Hello. Welcome to another episode. How was your week? Hope you had a fabulous week. This week, I want to talk about networking and in particular, why networking events are a waste of time. Yeah, I know the queen of networking has said it. I think networking events are a waste of time. And I get that right now. You might be wondering how on earth am I meant to build my multimillion dollar network if I don't put myself out there? How on earth? Am I meant to do this if I don't meet new people?
And if I don't attend these type of events? Janine, I get it. And really don't get me wrong. I still want you to put yourself out there. It just doesn't involve 30 second well rehearsed elevator pitches, and it does not involve plastic name tags. The main issue I have with networking events is that they push quantity Over quality. The idea is to walk away with as many business cards as possible, right? I get that. But how much do you really know about them? What are their interests?
What are their hobbies? What, what's going on for them right now? Do you really know anything about their business ethic and whether that actually aligns with yours? Whether you'd like to actually work with them right now? Do you know? What help they actually need and what's really, really going on for them versus the Instagrammable facade that's created to share the, Hey, look at where I've been photo on socials.
Now, I even remember hearing the most observed story while I was at an event where I was actually teaching networking at this event. So. And during this event, this woman approached me and after talking, she mentioned that to attend the session, her boss had said to her that to get the ROI on the session, she had to bring back 10 business cards the next day. It was like they were turning this connection event into something that was innately inhuman. Something that.
Literally became another measurable KPI. And my response to her was, you know what, you know, those bowls over there, as you come through the door, the bowls where everyone's sticking that business card in to win the free prize draw at the end of the evening. I said to her, go there, put out the 10 business cards. There you go. the ROI has been done for your boss and you may even win the door prize. Tell you it's crazy. It's crazy.
This concept of collecting the number of business cards and contacts that you can hopefully add to your LinkedIn profile or your chase list without even connecting properly with another person is totally absurd to me. Another example, I was at another speaking event and the MC decided to introduce me as the Queen of Networking and he went on to say, I know how you network. You've got two hands. You've got one hand for shaking and the other hand for handing out your business cards.
I'm like, what? It's crazy. Now we do have to go to these events. I get it. It's all part of business building. It's, it's something that some of us have to do. but I want you to see them as that, like the majority of these large format networking events are simply a meet and greet. There's simply a transactional lead generation exercise.
But if you're curious about networking in a more powerful way, this is why I encourage you to focus instead on creating a tight knit social circle that may not even have more than four people in it. this is how I've built my business. I've built my business by tapping into a tight, a high quality network that through the ripple effect of conversation, the connections actually happen. I very rarely go to large scale format events. So why is focusing on a small network great?
One of the main advantages of having a small network is that it actually frees up more time for you, more time and more energy to invest in meaningful relationships. When we have a massive network of connections, the risk is that we might feel obliged to attend every single event, to go to every single meeting or social gathering to maintain those connections.
Sometimes that hashtag FOMO may kick in the fear of missing out, but all of this can very quickly become time consuming and energy draining. Something that you might've heard me speak about before on this podcast, where I talk about stretch fatigue, that feeling of being pulled in multiple directions. The opposite though, of having a small network of people that we can actually focus on, where we can build deeper, more authentic relationships with those people that truly matter the most.
That's where the opportunity exists. I say embrace the hashtag JOMA or the joy of missing out. On large scale format events, and instead build a tight network of small quality group of people. The other opportunity of this is that we can be really intentional. Building a small network enables us to be much more intentional in our relationships. When we have a vast network of connections, it can be a challenge to maintain meaningful connections with every single person.
However, when we focus on building a small but powerful circle, we can invest more time. We can invest more energy into cultivating those relationships and as a result, create a more significant impact with the world. And finally, having a small network helps us to become more authentic and true to ourselves. When we've got a massive network of connections, we might feel the need to present ourselves in a certain way to fit in or to be accepted.
However, when we build this small network, a powerful inner circle, we can be more authentic. We can be true to ourselves. But when you have a large network, you've got to, work harder at this. So here are my three quick tips. For consciously connecting so that you can build a network that is based on quality and not quantity. Number one, It starts with four people. You've heard me speak about this before and I'm reiterating it.
It's something I reiterate time and time again, your quality network starts with four people. To create a network that is really going to help you grow. You need at least four people, not family. No significant other, but people that fill one of these four roles, four independent people, you need a teacher, that person who is stretching your thinking so you know more and that you can build your competitive advantage.
You need the promoter, the person who encourages you to do more and pushes you towards your goals. They believe in you. They see more in you. Then you see in yourself, you need the pit crew, the person who is going to be there through thick and thin, who keeps you grounded and keeps you present in the moment. And you need the butt kicker, the person that's going to hold you accountable and keep you focused.
The person that's going to make sure that you're doing the very thing, the right things that you need to do today to move forward into tomorrow. And if you don't have these four people in your network, that's exactly where you need to start. The second tip is with this smaller type network, embrace the "thank you for" concept.
If you want to reach out to someone after being at an event or after reading a book or consuming a piece of content about them on social media, then send them the words, thank you for, and insert the very thing that you're thanking them for. These words, thank you for, are a game changer. Think about. Why you admire that person. Think about what impact they had on you. Think about what they shared that you loved or that resonated and share that with them in the form of a message.
Thank you for, and I can guarantee that this genuine connection is going to make way more impact than a normal slew of messages that might land in their inbox. And the final thing is look for opportunities to Be the little fish in the big pond. So many times I see people hanging out with the same people all of the time. It's almost like they outstay their welcome. They get to this point where they're not learning anything new. There's a little bit of group think that kicks in.
And essentially we're all keeping each other at that same level. That's not a space for growth, just like jobs and homes and clothes. Eventually we can outgrow our network. And while that might leave many of us. If you're feeling lost, it actually does provide the opportunity for us to reach out, to be brave, to put yourself in a place where you're the small fish again in a bigger sea.
And whether you take this as an opportunity to invest in group mentorship or simply start showing up in places where you would like to be more often, look for those opportunities to be pushed. The people that you meet in that room are very likely to be the key players in the next Stage of your growth. So rest assured that keeping a close knit circle isn't hindering your business growth at all. It isn't stopping your opportunities at all.
It's time to take an audit of your network, of your time and energy that you're putting in. See where the gaps are for connection and start consciously connecting with the people that you want In your life and to be part of your life as this next growth in your business. I'd love to hear what you found most useful in today's podcast. Share below, share this podcast with anyone that you think would find it useful.
Love you to leave a review, send me any questions and have a truly awesome week until next week.