Hey, everyone. Its Vanessa, thank you so much for joining us on episode 13 of transcending humanity. I wanted to ask you all to please like, comment, subscribe, if you're on our YouTube channel, follow us on our podcast platforms, and tell your friends, tell your co workers, we really want to get our voices out there and heard. We're growing. I would love for us to grow quicker. And we need your help to do that. Thank you so much. And enjoy this episode. I think you'll like it quite a
bit. We'll start, we'll set well hello, everybody. Welcome to Episode 13 of transcending humanity. We had a guest lined up. But that guest was I had an unfortunate circumstance tonight. So they're not available to be here. But we hope to have them on here again soon. So Lisa and I were set to be co hosts with that guest episode. So here we are right now. And we're like, okay, but
what do we do? So, we are going to talk about pronouns, because it's something that many of us struggle with, including a lot of us in the trans community. My, my last boss used to say that, it feels like anyone over 30 struggles with them. So Gen Z, Gen Z is just awesome. They know how to do everything. So but as, as aged people, you know, long in the tooth as spinsters. We struggle with it. So Lisa, is, is? Do you still consider yourself a teacher, a former teacher?
I consider myself a former teacher, I write curriculum now. Okay. So I mean, that's something that I have to do within my curriculum, I have to be very aware of pronouns. Okay, so working, I work for a company who writes curriculum for online for an online charter school. And before that, I was a corporate trainer. And right now, I'm currently in New York. And so this is not something that's brand new to me by any means, as in terms of, we need to be aware of people's
pronouns. And this was really taking shape when I moved up here three years ago. And coming from Texas, had I ever really thought about it? No. However, if I had a student who said, Can you call me this instead? I always honored it. I mean, I taught high schoolers. They're not like, they're pretty short kids. A lot of people don't give them credit. I always did.
It's, it's smart to give them credit. Because it's, I mean, a lot of times I'm sure they go home, I used a case. And I was just called an idiot all the times all the time. Turns out, I'm autistic. So there's a reason I struggled throughout school. But yeah, so high schoolers definitely need to be listened to all students do by high schoolers, especially because that's like, when so
much is changing. And they're about to become adults and be thrown out into the world to the wolves, and be accosted by boomers. And
yes, and not all boomers are open to change. No. Not at all. I mean, a large percent of Gen X. So yeah,
we can make fun of boomers because boomers ruin this country. I'm a trans girl, I'm allowed to hit boomers because, yeah. Look at all the people who are writing all the laws to erase my existence.
Exactly. So and that's, you know, that's something that I will never understand. But that is something the pronouns are coming up in these laws. And they're all there. It's not only the pronoun issue, it's if teachers don't turn students in, their jobs are on the line. And I'm like, tell me how this is all working.
Yeah, it's these teachers have to I saw a post from a teacher like that she's like in 2019. We were allotted as heroes and then it's just all sudden from there and now with the villains and teachers, I mean, the pay does not anywhere close come to true compensation for what they do. Teachers have to supply so much of their own stuff and Now they're expected to be essentially stopped, oh caseworkers, I mean, there are already a lot of people expecting them to carry guns. And like
I honestly will say, number one, it's a calling. And it was my calling for 14 years, and I loved it. I loved every single student I taught, I have students that still keep in touch with me, which is phenomenal, because I get to watch their kids grow up. Now. That's pretty cool. It's I mean, I get invited to weddings, I get invited to birthday parties, and, you know, stuff like that, or Hey, Miss mags, when are you coming home, you know, back to
Texas, and I am so. But it's just the relationships that I made with my students, who were my students on top of the relationships I made because I was a safe space that will forever stay in my heart. But I got out at the right time, which was the end of 2020 when the you know, the last quarter of the school year, we were homebound. And then I moved from Texas up here, and it was a total different mindset. But in a good
way. But, you know, changing things, the okay make sure you know, as the employee I was with the company I was with, which was under UAlbany. It was please make sure you have your pronouns, enter your name. And then we took it a further step, please make sure that when you sign your trainees up, you give us their preferred pronouns. And so it was so pronouns for me other than trying to remember who's, who goes with what
pronoun. And so jokingly, you know, if it's a group, I say, y'all, because hey, I'm from Texas, I'm from the south. But I appreciate on Zoom. Vanessa has her pronouns, even though I don't even know how long you and I have known each other, but we I would know to call you she or her
lease since the end of last year? I think so i
think yeah, it's, it's been just around a year or so. Yeah. But when people I don't know, don't have them on on either default today.
Yeah. That's, I think that's the best advice that we can give to anybody, if you don't know. And you're not able to ask for one reason or another. Like, if you're just referring to somebody in a third person. And you don't know just use there. It's really not that hard. And people, people will tell you, Oh, I can't use the that's too hard. But then they'll like say, they'll drop it in conversation just normally, because we use the them all the time when referring
to people. But society is so obsessed with the binary,
which makes no sense. I just saw something on LinkedIn that I thought was really cool. And I'm a huge Shakespeare fan. But in Hamlet, and I didn't really realize this and I think there's my William right there. It didn't dawn on me until they this person pointed it out. He uses he uses day and Hamlet all the time. Only Jane Austen another favorite of mine used they in Pride and Prejudice all the time. And so this fear of using they them stupid over
yourselves. It's been it's been throughout history. Totally! (Whispers) hey conservatives.... there's my ASMR for tonight. It's it's like you see these conservative nut jobs like going on about pronouns and calling us pronoun people. But if I am guarantee you that if you refer to one of these people, by their incorrect pronouns, they would get pissed off. So like, was it Ted Cruz who said I'm Ted Cruz and my pronouns are kiss my ass or something like that. I think
it's exactly what it was. But I'm like, oh, it's not that hard. It's really not that hard. It's just a respect thing. I think that's what it boils down to be. But, but the assumptions and we all know what assume is
it makes an ass out of you and me
and but the assumptions that are certain what I would call surface assumptions, you know, if I walked into a store not knowing who you were, but I see that you're dressed as a female. I would say, ma'am, this,
you know, because I sure don't get that much around here.
And then, you know, and I'm always the type two that when when I lived in New Braunfels we had we had one target, it could have it could have gotten to more now, but we had one target and we have this young worker. I don't know what their pronouns are, but they wore makeup looked masculine, but wore makeup. And I always complimented them. I was like, Oh my gosh, your makeup is phenomenal. So is your hair. And they would be very taken aback because number one, I'm a white
woman. But number two, it wasn't. Oh my gosh, I can't believe you're wearing makeup and your hair like a girl. You know, but actually complimenting.
I need to do another ASMR thing pretty conservatives wear makeup to get my hair makeup. Their men can wear makeup to anyone from wearing makeup everyone. Everyone should wear eyeliner. I mean, everybody looks good. And eyeliner. It's just
it pops their eyes. Yeah,
it's it's I there's I think there's that tick tock that I follow. Yeah, and he's a gay guy. And he's he's a makeup artist and he just does very basic, like makeup on himself, but just to just kind of accentuate some features here and there. And he looks fucking amazing. And I'm sure he gets laid constantly selling that's what we're all just trying to do in the end. Isn't it? Just fuck
for fun
for fun. Yeah. Yeah, the boomers want us to do it for procreation, but yeah, me too. I no longer have these. So
why this is all shut down? Yeah,
exactly.
Being a Gen X has its perks.
That in just being Gen X it's fucking badass generation really? So I mean, it's very underrated. But I think the last most resilient generally Yeah, I would agree. So latchkey kids. That's why I'm like right on the cusp. I am and consider an example because I tread both millennial and x. So I have a lot of income and with both and definitely still a latchkey kid. Unfortunately, your generation also has run fucking DeSantis but I won't hold that against you.
I mean, I know. I know many times it was makeup artists, but you look at the makeup art the makeup on men for me. 80s groups, especially the English groups, Culture Club, boy, George, I loved choice. Duran Duran was my all time all time favorite. And their makeup. Nick Rhodes was always point on. And again, it could have been makeup artists, but I bet he's been you know, taking pictures of outside. And he still had phenomenal makeup. Yeah. Because
why not? I mean, it's I don't know why people will me rephrase that. I know why people because that's what society is doing. They're they're combat it. You know, just let people be people. Don't worry about it. Mind your own. Take care. You
are so obsessed with what other people are doing. And why it is so much easier in life to just be a decent person and treat people nice. The amount of energy that so many people expend that just being fucking deuces. Oh, it is. It's exhausting just to think about. It wears you down to like, if you go out and you treat a server like shit. That server is going to have their day ruined.
They're probably going to be assholes to their co workers for the rest of the day and they'll probably go home, I just be in a funk. And do you actually feel better for chewing out someone making $2.13 an hour for something that they didn't even do? It's it's I used to wait tables. I think everybody should have to wait tables and or work retail for at least a year in their life and the world would be such a better place. What's
that and teach and teach? Yeah. Anything where you have to be assaulted by the public in many ways. I think there will be a better place or you can go out and get a target. Your person checking you out has amazing makeup on. You say your makeup looks absolutely fantastic. You just made their day. You uplifted yourself. You've transcended humanity.
And that's why we're here. We're trying to transcend
humanity. Exactly. I,
I totally agree with you it what? You know, every, we talked about being kind. And just this I ordered in because I was so swamped at work. So I said, Okay, I'm doing Uber Eats the my driver deliver. I had already tipped on the app. Early. Let me know they were on their way. Do you want me to ring your doorbell? Or do you want me to just leave it? And I was like, you can ring my doorbell? It's okay. I ran down a cage. And I ran down so fast and gave them another $5. Just
because I mean, it was. And I told them, I said, you don't know how much I appreciate that. Yeah. And they were like, well, I know that if I do set if I order, I want things to be done a certain way. And I said, that's what a lot of people don't remember.
Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I do have to say, as a former rideshare and food delivery, gig worker, person, thing. One, don't do it, it sucks to if you are ordering, keep in mind that these people are barely paid anything by the delivery platforms. Like if you order Taco Bell from someplace that's 10 miles away. That person is only going to make about $2.50.
If they accept the order, the food delivery platforms like to mask what money that people are actually going to earn, which I don't know how to get around that legal loophole because you're supposed to be independent contractors know exactly what you're going to earn up front. But that's not how it works. Even if someone gives a fat tip, they'll like, cap it out. So you don't know don't know how much it actually is. So But where was I on that? Oh, the people delivering your
food. One, they have zero control over the quality of the food that you have ordered. They're not in the kitchen. If the bags are almost always sealed by the kitchen. So if you open a sealed bag, and not everything's in there, most of the time, the people delivering food don't even know what's in your order. They just know that they that you have an order. Don't get milkshakes. Pain in the ass. Please don't wander milkshakes. And, yeah, I know typing ahead is a pain and not
all drivers are great. But it's it's a grueling fucking job. It's super competitive, because there's so many people out there doing it right now, just fighting over scraps. But if you're constantly getting called food, check how much you're tipping. And there's a reason that your food is called, what the apps do is for, because we generally know when people don't take because it'll come that it's like a two hour delivery or
something like that. But the food delivery platforms will start adding on more and more money in order to finally entice someone to pick it up. But like, I can't tell you how many times I would go pick up at Chipotle, which I fucking hate that Chipotle, they're always so slow. But I don't pick up there and there will be a shelf just full of bags of DoorDash orders and shit that weren't picked up.
Because the people that ordered it didn't tip it all in would you drive across a town, wait in line for 15 minutes and drive back across town paying for your own fucking gas and insurance and maintenance for $2.50 No matter what, no one would even have a gallon of gas. No, it doesn't. So just keep that in mind. You are paying for a service you're paying for the
convenience. And yeah, it's gonna be more expensive, the food's gonna be more expensive period because everything gets jacked up on there because everyone has to take their cut. But don't forget the driver. And yeah, I know a lot of people like to tip in cash, and which is nice to have some cash tips. But your order will be treated by drivers as someone who didn't tip because there's no way of letting the driver know that there's a tip on there. And so no one's gonna want to pick up
again a $2 order. So if you want to take cash, Sure, great, but put it in on top. The entire system is stupid and broken. and horrible, but there's my tips for people ordering. Just easier.
Talking about working at restaurants. My niece worked at a restaurant in San Antonio had a group of about 10 to 15. People, I can't remember exactly how many, it was over an $800 order because of all the drinks and everything. They tipped her 20 bucks. That's why not 25% 20
bucks. That's why I hate when restaurants don't have a policy of like a minimum tip over a certain amount of people. There's a reason they do that is for groups like that. I remember this never happened to me. This is a pronoun episode, isn't it? This never happens to me. But it happened to a co worker, and I've seen it happen to other people. But I waited tables in like, from like 2000 to 2001 2002 or something like that. And there would be people
that would leave fake money. It would be like a fake $20 bill. And when you turn it over, it had like, scripture on it. And like the truth, the truth tip is Jesus. Yeah. Okay, well, that's great. But Jesus isn't fucking paying my electric bill. Okay. I remember one girl got one of those and like a handful of pennies. And she just ran out of there crying. Why do that to people, if you're going out, you are being served. That is a service. Restaurants get around the labor laws get around it by
making service rely on tips. But that is how they make their money. If you really don't want restaurant, want to have to tip at restaurants, your food is going to get much more expensive not just include the price of tip, but then the company is going to have to pay all the employment taxes and all that stuff and just want to charge on extra anyways. So you can go get a $10 chicken sandwich right now. And leave you know, $5 Tip.
Or if you really wanted to do away with tipping that $10 Chicken Sandwich would be $25. Easy.
So luckily, it's one of our mascots is here.
Oh, hi, Luna. Mine is
passed out on the bid. Yeah.
So I guess we should get back to pronouns. Okay. Yeah, our listeners
kind of go on tangents. Wanting to. But again, how difficult is it? Just to say they, if you don't know, it's
not, it really isn't. It takes a little bit of reprogramming of your brain. And but I love I love when I see people trying. And, you know, like my my son's grandparents just now. Like a year and a half into my transition. They're finally calling me she. And it's not that they didn't want to it's just how they were programmed. And it's okay to struggle with it. We all struggle I miss gender myself, I miss gender other people. I'm a student or other trans people. And I've probably done it on the
show without knowing it. I know I have. Yeah, it's just apologize.
Yeah. And how, how, how simple is it? Just so I'm so sorry? What is it again? How do you go? You know, what are your pronouns? Again, I'm going to ingrain them in my brain.
And another thing with that, don't worry about apologizing too much. Like, if you know you slip, say that and then say thank you. Or if you don't know, you slipped, and they correct you just say thank you and keep going. If you start saying if they correct you say Oh, I'm sorry. The it makes it awkward. Just say oh shit, thanks. No, no. Thank you for calling me out on it. And then the conversation just keeps
going. Because in the pronouns, they're both a big deal and they're not a big deal at the same time. It's how we identify with ourselves. Like, if someone calls me he, I fucking cringe and just want to poke their eyeballs out and feed them to my dogs. But yeah, throat punch. Yes, thank you. This is gonna get demonetized Oh, we only have 41 subscribers. We're not monetized anyway. So subscribe, like, comment, share all that stuff. But yeah, it's it's just not the pronoun issue, it really
isn't an issue. I just did Trump mouth issue. It really isn't an issue but but the Conservatives are making issue just like they are with trans people, trans people with Around fucking forever. And like other languages have even more pronouns than we do. You know, and they, they have gendered fucking words that we don't have. And it's just accepted. It's not a big deal to just call someone by their correct pronouns. If someone has their pronouns listed somewhere, that
means that they care. And if you see someone with obey them, be sure to refer to them as they are then. If you see a he him to him, if you do see she hurt you see her? If you see our hopeful guest in the future River. Bay fair. I don't even know if I'm pronouncing those correctly. Because he is right.
I don't. There. I don't know. But I think you're either
Yeah. So it's just refer to them by that it's that simple. It's really not a big deal. And just, if you struggle with it, if it makes you mad, just spin it around. If you're an angry old white dude, and someone comes up to you and calls you or she, are you going to be okay with that? No, of course, there's nothing wrong with being a woman, there's nothing wrong with being a man. But if you don't identify as that gender, it's going to be jarring. And that's exactly how
it is for the rest of us. So I another thing when it comes to pronouns, or just that kind of thing, I really wish that as society we can do away with the gendered salutations like sir and ma'am, and stuff like that. And especially on the phone, like, customer service, jobs are hard, I get it. But a lot of us, like, especially like for trans women, but there's a lot of people with different issues
with their voices. Like, you can hear me right now I'm going in and out of a fan voice because it's very hard for me to keep it up, I have to constantly think about it. And sometimes when I talk on the phone, I can't do, I can't modify my voice at all. So I'm just gonna be like, Hey, hi, this is Vanessa. And I'm automatically going to be surd on that call. And that is it just makes us cringe when that happens and make anybody cringe. And there are sis women with
more masculine voices. There are six men with more feminine voices. It's just let's just do away with that. There's just use other language, just a friend, or how can I just How can I help you? Thank you, thank you for calling.
I worked for a major insurance company out of Texas when I first gotten out of college. And it was run by former military officers. And they were very, you know, strict on the protocol, because that's military protocol. Makes sense? Obviously, you know, but I had a, I had a member call. And he was the sweetest guy I ever spoke with. And he had a very effeminate voice. And I, and his name was like, a very common for, what do they call it? I guess we would call it gender fluid now
androgynous gender fluid? Yeah, my name is Pat. Exactly, yeah. Next to millennials.
So I made the mistake of saying, ma'am, and he goes, Oh, no, I'm male. And I went, Oh, I I am. I apologize. I'm so sorry. Because I hadn't. And when you got to their member screen that gave you all the demographics. And I and I asked, I said, Can I ask you a question? personal ID if you say no, I won't do it. But if you would like me to, I can add a note to your file that will pop up immediately. And he said, what I said, you know, it could be a note about the, you know, member has a very soft
voice. I didn't classify it in a gender ish, you know, in a gender way or anything like that. And he said, Oh, that would be lovely. You know, and but he, you know, the minute I said, Man, oh, no, I'm a sir. And I went, Oh, I apologize. Your voice threw me off. And he goes, Oh, that happens all the time when I call and that's why I said, Hey, can I do this for you? I got the nicest presidential compliment from him. And I was like, all I did was put a note on saying he has
a soft voice. You know, I was like, but it's amazing what it does. For people. It it does. It's like you said it doesn't matter. There's going to be sis women who have very voices, especially if they've been smokers. And then there's going to be this sis male who have very effeminate voices That's like just it, but I totally get doing away with the mamzer and
stuff like that. Being from just being from the south and being a military brat and mom, that that's something that was definitely ingrained in me. Yeah, you know that. Even though it's you know it Respect your elders. And that's what I always and I would I always tease people I was like, you don't have to say, ma'am, every time you talk to me just say mags, you know my name. Call me, Max. I'm fine.
Is enough? Is enough? Yeah, it's, I don't know. I would like to see. I would love if there's, if there's if there are companies listening to this people in customer service, customer success. Spread the word. Let's just Let's start doing away with those sorts of salutations. It. The world hasn't changed when it comes to gender. There have been gender has never been a binary. It's just more prevalent now. Because
it's been in the news. In internet and media, it's just the way that it is it just blows up and then everyone obsesses over it. But if we can just do away with that, and just find, I can't think of like, gender neutral things right now, because I'm tired. I was not expecting to be hosting. They weren't expecting. Yeah. But there has to be better ways to just remove gender from it. And it'll just make things so much
easier. If, like, I remember, at my last job, I was calling into like a water company or something like that. And the person on the other end of the phone just kept calling me sir over and over again, no matter how many times I corrected them. It probably happened six or seven times. And I get the point. I'm like, Look, at this point. You're just being rude. Like just flat out rude. This is I have corrected you several times. And I think even then, he's like, Oh, I'm sorry sir.
I'm like oh, yeah, it's just do away with it. And just make the will transcend humanity.
Exactly. There's a reason things are should be symbiotic. You know, and fluid and what is the amoeba? That's what we should be instead of set in stone. Yeah. And I don't think anything should be set in stone. No. You know,
that's that's actually I'm sure someone else actually did the quote, but it's a quote that I like for the tribute to me. Nothing is ever carved in stone only drawn in the sand. You know, I love it. I'm sure someone else came up with that before me. We can put Venice droughty after that and turn it into like a plaque and I'll make no money on it because someone else or license it ahead of me or something. I don't know. So you heard it here first, folks. Hi, Luna. Luna. Yeah. People
listening to this. The audio version on a podcast. Wait, what? Wait, Lunas here. No, no, not not that Luna. Lisa, stop. Just
very friend. Yeah. Yeah, this Luna is a cute furry friend.
Yeah. If you listen to this as a podcast, and you didn't know that we have a YouTube channel. Everything that you're listening to here is also on YouTube. And you can see our beautiful smiling faces. And our dogs. Yep. And see, doggy, doggy. So, yeah.
I won't move my camera. They're both out right now.
Yeah, I don't want to move money. If I turn it off. Back to our topic. Frankie.
Let's see if she'll come over. I know it's been time. Both of them. I know.
They're like, Mommy, it's been time. I would like other teachers that are listening to this. It'd be interesting if you wrote in or commented, or whatever. Just if you're impacted by the slots that are making you forcibly out people. How are you handling it? Max, do you have any friends that
I have the friends that will? I mean, I don't? Yes, I probably can find some friends on you know, from my past job and have to look and see how bad Texas has gotten with it. Probably pretty and I do have friends in other states that could be being impacted. So I'll put a call out and find out. Because it's you know, there are certain things that Yes, as a teacher, I would comply with meaning. If I knew a student was being abused, you know, that's a
law that that's hands down. And as a mother and My sister everything like that former formerly abused myself, Yes, I would do that I would make that call. I don't know if it's in every state, but I know when I started teaching. If we knew of a student under, I want to say 18. That was sexually active. We had to let the nurse know. And I'm sitting here going, but that's not my, that shouldn't be my job. Yeah, it should you know that. That's a number one that is a total personal choice for
that student. And that, and yes, I'm going to say this, it should be a conversation between that child and that child student and their parent, or parent figure caregiver,
or at least a trusted adult, or at
least a trusted adult. Yeah. Who's not supposed to who's not who shouldn't have to report it.
Yeah, exactly.
And pregnancies, I would go and talk to our social worker, our district social worker, and say, Are you aware. And if they were, it was a conscious conversation between the student and myself. My thing was, if you're not hurting yourself, you're not going to get hurt, or you're not going to hurt anyone else. What we talk
about stays between us. And unless this, you know, pregnancy, homelessness, something to that effect, because that's something that we can help with, we have, you know, we have those resources, somehow, some way we can get them. But if you were to come up to me, in your former self, and as my student and say, Mags, can you call me Vanessa, can you use she her pronouns? I would have said absolutely. Because I'm not going to, you know, as well as I
do. Number one. Teenage psyche is so fragile, no matter what kind of front they put up, yeah. But being in the LGBTQ plus community, is even worse, because you don't have as much acceptance as someone else may. And that was why, you know, that was one of the reasons I was always a safe haven. I offered that you know, and still to this day, I don't care love who you love, be who you want to be? Because I want you to be happy. And your authentic self?
Yeah, definitely.
I will admit, I struggled with that for a very long time, only because of the situation I was in with religion in my marriage.
And you're brainwashed, you know, to a point Yeah.
But even then, even being in the strict religion I was in, I was still very empathetic, you know, and everything and just might, you know, in my big thing, and you and I have talked about this, I don't understand parents who turn their kids away.
For they failed.
You know, that's, that's a huge parent fail to me. Yeah. And I struggle with that in my family, because I have a family member who is identifies as queer. And her mother does not want to accept it. And it's one of those things where I, you know, I struggle, because I see both sides of it. But I go back to what we talked about on a few episodes ago. It's not my decision. Yeah, it is me going in my own faith, and saying, Okay, what do you need me to do? So I can show love? Yeah. Use
the right pronouns. accept people for who they are, not what society wants them to be. And just tell them you love them. Give them hugs, or what regardless if it's air hugs or real hugs. Yeah. Because that's not always good. Yeah. That's what I strive to be. Yeah, then that's why I was adamant about being an ally.
That's why you're a great educator, for allies too. So it's, I feel so bad for these teachers in those states where it's being pleased. It's a police state. It's a Gestapo kind of thing. And how are they planning on enforcing it?
Well, my other thing is, how are they not seeing that history? He is repeating itself,
because the fascists never pay attention to that. Exactly.
But still, they're brainwashing, which is exactly what started World War Two. Yeah. You know, with Hitler's regime started brainwashing against a select group of people and thinking it's okay. Because we're going to be the better party. No, they're more selective than anybody else I know. Yeah. And
it's, it's maddening. It really is. And you teachers listening to this my heart, entire heart goes out to I fun fact about me, not only I did actually work at an online charter school in 2005, fun facts there, Mags. But in college, I was actually studying to become a history teacher. And I decided to switch to a history degree because this was 2001 2002 when I was starting that program, and there was not a single teaching job available in all of Ohio. And I'm sure
that has changed now. And I know a lot of places are having trouble finding teachers, because no one wants to fucking teach because of all this shit. And
the lack of pay. Yeah. The disrespect and all of this garbage about oil. If you don't report, you're gonna lose your job.
Yeah. So what's the incentive for them to stay there? They just moved to another state. Because a lot of a lot of progressives are moving to other states. For just safety. I know of a family that mother's biracial. And they're fleeing Texas because it's not safe for them. And I worry about you going back there. Yeah. But I worry about Tamsin going to Florida. I don't know where I
was there. But teachers currently Yeah, they're gonna lose the states you're gonna lose all the good teachers and who's going to be left over it's what I'm thinking they want that they just want to replace them with right wing zealots? Which I mean, we all know that a vast majority of teachers are fairly left wing. I don't know necessity because you see how the world really works. So who's gonna be leftover? Not many
people. But you're also having a lot of people moving out of those states and the red states are ready and red states tend to take tax money from blue states. So what's gonna happen when all the people that are really still bringing in money move out what's gonna happen to the states they're just gonna become it's gonna be mad max down there. So Oh, yeah, I hope you have an escape plan in case shit goes south. Because good,
nice is moving up here. So that's my escape plan is to go there. You know, I actually I laughed, I told a friend of mine I said, you know, being a snowbird has has its appeal coming up here during the summer. But then I'm like, and I don't really want to go with the political math. No, it's just it's I mean, it's scary on all fronts. It really
is. And everyone should be terrified. Even white sis white men, because you're gonna find yourself at a point where you're not whites. Whites is enough. If you are not the correct Christian, correct, whatever. You could be sent to a camp to whom
we call it the Founding Fathers if you're not related directly to the founder. Yeah,
exactly. Think I'm over on the Mayflower. And if you
ask me, the founding fathers weren't even white. They were indigenous native American. Because that's who we took the land from?
Yeah. If I had a plug in Instagram account, Lakota man I think it's Lakota under unscored man. Let me just hooked up really quick. While I'm talking.
I think I think I saw you post something by them.
Yeah. Come on. Lakota, Lakota underscore man. He is an amazing Instagrammer. I'm sure he's on other platforms too. And, obviously, he's of Lakota enrolled Lakota. And he just calls that shit out like his thing I shared today. It says it takes a hell of a lot of nerve for a third generation Italian immigrant, aka Rhonda Santas to point his finger and tell people to get the fuck out of his country. Wouldn't you agree? signed a 3003 to 33rd Generation Indigenous American. So
that's why no who it was when you said that?
We should get to a point where I mean, DNA testing is super simple nowadays. I mean, I have ancestry.com I have my own thing on there. And there's a lot of people in there that I don't know who they are. So one of my parents probably was having some fun, but fuck my parents, who cares. But they could use all that against us really does. Like mine. I grew up thinking I was Irish. Because I had like, No Irish in me. I have a little bit of English, but I have a lot of Nordic in
me, and a lot of German. And yeah, I'm a Viking queen. Okay, worship Me, worship me. Girls, get on your knees and worship me.
Well, in talking about that, I did the 23andme. So they have mine. I've got relatives. I'm like, Where the heck and how far back are you know, Where Are We Connected? Yeah, but I've always been told we had Scott. And you know, Scott and German. Well, when I got that back, I'm 98%. German, French from the outside area in Germany, which that my mom had told us. That's where, you know, we came from, but then I found out I'm 2% Egyptian. Just pretty badass. Which I'm like, I know
somewhere. I am a queen.
You are giving your bags
at German, French or no Egyptian.
Or all of the above? orrible? Yeah, yeah. What's
really funny is the story on I don't know which side of my mom's family was that an aristocrat had an affair with a chambermaid. And that's where one of my lines started. Make. So I mean,
that's, I mean, that's how it works here. You know, the Spanish came over and started essaying the indigenous people. And now there's just a mix, in
that the buyer. We're called the melting pot.
Yeah, exactly. But that was when I was trying to get to is like, you can go on there and see your percentages of what you are, where you're from. And who's to say that I'm going to total conspiracy theory right now. But at the same time, it doesn't seem that far fetched anymore with the way things are going. Who's to say that they just won't require a DNA test? And if you are not, if you have a certain percentage of or more of undesirable blood, what's going to happen to you, you know, so
I mean, it's, I'm sure it started before, but think about all the different experiments they did in the concentration camps. Trying to make the perfect race,
the Aryan Nation, which was so funny, too, because Hitler wasn't. He was he was a next. So he was a quarter Jewish if I remember right.
I think you're I think you're right. I know he had percentage. I just don't remember what it was. There was a I think it was a foreign advertisement. Yeah, I used to do the the TV show that here are the most popular TV ads in the world. They they did it like in the 90s, maybe early 2000s. And it was always the foreign ones were a little bit more risque than the American ones. But they had one that they pulled in a group of people and did DNA testing. And then they gave them
the results. Nobody was 100% Anything. Oh, no. There was a guy there who was a self proclaimed neo Nazi. And when he found out he had African American African blood, not African American African blood in him. I just remember him just being I think he was mortified. Yeah. It's always been brought up. You're 100% You know this. And now he had African blood and how many that it was not North
African. Egypt is far enough north that there were still a lot of the you know, the lighter skin blue eyes and stuff like that. Yeah, those type of traits. But any, it was like where did this come from? Like, dude, look at your lineage on your DNA file. You know? Yeah, you're out
whenever your ancestors. Yeah. So was with one of their slides. Somebody
who's 100% pure. You know, is that to me? I always take the Harry Potter no boasts
that Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's also fun JK Rowling just throw that out there.
I know. But I still love Harry Potter.
Yeah, guilty pleasure. I do too. I just, it's such a tricky subject to separate the artists from the art and artists. There's so much like anti semitic stuff in there too. It's just so we'll go with Harry Potter fanfic or something like that. But show me show me a one. Hey, show me your one. Your one is so. So rigid. Must muster give me a sock. What's this in the sock?
Is it seems Oh. I'm just getting laid out. I want to Hedwig. I just want a while. Yeah.
Okay. Amazing. really is amazing. That would be very fun to have another friend very convenient. You can just send messages and just said now friend. I forget where we were. My brain is just my brain doesn't work. before calculating this. Like, is this a shoot the shit part three, like now. Now this is this is a spur of the moment magazine Vanessa? Trying to come up with something. So mags had the idea of pronouns and like, Oh, that's a great
idea. Let's do it. But usually a little behind the scenes of transcending humanity is we usually start planning the episodes, we kind of have like a rough outline a few weeks in advance. And then whoever is the host of a week's episode is the boss that week, Max is the boss are supposed to be the boss this week. And of course, like the control, control freak, what did you call me that control freak? Control coordinator work? Yeah, yeah. The control coordinator
that I am. I of course jumped in and took over again, because it's what I do. But yeah, but then, like, the host will do an outline. And then we'll kind of work out the outline, especially if like we have a guest and we'll have like questions and stuff like that. And so the spur of the moment thing. It's actually happened. Episode 11 was also one of those the first ship the ship episode was actually supposed to be last week, we were only supposed to
have one ship the ship upset. So here we are kind of doing it again. But it's summer and schedules are kind of, you know, crazy. And so it's also pride month. Yeah, it is also pride month. So a lot of our lot of our members are speaking and Liam lost his voice he wanted to be on tonight, but he can't talk. Yeah. So she called me back around about the race and everything. It's I think, I think was a Terran. That said on one of the episodes recently that we're all just human race,
which we are. It's inside well just I can blood vessels and guts and shit. And the outside of us just covering it's, it's just a paint job. Essentially. Nothing more than that on. But take it with us. Yeah, exactly. And why society is so obsessed with color of people's skin. Only thing I can think of is it just boiled down to some white person just being jealous that someone brown skin is prettier than them. And it just fucking tumbled out of control because it just seems to be how things
happen. So that's my take on it.
I like that heartache. Yeah, because people friends jealous. Jealousy is what makes us do stupid shit.
Yeah, exactly. It's, there's no logical reason for it at all. no logical reason for racism, period. But it's baked into all of us. And if you're white, you're racist, whether you can admit it or not, because it's baked into all of us. Period hard stop. It's just what we've always been grown, grown around. We it is our responsibility to transcend it. But it's not easy and it takes a long time. I was raised in an
extremely bigoted family. I when I was running my family's business, my mother said do not hire black people. They're lazy don't hire black people. And just a spider I hired black people and lucky amazing but yeah, it's it's gross though. Why? Why not? You know, people that want to work, let them come have a job but then work
or is a great book. I follow this This gentleman on LinkedIn, his name is Abram X kendi. And he has a book called How to be an anti racist. And it's very good.
Oh, there's another book that people get let me go get it right back
such a cute dress.
Thank you. This one bite women by Regina Jackson and Sarah, I, I suck with pronouncing names. So stick around. Yeah, I mean, we're, we're connected on LinkedIn. I mean, chances are, they might listen to the show, too. But I just finally got this in the mail when I was out of town, so I can read it. And but this year, is will help white people, not just women, white people deconstruct what they have done, we should actually probably make this a book club book.
That works for me. Yeah. So I love this quote, I'm looking it up on Amazon as we're talking. But as long as you see yourselves as the default and everyone else as other, there's no next step. How powerful is that? Exactly? Wow. It's
it says right, uncover everything you already know about your own racism and how to do better. That's awesome. Yeah.
So I that when I get back from vacation,
it's, it's amazing. And yeah, so I like never read and I had started reading it and on a library copy, and I had to send it back to the library. And I finally just got this one. And like, I might read a book every four years at this point, I just, I just don't have the attention span for it. So but I need to sit down
audio or does that put you to sleep?
i It doesn't put me to sleep, but I can't concentrate on it. Like I love listening to podcasts. But I miss like half the podcasts when I listen to it just because I just want to go into my own little world. So I like reading. And I like reading a physical book and like being able to hold it. There's nothing wrong with eBooks. Ebooks are an amazing thing. They're amazingly convenient. Just for me personally, I can't get into them because I like like the
smell. I like the texture and just being able to just go back and easily flip back rather than have to scroll through a bunch of things. So that's been enough.
Press bookstores, and it's an actual company called How
to reduce to Half Price Books at booksellers.
They're still big in Texas from what I remember.
People read in Texas.
Hey, Hey, bud. I used to love walking in there and smelling.
Oh, yeah. There's a bookstore. I grew up in hoity toity town called Hudson, Ohio feel free that to Google that people you can see what I mean by hoity toity it's pretty fucking hoity toity. But there's a bookstore there that it's still there. And I highly recommend anybody in Northeast Ohio step by it. It's called the learned owl. And that's where I used to hang out as a kid I would buy red wall books if anyone's ever read red wall by Brian Jakes. And I love red wall
books. So I get a big collection of those and some lone wolf books in Calvin and Hobbes, tons of Calvin and Hobbes. Fun fact, Bill Watterson actually lived in Hudson for a little bit and one of his and one of the covers of one of his books, you can see Hudson's Clocktower, the Calvin is smashing through, especially giant Calvin spectrum through city. But we really got off topic on this episode.
So I can bring it back to pronouns.
Okay, yeah, let's close it up with some pronouns bring it back to pronouns, we're at an hour now. So
I'm reading literature, you know, old, older literature is always going to have the gender specific pronoun. But the newer literature that's coming out is more fluid. And I liked that. And that was something that when I was department chair, for my school, I tried really hard to try and build in, you know, the reader, the readers interests versus the teacher's interests, as long as we could stay within what we were allowed. And I don't mean that they would ban books or
anything like that. We just had specific things that we had to teach from. And so as long as we had those standards within there, I was able to bring in different authors, you know, the African American authors, the gender questioning authors, because at the time, they were not it was, you know, it was still Every a very new thing to be outed. And as an author, if you were LGBTQ for school books, you know, that was not and I hate the word outed. But it was not very common, but I always
tried. You know, let's bring in a different perspective. Yeah, bring in, you know, something like that. And make make it a more inclusive. And I never told my kids, no, I don't want you reading that. If they would come up for their reading book for the nine weeks or whatever, Hey, can I read this? Absolutely. Go for it. Yeah. But you'll see the changes and and that's what makes things more inclusive are when you're willing to make that change? You know, like we said,
at the beginning, use day. Yeah. Or ask if you can, you're seeing
changes, because against the wishes of the vocal few society is slowly evolving. And we were constantly being enlightened. There's a renaissance going on, but there's always been people that want to hold it back. I give it five years, we're gonna have another five years, it's just an absolute shitstorm. And then after that, I think things are really gonna start picking up.
But hope it doesn't take five years, but you're probably Yeah,
it's, it's gonna be a couple of election cycles, shits really gonna have to get bad for people that aren't trans. Some way people are gonna have to start getting hurt by policies for that. Because I mean, we're all guilty of it, that if it's not happening to us, we don't really pay that much attention. So and it's just, you hear of an earthquake in somewhere across the world, and 2000 people die. And yes, it's heartbreaking, but at the same time, we're like, it
doesn't affect me. And which is horrible that we think that way. Same with school shootings anymore, or just mass shootings in general, they happen so often, we're just like, I guess it's Tuesday now. But it's just spin everything back to pronouns. Pronouns, the best thing to do with pronouns is just don't make a big deal out of it. And just, it's, it's a way, it's part of who somebody
is. And you would be if you're someone that is upset about having to use pronouns, which we just use pronouns, it's part of the English language, it's nothing new, but for having to use pronouns. Just think of someone used the wrong pronouns for you. So in how you would feel, and would you want to be continually referred by something that you're not, and just fucking suck it up and just do it, it's not hard, it'll take some training. And we understand it's a trans woman, especially a
fairly. I'm only like, 19 months or so in my transition. So I still have a lot of changes still to go through. So I'm very as Erica says, like, she's like, I don't pass as a woman, I pass as a trans person, I'm in that same boat. So for some people, they struggle, I just very firm, I work on makeup all the time. But some people still struggle with that. And it's okay to struggle with it. But if you get corrected by anybody, not just the person who you're referring to say thank you, and double
your efforts. A good way to, to drill pronouns into your head, are whenever, like overuse pronouns when referring to somebody, like, use their name, so say, Mags, she did this and then she likes to do her homework. Just put in pronouns more frequently into what you're doing, just to kind of just you just have to reprogram your brain. That's all it is. It's just all about reprogramming. We're giant computers and our hard drives. Just need the fragmented. So they need to be
diffractive rebooted. Yeah, exactly. I missed those different things. I mean, the computer still have them, but they're not the same anymore as the wireless router. You know. Okay. Yeah. Do you have any final final notes? Oh, yeah. I
just I do want to make a plug. My friend, not not Luna. My friend Tammy. She owns a an LGBTQ friendly and owned shop in Michigan. Most of it is online. She does do the like the markets and stuff like that. But it's called chugs shop. Su G apostrophe bas shop with GPS and an E and she makes absolutely for nominal handmade bags keychains jumpers and she specifically does rainbow jumpers especially for pride.
And I actually just bought a beautiful silk sarong that I can't wait to get i hope i get it before I leave on my vacation because I would love to wear it and you can check her out on Instagram at skirt Ste RK dot Akers AC r e s or at her online shop which is WW dot shrugs. shop.com SUGSSHO PPE. I towny was amazing. She has the most amazing blue hair. I love it.
I'm looking at her now actually, it looks like her. I think you might have mentioned her personal account, but there is a Instagram account for for shortstop, sharp, it's hard to say it's SVG s underscore s h o p p e, I will link all this stuff in all of our descriptions and stuff too. So
and yes, she is amazing.
And I'm following her and I'm planning to add her shop to my bookmarks. So thank you for plugging that that is something that we definitely want to do is feature we're on businesses, minority owned businesses, all that stuff. So all right, thank you Max. For this impromptu pronouns and other such things I think is when I'm going to title the or we need some like creative like Lord or beings type thing but whatever. Now working title pronouns and, and other such things is going to be the
working title. Thank you for joining us. Thank you mags. You're amazing as always, in mama bear to all of us. Transcending humanity, Stan, mom, purple at the purple hearts that she loves doing. So please follow us. Tell your friends, share, comment, subscribe, all those things. It really helps us grow. And this is episode 1313 of what started in Max's over I'm not gonna even sure how it right now,
when that one politician essentially said let's commit genocide. Yeah, yeah, that pissed me off. And I contacted Liam because he was my initial contact. And I'm like, I this is this is the dream I had, what do we do? When that's when this all happened? And you took and ran? And I'm like, thank you.
Yeah, this started like that was in March. And here we are. end of June. We're recording this on June 28 and episode 13. And it's just fucking awesome. Keep writing in keep commenting. Just tell us what you think. And give us ideas for Yeah, give us ideas for episodes. If you're interested in being a guest let us know the contact form is right on our website transcending humanity that calm
Yeah, thank you again. In the past couple episodes I've been putting our full intro song and it just because I like listening to it so hopefully people I might do it again on this one then I'll go back to the shortened because it's kind of fun to listen to and then like wind it down after after the episode but so Okay, thanks, everybody. I rambled on too long. Have a great weekend or whatever it is whenever you're listening or watching this. I mean I can't