that I want to fix and I'm like, you actually have this whole other problem. Let me help you solve that. And they're like, no, but like, it's like, you know, like a great example of that would be, you know, a single person talking about dating. Right. And they're like, you know, I'm actually having a problem.

yeah, absolutely. Um, uh, again, when I was looking at my design for things, uh, like I also have. This channel, the 2551, which is the channel of initiation, but I'm a projector.

Yep.

So here I am here to like initiate things and yet, which is like a very manifestor thing and yet, I'm a projector, so I'm waiting for like the invitation. So that's been interesting too. And so to look at like, I guess the wisdom that's come out of that. It's like Inside those circles where I have been invited in, that is where I'm here to then initiate things.

you know, kind of jumping to like having a fifth line, you know, fifth line, like I said, that's like, if you have a five in your profile, you're meant to be a problem solver. But oftentimes people project what that problem is to solve. And so then it's about using my authority to then decide, is that a problem I want to solve? Is that something I'm excited to solve? And, and leaning into that part instead of just being like, Oh, I'm a projector.

Yeah.

like,

And this would be a good one because, you know, there's, there is quite a few people out there with the. The two, four profile, like myself, um, so we did the episode on profiles, but the two is the hermit and the four is, well, the opportunist, I call it like the connector. So one is very like inwards focus, the hermit, which is all about like bring your own, like spending time with yourself and really letting your like innate genius shine. So it's, it is kind of like.

You're just flooded.

yeah, yeah. So it's like, and then that's usually a sign of like needing to go to the other way, but it's really tricky because, um,

It's a very fine balance, right? It's like, it's, you know, the, the saying that the straw that broke the camel's back. It's like, it's literally like one piece of straw that like flips over the table. And I think there's a lot of similarities in that 2 4 line as there is for both of us being projectors and having collaborative definitions.

Yeah, I made a note with that as well. Hahaha.

Yeah, so it's like,

that profile, yeah.

you know, like as projectors, like we value alone time, we need time downtime to rest and to be in our own energy and like connect back to ourselves. But having a collaborative definition and remember like our definition is how we process. And it's a tool that when we're stuck, if we can really lean into our definition, it can really help. Get things moving again.

Yeah. Yep. Yeah I think for any non sacral with that, um, and even for sacral beings with that, cause there's, I know people who are quite sacral who still need that alone time as well. So yeah, so I think that that is the big thing of it is it's a you know, we like to slap the label of like introverted and extroverted on people.

had someone once, like, I had someone once explain it to me as, you know, an introvert is somebody that gets drained by spending time with people. An extrovert is somebody that needs energy spending time with people. And then I'm like, but what

ha

right? Like. Yeah. Yeah.

people. Yeah. And then, and then it, so for me, it just depends. Like if I'm in my hermit phase, being around people drains me. If I'm in my connector phase, being around people gives me energy. The good thing is, at least with these, is that I've noticed they like tend to last like a few weeks each way. So there's like enough time to like recalibrate. Uh, but yeah, then it's like really hard when you, when you end up with a week that, um, so I, so this is still something I'm working out.

Well, I think that even, you know, and this is something, you know, again, both of us have this next one that I'm kind of looking at that's similar around having energy, but also needing rest. So it's like you and I, again, both have open sacral centers or undefined sacral centers. And then we both have motor centers that are defined. So, you know, motor centers are centers that like we generate energy for.

Yep. Yeah, whereas, like, if we had that sake rule, it would probably be a little bit clearer because basically as long as We're staying on something that we feel lit up and excited about. We can just like, keep going and it's healthy for us to like, keep going all the way till we we flop into bed. Um, yeah, this one's the, the thing that came up for me around this was that I also have another channel off my ego center, which is like the channel of marketing around this.

Like repulsion towards it?

yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I used to work in, um, in an, in an AV store. So like selling TVs and things like that and people would come in and in general, they wanted to buy the biggest TV possible for the cheapest price. Like, especially when

Right.

events run, because especially men, Wanted to have a bigger tv than their mates had Um, because their mates were coming over and they can then show on this giant

What do you think that's about?

Let's dive

Mine's bigger than yours.

so yeah, so

That's another, a whole other episode.

And but and I I hate it like it was it was an easy sale right because they're coming in They're pretty much they're gonna buy something And I just struggled so much to sell them these like really cheap low quality You TVs where, like, to me, the picture looked terrible and, um, and, you know, this, of course, makes me a terrible salesman, right? Because I'm not, I'm not serving the customer. But for me, it was like, look, buy this

are, though,

bit

in a different way. Like,

It will last you a lot longer. So you won't need to be like upgrading it so soon, uh, or replacing it. Um, you know, it comes with a big warranty, so you don't have to like, you know, pay extra for the, and yeah. So if, you know, if I had just been out, I'd just be like, all right, I'll just sell you whatever. But because, um, my heart wasn't in it. Yeah, I spent my whole time trying to talk him into, like, a different TV. Uh, and that was probably really annoying for them.

you know what? But you know what, I bet you, you had a lower instances of returns.

true. Yeah, I didn't get, yeah. Yeah, that's true. Yeah.

I'm like coming from somebody that is lead salespeople. I'm like, I'm like, you have low returns. So you're better on the, on the bottom line, sir. That's

Yeah, so That That uh, yeah, that's then another like dichotomy in my design

The moral of the story is buy a TV from Kyle. He wants to hear you out.

no, there's too many there's too many different things with tvs now all these new technologies and letters and things Um, was there anything else on like on your chart that was like that stood out

You know, I think that one of the things that I looked at was a lot of the gates that I have defined in my. In my brain, in my emotions, in my head, you know, those are all places where we have, we hold fears. Right. And so when I look at the fears that those gates are, some of them are pretty contradictory to parts of my chart, parts of my design. So, you know, like one of the major ones that I looked at was.

Mm

or like, you know, you have to challenge authority sometimes, like when you're in a leadership role, when you're guiding others, you're responsible for a group of other people. And so at times it leads you having to butt up against something. And, you know, when that shows up, it's like, I'm meant to, like, guide people forward and not let a fear of doing what's best for them by challenging like a system or a process that's already in place.

Mm

or a process and it's reminding myself, like, that's not the place I meant to make my decision from. I meant to use my authority and wait to wait for that emotional clarity to come to choose to move forward. So, usually it's like, when that fear is coming up, it's like. You're not the boss of me. Thanks. Thanks for showing up, but you're, you know, you're not here to be in charge. Um, so that was one. And then, you know, another gate that I have in my chart actually carry this whole channel.

Mm hmm. Yeah. What the um, What's that saying? You know, the cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek? So that's, that's a good one for, um, for you.

Yeah, that is a good one for me.

Yeah, that's tough

And yeah, the only, or the only way out is through, right?

yeah, yeah, the fear gate, these, yeah, gates around your fears, they can be very, like, noisy. So, um, that's, and when I have the mindfulness to notice it, It's like, oh, the noise when it's, when my mind is being very noisy, that's a sign not to listen to it because it is probably just like fear speaking.

Yeah. Like, and you know, and those are just two. I have quite a few. How about you? What are some other things that like, you've noticed?

I thought about the, um, the variables, which we haven't really talked about, but like on your chart, there's, um, arrows near your head. There's two on the left and two on the right. Uh, and then in generally speaking, if your arrows are mostly pointing right, then you're sort of a bit more go with the flow type personally, and that's how you operate best. But if your arrows are kind of mostly pointing left, then a bit more rigidity and like structure is helpful.

Oh yeah.

And it's like, uh, how does this work? So, like, for me, like, the two on the, on the left are pointing left and the two on the right are pointing right. Um, So that's been interesting one too, to then like dive into each of those and yeah, find those nuances of like, okay, so in these areas, it's helpful for me to have this structure and in these areas it's helpful for me to have a bit more like go with the flow.

flow.

Yeah.

Yeah. And, and, you know, that's something that you and I have in common in terms of like, for example, like our bottom left arrow is pointing left. And that one typically goes towards like movement of your body. And so when it's like pointing left, like you mentioned, We like a little bit more structure in our movement, but at the same time, we're both projectors, and we both have open root centers.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, the um, and especially having like, because then I've got the splenic as well, and so I have even had like, people say, and you know, that's the thing when you're not looking at someone's specific chart, you can end up giving sort of these general advice that, ah, you know, you should just move your body when you feel like, when you get the intuitive hit to do so.

Yes.

so yeah, so I need to have like a workout program that I'm working through, but I am much better these days at modifying that workout to meet my needs of the day, which I think, so there's that nuance. Um,

the way that I kind of manage that for myself is like, I know that I need to move, but what that movement looks like might differ. And it's like, as long as I do something. So sometimes that might be like something, like something that's like really strength based and like crazy sweaty, but like. Most of the time, it's something, like, way more gentle and, like, relaxing and, like, nourishing to my nervous system.

yeah. Oh, yeah, totally. Yeah, that's, that's uh, I hate when I see, like, slogans like that on, like, gym walls and stuff like that. It's the reason I, like, can't be on Instagram anymore because I follow too many, like, fitness people and Yeah.

what the mute button was for.

That's what the delete app button is for.

Yeah, I know.

Uh, so, um, you know, I mean, this is, I hadn't intended to mention this, but this is the to toot our own horns a bit. Like this is where if you're going through this human design stuff, like having a proper rating can be really helpful because.

Yeah. And it's so useful when you're able to have a conversation with somebody and not only just discuss how it shows up on your chart and say, Oh, these are how these two, these nuanced pieces work together. It's actually about. What does your life look like? And let's talk about how that shows up in your life, which I think is like, that's really the unlock.

Yeah, yeah.

Sure. It's how it shows up in your chart, but like more important, like, what does it look like when I'm walking around in the world? Every day.

Yeah, absolutely, yeah, being able to

Cause those conversations are easier to have, right? When we're sitting here looking at a camera on our computer and like, we have to take those lessons out into like the rest of our day

mm hmm, yes, alright, well, we might wrap it up there, um, and if you would like to book a reading with Brandy or I, I'll include um, notes, uh, in the show notes, so you can just expand that below on, on how you can get in touch with one of us, or both of us, um, as we Have talked about doing dual readings as well. So that'd be that'd be fun All right anything else to add brandy

now, but I'm really excited to continue having more conversations, you know, in the future about kind of how we're navigating our own designs and like how it shows up in our life.

Yeah, I think yeah, we were talking about that just before the podcast before we hit record that that would be a fun thing to do and I think Yeah, I always find that helpful like It's like okay. Well, great. You give me all this information. That's good. But how are you actually? Implementing it it's always like really helpful Cool.

Yeah, good stuff. All right. Well, we'll talk soon.

everyone.