Things sure have come a long way in the Disney "animals trying to get home" subgenre of films. From silent animals being narrated over, to standard voice-over work, to BEVERLY HILLS CHIHUAHUA where CGI has advanced enough to make their mouths move. But through all the technilogical advancements, the song remains the same - beloved pet needs to get home, embarks on an incredible journey, and maybe learns something along the way. It's a tried-and-true formula, and this version is no different - th...
Jun 30, 2022•55 min
Don't get confused by the title of this week's film, D-Lovers, we aren't watching the Elton John biopic from a few years ago. And if you look at a plot synopsis, don't get turned around and think we're watching a movie inspired by a certain billionaire who's a bit fixated on traveling to Mars. No, Disney's ROCKETMAN is...let's say a lot more lowbrow than that.
Jun 23, 2022•56 min
This week's film follows a grizzly bear who starts out small and gets progressively bigger, while pushing down trees and terrorizing a cattle ranch. Does that sound like enough to earn this animal the title of KING OF THE GRIZZLIES? Not according to the bracket our hosts do at the end of this episode to determine the best Disney bear.
Jun 16, 2022•54 min
The word 'odd' is doing a lot of heavy lifting in the title of Disney's THE ODD LIFE OF TIMOTHY GREEN. Because while the title character may have some odd quirks about him, he exists within one of the most bizarre movies our hosts have seen so far. Or maybe it's that there's probably no three people less qualified to watch a film that is largely about a couple's desperate desire to have a child....Actually no, it's definitely the movie that is strange beyond belief.
Jun 09, 2022•1 hr 14 min
Not gonna lie, D-Lovers. After the last couple years, the idea of hitting an emergency eject button on your life, winding up on a deserted tropical paradise, and finding a chimp friend to hang out with doesn't sound all that bad. Then again, if a young woman with a heck of a spear-throwing arm and some serious daddy issues were to show up, it might put a damper on things - so maybe not the best idea. Not unlike Disney's LT. ROBIN CRUSOE, U.S.N., even if the idea came from Daddy Walt himself....
Jun 02, 2022•58 min
We've seen animals get put through all kinds of distressing scenarios in the name of Disney entertainment over the years, but forcing a tiger to run through a field of explosives to simulate mortar fire wasn't what any of our hosts ever expected to see. Still, A TIGER WALKS is an intriguing viewing experience, given it plays very much like a horror movie and/or Jaws for about half its runtime, before the children start singing at least.
May 26, 2022•54 min
In 1913, twenty year-old amateur golfer Francis Ouimet upset all expectations by defeating a number of professional players and champions at the U.S. Open. Was it, as Disney claims in this film, THE GREATEST GAME EVER PLAYED? Or is this the most blatant case of false advertising since The Neverending Story? It may depend on which of our hosts you ask as some have respect and admiration for the game of golf and others....not so much.
May 19, 2022•1 hr 1 min
Here we are again, D-Lovers. For the third time we're going to the jungle to enjoy the adventures of young Mowgli and his furry friends. Only this time, the animals are real, Mowgli is nigh-on 30 years old, and basically Disney's 1994 version of THE JUNGLE BOOK has nothing to do with the Jungle Book. That said, as a Tarzan story, or just some other generic "man raised in the wild tries to re-enter society" story - not too shabby! Just, maybe don't let your younger kids watch it without you, unle...
May 12, 2022•1 hr 8 min
Put on your detective hats and your Sunday finest/funeral attire to wear to court, because we have a mystery to solve and justice to render. Disney's RIDE A WILD PONY begs the question - is it possible that a pony could have been in the possession of two different children at two different times? And, more importantly, should the pony go to the poor child with behavioural issues who can't get to school without it, or the willful but wheelchair-bound rich girl whose family already owns a lot of o...
May 05, 2022•1 hr 1 min
It's our 350th episode! So of course our hosts had to do something special for you, and nothing marks a milestone like talking about the Disney movie with the worst parents ever. Yes, we're finally talking about THE PARENT TRAP FROZEN! Arguably Disney's biggest animated hit of the last twenty years that continues to resonate with children/torture parents to this day, listen to find out how well it lands for three childless millenials.
Apr 28, 2022•1 hr 19 min
Every so often our hosts get a harsh reminder that the film studio that brought us movies like Beauty and the Beast and Remember the Titans also made movies like Song of the South and One of Our Dinosaurs is Missing. Disney's SMITH! is one such reminder. An egregiously racist film to its very core on almost every conceivable level, this one left our hosts reeling if not at a total loss for words. So much so that eventually all pretense is abandoned as we resort to talking about twenty-five year ...
Apr 21, 2022•1 hr 5 min
What defines greatness? Is it about helping others be their best? Is it about the ability to outrun a cheetah? How about a gift for physical comedy? If none of those seem quite right, then we've got bad news for you about THE WORLD'S GREATEST ATHLETE, because that would imply there's nothing particularly great about it. And if that's the case, why would Disney make such a fil- wait, hold on, says here it came out in 1973, now it all makes sense.
Apr 14, 2022•1 hr 4 min
So you're having a bad day. You're taking one down. You sing a sad song just to turn it around. But we all know that never works, so might we suggest watching ALEXANDER AND THE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY instead? Because, honestly, it's a pretty sweet little Disney film with more than one or two solid laughs that also imparts a lesson on how to deal with those days that just plain suck. Plus, some great cameos AND two great comedic performances from Steve Carell and Jennifer Garne...
Apr 07, 2022•1 hr 4 min
If we've told you once, we've told you a thousand times: if someone invites you onto a boat, unless you are prepared for the possibility of ending up on the water far away from land, do not get on that boat! It's a lesson young James MacArthur would have been better off remembering in the Disney movie KIDNAPPED. Maybe then the movie would have stayed being about a nephew and his batty uncle trying to kill each other over a decrepit caste instead of being a sort of lesser, more Scottish version o...
Mar 31, 2022•57 min
Usually it's not too difficult to get onside with a Disney sports movie. They are almost always a plucky underdog story with manipulative scores, and really what's not to like about that? And GLORY ROAD even bears some resemblance to one of our favourite Disney football movies you may remember, a real titan of a movie. But the reality is, those movies shouldn't even be uttered in the same setence if we're comparing their relative quality. Cause this movie tries, but unlike the NCAA basketball te...
Mar 24, 2022•56 min
This week, with great reluctance, our hosts invite you to MEET THE DEEDLES. What's a Deedle, you ask? Good question. It's a behind-the-times archetypical character of a dumb/slacker comedy. It's a lame, over-the-top, annoying, adult truant. It's, sadly, one of Paul Walker's first film roles, before he became fast and/or furious. Our hosts had the meet the Deedles and now you do too - but we bet you'll wish you deedlen't.
Mar 17, 2022•52 min
It is with misty eyes and heavy hearts that we bid a fond farewell to one of Disney's biggest leading men. That's right, with THE HORSE IN THE GRAY FLANNEL SUIT our hosts have completed the gauntlet of Dean Jones movies, and what a wild ride it has been. Though surprisingly there's not really a wild ride in this movie - more like silently intense and practiced horse jumping.
Mar 03, 2022•1 hr 3 min
Everyone knows that Disney's "Dark Age" was from around 1970-1988, but if we may be so bold we'd like to posit that a second, shorter, animation-specific Dark Age took place roughly around the first decade of the 2000s. Because woof, the movies we've been seeing from that decade are decidedly not great, and BOLT is no exception. While not without its charms (mostly fat hamster related), a movie with lifeless lead character going on a low-stakes journey is hard to get behind - despite our hosts' ...
Feb 24, 2022•58 min
Fun fact about this week's movie: THE LITTLEST HORSE THIEVES was it's title in North America, drawing on the fun caper of three little ragamuffin children liberating some cute ponies in hopes of taking them to some sort of pony paradise. Meanwhile, in the UK where the film is also set, Disney released it as ESCAPE FROM THE DARK, drawing on the harrowing climax of the film where a group of coal miners are trapped underground and surrounded by poisonous gases. Two titles, but the same movie. How d...
Feb 17, 2022•1 hr
As you may know, dear listener, we don't do Pixar movies on the podcast. But we do talk about Disney-released spinoffs from Pixar movies. Which of course means it was only a matter of time before we got to PLANES, the Cars-adjacent franchise that mostly exists to sell toys. But you may also know that a film set in a world populated entirely by living vehicles is going to capture our hosts' imaginations in a very specific way. So strap in, D-Lovers, this one is a wild ride.
Feb 10, 2022•1 hr 1 min
It's the last of the Disney TV shows that got their own theatrically released movies, and we saved the most grostesque for last. TEACHER'S PET features big Nathan Lane energy as a dog who desperately wants to be a boy, an insanely stacked voice cast, and just about the ugliest animation our hosts have ever seen.
Feb 03, 2022•1 hr 1 min
It's remarkable that, after watching enough Disney movies from the 1960s, it stops mattering how unique or strange a premise is. Take MONKEYS, GO HOME! A movie that begins with Dean Jones moving to Provence, France and turns into a movie about undercutting wages for the local olive-harvesting workers and replacing them with slave labour via four chimpanzees. A bizarre premise by any definition, yet at this stage our hosts barely bat an eye.
Jan 27, 2022•56 min
Our hosts certainly aren't above jumping on the latest trends, so get ready to talk about Bruno, cause it's ENCANTO week. The latest Disney animated feature that is tearing up the soundtrack charts, capturing hearts and minds, and making you feel extremely sad when a house falls down. The songs will get stuck in your head, the arepas will make your stomachs rumble, and the family drama will be frustrating - but the experience will be memorable.
Jan 20, 2022•1 hr 24 min
Y'all know that our hosts are all big fans of Jed. You know, the dog performer from classics such as The Journey of Natty Gann and White Fang? So it's sad to say that his final performance was in the...let's say lackluster Disney sequel WHITE FANG 2: MYTH OF THE WHITE WOLF. The most we can say about it is that at least it looks like a relatively easy time for ol' Jed, cause despite being the title character, the good boy ain't really even in this one all that much. And Alfred Molina aside, what ...
Jan 13, 2022•59 min
It's a rollicking river adventure this week as we watch the latest Disney movie to be based on a theme park ride, JUNGLE CRUISE. It's hard not to have at least a bit of a good time with this film, given how much it begs, borrows and steals from other beloved classics in the action-adventure genre, but it's got plenty to recommend itself on it's own! Like...Paul Giamatti and Jesse Plemons doing broad accents, Jack Whitehall playing his own father, and...um...The Rock wearing a cute lil' hat?...
Jan 06, 2022•1 hr 10 min
How do you solve the problem of wanting to make an origin story for a villain whose only trait is a homicidal urge to murder animals and wear their skins? Well, if you're Disney, it's rather simple: cast Emma Stone, give her a tragic backstory, and then (and here's the important part) completely abandon any intention of having her turn into a puppy-strangling maniac. This CRUELLA may not be destined to become the iconic villain from the original animated classic, but there's still plenty to unpa...
Dec 30, 2021•1 hr
Bob and Margaret is an adult animated television series created by David Fine and Alison Snowden. The show revolved around a married English couple named Bob and Margaret Fish, a middle class 40-ish working couple with no children and two dogs. Bob is a dentist and Margaret is a chiropodist. Bob and Margaret struggle with everyday issues and mid-life crises. Stories often revolve around the mundane, but in a way which is eminently relatable. From the trials of shopping to dealing with friends wh...
Dec 23, 2021•57 min
In the pantheon of Disney Channel Original Movie icons, Galleria, Chanel, Aqua and Do may just be their own Mount Rushmore. And it's easy to see why; THE CHEETAH GIRLS is an earnest story of friendship, self-acceptance and conflict resolution that stands up with even the best episodes of Degrassi: The Next Generation. It also has some wild examples of teen slang, awful early 2000s fashion and we're not entirely convinced Raven-Symoné didn't throw a bichon frise down a sinkhole for attention....
Dec 16, 2021•1 hr 12 min
When you think about it, Disney has a pretty decent track record with adventure movies. So THE ISLAND AT THE TOP OF THE WORLD could have been a welcome reprieve from the usual 70s fare of films about dogs and old people. Could have been, but wasn't. Instead, it's a surprisingly dull affair, thanks to an uninteresting plot, and even more uninteresting characters.
Dec 09, 2021•54 min
Much like the miracle substance itself, FLUBBER is a Disney movie that seems to defy understanding. In most ways, it's a surprisingly faithful remake (to its own detriment) of the 1961 Fred MacMurray vehicle it's based on. But it's in the small changes where the insanity happens. A flying robot in love with her creator, henchmen played by serial killer Buffalo Bill and the hardest screw to ever walk a turn in Shawshank prison, and Christopher McDonald - Shooter McGavin himself - delivering what ...
Dec 02, 2021•1 hr
