Diamonds in the Rough

Hi, guys, welcome to It's kind of exciting, not to say another episode of because we're launching.

A new podcast, a new podcast.

It's still under the two teason a pod umbrella, but we are launching.

Diamonds in the Rough, which I think is I think is wonderful because we met as diamonds and we've both had some we're going through some rough times.

We've gone through some rough times. We've gone through some rough times together, We've gone through some rough times apart.

And it continues.

I think that we have a We're pretty lucky in the way that we have a dynamic where we can discuss things without trying to one up each other.

Agreed.

I think that's very rare in the world that we come from, that we come from. Like I every time I sit down and have a conversation with you, it's like, no, we're.

Just we're just friends chatting.

And we like to laugh, and we like to laugh and we like to dig in, and we like to talk about shit that some of us say important shit.

I say important shit, You say too much? What was it? Stump stump shit or stupid shit? But yeah, I think that you know what, I think that Anybody that's listening is going to enjoy are back and forth and we're going to talk about some topics that are you know, important to us and others.

And so we appreciate you guys listening. Yeah, thanks so much for uh being such an advocate for having Erica continue on after recapping OC because this is giving me a little bit of life right now.

So I appreciate it. I'm happy to be here for you.

But so many of you guys, as you listen to our recaps of Orange County, we're like, hold on, we want more Erica and Teddy. We want more discussions. We want we want to hear your thoughts on a lot of things, a lot of things, not just housewives. No, not just housewives.

And I think housewives, you know, will pay probably a very small part of what we're doing here. It is how we met and it is important foundation. But I think that our friendship, our conversation and life topics are you know, interesting to not only ourselves but others as well.

Yeah, and there's no one that likes to go down a rabbit hole more than me and Erica.

That is true. I mean, God help us. All right, Well, should we get into it.

Let's get into it.

I'm so excited. It's like I know the surfers.

So first we're going to start with a couple of headlines about others, but we're going to talk about like a certain topic. So you're going to see each and every episode will lean into one specific area. And this episode, whether I like it or not, I guess we're leaning into me.

We're going to lead into you, and I'm gonna ask you some questions that may be hard and for you to even just think about, because what you're going through is it's earth shuttering. You know, it's tough. It's really tough, and I'm sorry.

Thank you. This first one before we get into Me, is an US Weekly article. Lala Kent says she and Randall Emmett have productive conversations while co parenting daughter Ocean. Lala Kent has spoken about co parenting daughter Ocean with former fiance Randall Emmett. On an episode of Watch What Happens Live with Andy, Lala said she and Randall have found common ground and caring for the four year old. We have come to a place where it's like we have one thing in common, and that is this child.

I think that's that's a very honest statement, I think. And look, it is about ocean. It is about It's about ocean and how they can come together there and do what's right for ocean. Ultimately, in any time there's a divorce and children are involved, they should be about the kids.

And especially now that she has another baby. And like, it was really cute, so cute, and I didn't guess the name correctly when she told me. It was an ass name, so I'm a little annoyed on myself.

Well, she explained it to me right why she named the baby Sosa, and it was really sweet. I like Laala very much.

I love Laala.

I think she's a really smart young woman. She's scrappy as fulk. Yeah, she's scrappy.

She's been through it too, she's been through it, and she's shown us.

A lot she has, she's get, she gave a lot, she gave a lot, and she has a lot more to give. You're not gonna that's nothing.

I don't think this is the end of No, no, not at all. But she says it's been a fun ride. You know, I'll take you on a roller coaster. One day we're good and the next day he pisses me off. It's all good. We always come back to ocean and her well being, which is where you want to be, Where you want to be. Um, you want to take the next one?

Sure? Okay. So Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck and how they feel about their Thanksgiving reunion. I guess they celebrated Thanksgiving as a family and they felt like really good about it. They are loving each other and having a great time and they Ben says he felt blessed to spend the holiday with his ex and three children because he can just be himself. And I'm sure that's probably true. Yeah, I think that. You know, how was your Thanksgiving?

Not? I mean, I mean it was the first Thanksgiving in fifteen years that it wasn't spent with Adwin.

Yes, and that was tough.

I mean it's challenging only you know, not only because you're used to what you know and there's still so much regardless of what where your relationship goes, you still have so much love for that person.

Yes, and history and memories. You have children, It's not just like whoops, Well, we're doing something different.

Yeah, right, and you also know that it's hard on the other person, of course, so, and it's also hard on your kids. Yeah, and so I think the combination of it. But I mean, I I got home and immediately my family wanted to like talk to me about every single detail. And I night one, We're sitting by the fireplace and they're all asked me a million questions

Of explaining or what's happening.

Yeah, And if you can't do that, then I'll just go back to La Wow. And you know, my dad's as good at giving hugs as I am, so like, oh lord, you know he's like I got you, you know what, Listen, John, at least he tried, you know, I can't sweet. He saw my face, like I was like, I'm not fucking around here like this.

Is you know, I'm at my limit.

I'm at my limit. And you do your best to you know, as you've said, to show up and show out and like do the best that you can for yourself and your family, and but at some point you have to put your boundaries up.

You have to or it becomes See you're in this place where everything is overwhelming and you're like a bunch of raw nerves. And when you're like that, you know, your emotions take over and it's tough, and you're going to feel that way for quite a while. Yeah.

Yeah, So I mean that that part along with everything that's been in the public eye. And we talked about this a little bit before we started recording this episode, because I was kind of, I guess, trying to justify why I haven't gone into more detail about everything, you know, like I was going, I think I was going to say something along the lines of, I'm not paid to talk about myself. I'm paid to talk about other people, and that's why I signed up to do this podcast,

I let you have it because you are a host of a podcast in which you're talking about your life. We're here together. People want to know you are a public person, whether you like it or not, and you were born a public person. You really I mean just you were born into this and so and also too, I don't think now is the time for you to up run and turn tail. Obviously there are limits to questions and you don't have to answer them, and you

And I think especially when small children are involved, even when I am breaking into the headline. We just heard how I spoke about an ocean, Like I'm going to cover a story that's being talked about that she shared on.

It it also relates to you as well.

Yeah, but I'm also not going to give it to her or Randall, no, because it's not necessary.

It's not necessary.

How could you It's really not necessary. I think that there also is that that point and maybe you can help me with this where you want to you want to be perfect or you want to.

But you can't. That is something that is not attainable. And if you can tinuously hold yourself to that standard, you're going to disappoint yourself every day. Yeah, this is going to be a rough ride. And some days you're going to be better than others, and sometimes you're going to have it together, and sometimes you're going to want to cuss everybody out online.

I know, how would you know?

I've never come in God Jesus. I mean, And then there are days that you're going to be fine, and it's just you're allowed to go through all of that, and you're still allowed to work and do your job and comment and host and be yourself and be on red carpets. I mean, you don't have to quit your life just because you're going through something like this.

And I think that something else like that. I know, I do, I know you do. But it's sometimes being in on the joke.

Well, yeah you can laugh.

You have to laugh at yourself. If not, I would be just crying twenty four to seven.

You have to laugh through the pain because it's the only thing you have. Yeah, I mean I remember like making a joke of just like absolutely being so low and having nothing and just being like, well, of course, I mean, you have to laugh at this shit otherwise you will get taken down into a hole. It's just it's not healthy. Well, first of all, none of this is healthy, but that certainly.

Isn't None of this is healthy. But I have realized the more that the little bits that I have shared, the amount of people and I'm sure the same with you that have been like this similar situation.

There's a lot. Listen my DMS. If I were to ever show you the amount of direct messages I got from women that said, not only do I understand, but this is my story. There were a lot more than you would expect, a lot more And.

How do you approach because you're very good at this, especially considering what you've been through, of not even like disrespecting your acts.

It's not in me. It's just not in me. I mean, I'm mad at him, am I upset that he threw me to the wolves and kind of in a way like just sort of like yeah. But I also would be a liar if I said that there were a lot of great times and he did a lot of beautiful things for me. I've been over twenty years with this man, so it wouldn't be fair for me to say, oh, he was terrible, it was all awful, and no, there were some beautiful moments and I learned a lot from

I can say this with one hundred percent certainty, Like I've done a lot of things in my life, but marrying Edwin and having our kids and and doing that together is one of the best things that I've ever done.

Right and it will so and it will forever be And don't lose that. Don't lose that perspective. And it does. And it's your life, your memories. And I don't like it when anyone that's watching or commenting says, well you should have Well, no, this is your life. And the only people that were in that marriage were you in Edwin. And there's gonna be a lot of shit that only she and Edwin asks.

Yeah, And I think that's what's hard with being in the public eye and having press arrived bit right things because something that we see often is a source close to so and so said, and I'm like, well, one, I know that wasn't anybody that I know.

I know right, And number two, I don't know if you've seen things written about yourself that were absolutely impossible where you're like, that is absolutely not true. There is no way under God's green art that I could have ever done X, Y and Z. But that wasn't even in town.

Yeah, or it makes it look like you've leaked it yourself.

Oh who does that?

I mean, because then then it'll be in so many different places that then I think it's just meant to create more turmoil when really I think at the end of the day, both me and Edwin have a lot of love and respect for each other and want what's best for our kids.

And you will continue to do so. But at moments you're not going to. And that's okay too. Yeah, it's okay for you to go through the whole range of emotions and you're also going to have to grieve your marriage. But you haven't even gotten to yet, because that's the real mind.

Fuck, yeah, I haven't gotten to.

No, you're not there yet, but you will be.

Yeah, something that I didn't necessarily do often. But once I was diagnosed with melanoma and all those surgeries, I started going to therapy.

Oh good, this is why you know what? By the way, I know you and I didn't know that. Yeah, does that make sense? I think sometimes people expect us to know absolutely everything about one another. I don't. I know what my friends tell me.

Yeah, and sometimes you don't. It's not that I wouldn't want to have told you that, but or that you didn't ask the question. It's just like, what am I going to be like, Oh, at Thursdays at blah blah blah, I do therapy, like yes, I mean it's and I think when you're going through therapy or when you're going through changes, whether it's how about you have cancer, cancer

I don't think listen to any woman who's gone through it. So I'm ahead of you in this journey, this hormonal journey. That's not an excuse I don't know of. God bless you if you're a woman and you went through all of like perimenopause, menopause, post menopause and you didn't change, because it's a scientific fact that there's great neurological change going on and it's different, and then you you have a lot of different things coming at you in life,

You know what, that's kind of a sexier way to call it. It's like a like retirement, seems like you're about to be making money.

Right, Well, shit, that's the case. Where is it back the truck?

That's the case. Let me get my hysterectomy.

Right, yeah, you're not kidding it.

Yeah, now let's go for it. As somebody who has been through a separation, has gone through things, was there like a particular moment that I said, fuck this shit, I'm leaving.

Yeah, let me think it had been building for so long, for years, and yeah, there was a day. It was during COVID as a matter of fact, during the summertime. I was like, I can no longer live like this. I cannot live like this. I this is chaos. I don't know what's going on. I have been shut out of my own life. I can't get through to him. He's not responding to any way that I attempt to communicate to him or talk to him, and like, imagine

Yeah, I mean I think I'm definitely not at that place. Sure, Like there's a lot of For me, it's I think I have like tunnel vision on the kids.

Well that is the most important thing.

Yeah, and I've kind of shut down my like personal emotions. Sure, you know what I'm saying.

I'm on hold.

Yeah, like I'm to the side of it, like I I don't know, and I think you know, something that a lot of people have been asking is like, what's the situation with with the kids? And I think, what is the situation with the kids? So they know that we are separated or filed for divorce, they do know. Okay, I'm nesting.

Okay, Okay, I'm from the old school where you got your shit and got the fuck out, So I don't know nothing about this. You know, get the bug out. You know. I'm old school. So take take away the nesting. And I'm not being disrespectful, but I don't know what that means.

Okay, So first, first things first, and this isn't this isn't special to me. This is anybody in California. In California, Delaware, Louisiana, Montana, Vermont, and Virginia also have a six month cooling off period. What does that even mean, so some places you can just file for divorce and then.

Thirty days later, I think in Georgia it's no fault and by your day, Yeah.

I've done that.

Yeah.

In California, No, there's a six month cooling off period. So during that six months you can do a multitude of things. The way I learned about nesting was actually one of my good girlfriends. She's a divorce coach.

A divorce coach. Yeah, I bet she makes good money.

Yeah she does.

I mean, but think of that.

But she she told me about nesting and I was like, what is that? And she's like, that's where it's very popular in California because, especially because houses are very expensive, your kids are used to a certain lifestyle. But it's where the kids stay and the parents come and go, so the kids never have like within that six month or however long.

Well, like when we came up and you had to pack your shit and go to the other place. Yeah, so you're packing your things and going somewhere else and then you get to come back. Does it split days or yeah? Or how does it work?

It splits?

Like, I mean, everybody's different, and I can't because of multiple reasons. I can't explain our exact timing, but both Edwin and I leave when the other one comes in. It sleeps. We can both be there like you know, first sporting events or you know. It's not that we can't. We're completely happy to be around one another.

So it's very amicable. Yeah. So you so the kids stay and the parents switch out.

Yeah? So I live at Kyle's.

Do you really? Holy?

I know I saw you filmed in the glamor room.

You know, don't be telling on me?

Fuck you?

Thanks? Is that where you're sleeping in my bedroom?

No?

Are you serious? Oh? Up there?

Yeah, it isn't that great up there? It's so cozy.

I thought you were living in the how the house in the bag?

No? Fuck yeah, it's not a dream.

Yes, I do. Actually hold on a second. We need to have like a night, We need to do a thing. I need to come over and hang out with you all.

It's I mean, and the background's beautiful, so we can start potting from there because the setup is.

Whatever, I mean, you know, and Kyle would love to have us there. I know, she's like because the house is in well wow Wyatt minus the dogs. I love those dogs.

I love the dogs. But there's a ship ton of things.

There's ship ton of dogs, but I enjoy them because I lost my dog. So every time I go over there, I feel like I get my dog Phill.

Yeah. So thankfully Kyle has let me do that.

You can't make up. I just wanted to say, like, for anybody that's listening or watching, like, you cannot make this ship up. You know, all of our lives ours.

Have I mean, but I'm like, this is how you know that there are real friendships to be made on reality. Yeah, because like I was thinking to myself, am I going to like get.

A place to Like I'm I going to get like an apartment over on Ventura you know what I mean? Like an apartment on Ventura Boulevard and like.

Pre decorated to live like two nights a week.

Like it doesn't like, I don't do it work like that? Yeah?

Okay, Yeah, so I just zip on over. It's close easy.

Wow.

I mean she.

Cooks, No, she does cook cook another.

There I mean sometimes.

Wow, how many times have you done it?

No, we're just starting, we're newly into it. But it does work out really well for the kids because then they you know.

We have right around the corner.

We're right around the corner, and you know, everything's on the calendar. They know exactly when I come and go, vice versa. And but yeah, I mean it's it's challenging because for you know, for someone type A like me, like one little thing that throws you all changes.

That is true, Teddy. If she's not good on the old flexibility, No.

I'm not in any ways. Definitely can't do the splits either.

No, but you're not flexible at all, I don't. I mean, you know, my god, Kyle, so of course you are.

I was like, just wait till somebody catches me pulling into Kyle's houses like we Erica and Duke called it years ago.

Listen, I'm telling you the way I'm going. You all should leave me the fuck alone. I see the future. Okay, y'all better leave me the fuck alone. I know what's going on. I see the future except for my own. Okay. But you know, psychic say they can't see themselves. I don't know. I'm kidding to anybody.

No, we'd hate we'd hate some self awareness on diamonds.

In the room now, which, by the way, we know so many people that could come on and hang out with us and better in a rough place. I think everybody in our media orbit like.

We could honestly just throw a dart anywhere and come on and talk. You want to talk shit about whatever you're going for, that's.

Your latest disaster, you know, God help us.

Help us.

Okay. You previously shared on the podcast that you and your ex Thomas, had a better relationship divorced than married. Can you go into that a little bit more?

Well, what I can say is, yeah, I love my first husband, Thomas. Yeah it was Thomas, Thomas and Thomas. I love Tom very much. Tom one. We were young and he's a good guy, and we still talk and still wish each other, you know, happy birthdays and Christmases and stuff like that. Is he remarried, No, I wish he would be there because he deserves someone. He's a good guy. He really is. He's a good man.

Did you ever go back?

No, No, I was young and you know, wild and weird and all of that, and yeah, he's a good guy. But we did not fight in front of our child, like I told you. Yeah, and I was something that's not really nesting. But I remember when my son was young, like he was in grade school and tom One, you know, they live in New York City, was going out of town. So I flew to New York to move into the apartment for like seven to right so that my boy didn't have to miss school or anything, and you know,

The nesting, I think, which was fun.

We had a great time, you know, he you know, it was cool. He was at home and mom came in and had a great time.

I think taking sometimes taking your kids out of their surroundings is really traumendous, especially when there's already additional news, yeah, that they're having to take in.

They has anybody said anything to them?

I mean they they're they're pretty open, Like my kids are pretty conversational. Yeah they're not.

They're smart.

Yeah, they're smart, and they're aware. And I think probably all of us have the same questions, you know that we don't have answers to.

And you might not have those answers fun long time.

And I think that's something that I have to continue to remember.

What is that going on? Yes, they're a fucking radio. What is this?

Is this Kevin Costner?

This is the iHeartRadio Christmas Party.

Well, they didn't bring any snow in here because it's fucking hot as balls.

Or I'm stretched, girl, you're going to menipause and get you some hormones. I mean, we're doing a show I love. This is our first show.

Leave us alone.

We have high level talks in here is very serious stuff.

Sorry, we're we don't know if we're crying or we're having allergic reactions this work.

You're fucking sabotaging our first show. Rude, You're back to Kyle's. We're going to Kyle's. We're going to Kyle's. You know what, We'll be at kyle We'll be at Kyle's next time.

Hold on our next guest. We haven't asked her yet, but we'll be old because she doesn't have a choice.

She doesn't have a choice because she'll be with the snacks and everything else.

So sit down here that we utilized a film.

What do you think about this place? What do you think about you too?

I mean, my gosh, talk about your most recent confessional or when need you think about when you had pigtail braids and Oh.

I knew you were gonna say, girl, okay, little house on the prairie, you know it's giving me. I was like, what's going on?

There was a lot of looks that episode. You and Kathy's hat was also a good treat.

Honeing the hat. I still have my hat, by the way. Well, at any moment she might say, hey, where's all hats, bitch, You're not gonna catch me without my hat. I'm like, the right hair. You're like, hold on, it's right hair. I got my coffee filter hat on, honey.

Don't you worry? He folgers in.

Our cuts, right, soldiers. That's what Tom drank. He really, you did have that old school coffee filters?

Yeah, that was coffee made. Oh god, well okay, my deep, dark, dirty secret.

Cos you do really the coffee made? Yeah?

I used to drag the fridge tours.

Okay.

I would be like, hold on, let me.

Just I've pulled so many things out of that fridge.

You have no idea, No, don't mind the coffee, mate. What is your advice to other women who feel like they've failed or can't move on, or feel guilty about making a decision.

No one is a failure. These things happen in life, and it is okay to get knocked down take a breath, but you can't stay down. You have to pop back up. You have to pop back up. When I was going through all all of my stuff, I remember again people reaching out in DMS and saying, look, this happened to me. Like I've gone, I've been here, and we're all human being okay, nobody's perfect, You'll be okay, but the only way out is through. You just gotta keep going.

And I think for me, a way out is it's not even a way out, but a way through is like I really don't want to place blame.

There's enough to go.

Yeah, yeah, you know, like I don't want to get to that place like I think, Yeah, of course, there's going to be moments where I'm angry, or I'm hurt, or I'm upset or you know, the highs and lowser, I'm going to grieve or for a long time, yeah I'm gonna, you know, fall back in love again. I don't know, but I don't.

Then we need an intervention.

All done, But I don't want to get to the place where you don't want to be bitter is what you're really trying to say.

I think that that's what it really is. You don't want to be bitter. You can go through all of these emotions, but at the end of the day, when it's all said and done in all the dust settles that you're not bitter. Yeah, because that's the killer. When women become bitter, then the whole their whole vision forward is just tainted. Everybody's bad, every situation sucks, there's nothing good that's not true. Yeah.

And I think I saw with you know, my parents' divorce. Uh, there was so much like mud slinging at each other.

Yeah, you don't want to do it that it we got lost in the mix became about them.

Yeah, and it also became about pleasing them.

Oh wow, you know what.

I mean, Like I'm going to make so and so happy if I say this or I do this. Oh wow, and your kids you don't know. And which is why I still say to both of my parents to this day, please don't call me the other person's name.

It is.

It's to me like both of them have done it my entire life, and it's like one of those things like where my dad will be like, oh, little Vicky okay, where my mom would be like all right, John, and I'm like, I know this isn't used as a compliment right now?

How about this? How about being called Okay, I'm not going to say his name because he's my father and I had never met him. You look just like your dad, you know, Da da da da. I'm like, I don't know him, so, yeah, I understand exactly what that feels. So like if you since I didn't know him. Yeah, so I was like, well, I don't know, is it I don't know? Or you look just like your daddy with that Latin nose. I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? What do you mean my latin nose?

Or like your expression, Yeah, the way you.

Look at her hands, da da da da. And you know, my grandmother and my mother would do this to me and they thought it was funny, and it was not.

It's not funny.

I didn't know who the fuck this dude was.

So I mean that adds a whole Well, it's just like, you.

Know, can y'all stop talking about people I don't know?

And and then also there is a level of like, am I supposed to feel shame for being a part of my parents.

Well, at one point they liked each other enough to procreate not once, but twice. Yeah, so what does that mean?

Like, and I'm always whenever they would bitch about each other and be like, you guys chose to marry each other and have kids? Did you?

This was I was I was listening to I don't know, I was watching something on YouTube and it was this therapist who was talking about children who thought that the reason that they got divorced, their parents got divorced was because of them. I'm just here to say, not one day in my life did I ever think that it was my fault. I always thought they were dumb.

Okay, I never thought it was my right.

I never knew and I'm talking about my stepfather now. I mean I knew that they were they were idiots. No, nothing to do with me. Y'all were really stupid.

No, I mean one of my very closest friends was like, my parents stayed together until I graduated high school for us, and it was we weren't stupid, right, We saw how unhappy kind an happy and and I'm not saying that I wasn't happy or that I am unhappy. I'm not putting any emphasis on that. But I am saying kids are very smart.

They're very smart. They know what's going.

On, and as long as you show your kids love, we have to give ourselves some grace.

You deserve grace. Edwin deserves grace. Everybody in this situation deserves grace. You know it's.

Man, it's a shit show. No it's not.

You're a human being. You're having a really human experience. No one can, you know, leave her alone. Well, I know they're not going to. But I know they're not going to, but you also have to almost look at yourself like step out, like detached, like take two steps back from your personal self, and so you can get so destroyed by it.

I do, and tell me if I'm wrong. Do I seem a little less anxious than my normal self.

I didn't want to say anything, but yeah, it was a time. I'm not gonna like reveal too much here, but there was a day when I was talking to you that it was really bad. Yeah, and I was like, wow, that since passed, and you seem to like you've taken a breath.

Yeah. I think for me having some sort of a plan, sure, whether that plan comes to fruition or not.

It's the idea. It's you have a plan and you can make adjustments. You're gonna have to be flexible. But no, but you look, this is a great also a great moment to see just how flexible you can be.

Yeah, and I also I'm really grateful to be able to do this with you and to be able to have to choose on a pod with camera because, like it, showing up to work.

Is really important for your mental health.

And people give me a lot of shit about accountability. How could you be an accountability to coach? I'm like, I'm an accountability coach to help you like work out and change your like so what Like, it doesn't mean I'm an accountability coach all aspects of what.

But showing up to work every day is accountable.

It holds me accountable to.

You made a commitment to the being on the show. Everybody is everybody like taking the moral high ground and fuck you you've got you've got problems too. Yeah you know, don't don't let those people tear you apart. No one is perfect.

So who do we dig apart next week? Kyle?

Well, yeah, I don't know if I'm a lot, but I don't know.

So how did it work for you with your son and the holidays?

So somebody got so one of us it was alternating. I always got every summer, so from so let's just go Thanksgiving. If he had Thanksgiving, I had Christmas. Then I had winter break or spring. So there's winter break and spring where I didn't have that when I was going to school, Like, I don't think these kids go to school.

No, I'm these private schools and you pay all that money.

And then every chance, aken, we're having a holiday, we're.

Having a holiday. Oh you know it's parent teacher conferences for four days. You know what do those during the holiday?

How about this? How about it's not it's fifty grand to send these kids every year.

Yeah, I've learned a lot about finance just recently.

Did that blow your mind apart? I'm so happy that I have one child who is thirty two years old and I don't have to do this. Well for me to do it before in New York City and it was pricey, well.

Not only is it pricey, but then it's like in La It's it's such a scene like where my kids go to school, Like there's bodyguards for particular kids because of celebrity and then you're like.

Well, my son went to college with someone who is the president of a European nations child and that was like they they had full on like live in yeah security.

But then you also kind of was a military college. I mean, but to kind of like talk about the kids situation in general, like what is just And we're not even talking about divorce, We're not talking about my kids. We're just talking about kids in general, like what is the best way for kids to grow up? Like in LA it's very different because you have to be kind of a helicopter parent, like I could walk to school.

Yeah, but you, I'll go first off, and you lived in a really great place coming up. I mean, Hilton Head is stunning and it was a different time that doesn't exist much now. Yeah, I mean certainly not where we're living in the city.

Yeah. No, I mean there's I want somebody was like, would you let Slate walk to Starbucks by herself?

No?

I was like, absolutely, not, even with her air tag on, She's not hell no, I mean I've never even left her by herself.

No.

And I looked at like, just because you know, I'm curious, I'm like, what age do kids babysit? And I guess at twelve the kids are allowed to babysit. I'm like the thought of leaving slate to babysit the other kids.

But wait a second, we were doing that. That's I I.

Had already had my babysitting license.

What is that?

There was like something that you did on that like it was part of the babysit.

Now, when I was coming up, it was just like my mom wanted a club with her girlfriends, So Erica, can you watch her daughter? We fucking I tore that house apart, and the kids loved it so much they asked me to come back every week because I was just wild. You were ordering pizzas.

And don't turn the babysitter instead.

Turning up the music, and just like.

Having friends age doing all the things.

Well, no, I was too little, That's what I'm saying.

Like, how old were you when you started babysit?

Probably twelve and they were like six. I had no business doing any of this shit, but I the young mom, had friend they wanted to go out. We used to stay home and just eat candy and get wild, sugared up, and just the main thing was don't under any circumstances go to the door. Oh yeah, and if anything looks crazy, call your grandmother. Not even I'm not answering how could she answered? There were no such thing as cell phones in this bitch was at the club, like what you

No, I mean I I wouldn't even think of it.

Like I imagine slate like going on you know, uber eats, getting pizzas, just corraling the other kids and you're out. I mean, in no way.

In Los Angeles, hall no, like where my sister lives in South Carolina. I would probably let her like walk to the ice cream store like it's two minutes from the house.

On FaceTime. I'm no, I'm a weirdo.

No, I'm I'm I'm wild about it too. But it's also it's that as your kids start to grow up.

You have to let go.

She's still twelve, I mean, I mean Bella just got her license.

Oh he didn't know. Did you let her drive her around? Oh? Yes, what?

Oh I don't like to drive, so I'm thrilled.

Wait, Bella is driving you round?

Yeah, bell is the driver. Now, don't you worry. But not on Friday for jingle Ball because we're using Ubertine.

Are you really?

Oh yeah, we're using Ubertine. It's really cool because you can actually track the location of exactly where the kids are in that moment.

I want if they have special drivers that only want to do the tea.

Yes, they that's what I was thinking.

Well, shit, you know what, I could have.

Put you in an Ubertine sometimes me, so then I could fully track your whereabouts.

I am about sixteen and so I've never matured past sixteen. So you know what I do.

I have this.

I want you to send me an Ubertine and I want my nuggets and fries in the back that day because.

And I wanted a doctor pepper. Thank you right? Oh my gosh, you know who we need to have on diamonds in the rough? Who Rena?

Oh that would be fun, that would be nice.

I hold on, Renna, actually have a bone to pick with Oh hell no, it's about the sauce. You said that you were sending me Harry's sauce.

What a minute, what are you talking about? You didn't get it?

No, she I got the message.

My son loves this sauce. When you're talking about a half Sicilian child.

I'm furious because I got the text message confirming this is confirming this is still your address.

Oh my god, how did I've never got hairs? We can get you somewhere at Kyle's.

We can overteat it.

I'll swing by Renas, grab some sauce and head on over to Kyle. You know what we should do. Renna should come over and we should make pasta one night to the four of us. Yes, and just trash everybody and listen.

We could relive when we Oh, I did appreciate you had some peak hair extensions the other day.

Which way were they falling out?

No? They looked good? Oh good, thank you?

Oh the pink? Oh yes, I liked it.

It was hot.

I thought you were like peak. I was like, were they falling out of my crowd? O?

Pink? That it was nice.

We wanted to do something that just had some collars looked pretty.

Thank you. Can we talk a little bit about if your dating life has changed at all since.

Well, no, it hasn't. And I'm feeling like tumble weeds and I just I need to be out here dating. I am so social, I'm going out.

I am Where are you going?

I mean, I have a dinner, fancy dinner on Friday night with some really fancy friends that I'm not going to say who do I know them? Not personally, but you know them, you recognize them? Sure?

Is one of them a date for you?

No? This is a full on chat chat chat, but it's good.

And when you when you are going to date next, are you going to go older or younger?

No? I don't think I've already done the older thing, so I think it's my help now. But you're like, no, you know what, my oh my god, my therapist. She goes Erica, you can no longer be a nurse or a purse for a man. I was like, hey, okay, so I take that to say my age are younger.

I like it.

But if Warren Buffett called it.

She's like, she's like, but Elon Musk or Jeff Bezos.

Well yeah, I mean, hold.

On, know what we could maybe get into in one of the Diamonds of the refs. What have you watched the Girl's Gone Wild?

I'm about to I feel bad for them.

I have so many questions. Do you want to hear something? All's crazy about our phones? Now?

What? Oh you mean the transcribe?

No, there's a little button on the side at the beginning when you start talking to somebody and it says you can record the phone call.

Oh, yes, of course, and then it alerts them we're recording.

What But I thought, so, is it like zoom now because it's saying that it's recorded, they're allowed to record.

Well, I don't think that we've had privacy since the nineteen fifties or so exeasing me whenever everybody's like my bribecy, I'm like, you haven't had any for fifty seventy five years, So don't worry about it. You do it, you have it. And but yes, I just always assume that everything that I do, which is kind of great for us because

Did you know though on riah, no, because they didn't let me on. But did you know, though, if you motherfucker, if you're caught screen shotting somebody's photo, you get kicked out. I know you haven't gotten in yet.

I like that, actually like that because you shouldn't. It shouldn't.

But I could easily take my phone and take a picture of your phone.

Well duh, don't be a rookie and do a screenshot.

Yeah, like don't. This isn't fucking snapchat.

So many ways we can do this. By the way, I worried that people that use Snapchat actually think that that stuff goes away. No, it doesn't.

It doesn't go away.

Nothing goes away.

Guys, we could go deep. Actually, I'm very good friends with one of the heads of Snapchat.

Nothing goes away yell, and I kind of.

Think we should bring her into this conversation because the world of snapchat.

Is it is. What is the demo on snapchat these days?

I think the demo? I mean, I know that most kids won't even text anymore. They solely snapchat, really yes, And the reason for that is but they're not even sending like pictures of themselves. It's like half of an eye or like, it's what is going on? I don't get it. It's starting to be like such a lack of communication, and then you're left on red and then you're left feeling like you're not good enough because so and so is not responding to them.

I'm so happy I am fifty three. But well, I'm gonna tell you I was on a three kids. I mean, obviously they're not on Snapchat, but you have three kids that you're raising in this digital age where you know they don't know anything but having a phone in their hand.

Yeah, I know, and it's frightening. So I you know, I have Custodia. This is not an app.

What is that?

Custodia is an app where it tracks how long your kids are on particular site.

My phone would be on fire, yeah you this would be.

But I don't know how you are. But I'm a person that's like I need.

That, like I r L in real life.

Yeah, Like I can't pick somebody by a photograph. No, I aesthetically be like George Clooney or Brad Pitt, which I need to know what your answer is neither, No, I mean you had to pick.

That's not I'm with them.

Well, that's both.

She want to get out the way. I'm not in the sand. Okay, watch do't now you know who has a small who knows who's living in smaller quarters than me? You I'm a cheers to that. Well, I thought I was the brokest.

One and down and yeah, tell you well, I'm moving up.

I was thinking about that, and you know you live in a smaller place you live in Oh my god, who am I?

I don't even have Tom's left over furniture? What the no?

You don't even have toms left over furniture. It's back at the nest. Too bad O. Ca'sh the furniture I never sat on in fifteen years. I decided that was what I needed to take. Don't take the other stuff, leave it for the nice people. I'm dead.

Well, anyways, can I sleep over tonight?

Yeah?

You can't? You you have a guest room for me? On certainty?

Great?

I do well.

I feel like we've covered a lot of our roughness.

Yeah, we're rough around the edges. Is there anything that you want to say or that you need to get off of your chest in our first episode? And I'll tell you why. While we're going to come back to your story. I want you to have fun when you're with me.

The only thing that I'm going to say closing out is that I'm just excited that we can sit here and we can talk about anything and we've got to make it.

Thank you and thanks. I'm happy that we get to do this together.

Hopefully next time we get to do it together in a less hot room and write metopol I'm I probably have butt sweat at this point.

Do you use it? Loomy?

What's Loomy?

It's the all body deodorant.

No, oh god, now I hate myself.

Loomy she is was created by a woman gynecologist, and I'm going to give you some Loomy, give us some product.

Anyways, Loomy. Now I feel like I have issues.

You don't have issues. You're fine, all right.

Thanks guys for tuning in. We'll be back next week to talk about Kyle's attic, Flowers and.

The Attic written by Teddy Mellencamp.

And Erica's glamorom that's not actually.

Her glamor Stop telling on me. God damn, I'm always seriously guys, thanks for tuning in, and I'm glad that we can do this