What if we recognized the ambition inherent in motherhood? What if we normalized corporate career pauses? What if we didn't let ourselves be defined by the false mommy wars created by the media between work at home moms and work outside the home moms? Today we have Neha Ruch, creator of Mother Untitled, the leading resource for ambitious women leaning into family life. They are on are on a mission to update the perception of career pauses and downshifts for motherhood, infusing this life chapter...
Jan 25, 2024•43 min•Ep. 71
Social media is political. That is a fact. You may think you're following beautiful images of a woman breastfeeding her baby in the Costa Rican jungle while her nine other children wait patiently by the waterfall, but pay closer attention and she is telling you not to vaccinate your children or use birth control. You never know who is behind a message or who is boosting information and accounts behind the scenes. Emily Amick, of the account Emily in Your Phone breaks it all down for us in the sa...
Jan 23, 2024•45 min•Ep. 70
Welcome to Sunday Nice Things.....a bonus episode where we share a podcast we love, a book we love, a rant we have to get off our chests. It's a nice thing for Sunday because we deserve them. This week we have an episode of The Cult of Perfect podcast from my friends Sara Petersen and Virginia Sole Smith. The Cult of Perfect explores the intersection of motherhood, public performance, and bodies, and tries to figure out what our addiction to the idea of perfect says about us and the world we liv...
Jan 21, 2024•1 hr 17 min•Ep. 69
Until about six months ago I didn't know that the Mrs. America pageant existed. And when I did some research and found that it originally judged contestants on their domestic acumen it felt a little trad wifey to me. When I talked about it on an episode I was contacted by a listener named Chloe Rosen, AKA Mrs. New York. And she wanted me to know I was wrong. She wanted me to know that there is way more to the pageant than I talked about and that the contestants are bad ass women who deserve reco...
Jan 18, 2024•45 min•Ep. 68
You know who is alive and well on Instagram? Jesus. And I say that without judgment, but it is true. Whether you realize it or not religion, namely Christianity, is being repackaged through beautiful images of motherhood and parenthood on social media. Today we talk to Kelsey Kramer McGinnis, a reporter for Christianity Today who has been researching Christian social media, #tradwives and images of "good motherhood," that quietly promote religious beliefs. Because many of these images look so be...
Jan 16, 2024•48 min•Ep. 67
Social Media anxiety is now a staple of many, many, many conversations in therapy. People come to the couch to talk about how Instagram and TikTok make them feel left out, make them feel left behind, make them feel shame and guilt. It's a lot. Today we have on clinical therapist Lauren A. Tetenbaum, LMSW, JD, PMH-C. Lauren works with women (usually post-partum) and other caregiver she has seen a massive spike in people wanting to talk about how to deal with all of the crap they feel because of s...
Jan 14, 2024•44 min•Ep. 66
Nanny shaming in mom Facebook groups, parents hiring $125 private investigators to spy on their caregivers, nannies losing their jobs because of an anonymous tip. Welcome to the nanny wars on social media, where everyone is always watching and the littlest victims, the kids, are caught in the middle. Today we talk to Jen Wieczner of New York magazine about her excellent story on the chaos that ensues after a parent posts about a “bad nanny” on Facebook. This isn't just a parenting story. It is a...
Jan 11, 2024•1 hr•Ep. 65
Who chooses what we see on social media? Instagram (META) and other social media companies have the power to pick and choose what images they want to show. They also have the power to stop showing your posts to people if they don't like the content. The problem is that there are no real rules for what they don't allow you to post. This week Jo posted a picture of a book cover (Glynnis's new book I'm Mostly Here to Enjoy Myself ) that showed a beautiful painting of a naked woman's backside. Insta...
Jan 10, 2024•48 min•Ep. 64
It's Dry January time for a lot of people. What better time to dive into the world of sobriety influencers. Finding sobriety is different for everyone. It's a journey. These days Instagram and TikTok have become a big part of getting sober. Suzanne Warye started out as an influencer on her page @MyKindOfSweet by posting her workouts and her outfits. When she experienced post-partum depression she was shockingly honest with her audience about how hard it was. The response was so positive that she...
Jan 08, 2024•27 min•Ep. 63
Why do we care about an influencer baby we will never meet? Ballerina Farm just gave birth to her eighth child.....and the Internet can't handle it. Well, social media can't handle it. The famous influencer's mom announced the birth and now all the influencer message boards are going crazy over it. But why do we care? Why do we care about a woman we don't know and a baby we will never meet? I would argue that influencer babies are the new celebrity babies. They command the same kind of attention...
Jan 04, 2024•30 min•Ep. 62
If you are potty training a child these days social media is probably serving you all sorts of potty advice. One of the most surprising accounts we have come across is one encouraging diaper free potty training from infancy. Let's put aside the method for a minute and just call out the fact that this is an account that regularly posts images and videos of children in their most intimate moments...using the potty, or failing to use the potty. We talk to Washington Post and Teen Vogue reporter For...
Jan 01, 2024•38 min•Ep. 60
Is there anything lamer than New Years’ resolutions? Part of me thinks that New Year's resolutions are bs. And the other part of me thinks, you know what I’ll try anything to make life easier and better and more enjoyable. As I always say, many things can be true at once. It IS nice to have a time of year when we can renew and revive and just set some goals for ourselves. And so I have gathered some very smart women to tell me their plans and intentions for the coming year. Learn more about your...
Dec 29, 2023•16 min•Ep. 61
Let's settle this debate once and for all...is #TradWife content actually dangerous, or just stupid? Today I talk toThe Cut's Brooding columnist Kathryn Jezer Morton about her column on this very subject. Spoiler alert: I think it is dangerous and here is why. #TradWife content on social media strips the idea of motherhood of all of its unseen, really hard labor, and makes it look like it is just beautiful and clean and easy and sourdough kneading all the time. We rarely, if ever, see the men or...
Dec 26, 2023•45 min•Ep. 58
A story went viral on the NY Post and Reddit in the past 24 hours claiming that a husband left his wife because he became OBSESSED with a #tradwife on TikTok. This is the headline: TikTok ruined my husband of 12 years — now he wants a ‘tradwife’ and we’re getting divorced. We clearly had to do an emergency episode about this and I couldn't think of a better guest than my own husband, Nick Aster, who is constantly confused by #tradwives and social media in general. Is this for real? (probably not...
Dec 21, 2023•25 min•Ep. 59
Breaking news over here. After months of anticipation, Ruby Franke, the mom influencer who was charged with abusing and starving her children, finally pled guilty to child abuse. In court, she expressed regret and sorrow for her actions, revealing that everything she did was, disturbingly, an act of love. New details of her abuse emerged in Franke’s plea agreement and they are terrible! But the story keeps getting weirder. As part of her plea deal Franke will testify against her business partner...
Dec 19, 2023•15 min•Ep. 57
Will daycare give your kid attachment issues? Are you breastfeeding wrong? Is sleep training the worst thing you can do as a parent? Being a mom often feels like you've failed at something at least once a day, sometimes more. Women are judged and shamed for so many of our choices. How we deal with that judgement and shame is often up to us. I have turned to experts like today's guest Emily Oster so many times during my parenting journey to dispel my own guilt, shame and the misinformation surrou...
Dec 18, 2023•39 min•Ep. 56
Welcome to an Under the Influence - Too Much Money crossover episode! By now you've probably heard about the $59 million wedding that has everyone going crazy on Instagram and TikTok. The bride, Madelaine Brockaway seemed to come out of nowhere with her gonzo bananas wedding content that included a performance by Maroon 5, a rehearsal dinner at the Palais Garnier opera house, and a sleepover at the Palace of Versailles. Prior to the wedding, guests were invited to attend a private party at Chane...
Dec 14, 2023•49 min•Ep. 55
How many of you remember the Katie Sorensen story? Maybe you don't remember the name, but you might remember the episode we did a couple of years ago about the mom influencer in the Michael's parking lot who falsely accused a Latino couple of trying to kidnap her kids to get more viral attention for her Instagram account. Katie's trial for making false claims only happened this year and reporter Emily Guerin has been covering it for the LAist podcast Imperfect Paradise. Today we get all the upda...
Dec 11, 2023•47 min•Ep. 54
No one should ever shame you for how you parent on Instagram. I have said it before and I will say it again—if you feel shamed then it is time to unfollow. Today we talk to Dr. Cara Goodwin, PhD, a licensed psychologist and mother of four, with a passion for parenting grounded in science and love to debunk the biggest Instagram myths and lies. We're going after whether screentime breaks your kids' brains (nope), whether you should make your kids say thank you (I still think so), Whether time out...
Dec 08, 2023•53 min•Ep. 53
In this incredibly brave interview we speak with a woman who considers herself a former trad wife. She got married young and had kids young. Her husband convinced her to quit school, to stay home, to take care of the kids and to give up all agency when it came to their finances. When she wanted to leave the marriage she didn't have the education, work experience or resources to do it. But she made it work and now she is on the other side. She still feels like she is playing catch up as a 41 year...
Dec 04, 2023•34 min•Ep. 52
The postpartum period is a clusterf*ck dumpster fire of hell and do not let anyone tell you different. It is also magical and wonderful and life-changing and gorgeous. Many things can be true. This is all of my advice for how to survive the newborn period and a chat with the incredible Tara Clark of Modern Mom Probs who consistently makes me feel seen as a mother in a world that too often turns a blind eye to us. Send this one to every prego and newborn mom in your life. They need it. You can fo...
Dec 01, 2023•59 min•Ep. 51
Does the Internet fundamentally hate women? Social media platforms can be a battleground, often subjecting women to harsh criticism and verbal violence. And no one knows that better than tech reporter, author and general Internet bad ass Taylor Lorenz. Taylor has been called a lot of things online. She has been lauded as one of the nation’s preeminent tech reporters for places like the New York Times and the Washington Post. She has also been called the scum of the Earth. Told she was ugly. Told...
Nov 27, 2023•44 min•Ep. 49
Mini bonus for anyone who needs a post holiday reminder that you're amazing and no one should tell you any different. Parenting advice influencers are ubiquitous these days. And they are spending thousands of dollars to boost their posts to get them in front of you so they can shame you into feeling like a crappy parent and then sell you their courses where they teach you to be your kids' therapist. You really don't need to be their therapist. You need to be their parent and Jo is getting off th...
Nov 24, 2023•14 min•Ep. 50
In our constant quest to stay connected, Instagram and other social media platforms have become staples of our daily lives. Yet, there is a growing counter-movement of folks who have chosen to break free from the shackles of these platforms, daring to live a life beyond the 'like' and 'follow' buttons. But what does life on the other side of social media look like? The writer, author and bad ass creative Marlee Grace is one of the brave few who have dared to step off the social media stage. The ...
Nov 20, 2023•50 min•Ep. 48
Back in July, an Ohio plastic surgeon lost her medical license after the state medical board investigated her for live streaming operations on TikTok and causing harm to patients in the process. TikTok fans may know this doctor by the name Dr. Roxy. She gained millions of views and followers over the past few years by live streaming plastic surgeries from her office. Surgeries like liposuctions, implants, and butt lifts. You can read Judith Newman's piece on Dr. Roxy on The Cut here . To sponsor...
Nov 15, 2023•28 min•Ep. 47
Jo has made a new podcast and here is a sneak peak of the first episode. From Jo Piazza and Doree Shafrir, the host of the hit podcast Forever 35 comes TOO MUCH MONEY. Too Much Money is a podcast that attempts to answer this question by telling stories about people who have more money than they know what to do with, and use it in ways that are sometimes foolish, often petty, and often ridiculous. Each week, Jo Piazza and Doree Shafrir go deep into the story of one of these extremely rich people ...
Nov 14, 2023•47 min•Ep. 46
What are you afraid of? Today we are talking about fears and finances. Because our phones are listening to us all the time they can probably hear us when we voice these fears out loud. Jo has recently been served a bunch of financial influencers who want to sell her advice to be a millionaire in a $500 course. These finance charlatans are preying on all of our very real fears. Thankfully we were able to call up an actual personal finance expert and the author of the new book on fear, A HEALTHY S...
Nov 13, 2023•55 min•Ep. 45
I want to tell all of you moms out there something very important today. You are a good mom, a good parent, a good caretaker. You are good. You are good at taking care of your children. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Nov 10, 2023•12 min•Ep. 44
Are trad wives happier than the rest of us? So many of the women I know who are bad-ass boss babes struggling to juggle it all—career, relevance, fulfillment, being a good mother, being good at work, being OK at being a wife—are really unhappy and anxious. I don’t believe in being submissive to your husband and I don’t particularly want to stay home and be the sole caregiver for my children and the only one taking care of my house. But I have been hearing from many traditional wives who say THEY...
Nov 09, 2023•49 min•Ep. 43
Subscribe to the Over the Influence newsletter HERE for episode transcripts, bonus content and more of my ramblings about weird stuff on and off the Internet. And order your college roommate a copy of The Sicilian Inheritance to make up for that Pearl Jam CD you never returned. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices...
Nov 06, 2023•50 min•Ep. 42
