Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner (except Ash)

Falling apart over here.

Oh fucking right back at.

You falling apart. I'm still sick. I've got heartburn from last night, and i also have a hammer woid. I reckon.

What a lucky lady April is. But you got me sick?

Fuck off? I did you got me sick? Mate? You got everyone sick. No.

Last time we recorded, You're so breathy in the record. Yeah, we crammed into that table at your place. I hopped in the car we finished going, it'll be a miracle if I don't get on well from this record.

I wasn't contagious. We know.

We definitely shouldn't have fucked afterwards as well. Yeah, it didn't help.

Thought, come he's going to do it.

Welcome back to Doting Dad. I'm a very sick Mattie Jay and I'm Ash. And this is a podcast that is all about parenting, the.

Good, the bad, and the relatable.

And we just want to say the front end of this episode that if you are hoping to get any type of advice, there is absolutely none to be given whatsoever.

Zero.

And I also want to say that Ash and I are currently nursing what some may call a small hangover.

Not me, mate, and I don't get them. I'm just sick.

You are a little like even when you blink, there's pain and.

It's like a slow blink.

There was a football game.

There was a football game last night.

It was a Grand Final and we're recording this on a Monday morning. So this is post graand Final and it's a very sad day, not just because we're unwell, but because the Broncos unfortunately.

Didn't get the w did They didn't when you were on track to get it. And you can't give them an inch, mate, No we can't.

And we spoke about it last week that I had received a ticket to the Grand Final Ash hadn't, and you said this, Ash.

I guarantee you I'll be there on Sunday. Yeah, you have like a weird got away.

You're like you're just a magnet. And what happened was I got a phone call from a lovely lady who works at the Brisbane Broncos. She's like the media manager, and she said, I have two VIP tickets to the match. Keeping in mind I already had a ticket with producer Keisha. I did offer her the VIP tickets. She strikes again, politely declined, and then I called up none other the.

Cat they call me always land on my feet. Don't know how I do it every every time. I just pulled through.

You didn't even want it either, like it like obviously you'd accept, But it wasn't like you were out searching for it.

No. I was like, Oh, I do the right thing, my boys. The worst thing I could possibly do is go to a football gaming yellets and punters. But look, an opportunity comes out.

Do you know what it's like? Ash, It's like, imagine it's the gold Rush era. Yeah, Okay, everyone's digging, working hard, trying to find the gold.

I just mosey on it, like there's a piece of gold. I'll take that. Actually, no, I don't want it. Okay, Oh have it?

How big is that nugget? Oh it's the biggest ever discovered. Anyway.

Sitting in the CEO's box at the NRL Grand Final.

We went to the pre game player send off, which was quite nice.

I love that we were there and they were like, oh, you're meant to be in this section where all the food and stuff is. We're just out with all the punt Like, yeah, what is this?

We didn't really know what we were in for. And Jimmy a lovely actor on Home and Away?

Who does he play on Home and Away?

A character called Justin Morgan?

Right? Is he one of the what do they call him the Riverside Boys or something?

I don't know. I should know the answer to this question. I don't. He looks too squeaky clean, he's very polished. He's a fucking handsome young man.

Yeah, he was not young though, he just looks young.

He's holy shit, his.

Forties, mate, what is he fifty? Shut up? If he's fifty, a fuck off.

I have a guess how old he forty nine, forty seven?

Wow, he looks great.

He looked good, looks great.

I would have thought like forty forty two, forty three, maybe.

Looks unbelievably good. Also a doting dad, yes, a scout. I believe his daughter eleven years old.

Yeah? Good.

We might have to get him on the podcast. I didn't know if we should, Like, as we were talking parenting.

We need to have like any executive decision on whether to get him on or not? Not not? Should we?

No, I'm more for it. So we had a lovely pre game send off for the players all looking handsome. At that point, I was feeling great.

You're very confident, very confident, and as you should have been, Like I said, that was your game.

Well, I looked at Reese Welsh and if anyone's not familiar with what he's like as a.

Parentel down, and.

Ash looked over and I was in the corner covering in my own scene. I let that meme.

From just South South Park me.

He's like, yeah, Ash was looking around because anyone's seeing Maddie j And I'm like in the corner, excuse me for one second as I douse myself and my own semen.

Do you know what I didn't like about that?

What?

Because as we were just talking about before, I've been so sick, I've just been paracetamol aspirin. My guts are a bit hey you going, And we're in such a quiet, tight knit spot, confined to a fine hotel lobby. Yeah, we couldn't let him rip because it'd be obvious it's me the guy looks sickly. And I was like, you know, like afterwards, I like mosied over to where the reception was and just and moses back, just so that I could get one out.

It was air conned in the foyer and you were like already beads of sweat coming down your brow. You had a bag, a little ziplock bag full of paracetamol, and like menthoalss and excusing yourself to fart in the corners.

But I still I still got there.

Can I just say the biggest surprise of the entire day slash evening. We walked from so where the players get their send off. It's maybe like a kilometer or less from the stadium. So we walk over to the stadium and I'm looking around and I'm like, oh, where the.

Fuck is Ash gone?

I look behind me and you're shaking hands with the Prime Minister. Oh yeah.

It was so funny because he was like talking just like some young boy, you know, And I was like, holy shit. His security detail is quite masculine, quite tall, and I was like that weren't they. So I was like to him, I was like, you're protecting this bloke like I had, like I was mates with Elbow, and albow turns around. I was like, mate, I just want to shake.

And was it like did you go for a slow shake, like because if you like coming for a fast shake you might get chicken wing down.

I went in for the like the full hand slap light like we were like we were mates, and he was like, good to see you mate.

I was like, yeah, have a.

Good night, and like carried on and then I went past the security detail before and I was like, you're a big motherfucker, right, and he was like only the biggest mate. Only it was like he was just like a good bloke.

But do you reckon? They look at you, and you reckon, they do like a quick little risk assessment, a low risk. This guy panting wheezy, he's so weaky Gussie.

Yeah, I mean I'm more of a bio hazard, but I know it was good to meet the promise and so elbow if you're listening.

And if he's sick right now, sorry bro, if he's waking up with a husky like.

I just loved how everyone opened the door for him like very like grounded. But then he'd be like all right back into his suite and they just like opened the door and security detail followed him, and I was like, fuck, imagine what the President of the United States.

To be like, Yeah, that's our version is such a warded.

Down I know, but you know, if we went to the States, all of a sudden, you turn around and I'll be shaking hands. Fu did he do that?

But we got really lucky because obviously we were there like we were and not I don't want to make it sound like we're turning our own horn here. However, we got invited in the end into the box, which was like the CEO of the prison Broncos. Like again Ashwicks, the.

Cat slithered, the snake slithered my way.

In the king Cat. And at one point, for anyone who doesn't know, Broncos are up like eighteen points.

Oh h.

And at that point everyone where we were sitting, everybody was hugging, we were kissing random.

P Everyone's now sick.

But like there was a point where they were like, hey, after the game, everyone's going to come back into the chain rooms and like we're already talking about the celebrations and I'm like, wow, are we going to party all night?

We might have to cancel the podcast, And just like that it turned into a funeral. It was the box.

The box is empty except for you, me and like two other people.

And I was just eating Gormet party pies, just like there's that video of me and you're like filming me like nothing's happened, because obviously that's not my team. But like I was there for the Broncos.

I think you had like two chicken strips, a couple of meek.

Piles, Like how can you eat at a time like this? I was like, 's gonna eat?

Man? It was a time of morning. I'm just just chaing out like the table.

That's why I got hart. It's funny because I was like, I was in bed last night and I must have let out a burp in my sleep. It's stung all these like gourmet meat piles. Actually, I feel like a meat pie now I've said that.

Oh my god. But yeah, we after the game at one of the hotels. They have like a postgame function mostly for you know, the met It's called a wake.

Yeah.

People in attendance are like the members, a lot of staff, and it was very very somber.

It was. It was a tough crowd. Yeah, it's like, should just get up and say something?

I was like, someone needs to break the ice here.

That's going to get up and say something? What are you going to go on a thirty.

Hello for those of you who don't know me. I'm Maddie Jay.

I've got voice. Yeah.

I came home and I did the.

Old set, choked off on the couch, went sleep.

Yeah, it's minus the jerk off.

That's a shame.

I was like, I'm just going to rest my eyes for one second, and then I fell asleep. Woke up at three point thirty and I was like, fuck, had a quick shower because I was feeling and then I lay in bed, and then I was about to go to sleep, and then I just had this reoccurring thought, how the fuck did we lose the Grand Final? And I lay in bed for like two hours, just like we were three tries up.

How And the thing is, I said, Ezra Man will win this game, and he scores a hat trick. I'm like, I fucking call that. And then King Cleary just came and wipe the floor with it.

And absolutely sucks. My poor neighbor, let's call it Barbara. She hates it when I leave the lights on because it goes straight into her so her bedroom right behind me upstairs, lights downstairs like and sleep on the couch and lights like the whole house lights on. And I walked out this morning to get a coffee and she was like, how good was the Panthers match last night?

And I was like, oh.

Then she was like, you have a big night. Noticed there was all the lights on at three a m. I was like, oh, sorry, Barbara, not now.

Shut the fuck up. O. Can't you see I'm morning, Barbara.

But that is the end of the NFL season.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. And look, I'm kind of glad. I'm exhausted. I don't know how the players are feeling.

Although now that we're in not only with the Prime Minister but with the Bristol Broncos, we're in the thick of it.

Yeah, right in the middle of it.

Who knows where it will be next season.

I tend to find when I go to these things, they never invite me back, like one hit wonder I know, I just like get too lit up. Anyway, Matthew, that's enough of Grand Finals. I'm sure that people were sick of it. I wanted to talk to you today about disciplining your children. We do touch on this here and there.

Can I just ask you quickly, ash before we get into how you discipline your children, will you ever smacked as a child.

Actually, it's funny. I ask that because someone asked me that question, and I think I was definitely threatened to be smacked, but I don't recall. Oh no, yeah I was smacked. Yeah, now I think about it. We were talking about this yesterday. Yeah, that's right. Jimmy was asking this question, wasn't he. Yeah, yeah, the third doting dad now because I was, you're a wooden spoon.

I was a wooden spoon, and my poor mother nowadays we're like, do you remember you used to hit us with a wooden spoon?

And she's like did I just suppressed that?

Yeah, I'm like, I have a memory of you breaking a wooden.

I wonder how many people he's the kids one on. How many people now have realized that they were hit as kids and sued their parents now as adults.

Let's do it, Ellie Johnson, if you had any money.

Yeah, because I was a wooden spoon kid too. But I was saying yesterday, once I hit the wooden spoon and Mum comes out with a hard plastic spoon, not one of those flimsy came up. Like I'm talking like hard fucking plastic and that thing thing fucking hurt Stills.

But we turned out fine. But obviously nowadays he's that type of behavior you can't do that no longer warranted.

It's not warranted. It's kind of like illegal. Sorry, it's illegal.

So how do you dis if you can't take to them with a kitchen utensil? How do you discipline your children?

Actually just hit him with the car? No, no, no, no, obviously not half for those listening, two different ways. Because I've got a boy or girl, discipline is different. So with Oscar there's a lot of like goad your room or like he's also older, but Macy coming up, young, Macy coming up. We haven't quite figured out what works best in terms of.

Because she's super cheap, like her personality type.

Yeah, she's super cheeky.

Okay, asking you like you take his toys?

Yeah, he hates it. I'll be like, look, I'm taking this monster track and I'll hide it. I said, when you are good enough, you'll get it back. If he's really, really bad, it's straight to the bin. I one time we were upstairs and there's a balcony off our bedroom and he was just being an absolute turd. So I just took the car out of his hand and fucking launched it out the balcony door onto the road, hit by car. Done. It's like, it's just like something out

In the heat of the moment of the moment, it was just sometimes your emotions get the better of you.

But yeah, Usually what works with him is, oh, so if you don't stop or whatever, you do that again, I'm going to take the current toy that's the favorite, and then you'll have to earn it back. Usually works, Sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes you thinks I'm bluffing and so it's going to go on the bin or I pretended to go in the bin. But with Macy, we haven't quite worked it out yet because she's at that age where she can't fully talk. She can say words here

She's a little sign assassine. Whenever I see her, She's so sweet and innocent, and then I'm like, where the fuck are my car keys? And I look out the window and she's just driving and she's like.

See a bitch. We've tried a couple, Like, obviously if I get a stern voice. She didn't take it seriously. She doesn't know that that's what that means.

Lola is a bit like that. Laura tries to say, do not do that.

Lola starts yeah, literally, yeah, Maysy, you'll smile back at me. And it's infuriating. But we did try something which look, I'm not going to say it worked or it didn't work. It didn't backfire either. It was just it was too cute that we just started laughing. So we did it. We're like, let's try the naughty corner.

What did she do to warrant the naughty corner?

Oh? She hit Oscar with a content She had a container, sorry Oscar, and he was down on the ground with his monster truckt and she just went bop on the top of the head, like yeah, yeah, it made an annoy and she knew it. She was like, she's smiling. Bag. I was like, right, I'm gonna try this in the corner, naughty corner.

Where's the nordy corner.

It's just like where the dog bowl is. Anyway, I'll show you this video because it is like the cutest. I couldn't start like, I was like, fuck, I have to film this. Don't turn around. You stand there and think about what you've done, and Oscars just love.

He's like this is awesome. It's not me for once.

But she a couple of times, I'm like, off to the naughty on it, and she'll take herself to the nooid on it, and but she'll be like, keep looking back at me.

How long is she going to stay there? For? Not long?

And then that's the day. But she went for two reasons. One reason was that time when she's hit Oscar and I said, you say sorry to Oscar. She'll walk up and like Patty in my that's super cute as well, And again I'm like, I can't take this seriously. And then one time she did something else. What did she do? I can't remember, but it wasn't to anyone, but it was just naughty behavior. And she did it and then she did it again, and I was like, off to

On the show.

Anyway, So that's the approach I've taken for now, and I'll keep you updated. But it was just like I could not talk about it's so cute.

Do you know what they do with daycare? Which kind of works with Marley Lola, like similar scenario. She's too young to understand what any of this means. But Marley's so emotional, like she like she's such a it.

Just comes out of him, right, Yeah, but she also.

Like hates to disappoint mom and dad, like mum and dad upset, and so we do this thing.

I wonder who's set that standard. Matthew, don't disappoint me.

But if we say to her, what you're doing right now, it empties my cup, empty my bucket. It's empty my bucket.

To manipulate this child, and it's pretty red.

She understands, she gets that. But the other end of the spectrum, if she does something really good, I'm like, you're feeling my cup or you're feeling my bucket one of the other. And she sometimes I'm like, my cup is full, and I fucking laugh that. And then when I so she's misbehaving and she's like in that little like she's wild and hysterical and won't get it. I'm trying to get a dress, and I'm just like, you're emptying my cup right now, and it stops her in the track.

It's such like a first child things who I've noticed that like everyone talks about with your first child, because now you've got a second child, you've got to refill the first child's cup one way or another. Right when we had Macy and we did in the hospital had like a little program still there and they talk about just fill that cup. However they needed to be filled, even if you give them a cuddle and just do not let them go until they're like at a point

I mean, yeah, I don't know how to parents, so I'm like, what are you guys up to? You guys do it quick question on daycare? Whenever I pick up the girls, they always kind of throw out the like Lola had a really good day?

Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah? Did they really?

Yeah? I'm like, ah, like has she ever had a bad day? They only like only if she's like on the brink of death with illness. How they been like, oh, she was a bit quiet. But every day they're like, shit, a great day.

Yeah yeah. I think it's part of the training.

It's just like they have to say that, right yeah.

Yeah, I mean they still want you to pay money for them to go. They view every day they're like, look, not a great day, just we just went. It was like when Oscar was sick and he was just laying around everywhere, like the teacher there was like he was off today, He's not usually.

Like but then she's like, but he had a great day.

But he had a great day? Did he did? He he was at home all day?

Hey, Ash, do you remember last week's episode?

We don't recall is the one where I just was asking, is fucking people had to listen to me panting into the microphone.

I've forgotten what an episode sounds like. Well, we're not sounding like this?

Is it? Is it that we're working too hard, we're working too hard, we're parenting too hard, we're parenting too hard, that our wives are listening.

I'm exhausted, give us a very very tired. But one of the listening questions was how can you tell if someone is going to be a good day?

Oh?

Yeah, And we joked and we said that the great. I've had a couple more submissions because you know, I don't know for sure, but I'm assuming we may have a few listeners being female who you know, thinking about potentially starting a family with their partner.

Maybe are we going to provide some help?

That's what I'm trying to say.

Are you going to rattle these off me? I've got a couple them off to me and I want to react to them. Is that cool? Please? So? Do you get much?

Tons? I love that, Tons.

It was so funny that the way that we wrap that around getting your cars such a general maintenance thing to do with something that you'd spend all this month.

Because the obvious one, right is, you know if he's caring. If he's caring, you see what he's like with other kids. Obviously that's a great.

Walking around playgrounds beating kids up, or.

Like going to playgrounds and trying to play with kids that aren't.

His that's the bar is very low.

The bar is extremely low.

And we didn't set the bar the boomers, the boom.

Blame the boomers. But these days, like if he's not let's say, if there's no other family members, you have young kids, you're not seeing him interact with any other kids, and you think, gosh, what can I look out for that is going to show me that he's going to be a great parent. We have some signs, so people take.

Note on me.

Number one, this is how to tell us someone is going to be a good dad. He packs his own lunch for work, something that I used to do back in the day.

So much care little lunch bag. So true, because you could could I would just be like, I'll just kiss something when i'm there. But packing your kids lunch is one thing, But then packing your own lunch as a fully grown man.

If he's bringing like a little snack and a ham sandwich fucking get pregnant right now?

Is he an apprentice?

Like? What the heck's going on here?

But that's good?

Yeah, okay, he's another one if he has undies that haven't totally fallen apart and have holes in it, which again bar is very low. If he wears clothing that is not half destroyed.

What is it about. It's just such a basic hygiene to just replace your underpants. But like as man like April will replace her underplant underplants underpants regularly. April's like, are you still wearing these? And they're like a big fucking hole and scratched my arse off. Look, if the guy can buy a new underpants, he's going to be an excellent dad.

If he doesn't piss all over the toilet seat, also a great sign.

He's got good aim then too.

Well, I mean not to judge those who have extended four skins.

Oh yes, yes, six skins. That is how six skins brothers out there? Yeah?

And okay, this one, this one I'm not sure about. But she submitted it and she said, this is how I can tell. She says, if he lets you eat off his plate. Oh yeah, like, I guess sharing food I guess maybe because that's like a generous.

Yeah, because you don't want to be like she goes to get something off your plate.

And like, ah, I'm a bit like I mean, yeah, I'm a bit like Bay, get your own.

But also like if she's like, can I have a bed?

I was like, yeah, okay, so we are like molding together. What great dads look like pre kids?

Okay, so between us we could be one good dad.

Yeah. Yeah, I mean I've not taken all the boxes.

Yeah, boys, all get together and become become one good dad.

Every week we'll drip feed some of these. You know, there's many many things.

Out basic, just basic stuff. I love that. Should we do ordinary parents? We decided every repair ordinary repair.

We don't know what we do. We don't know what we're doing because we'repair.

Matthew Budget Smoker's most Ordinary parent. These were people write in and tell us their most ordinary parenting moment, and they win two hundred dollars worth of Budget Mugger product.

You think you've got the winner in the bag, I've got one, which I think is not. It's going to be a close race to who gets the vouch.

Should we just do I'll just say the one that I think is the winner, and.

As you know, start with the one that's not the winner but still very strong and good enough to be on the podcast.

Yeah, so we'll start with this first one from Jessica, who emailed in on two two d D at outlook dot com dot au get him in. She says, because we winged about the kid's artwork, that we get what she does is and actually this is not ordinary, this genius. When she gets all this artwork, what she does she uses it as gift wrapping and sends them back out. So she's sending them off to some other parents to do with this shit artwork.

She's offloading it. Yeah, and offloading.

I think, Look, it's not ordinary, it's also very good.

I like it. I think Marley and Lola or Marley in particular.

Would lose it if you started if we like because.

She's always like, where is that rabbit that I drew three months ago? And I'm like, I don't know, and she's like, I wanted to go to bed tonight. So if I'm using that as wrapping paper, I reckon she might flip out.

I tried to put some of his drawings in the bath with him, and I'm like, what did you think?

Fuck?

I love that kid. Okay, but do you got this is what you think? Is one that's gone through.

This one's from Courtney And she says, straight off the bat, no judgment, please please? Yeah, okay, okay, she says. Now, my sister, who is twelve years younger than she is, she was fostered by her family and so she's basically because of the age difference, she's basically a third parent. And they went to the Disability Expo a couple of years ago. And at that time Courtney was studying and

Think of the savings. What do you do with all those people? You don't need one hundred and thirty pens?

What do you she says? Am I a bad person?

No? Court absolutely far from it. Savvy that is, and look think of the savings. That is good, very clever, very clever. Okay, I thought these both so far, both of the two that we've rattled off have been genius parenting.

If you ask me, I think if more people were more savvy, Australia would be a better place.

It would be. Yeah, totally. But I've got one which I think is the winner, which is from Page. So Page goes on to tell us that she just went out to run some errands and left two kids at home with dad. Eight, five and seven. Okay, harmless, Okay, She's gone out run some errands and she's come back and said to her husband, where are the kids. He's like, oh, they're just watching a movie. So she's gone and after.

The kids are seeing Move On Disney Molana maybe Elsa, yeah you think.

So she's walked into them watching Sausage Party and I don't know if you're familiar, Matthew, but they were watching the Orgie sex scene where various different foods essentially fuck each other. And because it is animated, they've obviously kids.

Brilliant, brilliant.

That's our winner this week for sure.

That is Hey, sex education and it's entertaining.

I know that's great, So Paige, we'll get in touch. Congratulations, and I don't think Courtney needs any help.

She's got one hundred and thirty pens right now pocket and the thing is well.

She also said at the back endo that email that she's got we just got video evidence. But whether we want that or not, I don't know. I don't want to watch this watching porn.

This is a PG rated podcast. We can't be putting out that type of content. So what was her name?

Her name is Page?

Paige. Congratulations, you've got tred bucks worth a budge smuggler gear.

Yes, and guys get them in in the DMS sent us an email. We've got a few more left over the course of this year to give away. But Matthew, should we do some questions?

Let's end on a couple of questions, please.

Ask run out of steam.

We've done well well to push on through.

Persevere through my tonsils. I reckon, I needs.

I reckon you've got tons of lightists?

No, I just need them out?

But that would would that mean you have tons don't. I'm not a doctor, well neither am I, but I'm just putting.

Ash yes.

Every week we invite the good listeners of this country to ask us any question they like, and we pick out two of the best. Obviously, we're not answering in the hope that we give any advice. This is purely for entertainment purposes. But the first question is and it's very fitting that this one is targeted towards you. This poor mum has written in very confused, and she says, why does my husband's poop take so long his time when the toilet has significantly increased after we have had

This is how it works. I'm going to tell you how it works, so that in the course of a whole day, Matthew, there is the amount of time parenting in that day. The more time you spend on the toilet, that time significantly reduces. Yes, So if you're like, I'm going to do a shit, you just bought yourself thirty minutes of me time.

Because it's the one activity that and I guess showering are the only situations where you completely remove yourself from any responsibility of parenting.

And I locked the door too, apels not a locker, so would you look the doorf because of the kids coming in. Yeah, OUs, you can reach the door handle, lock it. If she wants to take a shit for thirty minutes. Couldn't care less.

Because I actually think dads are very good at being lazy or efficient in their parenting. Any mum's out there, I encourage you to take longer shits.

Take them.

I think, like for their monthly poo, take as much time as you want. Yesterday, to Laura, I'm like fucking strap on in, get a glass of water, get a pillow, take as long as you want it. Yeah, a judger.

I thought yesterday that I called it wele doing a shit with the door open, but she was doing a Wii. But the thing is, she was doing a Wii and it's right next to the bath, and she'd pulled the plug in the bath and the plug was making that sound. And I've walked past. That's my girl, Get a babe.

Laura does it all the time. Laura does it, and the Wiize just turned into poos and then she's already like sat down the toilet seeds so she can't get up.

They're actually efficient, just like shitting and piece at the same time.

So men do it because we're lazy we're just.

Trying to reduce the amount of parenting we.

Have to do that. And sometimes I don't have any intention of being on the toilet for twenty minutes.

It just happened, just doom scrolling.

Once I get into that scroll.

Probably why I've got hemorrhoids. That explains a lot I think I do. I don't know.

Let me show me afterwards.

Have a quick peep.

Okay, last question. Last question is because today is a public holiday, so we've got a lovely babysitter, Charlotte. He's got the kids and they've just come home like scratching on the front door.

Matthew. Similar topic. I suppose how many times does your kid fast a day? Maybe not numerically, if you're counting kids farts all day.

Girls, the girls fart quite a lot.

Yeah. I was saying that Oscar Oscar loves to drop it and then look at what you're like, he's done. Yeah, it's so funny.

I love a fluffy we call him Fluffies.

And Macy's just a she just farts when she's startled. So like the other day she was in she was actually in bed and she was just like playing with a toy or something in bed and I come through the door and I was like, oh, morning, and she was like.

It's like it's like my mom, Yeah yeah, he's really just a seventy three year old tractor toddler's body.

Totally. Yeah, but I look, I wouldn't know how many times it but.

My loves it, even like this morning, I was getting it ready, putting a rundies on, so I'm like, crouch over and she's just like.

Looking down the barrel, down the barrel of the gun.

And she's like, enjoy that. Dad. She's like, that's pretty smelly, isn't it.

She was just like you smell, mate?

She they're punging.

Oh yeah, they're like adult shit, it's chicks.

But again again, once I turned into adults, women.

Don't fight or pooh once a month. Maybe so I've heard.

So I've heard. You know, you know who was the gassyist in our household? Laura by Far. Oh my god, is she unbelievably post kids.

She's like April to actually April laugh farts. Sometimes we're just like laughing up and I'm like, are you fucking serious?

Get out of this head. They don't Lauras don't smell like Laura's are just I'm not even trying to be cute, They're.

Just pure just air.

Or is mine smell like decaying flesh?

Yeah, I took a shit this morning. It's smelled like dog shit, so I should stop eating a dog for it.

But we're a household that embraces a fart. Yeah, I love it.

Anyway.

On that note, we need to stop talking because we've got we've got nothing left, and we need to save a little bit of fuel in the tank because tomorrow we're chatting to Amy Gerard. Everyone like I had hundreds of messages of people saying we would love to have her on the podcast. Its locked around first Mum, and we're gonna have he wrong. We don't know when it's going to drop, but maybe a couple of weeks. We may have to make you guys wait for it, but it's coming. But if you have we're going to do

Please send me because we're doing another one this mom, and we'll do Parenting Lives and then November we've got to heap ordinary parenting stuff coming up because that coincides with the ordinary rig.

Ah yes, yes, entries for that are they.

Being Yeah, yeah, it's an international issue. Yeah.

Yes, So if you're listening with an ordinary rig too late next year, ordinary parent, welcome aboard.

Yeah, it's still still something to win.

Come on through. If you have enjoyed this episode. I'm guessing by the sounds of our voices there's not many of you, maybe one or two, but we would love it if you would subscribe, give us a review, Share this episode with anyone who you think may enjoy listening to Two Husky Men, Two Husky Dads winge about losing a Grand Final, and we'll talk to you guys next week.

See you guys.

Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.

We pay our respects to their elders past and present, and then that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Islander peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land