This is a Wait Don't Do It podcast with your girl Nunu Paris and Rafi. Make sure to join us monthly at El Rey for Reggaeton Brunch. You can follow at Reggaeton Brunch DC for more details. We'll see you there, baby sotas. Mwah. Hi, beautiful. Oh, my gosh, we're back. It's video. It's here. Can you believe it that finally the season is back with video, no less? I mean, you are breathtaking.
I just, that's why I had to, like, encourage us to do at least one video audio experience for our listeners, because everyone needs to experience the beauty that is behind the camera with New New Paris. It's just amazing. Likewise, with all this. Radiant energy from our hostess with the most says Raffi. It's still my favorite host reggaeton brunch all also the beautiful
also the beautiful Beautiful. Yeah, do you get caught handsome by all the guys you go on dates with I would say I definitely get told that they like aspects of my face handsome I feel like I feel like I've never called someone handsome. I've always called someone cute. Like, so you're on apps and y 'all like, how y 'all flirting? Like, you're like, hey handsome. Yeah, I got hey handsome a lot, which makes me feel like I'm getting older. Because on Grindr, it's been
hey handsome. As someone who used to be the hey handsome military gun shooter, I will say it throws me off a little bit because I'm like, oh, wow, I'm definitely leaning in more to daddy territory. Um, so yeah, those kind of like in person no one's ever been like, oh my god, you're so handsome I feel like it's more like cutie patootie or like cutie or stuff like that And
y 'all know out there like it's it's me. So y 'all know i'm trans. Um, so like It would take me out and i'm not gonna lie like I feel like there hasn't been a single point in my life where I feel like handsome You've never been called handsome, really? Even when you were trained, like, beard? It has always felt cringey to me. Like, I don't know why. It just has felt cringey as a boy. No, but you would definitely be called handsome if you were fully cis. Like, if you
leaned, like... Okay, well, you're not gonna do drag for the next month, you said. So when you get your beard back, you would fall in the category of handsome. I want you to understand. First of all, you could be handsome and cut.
but like handsome because like let's talk about it if you're a masculine presenting person but you are very like I guess like feeling that femininity inside you want to be referred to as beautiful are you beautiful I mean you technically can be beautiful beautiful there's a to me there's a way to me is beautiful sounds very like Feminine, but I've called boys beautiful, too. Boys are beautiful, but only at their bottom. Just kidding.
Just kidding. If y 'all could not tell, we're talking about boys, but really like dating, right? We're telling y 'all what not to do when it comes to dating, the talking stage, all of that in the city. We have some amazing guests from this cool social app called InPress, which is really changing the scene of DC dating. And this was like important to us because we're outside, you know what I'm saying? Like, and we see how... Not only just for straight people. I'm not gonna
talk about the straight people right now. I'm talking about just for the queer dating diva. It's crazy, right, Rafi? I mean, NuNu's been locked in for almost a decade now. So I have experienced the rawness of EC dating. It's trenches for sure. You know, comparatively, I think DC is worse, worse than my college experience with dating in a lot of ways. I feel like in North Carolina, people were willing to get married and that's like the goal. Here, the career is
the goal. So I feel like it's twice. Right, right. Yeah, dating sucks, but I am a user on Impress and there's just a lot of aspects of it that I do appreciate. They kind of like take off the pressure of... Starting that first conversation
because I am not good at flirting. I'm good at flirting in the moment I am not good at flirting If I'm caught off guard or about to initiate it I have to really like feel chemistry with you to flirt and I've never I've never felt flirtiness Through a text like I struggle with that so hard But I love a texture that knows how to text very funny very witty very very flirty. I love that but I'm usually like the person that's just like, you know, okay, what are we doing? Where are
we going? Great. Can't wait to see you. I love flirty texting. You know, I, trust me, you love flirty arguing. You like flirty meetings. You like flirty interviews. Oh, no, no, yeah. Nudu is a flirt. Nudu is a flirt. Nudu is a flirt. She loves a man. If there's something that's Nudu gonna do, it's flirt. Because it's so fun. I think flirty is harmless, but I think it's definitely fly and just, you know, you know, just... pressing those buttons, saying those
more cheeky words with people. I think it's just something interesting to do. I've seen Nunu flirt as a boy and a girl, and both experiences are highly entertaining, I highly suggest you do. Because she is on a mission. She is on a... And like I said, I'm single, and I've never been on a mission before. And this bitch... Well, now you know why you're single. Y 'all, because I want y 'all to know... Because... Y 'all have
to want it. I think dating at the end of days about wanting it and you really do I really agree with that It's just like such a struggle sometimes because y 'all don't want it like you have to like Want to know and get the person and I'm talking to a person or play with a person I'm like, I want to see if I can get them to like a level that you know, oh, are you fucking no more you flirting with them? Underbelly like they're that raw I just want to see, like, what
they're made out of. I want to see that real raw human. Because the truth is... Stay wise, bitch. It's for sport, for me. I'm not gonna lie. Because I don't give a fuck about these people. Because usually those people, when you get to that other side, they're broken, they're terrible. They have all these things that are with them. But I just want to get there and say I did it. Like, I could get you. I am a demisexual though. I love like wine and dine me before.
Okay, cuz Demi Lovato was that bitch. Camp Rock! I still wear my Converse. No, I love a good conversation before. I hated just like coming over and like going straight to it unless there's been an established relationship before that. But I've never been the person to invite someone over and not just wanna like sit down and gauge the situation first. And I will say it saved me from a lot of bad experiences. Like I explained, like in this interview, I talked about that guy that told me, oh, I'm
not into music. Girl, how are you not into music? That is such a red flag to me because A, you have no rhythm. B, it was such an insight to see that person didn't like music. They were like a math major. So they were like. We just, there was nothing that was like common ground for us to like have fun to. So there's nothing common ground in our sexual chemistry, you know? So I definitely think like, starting the conversation off first is very important. So does that mean
you're a demisexual? I know that something that's really attractive to me is like definitely money. They give you trick in. She's a sugar sexual bitch. Because if you spin it then like, you know. Obviously, you're interested, right? Nunu. Where are my girls at? Where are my girls at? That's what I wanted to know. I think that several people out there would relate. And like I said, I think there is an energy source of someone that wants to be... You like to be a good girl
when it comes to that stuff. Like, Rafi loves, I want y 'all to know, Rafi loves a regular ass person. Like, all that blue collar, white collar, whatever that, you know, whoever you are, background, Rafi loves that, y 'all. Like, Rafi does not discriminate. I love that. I love that heart. I love that, you know, blah, blah, blah. I'm not that girl. You didn't say anything positive in that past statement. No, it was positive. Like, you like regular people. You like every...
That's crazy. I'm not saying you don't have standards. I'm just saying, like, if a dude was a waiter, you'd be okay. If a dude was a waiter, you'd be okay. If a dude was a celebrity, you'd be okay. You'd be okay. It's not about what the dude's doing. Oh, so you wouldn't date a waiter? Hell no. It is not even, like, shading the waiter. It's just, like, I have a lifestyle and a certain thing I like to... I have to live, unfortunately.
You are here. And I could imagine... Nunu does live in, like, the deepest delusional world I watch out of now, right now. Because there are waiters that live like Nunu does. He wants to really... Absolutely. Absolutely. And, you know, if that waiter had a trust fund, absolutely. Come on. but I just can't be waiting alone. That's what I'm saying. No, I mean, I definitely am open to just like a good person for sure. But you know, if there was a truck driver right now,
Raph would be on him, honey. Oh, I love a truck driver. Make him good money. I love a blue collar man. Fix the house. Fix the house, please. Because I'm not going to be able to do any of that. And I will never, no shame. But no, it's a great episode, y 'all. I'm really excited about this interview. We had a great time winning for us. Adam and Christina. Loved so many funny moments. Stay tuned for a messy little game to find out what's a green flag, what's a red flag, and what
is a beige flag. Are you doing some of these red flags? Are you guilty? Nunu's definitely guilty of some of them. And Adam's definitely my green flag. Enjoy the episode. Impress is a news -based dating and friendship app that matches users based on shared intellectual interests revealed through engagement with curated factual journalism. It avoids superficial swiping and generic prompts by focusing on subconscious interests.
It offers dating and friendship mode. involving compatibility metrics and a gamified news engagement system called InScore Levels is currently available in DC and NYC. And today we are joined by the CEO and co -founder of the product lead, Adam and Christine. How are y 'all? I'm so good. Thank you for having us. We are so happy to be here with y 'all. I mean, I've been on Impress for a couple of weeks now. I still have similar opinions
on DC dating, but we can definitely... Sorry, we can change the entire diaspora of DC dating in a few weeks. We're trying our best. No, but I cannot wait to really get into this issue with other people that have experienced dating in DC, but in other cities as well. Because I think that people... I think DC really individualizes itself in the dating scene, but I feel like dating sucks everywhere. But of course, we're going to get into that today. Nunu, how are you doing?
I'm doing amazing, Raffi. I think being in a big city, right, has its own unique challenges. And I think that's the perfect reason why Impress exists. So we have to get into the dating scene starting all the way from the beginning, all right, Adam and Christina? We're gonna go right to the talking stage. How does Impress work with this idea of the talking stage, like the very beginning of just trying to date in the city?
Yeah, well, we found that, and you guys can correct us if you've experienced this yourselves or haven't experienced this yourselves, but we found that on dating apps, maybe breaking the ice can be a bit awkward, right? Because you basically swiped right into the ether, hoping that someone found you interesting or attractive enough to swipe right on you. I think you just kind of wait, right? Whereas what we're doing is we're basically identifying your weirdest and most wonderful
subconscious interests. I'm finding out how you're compatible with others to show you that information up front hopefully giving people enough to do you see unfakable interest where they can break the ice more easily so showing them that they both like the same band or the same food or who knows the same you know. weird piece of art. The more you use it, the weirder it gets. And I like to tell people, if it's weirder, it's better, right? Because who wants the boring insights?
We want to know the juicy stuff. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Love that you said that, not faking the idea. Because that's kind of what the talking stage is about, right? Like, thinking about how can I present myself in the best possible package. I love pretending to be a human being. I'm a Gemini, so I just, like, patter myself after whoever I'm around. Oh, you too, see? We could
actually just take our call elsewhere. This is a call divided I can tell this could be a messy conversation already I think the question is, has dating always been this bad? Because people always blame dating apps. Do you guys think that dating has always been this challenging, or has technology really changed the game for us? Yeah, that's really interesting, because I think dating apps really came about in the 2013, 2014 era.
And this was, frankly, when I was coming into college, and so I didn't have a ton of dating app experiences, so I can't talk about before
that. But I do think throughout the years of like Hinge and Tinder and Bumble like all these different apps that are coming out people are just getting more and more shallow as time goes on and the options like the variety of options like people are just not settling down there's a million dates like I know people like stack updates like back -to -back, you know or like multiple times a week. So I think it's just a
lot to handle. And unfortunately, we're not having this human connection as much anymore, especially after the pandemic, too. Let's add another layer to that, you know? Yeah. I get the multiple dates. You gotta get those free meals. I was like, this is how I ate for free for a whole month. And it was like, date, date, date. I was like, that's crazy. Literally. I actually love it with your hair down here, because it's... I personally am in a relationship, right? I've been in a long
-term relationship. I'm going on nine years. And I met my partner on Tinder. So I spent two years prior on dating apps, trying all these things. And so now, you know, in the recent times, I have coworkers, right? I'm looking at their hinge and their Tinder. And you're right, Christina. The whole landscape has changed. And I'm like, how do you get past the talking stage? Because all these apps are just like, this is what I
would do for a fun date or... Was the last time you've done this random thing and anybody but your impressed app is trying to take that that little middleman away Yeah, yeah contacts. Yeah, go ahead. That's exactly right. I mean literally took words out of my that's all it was we are trying to build How do I say this we project on social media right project on dating apps? Everyone wants to make it look how hot they are and how clever they can be in a one -liner Bible
What does that really say about you, right? Like you can say anything whereas what we're trying to do is make it not just kind of trying to make it so that you can't really fake it, but you have a good time providing the data, in this case with news, for us to kind of build that profile about you that is unfakable. You're not just going to hand over this information if you're not seeing any immediate reward. You got to actually kind of make the journey fun, and in our case,
educational. And that's why we're doing this with all factual information. But people be lying. That's what this is about. No, that's what I really do appreciate about Impressed is that you kind of really are connected with because I start I forgot what tier I made it But I didn't make it to like the fourth tier. What's that? What's that call? I know I was really I was really swiping honey. I was like working. What's the tier? You gotta explain slow down for us Ruffy
beans. Oh, yeah. No, that's your ruffy catch it No, but you knew brought it up in her pitch in the beginning where the The more, well, I wake up every day and I like look through the articles. And as I do that, if I look at like three to four articles a day by like, I think like a second or fourth day, it told me I was what, an adventurer. So I definitely span, which I was like looking outside of my like normal
news context, like a lot of things. Like obviously I looked through a lot of events stuff, which is... still what I look through. But I think I was reading about like, you know, how much would you weigh on this planet? Kind of articles too. And so I really like that. So I think now I'm what? What was level three, level four? You went from being an explorer to a thinker. Ruffy's officially a thinker. Oh, you heard it here first. Breaking news, honey. I can have my brain cell
back. It just gets worse and worse because after this he graduates to an analyst, which gives him the power. Okay, okay. So yeah, there's goals here. But there's also the level, which I need to start getting into that side of more, which is the friends element. If you were on a dating app, what's the differences? How do you approach
different conversations? Because back in my day, when I was on the friends apps on the sides of the other apps, I feel like people were still trying to... I feel like it was more direct in certain ways. And so I'm curious to see how y 'all have experienced the friend side of dating apps. Christina, have you ever used Bubble BFF or anything? I actually haven't, no. And I have thought about it before, because I've moved into a couple of new cities, and each time it's a
little bit difficult to make new friends. I know friends who have had success with Bubble BFF, but I also know a lot of people who haven't. They go on one friend date, and then it just kind of links. doesn't go into anything. Yeah, I'm thinking about like, I know people I'm not going to say any names, but who have no no, I say this, you know, in DC, no, no, no less who had, you know, friend groups that were built all around bubble BFF and They were kind of weird
friends. I'm not going to lie. Like they weren't good for this person. They were like kind of just crazy. And it was just like, it wasn't like a healthy friend group to be around. And they all found each other there. And I think when I asked this person I'm very close with, how do they think that thought that had happened? They had said it was because they didn't really know. But again, same same thing, right? They really know much about each other. And I think
about these friends matching apps. where it's still an equally, if not more awkward, cold pitch to make to a friend. And I've put myself in the position of like the quintessential just like straight white dude here, right? Like what are the most awkward group of people in the world? No social skills. It's like, what do they do? Hey dude, you look cool. Wanna get like a beer? What is that? It's an icky thing. So like, how can we make it so that like the thing that's
gonna cut through that noise. for the friends and the dating is to just make it hyper personal. Like it's a lot easier pitch to be like, Oh, I don't know. You also like the same sports team. Like there's a game come up this week and you want to go watch it. It's just like, it's just more efficient. We are awkward people and dating apps are inherently awkward thing the way that they're popularized. So maybe you just got to make it more human, you know? Yeah. I think that's
what I've noticed. Cause I mean, to me, there's to a certain point like Instagram is also a dating app. If you look at the same kind of situations you just explained, where you are putting on a persona, you're putting something that other people, that you find other people would find attractive, and then you kind of riff off like those basic connections. And then also those quick tags on all those dating apps too. They kind of just like are quick slow lines on what...
you were interested in. But again, you probably just liked one thing one time. It's not like an in -depth reflection of everything. So I've definitely seen those things. So I will say, y 'all got me back on the dating apps. So that has definitely been confirmed. Yeah, you heard it here first. That's on the record. Right now, I'm editing that out in post. That's on the record. He's available, everyone. And looking, my question is, so we're in DC, right? And I know DC, we
all love it and kind of hate it sometimes. What are the obstacles you all found in dating in a city like... DC that, you know, was the reason we started this app. Like what are the kind of major pitfalls to getting a successful relationship that you all have seen? So, okay. How do I say this? I think when I first moved, DC was my first city living in America in like six years. So I didn't really, I wasn't familiar with dating in the American dating scene. Little did I realize
at the time. that it is not indicative of the rest of probably what it's like to date in America. So strange little atmosphere. Oh, it's crazy. You know, it's a transient city. Right. So I think like I think that inherently in the culture of dating in D .C., there is almost a more universal acceptance of transience in the communication and the consistency and the accountability. Right. Like like it's just kind of expected that I feel like probably the threshold and patience level
is higher for ghosting in D .C. than in most other places. Right. Like people are just like, oh, you know, it's moving. It's probably not going to work out anyway. Everyone's got the super professional secret job, probably traveling to frickin Qatar or something, right? Not going to see him for three months. Same thing. I felt like I felt like that was probably the main thing for me. Also, man, there's not that many. There's
not that many. All the scene restaurants that come out, there's just enough places for you to see all the same people. It's a big enough city. The thing is, it's the smallest city ever, but ghosting, like you said, is so common. And so you know you're gonna see that person out again. That's a messy moment. Have we ghosted someone before? Yeah, have y 'all ever ghosted someone? Oh, yeah, of course. That's a diva die. I'm like, you know what, yeah. No hesitation
there. I don't think I'll listen to anybody, but I'm sure someone will come out of the woodworks and be like, no, girl, you ghosted me. I don't know. Same. I would say the same thing. I'm like, first of all, I feel like I've ghosted people. I've never ghosted someone that I feel like is going to be hurt by me ghosting. I feel like I've always tried to finish that conversation. But then you also get the vibe that this person probably is on the third date right now today
also. And so ghosting. because it's just like y 'all completely just didn't find connection almost, you know? So I think people confuse those two. Yes, right. I think we're, like, generalizing ghosty a little bit much here, right? Like, I think Nunu and I are a little bit on the defensive right now. Right, is there... Like how best way to ghost someone? I feel like I'm in this day
and age with dating apps. And hopefully, I also think if you're on a dating app, hopefully you're emotionally mature enough to be a human and, like, have difficult conversations that you can just be like, hey, I had a great time. on our date, really didn't see a future here, wish you the best, let me know if I can hook you up with someone else in the future. That would be a better match. We all want to find love, and we all want to find connection, hopefully, so let's just
be real. Be FFR. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Nunu, did you ever go someone nine years ago? I'm ghosting? I'm probably getting in trouble, right? I don't think it means you're a bad person. I don't think it means you're trash. I think it's part of it. Like, yes, when I was on apps, I talked to people. I got to texting right away from app to texting. And then you kind of talk and then it just, eh, and then it's whatever. And... I don't feel like I defined it. I didn't feel like I was trying
to... Was ghosting a thing back then called ghosting? Back then, in the olden days, y 'all. I don't know why. I was feeling telegrams, the writing letters thing. Oh, my God. I saw your ad on the newspaper. Two cups and a string or something. So does Impress have anything built in to avoid ghosting or does it have prompts so that people
can talk more or just naturally engage? Yeah, so you know, it's funny, I actually, so we have a feature that we're developing right now, which I will touch on, but I just want to preface this
with, I didn't even think about this. I was prepping for this show that we actually have, I remember bringing this up to users in the past in the fall, like, hey, what would you think about like a, almost like a ghosting reporting function, and you're like, not like over time, it wouldn't be like one, like one time you're off the platform, but like after, you know, several, several recordings of this dude, just ghost people, or just ghost people, that they would get a warning or something.
And honestly, the users hated it. They didn't like that idea. They came back, they're like, that's not really... Too much accountability. Maybe if you... I think everything feels too Black Mirror -y or something. But something else that we've done, which is... Well, we've actually, at least designed it, we need to actually develop it into the app, you know, startup life, is basically
expiring conversations after 24 hours. If neither person responds, or if one person responds and the other person doesn't, that basically starts 24 -hour clock. So that's to kind of be shown a mutual interest of action. in order to actually keep it going. Otherwise, it just goes away. It un -muddies the platform, and you can just kind of clean your hands of it. I think that what that does is it kind of motivates action, too, right? If the clock's ticking, you can see
the clock ticking. Like, get on with it, you know? Yeah, I think Bumble, that's why I think a lot of women have told me that they like Bumble, is because it's on their terms in that kind of situation. Like, if you didn't feel it, honey, especially on Bumble... You'll be swiping on bubble and then you look at your matches and you're like, when did I swipe right? So it's good. Yeah. Get them, get rid of them as soon
as you like see them. That's great. Oh, speaking of like these like special features, is there any other ways or there's something built in impress where you're like encouraging that communication or something that's unique to impress that other apps don't have? Love that question. It's actually something that we are building right now. And this hasn't been released yet, but whatever we talk about, we talk about it to investors, so
I guess it's hot off the presses. It's not hot off the presses, it's not in your hand right now, but it will be soon, is we're basically building groups insofar as what Impress does is we can pretty much tell, based on how you think and feel about the world, if you're the most likely to be into something in the local area. Maybe it's DC United, maybe it's Break
a Tone Brunch. whatever it is shout out to ruffy right i'm sure ruffy would be in the top one percent of reggaeton in dc so he would get basically a prompt after he rates articles or even in his leads and it'll say, hey, Ralphie, guess what? You're in the top 1 % of reggaeton brats lovers in DC. Do you want to opt into this group for the next 72 hours? And so this group is always there, but you get access to it in basically
72 hour windows. And anytime there's an article or anything about, in this case, reggaeton or brunch, it gets automatically fed into that group to kind of keep the conversation going. And you can kind of like a WhatsApp group, almost like see who's in it. And my favorite part of this Is that this is a totally new take on pitching essentially in dating apps, which is every other dating app. You see someone you swipe, right?
You hope they swipe right on you. But in this case, you already are among this kind of essentially interest elite group in the local area. You've both opted into being there and you're actively engaged in the conversation. You can actually see who's in that group and send them a match across right there. Like if they have dating enabled, you can send them a dating request. They're friends enabled. You could send them a friend's request. And that doesn't have to
be geo locked. I mean, it could be, but you could, you know, you could set a request to anyone anywhere. if they share your love of reggaeton. And because it expires, like we said, after 72 hours, it kind of does motivate some more conversation and you can, it also keeps it fresh. It means that whoever's in that top of percent at any given time, you know? So yeah, that's kind of what we're thinking. And we think that'll definitely, the community has responded really well to that
idea. Cause I think they want to see the social aspect bolstered. Yeah, I love the social network aspect of it. Because I love being in a group chat. I love kind of adding my two cents in a group chat. So that's really cool. But I like that idea because it's like I can do it by... Not specifically geolocation, but, like, again, if I was interested in a brunch or a location or a space where I always visit, I can join that group and I'll be like, look, I can see you there.
I'm already going anyway. It kind of removes that pressure of, like, I got to be here to date, but if I'm already going, I can see you, so I have my normal plan. It makes it casual. Because I think DC, right, y 'all, definitely loves casual. Nothing but casual. I think the thing that really sets it apart is that you kind of have to earn the right to be there as well, right? So it's like... I almost feel like in this is, I don't know, we as humans, we'd love to be special.
That's just like the idea that we know that this other group. Yeah, it's like we still like we got slight. Hey, we're here, right. We're showing out for this one thing that we both love. And there's an event about this thing we both love. Obviously, we're going. I don't know you, but like, let's go and we can even integrate events into that. So let's just say it's like it's a band. You know, we can integrate them as an admin, take discounted tickets, et cetera. You can kind
of see the potential of all this can go. But the fact of the matter is. We're just trying to connect people based on who they are when they're sitting in the jammies on a Sunday watching Netflix. That's kind of the whole idea. The core. Everyone's core. Everyone has that. Yeah. No makeup. No, like, my hair's a mess, right? The real us that our partner's gonna know, uh, better or worse. Yeah. So for you all, is the goal a long -term relationship, a general relationship?
Like, what is the overarching goal, just that? Is it marriage? How are we defining all this? I would love to hear Christina's take on this. For us personally or for our users in the app? Oh, you're for our users. I mean, either way, but for your users in your app. I think the goal for our users is really just for them to have fun and like build connection, whatever that means, whether that's like short term or long term. And hopefully, ideally, whatever success
in dating means to them. And also with friendship, like we want them to build solid, strong foundations with friends in their area. And yeah, you know, it's whatever they prefer. Make them happy. Yeah, it's kind of like, how do I say this? It's been so strictly defined before. And in fact, we sometimes see that with investment, like, oh, it's a dating app. Well, it's not, I mean, it has dating aspects to it, but we actually present ourselves as compatibility
as a service. That's like what we call this new category because it's a little bit, we have like a free wave on our deck. It's like a little bit of dating app, a little bit of social network and a little bit of news aggregator, but it's not exclusively any of them. It's a weird new thing. And so I think the reason I bring that up is because what we're really getting to is what would you do if you knew specifically how compatible you are with everyone around you in
real time as a service. What would you do with that information? If it's specifically for connecting, do you want to find, I mean, that's inherently good for deeper connecting, but it's also just good for having interesting conversations. And we're just trying to basically create fascinating, but also like vulnerable dialogue. You know, I think, I think vulnerability is a big part of it. You don't have to put on a front as much just, or can be yourself and be rewarded for
it, which is. Unfortunately, I have novel concept in today's internet. So what about for you all, like, when I was on the apps, right, I was like, okay, I need to find someone to marry. This is doing my person for ever. Wow. Are you a hopeless romantic? Like, I was. Are you saying just because I'm a Gemini, I'm a hopeless romantic, too? Yeah, I want to know, because I was just like, yeah. Purpose that I am. Yes, that's true. Oh, that's okay. I know Raffy is. I am definitely a hopeless
romantic. Well, yeah, for sure. I'm like a stubborn hopeless romantic, though. But I will cry in any kind of romantic comedy kind of thing. I'm a crier, for sure. I want to touch on that stubborn part, because I think that's part of, like, the DC culture of it all, right? Like, too cool. Yeah, I feel like that's, like, I hate that.
And I think that's something that I've kind of talked with friends, obviously, but, like, I've been, like, going through, like, dating as, like, actually, like, letting the guard down in, like, a way that's productive and not just, like, after.
Like it starts going like rocky you start to feel that distance because also like you know I'm saying like I feel like it always takes two But I feel like when you have that vulnerability you save so much time and energy to realize it wasn't a match or wasn't supposed to be what it was. But I think that's something I definitely have lacked. Like when I've shown vulnerability in situations, other people haven't matched that vulnerability. So I think that's a constant thing
that I definitely see in a DC. I don't know if it's just a DC scene, but obviously in dating in general, for sure. Does anyone else kind of
get a little, I don't know. I get a little touchy like and like not sorry not like that I mean I almost like nervous in a way like kind of like I like I do a lot of romantic to be honest with you but it's kind of like I don't want to move into things too like not how do I say this there there are different levels to this like some people are like they're going one day and they're like what are we yeah it's other people who are like three months later I mean I'm neither one
of those but at the same time I feel like I might consider myself a hopeless romantic but I look at it through very So like a logical lens like pragmatic pragmatic lens, I guess yeah, like don't let your emotions run everything Yeah in scientific terms are real hopeless romantics like anxious attachment style people. Oh my gosh, you know probably yeah For real? Like, put that article in. Yeah, what's the other one, too? Like, disorganized? They're stable, which is
what I guess everyone... It's avoided, anxious, and then the stable connection, which is, like, I guess the goal for everyone. Yeah, or, oh, secure. Secure, secure, yeah. My background is in counseling. I'm a master's in counseling. So what I really enjoyed about this part is the psychology that goes into it. what I do as a counselor is talk about like questions or really thinking of questions that are going to connect to that person and be able to bring about a response.
And that's kind of what you're doing here in this app. Like, how do you get them to ask a question, be able to feel comfortable to ask something in their sphere that allows them to connect more based on outside from like, what do you like to do? How long have you been in DC? Where are you from? What do you do? Yeah, we're only letting the extroverts take the whole thing, you know? Yeah, like, this sounds amazing. So, we wanna play a little game with you all.
Okay, let's do it. So, this game is called Red Flag, Green Flag, Beige Flag. And we're just gonna put up a couple of different scenarios. What's Beige Flag, actually? You guys can ask that. Oh, yeah, so a red flag is like hard, no. Like, God, this is the worst thing ever. And green flag, of course, is your positive sign. But beige is like, meh, it's not like a deal breaker, but it's like, eh, like, I don't know. That's for me. OK, OK. I'm so excited. I've never
heard of this. Why am I nervous? Like my faults are sweaty all of a sudden. OK, so perfect. So we're going to play red flag, green flag, beige flag, where we give a couple of scenarios. And all three of our participants, because Rafi is participating too, are going to choose if this is a red, green, or beige flag. So the first scenario is ask your Spotify playlist before your phone number. Is that a red flag, or green flag, or beige flag, y 'all? OK. Hold on. Let
me think it through. That's an easy answer. I'm not going to say it. That's an easy one. Oh, I have two answers so far. I don't know the context, but I'm going to put beige flag. Oh my god, we have two. Two beige flag, one green flag. Why'd y 'all say beige? Who said beige? I said beige. Yeah. Okay, yeah, I said beige too, girl. No, I said beige because, okay, if I'm talking to you and I'm clearly interested in you and you're asking for my Spotify playlist but not my number,
I'm like, girl... Are you like into it or not? But then if I'm already into like, or if we've been hanging out and I'm mostly on Instagram with you, like we talk on Instagram and you ask me for a Spotify place, that's cool. Like, you know what I'm saying? It's just depending on the context for moi. I agree. I think for me specifically also like music is one of my love languages. So let's just figure that out before
you even trade like personal information. You know, like if we're not into music, like we're not going to vibe. It's just unfortunate. But yeah, that's what I think. Wait, that sounds like a green flag, the way you framed it, Christina. OK, I guess you're right. You should be like, what's your Spotify playlist? And let's go to like a vinyl record bar. You know, like maybe see something with the playlist ass. Like, don't just look at my playlist and walk away. Right.
Are you trying to do something or not? Yeah, be so savage. Like Adam, I would have chose green flag. I'd be like, oh, you like music choice. You want to see what I'm into, right? I think it's the gesture. Oh, go ahead, go ahead. Oh, no, I was just going to say, yeah. I was just gonna say, like, if what you said, music, if you don't like your music, how are we gonna match? I had someone tell me one time, I don't like
music. Literally. And then I realized, oh my God, we have nothing in common as we kept talking. So I was like, yeah, that's completely true, what you said. Wait, what do you mean dress sure though, Adam? Well, I mean, like, so if somebody, if I'm vibing with somebody, right, we're talking and she was like, let me see your Spotify playlist. That to me, of course, that signals a couple of things, right? First off, they love music,
which I love that they love music. And second, that music means a lot to them in context of compatibility. And I think, like, in a lot of ways, you're kind of and it keeps me on edge. Right. I'm all about the anticipation. So if there's a good music, I feel like seeing my playlist, they're like, oh, I love this place. Like, that's it. Like, you're so in play. That's like I'm swooned in that moment. You know? Yeah. I also think it kind of takes a certain level of confidence
that it's like nice. I just think it might be different for girls and guys. That's another thing. Like, I feel like a guy would be like, oh, that's green flag. A girl would be like, oh, he didn't ask for my number. Like, get over it. Yeah. I love that. So the next scenario we have is never makes plans, but just says, we'll see. Easy, unanimous. Who's green flagging that? Right. It's a red flag. You got to make plans. We'll see. I only like people who are wishy -washy
and I don't want to commit to anything. That's like just re -flagging that. Yeah, it's wishy -washy, but also some people love to beg, like they want you to beg to see and I'm like, girl, bye. No, no, no, no, no. So, yeah. If they wanted to, they would. That's what I learned. I feel like as an adult or just in life in general, you're just like, if they want you, they'll... DC's too busy. We don't have time for that. Right, right. Okay, so next one, easy. Follows all your
friends, but hasn't followed you yet. Girl. See, I see it different ways, because there's some people who, like, who will wait and, like, not follow you until, like, you know, everything is really secure and you're, like, really into each other, because they don't want to go through the whole unfollowed, you know, weird dating thing. Because it's weird, right? If you're dating, are you going to follow them, like, immediately? Or are you just talking to them, like, after
one day or two days? I don't know. That's just me. True. I think Instagram is a very sticky, like... There's so much... Unspoken rules about Instagram these days. I mean, I feel like I can't even keep up but yeah, that's a good point Well, I would say it's a red flag if you are actively following other people I know and not following me But if we don't are not talking about social media If you like that and like, if we haven't
even touched on it, I'm okay with that. Cause obviously working in social media, I'm like, we don't have to like talk about it. So I like that aspect of it. But if you're already following Nunu and not me, girl, bye. No. Cause you know, it's just funnier than you're ruffy. Which could be true, but Nunu is going to be messy and throw it into my face every time. If you want both of us, just ask. I agree with you. I'm just saying
devil's advocate. Just because I kind of like what you said, Rafi is like, also, unfortunately, I can't really do that now being, you know, leading essentially a social media company. But I like when people aren't plugged into social media that much. That seems healthy to me. Right. And unfortunately, it's not. We get an ambience of those who are. So it's like, I don't care. Like, I don't know. I followed you or I did like, I
don't know about probably will someday. I'm like, honestly, I like that better than if you did like you're welcome to. But the fact you like, I don't care. I'm like, I like that. It's sort of like, social media ain't that important to me. That was my favorite thing about my partner that he does not use social media. It like, helps so much. I'm like, great. He hates this. You can see it in his eyes. Next one, uses your Netflix
account without asking. Which means, you know, they have something there and they just say, I'm gonna use your Netflix because, you know, but you're not official yet. What if they create their own profile though? Is that cool? So, these are her red flags. These are Nunu's red flags, and we're just telling her we approve of everything. I need another red flag. Well, I don't think it's a good... I don't know, because you see, it's definitely moochy behavior. Okay, Nunu's
got thoughts on this. Did this happen to you? Is that why? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Clearly, honey. Don't tell them you have a Netflix. I've had to like, you know, remove the devices and stuff, so I've definitely gotten that. I have done that. My next question is, can I get on your Netflix, but I guess never mind. No, especially now. Netflix won't let me share. They gotta pay
$100 per person. True. That is a fun one. Oh, constantly refers to you as their friend around others, which is very DC, like you're just a friend. Wait, can I ask a question? Am I allowed to ask all of that? Yeah, let's clarify. What is the like, I think you got to paint like, what's the scenario here? Have you been on like one date? Have you been on like several dates? Like, OK, all right. I'm like, I'm just going to follow one date and I call it over my girlfriend like
right away. That's a pretty consequential thing to do with all of my friends. Like I better be sure because again, it's circumstantial. It's if we've been doing this for six months and people, your friends think we're dating and you still call me your friend. That's wild. But yeah, if we're starting out, but there's always a, every time someone's done that and in a friendship, there's always kind of like an acknowledgement or like a laugh or like kind of a thing that
signals that this is like more than just. At least in my experience, so I'm like, but if they're like, oh, no, this is this is my dude friend I'd be like go by so there's a I think there's a difference in communication or like body language when you say that for me for more I hope that if the friends are close enough to they would they would have some context leading into this and that's gonna bring some random sure you've never talked about and they're like, yeah But
new new clearly has with these questions It's actually in a hot seat Ooh, I want to talk about this, because DC restaurants, which have a whole other tirade on this, right? I'm from the South, from North Carolina, and Raffi is from, you know, somewhere between New York and North Carolina, all over the place. I don't think the food in DC is that great, especially with all these expensive restaurants, all these places that make you wait. I mean, I still don't think Nobu is that great,
but whatever. Anyway, make you split the bill every time. but insist on those expensive date spots, those exclusive DC restaurants. This is such a new question. Such a new question. Hold on. I mean, as someone who dates other men, I'm just going to go to the beige slash green flag. And I think that's also important because, right, in our different experiences, we have different expectations, like as queer people. I, you know, going Dutch is pretty much the standard until
you become - Is that the term? I didn't even know that. I wouldn't know that because I've never grown up - Dutch oven? I grew up always, you know, chivalry ain't dead, pay for the - pay for the girl on the date, and I always have, and I - You always pay? Always do, yeah. Oh!
Y 'all didn't think at all. I mean, every - I mean, in fact, every time, unless there's like - unless, God forbid, I don't know, the person who wants to go to frickin' let in Madison, and they're like, I insist on it on my group to split my bill. But I mean that, yeah. I mean, I think I always have, yeah. In gay world, I feel like if I've paid for some dates only because it gave that energy, like they were more of like, you know, like they were dolled up. How did you distinguish
that though? I'm curious. Um, I don't want to say gender norm is it but like I was definitely the more male presenting they were the more Fine it was new new No, it was definitely because they were clearly like like a femme and they they kind of gave them that gender euphoria So I kind of like fed into that kind of thing So yeah, I think those are the things for me that i'm willing to do but if it's another man that you know We're both identified as men and you
can pay for this spot and i'll pay for the next spot That's also what I would prefer not like splitting it halfway. That's too much Yeah, I just do the dinner drinks thing. I'll get dinner you get drinks. Yeah Yeah, like if we're splitting it, it means I didn't like you. Oh Because you don't want to owe them nothing. Yeah, I don't want to owe you anything I'm like, thank you so much for this past two hours. Let's not do this again I feel like it relieves the pressure
off of you. Like if I I can go to a nice restaurant Let me just do my thing. I'll see you later. And if I feel like talking to you, I will again. Wait messy question Adam someone who dates women, has anyone wanted to put the bill with you? I didn't have a good date. I'm just gonna say no. I mean, it's just like, I mean, not because of me. I'm almost because I feel like, like you said, it's kind of like different cultural experiences where to be totally honest, like it's expected
that the guy in straight dates will pay. And because I'm doing it anyways, most of the time without questions, putting my card down being like, thank you. I guess it is a gesture. Right. It's one of those. It's one of those funny things. I remember like I remember being taught by like my girlfriends in my mid 20s of like, you know, I don't like think that men should have to hold open the door for what we do stuff, but I love it when they do. I love it when someone goes
back a mile. Exactly. Yeah, there it is. And so I'm like, OK, that's what I'll do. I rely on Shilvery personally, so I love it. Yes, she definitely does. Oh my gosh, we're almost done. Takes 24 hours to respond, but still watches all your stories. Now, see, this could go either way, because they're still responding to you, but they're watching your stories before they do. That's such a red flag. I think it was a quick, quickest red flag for me. Yeah, I saw
a red flag. I thought you read it as a red for me. Like, of all the questions, I'm like, this is... I hate it. Why'd you dive into that? There's so many, like, there's a word for it. I don't remember what it's called. Breadcrumbing? Yes, yes, breadcrumbing. Where they're just like lurking. Oh, and there's another one called submarine. But anyway, they're just like lurking on you, but then take a while to respond. I guess it depends on what was the last text. Was it like
an ending conversation text? Or was it like a less planned something text and you just didn't answer me? Because I'm not a good texter. But if you're watching my stories are clearly on your phone and you can respond to something about like planning the next day or something Yeah, same. I'm a terrible texture. But when I Someone texts me and I haven't texted them and it comes to watching their story. I feel such guilt exactly And you guys have good just accountability in
your minds. Most people are just flowing through their stories. The fact that you have this trigger in your mind to be like, I have all these open. I definitely do that too, but there's a core group of people that you want to keep up with, and I just keep up with for sure. But yeah, no, I definitely say that that's something that's definitely, I feel like a trend in DC dating, if not gay dating here. I feel like that's definitely
something that happens a lot. But another thing is, again, to bring back the previous conversation, is social media also isn't that serious. So it's like, I don't know, I constantly have this debate that's like, oh, they probably just left their phone on and the stories just kept going. Oh, no, I never feel that way. Never feel that way?
It was intentional. My phone is always on and I sometimes see my Instagram stories going and I'm like, oh shit, I just watched like 20 people's stories and they probably thought I actually watched it. But I would never give anyone else
that grace or accountability. Yeah, I do it like I'll press Instagram I forget and I'll look down like wow with you like 20 stories for sure But and then you weren't at those people saw you so you see I'm not worried But I also don't believe someone would just watch my story and not but you know actually be there to see me That was our last question of a red flag green flag beige flags And I don't know what color the flies were after all that There wasn't a lot of green flags
in there. Not a lot of green flags, but one green flag for sure is downloading the Impress app, especially if you're in DC. So I want to know one last final thought you all. Like why, why Impress? Especially for hustling and bustling DC listeners. You know what? I probably got the long winded like backstories. I would love to hear Christina's answer first and then I'll just take it on with the actual reason I started this whole thing. Because you know, I want to know
this too, Alex, why did you join Ambrose? Yeah, I mean, why not get media literate while also finding the love of your life or your best friend? I think it's a two in one stone and we're going to be building more and, you know, really building connections and making the world a smaller place and a more, you know, fun place instead of what's currently going on the news. And it's kind of impressed like a happy escape from current news while still being educated on the news. And so
I think that's why it's really great. to just download it and play around and check out some stuff. Yeah, this is great. Love to hear that. It's great to hear some people working on a team, like, say better things than you could say about your own product. So thank you, Christina. No, I mean, yeah, I mean, the whole reason that this whole started was, yeah, but back when I was doing grad school, I wanted to, I was a former
journalist, right? And I wanted to try to find a way to make media -literate consumption of news more appealing. I mean, we all know those juicy algorithms that always agree with us, oversimplify everything, blame everyone for every problem in the world. are very addictive and very fun to use, but they're not reality. And nuance takes time. These quick TikTok scrolls, they ain't got no time for nuance and understanding of the world. So how can we beat them at their own game?
Like we're not going to beat them on the stickiness and addictedness factor, but maybe we could beat them in a different universal need, which is love and connection. And so if you basically make that important factual news that means to that end, people will play ball. and they'll end up falling in love about it while they're at it. And so it's kind of a win -win for everybody.
We all believe, we all come back to a place where water is wet, that being so siloed, and figure out juicy insights about each other in the process.
Yeah, when you explained and impressed like a newspaper that you could wake up every morning and do that that really resonated with me because that's to go with what Christina said it is a very more like like relaxed sense of the news positive sense of the news and I don't feel like I have to like flinch at what the story is gonna be so that I definitely think is like my favorite feature of just that news like it you can treat it like a newspaper I don't feel like I have
to be looking at like the New York Times, the Washington Post, and all these things. Because sometimes, like I said, you, especially with recent news, you kind of see how they kind of, this one thing happened with planes, and there's just a lot of news that is funneling through the planes. And you know what I'm saying? Like, it's just like very much algorithmic like that. And I just, yeah. And then that just turns us all into, in our own echo chambers, right? So
that's kind of how we feel about it. It's funny, you might get a kick out of this, but we had 11 Georgetown interns last semester. We talked about it and asked them, explained to them that it's like a newspaper. And they're like, well, how did that work? They're like, well, a newspaper works like that. It's just everyone sees the same articles at a local area on a given day. And they're like, that's... really good, like that sounds nice, like it's kind of more consumable.
We're like, yes, it's been around for a hundred years. This is the idea. A concept. Another thing is like we filter out the news outlets. So like no one's leaning a certain way. Everything's factual. Everything's reliable. So you don't have to do a constant guessing game as like a consumer. Like you just want to read the effing news, you know? I don't want to do the mind hops and the mental hops. And I also think it's great to have a diversity of outlets. Like you're not
just reading one. whole thing like New York Times or like one WSJ. Like you're getting a diversity of outlets that, you know, can just educate you in different ways. Yeah. Yeah. She's right. All the outlets are vetted. We use a third party fact checker for that. And so you can basically ensure it won't be a sensationalist. It won't tell you the world's burning because that satisfies the person, but it will tell you what is happening
in a world where water is wet. And you can do with that what you will get what you need and move on to the mass ranking side. I love it, love it. Well, you heard it here first. It is 2025, and it's time to try something new. So try something new within press. Not only does it offer a different way to meet people and date people, it's something that connects us in DC. And I think slowing down and really defining that connection is something we all need, especially
in this crazy, crazy time. Media literacy is sexy, that's what we said. Well, we want to thank Adam and Christina from Impress for being a part of our episode today. This is really fun, you all. Yeah. You're great. This is our first interview back and we like always are nervous about interviews because you know sometimes I feel like it's controlling the person and kind of like feeding off but this was such a fun interview. I feel like we were just like chit chatting on a phone call. We go
way back. All your rest free interviews are all downhill from here. Yeah dating is such a fun thing to talk about you know. Everyone has dating stories. So thank you all so much. Make sure you all at home download Impress on your app store so you can be in -game connecting again. Thank you, Adam. Thank you, Christina. And we'll see y 'all next time. What an episode. Do you feel enlightened? Do you want to get back in the dating scene? No, I'm so happy where I am.
But if I was, I would definitely use Impress because I like the mental stimulation, but there's an option for friends. So you never know. You might see me out there and you're grused. And if you want to speed up the process and be our friend, just follow us on Instagram, follow us on TikTok. You can follow me at weightrafi on both Instagram and TikTok. Also on YouTube, why not? You never know, we might start more work on there too. Make sure you follow your girl
at New New Paris with two S's. And you can always see me once a month at Reggaeton Brunch, follow at Reggaeton Brunch DC, where we get a pop -it every month. And you can see me throughout the DMV, because y 'all know I'll pop up at random shows everywhere, OK? I want to thank Adam and Christina, our favorite Gemini and Leo duo, from one Gemini Leo duo to another. We had so much fun. Wait, also, real quick, what was the lesson here? What should our audience member not do?
I don't think you should do the talking stage, and I think it's important to remember that if they wanted to, they would, okay? Wait, don't settle for less. Wait, don't be afraid to upgrade your dating game, okay? Because it's 2025. Things are changing, and so do you. That's the only way you're gonna find love. Do not do a man any favors, okay? They will think, they will try to make you think that they are the prize. Do
not forget that you are the prize. You are the absolute prize, unless they're also great too, you know? Let's not villainize people out there. I think everyone's trying to survive in this dating world. Exactly, we're all just trying to survive. So I think with Impress, the world will be a little bit more better, because you've already impressed me, Raffy. Oh, I'm so glad, Nunu. I love you. She won't say it back. I know I love you all for listening. Thanks for listening
to the episode. make sure to follow at weight rafi and at new new paris for all updates especially about reggaeton brunch and when you're gonna party with us we'll see you there