Diamonds in the Rough: Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby!

Hi, guys, Welcome to another episode of Diamonds in the Rough with myself, Teddy Mellencamp and.

Hi, I'm Erica Jane.

Well, if this doesn't perfectly sum up who we are at this moment, Erica is on Broadway and filming the pod from New York and I am in a camper in Palm Desert, So.

Well, what are you doing there in the camper and Palm Desert.

I am here at the camper because we are back at our first horse show of the year, and so yeah, and we're trying to you know, cut some coths do the things. Like it was. It was fine camper life. Night one was all right, except for the fact that Slay wanted to be in the primary room and I just loved on the buck. I was like, I am having flashbacks of my childhood. My dad's tour bus. That's a really junkie one.

Not in the John Mellencamp tour bus.

Right.

You know what, Uh, the horse world is is expensive. You know, it's an expensive and extensive world to live in and you know, be successful, and it's not for the faint of heart. How are you.

I am? I'm good. You know, it's the crazy thing about you know, getting divorced and you know, I mean not that you're divorced, but this the ending of uh, you know, a relationship is just like the different stages of how you feel throughout time. Sure, and you know there's some days that are great and some days are

Well yeah, and I don't like that either, going with the flow. But I've surrendered to that moment of just sort of you know, I don't know what's coming next, and I can't predict it, and I'm out here on my own two feet, which is great. Like I'm not bitching but there are moments where I'm like, oh shit, you know what is going on? What do you do on your days if you're not with the kids.

So I mean I pod every day, so like I'm always working. And then now I'm it's it sounds crazy, but like I've gone on a couple of dates.

Yes, fucker, I don't even go on dates.

Well, you want to hear the crazy thing.

I'm not trying to get these dates. Wait, how are you getting these dates?

Well, so this is pretty crazy. So I signed up for Hinge and I was like, this is a freaking joke, Like why are only twenty eight year olds reaching out to me? Like why? And then I realized it's because I had my age down too low. But I was like, clearly, I don't need to be dating a twenty eight year old. I mean, I'm they're hot, but like I don't. I don't need it. And plus I can't really figure out Hinge because I'm too old. I don't know what a

Me nineteen ninety nine.

Yes, I was nineteen when I first came out to LA, but I recognized his face. But I sae and he's like and then he's like, yes, Teddy, I you know, I was just waiting to see if you.

Remember so you guys went out, yeah, And well.

I mean, I don't know. It's more about like the conversations leading to going out all those But.

I'm not saying that, like you know what I'm just saying like is it nice to be out and like having a conversation, you know, like being I don't know, friendly or something.

Yeah, well he particularly I have not gone out with yet because talking and having conversation and it's that weird like who knows. But it's been so long that I'm like, I don't even know, like do people flirt or like play games? Like what what happens around you?

You are looking at the wrong person to I don't know anything.

But before we get into your dating sage, how's Broadway?

There is no dating sage. Broadways fabulous. I got a standing elevation in my opening night. I standing elevation my second night. It's great. I'm having fun. You know, there's such a community here at Chicago, the musical Everybody there's just really special and nice. And I needed something relaxing like Broadway, you know, to come and do I love it?

Are any of the same people that were on the show still Yes, So that's gotten more comforting.

It is because you get to share the stage with them, they and they you know, I did it eighty times. But that was five years ago. So we were hurting, Oh my god, that was five years ago. Yes, you were pregnant, getting older?

We how has that been five years? In my mind, I was like, that was two years ago.

By the way. But by the way, these five years for you and me have been horrible. Not like think about just think think about, just think about from December twenty twenty till January twenty twenty five, I mean or January. I was with January twe I mean, it has been a rough five years for both of us. Look at how much our lives have changed, I mean just personal things. So yeah, but Broadway's great. I'm having a great time.

And you're there three more weeks, Yeah, February eleven, three more February eleventh. Well, I'm so excited for you. That is awesome. We took some listeners feedback, and something that a lot of the listeners wanted to hear us talk about is sex. Something that's so interesting. I mean, Erica knows. Like when I first met Erica, I wouldn't even say the word orgasm. I would say, oh.

She was very you were very very conservative.

Like beyond.

So I little like, come on, you were a little stiff.

Yeah, I was very very stiff. So the fact that we're doing this podcast, I'm talking about sex is definitely out of my comfort zone, especially because we're doing it at ten am. I couldn't even have a glass of Champce to like loosen myself up. I was like, oh shit, this is going to be.

A dude, this is going to be hey, but you know what, sex is an important part of your life, our lives as women, and you know, life goes on and I need to be having more.

When was the last time you had sex?

Maybe a few weeks ago, maybe a month ago. But I don't really.

Hold on if you haven't mentioned anything to me about such things.

Because it's not that important. Oh if it was something that was important, i'd be like, hey, get into this, but it's nothing to report, so I could say, like a month ago, yeah, but I have not been focused. But wait, I want to give myself a little bit of moment here. I've not been focused because I on that, because I've been focused on getting this show together, and

Yeah, I mean I'm on Hinge.

That's what Laya was on and she Ray won't let me on.

Yeah, they didn't let me on either.

I think it's a housewives.

Think I'm on Hinge, And I mean it's the other night we were I went to dinner with Kyle and we spent you know, forty five minutes going through the people that have hearted or a rosed me and we just freaking laughed and like pressed X like no, no, no. I mean it's it's a lot of no's. It's like being an actor. You're going to get a lot of no's. You're gonna have to say a lot of no's before we get that. Yes, but I.

Think that's a cool thing. I mean, what did you do? Did you take? What pictures? Did you I don't even know. Maybe I should download.

This thing, so yeah, I think you should do it. I mean my profile, let me let me read it. I mean I didn't take it very seriously on my profile because I was like, I'm not I'm not taking this app very seriously.

Hinge Dating app Match to install Hinge. If you're listening, send us something.

Yeah, whatever, what do they make us? Yeah, like make us. Some people are verified Hinge users. I'm not. I don't know how to become one. I don't know what that means, but it is me.

What is my phone number? I'm doing it right now, go ahead, good.

But what I have learned is that quickly once you're on Hinge, they want to transition right out of Hinge. Like they're like, hey, because you can with Hinge, you respond, then they respond like there's no like double messaging if you forgot to say something or you did a typo. So the couple of people I have spoken to on hinge immediately or like can I get your phone number? Or can we talk on Instagram? Because this isn't pain

Okay, I know, Okay, so.

My primary photos changed a couple of times, but either way, it's it's been a nice distraction.

What kind of men are are are messaging you?

Like?

Are they professionals or are they I don't know? Like what are you getting? Like you say, like your age range or something or yeah.

You put your age range. You can see like what they do, so like they're I mean, I don't really care. As long as somebody is like passionate about what they're doing and like has a regular job and whatever, then I don't really care. I would have to go in a couple of days to decide that. But uh, I mean I don't want to date an actor. I don't want to like, uh, but somebody in entertain I don't mind. Also, like location, like there's some people that are just locationally undesirable to me.

Well, this friend of mine said on Riah that he matched with some guy in Istanbul. I was like, we live in La, Like what the cook is that? Like? Why is that? That's not a match at all? What are we going to know? I like five continents to go on a date.

No, I did my mileage range within thirty miles, which I still think is too far, because you know that even thirty miles in LA means we're probably going to like Manhattan Beach, and I ain't going there.

No, I'm not.

Manhattan Beach is lovely, but I'm not doing it. But yeah, so it's interesting and you know, who knows what will come of it. And but I think on those nights that I am alone, it's nice to talk to people that I think it's nice.

To flirt, right, and it's nice that it's nice to flirt and get a conversation going or whatever.

Yeah, And I mean I haven't gone on very many dates, but I've gone on, you know, one from Hinge, one not from Hinge. And I mean it's weird. You know, you don't really I don't even know the freaking rules anymore.

Do you feel awkward? Because I would feel really like a I don't know.

I feel one, there's like that moment of anxiety like that I said to both the guys that I've gone out with. Listen, I know this is like because I don't want to make it like bragging, but I'm like, just as a heads up, if you're eating dinner with me, there is a chance that paparazzi is going to take.

A picture right now and they kind of know that you who you were before maybe like this, I mean, do you say that you do like.

When I say that I'm a podcast host and TV personality.

And that's pretty much gonna yeah.

Yeah. So but before I've gone out with the two people, I just said, as a heads up, I'm not my reputation isn't the best right now, and pop parazzi are pretty on me. So if you're not comfortable with a shot that you that may or may not be taken. Not that I'm doing anything physical with these people, but

Like that off, I haven't seen those. I've been in a bubble over here. I need to like take a look around. Hi.

I'm Kristin Davis, and I want to know, are you a Charlotte. In nineteen ninety seven, my life was forever changed when I took on the role of Charlotte Yorke on a new HBO show called Sex and the City. As we watched Carrie, Samantha, Miranda, and Charlotte navigate relationships in New York City, the show helped push once unacceptable conversation topics out of the shadows and altered the narrative

Okay, so, Erica, if now that we're getting you signed up for Hene or Lias getting you signed up for hend right now, what photos are you going to put on that? Well, then what's going to be your age range?

Well, for the age range, I can understand. That's easy. It's my age and younger. It's not. You know, I don't want to date anybody.

But how young would you go?

Maybe thirty? I mean, because I'm not looking for anything that's serious. I want to just have fun and meet different people. I've been married all of my adult life. I'm really okay not doing something like that, but having a good time meeting interesting people or having good conversations or doing fun things. Sure, thirty maybe too young to like, you know, know, anything, but probably really good. So that's how I kind of look at it. Yeah, yeah, you know,

So is it lasting a long time or knowing what they need to do in that time frame?

Well, I can teach, but I don't want to. But sometimes there's some savvy thirty year olds. Yeah, m you know, sometimes there are some savvy thirty year olds. I don't know that I could do the twenties thing.

Yeah, I mean I don't love that I could be reaching out to me or like the twenty eight range.

Yeah, i'd do that. I'd be like, I don't think you'd want I mean, I know what you're after. That's cool, but I don't know if I'm after that too.

But also I'm like, I have a jillion children and I'm available on Tuesdays.

Like, well, maybe I don't know that i'm but they don't. They don't. Yeah, but that's you know, aren't they're not available either?

Yeah? So who knows?

Do you? How do you? Yeah? I think what my thing is is that what is my name? Oh, it's already asking me my name? No background checks are conducted, which was going to be my next question.

Yeah, Now what.

Name should I use? My last name? Should I use my name? What? What? What name did you use?

I used Teddy Mellencown. I just went with my name, and but I could easily. It's effortless to tell if somebody is like a starfucker, like they're trying. Like one guy's like, so, I'm like, I know, you could just google me. You saw that it says TV personality and podcast hosts like, but he's like, so what television shows?

R I k A.

I think you could do Erica Jane. I guess right, yeah, I mean it feels right Erica Girardi doesn't. I mean, then you get into a different level of googling.

It's all bad either way, it's all bad. You think you're bad. Your way to sign it, and I'm gonna continue this way.

Yeah right, you're gonna I'm gonna hold you accountable to this now you're not, yes, I am no. Do you realize the joy and happiness that Kyle felt the other day when we were out going through my hinge and then one of the guys messaged and was like, hey, can we talk And I was like, I'm with a bunch of friends, but you're welcome to FaceTime us. And he did and we were all like crying, laughing, and he looked like the age of like I could have birthed him myself.

I was like, so, what do you like?

I was like, what what's up? And He's like, snow to la and you looked hot and I want to have some fun and like Kyle and I are like tears are coming out of our eyes. And then he's like, you know, just saying stuff like you know. In order to talk to you, I had to get out of bed and I put some clothes on and I was like, oh, oh god.

I can't see Teddy. I'm just too jaded. I'd be like, you know what, I can't, please don't do this. I guess when put.

On a tank top, I was like, this isn't going to be a Now after this informational face time with Kyle, and Jen and Christine.

But well, when when Liah was on Hinge years ago, she would let me answer for her right, so I would be Liah. I got us kipped off because I may or may not have said that were appropriate. I don't know. I don't think. Yes, I don't know if my my online career is going to be that great.

Well, no, we're going to make it great. Maybe we can find Hinge friends. We're going to bring on a sex therapist and talk to her a little bit, and then we're going to get in and talk about like the real shit that this is more about, like hormones, how it changes as we you know, are you know, we don't like to say getting older, but as our bodies change, those types of.

Things, desires change.

Yeah, yeah, okay, So we're going to bring on her. Name's doctor Viviana Coles. She's dedicated her career to helping couples and individuals navigate emotional and physical intimacy. Pillow talk. No, I'm so good at pillow talk.

I'm the nastiest pillow talker, the nastiest.

Technic, so nasty I can do. Pillow talk to me is like dainty and like like like I'm not like I'm fine to be the little spoon and like be held tight and like really feel it. But like I'm not like a light caressing type of person.

I can do it, are you? I can do it all?

A fucking course you can. You know what, just because you're gonna be on hinge now and you want to take all my dates, it's a little bit.

I don't think we're going to be in the same pool.

I think we are.

No, I don't think he liked the same thing.

Yeah, I don't either, But let's bring her on real quick, pretty high. Hi guy, so he Hi, good to see you too. So I mean we have like some thoughts starting questions, but honestly, if there's anything just like sex related things changing related, how people that don't necessarily know what they like, what's missing those types of things I think would be interesting. But yeah, we're here with doctor Do I call you doctor viv I feel like the last time we did the pot me.

Doctor viv doctor Viviana, doctor v whatever you want whatever role.

Okay, all right, so doctor v that tracks for what this podcast is about, which is sex. What is like your biggest recommendation for somebody who doesn't necessarily know what they're missing and their sexual relationship.

Ultimately, whether you're solo or in a relationship where you can have partnered experiences. I want everyone's sex drive to really enhance their life. And for so many of us women, especially as we're getting a little bit older into our forties and fifties, we start to feel like, oh my gosh, I have this freedom with my body, this vulnerability that I've never experienced before. But sometimes our sex drives plummet. So I would love to encourage everyone to really tap

So, my vivid fantasy, what is this? Yeah, it's okay, this is new teddy. You don't know anything about this yet.

So my Vivid Fantasy is something that I have created. It is a choose your own sexy adventure.

For adults, obviously, and you.

Can fill it out on your own or with a partner. But preferably on your own, because we want this to be all about what you want, what you find sexy, where you want to be to all of that, and it takes you through what used to be an in office exercise.

For me, with my clients, I would take them like, detail by detail. What do you smell, what do you hear? What do you see?

All of that Now I've digitized it, so any moment of the day or an evening, you can go on create your own fantasy and it spits out an erotic story that's all your own. And the process of doing this has absolutely opened women's minds in general, but men too.

I have a lot of partners that are doing this in mind.

I just don't want to ask you this. What do you find is the biggest thing holding women back from doing something like this, from having like a fantasy.

K A lot of women are stuck in this idea of where where am I supposed to find the time or the energy?

And when is it okay to have sexy thoughts?

Is it only during sex For a lot of women, yes, that's when they think they should That's the only time they should be thinking about sex is in the sex act.

You need to be stroking.

That organ all day long in order to feel ready to actually be physical, either with yourself or with someone else.

Think about the fact that women often take twenty.

Minutes longer than men to reach the same level of pleasure or even orgasm. If you're waiting until you're in the moment, imagine how far behind.

You might feel.

So and I think that one of the reasons that men do this pretty well and I think they're ahead of us, is that they allow sexy thoughts to come in and they don't immediately go oh my gosh, no, oh my gosh, no, get away, no, no, this is not the time, wait what like, you know, and for a lot of women, I think we just really struggle with that. So this kind of gives you the the arena. But even if you're even if you have five.

Minutes and you're waiting for your uber or just take.

The time to do this because you can always respond, you know, you can always go back and actually read it. But allow those sexy thoughts and ladies, it does wonders for your sex drive, and it'll get you a little bit more revved long beyond, you know, long before you go into anything sexy with someone else. The other thing that I would tell you is, if you're in a relationship,

Teddy says she doesn't like pillow talk, but I do, and I think that it's a real skill. And I think Teddy, like, the more you do it, the more you're like, you don't think I.

Know what it until you just kind of explained it. I didn't really know what pillow talk was. Like, it's not like.

You're right, pillow talk is what used to happen when you were like maybe postcoital.

And yeah, I don't like that.

Like it's like, you know, let's talk and share sweet nothings and talk about what just happened. People don't do that and and I'm not saying you shouldn't, but thank you.

Okay, let's hear it. What do you talk about, Erica?

What are you about?

Listen? I will talk to you about what I felt felt good? What how I like the way you touched me, or you know, part of your body feels really good to me, or this was amazing that. Oh yeah, like I'm really into all of that. I'll give you the full rundown.

Okay. And what happens when it's not so great? Do you also do that? Or is that another time.

You're just not that when it's not that great, I won't even get to that. Does that make sense? Like I only do that with people number one? I feel really comfortable with number two that I've had a nice time with. Like that is something that to me is almost it's going to sound crazy, almost more intimate than the actual sec that's sex act itself, because if I'm being vulnerable with you and telling you the things that I liked and what I want to see more of,

Yeah, so a lot of people are not giving each other that feedback. I'm so happy for you that you do and I think it's it's a great thing. I often recommend that people give feedback.

Outside of the sexual experience.

That way, it doesn't feel like so raw and you're not so sensitive whether it's good or bad.

But yes, absolutely do your thing.

But my pillow talk, and actually I'm writing a book about it right now, is really trying to help people to have have the ability to say, you know, I want you because I show you.

And it's not just during sex.

Yeah, no, I really like someone, Like I have a long, like daily communication, like long sort of sensual lead up to like seeing them, like I'm that's who I am.

I'm like the seduction. The seduction is all I'll.

Do it just four hours a day, Like that's how my brain works, and that's what I do. Like, I'm on it. If I'm in if I like someone and I'm really in that space, nothing stops me from that.

Okay.

I love that.

And I'm so new to it, which sounds crazy because I've been married for agion years, but I'm so new to being single and kind of exploring this other side of me because you know, I think, and this isn't too shade my ex or anything like that, but it really when you have a bunch of little kids and you're you know, you're going through the motions. It almost feels like you know your business partners. You're like, all right, we're gonna go in, we're gonna do this, we're gonna

I actually have a quiz that'll help you to figure out how to do this better, how to have more pillow talk in both a physical ineverbal way, and it's pillowtop quiz dot Com and Teddy. I definitely want you to take it because I think you'll find that you'll be able to recognize like, oh, going forward, I really should be more mindful of this or know how this

But most people don't want to schedule because they feel like, oh, it's too much of checking off the box. If you have pillow talk, if.

You have more pillow talk in your relationship, it doesn't feel like you're checking something off. It feels like you're like, oh, this is this is part of the fabric of what we've done, and it doesn't feel so random, and it doesn't feel so pressure.

You know, so much pressure and forced. Just beware of these things. So many people I wish I could. I do a lot of premarital counseling.

I actually started a program when I first started my practice back in two thousand and eight because I was like, oh my gosh, if people just knew these things at the beginning of their relationships, they might not be coming in with the at the end of their relationship. So being aware of this and like being a I guess a consumer of relationship education, I feel like we don't do enough of that.

If you are in a place and I mean I get the you know, the other things that you've discussed, but if you're in a place where all of a sudden, you're want you're feeling this urge, or you're feeling like these different feelings that you haven't felt before, how do you give yourself the confidence to like express those feelings

Well, I think one of the first things that you can do is first be sure that you understand what it is that the big deal is. So if you if you haven't been experiencing pleasure on your own or with your partner, I would say tapping into that and really taking some time to learn how to experience pleasure and learn how to give yourself pleasure because for a lot of peop people.

They especially women, we won't go.

After it because we don't really know what that it is and we don't feel confident that we know what that is. It's like, you know, I don't get that sense from erics, so I'm not going to talk to her right now, but yeah, everyone else, you know, really trying to figure out what makes you feel your most, if it's your feminine energy, if it's your masculine energy, whatever it is, whatever makes you just feel like that release, that sense of giving, that bonding, the responsibleness, the four

And let me learn too. I think also too, there's something to you know, good girls or you know whatever. You weren't really raised. We're raised with somewhat of a gurgirls, don't you know, like sex. There's all of these different things around women feeling comfortable in their own skin and give yourself permission to just either know your body or to get to just feel comfortable in an intimate situation. I think that's half the battle, right, That's half the battle.

And I also think that it's one of the things that creates long term relationships. Sure, if you are just wanting to hook up, you don't really need to care about what's going on for the other person and you're just getting through it.

But if you're wanting to be in a long term relationship, this.

Is a key factor. Having lasting physical intimacy is a key factor in doing that, and it's a part of the investment that goes into long term relationships. And anyone that tells you otherwise is misguided, right, They're just they're missing point.

You know.

That's I think the last time we spoke, we talked about my book before Intimacy Styles, and it's all about helping people to understand how to have long term, lasting physical intimacy. Because again, if you want to get out there and date and you want to have you know, one night stands, and you want to have quickies and you want to try different things, awesome, all for you, for you.

But going into that long term.

Is where people really struggle because there's this kind of like disconnect connect, disconnect, connect and trying to figure that out. As you know, people who've really a lot of people have really gone into this monogamy mindset. If it's not easy monogamy a E and having kids and having businesses, multiple businesses and travel and all of that, it's not easy to keep that connection. So it's really important that you look into it and really study that with your partner.

Well, thank you so much for coming on you guys. She has so much incredible insight and more information that she would love to give you. Guys. Will you give our listeners some information just so they can they can find you?

Yeah, everything is Doctor Viviana, spell out d O C T O R V I V I A N A on all platforms, my website, get my emails.

I tend to do a lot.

Of fun stuff in my emails, and of course all my products on my shop. But I'm so grateful for you, ladies, and my heart is with you and everyone in LA. I'm hoping for the best for y'all and just love y'all and love everything that you're doing things.

Okay, Eric, and I need to ask you a question. Don't get mad at me. I'm not How was sex with Tom.

Very fifties, very nineteen fifties, very very very sweet, very sort of non adventurous.

Okay, so like it? But were you always on top or were you always on bottom?

It switched around? But my point is this, there was not There's a different it was a different relationship like that sexual relationship was not something.

That was at the height of the entire thing, right, was it at the beginning?

I think we definitely have more sex at the beginning than we did at the end, for sure. I mean, but it was twenty years you know, I mean, you know he had undergone a lot of changes.

And what is your like and you can grill me too, So whatever, But what are your like kinks or fetishes or like, what's your thing? What's like the one thing that's going to like really make it happen for you.

I had a lot of group fantasies group, yeah.

With involving more than one man, or involving women with one man more than one man. Have you ever had one?

No, but you asked me what what you asked me?

What was going on?

What's going on in yours?

So something for me, it's I'm like very like I don't know what the word be, like tactileic. For me, there's like it's it's smell, it's voice, it's like.

No.

But if you have those things, then I will show more of myself to you. And I like to be dominated.

You think to be dominated?

Yet, Yeah, I think I'm such an alpha and so many aspects in my life, like I'm not super into wanting to have like soft, cuddly sex.

Yeah, I hear a little for you.

Yeah, it's a little bit. I mean, there it can be.

But you never had me I had. Have you ever had multiple partners at one time?

I haven't. I've never had a threesome Edwin. Back in the day, me and Edwin, this is pretty kids and stuff. We were can considering it, Like we found like there was somebody we both thought was attractive, that we were all flirting. We were in Vegas, and then like at the end of the day we just kind of looked at each other and I was like, I don't I think this is going to be a bad idea ultimately.

Yeah, you know, I can say things like what I said to you about like you know, what is your fantasy and it means you know, it's multiple people. I can say that now because I'm single, but that's not something that I would have considered if I was married or in a relationship. Because I'm completely and totally single, I can say things like that, does that feel you know what I mean? Do you understand where I'm saying? Yeah?

Well, I think where I'm a little bit. I haven't found porn that I.

Like, like really not at all, not any of it.

No, Like I really good, but like I'm very particular. I mean, granted, if you look at my history, it doesn't seem so. But like if I'm watching someone.

Well people, but that's that's a very specific thing because you're watching it for a specific reason. You're not watching it to be in a relationship with these people. You're watching it for an end result. So of course you can be particular.

So that's been a little bit tricky for me. But I think what I've realized now, which I didn't know that I needed. I think so much of what I am into, even if it hasn't led to sex, it's led me to want to. Is the way is somebody kind of like takes charge and talks to me about it leading up to it, even though it hasn't happened, Like and that's that's new to me, that feeling that like want now.

But you have a high drive, a low drive, a medium drive, like are you?

I mean it was pretty during like my not to not to be a downer, but during like all my cancer stuff.

It was very very low I'm sure, and.

Like beyond low, like couldn't And I mean now that I'm getting divorced, I haven't. It's not like I've had you know, It's not like I'm like whoa, let's go. But no, I'm thinking about it a lot. It's good, like I I and that wasn't I didn't normally think of sex like. That wasn't something that was in my regular thought process.

No, I feel, you.

Know, I'm finding myself getting hot and bothered, and I'm like, like, I'll get a text message or I'll get it and I'm like, oh my god, did I just feel tingled?

I like that though for you. Yeah, you're a human being, that's right, you know, And I can imagine my being sick and things like that's the last thing in your mind. But oh my god, we're single.

We're single. We're single and apparently ready to mingle.

Apparently, how are you doing over there on the hinge?

On the hinge.

We're up to photos and prompts. Oh yeah, yeah, she's shaking her head.

You're gonna have to put in non negotiables for me. I put mandles like that, what's what's a what's that?

Like?

It was like something that you can't possibly handle. And I said mandles like you know when men wear sandals.

Oh, mandles, it's oh sandals, non negotiadle A mandle like a man sandal Like I not was that your onlyndle non negotiable?

That's I think I said mandles and chewing like I've kind of was just sarcastic and my uh and my things. I wasn't taking it very seriously. But now that I've talked to someone that, I was like, Okay, I'm kind of into you. Now I'm like, one, do I need to like actually take him more seriously because apparently it can lead to something? Or do I just leave myself as being a study.

I don't trust anybody. How the fuck am I going to do this? I don't trust anybody. I don't believe anything anybody says. I'm not gonna do well on this thing. I'm just not. I just I am too fucking jaded and just you know, no you have to.

I mean, well, then don't but like have fun with it for your Well, yes.

I'm gonna have fun with but yeah, no, I can have fun with it. I'm just saying, like I know me, I'll be like, a that's impossible.

Well, but also that's all you know, I do that ship too, Like I'll get compliments or I'll get somebody like, oh you know you're so second. I'm like, oh, what now, Like, I can't it's very hard to accept a compliment.

But no, I can do that all day long.

So what is like, Okay, what's the craziest place you've ever had? We filmed this on Beverly Hills and they never aired it. But where it's the craziest place you've ever had?

Seed? I told you in the hospital when I had a head injury.

Oh yeah, we both were hospitalized, yes, yeah, yeah, I forgot. Why did they never air that?

That was they used to make us say all their ship and then they never yeah hospital.

Yeah, both of us for hospital.

That's where hospitalized. Yeah?

For me, it was you know.

Are you into dating doctors, lawyers, businessmen? What? What's what's up with the old career?

I mean, I'm not really into like an I'm a fiver, I would say, because one, I don't like to do things late at night. Like I don't want somebody that's like I'm mortal author shovery single day and I'm there from seven am till seven pm. And this is just like No, I want somebody that's their own boss and coming out like there's a little bit of freedom in their life because I I mean, look, I regardless like I can do my job from anywhere. I'm sitting in this fucking camper right now doing it.

Right now, I'm doing my job in this corporate apartment in Broadway doing it.

They Yeah, you see what I'm saying. We have jobs we can do that. There are certain people that their professions do not lead to that. Like if you're an accountant, I think you like, do what accountant things do? I don't know. I don't I'm not necessarily into an accountant.

Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I don't know. You know. I think I'll just have to see how it goes. I just have to see how it goes well.

The last person and that you were with a month ago that you haven't told me about, which I'm a little bit irritated, is that a repeat person? Is that a repeat person or is this a freshie?

It's not a new person. Hold no, it's not a new no. No, but it's not who I No, okay, not at all. No, no, no, no, no, this is not a new person I've been seeing. It's not like four weeks.

Fine, fine, okay, then what's the what's the rule? You know now that we're new into the swimming of things like what happens with like condoms and like all of that stuff, like what goes down here? What what's the sitch?

I don't really know. I mean I think that you should have safe sex, like, don't be stupid, but I'm probably safe sex is you should be paramount, should be up top.

But yeah, but what do I tell like should I just start texting people before you know, we go out after a couple of times and be like, hey, I'm allergic to latex. So if you're thinking, are you really don't remember my eyelashes? I can't have big eyelashes.

With eyelash eyelash glue and condoms are different latexes.

No, I can assure you with one hundred percent your latex condom is a problem for me.

It has to be text Well, then why don't you keep your own condoms that you like? And then that way if you decid because it's going to be your choice.

I mean, it doesn't that seem a little bit like this is what I'm doing my Tuesday nights. I'm wrapping it up and let's go.

Well, nobody has to know. I mean, if you get down to the moment and it is what it is, you can just be a girl scout and be like, I've got my own protections, So how about that? And it's customer is what I'm.

Like bright Red even discussing the thought this.

Yes, but you're not You're going to have to do this and you're going to have to just accept that this is where we are in life.

What is the best way that you have an orgasm?

What do you mean like penetrast, penetrative? Yeah, I do it all.

Are you inner outer? You can do both?

Do both? I've trained my interesting things, not necessarily.

Yeah, I feel like we just need to use this interview as your hinge profile and then any issues.

Yeah, that'll get all the wrong people. No, but I think that No, you know, getting to know your body and something like that, especially when you're like my age, it's like it's it's a different vibe, you know. Yeah, I'm pretty comfortable with myself, and I know why I'm more.

Comfortable with myself now than I was ten years.

Ago, because you're feel comfortable in your own skin all the way around. I feel as if you you know, I don't know, I'm at this place in my life like it is what it is, due, it is what it is. Yeah, it just it is what it is. This is who I am, This is what I have going on, This is what I do for a living, this is what I don't do, this is what I've been through. You know, I can't you know, I'm going to sugarcoating our shit at this point, I know for whom, for what? I know?

Like you're going to figure it out anyway. Can we talk a little bit about Brookshields. Did you hear about her interview where she got about her Yeah, accidental vaginal rejuvenation. You know, I wouldn't mind to get an accidental vaginal rejuvenation.

What was her story? She went for a procedure and they did something added, Yeah, like.

I don't know what the procedure was. Maybe she was paying. I don't actually fully know the story, but there's clips everywhere about it. But she was very open about her sex life and what she was into. And I guess she went in to get something done. My guess is something and like, you know, I jump on a trampoline, I'm gonna pee Like that's right. Yeah, So my guess is that she went in to get Oh no, I think what happened was I think she went in to get the esthetics cleaned up a bit, and then they

I'll send your picten.

But are you one hundred percent close clamshell? You mean yeah, so you're one hundred percent any Yeah, m hm, that's so nice for you.

Yeah, that's good. That's good. It's good. Yeah, that's how I was born.

Yeah, mine is not Mine isn't like a RBF or RBC. But it's not an army RBC roast beef curtain. I did not have that.

Oh yeah, right, you don't have the meat curtains.

I don't have a meat curtain. But I'm not one hundred percent close clamshell.

I'm a closed clamshell.

I wonder what is it a genetic thing, because it has to.

Be that's just how I think, it's just how you're born. I think it's just you know, it is what it is.

Do you have better orgasms with circumcised or uncircumcised penises?

I prefer circumcised penises, but I that's not saying, uh, you know, there's a lot of Europeans. I mean they have a hood on and they're hot, So I really don't care.

If I mean we're talking about I mean people have been married to not using if you're using a condom, I don't.

I don't know.

But the majority of the humans in my past sex life, I had a very hard time having an orgasm with a circumcised penis.

Oh I don't.

Well, I don't know. Now I've got to learn something.

You've got to learn some things. No, I have no problem, but.

Like everyone in my family is like that was like, are you know my my brothers aren't my husband was.

I remember when my son was born, they asked me do you want to circumcise them or not? And I said yes, is that you know.

I was surprised that Edwin wanted to circumcise Crew because he's not. And my dad was very like steadfast about not having my brother circumcised because he's not, and andone was like, Nope, let's do it. And yeah, so you know, it is what it is. I don't think it necessarily makes a difference. Maybe it's just the people not the penis. Do you think size matters?

Yes? I do you do? Yeah? Do you think size matters?

I think if they're like super thin, that's I don't need it to be like ginormous by.

Any what I asked, I said.

If they're thin, yes, it matters. Yeah, the girth matters more than the length.

In my opinion, I think it all matters.

Do you think it all matters? And do you do you have better ones on top or on bottom or on reverse cowgirl?

I don't like reverse cowgirl. I think it hurts sometimes me too. Why it's not like it's it's flexing down. Yeah, I don't like. That's not my favorite.

So but what's your favorite thing?

Well it kind of depends what mood I mean, so probably I don't know. I like them both like I like on top of it on bottom. I mean I can have can orgasm either way. What about that?

For me?

I I will it's hard for me to orgasm on bottom. Oh, I prefer on top, but there like has to be a certain method, like I have to be on top and they have to like almost arch their backs so that like I know that there's like a muscle or something that pushes up. Yeah, of course if that doesn't happen, like but also for me, it's my mind, like if my mind isn't.

That's what doctor B just said, yeah, saying like.

If I I have to like really be in that or it's all that.

Are you sober during sex? Do you like to have a cocktail or what?

Or I mean I am open to either. I would say I'm probably more wild after a cocktail because I.

Oh, yeah, for sure, for sure.

But no, I mean having orgasms. It doesn't matter if I've had a cocktail or not had a cocktail. It's really like my mindset. But no, I'm definitely probably more vocal and more you know, it's like filming a housewife show. I'm gonna probably say all all the things, do all.

The good things, do all the good things.

Oh, my gosh, but yeah.

I'm excited for I gotta pick listen, no, I gotta so the next stages on my hinge over here, we have to pick the pictures and maybe I'll send you some and ask you what you think perfect.

And then maybe the next time we're in person on the pod, we can go through and select who is welcome to.

Get on my hinge anytime, and I will you know what, let's exchange.

Oh, that's what we need to do and pick and do something.

We'll do it. We'll do it live. We'll exchange phones. I'll be home in a couple of weeks. We'll exchange phones, and then we'll just go.

It's perfect, all right, Well I expect this to be done, Lie, I'm going to put it on the group chat.

You we'll do it. We're doing it right now. We're trying to just get it, get it. You know, I got to pick some pictures that make me look normal and that make me look insane.

Well, you know, then then don't pick one of your confessional shock.

I know, I know, I listen, I've already been. I don't know that we have anything for this. Do we have normal pictures?

I said, thinking of some of your looks that you could put on.

There and oh no, that's run them right off the pet. That's if we wanted to date gay men. I know exactly what to put on my profile. But if we want these straits to answer, we're not going to be.

Should we put on that red latex out that you reamed me out in?

Yeah, it's real hit. Listen, my text is a king, you know, I know somebody that's into late text.

But isn't it hard to get on and off?

Like? What are you going to do?

Kind a hole down there?

That was just the top so and I think you know, it's just it's just a baby powder inside so that you just don't stick to it.

Should Erica knows that I don't. Well, you guys pretty much, if you've listened to this pod and you had the opportunity to have sex on one of them, you're probably going to have more fun with Erica.

That's not true. Teddy is just trying to make it out like she's not wild. I happen to know who she is, which is why we do this pod together because I know who she is. So there's that.

I'm sure that we need to probably do another one. Of these in six months after I've had a little bit more practice, and then.

Girl, you're going to outpace me. I'm telling you, nobody's going to hit me up on this thing.

Do we keep like a little journal?

We should we should keep we should keep analytics or staff ats or whatever they call them. You know how they always show us, like write a growth chart to see what our our analytics are, our.

Our strong months.

Right, all right, I love you, miss miss you too.

Kicking ass.

Thanks, all right, Bye bye, honey,