I’m Having Your Baby (RHODubai Recap)

Two teas in a pod which Teddy Mellencamp and Tamra Judge.

Welcome to another episode of Cho Cheese and Pod with myself, Teddy Mellencamp and Tamra Judge. Dubad Bae Dubai, Wow, Dubai Dubai. I kind of was hoping that Dubai was going to come in with some Salt Lake City energy.

Well, I think they're a lifestyle show. I really do. I think they're a lifestyle Can we go over the professional looks?

We can? But first, do we think that Dubai was a breath of fresh air after watching Jersey.

I don't think.

It was horrible, even though the rating is only four hundred. I had a lot of people when I put it out there, A lot of people go, oh, I forgot it was on. I forgot it was on. So it has been what two years or something like that since Dubai's been on our screen, so I think people kind of maybe forgot a little bit. It was good for a first episode, that's for sure. I mean, if anything, the confessional looks, which by the way, some got two or three in the first episode.

But by the way, if you're fighting over who's closer to Beyonce. I mean, this is the VVIP who stood the closest, who could actually get water spilt on them from Beyonce, who fell down at the Beyonce.

The amount of time they spent this episode talking about Beyonce, it.

Should have been a drinking game. We would have been blacked out.

I loved Caroline's cat suit, the Leopard catsuit. I wasn't quite sure. I don't think the thing on the top of her head, the hair on top of her head really came across like it did in person on TV. It looks like she's got a cinnamon roll on the top of her head.

Hold on, but both of our looks she has cinnamon rolls on top of her now.

The other one's like a one's cute.

And that dress that's that one's an ice cream cone.

Okay, the orange dress Kyle wore that I.

Think last week I borrowed it.

Okay, how about the how about the Madonna boobs? I wonder if that would hurt I'm not really sad on it. I have to be honest.

Yes, are all of the confessional looks interesting to look at.

They're over the top. I think the best best, best best is Caroline Stansbury with a leopard catsuit and the orange I think it is orange red.

But can we know the new Girls? The only one that didn't get too confessional? I love her. Can we talk about Sarah's purple prom gown? Would you like a full body confessional? I feel like that would be very uncomfortable for a full day. Well, we do get really sweet.

We do knees up, we do knees up now. So you want to talk about their taglines? Sure, okay, Caroline stands Bury. The only thing old about me, Darling is my money. Sarah and the land of excess. I find my riches within Toleene, take it from me. If you know how to stay chill, you never get burned. Caroline Brooks I may be building glass houses, but you'll never see me crack. Lisa Malan, The desert might be hot,

I like the taglines, but the one you said maybe it was Sarah's. Can you read it again? Because I feel like we've heard this tagline from someone before, something very similar in the.

Land of excess. I've found my riches within. So yeah, Jar said something like this, some of them were kind of recycled.

Yeah, well then I do. I do think watching their confessionals, I watched my self esteem tumble a little bit, because even if I put so much effort into a confessional, I'm not sure I could ever pull off such a leak.

Oh no, no, nobody could. But so de Retz was I believe in excess of everything except moderation. Yeah, it's kind of similar to Sarah's. Somebody ripped off mine too, something about the best thing about it's because you're an eyeicontact or something like that. I know, I know. Evidently Carlos King just did a podcast and gave me all kinds of credit. Thank you, Carlos. Oh, I'm the hottest housewife in Beverly Hills.

Whose is that? That is the worst?

Yours?

I did not say that.

I did not say that.

Who wrote that as a confession? As a not a confessional.

His first season? First season?

No, Tamera, you did not say I'm the hottest housewife in Orange County.

How could you not know that? That's like a line that's that wasn't even that wasn't that wasn't even written for me. That was me being a smart ass in scene, just being a smart ass, and they used it as my tagline.

I'm so embarrassed for you. I know, I really am.

Oh but wait then they had me say later on I don't know season seventy five, that was on, I'm still I'm still the hottest houseway.

Oh yeah, Well, I mean you weren't wrong, but it's still really bad to say say about oneself.

Oh do you think I'm the hottest twat or just a twat?

True either way. Well, then Chanelle and Lisa meet to pay Padel. Well, why did they say that they are as close as God and Jesus. They don't seem close. They seem like the age. And I feel like Lisa was so pissed in this moment that Chanelle came in such an outfit, when she was just in the alloy dress that you and I own. She was like, damn it, it's working out.

Danelle's look when she came to the place, Padel was like that, I've never seen a tennis skirt because to your knees.

I need to know what the weather condition currently was.

And by the ninety five. And by the way, had I warned that one that went to the knees, it would have went to my ankles.

You wouldn't need you wouldn't need your cinnamon roll butt to go with your long ankle skirt.

Only she could pull that off. Yeah.

Uh.

Then we get to Caroline and Sergio, who have been married for a year. It's been over a year and they are still building their new home. Last year at Caroline went through IVF and she has one baby boy embryo on ice SGI is very eager to have a child, and she is not. When she says Sergio's ovaries are on fire, tears came out.

Okay, wait a minute, would you want to have a child if you were Caroline?

Well, okay, kids are older? How old are they? Because we don't see them on the show.

Teens and up like they're older.

Well, let me put it to you this way. Okay, who is like a hot young actor? Right now? Let's come up with somebody that I would think is really hot and young. Austin Butler. Let's say that I were to get a divorce tomorrow and I was to end up with Austin Butler, and he really wanted to have a child, I probably would do it. But if Edwin asked me to have forty eight, if yes, and if I was rich and I could have some help during the beginning.

You mean like a gut.

No, I if my embryos are young and my body is old, I'm okay doing it.

No, no, damn.

So you're saying you wouldn't by a baby for me if I ended up with Austin Butler?

What cover want to carry a baby ever again in my life?

Nor can I? No?

I would, I would have a Sarah gut.

I can't wait for this press article to come out. Teddy Mellencamp wants to have sex with Austin Butler and have his baby or Teddy's pregnant.

If Matt Damon.

No, Matt Damon has his own kids and he's older. He is not a correct person, did I?

I did tell you what Spencer said?

Right?

No?

Somehow in my we were driving somewhere in my car. My display came up to Teas in a pod Teddy Mellanco whatever, and he goes, isn't that your friend that's lept with Matt Damon?

You know what, Spencer?

And I'm like you know that, are you a freak? You're probably listening to my podcast.

No, because you told people and then it went everywhere, including my father. So now I can't even lock my look my dad in the eye.

By the way it made CNN, I know, I don't know. I feel like I don't know that this is ever going to happen. The child thing. I don't think that she's really that into it. I mean, their relationship is cute, they spend a lot of time together. Their Instagram is crazy. I don't even know how they film all that stuff.

Well, I got to say this though, like even when very crazy, I'm trying to think long term, Like when we even are talking about my younger new potential husband, Austin Butler, he is doing probably better financially than I am. So it's still a very different situation. But if I were to go, so you.

Want the child sport, let's be honest, Teddy Butler.

Teddy Butler, No. But my point is if I am also the breadwinner, I we don't know how long I'm going to be able to do that and have a child and run our Instagram account. That's a lot to expect of me. But that's why I would have to pick somebody like Austin, but I couldn't pick it up when.

You marry, mister Butler, are you going to put like you're gonna have a prenup? And it says if we break up, you get this child. I don't want it.

If we break up before this child is seven, it's yours, it's yours. Keep it after seven it's fine, and you have to pay me until it's fifty seven and I'm dead, Thank you. Mister.

Are we naming this child?

What should we name it? What goes well with Melanchamp.

Butler, Elvis Springstein, the cooks.

Oh my gosh, we have to give this guys. We love Dubai so much that we've been talking about ourselves for yeah.

Okay, okay, let's get back. We're only on the second topic here. Oh my god.

Okay. The glass house has been opened for three miles and business is booming. Brooks didn't invite Lisa or Chanelle to the grand opening. Zoron, Caroline's ex husband was the contractor, and she has them come over to fix some lights in the toilet.

Do you like that? She said it was a star studded event. I was like, show me the picture, where's Beyonce And they show Caroline stands very well, that's how she got good tickets.

Oh my gosh. Then we get back into Sarah having her spiritual healing. Her name is Sarah Sah, just like Patara.

She's doing spiritual healing for the past five months and has seen a huge difference. You know, I always thought about going to one of those like classes where you learn to love yourself. But then I think that what would I bitch about if I loved myself?

Listen, I thought, I watched you get spiritually held last and it didn't work. I'm done.

Out of all the women, I am having all the woman. The woman hardest time connecting with Sarah well because she's.

Full of shit. She's just a shady like us, trying to pretend that she's going.

That's the truth.

That's too hard.

No, but it's true. This is It really bugs me when people pretend that they are above everything else and you're the spiritual what. No, So you must have a lot of Yogi friends, I mean, please, but I don't know. It all feels like a bunch of boloney to me. But she is calling in her next boyfriend, who I I think we saw in like an upcoming trailer or something. He's hot. Lisa casually building a website while on a business call, while sitting in a lawn chair while her

Yeah, that's like the best way ever to get something onto the show is to not try to get something onto the show. You have to be very discreet. Yeah, don't talk about it. Don't we talk about it. You just walk in with the new venus Seltzer happy place and you just pour it as you're talking to your husband or arguing with him, and just be like, yeah, what's that? What is she pouring?

Then Chanelle brings Stanbury a pineapple, saying it's just like them, prickly on the outside suite on the inside. The two of them had a terrible year and now are starting over. Chanelle says she was attacked after opening up. We spoke about this when we had Chanel in the pod, and she spoke about it so eloquently. I don't think there is a way that we can repeat it in a way that will give it justice. But they do talk about it and I do love Chanelle and Stanberry as

Wait, I have something to tell you. What I just found out that my mom is fifty, so that makes me twenty five, So you're actually older than me.

Oh.

Then we get Caroline Brooks meeting up with Toelene, one of her closest friends in Dubai. Telene lived in La for nine years and moved to Dubai. Caroline says that Stanbury called her after the Atlantis event, saying that Telene fell over and had her legs in the air. Do we think that? I mean, I've been pretty schlockered in front of Stanbury before, and I've never really and I've seen her pretty drunk before too. I don't really think she's the judging. She may have just been telling a story.

No, I think no, not at all, not at all.

But Brooks made it seem like that. Bruce made it seem Yeah.

I didn't like that. I feel like she was just searching and reaching and trying to stir up something, and I was like, come on, but.

I also know what I was reaching for. Preparing for Toleene's Housewives music career and three two one, I cannot wait it's coming.

I like her. I like her a lot. I feel like she just it's flawless. She came in, there's no hesitation, she's not boring, she understands the assignment. She's going to go far.

I all kept like, yeah, if the show makes it so well. She I also liked that when she I forgot what she was saying, but she was kind of talking like bragging or something, not bragging but name dropping or something. And then she goes, sorry, guys, I don't know why I'm name dropping like she's She's.

Like, I like her. She's one of those housewives that just it's it. She's not one of those housewives that's on and they have to work with her for three years to try to get her to open up. Those are the ones I don't think should even have the job.

But anyways, Yeah, but then the Telene falling over came up again, and this is where I really don't think Stanbury cared because she even goes, Sergio saw your vagina when you fall over, and she didn't seem upset by it, and you know what, neither did Tolene. But Brooks seemed a little, a little overserved at this lunch, seemed like we may be seeing her vagina at the end of this lunch this rate. But then we get into Sarah

Do you agree with Shanel that what Sarah said in the press was wrong.

Yes, I think the way in which she said it was very wrong, I think. And I also don't think Sarah out did a very nice job of explaining why she never yeah, kind of like fostered any of that relationship or conversation afterwards.

So, after watching the first episode, who's your favorite and least favorite?

At this point? I love I love Tolene. Tolene's going to be a breakout.

She's going to be a huge star.

This is what I can say. I don't I don't have a favorite, but I don't really dislike anyone. If I was gonna say, someone bugs me, Sarah Sarah because she feels I need her just to be a hot mess like the rest of us and not try to always pretend that she's better than everyone.

I mean, can we talk about the clothes you're wearing the ninety four degree heat?

I don't know, I feel like we and they weren't even sweating.

They obviously are used to it.

I would be got to be used to because I'm sweating in this room and at sixty eight degrees right now, and the light keeps going out, which is making me feel frightened.

Well, Cosmic Steeple on Instagram says Dubai was giving classic housewives funny, glam, petty, drama and friendship good they have a fan yeah, and Nate toomms two to four s Sarah would take should take accountability for hurting Chanel and stop being so selfish.

That's all she had to do was say listen, I I didn't realize you were going to open up. And then I should have followed. I don't know. She should have said a million things that she did not say.

Yeah, I think it was a good start. I'm not gonna lie. I think it was a good start. Usually the first episodes are not that great, and this one was. It wasn't too hard.

I love it visually, it's beautiful. Do I think they're gonna build up some steam, Yes, and I'm excited. I don't think really, anyone's afraid to get messy, so hopefully it'll get pretty good. I wonder how many episodes they have. But keep listening to the twats and we'll give you all our hot takes, or we'll just talk about ourselves the whole time. Bye bye,