Episode 15 - Is It a Painful Process? - podcast episode cover

Episode 15 - Is It a Painful Process?

Feb 15, 202225 minEp. 15
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Episode description

In this week's episode, we discuss the processes of pruning, refining, and sifting. Sometimes people use these words to describe what God is doing in their lives, and sometimes it gets messy. These processes can also bring emotional and spiritual pain and discomfort. Allowing the Holy Spirit to clean the gunk out of our lives can be painful at times, but it is worth it because it brings healing and growth.

Mark 9: 43-47 " If your hand causes you to stumble, cut it off. It is better for you to enter life maimed than with two hands to go into hell, where the fire never goes out. And if your foot causes you to stumble, cut it off. It is better for you to enter life crippled than to have two feet and be thrown into hell. And if your eye causes you to stumble, pluck it out. It is better for you to enter the kingdom of God with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into hell,"

 Music: Savour The Moment by Shane Ivers - https://www.silvermansound.com 

Have the Best Week! Enjoy the Journey!

Music: Savour The Moment by Shane Ivers - https://www.silvermansound.com

The Equipped Man - https://theequippedmanpodcast.buzzsprout.com/share

Transcript

Hello and welcome to another episode of Upfront and Undivided with Luke and Dean'na. How's it going? Hi babe! Hi! Happy Valentine's Day! Happy Valentine's Day! It's been a good day! February 14th, 2022. Yep, just in case we need to, I guess, tell people that. Yes, just in case people are looking back. Yeah? It's true, because I was told a couple weeks back, so one of our sweet, sweet friends, he told me I was not allowed to say his name. Ah, yes. Okay, so you know which one I'm talking about.

And so he informed us that his podcast, Roll Out With Us, doesn't show up until Thursday. Yes. So, hey, happy Valentine's Day, friend! We love you guys. Yes. Especially the beautiful wife of yours and those cute little baby girls. All right. See? I didn't say your name though! That's right. See? All sorts of people we know. I kept, I mean, you know, that's no joke. That's true. Literally, that's like 90% of our friends. True. They come with children. Yeah. And they are a beautiful couple.

Yes. They really are genuinely one of our favorite people. They're just, I'm going to dote on them just for a second, because it's like, you know those people that you walk into a room and they light up when they genuinely seem incredibly excited to see you. Yeah. And they're just that family. That's true. They're just absolutely genuine from the inside out. I agree. They, I just, you always feel good. They could say, hi! And then you're like, yes! I can conquer the world, let's go. You know?

Yes. And so I just, I'm incredibly grateful that we have friends like that. Me too. So anyway, what are we talking about, babe? So today we're going to kind of go, it might not seem like it fits, but it does. Okay. So is it a painful process? Is it a painful process? Okay. Because let's let everybody in a little bit about what we kept going back and forth with, because we weren't sure. We were like, Valentine's Day, this is something we were wanting to talk about anyway.

We thought about talking about sex on this one, but we've decided- And intimacy. And intimacy. Yes, intimacy. Yeah. Because, yes. Yeah. And we were like, last week we really talked about like the kryptonite of people's lives and just kind of exposing those things and us becoming more familiar with the weaknesses in our lives.

This week, I think it's more of, you know, us being a little bit more strategic on maybe helping to undergird those things or at least maybe even purge those things out and like deal with them, right? Yeah. Okay. And not just deal with like weaknesses, but you know, life is seasons. Yes. You know, we're always going through seasons, you know, be it in life, be it in marriage, parenthood, church. Yeah. You know, we're always, you know, God is in the Holy Spirit.

They're always revealing what's in us and what's in our hearts and, you know, what are we feeding? And you know, it's, and sometimes we have to go through those seasons where we need to trim back. Right. We need to cut those things, you know. Recently, I heard somebody talking about, I think it was the parable of a fig tree. Yes. And how, you know, it wasn't producing fruit, so let's just cut it down.

Yeah. You know, and how I believe it was Jesus told the parable of, you know, on the vine, you want to cut off the branches that aren't producing fruit. Right. Because in reality, in life, when you prune, especially a fruit tree or any kind of plant, you actually make it healthier. You make it stronger. You make it able to produce more and better fruit. Right. It's like, I know your friend, our friend, your friend. Yeah. The fun story about the tomato plants.

Yes. Okay. So, for some of y'all that don't know, with a tomato plant, when it has the shoots and like, what is it, basically the vine part? Is it shoots or vines or? Yeah, those little, yeah, somewhere in there. Anyway, there's called sucker leaves that go in between like, I keep- The little branches. This is where I wish we had like, we're on video because I'm doing hand signals.

Yes. And I am a big hand talker, but it's like basically the branches, but there's always like this, the sucker leaf is what it's called. And if you do not prune those things back, it will take the nourishment from that plant. It will take it from the tomato and ultimately it'll either die or the tomato itself will become malnourished. It'll just, it won't grow to as full as the potential. Right.

Okay. The beautiful thing is that she also said, if you take that sucker leaf and then you separate it from the tomato plant itself and you start nourishing it, you put it in water, you can even plant it to itself. It will spring up and create its own plant. So it's like, kind of like what you're saying, it's not just a weakness situation. Sometimes it's like, I need to pull myself away from this so I can produce more, or I need to take this part of, you know, whatever is in my life.

Like I was telling on the way over, you know, cause we did our pin turning, which was so cool. Yeah. So cool. Very inspiring. Highly recommend everybody do that at least once in their life. We might actually have to go buy one of these things. It's amazing. I would not be sad. I know you wouldn't. I wouldn't either. That's true. I think Gabriel would dig this. She was incredibly impressed with our final products.

So anyway, so we're going and we're talking about like cutting back just even in the lathe, you know, it's we're cutting back the bulk, right? We're not destroying, we're just pulling out the full potential of what this piece of wood can be. Yeah. And ultimately shaving it down to where it's this beautiful. I mean, like we're talking about the, what did we did? We did three different sandpapers even you had the three, three, three, three, 20, the four, one, and then six.

And it was like, and the more that you sanded it, the smoother it became. Yeah. And then it's like here, I want to give you this white piece of cloth that was felt so good and put oil on it. And while it's spinning, you rub that oil on it and then you start seeing the luster and you start seeing the beautiful, even the grains, you see even the imperfections that become beautiful just under that, that salve of goodness that's just being rubbed on it.

And it's so, and it's also with the friction, the friction because it got hot. Did yours get hot? Yeah, it did. Okay. Cause I was like, I remember I asked him cause he's like, it might get hot. I'm like, is it supposed to get hot? He said yes. Cause it is like friction heat activated. Cause we're working with wood. I hate for this thing to like just burst in flames in my head. But it created the most beautiful piece of artwork basically.

And so it's one of those where it's like, we have to understand that that pruning process, it could be on multiple different levels. It's not necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes we think, oh my gosh, stuff is happening or oh my gosh, this person left out of my life or oh my goodness, I no longer have XYZ or this job or whatever, you know, fill in the blank. But all of a sudden it's like, you're going, ah, what do I do now?

And the whole time, you know, Holy Spirit or God is just like, I'm refining you because ultimately I know what's around the corner and I need, I need to prune some stuff out of you so that way you can survive and thrive and be healthy. Yeah, right. And kind of how you were saying survive and thrive. Yeah. Cause one thing I wanted to bring in with this was yes, it might feel awkward. It might feel weird.

And sometimes you might get that emotional hurt, but pruning and refining and these are not gentle process. No, they're not. You know, they are not gentle things. So sometimes it can feel painful. Yeah. Sometimes it can be rough.

Yes. I know when we were having a talk about this the other day, you know, kind of setting up our show, speaking of surviving and pruning, I went the extreme of those, you know, think of those mountaineers and you know, those hikers that, you know, they get caught in a rock slide or something and all of a sudden they're like, Oh yeah, I had to pull out my pocket knife and cut off my arm. Yeah. Just so that I could get somewhere to get rescued.

Right. You know, and sometimes, I mean, if you think about it, you know, Oh, we're pruning a tree. Right. We're cutting this branch off. And you know, a lot of times people don't think about it because it's a tree. Right. Trees don't have feelings. Right. Right. And sometimes when you cut that off, that, you know, especially if it's something connected to you, connected to your life, that can be painful. I agree. And yes, a lot of times it's necessary.

Yeah. Almost every time it's necessary for growth, for development. Right. You know, when you think about refining, you know, how is something refined? It's usually under pressure or fire. Yeah. So let's, let's completely melt you down. Yes. To refine all the dirt and gunk out of you. Yeah. Yeah. Tell me that's a pleasant process. Well, let's go into that because like with gold, when you refine gold, any kind of major metal, okay, you've played with wood or with metal before.

And it's like the dross, it's called the dross. It comes to the surface. Right. And so a lot of times when we're going through something and we stand back and we're like, literally all hell is breaking loose around me. What in the heck is happening right now? Yeah. And the whole time it's like, God's going, I'm pulling all of the junk to the surface. It's going to get worse, appear to get worse before it actually gets better.

Right. But I promise you, if you stay in this process with me, then you're going to come out because once you put that, refine that metal, it becomes stronger, right? It does. It's like you're getting impurities out, you're getting all of the weak spots out. And then eventually you melt it back down and it's like, there's no move in it. And so it's- And it's more valuable. It becomes more valuable. We as our lives become more valuable, I believe.

I believe we come from a place where it's like, you're no longer taking things for granted, you know? Because like we can coast. Our marriage, for instance, right? You know, we're about to come up on 10 years and living with you is easy. It really is easy. I mean, it really is easy. That being said, you and I had to prune some major stuff at the very beginning of our marriage.

There's still days that we prune things back, but once we've dealt with like the tap roots, we dealt with the things that would literally suck the life or completely destroy us. Once we said, God, I'm literally going to lay on your surgery table. I'm going to let you take that scalpel and dig out those soul ties, those things that would trip me up. I'm going to let you literally come in and rework me and remind me that I'm not these things.

You know, I'm not these weaknesses or I'm not these strongholds, whatever it is. And just it's like because we dealt with these things and we continue to deal with these things when we see the sucker, right? The little sucker leaves, we deal with them. We try to deal with them almost immediately. And what it does is it just makes things sweeter. It makes it easier to look at you and say, babe, I'm not okay right now. You know, I'm not okay. And then go, okay, what do we need to do?

Because now there's that strengthening between the two of us because we've both decided to walk through a refining fire just even in our marriage, not just separately, but together. Right. Thank you. And I know that oftentimes, you know, or sometimes not oftentimes, but there are times where the pruning, the cutting, you know, has to happen so that we don't fall back into our old pattern. Absolutely.

You know, it's like the, I know we talked about, it's basically the same verse in two different books, two different gospels between Matthew and Mark. Right. And I know you had it if you wanted to read it real quick. So basically, this is Jesus talking, right? And he says, it's Matthew 18, nine. It says, if your eye causes you to stumble in sin, pluck it out and throw it away from you. It says, remove yourself from the source of temptation.

It is better for you to enter life with only one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fiery hell. And I want to say, was it Luke or what was the other one? Mark and Matthew. Mark and Matthew. But one of them even went on to say like, you're cutting off your arm. I mean, you're sitting, you're talking about these, you know, these climbers. You have people that, you know, way back in the day, even now, you know, you get gangrene, gangrene in your body.

And it's like, hey, man, I don't want to lose any part of my body. And it's like the doctor's looking at you going, dude, if you want to continue to be breathing and to possibly thrive and live, I got to cut this off. It seems like an extreme, but again, we got to get the thing that's trying to kill you out of you.

And also kind of along those lines, you know, when you talk about shifting or not shifting, but like sifting, or you think about the threshing of wheat, you know, again, I know in some of the ancient times to when you were threshing wheat, you know, like on the threshing floor and all that. But what that is is basically when you harvest wheat, you want to separate the wheat kernel from the shaft or from the dirt or the just sticks.

And the way they would do that is they would either grab sheaves of wheat and smack them against the floor. Or they would get pitchforks and almost like throw it up in the air and let the wind take the trash away and the wheat kernels would fall to the ground. You know, yes, nowadays they have machines that do all that. But again, it's kind of sounds violent, a little violent. Let's smack ourselves against the floor or allow God to smack us against the floor to get the trash out.

Yes. Yes. So it's like, so it's like there's all these words that, you know, and I know sometimes in some seasons of church, they're like, oh, there's a shifting going on. There's a sifting of people. And you know, it always refers to, or not always, but a lot of times they refer to it as, you know, when people leave, you know, oh, they've been sifted out, you know. And yes, it hurts because sometimes those people are our friends.

But you know, sometimes they're just, they're called the other churches. They're called the other ministries. And so it's not really a bad thing, but we also need to allow that. Yes. You know, we need to allow that because yes, it's possible to go through this world and pick up zero dirt, zero dust, zero trash. But every now and then, I know a lot of us, we pick it up whether we want to or not. We have that kind of butt that it's sick to it. Like bad gum in a parking lot. It's so cool.

But it does. Every now and then we do. We need to get smacked against the ground, thrown up in the air, burned to liquid. You know, we need to have things cut off because if we don't, we can't grow. We can't learn. You know, again, it's like the idea of the gangrene. As you were saying that, I also thought of sometimes the people with diabetes, that sometimes it happens a lot in feet, but it's like their feet start to die. Like literally die.

Yeah. So, it's like if we're carrying around this spiritual trash, this emotional baggage that is weighing us down that we don't need, it is literally killing our spirit man. I agree. And if we don't either schedule a Holy Spirit surgery and allow God to take care of us or emergency hack it off, it's going to affect every area of our lives. You are right.

And whether you're in a relationship or hoping to be in a relationship, if these areas don't get taken care of, they're going to affect what you eventually want to accomplish. You're right. You know, again, you talked about us and a lot of the stuff that we had to go through. I know me personally, there was stuff that I could have very easily brought into our marriage.

And if I didn't take care of that, if I didn't let God take care of that, if I didn't listen to the Holy Spirit, we probably would not be sitting here right now. You're right. Same with me. I mean, same with me. That's what it comes down to. Again, you know, sometimes we say these words and we say these processes. It's a lot of times it's for them or, you know, we maybe talk about getting prayer to help us deal with this or help us deal with them that they haven't done it.

But again, we need to remember that these aren't always pretty, but they are necessary. Absolutely. You know, again, Jesus had all the power. He still has all the power. I said had as in when he was walking the earth. He could have used multiple ways of going into the temple and telling the money changers to get out. Right. What did he do? He sat there and he braided himself a whip and then he walked himself in there and started flipping over tables and smacking that whip. He got aggressive.

He got aggressive. Yeah. So if our bodies are temples and our bodies are supposed to be a reflection of God, how would he treat us different? Wow. If we're bringing that criminal spirit, that trash into his holy place, why wouldn't he be as aggressive with us? Yeah. I think it's again, it's one of those things where the beautiful thing about Jesus in his word he talks about where he comes with a two-edged sword. And I think of a scalpel, I think of a surgeon's like a skilled surgeon. Right.

So it's like when we talk about literally laying on the altar of, you know, and saying, God, I trust you to remove this stuff. And what happens is with that two-edged sword, with that scalpel, it cuts. So that's aggressive. Right. So it's like it's taken stuff out. The other thing about it though, it's bringing healing at the same time.

Right. So when we allow Jesus to come and turn the tables over in our lives, you know, he's basically saying I am going to do surgery here because I want to heal you. He did it to the people in the temple because he wanted, he wanted his, he wanted the temple to be healed. He wanted the church to be healed. And we as children of God, we carry that. And it's like, I love that. It's true.

So it's like, I think our big challenge for this week for everybody is just if you see something bubbling up or even while you're listening to us and something like hits, talk to him about it. Ask him about it. If, if something feels like it's extra extraordinarily hard right now, have a conversation. How do you want to deal with this? God, is it a pruning or is it a complete cutting off? Because I believe that that's two different things.

A pruning back is basically, I, you know, like you and I, our marriage being pruned, right? We're pruning things in our marriage so we can thrive together. A cutting off would be peace out, bud. We're done. You know, I don't need this part of me anymore. Does, does that make sense? And so that, that would be my, I could totally be wrong, but that's how I see it in my mind. When you prune something back, you're cutting things away, but ultimately so it can thrive and so it can live.

When, when, when we cut something off, it's like that season is done. That it's, it's no longer, it is no longer viable in my world. And so, um, maybe just we ask that the Holy Spirit just speaks to everybody right now that, that he just, he speaks to you in that place and that you find comfort even in the midst of the pruning or in the midst of the cutting, knowing that it is for your good. It's for, it's the good of you, for the good of those around you, for the good of the kingdom.

He wants nothing but good for us. And like any good father, discipline comes with it. There's a lot of times we have to correct our kids and we don't want to, but we know if we don't, it's going to create something inside of them that will destroy them later on. And he just wants to deal with those things so you don't get destroyed. That's right. Is that it baby? I think that's it. Yeah. All right. I love you. I had the best day today. I had an amazing day today. Thanks for being my Valentine.

And you're mine. I'm not trying to be mushy in front of you guys, but genuinely, I appreciate you, babe. Appreciate you. And we appreciate you guys. Yes. Thanks for listening. Again, we're pretty much everywhere you can find podcasts. Like, share, reach out to us if you want. I know some of y'all do. We appreciate it. We love talking with y'all. Yeah. We genuinely appreciate the feedback. Yeah. Big things coming on the horizon. Yes. For us and for you. Amen. Yeah. Have a great day.

Have the best week. And we'll see you next time. Bye.

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