Freezing Sperm & Losing Friends (Southern Charm Recap)

To Teas in a Pod. It's Teddy Mellencamp and Camera Judge. Hi, guys, welcome to another episode of to Teas and a Pod with myself.

Teddy Mellencamp and Camra Judge.

Hi.

You know, somebody sent me a message the other day saying, who announces you at the beginning of the show, even though we announce ourselves, which we don't really have to. We've gone over this a million times.

Teddy be Ellen.

Also, it's Ellen k She's the one that announces us.

But we like to do it again.

I mean, I like, I think she's a bigger name than us.

I think we should just.

Leave it at that. So we just start every podcast like, hey, hi.

We can do a little bit better than that.

But okay, hey guys, welcome to another episode of two Teas in a Pod.

We're here to talk some shit and hope to make you laugh or hate us, yes, and possibly get some headlines. Speaking of headlines, it's a pretty big day for us.

It is a big day. Woke up to good news. It's snowing and Big Bear.

Tarama was not gonna tell us about her cough.

No, the cough is gone, I hope, But yeah, while you say it.

We were nominated for an iHeartRadio Podcast Award. Hollywood Reporter announced it today and I just want you guys to know because I didn't realize this at first. I thought, Oh, everybody that's nominated is an iHeartRadio podcast, so like it's not as hard to do. No, No, it's everybody. Oh it's everybod podcaster. So it's fretty.

So guys, we need you to vote for us.

Yeah, vote for us, no shame in our game. Yeah for us, because we don't just like being nominated. We want to win.

Awards show and everything.

Like, yes, it's an awest on March tenth.

Oh, can we go?

And we have to look at our calendars. I'm sure. Yeah, I mean I want to go to Austin.

I want to go.

Yeah, I think I was just in Austin. No, I was in Houston, but I've been to Austin.

You're like Texas.

Well, in a minute, we're gonna be talking about Austin, so well, yes we will.

But that is exciting.

It is very exciting. We're gonna get into Southern Charm. We're recapping two episodes because we were off during the holidays, so We're going to be recapping season ten, episode four and five before we get into this. For those of you guys who thought I was being mean to Shepherd Rose, I have known him since I was like seven years old. That has always been our banter comments.

How come SHEP wouldn't let you talk? How come you didn't say anything? And I'm like, I two old friends talking, I was in visits.

Well, I'm sorry, guys. I tried. I tried my best.

It was like you had mentioned, much like when Ramona was on our podcast. Yeah, she didn't even know your name.

She didn't even know my name.

She I mean, I've been on Watch What Happens Live with Shep. I presented at the Bravo Awards with Austin and Craig like I've they've seen me. I've talked to them and he's like, oh, how long have you been on Bravo. I'm like, oh, like a total of like sixteen seven, you know, And he's like what. I'm like, yes, dude, I'm a bigger deal than you.

Oh my god, are we fine? Now you're now talking about being mean to Shep? Those are I love Shep. We've always given each other a hard time and if you guys thought that I went too hard on him, my apologies. But that's how we've always talked to one another. And who cares. But shep had a good couple episodes, I do got to say, yeah, comparatively speaking, Yeah, yeah. So episode four starts out with everyone's of course asleep, but Sally, she's up at four thirty am.

Sally, I had no idea.

I mean I knew that she, like most of these people on these shows, don't work, let's be honest. So it's kind of like, oh my god, Sally has a job and she makes four hundred thousand dollars a year doing it well.

She takes us through her morning routine before heading to the hospital at six forty five am. Like Sally's out here controlling robots for four hundred thousand dollars a year at six forty five am, while the rest of them can barely control their lives or like get over their hangover.

They're stin like they're in high school.

Like get it, Sally.

Yeah, I mean Sally, So much respect for Sally to I think to have any nine to five job, or you know, a doctor, any kind of job that's not at home, like most jobs.

Are now other than influencing, other other than influencing.

It's very hard to film a reality show when you have a job like that.

Yeah, this girl must be exhausted, but she's coming in and she's dropping some nuggets. She's moving storyline. She's not only does she move that robot, she's moving storyline right along for us. So thanks Sam, I.

Want to see her move the robot.

Also, I want to say, I need a little heads up when somebody's going to do a full hair color change and look like a different human being mid confessionals, Like.

I didn't notice that?

You didn't notice she was a brunette for half of.

The I didn't notice that.

No, what, Like, who is this person? All of a sudden she goes from like being blonde and looking this way, and then all of a sudden, like two minutes later, we get to a new confessional and she's a full blown brunette, and I'm like, well, happen?

Who what?

She looked completely like Danielle from Jersey looked prety similar as a brunette to blonde. I mean I think she looks I mean better brunette Danielle does. But Sally was a completely different human with different color hair.

Yeah, I might be going a little brunette, oh, a little low lights. No, well, no, I'm having my I was supposed to do it yesterday, but my girl canceled on me.

She had emergency.

I was so looking, know, when you're so looking forward to something, I'm like, I've been so down and down. I'm like, oh my god, this is gonna be so fun. I'm gona changed my hair color. And then she canceled on me. But I understand it. But so no, I'm going to do dark, darker extensions. I've been letting my roots grow out, so I have like three inches of my natural color.

Is this going to be one of those things like when we say we're going to have short hair and then we have it for like, I don't know, I've never.

Done this before.

Honestly, I've never done that. I might do it and absolutely hate it.

Well, I'm sure to look good. But then we get over to Taylor's house, Rodrigo comes to pay her a visit. She calls the place her beach bungalow because it's covered in beachy decor.

Oh boy, is it?

Well, Rodrigo hates it, and now who loves it home Goods because I think you could get all of you go over to like the beachy section.

Yeah maybe, I mean I totally get the coastal look. I would have a different vision of it.

It's a little mush.

It was a little much beachy decor and condo. I mean, it's a look, that's for sure. Here's the upside.

She bought it.

It's her house, her condo. She's young, very impressive. But I do agree with Rod.

I would hang myself from one of those ropes as well.

I had to spend too much time in there.

Well, apparently Gaston asked Taylor to move in with him, but she wants to be engaged before she makes that leap.

Blamer, do you blamer?

No, especially after we find out what's coming.

Well, they haven't even been ditting that long, how they uh?

No? And especially Shep called Taylor earlier that day asking to take her out for her birthday and then she's like, well, how does Sianna feel about that? And he's like, well, I didn't really run it by Sianna Like, no, shit, you didn't? Shev you know?

Yeah, Shep Shep is that guy ever gonna grow up?

No? But you know, at least like, I don't think he's like I don't know. Now I'm gonna be biased, but I don't think he's like doing things maliciously. I think it's just this is who.

He's just not growing up?

No, he like, is it Peter Pan? Who is it? He never grows up?

Yeah, that's Peter Pan.

Then Rodrigo says, Sally and Shep were talking shit about Gaston at the dog party. Taylor's upset because no one actually knows Gaston. But that's because he never comes around their friend group. But also, no, who does no Gaston? Sally, I don't get that part.

Sally knows him?

Do you think she should have told Sienna if he wanted to take Taylor out?

Well, I mean, it probably would be a good idea, but at this point, who cares?

She dumped you.

At this point she'd be done and gone.

Yeah.

Then Shep, Austin, and Craig are at a coffee shop together, the three Stooges. We get a flashback to thirty minutes prior, where they're all at the gym together working on their summer bods.

Oh my god, I can't with these guys.

I can't then Shep would like to have children with Sienna. Apparently she talks about it a lot with him. We haven't heard this part of any conversations.

We've never heard her say this. No, we haven't, only Shep.

Meanwhile, Austin's not sure he wants kids.

I'm sure he shouldn't have any kids.

Oh my god. But then Craig and Paige have made the decision to freeze his sperm.

It's okay, wait a.

Minute, Like Craig made the decision.

I was gonna say, wait a minute, because when Craig told Page, Paige was like, what. First of all, why guys connect, He's thirty six years old, He's got to freeze his sperm. Why maybe his kids until they're eighty.

I mean, I don't get it.

I don't know if it was a way to apply not pressure, but like apply his need to want to have kids to pay.

If that's what you.

Have to prove, then you're not in the right relationship. And now he's stuck with a bunch of sperm sickles. I think he should just sell them.

Oh my gosh, have a.

Stoop, sell and sell his sperm.

Stills ask Jenna Alliance to post it on her Instagram.

But wait, do you know why, Guys, I don't understand this. Why would a guy at thirty six year olds do that? Well, I think you're afraid it's gonna worn out, like wear out, or it's gonna yeah.

I mean, whether you're.

A guy or a girl, the longer you wait to.

Oh bullshit, a guy can have. Hugh Hefner had kids until how old.

Who knows he may have had a sperm tested at some point and maybe has a low sperm count. We're just assuming.

Either were information on this because I don't understand it.

But we see the room where Craig had to do the deed. There was inspirational signs like go harder go. The couch was covered in a bed sheet and the blood Craig I wasn't covered in plastic. Oh my gosh. Well, Craig is going to be a father someday, but Paige wants to wait three to four years and he's not arguing with her on that. Okay, Then Shep and Austin they were they were using their big brains a little bit,

It definitely felt like.

She was at a different level than him. She kind of talked down to him a little bit condescending, more like talking to a child.

Well, I mean, I love their banter, but I feel like there was a moment like where she may have turned her back and like sewn up her vagina. After seeing that, he went roses firm, like like nop, nope, nope, nope, nope.

Yeah, I don't know it.

You definitely saw a disconnect. And I think that she's just like I think, and I think I think she does.

But I think he's trying to do better because that's what he thinks.

She expects.

She she probably wants a guy that's very sophisticated, that's very settled and set in his way, you know what I mean, somebody that's established, and I think that Craig is becoming that person. But when you have to make somebody that person, it doesn't always work out.

Well, I don't even know if she's making him be that person. I think she's she wanted him to get a shit together, but I don't think she cares if he wants to like go and hang out with his friends, like she doesn't because she's not.

There half the time, so he can go hang out with his friends. But what I'm saying is is that he feels like I don't know if it's less than or he's not up to her standards, but I feel like he's doing all this and now I'm starting to understand why the other guys are having issues with him. When you turn your back on your bros and for a girl, and then all of a sudden, you know you're a totally different person. They're like, who are you?

What are you doing?

But I mean, he is getting older and people do change, and maybe he doesn't want to go. I mean, I don't want it at the beginning, but now it's kind of like she wants this sophisticated guy and he's just not that guy. I mean, I don't know when I think sophisticated guy, I'm not like, oh, do you have a wrapping table?

And I see her with an older guy. I see her with an older guy that's more settled, more sophisticated, and maybe a surgeon or something like that.

I don't know. I see her. I don't see her living in Charleston, No, no, And I don't see Craig in New York, to be perfectly honest, but I do.

I see Craig in New York.

I think he's one of those guys that will do whatever he can do to make her happy. And that to me, that always like those type of guys I get.

I'm not interested in.

Well, the rumor going around is that she I mean, granted this is supposedly not you know, this is rumored. Who knows, but does that down? Marcello Hernandez he's a comedian and she she's the if that's the same guy from SNL.

But I think that she shot that down. She's like, that is absolutely not true. But you know what happens as soon as you're out and about and there's a picture being taken.

Who knows.

I might be wrong, but yeah, who knows.

According to Instagram, Kate Beckencell was making out with Matt Rife at the Golden Globes after parties that we didn't get invited to.

Yeah, shocker, on that one.

Damn it.

I was you know, this whole scene with Craig.

I was really disappointed because I feel like the producers didn't go all out. They could have snuck that mic back into that room when he was jacking off.

Oh you wanted to hear I wanted to hear it. I wanted to see porn.

I wanted to hear the audio.

Oh my god, we didn't we hear the audio on Potomac. I don't know that. I need to hear the audio again.

There was one in Potomac. I can't remember.

Yeah, remember, Like, I can't remember if it was.

Candice's husband, Yeah, or Wendy.

Somebody was going in and they like showed them. Yeah, it was a lot. Any who. Then they're back at Patricia's house. She and Whitney are discussing his never ending list of responsibilities now.

To the boy that still is at home.

Well, I mean there's so many responsibilities now that his mom transferred the fifteen million dollar home.

Yeah, to avoid that inheritance tax. If you guys not watch.

Yellowstone, Oh I haven't, but.

I think I heard there's a better way of doing that, just putting it in your kid's name. I can't remember what it was. Then Levet and Whitney and his sunglasses. I wanted to say, you don't deserve to have be have this house put in your name. You can't even sit inside without your sunglasses on. Take the damn sunglasses off. He's like Tom Cruise and.

What was that?

I can't I don't like when people wear sunglasses inside those dark dark ray bands panned to us at lunch four days ago. We wore sunglasses inside.

Well that's what our eyes.

Yeah, yeah, make up to eyes. Then Levin j T are lunch together. JT insists he never called miss Patricia a bitch. He knows this all has to be coming from Craig. Love is aware that Craig likes to exaggerate the truth too, and we get a flashback to when he kicked her out of his party. He didn't call her a bitch. Was he being annoyed? But he didn't callarbage.

He should just let this go.

At this point, then Craig Facetime's page to help him decide what to do with the podcasting room in his house. He wants to be able to podcast but also do crafting.

I'd be so in touch with this Martha Stewart side. It's so cute.

I mean, but I can't. But you know what, that could be hard for some women to in Brice.

Well, it's I mean, it's kind of Martha Stewart meets like Joe Rogan vibe.

I don't see any Joe Rogan in him.

With the conspiracy theories and whatnot. Oh but Page thinks it's crazy that he and Austin don't requard their podcast in person, but Craig says it's because Austin is always too hungover.

Well, they said that it's very profitable. If it's profitable, why wouldn't he make an effort?

Well, I mean, are we sitting together right now?

No, but he's saying he can't show up to film.

Yeah, but then Madison and Bratt Are and Hudson are having a family golf day. I just love them.

She could do no wrong in my eyes at all. Madison is just lovely like she has she ever been the villain since a million times been the villain?

Villain? Are you relating?

I just don't see her as in a villain, And even if she was, she's just so pretty and the way she talks with that little southern accent.

I'm like, oh, I just couldn't even get mad.

At she keep wearing your rose colored sunglasses tail. Oh, I just love she is having a good season, and I love Brett and Hudson's the cutest and judiest. Then Brett reveals that he had a spot on his kidney that will need to be biopsied. He didn't tell Madison

Yeah.

Well, then we're at Patricia's eighty third.

But her birthday. She does not looked like she's eighty three years old at all.

Austin, Shep and Madison were invited to her birthday party but her birthday dinner, but Craig was not bum boom, Oh.

Well, I'm with Patricia. Birthdays are for children. I never understood people that like to do, you know, every year for these big, over the top birthday party for themselves. Even I even have friends that celebrate the entire month.

If you don't want to have a birthday dinner, then you don't have one, so I.

Don't I mean, I have a birthday dinner. I guess is not like, but I.

Don't want a birthday while you're sitting at a birthday. But then they all agree that Craig needs to make more of an effort. Even though Patricia says he's trying to be the next Martha Stewart. Shep reminds everyone that Craig is just the figurehead of his business. He doesn't do any of the that's real work.

So he's got partners obviously. So is he just the face of it or is it looks like he's very hands on. Well, he's making it look like he's very hands on.

Yeah, I mean well, shev One says, you know, what's the point of success if you have no friends left to share it with. Do you think that Shep's being nasty about business or just brutally honest?

I don't know.

But there's a new break there's new breaking news by page six about Craig.

What should we listen to it?

Yeah?

That looks like whatever, my new normal looks like I have to start gratitude. I'll get you through this. The time comes clarity, all of the advice I'm trying to listen to. But yeah, right before the holidays, I was very shocked.

It was shocked, And it's okay.

It takes two people to be in a relationship and you can't control our people. You can only control how you react to it.

So I'm going to be kind.

To Page and me and yourselves and all of that good stuff. And I'll I am still processing everything, which is no more than three year relationship.

It's sad.

Then they're just gone.

All day every day.

Now it's gone, be able to talk more on it.

I was going to cry, he's about to cry.

I just wanted to thank everyone for their kind messages. It has been really nice to read them. And it's just life, you know. I have to take my own advice that I that I give when I go around and speak at these home shows that no one's ever better ones are not better off after a breakup.

But ah, he's heartbroke. He's heartbroken.

That's sad. Well, now I feel bad going back and talking about what Shep just said, but just well know what SHEP said. You know about Craig's business, but I also don't know what's wrong with being a figurehead for a business? Like you're paying me high sixty seven figures, Well, it looks like he's figurehead. I'm here.

Well yeah, I to me.

A figurehead is somebody that does nothing with the businessiness has never invested any money.

Is just like hi, on the face of it.

No, that's in folks person.

But well there's also people that act like it's their own company and they don't own a percentage. They're just getting paid money.

To be the face of it. But I don't think that's what.

And when it comes down to when the business sells, that was ain't gonna get shit because that's not how it's But I don't think that's his situation at all. I think that he's probably like fifty fifty owners with somebody else.

Yeah, I mean, we have no idea.

But there's nothing wrong with that at all.

But then Austin stops by Craig's house to talk to him and Craig. Craig's blindsided by Austin's concern. He thought their friendship was fine. Craig says his happiness comes from working and making money, which he doesn't see as an issue, and then Austin.

Reminded me, I think he said making money and and his girlfriend.

Uh yeah, he may have added that in or but I have said that to her.

He said it to Harry I did, or.

Her tits or something like that. Then Austin reminds him that he bailed on golf so he could guard it and post about it on Instagram.

You know.

At this point, Craig's like, that's work. Austin understands that priorities change, but he misses his friend. Craig ends the conversation by telling Austin he can either swim or leave, and Austin decides to leave. I think what we're also seeing here is not just you know the fact that Craig is trying to develop himself into a different man

He's a big boy.

Now I have a feeling I am a little worried about Craig next season though.

That's what I was just going to ask you two things, Do you think that page will be at the reunion? And the second thing is do you think that we're going to see old Craig revert back to his college day self.

I think we'll see a little. I think either Craig will immediately be into a new relationship like it all bam.

I don't think so.

Or he's gonna probably go back to some of his old.

Patterns and maybe they'll get back together.

I don't think so. Sounds like she broke up with him, do you think, Yes, you sound for sure devastated. And I think she's always I think there's always one person that kind of wears the pants in the relationship, and I think it.

Was she for sure wore the pants.

But I think I'm well, we're rooting for you, Craig, we're rooting for you, Craig. Oh my gosh, I was gonna say, I'm sure his dms are flooded.

Oh yeah, Oh, I'm sure.

He is such a nice guy, I would say. I mean, they're all nice guys, there's no doubt about that. But I think out of the three of them, I think for me, Craig's up here.

He's handsome too.

Yeah, he's good looking, he's handsome, he's nice, he's a gentleman.

Yeah, I mean, but we're watching the new Craig. I think the old Craig.

Mary, I have a problem with Shep when he tucks his shirt into his pants and wears the belt.

That's that's like a very southern thing to I know.

That's what I see a lot of them.

Dude.

I'm like, oh no, no, no, just the front.

We're on to episode five now. Shep goes over to Austin's house. Austin recaps his conversation with Craig and says they haven't spoken since then. Shep's known Craig for a long time, so it's a tough realization that they'll never be close again. Shef decides to refer back to Shakespearean plays to prove nothing last forever. Somebody asked us, do you believe that Shep actually reads Shakespeare? SHEF is like an avid reader.

Yeah.

I was gonna say, yeah, I think he does. I really do. And he's smart, yes, he's not.

Like it's not like he went on chat GPT before that conversation and gave it what we would do, which I would have to do if you ask me any about any book. But uh no, he I think chev is an avid reader.

Yeah, I do. Too.

He doesn't seem like a big TV watching type guy. No, he seems like a.

Very smart guy.

That's why I'm surprised he doesn't have some big baller business.

Because I think, you know whatever, didn't.

Two people not watch TV?

I mean, look at us.

I don't watch a lot of TV, only because I have to Craig.

Okay. Then Taylor and her mom, Leslie, are at lunch celebrating her thirtieth birthday. Leslie mentions Taylor's brother who passed less than name.

He was so sad.

I feel so bad for especially for Taylor's mom, because she's trying to be strong and talk about it with her daughter. And you can just tell Taylor's like, no, mom, no, we're not talking about this right now.

It was just so sad.

Yeah. And then she says it's hard to hit this big milestone without her brother. But but Gaston has really helped her with the healing process. I'm I'm starting to worry about Gaston. I am too, And it gets it gets more worries as we have more information. Even in this conversation, the way you know when somebody talks too highly about someone that's never around. Mm hmmmmmm sometimes shit too good to be true.

Well, I don't know, what do you think about Taylor?

Say?

Her mom saying what do you want to do for your birthday? And she says, I want to be left alone?

Yeah?

Is that because of the passing of her brother or is it the is something going on?

Well, I don't know, because I mean she she was going to have a party and then she canceled.

The canceled it, and then Craig and Paige have a party.

And she doesn't show.

That's pretty was she invited?

I don't know why would she not be invited? Her dick cake was.

Well, we never kind of hear about an invitation for her, see, not at all.

We see Craig.

Saying that the party could be celebrating his newly frozen sperm, which she's leaving the page if he dies, Page is like, pretty much, I don't want him. Then Page and Craig talk about Austin. She thinks Austin is going around blaming her for Craig's change behavior. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. The whole keep my sperm after I'm dead conversation just kill.

I know, but just talking about craig sperm and now they're separated.

I can't with this.

It's gonna be hard for the next gal to watch these seasons and then be like, oh yeah, let me have some of that sperm.

You one of those sperm sickles. It's a hot day today, Can you pull out one of those sperm sickles for me to suck on?

Excuse me? I know when sperm.

When somebody has a bucket of flowers, I just want to throw them in the trash.

All that cutting and then she loves cutting stuff on the table. That's what I didn't get. There was all this cutting, and then later, like I felt like six hours later at the party, we see like there's like stems and shit just left on the countertop.

Well, Eddie has a habit of buying me these long stem dozen roses in Valentine's Day and he gets like seven dozen or something crazy and they come in these big long boxes and.

Guess what I have to do?

Cut them, cut.

Them and get vases.

And it doesn't it's like four or five vases and cut and I'm just like, oh my life.

Well, the only thing that really matters is does it have baby's breath or not? No?

Okay, Well, I mean, it's very thoughtful, but I just I'm not a flower girl, are you?

I like like plant like not like our plastics right here, No, but like I like arrangements that like come in, like the pretty pre done things that.

Are already made, that are already made.

That like kind of.

Yeah, I like the succulents. I like things like that.

But when I just get a box of flowers and I got to put them together, no, I'm like, because I'm not good at it, because I just don't care.

Then Madison facetimes her mom and confides in her about Brett's recent health problems. This has been the worst year of Madison's life. Her father is also diagnosed with cancer and passed away from it.

It's it is so said that Madison's dad passed away, right, was it right after her wedding? Because he made it to the wedding And now she's dealing with her new husband having cancer.

Well, going through the ups and downs of thinking that it's gone.

But her mom, her mom, Tara is in her name, she had a really good job of making her feel like, Oh, he's going to be just fine. He's gonna be fine, don't worry. You can't worry with your dad, it was too far gone. Ye with Yeah, with Brett, You're gonna be fine.

Then Rodrigo and Tyler at their home folding laundry. Rodrigo gets a call from Austin because he saw that Taylor's party got canceled, and then Rodrigo tells him that Craig is having a party now instead, which Austin was not invited to. Austin calls Craig a petty little bitch because he couldn't take constructive criticisms. I mean, there are all petty little bitches. Isn't that why the yes?

However, unlike Housewives, is it mostly the guys that argue on Southern Charm? I mean, I'm kind of new to the show. I've only watched a couple of seasons now, but is it usually the.

Guys that are always arguing like little bitches?

Normally it's there's you know, cheating going on, but within the group, so then girls are fighting, guys are fighting. We got to remember last year that was all the Olivia and Taylors of No Am. But this year, I mean, that's why they had to bring in some fresh blood, why we had to get Sally and.

Somebody that their vagina hasn't been touched by one of them.

What's the other chick's name, Oh, Sally and Mollie.

Oh.

I did learn something new on this episode that the fragrance at Abercambie and Fitch is called Firius, which it really should be called Fierrius. The smell when you walk into that store.

I know, it's like pumping. It's like Disneyland. It's like pumping this smell.

Oh, it's like pumping headache and nausea for me, like even just although they have kind of toned it down, I don't know if they're still doing that anymore. They take the shutters off the outside of their windows and our mall so you can actually see in and it doesn't smell like a cheap hohr anymore.

Oh my gosh. Well, I don't know how to break the news to Cruise. But he puts on way too much cologne, and like you walk by him and you're like, whoa, it is little. I'm like, oh gosh, I'm like, maybe we use a little bit less.

Why is he using itny?

You know? He who knows? Last night he was like hair on my net? Mom, do you think we should like Trimmer read there. I was like, oh my gosh, he's a little ready. Yeah. Sure, And then Craig and Page are getting the backyard ready for the party. Molly shows up with a dick shaped cake that was intended for Taylor.

It was pretty cute too, said something like turning thirty doesn't suck at the tip of the penis.

Page is annoyed because she was trying to throw a classy party and Molly and Craig used to sext. I didn't really think Page was annoyed. I think she was just like giving effort.

But how would you fill with someone your man used to sext brought a dick shaped cake to your party. I think it was more of like, oh, that's your girl that used to see I mean nasty text messages too, and now she shows up with the dick shape cake.

I a cake. It was a cookie.

Let's be honest.

It was a cookie cake, and it was meant for Taylor. And she'd already got the you know, she already bought it. I mean, who knows how much that was.

But you don't want to put that thing to waste, to like, you don't want to waste those are beat it up.

I know I can.

The sick Fields.

Cookie cakes are on point, so you know what, I would to try that either. I wonder do we think that Molly and Craig are going to have like a re session? Yeah?

Maybe I think Craig's going to be broken for quite a while.

Yeah, but we'll see the rain. So then it starts pouring rain, and we find out Taylor canceled her birthday party because.

She I have a question, is it normally? Is that like typical weather there, because they're all in like no jackets, nothing, It's like it's cold out, and so it just starts pouring it.

Like hot raining, and then it's like muggy then yeah, and then like the little sums come and one are those they're like bugs? Yeah, they're like little they're called no sums because you cannot see them like you see them.

They're like little.

Nat type things.

They bite you.

Yes, mosquitos, Yeah, kind of like mosquitoes. But uh then uh, we find out Taylor canceled because she was too emotional after her lunch with her mom. Then the rain stops.

Well, then we find out Ania's boyfriend it's going to Broadway.

I well, it was.

Not boyfriend anymore, but now they're over bay by Vanita Manny's done gone, and then Molly admits she only had sex twice in the past two years. Then Sally Sally's been Sally's been busy.

Sally says Taylor.

Tried spreading a rumor that she was a hooker. Meanwhile, we already saw the last episode high.

End hooker ones that screw politicians.

My gosh. But we find out that Taylor and Sally's relationship with Gaston overlapped. Gaston and Sally were even saying I love you to each other. Damn.

Then and I love page. Is that like Alexis and Janny.

Paige and Madison's face during this like they were like and then they find out Also we have to remember Sally's had sex with Shep and Sally Taylor has also had sex with Sally's note.

Sounds like they're sharing all the same STDs.

So Gaston cheated on Sally with Taylor, and Gaston cheated on Sally with Taylor, and Taylor slipped with Sally's new boyfriend.

Yeah, I mean, we don't know the timeline of all of this. But then Madison like can't even help herself. She's like, Gaston's not even you.

Yes, and then there was some comments about his ears, which I never noticed before, and she said he could probably hear you from here.

But then she's like, what do you mean?

Is he here?

Is he here?

She's like, no, he's got big ears.

Then they showed a picture nice editing there.

She is, He's cute, he's a good looking guy.

She's kind of just saying that nothing has really changed, because Gaston called Sally the other day and pretty much said keep my name out of your mouth. Yeah, in other words, like don't talk about me, but don't worry. She took the opportunity to show pictures of them making out.

I know his ears.

She had him right there ready to show too, and she was prepared for this scene.

Yeah, well, I she's probably pissed. Yeah, and then Madison tells Rodrigo everything that Sally told them. Madison's like, I'm not listen. I'm coming here to work and I'm moving this story right along. She tells her to to go, and now he's worried that Taylor could get hurt the same way she did with shapp.

She's a big girl, she'll figure it out.

Gaston telling somebody to keep his name out of her mouth as rich seeing as he couldn't keep himself out of her.

Well, I don't we don't know enough about him yet. I feel like there's a lot of conversations about a guy that we just met.

Yeah, so I need more.

I mean, there was a reason we didn't see John much this season on Orange County.

Well because he didn't want to film, but.

Yes, because he'd done something wrong.

I don't think it's that.

I think it was she was already.

Didn't want people to put their names in his mouth.

Ye.

Maybe, I don't know, but.

I wonder if we're going to see more of him.

I don't know. Then Madison goes into the house with Craig and Paige. Mada asked about a future engagement and Craig says they Craig or Craig says they basically already are, and they all make fun of Austin and the talk he tried to give with Craig, and then Peig jokes that she has to watch her back because Austin wants her spot as Craig's girlfriend. Then Craig says even recorded their podcast alone last night. All their podcast is about.

I don't know.

Do you think that Craig is kicking himself in the ass now that he's single and he's kind of turned his back on his boys.

No, I think they'll all end up forgiving him.

Yeah, I'm hoping that they're rallying around him right now. I would imagine they would be. I mean, Shep and Austin seemed like the guys that wouldn't just kick him when he's down.

I think they'll be thick as thieves, single and going for it next season. But then Shep and Craig are at lunch together. Craig has decided he wants to take a step back from Austin is rethinking their podcast together. While Craig treats it like a job, Austin treats it like a party, Like can't it be somewhere in the middle.

So their podcast is called Pillows and Beer with Craig and Austin.

It's only or it's treated like a party.

Yeah, it's on the network Believe Life and Leisure. Do we think we get they get paid a lot?

I don't know. I hope so I hope for everybody does well. Then Craig gets a text from JT. It says, would love to meet up with you, buddy. Seems to be a lot of miscommunication going on here. Hit me back if you're interested. Craig knows Austin would be really mad if he got coffee with JT. But he doesn't care.

No, because Shep gave Craig Craig some rubber shoes, isn't he sweetie?

Who?

Shep gave Craig some rubber shoes? Like, here you go, I brought you some rubber shoes.

You can just wash them off.

Yeah, I just rinse those off.

So the boys are way different.

Yeah, I know they really. Somebody probably sent those to Shep And then he was like, oh, it was a sponsored post.

Yeah.

But did he say that he wants him to buy him out of the podcast?

It's coming up.

Oh, that's coming up that he wants he wants him to buy him.

I didn't know. Can you can I buy you out of this podcast? Does it work like that?

It's going to be very expensive?

Then going to see if we win this award first.

Then uh, Sally tells Taylor that Gaston was great in bed that's also coming up in next week.

Oo, them are fun words. Hmmm, how good.

Well, when Gaston said keep my name out of your mouth, I don't know that he meant that line like I feel like that line he'd be fine to spread around.

Yeah, I think so too. I think any guy would love for that to be spread around.

But we're loving southern charm, so yeah, it is really good Bye guys, Bye,