Deep under the Pentagon, there is a door. An armed guard stands at this door, ever watchful. Should you present the proper credentials, you will be allowed beyond. Inside is a brightly lit and sterile elevator. Should you take that elevator down as far as it goes you may find yourself in a large, open… Read more S3:E34 – Hank Williams Jr. “Are You Ready for Some Football” Music Video...
Listen kids don’t put that salad in your mouth. It’s…not healthy OK. Nothing here is healthy. You can’t eat anything at this restaurant, or at least you shouldn’t. We watched this weird Canadian PSA about not putting things in your mouth. You should watch it too and learn its secrets. John Hurst hosts and becomes… Read more S3:E33 – Don’t Put It In Your Mouth
There are some search terms that you just know will form a powerful intersection of energies; a load-bearing support of the deep human psyche. Before you even finish typing the phrase, you can begin to feel the weight of the results. Past that electronic Rubicon, you know there is an inescapable puissance of madness. Perhaps… Read more S3:E32 – Evanescence “Bring Me to Life” Music Video
Hey, d’ya ever wonder what the future is gonna be like? Do you think there’s gonna be like…robots? What about swimming pools? Will the robots swim in the swimming pools? What about sandwiches? Will the pools eat the sandwiches? Do sandwiches ride horses and what happens to horse bones after the pools eat the sandwiches?… Read more S3:E31 – Lil Nas X “Panini” Music Video
Listen, Harvard’s easy to get into OK? You just…throw on your smoking jacket, barge down a brandy and take a big rip of your CBD vape while submitting your taped application. It works more often than you think, especially if you live in the increasingly unlikely Legally Blonde universe. Give it a shot! (Also it… Read more S3:E30 – Legally Blonde Movie Trailer
In the beginning Ronald set “Let there be fries” and there were fries and Ronald saw they were good. Then came the dark days and there was much chaos. Ronald looked down and said “I shall punish them with a great Shamrock Shake” and they sat in their cars, listened to their podcasts and gnashed… Read more S3:E29 – Ronald McDonald Make it Click PSA
The seat feels worn. You’re sitting in a seat? You’re sitting in a seat. A movie theater seat. When did you go to the movies? There’s a cup in the armrest, it’s lukewarm soda and ice melt. You take a sip anyway. Did you fall asleep? Muscles ache to move and you long to stretch,… Read more S3:E28 – Mission Impossible 2 Movie Trailer
In some far distant era, when the year 2019 sounds like the year 219 to our modern ears, little of what made us will remain. Our physical bodies will have dissolved away, very little will prove that we ever existed at all. Some art though, will live on. Some of it will be great, while… Read more S3:E27 – HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA
To Steven, the person whom I lent Final Fantasy VII to in middle school and never returned it: No, seriously, what happened to that copy of Final Fantasy VII, Steven? I’m not even mad anymore about it! You said you broke Disc 1 and threw away the entire game. We all know that’s a lie!… Read more S3:E26 – Konami PSX Era Logo
Man, I have no idea what’s happening here. I watched this a bunch and I just…don’t get it. Is that rice? Coconuts? Why is it hairy? What. Is. This. John. Seriously. We watched something or another this week. Get in on it. John Hurst hosts this week and lives in the goof. Aaron Littleton co-hosts… Read more S3:E25 – 沖縄食糧の天気予報
We’re back to the well with more local Ric Flair commercials! This week, we watched something out of Kansas where Ric hocks some fireworks and seems supremely disinterested. Like, REALLY disinterested. Like, mostly he’s thinking about eating ham sandwiches kind of disinterested. Here’s the commercial. It’s…not worth watching. Aaron Littleton hosts and wins another award.… Read more S3:E24 – Ric Flair Fireworks Commercial...
The year was 1990 and the decade had just rolled over, kayfabe was still alive and somehow, SOMEHOW people bought the idea of Sting teaming up with Sting in a tag team wrestling match against Ric Flair. Even without endless fog machines and sweet pink stage lighting, life was good. This week we watched a… Read more S3:E23 – Sting and RoboCop Wrestling Promo
What can make you smile? A million dollars? A kitten? Perhaps even…gold? Well, for one man in 1980s Europe (and let’s not get too more specific on just exactly where in Europe) there was one and only one answer for that: a Volkswagen hatchback. Some people, huh? This week, we watched a classic Volkswagen Golf… Read more S3:E22 – Volkswagen Golf GTi Casino Commercial
If your house bugs and a spare room, it may be time to call Orkin. Yes, for just the price of room and board for a stranger for the rest of their (or your) life you too can maybe be free of insects for a little while. It’s…great? Anyway, we watched this entirely forgettable Orkin… Read more S3:E21 – Orkin “Always Workin'” Commercial
Are regular theme parks not enough any more? Not getting the same thrills from being strapped into a roller coaster called the Exploding Eagle and zooming upside down over a parking lot that could easily become your grave if the 21 year old stoner “safety inspector” called Cory failed to do his job properly that… Read more S3:E20 – Action Park Commercial
Don’t feel down, little green man! You can do this! Yes you can! You’re my strong little green man with a purple hat and a towel around your neck! Chin up little guy! Yes, chin up! A boost for everyone’s psyche, this week, we watched a clip from Dragon Ball Z where Piccolo feels pretty… Read more S3:E19 – THIS IS AMAZING! I FEEL INCREDIBLE!
The Sonic wars almost escalated into a third week. Thankfully, a deal was reached and the armistice was signed between the two hosts. The mutual ground to sign such a treaty? A minor Sci-Fi TV series that noone can actually remember what it was about. Only that they quested in the sea a lot and… Read more S3:E18 – SeaQuest DSV TV Opening
TEETH TEETH TEETH TEETH TEETH TEETH BACKWARDS TEETH (HTEET) Revenge is a messy business, particularly when your plan of revenge is to just play the trailer we watched last week in reverse so we can talk about TEETH some more. Why can’t we just have more TEETH? Don’t you enjoy TEETH? Try some today! John… Read more S3:E17 – Sonic the Hedgehog Movie Trailer in Reverse
Sure, you’ve watched the trailer yourself. Sure, you’ve watched about a dozen YouTube reactions to the trailer. Sure, you’ve read about a hundred mid-brow thinkpieces about how the YouTube reaction videos to the trailer are contributing to a culture of hedgehog fastness disparity, or like, something. Well now you’re going to listen to US watch… Read more S3:E16 – Sonic the Hedgehog Movie Trailer
You’re about to buy an energy drink and suddenly, woo! A flash of light, the smell of vitamins and there he is: Ric Flair. He’s got a possibly-opened bottle of Fuel In A Bottle energy drink and he’s forcing it into your hand. Now he’s taking your wallet and teleporting away, leaving a puff of… Read more S3:E15 – Ric Flair Fuel In A Bottle Energy Commercial
Somewhere deep in what looks like a strip mall in Orlando, there is a hallway. It is primarily beige, an unremarkable place with flecked vinyl tiles on the floor. In the hall there is a doorway, also beige, also unremarkable. There is no sign on the door, no number. If you ask one of the… Read more S3:E14 – Legends of the Hidden Temple: Mask of Shaka Zulu Temple Run
The Double Cheeseburger! It’s back! It’s back! Tell the world! Ninety-nine cents only! Your joy is now complete! For one penny less than a dollar you can get two patties with cheese! Commodity prices are low! So is the price on your life! This week, we watched a McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger commercial on loop. It’s… Read more S3:E13 – McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger Commercial
Who is the Boss? Is it Angela (Judith Light), who works as an advertising executive and exhibiting the sheer raw power of 80s Shoulder Pads to a devastating level? Is it Tony Danza, who is just playing a character named Tony in the show and didn’t have the time in his stardom to learn a second… Read more S3:E12 – Who’s the Boss TV Opening
In the early days of the web, well, the mid-early days, er, maybe the silver age? Screw it, let’s call it the proto-Attitude era of the web, this was a cartoon that was on it. It looped when you watched it. We liked it. We may have even recorded it on VHS. This week we… Read more S3:E11 – Badgers Flash Cartoon
What do you do after you save the world? Do you fade to the background and let people live their lives? Retreat to the woods and become a wise hermit? What about relishing the money and power you’re surely due? What if the answer was none of those things – what if the answer was… Read more S3:E10 – Final Fantasy X-2 Opening
In the hierarchy of chain doughnut places, Krispy Kreme has settled to the bottom, if not in quality, then at least the bottom of the country. Krispy Kreme’s fried treats have their strong points, especially their frosting waterfall. Sure, from time to time, it may get used for nefarious purposes, but the very concept of… Read more S3:E9 – Krispy Kreme Donut Conveyor Belt
Listen, when you’re Wendy’s, sometimes you gotta teach people how to make coffee. That’s just how it is. These are the kinds of people this video is for. You gotta entertain them with some music, a little bit of dancing, a little bit of sexual innuendo. Maybe a LOT of sexual innuendo. Or maybe that’s… Read more S3:E8 – Wendy’s Training Video for Hot Drinks
The Casio Loopy will make you forget about your friends, as its commercial clearly shows. First, you’ll be making a visual novel on your television, then you’ll print stickers of your visual novel, then you’ll use the stickers to stick your friends to the walls of your bedroom, slowly covering them day by day in… Read more S3:E7 – Casio Loopy Commercial
The Pontiac Aztek has a reputation for being a bad and ugly car, even if in recent years internet car journalists have started to rethink that. Maybe, they argue it was just an ugly car. Or maybe it was a bad car. Or, I dunno, maybe it was an ugly and bad car. Unwarranted takes… Read more S3:E6 – Pontiac Aztek Commercial
The archangel Peter Gabriel may have left with his Sledgehammer, but Phil Collins still watches over us all. He helps those who cannot dance and those who cannot walk. He helps an Iguana get a lift to a much needed hot rock destination. He gives up his constantly focused on blue jeans to a pool… Read more S3:E5 – Genesis “I Can’t Dance” Music Video
